They Call Me Mista Yu: You Can Have It All

Ever wondered why some people effortlessly build meaningful connections while others struggle? Tune in to this week's episode of They Call Me Mista Yu
 to uncover the secrets behind the power of authenticity in networking and business. We start by sending our heartfelt thanks to all our loyal listeners who've supported us through thick and thin, helping our podcast thrive globally. We then share some personal stories that highlight the importance of staying genuine in both public and private spheres. As we reflect on our journeys, we dive into the role of a connector, emphasizing how offering assistance and insights, while staying true to one’s roots, can make all the difference.

In another intriguing segment, we bring you a compelling tale of a young entrepreneur whose public persona didn’t match his private actions, revealing the pitfalls of such misalignment. This story serves as a vivid reminder that consistent effort and genuine application of knowledge

Thank you for listening to the All Purpose Pod for an All Purpose Life and your Weekly Mirror Check before you go change the world! You can find and subscribe to our show on our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@Theycallmemistayu

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Follow us Monday-Thursday on our Youtube, Facebook, IG, Linked In, and X platforms @theycallmemistayu. For audio listeners, TCMMY is everywhere you enjoy your podcasts. 

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:49

Thank you, welcome back to the All Purpose Pod for an all-purpose life. Wherever you are, however, you are listening to the Call Me, mr U the podcast. Thank you again for making us a part of your morning, your day and your week. We're your weekly mirror. Check before you go change the world, baby. You can find us on Facebook, instagram, youtube, tiktok and, of course, the Twitter. Thank you for downloading and subscribing to our YouTube channel on youtubecom at theycallmemisteryou, and, of course, if you're listening audio-wise and not video Pandora, spotify, iheartradio, apple Podcasts Wherever you subscribe to your streaming podcast, you can find our show. They call me, mr U the podcast. Thank you again for helping us with this incredible mission that we're on right now. Just a little aside right now for you guys that are listening and watching our episode for today, just want to say thank you guys. Seriously, you guys have been doing a fantastic job of riding with us.

Speaker 1: 1:46

We started the show in probably one of the worst times in our country's history and somehow I say by the grace of God, but somehow this show has survived. We've evolved, excuse me have turned into something that people are looking for. They listen to us when they're jogging, when they're exercising at the gym, when they're doing laundry, when they're sitting at home and they're getting ready to go to bed at night and when you wake up in the morning, they're listening to and watching the Call Me, mr U the podcast. So we thank you again for the support. Of course, we got a long way to go to get you some of the goals that we have set for ourselves. That will allow us to do more and accomplish more. But our podcast is being heard literally worldwide and that's very sobering that we're not only around the country, which we are, but we're worldwide. I think there's more people listening to us out in the country than in the West Coast in their entirety. It's very sobering to see that we're reaching so many people. Thank you again for supporting us during our show. Also, I'll be drinking all natural energy throughout the course of this show, so just bear with me If I get a little tickled. I'll be using this to kind of help me get lubricated, all right, but beside that, thank you again for all that you're doing with our show and supporting us and supporting me personally and my family. It means a lot to us and we thank you.

Speaker 1: 3:16

There are a lot of things that we talk about on the course of this journey that we're on with the Call Me, mr Uter podcast. Of course you can find us anywhere we are literally everywhere but we talk about a lot of things that are close to my heart, because not just for me to gripe into me, to have a platform to abuse anybody or complain. If you listen to our show at all, you know that's not what we're doing. Our goal is to inspire and encourage and, of course, enlighten at the same time as we can. I grow every episode that we have. I learned something from it. So I know, hearing your comments and your texts and emails to me and just when you see me in the marketplaces, what you're saying. You're letting me know that it means something to you what we're talking about and it's touching your life. You know what? Thank you. That means a whole lot to me, more than I can tell you in the course of this episode today. I'll do my best, but words can't say enough. But one thing that I've noticed, and because I probably noticed it for a couple of reasons One, because a lot of what I do in the business world is about networking. It's about connection with other people that I know and some that I don't know. It's really about perhaps enlightening them on something new. Of course it's trying to find out where they are and see how I can connect them and how I can potentially help them.

