Live Your Values

What are values and why do they matter? with Michael Robert Moore

May 27, 2020 Episode 1
Live Your Values
What are values and why do they matter? with Michael Robert Moore
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

What are values and why do they matter?
In this inaugural episode of the LYV podcast, Bagel and colleague Michael Robert Moore explore the topic of values and dig into their significance in our personal and professional lives. A serial entrepreneur turned business advisor, Michael shares some practical tools and strategies for identifying your own mission-vision-values as well as those for your professional brand or organization. There's even a hot debate on values and personal hygiene. We dive into it all in this can't miss first episode.

About Our Guest:
Michael began his career as an award-winning serial entrepreneur at the age of 23. He has since built multiple million-dollar businesses in various industries. Over the past 10 years, he has trained, coached, and consulted over 4,000 entrepreneurs from around the world helping them to create the life they want, funded by a business they love.
You can see what Michael is up to at his website www.michaelrobertmoore.com

Mentioned in this Episode:


Connect with us @lyvshow on social to continue the values conversation!

Ep. 001 Interview

Bagel: Hey, this is Bagel. I just want to say thanks for checking out the Live Your Values podcast. If this is the first episode you're listening to, welcome. If you were listening to another episode or were somewhere else on our website or on social, and we referred back to this one. I'm really glad you came here.

[00:00:15]This is our first episode that we launched and really sets the tone and the stage for everything that's to come. And this is a great conversation. So I just wanted to say thanks jumping in. 

[00:00:26]  Be sure to connect with us on social @lyvshow on Facebook and Instagram and continue the conversation around values and stay updated on all the exciting news, events, and teasers that we have coming out.

[00:00:40]  Let's jump into this week's episode. 

[00:00:42]I had a lot of fun recording this inaugural episode with Michael Robert Moore. We focused mainly on defining values for yourself, but we also touched on topics like utilizing your unique talents and strengths, the importance of garnering feedback, how to categorize your relationships and connecting with your purpose.

[00:00:59] We even argued about how personal hygiene fits into the values conversation. A true kickoff episode in fine form. 

[00:01:06]So without further ado, episode one of the Live Your Values podcast. 

[00:01:11]Welcome to the Live Your Values podcast. I'm your host Mike Bagel, and today I'm beyond excited to welcome our guest for today's episode. My fellow coworker, Captain Michael Robert Moore. Michael began his career as an award winning serial entrepreneur at the age of 23. He has since built multiple million-dollar businesses in various industries. Over the past 10 years he has trained, coached, and consulted over 4,000 entrepreneurs from all over the world, helping them to create the life they want funded by a business they love.

[00:01:56] Thank you, Michael Moore for being on the show, Live Your Values. I'm really excited to have you on here. Michael and I have worked together for a little over a year now at the Small Business and Technology Development center here in the Charlotte area in North Carolina.

[00:02:14]We both do business counseling and we've had lots of great business and life conversations. I think so far in the year plus that we've known each other. And I know that Michael's a big believer in identifying your core values and living by those values. And I know that there's  lots of  ways that that can be emanated throughout your life, both for you and the people you help.

[00:02:38] So first of all, thanks for being here.

[00:02:40] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah, man, my pleasure.

[00:02:43]Bagel: So why don't we just get to know you a little bit and then we can kind of jump into our topic for the day. So tell us a little bit about you, whatever might be relevant for the topic and kind of what you're, what you're doing these days and maybe something particularly meaningful that you're working on right now.

[00:03:00] Michael Robert Moore: A little bit about me and what's meaningful. So, I don't even know where to start with me other than to say, at this point in my phase of life, my wife and I have two boys that we're raising. And that's our primary focus on trying to wrangle in these two knuckleheads. And. So they can survive in the real world one day, hopefully.

[00:03:25] And, so that's kind of where most of our folks focus goes today. We also try to do as much community involvement and outreach as we possibly can. And I try to mirror my career and my entrepreneurial endeavors around that, around those things with family. And, I try to look at it as faith, family, and freedom. Those are the three things that are most important to me.

[00:03:54]Bagel: Yeah, that's great. I think you've kind of shared that with me in the past. what are, what are some of the, the ways that those three values kind of guide your, your everyday cause I know you're a guy who likes probably like me, like have you have your hand in lots of different things. You've got interests in different things with your job and projects and obviously you've got a family life.

[00:04:16] So what are some ways that, that those values kind of guide the things that you choose to,  participate in,  your life? 

[00:04:23] Michael Robert Moore: Well, I'm an opportunity addict and I'm also a an an entrepreneurial addict. And so it's, I think, more important to have some clarity around your values. The more opportunity you have that you can seek out because. You can't do everything right. You have to choose where you can make the most impact and where you're going to get the most fulfillment.

[00:04:48] And so how do you do that? Well, you can. If you have, the more you have filters, you can put things through, the more you can say, this is either a heck yeah or heck no, and that's the way I try to approach things as an opportunity comes through as if, if I don't know whether it's a heck yeah or a heck no, then it's a heck heck no.

