Corey Boutwell Podcast
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Corey Boutwell Podcast
How To Make Friends As A Man #234
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put this position. You know what I mean. So I'm going to pay for this one and I'm like cool, that's like a piece of respect that you can get from other people of just a kind gesture. Thank you everyone tuning in for another Corey Batwell podcast, and today I'm here to talk to you about how to make friends as a man, especially in the modern world, because this day and age, what I've found out through working with my one-on-one clients and working with people in my community is people are struggling, people like I'm in.
Speaker 1:How do I meet amazing people? I want to rub shoulders with people who are successful. I want to be around people who are crushing it and killing it, but where are they at? Like, I want to talk to these people and now, with the rise of coaching, as I was talking about my one-on-one yesterday, and he's like man, I'm excellent, I make a lot of money, I crush it in areas and I'm trying to like just connect with people to make friendships and ask them like one or two questions and they're like bam, five thousand dollars. He's like fuck, I got a lot to offer as well. You know what I mean. So and I was like that, just that just tipped me off over the edge because I'm like all right, I'm gonna make this podcast because I know what that's like.
Speaker 1:It's sort of like a crisis happening in the world at the moment around this and I feel like a lot of people who are on the growth train when they're motivating and they're going and they're growing and they want to start being around better people to lift them up, it's not to feel like they actually need other people to lift them up because the people that they're around currently's mindsets aren't online with them. Now, that's not a bad thing. It doesn't mean you have to get rid of those people as friends. However, what it does mean is that you're going to start to feel drained, so you need to be around other people to lift you back up, which I think is really important, because we all want to network with studs who can push us and help us grow. So, essentially, without strong relationships and strong friendships, like where humans are, relationship people like for the history of time, relationships is everything. The reason that we do everything is to talk and communicate with other people and build relationships. It's so important. But without strong relationships and inspiring relationships, we're less motivated. We wake up with less energy. There is a lack of passion and competition, like healthy camaraderie and competition. You lift everyone up and then no one lifts you up, so you feel drained.
Speaker 1:As well as talking about before and what gets you lonely and isolating as hell, like you start feeling really isolated. There is a massive problem at the moment with the online entrepreneurs that I know come in big time and they're like man, where do I go to meet people? Right, like, like, like, where can I go to meet people? Right, like, where can I go to meet people in here? I don't know where to do it, I don't know what to happen and I'm actually quite fucking lonely, to be honest, and I get struggling. I get to the point in my business where I'm like, yeah, this is sick and I'm doing this all by myself and it's only so much validating you can do for yourself and piping and're like fuck, I can't get to share this experience with anyone, god damn.
Speaker 1:But then when you're around a group of studs and people who are crushing it and it lifts you up, you feel incredible. It's like man, I want to get to the next level. I feel motivated and pushed and yes, and come with me, let's go, and I'll push you and you push me. And let's keep getting up. Let's keep. Don't have that and we don't fill up our own cup. We cap our potential and we don't get what we want. We aren't as fit, healthy, mentally strong or as emotionally smart as what we need, right? And then what happens, obviously, is our relationships are shittier. We start struggling with success, we start struggling to show up in a body that we want because we're deflated, and I strongly believe in the whole motivation and discipline thing in both areas.
Speaker 1:People like motivation isn't real. I believe in parts of that and agree with some parts of it. Some people also believe that discipline isn't real, and I agree with different parts of that as well, and the argument is like motivation is not real and you should rely on discipline to get you to where you want to go. Yep, there's parts that I agree in that. Other people believe that discipline isn't a thing and you should just be doing what you want to do because you're already so inspired that you don't have to think about doing them. Right? I agree with both.
Speaker 1:However, what I find is that discipline will only last so long and motivation will only last so long you can work on, you know for five, 10 years and have no acknowledgement, no motivation, nothing else, and then your life is purely pain and suffering. You don't get anything out of it. Then you end up bitter, right. And if you start ending up bitter because of that, what was the point? If you don't have, so that's like without the motivation, and if you don't have any discipline and you run off of all motivation, then you're just leaving everything up to chance, you're off with the fairies and you're not going to get the results that you most want to get. So I believe in both, and being able to use them is fantastic, especially when you're held accountable by having inspiring friendships. And that's what can help both. They get you motivated and inspired and they keep you disciplined and they hold you accountable. So that's why we want to use them, because most of the time well, I understand this is really cool, as most people listen to this. This is really powerful.