Speaker 1: 4:38

My wife and I consider ourselves connectors. We met somebody in the marketplace today. As a matter of fact, we didn't have any plans, there was no agenda. It looked like he needed help in the store that we were in and we had some knowledge about what he was looking at. We helped him. We gave him some ideas, showed him some pictures, just gave him some creative ideas on how to do what he was doing, and we helped him do that. Nothing more to it than that. It was just that simple. But what I learned in that is that we're connectors and we help wherever we have the ability to help, where we have the insight and the knowledge or somebody that we can introduce them to or information that we can provide for them. We do that because that's what we do.

Speaker 1: 5:27

But in the course of doing that, you run into a lot of people who, although their public persona doesn't match their private persona, if that makes sense what they show you publicly doesn't match what's actually going on privately. You see me death diving my New York gear. I'm repping my Yankees. I'm going to do that. Don't hate on me.

Speaker 1: 5:51

I grew up in an all-New York household so of course I rooted for the Mets growing up. I rooted for the New York Jets growing up. You ain't going to catch me wearing none of that. I've been a Yankees fan the longest and that's who I am. That's who I represent. But when you see me in the streets, it's not different. What you're seeing right now is what you get then too. I'm from New York, it's my hometown. I talk like that. I act in some ways in that respect. I'm not hiding anything from you guys. When you're not in front of me, I talk the same way to you guys out there in the streets, like I would right here in my office. It's no different, because I want my public and my private persona to match. I want to be a different person because I'm in front of different people. That's a problem that we have in our community, in our network, in our world. People are showing you one thing but something else is going on, and it's really a scary proposition.

Speaker 1: 6:52

I think most of the scariest movies you've ever seen in your life. I'll just speak for myself. The scariest movies I've ever seen in my life it's not the ones that are the gory, the ones that have the most bloodshed the hack-em-up movies. The hack-em-ups aren't the scariest thing to me, it's not that. It's the one where people look like they're with you but then you find out they're not, and you find out too late that they weren't really on your side. When I watch crime dramas and things like that which I don't do very often, but I do enjoy them those are the twists and turns that I get with them most. I'm like, wow, you thought that person was on your side and they just flipped on you, betrayed you and they were going through all this journey, all this time, throughout the course of the weeks and months and years, being depicted in the movie or the TV show, and you find out they weren't with you because their prior persona wasn't the same as what they were showing you for us. We need to deal with it. It's a real thing.

Speaker 1: 8:02

There's an episode that we did in season three on this show. It's actually episode number 35. It is called the Emancipation of Busy. The Emancipation of Busy. I highly recommend you go and check that out. It's about 27 minutes long. I don't want to take too much of your time up. It's in season three of our show, episode number 35, the emancipation of busy. I definitely strongly encourage you to check it out for a lot of reasons, but because of what we're talking about today, you definitely want to hear this.

Speaker 1: 8:39

One of the things that I learned about people in the marketplaces, in the areas where we connect and network, is that, again, their public persona doesn't match their private persona. They tell you they can do this or that, but they really can't, and in their private places they don't. For example, one of the things that we do and I go into a lot about what we do in business, because it's not really the whole point here I want to just give you a little bit of a snippet One thing that we do our business is successful because we follow a model of successful people who have done what we aspire to do and they've been successful at it. So why not duplicate what's already been done? That has worked right? It's just common sense. Nothing new, no new age philosophy here, just common sense. If somebody has been successful at doing it in the past, follow that pattern, attach yourself to that model and you too can do the same thing and achieve a similar or even a greater level of success. It's just pretty simple to follow. But one of the things I love about what we do in the community that we are part of is that we foster an environment of personal development. It's not just, oh, do what I do. There's some aspects where you've got to grow like I've grown. You've got to read like I've read. You got to listen the way I've listened. You got to apply the way I've applied. It's not just, oh, try to make a cookie cutter model of what I've done. No, you got to follow that in the private persona as well as the public one everybody can see, in the private persona as well as the public one that everybody can see. And there's a couple of examples. I'll just give you one.