[00:05:06] And, that's worked pretty well. I wouldn't say it's always easy, but it does simplify things a little bit more to where you look through and say, how does this affect my faith? How does this affect my family? How does this affect my freedom? And if it violates one or all of those, it's likely going into the heck no.

[00:05:24] And that helps me narrow down where to focus, and I don't really have to think about it as much, so I don't get that decision fatigue that comes along. that can be overwhelming sometimes.

[00:05:34] Bagel: Yeah, no, that makes a lot of sense. and I think looking at at your values as a filter is, is a common theme  about how that can help drive decision making and be an easier way for you to feel confident about whether it's something you want to. You, you choose to want to do in your life or, or you might push away.

[00:05:54]I love your, your heck yes/heck no philosophy. And in fact I, , I had heard it before, but I tried to adopt a little bit of that over the last year of just understanding and recognizing like if I've got a certain gut feeling or maybe I don't have a gut feeling that's really like secure, definite. That usually is a sign that maybe it's not the right thing to do, maybe just at that moment or, or at all.

[00:06:18] So I really liked that as well. I'm curious, and I'm sure we're going to kind of get into this a lot more in the conversation, but, I'm curious for those out there who maybe struggle with that, that piece in particular of like trusting a heck yes or a heck no. Or maybe they don't even know what that looks like or feels like for them.

[00:06:37]How, how would you help someone navigate that themselves if, if they're, if they're struggling with different choices in their life and they're not really sure.

[00:06:46] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah. This is a topic with every client that I have that I work with doing business advisory because. They are making so many decisions at one time. They're chasing so many different opportunities. they don't want to let any opportunity potentially go by. And that actually turns into a paradox where the reasons why they became an entrepreneur in the first place are the things, very things that they sacrifice.

[00:07:13] So they want more freedom. But yet they get trapped into their business and they wind up working more hours than if they had a normal job. They want more income, but yet a lot of them struggle to maximize their revenue and their profit profits. They want to make a difference, but oftentimes they find themselves so reactive to their business that they're every day is just trying to survive that day and put out the fires of the day.

[00:07:37] And so part of the problem, the reason for that is because there's too many non-essentials. That they're allowing into their business and their life. And it's actually not about doing more. It's about doing less. So when you focus on the essentials, that's what's key. And so that's where a lot of people will say, well, what are the essentials?

[00:07:58] And that's a, those are layers that need to be peeled, that actually start with who you are and why you're here. And so my belief is that everybody on this earth has a purpose. And I don't remember who said it, but there's a quote, you know, the, the, the most important, the two most important days of your life are the day you figure out who you are and why you're here.

[00:08:22] And I believe that. And I think when you determine that, you can then determine the values that are associated with living that purpose, and now you're on that path to creating that filter that helps you make those decisions. And it helps you to simplify things.   

[00:08:39] OverlayBagel: I want to take a moment to call out what Michael just said. Once you figure out who you are and why you're here, in other words, your purpose, you can then determine the values that help you achieve that purpose. This is a crucial first step that so many of us skip. When was the last time you took some time to stop and reflect on who you are and why you're here?

[00:09:02]Let's keep it rolling.

[00:09:04] Michael Robert Moore: So for somebody who's just starting out in this. Trying to determine what your life's purpose is, can seem like, Oh my gosh, I've been trying to figure this out for 20,30, 40, 50 years.

[00:09:14] Bagel: Yeah. It's a daunting thought.

[00:09:17] Unique Strengths & GiftsMichael Robert Moore: So if you take a, if you look at the DNA of how you're made up, you have specific strengths and gifts that that combination of strengths and gifts only you have. And so that helps to define your specific purpose because we may have similar strengths and gifts, but I don't think any two people have the exact same strengths and gifts. So that's where the unique purpose comes in. So if you don't really know what that purpose is, start with your strengths and your gifts and start to find that theme of what those are that can be applied to any area of your life.

[00:10:00] Your business, your career, your family, your role as a parent, your husband, your spouse, whatever. Those strengths are universal typically. So if it's something that's only in this one area of your life, it's not one of the universal strings and gifts that you have. So when you start to identify what those are, and oftentimes asking other people what they are, helps you to realize that because sometimes we're using our strengths and gifts and don't even realize it.

[00:10:29] Because they're so natural to us

[00:10:31] that we don't. Yeah. We don't realize how impactful they are to other people until they tell us that and we're like, Oh my gosh, and then we start to determine, okay, from those strengths and gifts that are universal, what is the purpose of that? How does that impact others and how can I use that in every area of my life?

[00:10:52] Man, when you figure that out, you know you're, you have fulfillment, and I think that's the key is to be fulfilled. Not happy. I'm not rich. Not whatever, not famous. Not, we all know those things don't last, right? Otherwise there would be no suicide in Hollywood, but you've got fulfillment that comes in. That fulfillment is there.

[00:11:15] Whether you make $5 an hour or $5,000 an hour, and I think that's key.

[00:11:21] Bagel: Yeah. I couldn't agree more. And, and really sort of the, the legs behind wanting to do this podcast is, is to help people live a more fulfilling, more meaningful life. And I think you're spot on. And I know, I know we've, we agree on a lot of these things. you know, finding that purpose I think is so crucial.

