High n' Dry Podcast
"Total Recall" was a Dream: High n' Dry Episode #74
Now, folks, have you ever imagined what it'd be like if 'Total Recall' had a heart transplant, swapping brawn for emotion? Hold onto your hats as we toss around a 'what if' scenario that'll have you questioning your own life choices. And because we can't resist, we're also serving up a side of laughter with a review of this Schwarzenegger classic—stunt mishaps, Kuato's creepiness, and all. So, grab your favorite drink, find your coziest chair, and join us for a session of film critique and hypothetical hijinks that's as refreshing as an ice-cold beer on a hot Texas day.
Now, folks, have you ever imagined what it'd be like if 'Total Recall' had a heart transplant, swapping brawn for emotion? Hold onto your hats as we toss around a 'what if' scenario that'll have you questioning your own life choices. And because we can't resist, we're also serving up a side of laughter with a review of this Schwarzenegger classic—stunt mishaps, Kuato's creepiness, and all. So, grab your favorite drink, find your coziest chair, and join us for a session of film critique and hypothetical hijinks that's as refreshing as an ice-cold beer on a hot Texas day.
You start, though I really want to say wow, wow, wow, wow.
Speaker 2:Hey everyone, welcome to High and High Podcast, the only podcast keeping alive the fandom of George, that is the 1994 show of starring George Foreman. We're here keeping that alive and going.
Speaker 1:I mean honestly, george Foreman is possibly the most relatable boxing star. Slash announcer, slash grill salesman, yeah easily, easily.
Speaker 2:I think we all see a little bit of ourselves in George and I think.
Speaker 1:That's why I say so prolific. Yeah, it's a shame the fan trip isn't where it used to be. I say that this podcast might be its inroad back into America's hearts.
Speaker 2:There it is this one's for you, george. So I'm your host, Ryan Baird North. With me is always James Crossland. James, what's going?
Speaker 1:on Not much. It's raining here in Southern California so I couldn't do anything outside today. So I'm happy to get high and talk about total recall. Oh, and last episode we talked about me making that big pot of black beans when you were visiting. Didn't we have that Costa Rican dish, the gallo pinto, with the? Rice and beans and bacon. How was that? Did you enjoy that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was very good, it was very good.
Speaker 1:I really like it and that's what we do with our big pot of black beans. We have to have it this morning after like a couple months and I haven't, and it's just like so fucking good.
Speaker 2:Very nice, well, congratulations. So I'm still coming at you from this hotel in Northern Texas where the food isn't as good as all that, so just trying to make it by doing the best I can out here.
Speaker 1:It's like any rural place right Rural food is like 95% of all rural restaurants have the blandest food you've ever eaten in all your life and then, like every once in a while, there's a gem.
Speaker 2:But man, they just they hate seasoning. They really do. That is what. And they love refried beans just love them. So, anyway, for those of you joining us for the first time, we're high and dry. We're going to talk about total recall this week. We're gonna bust into some philosophies and pop culture. We're gonna talk it all out, and what makes it so fun and enjoyable is that we're gonna do a drunk and hot.
Speaker 1:Come on, don't bullshit us.
Speaker 2:Not really. We're gonna do a drunk and hot. So if you're listening on your way to work, pull over, take your shots. You don't wanna be driving while you do that. We're gonna line them up now.
Speaker 1:Oh, so this week I don't have anything super, so they have some parties in Southern California. I'm gonna plug you here Cush Babes. If you're in Southern California, Cush Babes are an awesome organization that puts on like cannabis events and they have people who come in with their products and they have like sexy parties and stuff. It was a real blast. I went to Cushmas, which was in January, and I got a goodie bag and so I got some of these things called Dizzies that are infused with. Like these ones are sour apple infused. I assume it's just shit cannabis. It doesn't have like a strain or anything, so I assume it's just not, and the good thing about it is it's got sour apple infusion in it.
Speaker 2:Very nice. Well, I'll be joining you with Redwood Empire. The pipe dream, bourbon whiskey, nice the power of imagination makes us infinite is on the front here, yeah.
Speaker 1:Abraham Lincoln.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's a 45%er, so yeah, it's got like a whole thing on here about the land of ancient giants and no, really yeah. Are they?
Speaker 1:like Enochian? Are they like Gnostic Christians or what?
Speaker 2:No, they're talking about the Redwoods themselves.
Speaker 1:Oh, they're talking about trees, oh yeah, I thought they were like Gnostic Christians, talking about, like you know, the books that were left out of the Bible.
Speaker 2:They talked about giants the Nephilim. No, they just make whiskey with very odd choice and they were just free folks. So yeah, I don't know. We're gonna see how it goes.
