Inspired with Nika Lawrie

Empowering Autistic Children Through Food and Fun with Gary Martinez

April 02, 2024 • Nika Lawrie • Season 2024 • Episode 68

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When Gary's world turned upside down after his daughter Monica was diagnosed with autism, he discovered that the key to unlocking her potential was as simple as a swing in the park or a balanced meal on the dinner table. Join us as we walk through Gary's life—a fitness trainer and massage therapist turned advocate for autism awareness—unraveling the intricacies of parenting a child with special needs. Through his story, we unearth how physical activities and diet can dramatically influence a child's development, behavior, and ability to thrive both at home and in school.

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Nika Lawrie:

Welcome to the Inspired with Nika Lawrie podcast. Gary, welcome to the show. How are you today?

Gary Martinez:

Doing pretty good. Thank you so much for having me on.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, I'm so excited to have a really cool conversation with you and learn all kinds of cool things. So before we deep dive into it, can you tell me a little bit about yourself? You have kind of a fascinating story with your daughter and what you do to help other people. So share, share all the goodness.

Gary Martinez:

Okay, so I'm a fitness trainer and I also have a massage background. I was a massage therapist at one time and I'm a father of two. I have a son named Christian who is 11. Well, he's going to be 12 on the 20th. And, uh, I have a daughter named Monica. She is a 16 years old and, um, let's see. So I'm also a book author for autism and right now I'm creating a different program to work with our kids that are obsessed with like pretend play and that they lack proper nutrition and daily movements. So I'm starting that out where I'm just going to work with them, kind of one-on-one, and then kind of get some good feedback as to how to connect that into a program for our children.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely. It's such a it's such an important thing. I think nowadays, you know so many of our kids are living off of fast food and you know, heavy sugar, high processed foods, and then sitting and playing video games and I know I sound like an old person, you're watching too much TV but I think the lack of movement and the lack of imagination, creativity, can be a real issue for kids too, just to, you know, expand their mindset and just think of new things and be creative and have fun with that.

Nika Lawrie:

So I'm excited to see what you create. In that sense.

Gary Martinez:

Awesome. Yeah, that's so true though.

Nika Lawrie:

So you so can you talk a little bit about your daughter too? I know she has kind of an interesting story and I want to deep dive into that a little bit.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, so my daughter, Monica, roughly around four years old, was diagnosed with autism and also a sensory processing disorder. So when we were diagnosed I was like what, what are you know? What are these words? I felt like, you know, I felt like a failure in the beginning because my daughter, she couldn't talk, she couldn't talk. Back then it took a little while before she's she was able to talk. So because of that she couldn't express herself and she would have these meltdowns where she would commit physical harm to herself, she would throw herself on the ground and she would scream, she would turn red, she would cry, she couldn't express what she wanted to do. So that was a big struggle for her.

Gary Martinez:

But then we got our first steps, which was intervention, which was going to two therapies, one being occupational therapy, which helps out with that, uh, sensory part as far as making their, their body, uh, start to learn how to do things, Um, so it can connect a little better with the brain as a team, Uh, and then we also had speech therapy in that same building and that was to kind of help like get the, get the jaw, the muscles, finally, you know something that's going to help us out. So you had like three choices if you wanted to to drop your kid off, wait in the waiting room or go in person. So I went in person and that's how I learned and I started to implement all those tools at home to to turn that corner.

Nika Lawrie:

I commend you for going in person, Cause it's's you know, a lot of parents would just find it, as you know, an extra task that they have to do, but being involved with that and learning and figuring out ways to really support your child is phenomenal, so I commend you for going.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, thank you.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, so tell me a little bit about the kind of brain-body coordination my mom she's retired now but she was an occupational therapist for years and just loved it and still to this day talks about all of her amazing clients and all kinds of cool things that she got to do and interacting with them. And can you tell me a little bit about what that process was like and what your guys' takeaways were?