[00:11:37] And, and for some people. You know, it could be a lifelong pursuit. , you might not figure out exactly what your ultimate purpose is, but it's sort of that working towards, you know, filtering it down. Like you said, getting, eliminating the waste, getting rid of things that, that, that don't fulfill you.

[00:11:56] Is just as important and crucial, I think, to help hone in on the things that do. So I like that perspective. You also mentioned something I wanted to dig into just a little bit, which, which is, this, this piece of helping to identify, or discover your own values, strengths, passions. You called them universal strengths. So I know we've talked a little bit about some helpful tools that are out there. , strengths finder being probably the pinnacle one  that you and I both really are behind. Do you want to talk just quickly about how that's been helpful with you in clients to help them identifying strengths.

[00:12:31] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah, sure. I think there's a lot of tools out there that you can, you can use. And some of that boils down to personal preference, right? So I'm not necessarily advocating one over the other, but I do, I have seen the most results, the best results. So I'm a little bit biased towards Gallup StrengthsFinder and, that really helps to understand the collection of your strengths and how they work together uniquely. And what's interesting is we may have the same strengths that are in our, say, top 10 strengths on when they do that, but they're, because all 34 strengths are, part of how that's determined who you are, our descriptions of each of those are going to be different. 

[00:13:19] And so it really is. Unique. And I think that, and, and these, by the way, don't confuse this with skills, okay? Because you can develop a skill that you don't enjoy doing because you had to have that skill to survive. So for instance, creating spreadsheets, I have somewhat of a skill in doing that. But I need a nap when I'm done with it because it just sucks the life out of me.

[00:13:47] However, there's other things that I do that give me energy when I'm done with it. And so that's how you can determine what your universal, true strengths and gifts are is when you are using these. And I use an exercise called Superman & Kryptonite. And as cheesy as that sounds, if you sit down and think about the things that you do that are like kryptonite. You do them and you're just exhausted. And even if you're good at it, you're just drained by it, and then sit down and make a list of the things you do when you're done with them. You feel like Superman. This is a good way to start to figure out where your zone of excellence is, where you can contribute to the highest level in every area of your life.

[00:14:32] And there's part that that's starting down the path of figuring out your purpose right. So, yeah, I think StrengthFinders is a good way to, like a good way to start that. and there's others out there, but that's a good one.

[00:14:45] Bagel: Yeah . I think the idea that, you know, we go out and we, and we have experiences, like you mentioned before, different buckets and areas of our life where we're, where we're active, we're doing things, we are, we're sort of being our natural self most of the time without really thinking about why we're doing things.

[00:15:03] And then I think the step of then reflecting back, and in some way, shape or form assessing what, what gave us energy, what things, you know, we enjoyed, gave us fulfillment, where we, where we excelled versus the areas where we needed a nap afterwards, or maybe things that we just absolutely hated doing and, and really have no interest in developing a skill around.

[00:15:26] So, so it's like doing the thing, the reflecting on the thing and then helping to like, crystallize, or clarify. You know, which one of those things , provide us meaning, which one of those things are strengths versus skills. And I really like how you differentiated that skills: we may have things that we do just from a survival aspect versus the strengths are the things that really motivate us and we are, are like almost excited about and are natural in our everyday life.

[00:15:54] Are there any other assessments or tools or tactics that you've seen people use to help help clarify or discover things about themselves that have been useful.

[00:16:05] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah, there's, the Enneagram I think is really cool. some people like that better than string finder and for whatever reason, you know, sometimes it just comes down to personal preference. If you're having, if you have someone who's guiding you through it, you'll want to use whatever they they've mastered in guiding you through the process of understanding you and your gifts and your strengths.

[00:16:28] Which brings me to another point. You don't want this to be just the process you're doing. You wanted to have other people giving you input and feedback, and those people, they can't be haters and they can't be, yes, men or women. Okay. They have to be people you trust to tell you the truth, so you don't want to go.

[00:16:54] People go to people who are against you or are somehow resentful or negative toward things that you try to do. But you also don't want to go the other direction where you have people who just agree with everything you say. You want to find people you trust to tell you the truth, to provide in- input on your discoveries as going through this and understanding your strengths and your gifts.

[00:17:21] Bagel: Yeah. I think that's crucial and I'm really glad you brought that back up. The feedback loop is so important to help us sometimes to help us see our blind spots, but also to reinforce the things that you mentioned earlier that are second nature to us that we don't even realize that we're, that we're good at, but that we're doing that are helping other people.

[00:17:40]it's funny, I have, just a quick little anecdote and a personal thing here. I have a lot of really good friends, but I have two  best friends from growing up. And I w I kind of see them as both sides of the coin, where one is the very idealistic positive, like, "you're awesome dude."

[00:17:57] Like "you can do this" kind of kind of persona in terms of our relationship. And then the other is the more practical, I don't want to say the devil on the other shoulder, but like more of the, like. "Come on, like think more critically about this," and he's the one that kind of gives me the hard shoots a little bit more.