Speaker 1:So I'll let you know.
Speaker 2:All right, this first one this week goes out to our film, the 1990 Total Recall he used to do that, cheers.
Speaker 1:You know, I was really surprised to see that this movie was from the year 1990. I thought it was older. I thought it was an 80s movie, I mean, I guess taking a shot at this.
Speaker 2:It definitely played like one. It definitely played like one. Yeah, I got a lot to say about that too.
Speaker 1:The sneak dazzling veneer of the 1980s, the 1980s.
Speaker 2:Oh my God. So how was your Strainless hit right?
Speaker 1:there Tastes like sour apple. The flavor is pretty good. I would say it's kind of like, you know, when people talk about flavored nicotine, it's like it's not about the quality of the nicotine, it's about the flavor. I don't know how good this cannabis is. I've smoked the. You know they come in a cigarette form. I actually chopped it up and put it in my pipe, but I don't think it's the highest quality cannabis. Just it tastes good though.
Speaker 2:And sometimes it's all in there.
Speaker 1:Tastes artificial Yum. Yeah, this tastes like.
Speaker 2:It's hard to say. So it went down. It had definitely a bite at the back end, but it's almost got a sort of a rye feel to it. It almost tastes like a rye versus a bourbon. I'm not much of a rye guy myself, so we'll find out if I like it a little more. On this second go here. So this is real quick. We'll see who the second shot's going out to. It's going to be our newest listeners, wherever they happen to be in Hartford, Connecticut.
Speaker 1:It's the oh shit, the insurance companies are coming after us yeah.
Speaker 2:Here's to them Cheers, Cheers. Very, I definitely definitely prefer the brothers bond that I was doing yesterday.
Speaker 1:I gotta tell you, when this is smoked not as a cigarette, because I like I chopped open a cigarette Roll, the joint roll when it's smoked not in that form it like Goes to ash so quickly I don't know what about it. I is different. I because I assume because it's not as tightly compacted but does not smoke well out of a pipe.
Speaker 2:So Well, looks like we're both suffering here, then, so it's not suffering.
Speaker 1:I'm still high. It's the good.
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah, I'm just not feeling this one as much. It's just Not doing it, for I'll mix this with something. I'll mix it with something it won't go to waste. So this one, this one, goes out to the sleek, dazzling veneer of the 1980s. Cheers definitely what created this movie.
Speaker 1:I Mean sure, this movie is a product of the 80s, but it's also a product of the amazing mind of Paul Verhoeven. I Gotta say big fan, big fan, big Paul Verhoeven fan really. Oh yeah, I gotta say a lot of his movies I really enjoyed. Okay name 12. I Don't know if he's done 12 movies, but he did Robo cop to. He did Basic instinct he did.
Speaker 2:that's where a Sharon stone that's where Sharon stones in this one?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and he did Starship troopers, which has a lot of people from this movie yeah, yeah, mm-hmm. Okay, he's, did the fog, he did the howling, he did a lot of pretty good movies, yeah, yeah well, I think it's time to start cracking this bad boy open.
Speaker 2:So for those of you joining us who made it through the shots and all that fun stuff, it's time to break in a total recall. We're gonna do this by breaking it down to three parts. That first part are our sober thoughts and reflections. The second part of this are going to be our enlightened thoughts, once we have total recalled. And and then the last, we're gonna do a little what if, where? We're gonna insert ourselves into the sleek, dazzling Mars of 1990.
Speaker 1:So I was wrong there. He didn't do the howling or the fog, that's actually someone else associated this production. But he did do hollow man with Kevin Bacon, which I enjoy and show girls. He did show girls, really he did show girls. Yeah, he did the original Robo cop also. So yeah, very, very good. I I definitely like his movies.
Speaker 2:Okay, well, let's break into it. Well, what are your sober thoughts on total recall?
Speaker 1:my sober thoughts on total recall, I would say I I First watched this movie like I've seen clips of it and stuff before, but I watched this movie for the first time a few months ago and it was like this movie hit me perfectly. I love this movie Really, I think. Yes, I really do, and and I'm glad that there seems to be a disagreement here because we can talk about the reasons but I feel like this movie is really surreal. I feel like it's that I, you know, when I went into this movie, I knew there was some contention about like, is this all in his head? Is it part of the recall? Is it actually, you know, is it true, what's happening to him? And I've got a lot of awesome thoughts about that. I feel like I want to save him for the, for the high portion, just to kind of, you know, because they're more like their higher thoughts.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. Well then, yeah, just my off-the-cuff you know sober feelings on it. The, the body horror was bizarre.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:It definitely created a Entirely unique voice for this film.