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, like you know when we first started, like she has you know when we first started, like she has my dog, she has this low muscle tone which comes with it a lot of our kids, so it just means that they don't have the strength or the energy to do things or to or to coordination, you know, like, like doing a button, trying to button up your shirt, trying to hold a toothbrush to brush your teeth, trying to hold a utensil tie your shoes, those kinds of things like that. But then we started to learn, like, what are some of the things that help her out? And her first thing that she really grabbed a hold of, and still does to this day, is swinging. So swinging, we were swinging in this kind of like a sock, like material, and she got the pressure that her body needed, you know, and made her feel uh, calm and uh, those type of ways and the, the motion of it rocking back and forth just gave her this awareness that she needed.

Gary Martinez:

So I was definitely taking notes on everything. So swinging was number one, just a few few more of the other things was was sitting in a pit of balls with the plastic balls and you sit in them again. It's that pressure that your body needs. And then another one was was just bouncing, bouncing up to the sky, pretty much having so much fun on a trampoline. Another good, uh, full body, uh, exercise. I just kind of that started to bring her to life. Yeah, so, uh, like your, like your mom, I am still uh, obsessed with, with occupational therapy and all those sorts of activities because they still, to this day, help us out. It's just that we now have evolved and there's different activities that we do, but you get to be creative and help your child out with it.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, I love it. I think you know PTs get all the glitz and glam, but the occupational therapists are I mean, they are magic people. They do so many incredible things with these children and people you know, figuring out how to use their bodies in a unique way. So it's a cool profession and I really commend what they do too.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, definitely.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, definitely so. So before we started recording today, we were talking a little bit via email and you'd shared with me that you had really made, um uh, a decision to change the diet for your daughter and the type of food and nutrition you were feeding her. Can you kind of elaborate on one? What sparked you to want to make a change and then, what kind of change did you make sparked?

Gary Martinez:

you to want to make a change. And then what kind of change did you make? Yeah, so I started to notice that, um, monica would start to have like meltdowns, and it was being triggered by by foods. Like after something she would eat, I would notice that she would get really hyper or she would go the other direction and she would have no energy and then and then those things throughout the day would kind of take a toll on her where she didn't get the best sleep. So for me it was like, okay, I'm in the field of fitness, so I'm going to find a nutritionist. So I went to do that right away and started to learn. You know, here are some foods you may want to take out and here are some foods that you want to start adding to help out with that energy, to improve that behavior and to be able to sleep better at night. So I was eager to do that and then started to follow that and like kind of track it, like kind of log things that were helpful and things that were not helpful.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, so I mean that's a huge thing. I always tell people, I tell them track food, mood and poop and then also sleep and energy levels, like how they feel throughout the day. And it's incredible, once you start really looking at the um you know the, the data over, you know even a week, but especially over two or three months, you can see direct correlations to what we're eating and how we feel and how our body reacts to things. And so it's so. I love that you tracked it. That's such a big thing. Um, what were some of the? What were some of the swaps that you made, like what did you remove and what did you add in?

Gary Martinez:

Okay. So her very first thing that she was like addicted to which a lot of kids do do get is to chicken nuggets. It's like you know the taste and all this stuff that goes with it. No-transcript Um, and and some other, some other foods also, um, were like troublemakers for us.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah. What did you add in in place of them?

Gary Martinez:

Okay. So what we added in it was interesting. So like, as Monica started to talk, you know, when she got to that point later on I started to learn what her special interests were. So how, what she likes. I wanted to know what she likes so we can start to build that bond and connection. So she's really heavily into to this day still into Disney princesses or Disney female characters in the movies, like Alice in Wonderland. We'll say yeah.

Gary Martinez:

So Alice in Wonderland, like one day I was like you know how, even though we went to a session for nutrition, how can I start to get her to try out a new food? So for me I had to get, you know, creative, had to put on that creative cap. So I was like, okay, it just came, it just came to me, I didn't even have to think about it, which is sometimes the best methods that help out. So for me I said hold on a second. Alice has blonde hair. A banana is yellow. So I said, hey, monica, you know what? I want Alice to keep that beautiful blonde hair. So I'm going to start eating bananas for her every single day. So shortly after that, monica said me too. And for the first time she tried her first fruit and that kind of opened a door to trying new foods, so that that spark right there helped her to eat different foods and then that that started to change her, her behaviors, her energy, her sleep and all sorts of things like that.