[00:18:13] And honestly, I think both are really helpful. But I think what we're talking about right now in particular is, is that the last side that I was just mentioning, where you have that person who probably you've got a strong relationship with, right? There's gotta be some trust where you know that what they're hopefully providing you in terms of feedback is something that you can trust and, and not take us criticism, but take us as help or maybe it's constructive criticism, not just like trying to bash you and tear you to pieces. But that's so important to listen to that. And sometimes I know it's hard to face those truths, but I like what you're suggesting here, which is like, you know, be open to that.

[00:18:51] As long as you know where that person's coming from and if they're trying to do it to help you, like be open to that and listen to that. And if you don't have that person in your life, I dunno if you have any thoughts about where to find that person, but I think, sometimes it's just, you know, maybe that person exists, but we just haven't been open to asking them those questions. 

[00:19:11] I know that that was the case for me growing up. Like I probably didn't want to hear a lot of this stuff that I was good at or wasn't good at. You know, it was kind of afraid, and we all probably still struggle with that to some extent, but. You'd be surprised. You know, it takes a little courage, I think sometimes if you just say, you know what, I'm going to go to my sibling or my best friend or someone that I really trusted and just want to see what their take is on this thing that I'm, I'm unsure about or I'm struggling with.

[00:19:38]I don't know if you have any other thoughts around that too.

[00:19:40] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah, I do actually. those are some good points. I think relationship is kind of what you're talking about, right? People you have relationships with and you have to find people, like I said, that you trust to tell you the truth, but you have to approach them prepared to accept that from them.

[00:20:00] And what that means to a lot of people is, and especially for me, I have to surrender my pride. I have to surrender my self righteousness, I have to surrender my, tendency to be defensive and either debate them on why they're wrong so that I can justify not having to change. Right. And so that process has to be, you have to approach it in the most humble position possible so that you can become better.

[00:20:32] And the relationships that you develop. You know, when I work with, with entrepreneurs, I tell them there's three buckets of people in your life for relationships, and you either are, you need to eliminate, moderate, or cultivate. So everyone, every relationship you have falls in one of those three buckets.

[00:20:58] This is either a person I need to cultivate. This is a person I need to moderate. This is a person I need to eliminate. And having the discipline to do that allows you to create boundaries that creates an environment for you where you can thrive because now you're surrounded by the, by the people that you need to be surrounded by.

[00:21:20] You're in limiting those people. You need to limit and you can now approach these people. Who you can trust to tell you the truth. Do it in a humble manner, and continue to use that as an as a way to cultivate the right relationship normally with people who are farther along than you are because you want their wisdom.

[00:21:41] It's not necessarily knowledge you want to absorb. It's wisdom within that. So then that comes with experience. And usually that comes from people who are probably farther down the line than you are.

[00:21:53] Bagel: For sure. Yeah. I really liked that mindset. I th I think, you know, the eliminate piece is pretty self explanatory, right? Like people in your life that you probably, the relationship just probably is better off, not existing for whatever reason. That is, I guess, could be your decision. Cultivate: you've kind of described a little bit there.

[00:22:16]I'm curious where, what the moderate one means to you and why someone might choose to moderate a relationship that they might have.

[00:22:24] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah. So if you've determined that someone is not either fully for you or that too much exposure to this person could become toxic. If it's already toxic, it's an eliminate. Now, sometimes what if it's someone like a family member. That you don't have a choice? You can't really fully eliminate that. Well then the goal is to moderate that as much as possible.

[00:22:50] And typically that means access to you, moderate that access to you and  people treat you to the level of your tolerance. So when you don't tolerate certain things, you are moderating. How they can affect you. Then you're setting boundaries and you're teaching them what is okay with you and what is not. And if they're not cool with that, they're not a cultivate. Don't you know? And you want to, and they can vary, right? So I have a family member right now that's in the eliminate category because it was necessary. At any point in time, there's a reconciliation there. We can get to moderate. And over time, we may restore something to where we get to cultivate.

[00:23:37] Bagel: Okay.

[00:23:37] Michael Robert Moore: Okay? So that's how those can can, can work. And it's hard to do because a lot of times this means having difficult conversations. It means having to take difficult stances on things. And it could be a shock to people if you've gone your whole life without setting boundaries and things like that.

[00:23:57] Bagel: Yeah. 

[00:23:57] Michael Robert Moore: But that creates your environment and your environment is more.It contributes more to your success than almost anything else, even your talents and abilities.

[00:24:08]OverlayBagel: I wanted to take a minute to point out that I definitely had some resistance to this idea at first, which I address here in just a minute during the conversation. But I do think it's worth pointing out that because Michael and I have built a trusting relationship and have language to use around our somewhat contrasting perspectives, I was able to understand where he was coming from and see his point more objectively.

[00:24:31]Yeah.  it's funny, so I'm going to be really transparent and say, it at first, as you were describing this, I had a little resistance to it because it almost feels like, to me, it almost felt like you were... trying to control others. Not you, but I'm saying the idea is like, it feels like, okay, like you get to decide who's, who gets to be on this like high pedestal and who gets to be in the middle and who gets to be gone.