Speaker 1:Yes, the guy who did it. His name is Rob bot and I got in my notes here. He was the one who was who did the work on the fog in the howling. I mix them up. He also did the thing he did mimic he did. He did interspace the prosthetics for all those movies. This dude is like. He gives such a unique voice in the print, in the prosthetics, to every movie.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, no, now that you mentioned the thing, I definitely see where there there's a link there. Yeah, we have the body. Horror was wild. Yes, it was wild and it's such a strange place for it.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Immediate thoughts. He also has testicles of steel. I he got like close-up camera just fucking Whacked in the balls multiple times.
Speaker 1:The two nut kicks were so funny.
Speaker 2:Oh my god, never slowed him down, it's just so good, I got him again in the balls later on, and he's definitely pissing blood like no doubt about it. I.
Speaker 1:Can see why someone wouldn't like this movie. I can see why someone would think this movie is like they're like this movie is just so it's dumb, it's like way over the top and it's like it's it's nonsensical and and the things are. So you can like see the seams sometimes of the movie and and I Can understand why someone would not like that and but I I have ideas on why that might be a Really good thing that actually elevates the movie.
Speaker 2:Interesting. Okay, well it's. It sounds like you're. You're almost there and ready to jump in. Let me. Let me just see if I have any more Immediate thoughts on it the only black guy in the movie is a racist caricature. Yeah, yeah, that was definitely true, that was definitely true.
Speaker 1:That's, that's what we can't let the movie go without mentioning it.
Speaker 2:Nope In the beginning. I love how we're all just supposed to accept that His muscles are totally normal.
Speaker 1:That's what a construction worker looks like. There's a range of construction workers from a divan Danny DeVito, esk, man, darnal sorts of nigger he.
Speaker 2:He was surrounded by DeVito Eskian people at his job, but then he's just like oiled up and has. It's just ridiculous. You know he has to shop at like big and tall for men just to Fucking cover it all is so he looks like he's wearing garbage bags the whole film.
Speaker 1:You know, sometimes there's just people like that. I don't know if you've worked a lot of jobs, you know, have you ever worked a job and there's just been a guy there who's like ripped?
Speaker 2:because I have there's been ripped guys, but mr Olympia has never been standing there.
Speaker 1:I Mean, yeah, but that requires it's just who Arnold is, you know, yeah, he Arnold's there for the second part. That's the important thing that had. He goes to recall.
Speaker 2:I would have been totally fine with it all they had to do so in the beginning. When he like eats, drinks some random breakfast beverage. If instead she was like passing him plates of chicken breast More chicken than he can eat at any time. And he's just fucking chowing down on chicken breast and like he guzzles a protein shake, then I'm like, okay, yeah, he's clearly that's part of his character. He, he works on that, that, but just that just hurt to be normal.
Speaker 1:That drink had 1200 grams of protein. You don't know, it's the future.
Speaker 2:That's true. That's true. So I just have to assume that that was a future protein shake, okay, well, well, would that be in such? It's time now to transfer into our Enlightened thoughts. It is time for us to total recall this total recall, and to have one more.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's right. Oh man, I'm pretty high. This dizzy, these dizzy's got me pretty high pretty quickly. For those of you who are, who are, who are users of cannabis, smoking a joint or a blunt or something is like such a waste. Most of it just burns off into the air. Ryan knows he's smoked tobacco a little bit, but in a pipe, because, guess what? A pipe is way better and way more economical for smoking anything. Use a pipe.
Speaker 2:Use a pipe people. If we wanna share anything on this show, it's definitely that. So here's to pipe users into Arnold Schwarzenegger's shattered testicles.
Speaker 1:Cheers.
Speaker 2:Oh, oh, my All right. Well, let's dive on in. So you've total recalled what are your-.
Speaker 1:And just picture me right now I'm so high. Picture me in that scene where he lays back into the machine and I love this shot, by the way. He lays back into the machine and there's this parallax where it zooms, where it zooms toward him while he moves away and then the back expands. That's the transition for the movie from the real world to the surreal world. It's such a good shot. I love that shot.
Speaker 2:Okay, all right. Well, continue please. What are your enlightened thoughts?
Speaker 1:Okay. So here's my argument for why this movie is good and it's that scene specifically. Before that scene we don't see anything surreal, everything is just like it's futuristic, right, and they talk about conflict on Mars and they talk about maybe discovering something alien. But I wanna look at that in the context of, like, the way our current times look at it. If you see something in the news and it's like, oh, they found something alien, you know somewhere, it doesn't matter, like when they sent a satellite to Pluto or whatever, they're like, oh, there might be alien shit. And it's like, yeah, there was no alien shit. We.