Speaker 1:Okay, we also commonly don't want to make new friends as we don't want to make. We also commonly don't want to make new friends as we don't want our old friends. I'm going to say this again we commonly don't want to make new friends out of fear that we won't be able to keep our current friends. That's the quote. We commonly don't want to make new friends out of fear that we won't be able to keep our current friends and the bonds and the connections and the relationships that we've built with people in that. So what that does is that prevents us from making new connection, and we stay with our old friends when that's a toxic, limiting belief that completely stunts our growth. You can have old friends and friends that last a long period of time and you can have new people that can help, you know, fill your cup. And if your old friends aren't filling your cup as much as what you need, like that's completely fine. You don't have to judge them or make them feel bad for that. Um, you can find new friends that are going to inspire you and lift up your cup, which is the best thing ever. This is the history of time.
Speaker 1:Like philosophers, I study a lot of philosophy. If you don't know me, I study heaps of philosophy and Socrates and Plato and all those guys back in the day, aristotle, even JR Tolkien who wrote Lord of the Rings and the guy who wrote Narnia I forgot his name, christopher, something. They were best friends and they say that they wouldn't have been able to finish the books that they finished without each other drafting each other's work all the time as mates. Right? Such healthy competition there, right, just like supporting and pushing each other through. Old school philosophers would just walk around all day, every day, with their friends. They'd be training and they'd be thinking. They'd walk around trying to define things right and they'd make arguments back and forth and they would disagree with each other, they would hate on each other, they would love on each other and, regardless if they were inspiring or not, they had the communication and conversations to be like hey, you're like. You know, you're not inspiring me right now. I'm going to go do this or meet with these people or whatever it is, and when you do, come on back, which is completely fine, right, it's not necessarily you have to say that to someone or one of your friends, but it's just noticing that it's completely okay to move around with friendship groups and invest your time into other people because we grow.
Speaker 1:So for me personally, I've always had amazing friends, always will like. Always, like I move states, when, like I move states to Queensland, and whenever I go back home and I see my friends, it's literally like I've never left. I'm like, oh, this is, it's like the best thing ever. I'm like what's up now? And we start chatting and we have like the best you know conversations ever and it's super inspiring seeing people and how far they've grown since the last time I've seen them, because I don't talk to them too much when I'm up here, like digitally, I don't because, like most of the people I have friends with in like back home was I've been friends with them for like seven to 10 years, so we know each other so well. So when I go back, it's just like, oh yeah, here we go Straight back at it, which is great. And then, where I live now, I have amazing friends and I meet new friends and have a lot of powerful friends as well, and I've been able to connect with multimillionaires who have inspired me to go and chase my dreams and on the pursuit of making the millions myself living a dream life.
Speaker 1:I've also seen some of my friends who want to connect with more powerful people, like some friends close around me, and they've sacrificed their potential by trying to drag people up to their level when the other person doesn't want to grow or their timing's not right for them and I've seen them waste their energy and their time and their precious resources and it's prevented them from meeting other people. And I also see quite commonly as people feel too scared to go reach out and meet other people out of some fear of judgment, because they're like, oh, I want to be inspiring and maybe I'm not good enough, and blah, blah, blah, blah, and I'm like you're like the most inspiring person I've ever met. Oh my gosh. So it's crazy, right, how people have this sort of fear there. If they're not perfect, they can't be friends with people or they don't get to have a seat at the table, right? So I'm going to teach you guys in this podcast how to get that seat, cause I've connected with brilliant minds who have invested in me way more successful than me, invest into me and want to get into my circle and grow themselves. They're like man if I get around, corey, I'm going to grow.
Speaker 1:And it's happened like a thousand times with everyone. Like I had one of my friends moved in with me. He's got the job of his dreams. He put on 10 kilograms of muscle and is in like a relationship that he loved. Right, he just moved in with me and that will happen within a period of like 10 months. So I was, like, I was very happy with that. It's like, yeah, it was quite confirming to myself that like, hey, people around me win because I've got strong boundaries and high standards. I've also spent and that's why people invest in, you know, invest into me to mentor them, because not only can I help them here and here, but I help them in the real world as well by meeting and connecting them with amazing people. I've also spent a lot of thought into how I've been able to do this right, and I've also, like, I've spent a lot of thought into this and I'm going to give you guys practical tools that you can use to create more powerful relationships and friendships that are going to inspire you.