[00:24:58] But as, and that's why I was kind of wanting to unwrap that a bit more because I see where you're coming from with it. And I think it's about setting the appropriate boundaries, which was something, a phrase you used. And I think that is really important. We only have so much time, energy, resources in a lot of cases, you know, I know for myself, like I've got a lot of friends and so it's, it's hard sometimes to figure out where the boundaries are of how much I can give to certain friends versus others.

[00:25:26] And, and not even just friends, but other people. I have relationships with, coworkers and acquaintances . So I can see the value of saying, okay, you know, if there's someone in your life that is sucking the life force out of you and there's no productivity to that relationship.

[00:25:42] Yeah, absolutely. I can see the need to eliminate. It helps understanding a little bit about the moderate piece that you were talking about there. and then the cultivating thing I would agree with, and it's, it kind of goes to that mantra that's a lot of people have heard out there,  the five people you surround yourself with the most are the, you know, is what shapes you.

[00:26:00] That's  what I thought of immediately is like, who are you surrounding yourself with to, to grow and to, to, to be nurtured as well, but also to be able to give back to those people.

[00:26:09] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah, I think it's important to, well, by the way, before I say this, do you have harmony in your top 10? Okay, so not to get off on the topics that people may not understand who are listening to this, but the fact that you have harmony in your top 10 would trigger me saying, you need to eliminate people and you need to exclude people, right?

[00:26:31] Because the idea of excluding people to someone who has harmony is not cool. Right? So I think the key to that piece to it is harmony. People don't enjoy conflict. Well, when you have people in your life that are, that are in conflict with your values or the direction you're going, you need to control that.

[00:26:53] You need to control your environment. There's been scientific studies done where they put an average person in the best possible environment and test them against an average environment with the best possible talent, and the environment wins every time.

[00:27:13] Bagel: Wow.

[00:27:13] Michael Robert Moore: That's how important. So you should control your environment as much as you possibly can to structure that for you to fulfill your purpose. And part of that includes your relationships.

[00:27:27] Bagel: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. And I just want to tell our listeners that that is a real life example of how the StrengthsFinder can be a useful tool because Michael and I agree on a lot, but not necessarily everything, and the fact that we have language to use to, and for Michael to recognize that right away and say, "Hey.

[00:27:45] Do you have harmony in your, in your top strengths?" Because I can see, he can sense that that's important to me and why I might've had resistance to something. And then we can kind of find, not necessarily agree a hundred percent but find some common ground to be able to, to understand where each other coming from, which again is my harmony is trying to speak there.

[00:28:01] But anyway, I just wanted to throw that one in there.

[00:28:04] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah. Yeah. I think that's good. And it's important to understand, you know, the key to relationships is understand yourself first and then understand the other person and their strengths and their gifts. Because that tells you how they're wired and why they do certain things, and it creates understanding.

[00:28:21] So when my wife went and I went through this, I was like, Oh my gosh, that's why you do this. That drives me crazy. Now I understand why you do it. It doesn't drive me as you know, still drives her crazy, but not as much. Right? And so that allows you to cultivate better relationships when you know yourself, you know others on, on an intimate level like that with their strengths and their gifts.

[00:28:40] And then what you can do is take those two things and you can synchronize and harmonize the relationship in a common direction. Does that make sense? 

[00:28:50] Cause otherwise, if people aren't for you and they're not willing to invest in a relationship like that, then they're against you whether they know it or not.

[00:28:59] They are working against you. So you need to come. You need to limit that as much as possible and double down on the relationships that are willing to go to that level to understand themselves, understand you, and how to synchronize and harmonize to cultivate a relationship.

[00:29:17] Bagel: Yeah, it doesn't make sense. I think what's interesting here, you know, there's a lot of, indicators that relationships are the key to happiness and fulfillment in, in life. And I, I won't go too far down that path right now, but what I am interested to hear your take on is, do you ever see with yourself or clients, conflicts of, of their own strengths and kind of how things  are affecting others in terms of relationships.

[00:29:47] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah. And then what's interesting is that everyone comes to me as a business advisor wanting the tactic that's going to get them the business result that they need. Very few understand the work that needs to be done on them as an entrepreneur. And so my goal, very simple, my purpose in life is to help others live a life of significance, period.

[00:30:10] And I have my own definition for what that is. It's not elevating themselves. It's fulfilling their purpose and how what they were designed to be here to do by serving and impacting others. And as a result, getting fulfillment out of that, that's kind of that. It's a, it's bigger than yourself. And so when I approach everything, whether it's someone in the grocery store or a client, how can I help this person live a life of significance? And getting them to shift from that business tactic onto themselves.

[00:30:43] I just use the businesses to get to the people. Right? And then we help them with the business tactic. That's the easy part. It's getting them to become who they need to be as an entrepreneur, as a person, as a spouse, and whatever to live that life of significance. And so that's my unique purpose is to do get to people through their business.