Speaker 1:It's nonsense, it's sensationalism that comes with any kind of reporting. And if you take it that way at the beginning and then there's nothing surreal, there's nothing surreal before that shot where everything, where the scene moves irregularly in a way that's like almost grating to you because it's moving you to the surreal. And after that, that's when all the crazy shit happens, where the doctor like calls the tech a dumb bitch and then the tech yeah, that was wild and slaps the intern. That's the transition to the surreal. And when you see that and you're like and you make that cognizant decision to look at it that way you can start to infer some things about the world. So this is where I, like, am really jumping into the deep end about why I think this surreal, kind of campy kind of you can see the scenes in the plot and the movie and even the scenery why that's a good thing and why it was, I think, intentional.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:So think about this tech company, recall. Right, he hears about it on some ad on the subway, so it's just like an ad. We see ads all the time. If you turn on like, let's say, let's put old people plopped in front of Fox News every five seconds is a fucking mesothelioma ad. Or like trying to sell them some gadget. That's what Recall is. Recall is that kind of company and he talks about it with one of his coworkers. One of his coworkers says I knew a guy who did that. You gotta fucking lobotomy, don't like. This is a sleazy company that advertises on the train and it'll give you a good deal just 1200 credits for us to fuck around in your head.
Speaker 1:And think about any tech company like Elon Musk who doesn't give a shit about the safety of his patients, or like the quality. Just on Reddit today there was someone who did like a test where they put a carrot into one of the under, like the closing mechanism for the automatic closing on the Cybertruck, and it like sliced the thick carrot, just completely shredded it, and that could have been your finger, yeah. So if you think of Recall like that kind of shitty tech company, the thing they're putting into his brain is pulpy. It's like low grade, low fidelity, put together as fast as possible, really just in your face, and loud and surreal because they don't. They're not like committed to the quality of a reality product. And when you look at it like that, I think it makes this movie so good. When you see like, when you just look in your like, oh, that's exactly what a shitty pulp romance or action thing that some tech company would shove into your head. That's exactly what it would be like.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, and that's a solid point, and I definitely appreciate the movie for what it is, don't Get Me Wrong and there were definitely parts of it I enjoyed For me, I think, one of the. So I'm just looking at my notes and yeah. And one of my notes is that I was surprised, so you remember the scene in the Mars terminal where he's disguised as a woman.
Speaker 1:Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2:At one point the bad guy says I'll arrest him. I mean her. It was wild that he was respecting that. At that moment Arnold identified as a woman.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, yeah, that's exactly right. I think that's actually a really good point, and I was also watching Con Air yesterday and they did it in Con Air, where he changed. It was like, is this good or is this bad? There's good parts, bad parts. He liked to change his amount of violence based on someone's gender identity and I was like hooray, I guess.
Speaker 2:You know we had just started making these little baby steps. But then, so I, after I watched it, something kind of stuck out to me. So this was definitely a product of the 80s and it was still just fucking littered with 80s hedonism.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Where.
Speaker 1:You always needed about, let's say, one and a half times the amount of what you loved.
Speaker 2:But it's just the concept that here comes the white man, he rolls up into a place where hedonism is provided and then everyone else obviously doesn't wanna be there but they're gonna give him a great fucking time, right, and it just sort of got me thinking that I could not think of an 80s sci-fi movie that didn't portray the future as this dystopian thing. Right, it's like, because it was all about the hedonism, it was all about the way they were going, and it occurs to me that the way their media was every time they depicted the future it was gonna be bad. They knew they were fucking everything up.
Speaker 1:Hmm.
Speaker 2:That's interesting. They knew and I searched and the only thing I could find was one kid show about the robot who gained sentience in the military and Star Trek but Star Trek doesn't fucking count because that was 60s and that was Jetsons and they always felt that the future was actually going to be positive.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's an interesting idea. I think there are Positive future stuff out there, but it depends on what you think of as positive. Right, there are some people who would, who would say that, you know, minority report or something like that is even positive. Like there are so many technological advances and and people, the quality of life for people improves dramatically. But because one thing is wrong, it's it's a dystopia. You know, I think if you looked back at like the 1920s and they were able to look forward in the future and see what we have now, if the story focused on something bad about the life at that time, like, let's say, you know, we're devoid of culture because of, you know, advertising that's shoved in our faces on our phone 24-7, that kind of like tears any kind. It Consumerizes culture and therefore culture has no room to grow.
Speaker 2:Like, yeah, people are gonna be like, oh, that's a dystopia, even though it's like I would rather live now than 1920, you know Well, one thing I did appreciate about total recall was that there were many references to both sides of the coin in this world.