Speaker 1:So I'm going to kick this off with the most important thing to understand in this podcast, and it is the definition of friendship. If you do not understand the definition of friendship, how can you create new friendships? I'll just ask you guys the question to think to yourself for a second what is your definition of friendship? Is it love, trust, friendship, loyalty? They're all wrong, right? They're all wrong, and they're so wrong, right? They're parts of being in a relationship as a friend. But they're also so wrong, right. So sorry if I'm triggering you right now by saying that you're incorrect and now your whole thoughts of what a friendship is has been a lie and it's false. It's not. They are definitely parts that make it up, but this is what a true definition of friendship is, and it is mutual inspiration. This comes from the philosophy of Friedrich Nietzsche Mutual inspiration.
Speaker 1:I like hanging out with you because you inspire me. I like hanging out with you because you inspire me. You like hanging out with me because I inspire you. That's what fills the cup up. The key is inspiration. We both inspire each other some way, some form, so everything other, anything else, rather than that, is just draining.
Speaker 1:You can love someone, right, and you can love them and you can trust them and they can be loyal. But you can be around them and be like oh fucking hell, bro, your energy is the worst, and when their energy is bad, consistently for two, three years, you're like this is not supporting me. I love you, I trust you, you're loyal, you're like the best person ever. We connect, we bond, but I'm getting drained. I'm so drained. But if you're around someone who's inspiring as hell, you're like man. Every time I'm around you, I'm inspired. Are you drained? No, you're lifted up. So that's the commitment.
Speaker 1:So the question is is to understand as like okay, well, if I want to have awesome relationships and friendships, what do you have to do? Be inspiring as fuck, right, and that's authentically, it's honestly. It's a lot of a journey of becoming the most authentic version of yourself, because through that process, you're going to get rid of all the filters and you will be inspiring. Become who you are. Figure that person out. Do the little things, whether it's weighing yourself every morning, you know. Making your bed, your bed, clean room, journaling at night time, whatever things that you want to commit to. Like all those little small things to get it awesome. Body, you know. Create the job of your dreams. All these things make you super inspiring and your energy can be inspiring.
Speaker 1:A lot of people like to invest in myself and the community because they like my energy. So when I go teach or I run a workshop or a retreat or I'm helping some people and they're're like man, how do you have this like uh, uh energy and it's like well, I just like myself. I like myself and I know that I have to be inspiring if I want to meet other inspiring people. So me being inspiring is a decision that I'm making currently. Right, I'm making this decision to be inspiring so that I can be a weapon in shops. Other people go, wow, you know, being around, being around you is intoxicating and you inspire me. Right, that's not. It's not like oh, I have this hidden talent that I don't know. It's like I work on it every single day and I'm very proud and every time I get a compliment if someone goes oh cool, I really like your energy, or how do I get energy like yours, different to you in terms of energy? So I'm not encouraging you to go out there and be like you know, like me super enthusiastic and hyper, but I'm encouraging you to be as much as yourself as possible because you can be super inspiring, being calm, cool, headed and collected person. So whatever your personality is, it's maximizing that to become inspiring.
Speaker 1:So we can look into Greek myth for practical tips for this, and that is Greek myth talks a lot about what the ultimate person can do and there's all stories around Zeus and the gods and hosting and if you listen to any old school fairy tales, a lot of this. These rules are talked about in fairy tales. I believe it's just a guide for how to be an extremely awesome person that people want to be around, and it is committing to your own nobility, which is really interesting. Committing to your own nobility the more we can get away from our primitive, reactive impulses and savage type of nature to show up in a noble sense, we get more respect. That's not to say to ignore that part of ourself. We have to integrate that part of ourself by allowing it to come up and have practices where we can use it. It's just having control over our own savage and primal nature. There's areas, like sex, when you want to let all your primal nature out as best as possible. There's times when you're angry as hell and you want to let this savage primal nature out, to like express anger in a certain way, and you're allowed to do that. But when you're around, you know certain people and you have got control over those impulses and urges, you've gained nobility, which is awesome, right?