Nika Lawrie:

Man, what a cool, just super simple but like really creative way to. I mean you could use that for any kid, not not specifically someone with autism, but really anyone. So what a cool idea.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, and now just really quickly to plug in she, she now eats foods for those specific characters, like, or I'm eating this, I'm eating this for this person, this for this person. So now it's it's like game on and, uh, just you know, sitting back, it's it's like, wow, amazed that she has that. She is doing at it. She's the most healthy she is right now because of that.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely that's. That is awesome. I love that little tip and just the. What a good idea, so good job. Yeah, so tell me so you. You saw her energy improve, you saw she had better mood, and then you also mentioned that she retained more information after changing her diet. Can you elaborate on that, like, what kind of information was she retaining and how did her mood, energy, change?

Gary Martinez:

OK. So, like in the beginning when we started going to school, like preschool, we couldn't even handle a half a day. And then kindergarten was kind of the same, because we're having these, these behavior issues. But when we started to implement those, you know a little bit of the later elementary grades is where we really start started being more consistent with our new foods. Um, she started out with uh, they would give her a half a half a list of spelling words. We couldn't get them, but we practiced and we kept doing our routines with activity and food, and then shortly after that, she started to get those half of the words correct. And then later on she got 100%, the entire list, just like the same class, and she started to retain things such as spelling. And then she started to carry over to now she's a good reader and she can remember better parts of the story, whatever it is that she's reading.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, that's so cool. I think people really underestimate the power of food and nutrition and our brain function and what our brain is able to do or not do, based off of the type of nutrients we're putting into our body. So it's a perfect example of how important that stuff is.

Gary Martinez:

Oh yeah, I was just like, wow, I take another step back that she's doing those things. And then, like I said, she's evolved, where now her social piece has improved, with wanting to talk to kids or teachers in our classroom and even helping out Cause she has a big car even helping out the less fortunate kids in our classroom that may have a, a feeding tube, or they're in a wheelchair or or they just need a little bit more, uh, extra help.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah.

Gary Martinez:

And she's like, like I help her, kind of like a, like a, like a teacher aid in the room.

Nika Lawrie:

Oh, that's so cute. That's awesome. I love that she does that. So it sounds like this was kind of a. It wasn't just like an overnight shift. It was kind of a gradual process, getting her to eat different foods and try different foods. Did you find that it was really challenging or difficult, or did you find that, you know, using your creative tools like connecting the food to the characters, was it easier than you thought it was going to be to make these changes?

Gary Martinez:

Um, it started out. You know, it was a struggle where everything started out as a as a big struggle and everything just took time.

Gary Martinez:

The most important thing is to have the ultimate patience and understanding that that it's going to take time for them and to just continue to be consistent with your support and, uh, you know the results will come, but it's just more like enjoy the process, so, um, and then fast forward to now where it's it's more simple and she, she's open to eating more foods. And even now I've been step-by-step trainer where now she can, uh, she can, um, put all the ingredients in a smoothie and I'll even give her a stopwatch and she'll time it because she likes it. At one minute is the right consistency for her, because it's all about details and routine.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, and probably that texture too yeah.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, yeah, all that.