Speaker 2:Yeah like so he? He rolls up in on Mars, there's a huge explosion and the super racist depiction cast taxi drivers like welcome to Mars. This is just how we live, yeah, yeah. But then when he's talking to the dude who is running the show and he explains to him that you know, you get the side of you. You've forgotten. We're friends. Man, he drives to work in a Mercedes. His house is fucking huge.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and a beautiful. They even say, like in the part where he comes in later. It's like you got a beautiful wife waiting for you on the outside, like you have a nice job. Amazing wife, let's just go, just take the pill and you don't have to live this fantasy man.
Speaker 2:Yeah and well, that was the plan. That would like that. That was like that was what the 80s plan was for For for three titty girl. Her life is gonna suck. But you're not three titty girl, bro. You're the dude who's rolling in with your Mercedes and your money paying for her to do weird shit with her three titties.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And it is it?
Speaker 1:is that that 80s like they're be totally insatiable? Yeah, you, nothing will ever, say you. You could have Sharon stone at home and you would still be unhappy.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes. Well then that I immediately you know, even just even ignoring that you have Sharon stone at home.
Speaker 1:You know, peak Sharon stone, it definitely watch her, watch her practice tennis all day. I'm telling you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, that's why it took me so long to finish the fucking movie when and when she's like doing the thing, where she's like tying her wrists up with her with her bra there, anyway she's such an amazing actress.
Speaker 1:You know that she is you can say you can say like that's like Sleazy or whatever. She's both sleazy and demure. He has already got what he wants.
Speaker 2:It's fucking wild yeah well, but then it does at the same time it sort of taps into what a lot of us are feeling, as we're kind of just going through a Life that we didn't quite anticipate, and it taps into that you know that quiet little dream that any minute now we're gonna remember that oh wait, I'm actually a secret agent and you know, and so I definitely see the relatableness that they were like of that little sort of undercurrent of culture that they were tapping into and went with, and then they just got all fucking Wild with it and things make her easy.
Speaker 2:So I do see that as well.
Speaker 1:Paul Verhoeven, though, as a director, is commenting on this kind of thing, like he did Robo cop, which I think for a lot of people are like they don't get the undertone that it's like a terrible thing, like judge dread. Yeah, robo.
Speaker 1:Pop is just yeah mm-hmm, and it's a criticism of Policing culture and and American culture of the time. And this is like a Criticism of those things and I think it's really difficult to see it because the movie's so surreal that you're not sure what it means. You're not sure what it's trying to say. But Paul Verhoeven is a very critical director. Starship Troopers is also a satire on fascism, like I love this director man.
Speaker 2:I love fucking doogie how's. Or looked like a Nazi, that whole fucking movie. It yeah, it was For sure. And it brings up a thing that I just sort of been thinking lately is that I feel that Society is not responsible enough to have Judge dread, or because you had brought up judge dread to me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I did and or.
Speaker 2:And every time I see a stand-up comedian I'm like society is not responsible enough to have this, that we are Incapable, as a larger group, of looking at something so like just take judge dread, for example of looking at it saying that was fun for a minute but it's totally wrong. I can, I can take the entertainment value, but I'm not now gonna go on a podcast and start saying we need a judge dread police state to stop all these criminals. No, I accept it for entertainment, compartmentalize it where it belongs, accepting all the wrong in it. But society can't do that.
Speaker 1:And now we have fucking Joe Rogan and Fox News and and they say they're being offensive and pushing the boundaries of comedy because that's necessary. But I can point you to someone who is offensive in a way that isn't derogatory toward people who have been threatened in the past by society Trevor Moore. I just watched an episode of the Trevor Moore Show where it's about offensive jokes and he does the whole thing about offensive jokes and I'll tell you one of the jokes where it's like it doesn't punch down on anybody. It was. Did you know that animals are only like three years old at the max? So I guess I'm a pervert in two different ways, which was a great joke.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, I'm a Trevor Moore fan for sure, and it's so sad he cut out early.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's a great offensive joke. It doesn't punch down at anyone. It subverts what you're thinking in a way that doesn't hurt a minority. It's like fucking wild that these people their excuses we are keeping. We have to be offensive in order to challenge the sensibilities of our time. It's like the sensibilities of our time are too racist already. You're not challenging anything.
Speaker 2:No, it's just yeah. No, especially if you were trying to challenge sensibilities and then you get a whole group of people going. I agree with what this guy's saying. He's got some good points. You're not challenging anything. You're just starting a meeting and things have gone off the rails.
Speaker 1:A rally, if you will.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you just started a rally, that's all it was. So, no, you're not doing that anymore. There is no dip joke out there at this point that hasn't been told Right. So it's like come on, you got to be smarter than that, you got to come up with something a little more beyond that. For sure and that was just one of my thoughts was I feel like me sitting here, I can watch it, I can note what the director was trying to say, I can note the rights and wrongs about it, and then I can enjoy it for what it is, but it's not going to alter my political views.