Speaker 1:So the thing in Greek myth is that demands respect from everyone is a strong body and a healthy mind. The Stoics embody that. Be a superb host. Right, being a superb host. How can you host as best as possible right this is people around for dinner, all the rest of it and also gain power. So having power, which is success or freedom, like all those different things lead to power, and then also confidence and charisma. So how you show up in a relationship, your commitment, your discipline, all those things can create power.
Speaker 1:Because someone who's in a relationship with Greek myth, every time they cheated on someone or did something else because there's a lot of cheating going on with the gods they would like sleep with everyone and the mortals and the stuff. It's crazy, but every time that happens, someone got bitten on the bum Like there'd be a huge consequence Someone. But every time that happened, someone got bitten on the bum Like there would be a huge consequence Someone would die, they'd have the worst thing ever happen to them. So being faithful is, I believe, is a really awesome way. That demands respect and power as well, because no one wants to be friends with someone.
Speaker 1:For example let's use an example of someone you don't want to be friends with is, let's say, a really super successful guy who's angry as hell all the time and is a slave to his own impulses. Right, you start hanging around someone like that. Let's say they're just basking in drugs, alcohol, prostitutes, and they're just angry and relentless and not do this fuck. That like very pushy on you and you start hanging out with someone like that and they're more successful than you are. They'll bring you down more quickly than anyone else due to your efforts of trying to keep up with the relationship with that person. You'll be spending more money, you'll be putting things out, you'll be indulging in practices and temptations that you shouldn't be indulging in. So be aware of that. Be aware of the successful, toxic people. They're not good to be around at all. They'll drag you down quicker because you start paying and getting into temptations when it'd be better off to be around your current friends and trying to lift them up rather than be somewhere around who's super successful and toxic, because if someone is beneath you and toxic, you're not going to hang around them.
Speaker 1:If you find yourself more in quote unquote superior to someone else in some way, like in all areas, if you're like okay, this person is like. They're not healthy, they're not successful, they're not inspiring, they're in a bad relationship, they're going for a breakup. They have been for like the last six years and they don't work on themselves, they don't invest in themselves, they smoke. I'm not going to be around this person, right? Why would I listen to this person? But if you're around someone who you really respect in regards to success and then they're like let's go out and smash seven bags of cocaine, go to an orgy, and who cares if you have sex with whatever sex it is, let's just go down and go nuts. You know that's going to drag you down really quickly, right? So be aware of the successful toxics. So here are six hacks that you guys can use, right? These are six things that you can use to be able to develop like tools that you can use Now, after hearing that.
Speaker 1:Two create relationships. Number one create your home environment to be an amazing place to invite people over. Because the second, that you meet some people, and this is talked about in Greek myth if people come to your place and it's shit, right, they come around. There's no fresh water to drink, there's not food or anything. The place is messy and gross and untidy. That is one of the biggest sins you can commit in Greek myth and you get kicked out of Olympus. You get smited down by a God. So in your own house, like this is what I have in my house. I have a gangster ice bath in a sauna.
Speaker 1:I used to have this thing called Frosty Fridays. Every single Friday everyone would come to my house, jump into the ice bath and it was a networking event We'd have like. Sometimes we'd have like 25 to 30 people just come into my house on a Friday. Other weekends we'd have like three or four just chilling out, but every single weekend we'd hang out. People go. Oh, I want to get around that because I want to meet other people. I was facilitating, I was hosting, I cooked dinner for everyone afterwards. I didn't care how much it cost me.
Speaker 1:I learned how to cook so I could cook up a storm. So people would go. Oh my God, so I learned how to cook like an absolute G. I believe anyone who tastes my cooking is purely blessed, and you can ask any of my friends and they'll say, yes, right, I learned how to cook because when people come around, I can cook something sick and they're like this is one of the best things I've ever tasted. This is fantastic. Wow, I want to go to Corey's place. I have power now.