Nika Lawrie:

Oh, that's so cool. I love that you've been so kind of like detail oriented with figuring all these things out with her just so it fits her personal needs and desires and comfort level.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, it makes me be accountable too. It's like you know, cause old me, you know I would quit a lot of things in life. But, learning from Monica as as as she's a teacher to me, it taught me how to be a better person, have more integrity, be more accountable, have better self-discipline, because somebody depends on you, but you also got to take care of yourself first.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, man, I love that. You know, I, I, I, I work and see with I see a lot of people with some type of disability or or unique ability in that sense, and so often you see in society that people are like, well, you know what, what can they give? Like, what are, what is their contribution to, to society and the community? And really, when you start to talk to the family members and the parents of these individuals, they give so much, they bring so much to other people's lives, and so I think that's a perfect example of of that situation.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, I mean that's the right thing to do in the world right now is to give back, to put in that that type of positive energy in the world so it can turn into a ripple effect. And Monica does that, she. She's also very creative, she's an artist Like she. She draws a lot and she makes projects and gives gifts to people.

Nika Lawrie:

That's awesome. I love that. I love how big of a heart she is. I want to meet her. Yeah, that's awesome. So so, changing the diet for Monica did that have an impact on your diet or the kind of the household as a whole and, and if so, were there positive repercussions of that that you saw?

Gary Martinez:

it was the biggest game changer yet in our life. It's like we started our, our change together as a family. So I have Monica here where I live and my son lives two hours away with his mom, but I've coordinated parenting time so I can have both of them a lot together and his mom's really good about that. So for us, we started in September of 2019, together with with our diet changes, and prior to that year, that month, you know, we used to get the common like cold cough, pain in the ear, yeah, the normal type of kind of cold type symptoms, like consistently, at least I want to say once or twice a month. But when we made our change and started to take out foods and eat some different foods, we haven't really had a symptom like that since we started.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, yeah, isn't that incredible? Like we, we start to understand, you know, like we start to understand, you know about. 70% of our immune system sits in our gut, in our microbiome, and feeding that microbiome real food, real nutrients, the fiber it needs, all the phytochemicals, all the things that are really important to our system. Once we feed it to them, the system starts working better, and so we can fight off those common colds and other issues that we normally struggle with.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, because you know, when we were younger and prior to that, that our new change Monica did have a sensitive stomach and would have some of those you know issues, but the changes just started to change all that. It starts with change. You have to want to change to make that change. So I um, you know, I just felt good about it and, uh, it's just been a good thing ever since.

Nika Lawrie:

I love that. Have you and um, your son and everyone in the family felt better? Do you guys have more energy too?

Gary Martinez:

Oh my gosh, like I used to have. Like I didn't start eating better until, honestly, consistently, in 2019. Like, as a trainer, I started the process but I wasn't aware. I didn't know as much as I do now back then, so I wasn't consistent with that. So all those years of me growing up, I was never taught about nutrition or anything like that. So I suffered a lot of different things in my life and I've overcome the majority of those. I think I've pretty much got them all, for the most part, out of my system thanks to committing to a better diet and a healthy lifestyle for us, to a better diet and a healthy lifestyle for us.

Nika Lawrie:

That's phenomenal, that is so awesome. I you know so many of us, you know. I even see it especially like in the fitness world, where you know you have these personal trainers and people that look super fit and, you know, have these incredible bodies, but they haven't had the opportunity to learn about nutrition and kind of lifestyle habits too, in the sense of sleeping and and um things outside of you know, I'm I'm being generalized here, but eating protein drinks or something. You know what I mean. Your, your, your chicken and your broccoli, kind of thing, Once you you know so many of them look healthy.

Nika Lawrie:

But when you really deep dive, you find out that they're struggling. And it's unfortunate because the reality is this information isn't being shared with people very often, like it's not taught to us in school, it's not taught to us in most physical fitness programs that you know. It's something that you have to go out and choose to deep dive into and learn on your own.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, you have to, you have to really invest in yourself to do that. Like it's just what you said, like there's a lot of people with very, very on the outside very put together physiques, but on the inside you don't know that they're suffering at they, that they have, they may have, a chronic illness is because they don't. You know it's not their fault, but they just don't know what's going on inside there and it's the inside. It's the inside part that's the most important.

Nika Lawrie:

know what's going on inside there and it's the inside, it's the inside part that's the most important Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah, you see a lot of them that they'll end up having some type of um like endocrine, some type of hormone issue. They have autoimmune issues, they have digestive issues and it's because they're just not getting all the nutrients and stuff that they need.

