Believe Like A Boss
Learn how to smash your goals and expand the possibility of your life through mindset management, spiritual (energetic) alignment and intentional action. Join each week as Life Coach Nandi (rhymes with Gandhi) teaches you how to create what she calls "a life of thrive" with ease and authenticity. | NandiCamille.com
Believe Like A Boss
Creating Freedom Through Decision Making
Standing at the crossroads of life, we often wonder - are we making the right decision? Picture this - a podcast episode that equips you with the insights to navigate these crossroads with confidence and wisdom. This week on Believe Like a Boss, we delve into the transformative power of decision-making, a vital tool to becoming our best selves.
We all come across moments when our career decisions are heavily influenced by others' perspectives. What if we told you that it's okay to prioritize your own happiness and growth? Join us as we share the inspiring story of a client who made the difficult choice to quit her job and the lessons learned. We provide valuable tips to help you get in touch with your future self and make expansive decisions that align with your personal goals.
Change is the only constant and embracing it is the secret sauce to achieving your goals. We take you through a journey of self-discovery that emphasizes the importance of trusting yourself, acknowledging your desires, and handling changes with grace. Remember, it's okay to flip the script and break free from the status quo. Close the year on a high note and set the foundation for the next by tuning into this episode that is sure to inspire and motivate. Season five may be coming to an end, but the journey of personal growth and transformation is just beginning. So come, let's navigate the world of decisions, change, and personal growth together.
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Hi, friends, and welcome to Believe Like a Boss. I'm your host Life Coach, nandi Camille. Join me as I teach you how to smash your goals and expand the possibility of your life through mindset management, spiritual alignment and authentic action. I'll teach you how to create what I like to call a life of thrive, with ease and authenticity. It's time to play with what's possible. Are you ready? Let's go.
Speaker 2:Hello, hello, hello and welcome back to another episode of Believe Like a Boss. I am your host Life Coach, nandi Camille, and I'm so grateful for you all to be back for another episode. If this is your very first episode, welcome to the podcast. My name is Nandi, rimes with Gandhi. I've been saying that a lot more lately, I've been introducing myself to a lot more people lately and it's the story of my whole life. But it's hilarious.
Speaker 2:Whenever I tell people my name Hi, I'm Nandi I will usually get a blank stare. Sometimes I get like a little grunt like, excuse me, you said what? Because it's the first time this word, this name, has ever graced their brain. So it makes sense. I've never offended at all At all. People have heard the word gobbledygook more than they've heard Nandi right, and so that's. All that happens is I get to actively watch somebody's brain take in new information and then having something that rhymes is actually super helpful. Nandi rhymes with Gandhi. It cures so much and it helps people learn my name very quickly.
Speaker 2:What I specifically love is that anybody that met me in high school and college and when I first moved out here too, I had gotten through a phase where I was tired of correcting people. I was over correcting people. It was like I'm done, I don't want to correct people anymore, so I just started going by my nickname, which is Nani N-A-N-I. I just dropped the D and all of a sudden it was a lot easier for people to remember my name. So a lot of friends that knew me through high school and college call me by my nickname. You are all now welcome to call me by my nickname. I love it when people call me Nani. It actually makes me smile real big.
Speaker 2:All right, my friends, this week we're talking about decision making, so I'm still in the cadence of going through things that have been themes for my clients, and so this one and for this week, will be the last episode of season five, which is exciting. It's so bittersweet, it is so bittersweet, but this will be the last episode for 2023. I have some big things happening in 2024. Well, big things that are in the works. In my brain they're big things. I don't have any like major contracts or anything that I've signed. Don't worry you guys, I don't have some secret announcement. I personally have been working on some other big projects, though that feel big to me, several other big projects. So I'm going to take the rest of 2023 to set myself up for success in 2024. I'll still be active on social media, but this will be the last episode for 2023 and the last episode of season five.
Speaker 2:We're going to end with decision making, because our life and, as always, my friends, if this is a new podcast for you, I like to say take what sticks to you, leave the rest. If something doesn't resonate, please don't worry about it. It's not for you. Then we're not here to force any ideology on anybody. Truly, this podcast is about you learning how to better trust yourself so that you can take the steps that you need to to being your best self, whatever that means the stepping into alignment.
