Getting on the Golden Path of "Dune": High n' Dry #73

Embark on a whimsical journey through time and space as we serve up a cocktail of cult classic fandom and philosophical musings in this latest adventure of the High n' Dry Podcast. Ryan Baron North and James Crosslin are your hosts, pouring a stiff one with Brothers Bond Bourbon and sprinkling some "fairy dust" cannabis for good measure. Hitch a ride to the dusty dunes of Arrakis. It's a full-on geek-out session, blending pop culture references with a side of historical oddities—did you know about that weird Texas-Oklahoma history slice?

Strap in as we traverse the treacherous landscape of "Dune," juxtaposing David Lynch's 1984 film against its modern counterpart, and marvel at the narrative labyrinth Frank Herbert created. Expect a hearty discussion on the portrayal of women in the epic saga, the storytelling prowess (or lack thereof) of internal monologues, and a whimsical "what if" scenario that mashes up the "Dune" universe with bourbon-soaked revelry. We don't shy away from the tough critiques either, diving into the film's undercurrents of bro love, and pondering the deeper messages Herbert may have been encoding in his masterpiece.

As our session winds down, we tease the senses with a hint of a Total Recall special that's brewing just over the horizon. We're all about engaging with our listeners, feeling the love from our YouTube family, and raising a glass to all of you across our platforms. Before the curtain falls, we tip our hats to film remakes and share a hot take on Jessica's portrayal in the newer Total Recall. It's a whirlwind of thought-provoking banter and intoxicating debate, so pull up a chair, and let's raise the bar together on this episode of the High n' Dry Podcast.

Transcript

High and Dry Podcast

Ryan Baron North 0:15

Yeah, I got that. I got some notes. I got some notes. I'm I don't know. This is gonna be interesting. This is. That was fucking weird. So, hey, everybody, welcome to high and dry podcast, the only podcast you know that is still keeping alive the fandom of let's do critters, critters to, critters to. Yeah, we're still out there, we're still doing our thing, we're still pushing the merch.

James Crosslin 0:45

You know, I haven't, I've never seen critters. Would that be a good one for this podcast?

Ryan Baron North 0:50

No, okay it was, it was bad.

James Crosslin 0:57

No, we've had Rebel Moon on here before, so I think there's gonna be some Rebel Moon comparisons coming up.

Ryan Baron North 1:06

I think so too, I feel. I feel Glasgow is starting to get used to that. So so, hey, everyone, welcome to the show. As I was saying, I'm Ryan Baron North, with me, as always, james Crosslin. James, what's going on?

James Crosslin 1:22

Hey, things are going well. It's beautiful out here in Southern California. I I just made a giant pot of black beans, so everything's awesome.

Ryan Baron North 1:34

Hell, yeah, hell yeah, and I'm coming at you from a hotel room in the tip of Texas, near Wichita. Just the tip, just the tip. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you know why Oklahoma has that little slice of what looks like it should belong to Texas?

James Crosslin 1:56

Because Texas didn't want it.

Ryan Baron North 1:59

Because at the time the Congress determined that above that that line on the map, you can't own slaves, and Texas decided that they would rather give that chunk to Oklahoma than to not own slaves in that area. They're principled. That's the thing is.

James Crosslin 2:21

We have to admire how principles Texas is when it comes to when it comes to cruelty.

Ryan Baron North 2:31

They, they have it down to a science. So, for those of you, this is your first episode. This is how we do this. We're going to be talking about some pop culture, some philosophy. We're going to have a good time with it, and what makes it all the more fun is that we're going to be doing it drunk and high. James, what are you smoking this week?

James Crosslin 2:51

So this week I've got Kush Mount. It's the return of Kush Mountain. We're going back to the cliffs of Kush Mountain and I've also scooped some Keith in there. Do you know about Keith? I think that's a phrase. Yeah, Keith is afraid is a word that's thrown around a lot when talking about weed and I don't feel like it's clearly communicated.

James Crosslin 3:13

So when you grind some cannabis flower, there's like this dust on the surface and that dust contains these things called trichromes, which are what contain a bunch of the THC and a bunch of the terpenes, things that give the cannabis its flavor and stuff. And when they dry out they're like kind of loose on the surface. They can get rubbed off on things. Or when you grind, they like get sifted through and a lot of grinders. There's like a mesh screen that we're only a little bit, where only very tiny stuff can get through, and they got a collector at the bottom. A lot of people don't use this stuff, but but it comes out the bottom and it's like super concentrated cannabis and it's like it's got all. It's got so much THC and it's like this little fine powder and so I'm putting that power, my wife and I. Before we knew the terminology, we called it fairy dust because it like it fucks your shit up.