Speaker 1:People, when they think about me, they hang around them more, and that happens quite regularly. People say that the house is beautiful, smells nice, there are places to sit, there's a whiteboard to jam on, I offer water, food and comfort so people can enjoy. I always leave things out for people. I have an outside area that's pretty and it makes people feel at home and they're like oh wow, the sun's here as well, and I live in a location where a walk to the coffee shop is spectacular, right, so just going for a walk from my house is fantastic. So having those things puts you in a position of power. You don't have to have those in particular. It's for you to create, like how do you want to host? Right? Having those things is an amazing way to develop especially long-lasting relationships. I have a podcast studio like this in my. So when you do make friends and have like formal get-togethers that you organize, it makes people want to come back, makes people want to be around you, which is really important.
Speaker 1:Practical tool number two upgrade your digital profile to Instagram or your Facebook, whichever one you use. If I can't see you digitally, then why the hell do I want to hang out with you, right? You're almost a ghost, unless you're like mad successful and you're trying to like keep people away and hide away. It's like that is one of the best places you can go to meet people. It's you don't have to post like an influencer, but it's a lot of people. If they want to meet people and go oh, I want to talk to you and talk to you, they're going to get to know you first. If they go into your Instagram or social media, they can find out who you are and they can see is this person inspiring or not? That's the question, right? Is it inspiring? They can be inspiring for vulnerability. They can be inspiring through their success. They can be inspiring through their body. They can be inspiring through their relationships. Whatever it is, as long as it's portrayed on social media and people can see, this is great.
Speaker 1:But the key is just authentic posting gives people the vibe that you're confident and you're not afraid to be seen for who you are. Everyone likes to be around people who are confident and not afraid to be seen who they are, because that is inspiring. And if you can just whip out your phone, talk, post yep, that was sick. Because you don't care, because you're confident enough in yourself, people are going to want to get around you. It demonstrates mental strength and confidence, which is really cool. Hack number three or tool number three compliment others and introduce yourself Simple, so genius though. And others and introduce yourself Simple, so genius though. So any situation gym, networking, event, dinners, coffees, retreats, walks, anytime in public. And if you're not around people in public, like go to events and retreats, like go get coffees, go have dinner by yourself, go get lunch by yourself you will meet people. Go work at a cafe by yourself, whatever it is.
Speaker 1:And if you approach anyone and it feels awkward as well, so just as a highlight, because most people go fuck if I go approach myself and I say something and it's awkward, what do I do? Say this sorry to disturb you, you seem interesting. So I wanted to insert myself in this conversation. Or I wanted to say hey, I can see it wasn't the right time, though I'll let you get back to it, catch you later. You know what I mean. That's all you need to say. Sorry to disturb you, you seem interesting. This conversation seems interesting. I wanted to jump in, but it wasn't the right time, so sorry, catch you later. Everyone will respect that apology big time, because you might enter a conversation where people are talking about one of someone's dad just died and you come into the conversation wanting to talk about business and they're like you're like, oh sorry guys, you guys seem really interesting and whatever that I came at the wrong time, super sorry, I'll catch you guys later. You know what I mean. You guys seem really interesting. I wanted to get around you, but all good, I'll go. Thank you so much. They'll probably come up afterwards and appreciate you for for giving them space and even like.
Speaker 1:So I really go out of my way to meet people around this. Like Simon Beard, I want to get him on my podcast so bad. So if you see this comment on his post and just say, get on a Corey's podcast but I've walked up to him in public and he owns Coach King sold Coach King $600 million favorite entrepreneur of mine because he believes in emotional intelligence, so I'm a fan of that. So I saw a meeting at a cafe. I went to Woolworths, I purchased a card and I wrote in the card of just like asking for some mentorship or him to come onto a podcast in some way, shape or form. I'd love to pick his brain for like 20 minutes, right, like what he could say would blow everything that I'm doing up like a million miles now. So I went up to him and just gave it to him and said I don't want to disturb your breakfast that you're having with Tani, your lovely wife. So have this card, please, read it, let me know. He gave me a follow back and messaged me, messaged me a couple of times on the DMS and I was like, oh, getting excited. So I'm like well for me, I need to be able to inspire Simon. So watch out, buddy, I'm going to start smashing social media. So he can't ignore me. And he's going to be like Corey, let's do a podcast. Yeah, boy, right. So long-term investment.