Speaker 2:Alignment means different things to different people, and what it comes down to really are our choices, and our choices are often, if not always, influenced by our mindset. That is why this podcast is called believe like a boss. Your beliefs are influencing the way that you're feeling, and a belief is just a fancy way to say your thoughts, right, your thoughts, the thoughts you think again and again and again. Those are your beliefs and, at the end of the day, your life is a result of your beliefs. But really what that means is your life is a result of your choices. When we make choices is cause and effect right.
Speaker 2:Maybe we've made some choices along the way that have left us With some results that we don't really like, so now we have a little bit of anxiety around decision-making. Maybe we've made decisions and for a while they were going really well, and all of a sudden Things aren't going so well, so maybe there's a little bit of distrust in okay. Well, when did I start making wrong decisions? Can I not trust myself to make good decisions? Or maybe you're just starting to make some bigger decisions than you've made ever before, and so now you're having to ask some bigger questions and maybe there's a lot more quote on the line For you taking certain risks or decisions, and so it makes a little bit more difficult. What I want to offer is a few different Tips pointers that I offer my clients to help you with decision-making. This was one of the very first things that I learned in my coaching journey is how do I make the quote right choice? So I want to start there.
Speaker 2:I love the saying there's no such thing as right or wrong. There's only what's most in alignment and best for you, your goals and your family. I actually wrote that myself along my journey as I was trying to figure out Okay, right versus wrong was the right decision. I came to the conclusion that for me and for my clients and the way that I show up in the world, there's no such thing as right or wrong. Now I say this lightly because my my devil's advocates out there I mean, really actually there is. Killing is wrong, you know, stealing is wrong. I agree with that.
Speaker 2:I'm talking about when you're trying to decide whether or not to take a job, when you're trying to decide whether or not to Remain in a relationship right, and this is I'm not talking an abusive relationship where you've been hit and you have been belittled again and again. I'm talking about maybe he leaves his cup on the counter and maybe he's not as ambitious as you want him to be, right, and so you're deciding whether or not to leave. Maybe you're to say whether or not to hire someone, and it's going to cost a lot of money to hire a hands-up handscape. Wow, where did that come from a handscaper? Hmm, I was going to say landscaper, but handscaper came out. But they're going to hire a landscaper. Or, if you're going to hire a coach or if you're going to hire a financial advisor, maybe you're thinking about moving states. I've worked with several clients through moving states.
Speaker 2:Right, starting a whole new life and a completely different stay. I have one that's talking about starting a new life in a new country. Right, when we're decision-making, often we think, okay, what's the right decision? Should I go to Florida or should I go to New York? Some of y'all already know what the quote right decision is right there, but there's no right decision. I personally would vote for Florida. I like Florida. Some of y'all were like New York. But there's that's what I'm saying. There's no right or wrong decision because we all have opinions. So at the end of the day, I want you to check in what feels the most Expansive to you when you're making decisions.
Speaker 2:Try to step out of right or wrong thinking. This is very all-or-nothing thinking which can actually paralyze us, because when we're constantly focusing on I need to make the right decision, I need to make the right decision, the brain is also constantly focused on I can't make the wrong decision. I can't make the wrong decision, and if we're in that place, it can often make decision-making just more difficult and it actually can cloud our brain that we're not thinking from the clear place of what is most in alignment for my goals. It's just I just don't want to make the wrong decision right. So let's shift that mindset.
Speaker 2:What feels more expansive? That's a question that was proposed to me, actually from Trishana years ago, when I was learning about decision-making and personal development. What expands you? That is, what is in alignment. We are meant to expand. We are meant to grow and stretch, and I mean that energetically, physiologically. We go from literally a seed and a sperm, a little minuscule thing, to big old humans. But we are born big old humans. We're born small and we grow. We are meant to grow. We are meant to expand. So when you're going to make a decision, see if you can step out of right or wrong and step into which of these decisions expands me more.
Speaker 2:Here's an example for you what if I leave my job now versus in one year? I was just having a conversation with a client about this and I had, instead of her, asking she was coming from the place of. Well, if I leave early, if I leave before the end of the year, then X, y and Z will happen, and it mostly had to do with ensuring that she can follow her goals, that she was able to transition in a way that felt good. Then, conversely, she said well, if I leave afterwards, then I might disappoint people. Da da, da, da da. Or flip it around If she left early, she was going to disappoint people. If she left later, it was going to impede some of her goals, but she didn't want to disappoint people. So check in.