Ryan Baron North 4:08

And that's what I'm going to do today. Lovely, so I'm going to be joining you with one of my particular fit, my personal favorites Brothers Bond Bourbon.

Ryan Baron North 4:19

It's I love the flavor of it. It's got a very you got a very caramel flavor. There's a lot going on with this and it doesn't have it's smooth going down, so you really could just pop it down. No problems, no questions. I started drinking it a while back and I had some friends I was with time said they were, they were female friends and they said, oh my God, you're drinking Brothers Bond and I didn't know Bourbon was a big thing in those circles. They explained to me that the dudes from the Vampire Diaries are the ones who make it.

Ryan Baron North 4:56

We've had Brothers.

James Crosslin 4:57

Bond on the show. Before, go back and listen to our other episodes. You'll find it.

Dune (1984) Movie Discussion and Comparison

Ryan Baron North 5:02

Yeah, and I'm well, I'm still coming back. So, vampire Diary guys, I'm still appreciating your bourbon, so thank you for that.

James Crosslin 5:09

So let's line them up this is in a barrel with a creature of the night for 100 years Nestled in the coffin of a vampire.

Ryan Baron North 5:22

Here's our first one. This one goes to our movie of the week, dune 1984, specifically Cheers.

James Crosslin 5:30

Cheers I. I first see some comparisons I do too To the new, because it's it's hard to talk about the old one without without talking about the new one. We've got an update, you know.

Ryan Baron North 5:46

Yeah, definitely without a doubt. I have my Dune novel nearby as well.

James Crosslin 5:51

Good, Good so we can just go. I've got my, my, my copy that you gave me somewhere around here.

Ryan Baron North 5:59

Every household needs one copy of Dune. So the second one, this toast I'm actually this one's gonna go to returning visitors. Apparently, these guys, like you know they like a little abuse Our folks over at Glasgow. They decided to come back for round two after we, after we, trashed them on the show. So I thank you guys for being good sports. This one's to you Cheers. It's easier the second time. I kind of feel bad. This is this beverage is meant to be sipped, not chugged down. Well, listen to me.

James Crosslin 6:43

Not, I think. I think in in relation to our subject for today dude, you can't always choose your circumstances. You gotta, you gotta work with what you got, make the most of what you got.

Ryan Baron North 6:57

That's right. Well then, let's line up this third one, and here's to making the most of what you have Cheers.

James Crosslin 7:08

The sleeper has awakened oh man.

Ryan Baron North 7:14

Oh, thank you, fan fire guys. That that's hitting my empty stomach real good so this is the golden path. All right, so I'm on the golden path. This is how we're gonna do this the first part of the show. We're gonna have our sober thoughts. Second part of the show we're gonna have our elevated, heightened thoughts, once we've actually stepped on to the golden path, and finally we're gonna do a what if?

Ryan Baron North 7:44

Yeah, this is gonna happen real fast. I'm gonna be riding this sandworm real quick. So, and then round three. We're gonna have a what if scenario we're gonna slam ourselves into doom, or we're gonna introduce bourbon to arachis. We'll see how it goes. So. So, james, off the cuff. Your, your sober thoughts. We just watched that.

James Crosslin 8:11

Yeah, it was a hard movie to watch. It's just, it's David Lynch. You'd expect some. You know you expect something really engaging and fast. You know he likes got the movement right Like a fight club or something You'd expect like that kind of of experience, but it's so slow. It's so slow. This is the first time I've seen the movie, by the way, okay, okay, what about you?

Ryan Baron North 8:43

The it was. So I will say this all right, lynch was definitely. He was definitely a dune nerd. You could definitely feel that he loved the material and he got a bunch of friends of his and actors that were coming up and who liked dune too and they're like, we have this weighty fucking tome that no one originally wanted to publish and I'm gonna take this and I am going to giz it out onto a camera.

James Crosslin 9:25

You know, I think he got, I think he said I'm pretty sure I read this when I was like looking around for dune info is that he said that there was studio interference and he might have made a completely different movie if there wasn't so much studio interference. And he ended up, he said after this, like he didn't let anyone touch his shit anymore. He was like I demand full control and it's paid off for him.

Ryan Baron North 9:53

Well, yeah, yeah, he became and it was just speaking of it paid off for them. It was so weird looking at these like sets that you would see in 1960s Star Trek, crammed full of actors who were gonna become a big deal.