Speaker 1: 10:25

I met a young man, an aspiring entrepreneur. He had on a nice little suit. You can tell the suit wasn't expensive, but I don't judge him for that. He was doing the best he could on the budget he was working with, but he had a little suit on a tie. His hair was cut. Well, he was out there in the streets because he's an entrepreneur. He was out here trying to build something for himself and for his family, and got a number of love for him During the course of our conversation.

Speaker 1: 10:57

I asked him a question that I asked everybody that I meet for the first time that shows any interest in wanting to do what we do or get some tips or how to do some things to help them in their endeavors Entrepreneurially. I asked the question are you a reader? I asked it in a different way. I'm in the marketplace, but I asked him are you a reader? I asked it in a different way. I'm in the marketplace, but I asked him are you a reader? And he said oh yeah, I love to read. That's how you get knowledge right. You learn what people have done before so you can learn how to do it too. You know all the right answers. It was great. He did a great job. He showed me his public persona. It was great. He did a great job. He showed me his public persona.

Speaker 1: 11:43

Our conversation progressed. We had a few teleconferences with each other. I made some introductions for him on his behalf. I gave him the opportunity to read a 10 minute summary or a 10 minute book. When I say 10 minutes, I'm being liberal. Probably takes less than that. I gave him a 10-minute summary to read. I wanted him to understand some things about what he was thinking about doing. So I gave him a summary Free, didn't charge him anything. It was just for him to read, either on his phone or on his computer. Simple, he preferred it that way. It was a match. It was months and the man still hadn't read it. But he loved to read, but he still couldn't crack it open. He didn't have 10 minutes in his life to read. A 10-minute summary or was his private persona coming through? That was the total opposite of his public persona in front of me about how much he knows to read and grow and develop himself. Something as simple as that.

Speaker 1: 13:39

Now, if you want to make excuses for him, go right ahead. I'm going to smash you in the comments if you do that, because there's no excuse. So you can try and tell me how. Oh, it's probably because of this, because of that. I spoke to them, I know what it was and I know what it wasn't. So if you want to make excuses for them, go right ahead, but you're going to get smashed in the comments if excuse for that. There's no excuse for not doing what you know you need to do to be successful and you tried your own way and it wasn't working. Somebody gave you a simple route to accomplish that and it lined up with what you said publicly you wanted to do. That's what happens when the public and the private don't match, when they don't match.

Speaker 1: 14:21

I've read success books all over. I mean I read a lot of success books and I mean a lot. I'm not exaggerating. I mean I read a lot of success books and they all advocate the same things, the same habits, the same mindsets. But reading them alone aren't going to do you any good. You've got to take the time to apply what you're reading. You got to do that.

Speaker 1: 14:45

There's so many people who are making excuses and saying they're so busy, which quite a few people I've met have made that excuse. I was just so busy, I was too busy for you is what they're trying to say. I got so much going on in my life I don't have time to do something as simple as reading for 10 minutes. So what do you have time to do and what are you busy doing? I'm not going to dispute if somebody said they're busy, because many times where I've had coffee meetings set up. I've had lunch meetings and lunch appointments set up. There have been times I've planned to meet somebody at a neutral location or somewhere favorable to them, where they might live close to the location that we're going to meet at. I've done it all. When they don't show up, they cite busyness as the reason why.

Speaker 1: 15:31

But a successful person finds ways to make time for what they want. I'm a firm believer, and I've said it all over my social media over the years people make time for who they want and they make time for what they want. I'll say it again for those way in the back that didn't catch that People make time for who they want and they make time for what they want. No excuses when I referenced that old episode of our show, season three, episode 35, emancipation of Busy. Well, we break it all the way down. We get all the way and it gets grimy. In that episode we get all the way in there. If you're not afraid to have your feathers ruffled, check that episode out the Emancipation of Busy, season three, episode 35. You're going to see it. You're going to see what I'm talking about, because people make time for what they want and they make time for who they want, no excuses and people who make excuses for not being able to read for 10 minutes.