Speaker 2:Are you making decisions from the perspective of other people? There's nothing wrong with that. I want to say that, first and foremost. I'm not saying that to shame you. It is human for us to think about others. It is natural that when you're looking at leaving a job, that you would consider your coworkers. That makes sense. What I'm offering is that you notice that, hey, I'm making this decision based on my coworkers and my coworkers only, and that's great. But what do I want without them, without considering my mom, my coworkers, my boss? It's not to say that we don't ever consider them, but just for a moment, when you're making decisions, if you were to take everybody else out, what is true for you, what expands you, what brings you closer to your goals? And then, when you look at the decision. Yeah, take a second. Look at the impact of that. How does that impact the people in my world? And do I still want to make this decision, knowing the impact that it could have? I want you to check in on that impact and I want you to make sure it's factual, because there's impact from the place of well, if I leave now, it will impact my team members, in which they'll need to hire a new team member to impact the project, and so they may emotionally feel a little bit frustrated, a little bit overwhelmed.
Speaker 2:That might be one scenario, and that was a scenario we were talking through with my client. When we broke that down, we recognized that that is exactly why she puts in a two-week plus notice. She could put in a one-month notice, three weeks, two weeks but that is what that is in place for. When she puts in that two-week to one-month notice, it gives the team some time to fill her role, and we recognize that that was really all that was holding her back from making that change. She didn't want to put other people in a pickle, she didn't want to make other people uncomfortable, but when we checked in and saw what was most in alignment. For her it was leaving when an aligned job came and giving appropriate notice to her team could make the changes and adapt the way that they needed to what expands you.
Speaker 2:Go all the way through. Play out that scenario, what I did just now. Play out that scenario. What would it look like if I hired this person? What would it look like if I didn't hire this person? What would it look like if I applied for college? I have several friends now that are going back to school, which is really neat. What would it look like if I went back to school right now? Is it something I want to do or am I shooting on myself? Play the scenario all the way out. If I hire this person and I work with them, this is the result that I believe I'm going to get and this is how I believe I'm going to feel If I say you know what? Hiring this person, this is the result I think I'm going to get and this is how I believe I'm going to feel If I break up with this person. This is the result I think I'm going to get and this is how I think I will feel If I don't break up with this person. This is the result I think I'm going to get and this is how I believe I will feel. And just ask yourself mindfully what feels the most expensive. Play the scenario all the way through.
Speaker 2:Often, when I'm working with clients, I'll ask them what their better choices are not better, but what feels most expensive to them. What they feel like the best choice is for them, for their best selves, when they connect with their goal self, their 2.0 self. That's either six months out or a year out. Whatever it is, it could be five years out when they connect with that version of themselves, and the timeline is completely arbitrary. It just helps my clients to wrap their head around the visualization. So for some of them, they can imagine their next best self in six months. For some of them they imagine it in a year. For some of them they imagine it in five years, and it's just a matter of what's easiest for you to visualize. They pick that version of themselves and we make decisions from the place of.
Speaker 2:I am that person who has the things and feels the way that I want to feel. If I am that person, what kind of decisions do I make from that place? Often, we will get stuck in the well, if I leave my job, then they're gonna be mad and that's the end of the story. But instead I want us to walk through it. Why would you leave your job right now? Well, why do you think that they might be mad? Is it okay for people to have other emotions that are not in alignment with you? My answer for you is yes. It is okay for people to feel emotions other than joy. It is okay that if, by choosing to move to another state, choose another job, choose to be single, that you could, in that process, hurt people's feelings, not even make people feel some type of way. But in you making that decision, they may decide to feel some type of way, and I would even say that lightly too.
Speaker 2:Let's paint this picture. I decided to leave a job. My boss says oh, I'm so sad about that, I'm disappointed. I really wanted you to be a part of our team. That boss.
Speaker 2:Often what we will do, especially as anxious people, is avoid that completely. I don't want to feel the feeling of a boss being disappointed in me but at the same time, you're holding this feeling. But I do want to be in a job that I love every day and I'm super excited about and pays me really well, and this is not it. So often we will not even have the conversation with the boss won't leave the job, because we're afraid of that feeling that that person might have, of disappointment, of sadness. Our brain says and this is not true but our brain will often say I can't handle it. I can't handle them feeling sad, I can't handle them feeling upset with me, I can't handle them being disappointed in me, I can't handle it. But the truth is, my friend, you can and so can they. They can handle disappointment, they can handle sadness, and so can you, and you know this Right. So this is what I mean when I say play the scenario all the way out.