Speaker 1:So I do things like that. I also like, for example, I went out last weekend to a breakfast with a really two weekends ago, really successful group of men. One of my friends introduced me like come with me, it's just a breakfast, but everyone on there owns Lamborghinis one to 20 Lamborghinis each, something crazy. Like that, right, best people I've ever met like so nice, so kind, so genuine, so authentic, great people. And I paid for lunch. I went up cause I didn't get a chance to like introduce myself to everyone, cause I got into conversation straight away, cause it's great conversations. The bill came to me at the end and I just went fuck it, I'm going to pay this whole thing. And then everyone at the end was like dude, thank you, you didn't have to do that into a group of amazing people and, authentically, the bill just come to me, I don't know why. So I was like I'll put this position, so I'm going to pay for this one, and I'm like cool, that's like a piece of respect that you can get from other people of just a kind gesture, especially when people who can pay the most is seen as the big dog and I'm the littlest dog on the table. So that's like a really awesome way of being able to get in. So just doing things like that is really important.
Speaker 1:And then you can ask questions like this. So copy these questions when you're meeting people what's your name? Best question hey, what's your name? You know what I mean? I'm this. It's a pleasure to meet you, right, I see, if you see people around all the time let's say, at breakfast, gym, whatever it is you say things like this why are you so consistent? You know what I mean your consistency. Are you training for anything? You know whatever? Or like hey, you're here consistently all the time. I see you working hard, man. Another one is what do you do? That's cool. Ask them what they do. They'll tell you that's cool.
Speaker 1:What inspired you to do it? Straight to something deep, because you want to know if that can be inspiring and if you can of relatability, like, oh, what's something that you've had to overcome? That's been really challenging. They go yep, talk about this. I say, man, you show up every day. What's the secret? I like those. It's fun, like meeting bros or like bro.
Speaker 1:You have a strong energy or presence. I respect that. What's the secret? I say that to people. I mean, like man, your energy is wild, you big energy. You got a real strong presence. Man Like, how'd you get it? And I go oh, we can, and I tell me about it. I'm like sweet, I can relate to you because I got something similar.
Speaker 1:What are you learning at the moment? Great question. I don't really want to hang out with people who aren't learning and studying. There we go. What motivates you? You find their drive. They'll ask you what motivates you. They understand. If you can both inspire each other, you got a friendship. Do you invest in yourself? Do you invest in mentors, right? I don't want to hang out with people that aren't investing in mentors. Right? Investing in mentors makes people grow so quickly, right? You seem like you work hard as hell, man. What's driving you? A couple of questions like that you can use Women. It's a little bit different. You compliment each other, like your earrings, like your really nice energy. I like the way you do this. Like you seem like so nice, like you have a great energy, thank you. Like that's how women little compliments like that on like physical appearance and personality. That is a good way to start friendships with women.
Speaker 1:Number four start a podcast. Man man with a podcast, you can just ask people to come on and they will, because everyone wants to get on a podcast, because you share your message with the audience. It's free coaching for you and you get to meet amazing people. I've met amazing people from all around the world and have made insane, inspiring friendships from just starting podcasts. I mean, I've done a podcast and I go get lunch, go get dinner, made friendships. I've met people around the world that I can contact and be like hey, can you connect me with this, this, this, like in America and England. It's crazy the people that have connected and they'll always remember you because they did a podcast, which is really cool. So just start one just for you and just share amazing insights, right. Just see how it goes If you cashed up. Just make the studio awesome, go hire out a studio and just go meet amazing people that you'd like to be friends with and have good chats with them. And then, if you do hang out with them after you know what I mean. Such a good way to make friendships right, and it takes a few hours a week, especially if you haven't got any friends either. That's like the best way.
Speaker 1:Number five tool is increase your own value. This is working on yourself. I don't want to be around people who aren't inspiring. I want to be around people who can lift me up. So achieve what other men want Get a six pack. Everyone respects that man. Get a six pack, get jacked immediately. That just demands respect. I want to hang around you because, holy shit, you're jacked and if I hang around you, I'll get jacked. It's true, whoever hangs around me gets jacked as hell.
Speaker 1:If you make money, get a sick car. Men go nuts and bonding over cars. Get a sick car or buy a hacking gear. So if you go to ice bath, sauna, red light therapy, all that shit, men are broing out over sups. Buy hacking gear or a car or some sort of technology. Men vibe hard over that.