James Crosslin 10:12

Yeah, the sets were very funny. The costumes were very funny. I loved the. I loved the hazmat guys versus the gas station attendance. Do you remember that fight?

Ryan Baron North 10:23

Yes, yes, I do.

James Crosslin 10:26

People with like nuclear safety gear versus guys in caps and belts.

Ryan Baron North 10:33

And the wildest thing was, 90% of that movie was people entering a place.

James Crosslin 10:42

Yeah.

Ryan Baron North 10:48

Like they didn't realize that you can cut to the meat and potatoes of a scene.

James Crosslin 10:53

We don't have to always know how they entered the room, but in the past that was a thing, though you had to show people entering, Like if you watch a movie from the past, that shit happens all the time. It is so stupid and boring. I don't know. We're audiences at the time like where the fuck did that guy come from?

Ryan Baron North 11:16

Well, it's like a WWE main event, you know, like every scene, every last scene. And I loved when there were so many times when an extra or like a bit player like you could see that he was just trying to get himself on camera and he would go super extra with it, like the dudes with the Gatling guns, would move someone into the screen and they were just being so wild with it. It was.

James Crosslin 11:50

Brad Dorough did one of those where this was like Brad Dorough, up and coming. He played pitter and when, when he like died after Lito, like blew the gas in his face, he like, he like his body went back, like I was like man. He really overdid it and it was very funny. But now, but now Brad Dorough, big actor, yeah.

Ryan Baron North 12:13

Well, I'm glad you brought him up. Well, he was snake tongue when he. Worm tongue in order to rings. Yeah, yeah, well, basically the same character. Well, I recall when you and I watched the new Dune with Shalamet yeah, we had a problem with how they portrayed Pite here, and because they? Because he is a Mentat assassin you know, he is a wild mix of things in the universe and they just totally glossed over him. And then we go back to this 1984 one, and I feel they did it then too.

James Crosslin 12:55

You think so. I think they gave him, I think they gave Piter a lot to do. I think they, they actually, they actually let him go a little, hand it up a little. They were chewing on the scenery, peter, piter and and Vladimir. They were chewing on the fucking scenery, dude. They were picking out of their teeth for days they. I like this movie. I thought it was good.

Ryan Baron North 13:21

I know I'm going to agree with you on that the when the Baron and his little Mentat assassin were on screen, you know it was like no, it reminded me of it. Reminded me and like this is going to be a. You know you have to like pack a lunch for this, you know stretch, but it reminded me of Muppet Christmas Carol where?

James Crosslin 13:43

No, no, I don't.

Ryan Baron North 13:45

Fuck you Wickey List. But then you got these two dudes who, like I'm going to play this thing, like I'm getting an Academy Award off of this, like this is my chance, and I felt that's what, what? Piter and the Baron? When they were on screen they're like let's give it everything. We got.

James Crosslin 14:02

They really did. They gave it everything they got. When, when, when the Baron was staring at sting just like like, yeah, he did such a good job, so I wanted to get that out of the way and say something good about this movie before you rip it apart.

Ryan Baron North 14:23

Oh yeah, and so well, then I feel like okay, so I do have a thought, but I'm going to save that for when we're on the golden path Fully. I will say one more time that, in the comparison between New Dune and 84, the Baron, while still very comical, especially when he's spinning through the air into the worms mouth yeah, was much more like holy shit. This dude needs to go.

James Crosslin 14:58

Yeah, yeah, he was like truly evil in this one. Yeah, they really showed him being a weird goblin, yeah.

Ryan Baron North 15:08

In New Dune, the only difference between Lado and the Baron was that the Baron was fat and ugly yeah, and between two authoritarians I was just supposed to hate fat and ugly. In this, though, between all the authoritarians on the table, we have a fucked up guy who's got a go yeah, and they definitely accomplished that a little better, I feel.

James Crosslin 15:35

Oh yeah, I mean they didn't have him raping enough young boys or eating people, like like Frank Herbert would have wanted. You know, that's what he put in his book. I wanted to see it on screen. I'm just kidding.

Analysis of Dune Adaptations

Ryan Baron North 15:50

Wait Well, and I'll be honest with you, I'm watching this movie from what? 40 years ago almost exactly, and when he's going at that young sexy thing, I kind of like I was like kind of looking away like it was a hard scene to watch.

James Crosslin 16:11

I wrote, I wrote down oh, where is it? I said when, when they had, when they had him getting sexual gratification from spitting in, jet in a in a bound woman's face. That was one of the tamest things that Frank Herbert wrote about women in his fucking dude series. It's like, yeah, I'm glad, I'm glad they included some of it, but he but Frank Herbert went so much further. He was real fucked up about his oh yeah about women in his books for sure.