[00:31:02] And so when they have, when they're looking at their strengths, and we do get to that level. Cause you got to meet them where they are, right? Can't come in for marketing strategies and say, let's talk about your values and your strengths. Right? They're going to be like, "Dude, where are you not listening?"

[00:31:16] But when we do finally get there and they see the value in that, and we go through each strength, and I don't want to turn this into a StrengthsFinder commercial here, but we kind of went down that path. So we'll stick with it. Each strength has a balcony and a basement. So communication is one of mine.

[00:31:36] Okay. When I'm in my balcony using that, I'm clear, I'm concise. I'm using persuasive and influential, positive language and people are inspired by that. When I'm in my basement, I verbal vomit on people, and I over-talk, I overexplain, I over... and my particular communication, yours might be the written word.

[00:32:00] Mine is verbal. If you asked me to write a blog post. It'll take me a week. You asked me to do a video training on something, and it'll take me 15 minutes. So you have to know the style of the strength that you need or, and so that communication could conflict with one of the other strengths that I have.

[00:32:19] So the key is when you're in your, on your balcony for each of the strengths, they will not conflict with each other. Okay. So my, my wife has, achiever. As one of hers. Well, achievers are constantly overcommitting, burning themselves out. There's a whole basement to that, right? And so if she has achiever and she's in that over-committing thing that's going to stress her out and burn her out and cause anxiety, that will then throw her other strengths into the basement also.

[00:32:52] And the next thing you know, she's kind of living in this, in this basement piece where she's not happy, she's not fulfilled. And it's just a simple shift to get back onto that balcony of those same strengths and understanding what triggers throw you into the basement. So yeah, they will conflict, but not if you're not, if you're using them to fulfill your purpose, that's the key.

[00:33:16] Bagel: Right? Yes. And I can see how then. That relates to your bigger picture, mission or even vision of helping people lead a life of significance. It's, it's tying all these pieces up together or helping connect all the pieces of the strengths and values and, and purpose and all that to, to help people live that, that more significant life, which is really helpful.

[00:33:42]OverlayJust a quick note here. Even though Michael and I talk about defining values for your organization, the same can be applied to yourself as a professional or to your team within your company or even a project that you're working on.

[00:33:54] you've talked a bit about. Your work in business counseling. but I want to switch gears for a second  I think it might be helpful to explore what values are within a company or organization. And we can, we can just talk about small businesses since that's what you and I primarily do in our jobs.

[00:34:13]and we can start anywhere with this, but I'm just curious, you know. We, as people have our own values and we've kind of stressed the importance of that and ways to help discover them and align and all that sort of thing. What about for a business? How, how should a, let's say, an entrepreneur of a small business go about setting their values and how much should they be tied to their own personal values?

[00:34:38] Michael Robert Moore: Well, I'm going to turn that question back around and turn the question to you. 

[00:34:41] Bagel: Okay. 

[00:34:42] Michael Robert Moore: When you say live your values, do you mean this is how you do it at work or do you mean this is how you do it at home? Or do you mean this is how you live your values throughout your entire life?

[00:34:56] Bagel: Yeah. definitely all aspects of life, even though the word Live is in there and I maybe some people might associate that with like your, your regular life maybe not work. I think it's inclusive of everything that you're doing.

[00:35:11] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah, yeah. Working is part of living and. So I think if we, we, we can both agree what we're talking about are global. These are not just work. These are not just home. These are not just whatever. And the reason for that is because if we try to compartmentalize everything, first of all, you can't, you, you can't.

[00:35:30] There is no such thing as separation between the two. You take your work home and you take your home to work, period. It happens to some degree. And so, and they should align. I don't necessarily believe in the word balance because they're not going to balance. Because you may at some season in your life, be heavier into your work than you are in other areas and vice versa.

[00:35:54] But there should always be alignment. And that alignment is what you're doing with your company values. So when you have a core values of a business, that dictates the culture your company has, and if you don't dictate the culture of your company, you will have chaos.

[00:36:13] Bagel: Yeah,

[00:36:14] Michael Robert Moore: So you have a choice. Your, your culture will be chaos.

[00:36:17] You're going to have a culture, regardless. It can be come from your, from chaos or it can come from your core values. And the more those values are instilled and ingrained into the fabric of what you're doing, the stronger your culture is going to be. And it starts with your own values. So you have to take your own values and say.

[00:36:41] What of this transitions into this business or this work, and what does that really mean? So for instance, I may have, I have 10 core values for me professionally, and I not only write the word, but I write the meaning that that means to me, because you may have a different meaning for that word than I do and how it applies.

[00:37:07] So I want to be crystal clear on what that means. And I filter every decision I make through those, and I read them every morning. And so on if I have a team that I'm working with, they also get these consistently, either read to them, set to them, or they're saying them to me. So we're all on the same page.

[00:37:30] And then, that's a hiring thing too, is here's our core values. What are your core values and do they align to what we're doing here? So there's multiple uses of it, but it starts with your own values and then transitions into what do you want your company to stand for? What do you want to tolerate or not tolerate?