Speaker 1: 16:40

What it says is you don't really want the thing that you say you want. Your public persona doesn't match your private persona. You're not fit for the next steps of success. Just being honest about it. You're not fit for it. You don't have to go to a school and get a master's degree or a doctorate to be successful. That's just one route that many people are taking. You don't have to have multiple classes and be a lifetime student. That's just some routes that some people are taking.

Speaker 1: 17:12

Most of the folks that you look to that are success stories around you, locally and nationally. Guess what? Most of them didn't even go to college. They don't even have any degrees. You know what they have A desire to get that thing done and a willingness to do whatever it takes to get it done. They would sit under the learning tree wherever they had to, for as long as they had to, to get what they wanted to get done accomplished. They read success books, just like me. They wanted to get done accomplished. They read success books, just like me, but they applied them and they put them into action, and they did it on a daily, consistent basis and they got it done. And now the success stories that we're looking at like, wow, how did they get there? That's how they got there.

Speaker 1: 18:00

One book that I love it's in my library by a gentleman named Stephen Covey. I've read a lot of his stuff over the years. I love his work. He talks about organization and being effective in marketplaces and in business and commerce. It's incredible, but it's a book called the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.

Speaker 1: 18:30

I'm a quote booster on this show man. That's what I do. I'm a big reader and I definitely want to spread that around because I believe that leaders are readers. You can try to play the role and try to front and put on a shirt and tie and say the right words, but if you're not reading, it's hard to imagine that you're going to grow very much without being able to read things that's going to help you in the field or realm you're trying to get into. But that book is by Stephen Covey, c-o-v-e-y Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. It's about seven habits that he believes will help you be highly effective and successful in any realm that you go into, and the second and third habit are the ones that kind of stick out to me. The second habit is begin with the end in mind. The third habit is put first things first and it goes into more detail. Of course you gotta read the book to get that, but with the second habit beginning with the end in mind. With the second habit, beginning with the end in mind, what's that talking about? What it's talking about is, before you start doing a thing, understand the goal you're trying to get to.

Speaker 1: 19:28

I have conversations literally every single day and I ask folks what's your big picture goal? Why are you at the job you're at? What are you trying to accomplish? There's a goal to the job you're at to keep up with your ambition level. Are you undervaluing yourself or are you challenging yourself? Are you where you want to be and where you need to be? What are you shooting for? What are you striving for? What's your big picture goal? And a lot of times a very high percentage, maybe about 70% they don't even know. They're just happy and comfortable in the job and they don't have any big picture plans. Their goal is just to make money, maybe having some fun on the weekend and get back to work on Monday morning. If that's you, I don't mean any offense or harm. It's your life, it's what you want to do.

Speaker 1: 20:23

But I actually look at this. This is a scenario. Suppose your job goes away and you don't get any warning. Nobody gives you a heads up before it happens. It's happened to me. That's how I know how it feels. It happened to me during COVID. I was working a job. I was smashing a job, matter of fact, I was kind of coasting. It was so easy. It wasn't any hard work to it, just a little stress. One day my boss came in with a box, didn't know what it was for. It was for my stuff. I was being relieved of my duties. Begin with the end in mind. When you start something, where are you trying to get to, even if it is a job, even if it is a business venture, even if it is a relationship where you started, where are you trying to get to? How do you hope for it to end? What's the big picture goal? What do you want to accomplish?

Speaker 1: 21:18

One of the third habits in the book seven habits of highly effective people is putting first things first. It's about prioritization, it's about focus. Those are the two things that most folks that are in the world of business, commerce, finances anything. They get that wrong. They can't put the first things first, they don't have the priorities right. Things get intermingled and mixed up and intertwined together and before you know it they don't know which way is loose and now they're just in survival mode and they're not really pushing toward their goals at all anymore. Their goals become further and further away and before you know it they end up in a nightstand draw and years have passed and they never accomplished a goal. Because, first things first, they put people in front of their goal, they put selfish desires in front of their goal, they put fear in front of their goal, they put doubt in front of their goals and before you know it, the goal got lost in the shuffle and they got put under a heap of a whole bunch of other stuff in life, a whole bunch of other obligations and fake emergencies, and before you know it they forgot what the goal even was.