James Crosslin 16:43

Just scratching the surface of the of how much he hated and and wanted to fuck all the women.

Ryan Baron North 16:51

Yeah, you know, and he well. With that being said, I feel like we're there. We're touching on some pretty heavy shit. Now I think we've arrived.

James Crosslin 17:02

Oh yeah, we are on the golden. The sleeper has awakened.

Ryan Baron North 17:07

The sleeper has awakened. It's time for our last go at this, so he is the quiz.

James Crosslin 17:14

I had an act.

Ryan Baron North 17:17

She was creepy.

James Crosslin 17:19

She was. She was really good too. I thought I thought they shot Alia so well.

Ryan Baron North 17:24

Well, here's to Alia. You definitely stayed with us in that fever dream of a fucking movie.

James Crosslin 17:32

Cheers. Oh my God, all right, I love, I love the Reverend mother. She's an abomination.

Ryan Baron North 17:45

She got blasted back so much in that movie. She was always getting blasted.

James Crosslin 17:52

Reverend mother was a. She really hammed it up, she hammed it.

Ryan Baron North 17:56

Sometimes I liked it.

James Crosslin 17:57

Sometimes I thought it was, I thought she was a flat yeah. When she was on it. She was on it.

Ryan Baron North 18:04

Yeah, for sure, for sure. All right, so we're on the golden path and we took a little extra just for the trip. Your enlightened thoughts, james. What do you got?

James Crosslin 18:14

So I think my enlightened thoughts, I think I think this concept hits better when you're inebriated. So I want to talk a little bit about where this movie failed and I think the way it failed. You know obviously the internal monologues, right. There was so much inner voice shit and it was mostly exposition. I wrote down here a few things that I found very funny about the internal monologues was. One of them was Lato. Where are you, jessica? Just thinking.

James Crosslin 18:53

Oh yeah, lato, where are you? And it's like she could have just said that, or she could have just had pleading eyes, something like that. Like it was so easy when, when Fade Sting was like I wish, I wish it was Paul on this table in his mind. Yeah, instead of just saying a word, just saying it yeah. Or like teasing, you know, taunting Lato or something, the inner monologue shit was wild. Well, that was bad, oh good.

Ryan Baron North 19:27

Well, on that point I will say that Dune 1984 brought us, you know, perhaps the most Zack, snyderian bit of fucking exposition I've ever seen. Well, yeah, and then the beginning when Princess Erlan is explaining where the fuck we are right now, fades out and then fades back in to say, oh, I almost forgot.

James Crosslin 19:58

I'm like what the fuck are you talking about? You were talking to me.

Ryan Baron North 20:05

You got the script. How could? You forget that was. That was fucking mind boggling. I had no problem with her face on the screen. I will say that.

James Crosslin 20:20

It was just that you learned right then that this was an off the cuff kind of like. She didn't plan this at all. She was like all right, we're starting a movie, let's do it.

Ryan Baron North 20:32

I got some shit to say about Paul. Yeah, we're married, but here's the uncut shit. Why? Why would they know where in Herbert's book was there a fucking segment that said oh, I almost forgot to tell you about this shit, but, dude, you're the one doing the drafts, man, you're the one who's editing. You could just not forget anymore.

James Crosslin 21:03

Yeah, it's really like. It kind of like sums up this movie, as a lot of things were in afterthought.

Ryan Baron North 21:11

You didn't have to do this, oh yeah.

James Crosslin 21:14

But it was absolutely wild, I have to assume, or I have to assume the inner monologue was also like could have also been producer notes, I don't know, it's so hard to tell.

Ryan Baron North 21:26

Oh, he's just been fucking bullshit to save his face.

James Crosslin 21:30

Well, I, I, I'm not going to go back and read fucking Dune right now, like that's. It was too much on my plate to like watch this movie, then go back and read it.

Ryan Baron North 21:38

Oh, yeah, but.

James Crosslin 21:39

I assume that a lot. There is a lot of inner monologue stuff in the book.

Ryan Baron North 21:43

There is, there is. I did do, I did flip through.

James Crosslin 21:47

And that's the thing. So here's the core of what I was getting at is that the way we consume media for books and movies is inherently different. Like it's you can he was. He was trying to like straight adapt a book into a movie, but the problem is like this movie is accessible in the way like a dictionary is accessible.