Speaker 1:Right, yeah, exactly, and yeah, I think you're totally right Is that it's propaganda. They like to present themselves as not having an agenda or anything, but they do have an agenda and it's really fucked up that they have an agenda and they're saying they don't. And I think that's one of the. I think that kind of lack of respect between humans is really holding us back. People are so so they obfuscate their goals so much for personal gains. Still, it's like come on, guys.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and like even watching total recall, like what kind of just made me sort of feel sorry, kind of skeezy about it was, you know, when we went into these places and the only dude having a good time is the one guy. Now I feel, 30 years later, 34 years later, we can at least start to. We've started to accept that like, hey, it's still fun to be, you know, wild and reckless and, you know, slutty in this bar, but as long as everyone is in on it. You know, not like, we all love to party, we all love these things, we love doing these dirty things, but as long as we're all consenting. You know, no one here is being paid, no one here is against their will. We're all in it together and we just weren't quite there yet.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think that it's important to. I don't like Arnold Schwarzenegger's character. Are you looking at this through the lens that you're supposed to like Arnold Schwarzenegger's character? Like he's, like he's. He's a representative of you as the viewer.
Speaker 2:Well, I mean that's. I mean just because in the beginning, when you know they try and like, do that the whole concept of he's monotonous and he's dreaming of escaping it we all are, and so we start to immediately relate to him. But then you got it, but by the time he was on the screen grinning like a jackass at himself. That's when you realize that you're looking at a mirror of this guy and he's not a good person.
Speaker 1:Right, yes, he's a. He's a piece of shit who's bored with his amazing life, like he's got a great life and he's bored by it and it's. I don't like him as a character. Every time he makes a decision in this movie. I'm like God's guys, such a fucking idiot, you know and like, and I'm like this guy is such a sleaze ball and who who doesn't give a shit about anyone but himself and I think about that. That's how I think about him in the movie. But I still love the movie because I feel like the movie is like this guy is. This is this guy's fantasy and this guy's a dumb. He's guys, an idiot and a piece of shit. Well, I mean, he's fantasy.
Speaker 2:It started with him. Immediately he went to go pay a thousand credits or whatever it was, to emotionally cheat on Sharon Stone Right, and then he went to a level where he would always have that memory but not feel responsible for it.
Speaker 1:And he told his. He told Sharon Stone like you know, I was thinking about doing this recall and she was like I'd really rather you didn't, like they're going to go inside your head and stuff, and I we don't know what that does, because because, as you know from his coworker, this fucks people up sometimes and and he does it anyway behind her back because he feels unfulfilled if he doesn't have a vacation to Mars. Yeah, and, and so that's what you think of the character, if you, if you visualize the character that way and think that you're supposed to, instead of saying like it's an older movie. They were idiots in the past and they didn't realize how shitty their culture was. If you go, all right, this is a criticism by Paul Verhoeven on the shittiness of this culture. Yeah, I think it really elevates the movie.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, and then I think they could have taken it one little step further. Just a nail at home at the end, when he she's like you, better kiss me. Before you realize this is a dream.
Speaker 1:Have him.
Speaker 2:If they have him, show that it. Or just to like, have Sharon Stone come in and this douchebag is been lobotomized at the place where she said you shouldn't go there. Yeah, you know, and it's like you shouldn't have gone there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they decided to leave.
Speaker 2:They decided to leave it ambiguous. Yes, I think that was to reach, you know, the audience, who's not responsible enough for this movie?
Speaker 1:I think maybe you're right on that case, because think about his other movies that we talked about. Both Robocop and Starship Troopers are beloved movies by the exact people that they're parodying. Yeah, so, man, I have to agree with you that he did not take it far enough in a responsible way. He should have. There should have been a resolution that that had him suffer, but but you know, if you're trying to depict the reality of an arc like that realistically, nothing happens to him. He just he's just like all right, good memories. Wow, this lying to my wife was great and I'm going to do it again.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Well, because like how long until he does that Malina or the new agent he's with you know, because obviously there's a hole inside you that you well even in his, even in his fantasy.
Speaker 1:Everyone was like listen, you've let all of us down with your selfishness. Like that was in his own fantasy. Malina fucking told him that.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:And it's like ah, we forgive you.
Speaker 2:Well, end of the. The 2012 version of Total Recall. They tried to correct basically a lot of what we were talking about here, and then they were trying to update it for 2012. But then they sucked out all of the soul that was put in and so it became the Arnold Schwarzenegger that was the Irish guy.