Gary Martinez:

So yeah, right.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, so we've talked a lot about your, your daughter, and it's her relationship to changing her diet food. Are there other tools? Um, you know you mentioned, um the OTs and stuff, but are there other tools that you've come across that have been really beneficial, that have helped you guys along your journey?

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, so, uh, to this day, um, we've been doing, um, some form of exercise or play activities. You know, ot and like my world. Together we kind of we've been doing some form of exercise or play activities. You know, ot and like my world. Together we kind of we created our own flavor and we added that. We added that that fun of her character is that that encourages her to do it.

Gary Martinez:

So for me, my analogy is you know, when you go to the gym, if you warm up, you're more prepared, you're going to have a better performance in your workout. So our, our thing has been ever since the elementary grades was we would go to the school about 20 minutes early and do our little warmup routine to prepare and organize her brain and body for the chaos of all the stuff that goes on in school, so she would be able to be more calm and withstand and cope and have a better performance in school. So we would hit the playground and push her on a swing. So swing, swing again. We would swing and do other things to work different parts of the body. That's important for her.

Gary Martinez:

But when we were swinging a lot, because that's her strength, is where I would add in like facts of life or school, where one moment we're singing a song and and then our change the channel because she's so alert and happy, swinging, that our, our started doing like, hey, what's two plus two, we'll add a little math, or our do something like that to add some additional value, to take advantage of her being in a good state. So for us it's been doing a play routine up to today and now that we're evolving and I've learned more about myself this past year is mindset is to know how to. If we can control our mind better than let the mind control you, then we're more in charge of ourselves, our emotions, our fears, and turn that around and be more happy in life. Absolutely, I love that around and be more happy in life.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely. I love that. Have you found that she is able to, you know, think of mindset as a tool? Is it something that she's able to kind of slow down and kind of process enough.

Gary Martinez:

She's learning right now. It's more of a. We do need a lot of cues throughout the day, reminders. So it's just, you know, we'll sit down and we'll just have a conversation, and I've built that part where we're open and she, you know we can trust each other, talk about anything, and if she's not having a great moment or just listen, give her, give her the mic, and then we'll we'll work on solving the problem. So we that for that part we have to work together.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, yeah, no, that absolutely makes sense, but it's, it's awesome that you know, you're, you're kind of giving her those tools to. You know, kind of learn and use and the sense of slowing down and thinking about it and kind of working through the problem, and so it's super cool.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, and the most important thing is like doing it together with your child, because now you're in arena and you're doing it with them, so you can you can get the same the effect and see what what that feels like.

Gary Martinez:

So, like, real quickly, I'll share. One tool that we did the other day was we stood up nice and tall, and I learned this from one of my mentors is you stand up nice and tall and close your eyes and if you're having like some negative thoughts or something that's you know, causing that to you is you want to turn real slow, so don't get dizzy. Start to turn real slow, with your eyes closed, counterclockwise, and say what all those bad emotions are, so you want to exhaust them, make them tired, so they want to leave your body, and then, when that's done, uh, eyes closed, nice and tall, now you start to turn clockwise, real slow, so you don't get dizzy and say all the good things about yourself. Whatever that is Like. Maybe for me it's like I am a good parent, I am going to get more clients, I am going to have a great run today, whatever that is and that shifts your, your mindset and your mentality.

Nika Lawrie:

Damn, that's such a that's a cool tool for anybody, anybody, during the day throughout. Yeah, I mean, I I kind of do sometimes the same thing where I'll stand up tall and I'll actually just kind of use my hands to push it out. You know, I'm for the listeners, I'm putting my hands kind of around my chest area with the palms out to the open and and really just pushing them, pushing those bad thoughts away and and I know it sounds kind of woo but it's it's in a sense your own way of like releasing the bad juju.