Ryan Baron North 22:13

It's like, yeah, you can Is there.

James Crosslin 22:16

It is there and you can open to like any word, but there's a reason people don't fucking read it in order and when you do, it's a nightmare. And Frank Herbert's book was kind of like that. And the thing about a book is that you can stop after a paragraph and kind of take a break and think about it like, oh, you know the space guild, they, they take spice to help them predict the future. That's what keeps intergalactic travel going. What does that mean for the greater universe? What is it like to be? You know, a person on a planet and essentially your ties to the universe are controlled by the spacing guild. You know, what does it mean to, to to be able to predict? You know whether there's obstacles in the path, like houses. It's precognition. What's this life in society like you know you?

James Crosslin 23:10

have time to ruminate on those things when you're reading. But in this fucking movie, like things move so so fast, they like tell you a bunch of information. It's like, OK, here's some more information. Ok, someone else's engine. But you don't read a book like a movie. You're not on a set set pace like that and I think that's the core of the problem. When we talk about like bad movies and lazy movies and these kinds of adaptations, is it's a movie is a different medium. We are adaptation has to be different. Yes, yes.

Ryan Baron North 23:47

And I so to your point. I think that it was the most clear that this has just become nonsense in the final battles, where shit was just happening and too much shit is happening, where you're just like, yeah, it's working because it's supposed to, I guess yeah, and then then Sting, got stung and that was the end of it. Yeah, and then it rained.

James Crosslin 24:16

And he is the quits I had an eye.

Ryan Baron North 24:22

Hey, that girl was giving in her all, but then she's 50 now. But the other thing I would say is that I feel that New Dune over corrected, so where?

James Crosslin 24:40

you almost get no information. It's just like shots of scenery.

Ryan Baron North 24:46

Yeah, it's just like I'm just supposed to be invested because Aquaman's kicking some ass and I, you know I unpopular opinion, but Charlemagne, or whatever the fuck his name is, it is a huge turn off for me. I ain't gonna lie so, but so was 1984, paul.

James Crosslin 25:07

I think so here's the thing. Here's the thing. Paul's a fucking loser, like the later. The later books essentially show that.

Ryan Baron North 25:17

And that's what I was trying to say get into eventually there. Was that what comes at the end. So the director of the new Dune has already stated that he's looking at a trilogy and potentially a TV series.

James Crosslin 25:33

Yes, the barbelification of everything.

Ryan Baron North 25:36

Yes, and when the reason Herbert went on record saying that, hey, you're not supposed to be rooting for any of these fucking people, because when you start rooting for these fucking people, you wind up with an immortal fat bastard who controls the way you think, feel and live.

James Crosslin 25:56

Yeah, yeah. Sometimes you get a leader like Paul who will do okay to like pursue some of your needs and then fuck off, yeah.

Ryan Baron North 26:10

He's all up his own ass and that and like he was trying to say that, hey, you are attracted to Lado and Paul because of a relative charisma and a general perception versus a pedophilia piece of shit. But all that ever comes of it is a worm that controls your life for the next 3000 years.

James Crosslin 26:40

Yeah, yeah, it was very. It was very much like fanaticism is bad. Leaders are not great.

Ryan Baron North 26:49

Yeah, and in a trilogy, in the new one especially, where we're just hopping and skipping over every little bit of information, that's definitely going to be lost. And I feel the only reason Dune has any place jumping its story into modern society is to warn us against authoritarianism. And we're not doing that. If we're, you know, just aquamanning the fuck out of it.

James Crosslin 27:21

Yeah, it was a little too much visual so so yeah, I think these are two opposite sides of the filmmaking spectrum. I think that the new Dune could have done with more exposition given to us. It doesn't have to be people talking directly to our face, you know it could be. They did a few things in the new Dune that I liked, where like displays came up and kind of you learned things from displays. You learned things like like their technology right, some kind of screen or something you learned something from that or they had like. But it could have been more. There were very few in the new Dune.

Ryan Baron North 28:01

Yes, yeah, well, I mean, there wasn't even have his instrument.

James Crosslin 28:06

You know I gurney didn't have, in the new one, a 15 pound pug tucked into his jacket as he ran into battle, which I thought was very funny. Patrick Stewart with a dog and a gun running out to face the shot of car.

Ryan Baron North 28:26

Easily the best part of original Dune was when they made Stewart the long haired bald guy.

James Crosslin 28:34

It was so funny when he showed up with the long hair, like, were you so surprised at that first scene where they meet again, he looks like an offensive. It's like an offensive mullion raider haircut.