Speaker 2:You play it out where you leave and your boss is disappointed, but then, in two weeks from then, you have a new job and you're on to something new. Right, flip it around. Let's say I don't leave the job. This is just a really easy example for today. Let's say I don't leave the job, okay, cool. Let's say I don't because I don't want to look for another job, I don't want to apply for something else, I don't want to tell my boss that I'm leaving. I don't have that hard conversation. Cool, that's absolutely an option. Let's say you don't leave.
Speaker 2:Then what If your reality is that I want to be in a job where I feel fulfilled, excited, and I'm not right now, then you're. Then what, from that place, we can assume is that you're going to continue to go to a job on a day-to-day basis that doesn't fully fulfill you, because you would rather be in uncomfortable discomfort rather than go through the discomfort to get what you really want. Or, I'm sorry, comfortable discomfort I misspoke Comfortable discomfort is that zone of well, I'm uncomfortable, but I know what to expect. I'm not a job I don't really like, but I know what to expect from my boss. I know what to expect from my paycheck. I know what to expect from my deliverables every single week. It's not super exciting. I don't really like it. I'm not really jacked about it and I'm not saying that these are necessary for your full-time job. You get to decide what's important to you, for your work and for your career, but I'm just using this as an example. We could assume that then you would go through living comfortably in discomfort rather than going through the discomfort of getting what you really want. And that happens all the time and I say that without judgment it makes sense.
Speaker 2:The brain says I would rather be comfortable, I would rather know what to expect. I would rather be in comfortable discomfort rather than making myself step into discomfort for uncertainty. That's how the brain often will paint our goals. I don't actually know if, by me taking the step, I'm going to accomplish my goals, and so that will keep us from making a decision. I don't know. I don't know if I post on Instagram every single day, if I'm really going to get to 10,000 followers. I don't know if I'm going to roll on this course on social media strategies, if I'm ever going to really grow and monetize on social media. Is it actually going to work? This will keep us from showing up. This will keep us from taking action.
Speaker 2:So here's my last little tip for you have your own back. Have your own back. It might not work out. I want to start there. It might not work out. You might visualize it. You might say your affirmations, you might go over and over again, you might step into the energy, and then you might take on a first client or take on a role or take on a new job and hate it. You might hate it or it might not go the way you think it's going to go. You might launch a new program and it doesn't go well. You might sign up for that Instagram course and you don't get any information out of it. It might happen.
Speaker 2:Your job is to have your own back, regardless. Your job is to stay connected to your vision. What is it that you want and, therefore, how is it that you want to feel that is your job? And then your job is to take action as best as you can. We do our best until we know better, and then we do that. We do our best. I'm going to say it again for whoever needed to hear it again we do our best until we know better, and then we do that. Do your best and have your own back and know that I might post every day and only have three more followers in the next 30 days If that's the case, we get to look at strategy.
Speaker 2:We get to look at what is it that is working, what is it that's not working Right? Then we get to dig in, but you have to start. I love so many people love that Nike saying just do it, because it's so true. Get out of comfortable discomfort. Step into discomfort. Have your own back that you can be uncomfortable. Have your own back that you can do hard things. Have your own back that the goal, the dream, the desire that's been placed on your heart, placed in your mind, is possible in the world period. And it might not get there. You might not get there in the way that you anticipate. We usually don't. We usually don't, my friends. That's not the point. The point is that you are connected to your vision and your goal and that, even if you get turned down for that job, even if you don't sign a client, even if you sign up for that course and don't get the result you think you're going to get, you are so capable of creating and having success, exactly as you see it. And here's the other thing as you're making decisions, that goal may shift.
Speaker 2:As you go to start the podcast, you might realize oh, I don't actually like podcasting. I just did this because I felt like I needed to do it. I personally love podcasting. Love it, it's so much fun. I love talking, it's great.
Speaker 2:Not everybody does Right, you might try something out and find out. This is not for me, this is not a good fit, and then that's a whole podcast episode for another time, because the brain goes into a tizzy of like I thought this was it. I thought this is what I wanted to do. Now I'm out here doing it and I don't like it Fudge. What do I do now? That's okay. Have your own back. Have your own back. Have your own back. Know that again, the desires that have been placed on your heart and in your mind are possible in the world. And if you go to chase those desires not even chase those desires, but attract those desires show up in the world as a person who has those desires in their life and find that some of those things aren't actually in alignment for you. You saw it in a magazine, you saw other people doing it. You thought you would try it on and it wasn't for you. That's okay. That is a part of the process. It's a part of growing, it's a part of expanding. It's a part of becoming. It's trying on things In the same way.