Speaker 1: 22:31

One thing I learned about creating good habits and being successful, or being on the road to success and staying on that road, is to do the simple things, like arranging things, administration, planning, scheduling events and even writing. Those are things that are pretty common, but you'd be surprised how many folks refuse to arrange and plan anything. You'd be surprised how many folks refuse to schedule things. If we're talking on the phone, via text, or we're talking face-to-face in some public place and we're talking about a meeting for coffee on, say, monday the 17th or Friday the 3rd, you got to put it in your calendar. If you're trying to rely on memory, memorizing what we talked about or remembering it on your own, with all you got going on in your life, you're probably going to forget about it and I'll be sitting at the location and you won't be there because you didn't schedule it, you didn't put it. We talked about it, we agree, but you didn't schedule it. Those are the kinds of things that we just failed to do and it's so simple.

Speaker 1: 23:43

But every single success book I've read I've read plenty of them they all advocate this kind of stuff Planning, arranging, scheduling, even writing it down. That's one of the big ones people don't want to do. They don't write stuff down. Every success book I've ever seen, most of the times they advocate writing and journaling. A lot Like why? Why have to write down all these thoughts and write down all these ideas and plans, and write down all these goals and projections. Why do I have to write it down? Because you can't allow it in your memory to help you remember it.

Speaker 1: 24:16

What's written lasts longer than what's in your memory banks. That's why I thank the Lord for his word. If it wasn't written down, we'd be in trouble. Look how easily the children of Israel forgot what he said because it wasn't written down and they were trying to rely on passing it from generation to generation. When it was written down, they wouldn't even pay attention to it because they weren't invested in what was written down.

Speaker 1: 24:40

What's written lasts a lot longer than what's in your memory banks. Write it down. If it's important to you to do this and accomplish this, write it down, even if it's you know what? I got a lunch date with Mr U. I got a coffee appointment with Mr U. I got a Zoom call with Mr U. I got an interview with Mr U. Write it down, put it into a calendar, make it an event with a time attached to it. Write it down, put it in the calendar, schedule it, arrange it, plan for it, and do that with everything that you aspire to be successful in.

Speaker 1: 25:16

Every personal management guru and life coach, of which I used to be one I was a certified life coach for many years they all advised writing and journaling. For a reason why? Because you forget what you said. Has that not happened to you? How many Sunday mornings you stood in the lobby and forgot what you told somebody last week or two weeks ago and you had to remind them. Remember we were going to do this together. Oh, I forgot Because it wasn't scheduled, it wasn't written down. We become what we repeatedly do.