Ryan Baron North 28:48

Like I don't know what they were thinking he looks insane. He looks absolutely insane. Patrick Stewart man.

James Crosslin 28:57

Jesus, just shave it. You gotta have a knife, you gotta be able to just be able to cut it. They have future knives.

Ryan Baron North 29:05

They have future knives and he decided, no, no, I am going to let this shit out.

James Crosslin 29:15

And you know it's great in the desert. A bunch of hair on your neck, best feeling when it's hot out.

Ryan Baron North 29:24

Oh yeah, and he's just sweating the fuck out of it. Yeah, no, yeah. That was also not the weirdest choice by by old dude, but definitely up there.

James Crosslin 29:35

Definitely they didn't show the. They didn't show the pug again. I'm assuming the pug died.

Ryan Baron North 29:41

My assumption and then the director is just like we have too much extra in this. I cannot have you morning the pug to Patrick Stewart.

James Crosslin 29:54

Patrick Stewart wasn't grooming because the dog died, and that's how. That's why his hair was all through.

Ryan Baron North 30:00

Yeah, he had no hope anymore. Yeah, there it is. There you have it, and I think then it's time to move into the third portion of this. It's time to get into our what ifs, so welcome to the what ifs everybody.

Ryan Baron North 30:13

It's time. Welcome to the what ifs everybody. So in this portion of it, we're gonna we're gonna insert some shit into Dune. We're going to either insert our particular drug of choice into Dune or we're going to insert ourselves and we're going to see what happens. So, james, what happens in a Dune world where James is there too?

James Crosslin 30:40

Man. So one part that I absolutely loved from this version of Dune was the scene where they get on the worm, right when Paul and Stilgar get on the worm.

Ryan Baron North 30:56

And they're back to fuck.

James Crosslin 30:58

The triumphant like guitar. It was like a traffic guitar.

Ryan Baron North 31:01

We're rocking out.

Critique of the Film Dune

James Crosslin 31:04

And he had the reins and he was like looking back and Stilgar like this is fucking rad, and Stilgar's like yeah, this is rad, and I would. I would. What I would do is try to capture that moment and try to apply it to every other situation and really I think that could have saved this movie. They didn't. There was no inner monologue. It was like music and it was sight and it was like expressions and I was like I thought it was great. I thought it was great. I want more of it. I would have done that in every situation. When Paul like when Paul catches the hunter seeker and he crushes it like the guitar, like goes to crushes and he gives them like a knowing look like it's fucking rad. Right, it was rad as shit. Well, yeah, what she did was rad.

Ryan Baron North 31:59

That was. Oh, I'm glad you brought that particular scene up, because I had, right before we got on air here, I put it back on and I was just sort of flipping through it and I didn't wind up stopping at that. That fucking scene it was so, it was so wild, oh my God. It was this random moment in the movie where they're like, hey, it's still the 80s, all right, let's fucking do this.

Ryan Baron North 32:31

We're on a. We're on a fucking worm. The wind is in my hair. There is definitely some homosexual undertones coursing through this, and I'm just ready to.

James Crosslin 32:45

It's bro love man.

Ryan Baron North 32:47

Ready to let it rip. I mean, we're talking about that period in time when music videos was just the dudes banging it out long hair in a factory, and now we're on top of a worm. That was like holy shit, I forgot this was in the 80s and not. Oh, that was crazy. So I guess with me I would definitely insert myself into Paul's role, but I'd bring along Meatloaf just to he's fucking rocking out on the guitar back there and he gives me the thumbs up whenever I'm doing something really cool. But then for me, as Paul, though I so, just in the terms of the 1984 film, inserting myself into that film with Chani, there was no. They spent the whole fucking movie on exposition but they never showed me or even told me why he was into her.

James Crosslin 34:00

That would be If you dreamed about a pretty woman and then you met her in real life. You'd be like what the fuck? I'm really into you.

Ryan Baron North 34:14

Honestly, I would be all over the princess and I would just fucking dive head first into imperialism and just see where this takes me and I'd look over my shoulder to make sure that Meatloaf was still fucking rocking out and I'd be like yo. She is definitely a gorgeous woman and she explains a lot. She lets me know where I'm at and even when she forgets where she's at, she comes back and reminds me. And so, yeah, I'd be Paul, but I'd be more all over Princess Earl for sure.

James Crosslin 34:56

Well, Paul gets to be Spoilers for Dune Messiah. He does end up married to her.

Ryan Baron North 35:04

So I mean and she gets really mad that he refuses to lie with her, no, he refuses to impregnate her. Yes, yes.