Speaker 2:I love this example. You use it all the time. You go to the store, you try on a sweater. It's not for you. We don't make it a big deal. You're just like I don't really like this color. This is really itchy. I don't really like it. You take it off, you put something else on. Let's see if we can apply that lightness to some of our goals. You might feel very, very important to get that job but also play with it.
Speaker 2:In that all of this is temporary, right, you can always try things on. It's okay if you don't like something, just like sometimes we don't like certain ice cream flavors right, it's not a big deal. It's totally okay if you don't like pistachio, if you don't like strawberry ice cream right. And you like chocolate chip, mango, I totally made that up. But if that's what you really like, great, that's not a problem. Stop making what you like a problem. It is not a problem that you like what you like. It is not a problem that it might take some time to get there. It's not a problem that you might fail on the way there. It's not a problem if you need to change your mind. Stop making these things into problems. They are impeding your decision-making process.
Speaker 2:What I want for you is to connect to the version of you that you most desire to be and that is usually at the heart of it a feeling Go through all. You can name all the stuff, right. I want to be a speaker. I want to be a world traveler. I want to be married with three kids. That's great. How is that life going to make you feel? That's what it comes down to. It's going to make you feel expansive, empowered, like a boss, confident. How is it going to make you feel?
Speaker 2:Your job is to step into one, if not all of those feelings, one at a time. If you're at the beginning of this, right, you're like I want to feel confident and empowered, loved all these things. Okay, choose one. I want to feel confident. Great. What does that mean to you, first and foremost? Does that mean that you're dressing differently? Does that mean that you speak differently? Does that mean that you think about yourself differently? Is it a combination of those things? Okay, fantastic, clarify that.
Speaker 2:And then, from that place, how do you show up? If that's who you are in the world? Or you even apply to a course, you do anything right. Get clear on what you want. Get clear on what you want and how you want to feel, because that's all that truly matters at the end of the day. You're cranky right now and your brain says it's because I don't have the rays that I want, and when I get the rays that I want, I'm going to feel empowered and like a boss. Your job is to feel empowered and like a boss ahead of time. When you do that, you create results. You create new results. When you show up from comfortable discomfort, you're going to create the same results. You can't expect new results doing the same things, my friends, and that's what we're talking about decision making today. If you've been getting the same results, it is time to make some new decisions so you can get some new results. And guess what? If you're uncomfortable on that, you're doing it right. Good job, right.
Speaker 2:I'm not here to say that chasing your dreams is easy. Not at all. I'm not here to say that it's hard either, but I'm here to say that it's possible. I'm here to say that it is doable. I'm here to say that you don't need to put so much pressure on yourself, that it's about taking one step at a time, in alignment with your best self. That is it One step, one decision at a time, in alignment with your best self. That will take practice and your best self will change.
Speaker 2:Who I thought my best self was five years ago is different than who I think my best self is now, and that is okay. We're humans, human-ing, doing our very best and I need you to remember that. My friend, if you can, I give that to you. You're doing your best, you are doing your best and when you know better, we will do that. As always, take what sticks to you. Leave the rest, my friends.
Speaker 2:Come, follow me on Instagram at nondiecom, come and sign up for a discovery call If you're ready.
Speaker 2:I have some new packages I'm going to be rolling out. Part of me is like is this the last episode of 2023? I just love it so much. I'm like maybe that's a change. Maybe I don't do seasons anymore, but for now, for now, my friends, this is the last episode of 2023, and of season five. I hope that it served you. I hope you have a beautiful rest of your year. Maybe I'll sneak a little bonus episode in before the end of the year and I'll see you in 2024. Hey friend, if you like this podcast, I would love it if you could give us a five star rating. Share it with your friends, share it with somebody another girl, boss, babe that you know is grinding, showing up as her best self, and can maybe use some support on her way. If you're interested in one-on-one coaching, if this podcast resonates with you and you're ready for some one-on-one support support for you and your journey go ahead to nondekamealcom to learn more or head over to nondekamealasme to sign up for your free discovery call. I'll see you soon, queen.