Speaker 1: 25:48

What do you want to become? What do you want to be? I just feel like that episode of Emancipation of Business is going to help you out. Season 3, episode 35, excuse me, it's going to help you. It's going to help you. It's going to help you out greatly, because what we do is we assign blame because things don't get done and we use the word busy as the reason why it didn't get done. You see, I was so busy. Two things on that One you might be legitimately busy. Two things on that One you might be legitimately busy. But the question I ask you maybe not as a life coach, maybe just as your friend today, I ask you this If you're busy, what are you busy with? Can you give a list because you've written it down of all the things you're busy with every single day throughout the course of a seven-day week? Can you tell me why you're busy with every single day throughout the course of a seven-day week? Can you tell me why you're so busy? You might have a lot of things to do every single day. It might make sense that you're so busy. Here's the question, though, to go with that first question, should you be doing all the things you have in that list? Are they really required of you? Stephen Curry writes books about that kind of stuff all the time. He's a foreknown expert on those areas. He'll tell you about that kind of stuff. He'll get deep into it. There's something called the Eisenhower Matrix. I advise you to check it out. It gets into that. Is it an emergency? Is it urgent? Is it unimportant? Is it vitally important? We've got to prioritize these things and we don't do that, and we wonder why we're not a success in the area of life that we're working in Because we're claiming busy when we shouldn't even have some of that on our plate. It should be scrapped off. There's a book that I've read and I'm reading. Still it's called 10X is Better Than 2X Yep. Another book recommendation I read and I'm reading. Still it's called 10X is better than 2X Yep. Another book recommendation. I told you I was doing that. That's what we do. I advise you to check it out because it talks about putting stuff in its right priority. If things are working towards your 20% and the most important things in your life, then you lean into that. But if not, those things go on the back burner. They're not worth your time because they don't produce the kind of fruit you want to produce. But we pay blame on everything and we say busy is the reason why. Thus the name of the episode. The Emancipation of Busy Like this is a real person. That's how the episode kind of sizes it up. We can't use busy as an excuse all the time. In that first scenario, do you have that much stuff that you are busy and why do you have that much stuff going on? Why are you doing so many things for so many people? And it doesn't feed into your ultimate purpose and goal that you have for this whole life thing you're doing. If you are actually busy legitimately. Here's the second scenario If you are actually busy legitimately, and you need to do certain things and you just can't avoid it. Here's my question why isn't it scheduled and arranged? If you know you're that busy and you know you've got that much stuff going on, why isn't it arranged? Why isn't it programmed in your phone? Why isn't it planned for, since you know? Why isn't it written down on the index card, especially, you know, in your journal, in your phone, in the notes app, somewhere? Why isn't it written down? If you know you got that much stuff going on, you're that busy, which you may be legitimately, why isn't it written down? That's the problem, that's the issue. So writing has been emphasized a lot in the past few minutes, but it's because it's that important. You may hate journaling, but you get the whole idea of what you hate and do what you need to do to help yourself, because you are affecting relationships and you're affecting the way your kids look at you and how your peers look at you and the respect you could have in a community you don't have because you're not a person that honors your word. And then, most importantly, how God looks at you. Can he trust you with more? Oh, you're praying for more now, but can he trust you with more I don't know how if you're not doing the little thing that he told you to do right? He can't trust me with more if I'm not doing the minimal things he told me to do, like the parable of the talents in Matthew, chapter 15. Sorry, matthew 25. The one who had the least got more because they did what they were supposed to do. Or the one that had the least loses that as well because they didn't do what they were supposed to do. Or the one that had the least loses that as well because they didn't do what they were supposed to be doing. It all depends on the intent and also the follow-through. It's going to determine the outcome. So you have good intentions all day long, but if you're not planning and arranging and writing and scheduling, your chances of being successful diminish greatly. What's written lasts longer than what's in your memory banks. You can't rely on your memory because you got too much stuff going on in your life and on top of that you're adding in other stimuli like music and television and movies and YouTube videos and reels on Instagram. You got all those other external stimuli coming in along with all the obligations you got in life Overloads a lot going on. You can't be expected to remember all that stuff. You got to write it down, plan for it. Maintain those relationships and those networks and those connections. Keep those ties strong that need to be kept. Be a person of honor, a person of integrity, like in Psalm 15, swear to your own hurt and don't change your mind. Do what you said you're going to do. I hope this was a blessing to you. I'm definitely blessed by this. I definitely learned something from this myself. So I'm super amped about this and amped to get into this kind of get into some of the scriptures and just grow, because I need to, same way you guys do. So I thank you for joining us. If you're listening to our show audio-wise only, of course you can find us on iHeartRadio, pandora, spotify and Apple Podcasts. Of course you can also find us on Budsproutcom. Our show is there. That's our podcast host. Long-standing relationship with them for years now it's been a blessing. You can find all of our episodes. Check out that. Season three, episode number 35, emancipation of Busy B-U-S-Y. The Emancipation of Busy, season three episode, episode 35. That will be our 117th episode altogether. And, of course, if you're watching us and listening our YouTube channel at YouTubecom slash theycallmemistayu M-I-S-T-A-Y-U, same as in this caption beneath my picture. Okay, of course we're also simulcasting on Facebook, twitter, instagram, of course, youtube again, and TikTok and, of course, twitter. Thank you for downloading, subscribing to our show, love and appreciate you guys so much. Hope you enjoy all you heard today and hope you enjoy the music. We'll be right back.