James Crosslin 35:17

I think he can control whether he impregnates a woman, because that's a benny, jesuit. Power is controlling whether you get pregnant or not. I think that he has that control over himself.

Ryan Baron North 35:29

Yeah. So for those of you who are getting all on to Timothy Charlemagne, remember that he is definitely manipulating both of these women as hard as he's manipulating the local economy.

James Crosslin 35:41

Because you can see the past and the future, and then this is a power dynamic, injustice what's happening. Paul needs to be alone, totally. He's the most powerful being in the universe. There's no way he can have a relationship with a person that doesn't have a severe power of balance.

Ryan Baron North 36:02

Yeah, but he still tries, he still tries he is selfish.

James Crosslin 36:07

Paul is a selfish person.

Ryan Baron North 36:09

And that is what Herbert was trying to say. Was that, hey, you were rooting for this guy the whole fucking time. And look at him now, with all this power, he's married to the emperor's daughter, he's still with the woman he loves, he's having his way with both of them in these situations, because he can, and he is the one who rules you. And that has just been completely lost on any attempt to bring these books into film. Was that? Hey, paul ain't great.

James Crosslin 36:50

Yeah, this guy's actions have effects on real people and it's not just the story of a great man. I think it's a problem with our culture. Really, is this myth of the great man and how their choices are really the only way great things happen? And it's like fuck. That's kind of like what we're dealing with. Of course, people are going to misinterpret it.

Ryan Baron North 37:16

Yeah, no, it's especially sad because, if you like, taking all the Lovecraftian character flaws out of her. He was literally just trying to warn you about politics. Politics. He was trying to warn you and then every time we try and adapt it, we completely ignore the moral grayness between these authoritarians. And if you go further and you read spoiler alerts, everybody. Paul's son becomes a giant dictator worm and there's an entire book about a clone of Duncan and his sex slave teaming up to kill him.

James Crosslin 38:14

I wonder if Jason Momoa is going to come back for that one yeah, he's got to or they're going to have to like AI create them.

Ryan Baron North 38:22

They got to do something, because also in that book there is a scene where so just for the sake of bringing you guys into this where Jason Momoa Duncan, idaho, is climbing a ridge so hard. He is climbing a ridge so fucking hard that a woman, a warrior woman who has been brought up with women, who has done nothing but train with women and protect slug Nazi, who secretly wants people to realize that he's the bad guy she sees him climbing this ridge so fucking hard that she comes.

James Crosslin 39:09

It's wild. Frank Herbert like really wrote some crazy shit. Like I said, spitting a spitting spitting on a bound woman's face for sexual pleasure is very tame for Frank Herbert.

Ryan Baron North 39:23

Very tame, very fucking tame. It's. It's holy shit, it's insane. It's insane. But movie adaptations they don't know whether to cover some random woman who's only been with women coming to Jason Momoa or to make you see that Timothy Charlemagne is a bad guy too. He just doesn't fuck boys Right.

James Crosslin 39:50

And you know he's not. He's going to send a bunch of people of a different ethnicity against his enemy to die. He's doing his a wild concept. He's going to create a cult for these, for these native peoples, and send them against his enemies.

Ryan Baron North 40:11

Yeah, yeah, that's.

James Crosslin 40:12

Hooray Paul.

Ryan Baron North 40:15

Yeah, go Paul. He literally creates a cult and watches them die, and the whole time his visions are just fucking sucking his own dick.

James Crosslin 40:27

It's amazing that all these visions work out in your favor, Paul.

Ryan Baron North 40:31

Yeah, that's pretty crazy, ain't it? So then, just to bring it back to the final what-if here, delving into that portion of it, I would say you bring me into it. Jokes aside, I'm just gonna kill Paul, I'm gonna wait for him to kill Sting and then I'm gonna just murder the room. This room here at the end of Dune 1 needs to fucking die. The emperors gotta go, sting's gotta go, paul's gotta go, jessica's gotta go, they all gotta go. And yeah, that's my what-if. Right there, you got a final what-if, chint.

James Crosslin 41:22

I would have just rode into the sunset with Stilgar. That's how it would have ended, is Stilgar and I just would have gone off together and lived on the top of a worm? A beautiful life on this, on Shia Luz back.

Ryan Baron North 41:41

With those intents. Just you looking over your shoulder back at him and he's just so fucking proud of you.

James Crosslin 41:48

We would get baby-burdened spice directly from Shia Luz's mouth every day.