Speaker 1:Colin Farrell.
Speaker 2:Colin Farrell was a much more likable character in this one, but the movie itself had lost a lot of the soul of the original Total Recall. From what I understand, it is closer to the novel, but I never. I never read the novel to actually be able to comment on that.
Speaker 1:You know, and I don't know if the novel would actually reflect Paul Verhoeven's vision of it being a satire and stuff, because guess what, starship Troopers was not the satire that Paul Verhoeven made. It was like, legitimately, like I think a fascist government would be a military, a military government would be the best government was what the author thought, and it would achieve the goal the best and fastest. And Paul Verhoeven was like no, I'm this is, I want to, I want to satirize this by by showcasing it. Yeah, and it really can. You're right that it confuses audiences.
Speaker 2:No, you have to be able to look at things critically, and I feel that just human beings do not, and so a lot of our media. We're not responsible enough for it.
Speaker 1:No, no, and it sucks because, like you see, shit like the look on his face as he gets lowered back to the scene is like you know, like, like the ridiculous look. And some people like, wow, wouldn't that be amazing? And I'm sitting here thinking, wow, what a horrifying trend like transition yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2:Well, it's time to move into our final portion of this. It's time to get into our what ifs. We definitely were burning into that Enlightened thoughts.
Speaker 1:There we got total recall, you dumb bitch.
Speaker 2:That was like that was a wild scene. That was a wild scene. Well, so what if you were there?
Speaker 1:Oh man, you know, that scene was so crazy. It really set the tone for me because I felt like that encapsulated the surreality, right, yeah, yeah. But I don't know, I feel like I feel like when he popped up and he was like, hey, listen, you're still at recall, you're suffering in embolism I would have been like, oh shit, oh no, my wife's here. Oh no, I feel guilty. I went behind her back. You would have had a breakdown. Yeah, I would have had a breakdown, I would have. And also, did the matrix steal the pill thing from total recall? Holy shit, did you see that coming when he offered him the red pill? They like stole that, the matrix, like stole the idea.
Speaker 2:The best ideas, the best things that we have. We were just talking. So, after the camera cut on our Dune episode, we were talking about Star Wars and it was just an updated Dune, you know? Yeah, that's all it is. You just got to steal with style.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you got to steal what's best and then make it better.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Well, during that part I probably would have taken that pill because I really I would have been in touch with reality, I'd hope.
Speaker 2:Well, that, instead of the sorry good. Oh well, that makes you such a better guy, because he just glosses over the fact he had eight years implanted or not, eight years of marriage with this woman whom he is just able to face. Push off of him, and I'm not a guy that he's never met in the head.
Speaker 1:Sharon Stone Just like, get out of my face, woman.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, and it's just like so. Definitely there would have been a different movie, inserting you and empathetic, compassionate human being into the scene who screwed up.
Speaker 1:He married Sharon Stone when she was like 16. How old do you think she was in this movie? Because they were married for eight years she was 30. Oh, Sharon Stone was supposed to be 30 in that movie. Was she actually 30? She was actually 30. Oh my God.
Speaker 2:I know. So they married when she was 22.
Speaker 1:Wow, well, that's shocking. Sharon Stone was a smoke show, yeah. Yeah, that was nice and she knew it and they really like threw it around the film. How much of a smoke show she was.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, no yeah, then that would have been my. What if I?
Speaker 1:No, I'm just gonna stay with my wife.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't want to go to Mars, I'm gonna get back to it.
Speaker 1:This might be a little too personal. Well, no, never mind. I was gonna say that you've talked about starting a revolution elsewhere, so I think that maybe you would want to go to Mars. Wait, does this mean you've done some reflecting on some of these dreams that you've had in the past? Because that would be interesting. Well, so no, I have not grown, I have not reflected on shit.
Speaker 2:All right, but what would have realistically happened? Though I've been with Sharon Stone for eight years, right Kudos to me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so you would be Arnold Schwarzenegger in this movie.
Speaker 2:No, I would. Then you know what? Sharon Stone doesn't want me to go to Total Recall. I'm feeling something inside. I'm going to go back to school, I'm going to get a degree maybe, and I'm going to get a different job and me and Sharon Stone are going to be happy somewhere else where I can be happy.
Speaker 1:Oh, I see you want to shake it up first.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm, yeah, not with the recall. No, I would not go to the recall.
Speaker 1:What if you had to be in the recall? What would you do differently?
Speaker 2:Okay. So if I've already done that, I've recalled. I mean I definitely think I would take a much more Colin Farrell approach to it and I definitely hope that my martial arts skills would be on the 2012 level versus the 1990 level.