[00:37:49] What are your standards of excellence that you're going to have and how do you define each of those words that you put into that and try to keep them to, you know, three, five, seven, maybe 10 at the most. So there's not like a ton you have to try to remember, but having something you can tie back to so you can say, no, that's not part of our core values.

[00:38:09] We don't do that here.

[00:38:11]Bagel: Yeah, I definitely agree. I think, even up to 10 does seem like a lot. I think when I've, when I first started my company, my virtual assistant business, I had like upwards of seven or something like that. And, I think it was, my girlfriend was like, how are you going to stay true to all of those?

[00:38:28] Like. That's a lot. and some, for some businesses it might work, especially if they're may be intertwined or they're, they're like part of the daily practice or what other work that the, that the company does for their clients. It may be second nature, but, I would probably agree that the keeping it more like three to five, especially when you're starting out, the things that you know that you can, you can stay true to and, and really, practice in your work, I think is really great.

[00:38:54]I do think it's helpful. Like you said, to start with your own values and have a true understanding or deep understanding of what they mean to you and why they're important. And those could then sort of turn into or, or influence your company's values. I would suspect there's probably some cases though where like a company's values might, not differ, but there may be like some other stuff that you are trying to do as a company that.

[00:39:23] Might not be as crucial as an individual or maybe vice versa. 

[00:39:27] Michael Robert Moore: And I think that the way you approach the concept of your business is the same way you approach your life. So you have a life purpose. Within that life purpose is a vision you have for your life. What you do to impact others through that vision is your mission. And the standards that guide you through your moral obligation to fulfill this purpose; those are your values. No different, no different in business. What's the vision? Start there. What is the overarching vision that will never change for this company? What is the mission that you are going to accomplish within this vision and what are the values that are going to guide you through it?

[00:40:16] When you have clarity around that, when you know the why and the what, the how always works itself out. Most people skip that step and they're in, how do I get customers? How do I drive more revenue? How do I free myself from the business? But really it starts at the top with that clarity so that you can answer all the other questions with certainty.

[00:40:39] Bagel: Yeah. I think that was probably as as succinct and well-put as I've heard of mission-vision-values explanation right there. So we gotta make sure people hear that. 

[00:40:51]Overlay  I want to take a moment to pause and restate what Michael said here, because I think it's really powerful. Within your life's purpose. Do you have a vision? What you do to impact others through that vision is your mission and the standards that guide you through your moral obligation to fulfill this purpose are your values that really hit home for me, and maybe for you too, how much more meaning could you bring to your life if you take the time to think through your personal mission, vision, and values.   

[00:41:23] I think that's super important, both on an individual level and for a company. Until I met you, honestly, I don't think I thought about having like a personal vision or personal mission.

[00:41:35] I, like most people, like, you know, there's things that I know I want to do in life, but I think the way you're describing it, like there's, there's really not much of a difference. Like you are your own entity. Your business as an entity, you should treat it the same. And by thinking through these things, you can live a more fulfilled life because you have a clear vision, you have a clear idea of what it is that you're striving for day-to-day, and, and maybe not every single action that you take, right?

[00:42:00] Like brushing your teeth. It's something you just gotta do, but like the things that mean something in your life, the things that you, you choose to do, the bigger, the bigger things in life, I think can be guided by that.

[00:42:13] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah. I think even the little things, I think even brushing your teeth, so I want to, I want to push back on that for just a minute, okay. Okay. When you are taking care of one of the gifts that's been given you: your body. You are showing gratitude toward that and you are also preventing future potential issues that can slow you down in your vision and your mission. So when you are doing that, something as simple. 

[00:42:39] So I graduated from a military Academy. Okay? I remember one of the tactical officers used to always say, "Bud, you take care of the little things and the big things will take care of themselves." Right? And so a lot of times it's the little details. 

[00:42:53] There's a speech that was given by an Admiral that was a Navy seal, and his speech was about making your bed. If you want to change the world, start with making your bed. Why does such a small thing have huge impact of the simple thing of any makes this whole speech, if you haven't heard it, I suggest you Google a "Navy seal admiral Texas speech," Cause he was doing like a graduation thing for Texas or something like that.

[00:43:28] And it is amazing. It is. It is what it shows you that the little things do really, really matter. And a lot of times taking care of those little things takes care of the big things. So, anyway, I'll get off my soap box about brushing your teeth.

[00:43:45] Bagel: Or making your  bed. No. W'ell, we'll throw that in the show notes for everybody to make sure they see it and, yeah, no, it makes sense. It does. And I think what I, what I'm hearing and what I'm taking away from that is, is this is you taking your matters seriously. It's like taking your life seriously.

[00:44:04] It's, it's putting your best foot forward. Even with the little things that may seem significant, probably just because what I just did as I stereotype those things is just being routine, but just because you have to do them more consistently doesn't make them any less vital to your success as a person and to your, to, to living your best life.

[00:44:24] So I accept your pushback on that. I may still try to find something that I think is insignificant that we all do, but, 

[00:44:31] Michael Robert Moore: I'll have to come back to that..