Ryan Baron North 41:57

Oh my god so I'm bathing in the blood of the Imperium and I'm just looking out at the desert going, you know he's living his best life. I can't help but be happy for him.

James Crosslin 42:13

Quiet, quiet, desert life.

Ryan Baron North 42:16

Me and Stilgar.

James Crosslin 42:21

All right, so final notes that I didn't get around to that. I wrote down the way UA says the tooth, the tooth, the tooth. Very funny fucking. It had me cracking up Hilarious. Let me see.

Ryan Baron North 42:44

Like if this was done by Monty Python or, you know, Mel Brooks nail on a fucking kill there.

James Crosslin 42:54

The tooth. Also, I wrote down sweet cubes. That was the only just sweet cubes. I think it was about their shield generators, sweet cubes. And then I said I wrote somewhere else sweet dive roll. I did not write what it was referencing, I just wrote sweet dive roll. I assume it was like the Hunter Seeker or something.

Ryan Baron North 43:25

So sweet cubes would have been the best thing Paul could have said during that guitar scene. Oh shit.

James Crosslin 43:39

Oh man, I also wrote. I'm grateful that when the shelf of weirding modules is destroyed, we didn't have to watch them blow up one by one, because if you watch some of these older movies like, they'll literally do like. I watched the original Italian job recently because it's like oh, it's a classic, whatever it's got, it's got Michael Cain, you know it's a classic. I had to watch them do like they broke windows. I had to watch them break like 15 windows.

James Crosslin 44:10

It's individually without it's like it's like I get it, I fucking get it. Maybe. Maybe at the time they were like look how great our production is, look how many windows we can break. It's so action-y. But I like watch them break like 15 windows in a row. It was so boring.

Ryan Baron North 44:25

And bringing it back around to Michael Cain and Muppet Grasmus Carroll. It was not Michael Cain's fault.

James Crosslin 44:33

But I do want to say that that was a little bit of directorial competence. I think that when we watch our next one that I'm trying to get you to watch I don't know if you did already Total recall is coming up next. Yeah, they, they do this explosion thing. Watch out for it. They do like a thing where you watch several explosions, but it's a it's, it's right in the midway point where it's not like okay, this is a fast movie, action movie, and not that it's like wow, they really don't understand that you don't show an explosion.

James Crosslin 45:02

It's like that perfect area where it's satire.

Ryan Baron North 45:05

And I love it. I'm excited to watch it. It's on HBO Max right. Yes, I think so you did that, then I'm good to go, or pair them out. I'll yank that out, or I probably won't, but we're 45 and 50 seconds in, so well, there you have it, folks. Thank you so much for tuning in. We've been talking Dune here. Remember to always, you know, check the message of the author before you insert the movie into yourself. Paul is a bad guy.

James Crosslin 45:35

He is. And but do remember, fear is the mind killer.

Ryan Baron North 45:41

Yes, yeah, and if you take anything away from this, please remember, the fear is the mind killer. Next week we're going to be hitting a total recall. That's the original, with short to nager, not the really sexy one with Kate Beckinsale and Jessica B.

James Crosslin 45:56

You forgot someone I don't know.

Ryan Baron North 46:02

Matthew Perry was in that one, I think I don't remember yeah.

James Crosslin 46:07

It didn't have. It didn't have very, very sexy women in it and it really distracted from, like the comedy.

Ryan Baron North 46:14

Oh, my God.

James Crosslin 46:15

It was supposed to be campy and they made it wait. Holy shit.

Total Recall and Happy Mooddeep Discussion

Ryan Baron North 46:19

It was so fucking sexy when, when Kate Beckinsale slides across that table and attacks him with her vagina, I was like I'd be a dead man. That's like that's the end for me. I'd be like, kate, whatever life you wanted me to live, I'm in, I'm fucking in. Yeah. So, anyway, end of the episode. There you go. There you have it, folks. Thank you so much for listening. Next week, total recall, if you're seeing us on YouTube. Thanks for finding the join in the party. Like us everywhere, please. It gets our numbers up. You know how it goes. I promise we'll never really bombard you with ads, even when we're big and over our heads. So yeah, Bye.

James Crosslin 46:57

Happy Mooddeep to you. Happy Mooddeep to you as well. Happy Mooddeep to you as well. Happy Mooddeep to you as well.

Ryan Baron North 47:01

Happy Mooddeep to you as well. Happy Mooddeep to you as well. Happy Mooddeep to you as well. And I will say Jessica in the new one was better than Jessica in the old one. Last thought there, it is Okay, all right.