Nika Lawrie:

You know getting those demons out and pushing them away, getting rid of that bad energy. And so I I love the spinning tool. It's such a cool idea.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, that's a good one too, what you just talked about.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, so this has been a phenomenal conversation. I'm I'm so grateful for the opportunity to connect with you and learn about your daughter and her journey as well. I have a couple quick fire kind of rapid questions for you, but before I get to that, I want to know is there anything specific that you want to share that we haven't already touched?

Gary Martinez:

on. I would just say we need more acceptance in this world right now, especially for kids who have autism or special needs, like you know. When they're out in the public and it looks like they're going through a hard time, and someone may not get it like if they're, you know, rocking back and forth excessively or doing something like that. We have to understand that. You know they're doing that for a reason. A lot of times it's their natural way to ask for help rather than to be judged. It's just to learn how to accept people that are different in our society and especially if there's a parent right there and you see they're going through hard times, you can always ask. There's something you can do to help, because you may make a friend, you may help solve a problem in a day and your reward is what you just did to help somebody and and their reward is, you know, uh, you helped them out. So it's just uh, just um, having that acceptance and wanting to to help a person out in this world, to make an impact.

Nika Lawrie:

I'm so glad you shared that. I love that. I think especially people need to understand. I think that I may be slightly off here, but I think the statistic is it's like one in five children are being diagnosed with autism. I mean it's it's a large percentage of the population now and you know and, and autism, and, and there's lots of other you know dynamic health issues that people are struggling with. And being kind and compassionate and and um giving and generous towards those people, put yourself in their shoes, is so, so important.

Gary Martinez:

Yeah, that's well said yeah.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, awesome. So okay, are you ready for the quick fire questions? Sure, okay. So the very first one is what is your favorite or most impactful book?

Gary Martinez:

your favorite or most impactful book, podcast or documentary, and why Um book it's uh, can't hurt me by David Goggins.

Gary Martinez:

Um so for the past year, that the past year, I've been following David Goggins to give me, uh, that, that what I need to, to get my budding gear as far as my, my mindset, to be more control of myself and to give that, um, just all those tools that he shares with you. So I listened to his podcast. He doesn't have a podcast, but he's interviewed on podcasts, so I listened to different influencers who have them on and, reading this book, that's been like the best tool from this year.

Nika Lawrie:

That book changed last year.

Gary Martinez:

I want to say yeah yeah, that book was.

Nika Lawrie:

I mean, his story is unbelievable. So yeah, it's, it's such a good one. I'm glad you brought that one up. I think I don't think it was David that said it, but I always think of um discipline equals freedom when I think about him. I think it may have been another ranger or someone that said that, but that's what I always think about with Dagen.

Gary Martinez:

So one of those guys.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, right, yeah, okay. Next question for you what is your best toxin-free or eco-friendly living tip?

Gary Martinez:

Ah, that's a good one, toxin-free. Let me think here for a second Cause there's so many good answers for that yeah free. I'm just going to keep it simple, like a pimple and just say um, at least once, once a day, eat a piece of fruit, because a piece of fruit is is good at going into the body and help to start get rid of toxic stuff that's inside there, turns into like a little broom and starts to sweep away.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely. I love that. That's a great one Simple, easy to do and it tastes good too.

Gary Martinez:

So pick your favorite one.

Nika Lawrie:

Great yeah, okay. Last question for you is what does living consciously mean to you?

Gary Martinez:

What comes to me right now is living in the moment, because your brain understands right now. It doesn't understand the future. So just be conscious in the moment with what you're doing, so you can enjoy the moments and be able to focus on what you're doing.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, yeah, I definitely agree. You know, we're always trying to build out the future and, and you know, think it, think it into reality. But the reality is right now and if we work on different things in the moment, our, our future is whatever we want it to be.

Gary Martinez:

Right.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, love it. Well, gary, this has been phenomenal. I am so grateful for the opportunity to connect with you. Thank you so much for coming on the show.

Gary Martinez:

Thank you so much for having me Appreciate it.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely.

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