Speaker 1:Well, you can do anything of these Like it's your dream.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Well then I look it would definitely be more of the Colin Farrell style thing of it. Plus, I'm there now and I have the power to inflict my change, my revolutionary change. I'm definitely going to inflict it, no doubt.
Speaker 1:Right right.
Speaker 2:But you'll definitely see a much more darker version of the movie, where I go through a lot of emotional struggle and emotional trauma, like when my wife of eight years walks in and is trying to talk me out of this. I understand that she's a spy. It's going to be a very emotional scene. It's not just going to be fuck off woman and then kill a guy.
Speaker 2:No, it's going to be traumatic, it's going to be dark, it's going to be like if total recall meets the fucking watchman. You know it's going to be. It's going to be hard to watch.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's going to. It's going to pull your heartstrings.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, it's going to be trials and tribulations.
Speaker 1:This one did not pull on any heartstrings.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:I was. I was actually tired by the time I watched, by the time this movie ended, I was. I was like tired because there was just so much surreal shit happening from scene to scene and I was laughing so much.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah.
Speaker 1:And by the end I was tired. Yeah, I liked this movie a lot.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, and that would be my main. What if you throw me in this at that Sharon Stone scene where she comes in she's trying to talking out of it. It's going to be a scene where you see a man having to rip out eight years of love and caring, and so it's going to be a vicious, fucking brutal scene. And then when he arrives on Mars, you put me in that position. There we're going to explore a lot more of how this is disgusting and I need to tear it down. It would start to turn into like a terrorist propaganda film.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You know it would be a long ride.
Speaker 1:He was a terrorist leader.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, and I think my film, my what if would like try and make you, the viewer, a terrorist.
Speaker 1:Perfect yeah.
Speaker 2:It would be. There'd be a lot to digest in that one. It wouldn't be.
Speaker 1:And then at the end you wake up and you're like, ah yeah, finally I've led a revolution, Now I can just relax with Sharon Stone.
Speaker 2:I would go home and I would apologize.
Speaker 1:I feel fulfilled now, though, sweetheart, like I feel totally fulfilled. This is all I've wanted was lead one revolution and crushed my enemies and free my peers, and I need to go see a therapist.
Speaker 2:This shit happened in there and I feel like my heart's been ripped apart, so excuse me.
Speaker 1:I'm so happy to see you. I'm so glad you're alive.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then she's going to be like, hey, you probably should have gone to a therapist first instead of total recall.
Speaker 1:But this seemed easier and like more fun. I'm so sorry, man, it seems so much easier.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I would have to. Yeah, so my what if? Would be a lot of time spent apologizing to Sharon Stone.
Speaker 1:Perfect.
Speaker 2:Well, did you have any final what ifs that you wanted to add before we close this bad way out?
Speaker 1:Let's see what ifs. No, I don't think I have any what ifs, but I do want to point out Sharon, my wife, she did say during one of the scenes they actually pick up the guns that the other people drop right away, which is more than you can say for most action movies.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that is true, they grabbed the guns.
Speaker 1:They grabbed the guns off the people. They knocked out immediately and I was like, yes, this is truly the smartest action movie characters ever.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, no, from someone who's been in a class like that, I can't tell you how much a professional would have it just ingrained in their heads, like it would be second nature, like breathing, to separate a corpse from the weapon that it held a minute ago.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it should be instinct.
Speaker 2:Mm, hmm, yeah, oh yeah, so it was separated from bodies immediately.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I would say. I would also say get your ass to Mars. I would also. The old lady who yelled fuck you at him after she stole his briefcase was very funny. She's so confused, fuck you.
Speaker 2:That was bizarre.
Speaker 1:That was so hilarious that was a trip the scene where, on the escalator, where he uses the guy as a human shield and he's like a hand burger by the time he drops it.
Speaker 2:Well, I like that he's hamburger. But the stuntman you think they entered that when he gets thrown, they started the shot too soon and you see the stuntman kick off. Yeah, propelling himself.
Speaker 1:It's so fucking funny. Oh my god, I love how funny this movie is and I totally believe it's intentional.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we have to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, all the exaggerated body of the throws get throwing people. That is great. Let's see what else do I have? Great Wait, a creepy little guy, what was his name?
Speaker 2:A Quata Quata. Yeah, quata, yeah, he's always great. He's always fantastic Well.
Speaker 1:Great.
Speaker 2:Well, there you go, folks. We've just listened to the evolution of Siskel and Ebert as we start tackling these films. This is what it's going to be. This is the new movie reviews. So thank you all so much for listening. We just tackled total recall. We're high and dry. Follow us, do all those things, appreciate you Bye.
Speaker 1:You stupid bitch.