[00:44:31] Yeah. To test me. I think it comes down to habits. And when you're creating, you know, motivation and discipline don't last. What does last are habits that you don't have to think about. And I think that's what you're talking about. And we don't. We don't want to take those habits for granted. Right? And sometimes the habits were working against us.

[00:44:51] So if you have, most people, for instance, dieting - they try to use motivation and discipline, and that wears out over time and then it fades away and they go back into where they work. But when you focus on habits and creating habits, you want to have to think about, it doesn't require motivation and discipline once it's a habit, right?

[00:45:11] And the way you can do that is change your routines. It's not necessarily stopped doing something. It's changing that routine. And what should that routine look like? What should those habits be? Well, again, it comes back to what are, what is your vision? What is your mission? What are your values? Those three things should be clear, concise, and compelling.

[00:45:30] And if you have a lot of people say, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got that in my mind. Who have you shared it with and did it compel them? If not. You need more clarity and you need to re refine and revise how you're saying what you're saying until it's clear, concise, and compelling.

[00:45:48] Bagel: Yeah. That's a, those are wise words. I think we can, we can all use a some time to actually spend on putting that together and thinking through it. And even for those of us who feel like we've got our, our life mission down, probably going through that exercise of, of actually using those three filters - clear, concise, and compelling - can probably really help us sharpen our message and our, and our actions.

[00:46:17]Great. Anything else on the subject of values to you that's important that maybe we didn't cover?

[00:46:26] Michael Robert Moore: I think knowing your compass. And what really guides you? What is the source of that? And do you really feel like your vision and your mission and your values, your purpose, if you will, is as compelling as it can possibly be for yourself to where when you wake up every morning, you're excited to fulfill it. If you're not, and I'm not saying you can't have bad days. I'm not saying you can't have, you know, a case of the Mondays, right? I think we all do that, but I think for the most part, if you have too many of those days in a row, there's something about your vision, something about your mission, something about your values, and when you're trying to live a life of values, if you aren't living the values that are true to you, to your moral compass.

[00:47:24] Wherever you find that moral compass, you are going to have internal conflict, and that internal conflict will manifest itself to try to destroy your life. And you will not live a life of significance if you let that happen. So that's why I believe in what you're doing. I think what you're doing is everyone should try to clearly define their values, what's most important to them, and also the source of those values as well, and make it a part of their being.

[00:48:00]That's what I would, that's what I would leave you with.

[00:48:03] Bagel: Okay. That's, that's the message from the Captain right there. I like it. Yeah. I think, we've certainly. Stress. The importance of this self-reflection, I think, has been a big takeaway from this conversation. as well as,  clearly defining for yourself, you know, what are, what are you living for?

[00:48:23] What is that? Why, what are the reasons? What compels you? Those sorts of things. This, this personal mission, vision, values, to help you live a more meaningful, more significant, more fulfilled life, which are three words. You know, the two of us kind of use a lot. so hopefully our listeners feel inspired, to some extent to go and do a little exercise.

[00:48:44] Maybe we'll throw a little, little worksheet together to help them through this. I think that could be really fun. And, Yeah. We appreciate your time, Mr. Michael Moore. Is there any ways that people can kind of check out anything that you're doing right now connecting with you, whether it's social or projects or anything that you've got going on?

[00:49:01] Michael Robert Moore: Yeah. The best way to see what's most current is my website michaelrobertmoore.com. And, that will lead you to all the other things that are, that are going on and things that we're doing through the SBTDC together and things like that as well. So anyone who wants to connect and do so through there.

[00:49:21] And also there's, you know, of course in social media too. feel free to reach out and connect. I'm always looking to cultivate better relationships.

[00:49:30] Bagel: There you go. Bringing it full circle. Love it. Well, thanks so much for being on and we appreciate you and, hopefully we'll have another great conversation pretty soon.

[00:49:39] Michael Robert Moore: Alright, brother. Thank you.

[00:49:40]Bagel: I hope you enjoyed listening to that interview with Michael Robert Moore, jam packed with practical lessons and takeaways. If you like what you heard, please hit subscribe in your podcast app so you get notified about all new episodes of the Live Your Values podcast with me, "Bagel." 

[00:49:56] Special thanks to Emma Peck for logo design, Danielle Gelber for marketing strategy, and my team at Free Your Time Virtual Assistants for operations support. Until next time.... 

[00:50:08]Get out there and LYV!

Opening
Guest Welcome
Michael's Top 3
How Values Drive Our Choices
The Entrepreneurial Paradox
Focus on Your "Why"
Identify Your Unique Gifts & Strengths
Helpful Tools & Assessments
Differentiating Skills vs. Strengths
The Importance of Feedback & Trusted Relationships
3 Buckets for Relationships
Setting Boundaries
How Strengths Influence Values
Navigating Conflict Between Relationships & Goals
Establishing a Clear Purpose
Strengths: Balconies & Basements
Work vs. Personal Values
Define Your Personal Mission-Vision-Values
Do the Small Things Matter?
Following Your Compass
Habits Trump All
Wrap-up & Takeaways