Speaker 1:You see, like one of the things I really want to get is I'm like not really motivated by like lambros and ferraris for the sake of them being lambros and ferraris, but I want one to get to the lambo club or the ferrari club. There is like a club of members when you buy a new one that you get access to all the crazy entrepreneurs and it's done through the cars. And I'm like, wow, I didn't know that until it was like a few months ago. And I'm like, well, I want one really bad. So I'm like, what can I do to work my hardest to go in here and network and meet these people? Right, because I can. That's going to be like the biggest thing to ever. Not many people have.
Speaker 1:That demands respect. Run around Australia, swim around England. You know what I mean. Run 10 marathons, you know 10 days in a row. It's win a higher ups competition, compete in CrossFit, do a bodybuilding comp, anything like that. That is a crazy physical challenge that you choose. Pogo, stick from Melbourne to Sydney. You know what I mean, like it doesn't matter what it is, but you enter anything that is physically really challenging and you compete in there. You demand respect from people and you meet amazing people straight away. They go, oh, I want to be around you. That's super motivating.
Speaker 1:Enhance your confidence and charisma through communication and body language so that you get attention from women. One thing it was really cool was you know what it comes around to how you dress. If you've got a rolly cartier bracelet, you got an awesome silk shirt on, you got some dope sunnies, like you're going to get attention from women. Right, it's going to happen because I go, wow, he dresses nice, he takes care of himself. But you also get attention from women with your body language and your charisma and your confidence. And if you walk into any room and with your confidence and charisma, you can gain the attention from people. Hold eye contact, hold intimacy and people go, wow, that guy is super valuable and he can make jokes, he can lead and he can tell stories. You know that's going to gain attention from the opposite sex, regardless you know opposite sex or the same sex, depending like what sexuality orientation you like to go with, you get attention. That's power. People go fuck. I want to be around that guy because he is not scared to talk to people of the opposite sex and like people want to be around him. If he gets the girls and he does this thing and has the attention, I want to get around him. It's the sort of same thing. It doesn't matter if you're in a relationship or not. So if you can be in a relationship and you can still be the guy that has the conversation that the girls ask the questions to, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 1:And I created that in myself, for example, by learning a lot about relationships. I read, I don't know, almost like every single relationship book out there. I read an absolute shit ton, like all the best ones, and I studied them. So when I'm talking at a table and the conversation of relationships comes up, I've got a lot to say, a lot of stories to tell and a lot of lessons that help people realize things about themselves. So if I'm at a table and it's like me and two guys and there's like five girls, they're all going to be listening to me other than like my friends because of what I've learned about relationships and they can create these awesome stories. Because people like talking about relationships, especially the opposite sex great conversations to have. They start asking me questions. I'm going to look like someone who has more value. So people are going to be like, well, I'm going to be around Corey because he's told all this crazy stuff around these girls. They're very interested in what he's got to say and if I'm around him I'll get to meet people of opposite sex and I might find a partner. You know what I mean. So so, being able to communicate like that and learn that is extremely valuable skill. It's increasing your value, gain status in your niche.
Speaker 1:All, all men respect someone who can mentor. So, whatever niche you're in, if you're an automotive mechanic and you talk about that on social media and you promote yourself and you talk about it as an authority, people are going to be around. People are going to want to be around you because they're like, wow, this person's like a mentor figure. There they are. They've got knowledge in this one area and they're a master of it. So I want to be around this person because they have this mentor energy that I want to have. Right, you get a teacher type of energy that you learn from teaching that only you can have from teaching and mentoring other people. It changes how you talk Like. You can demand respect, you can ask questions. You can, you know, get attention from people just from being able to communicate. As a teacher. You have this different aura about you of certainty that people respect. Learn martial arts.
Speaker 1:Most men respect a guy who can fight and protect, be an excellent partner. 99.9% of men struggle as hell to be a good partner, right, they see, if people see you're in a great relationship, they will open up to you like never before and they will respect you like never before. There's all moments in our lives when we start going. We, you know, we get into the, the lull of the relationship somewhere, somewhere where we go oh shit, we are in it right now. We're doubting we can be together. I'm struggling in the relationship. That's always going to happen in relationships.
Speaker 1:So if you're a great partner and you do things for your partner, you show up for them. You also have got strong boundaries. You're not a yes man, but you can do things for them. Everyone's going to be like man. How do you do it? Help me, because I'm struggling here in my relationship and here, here, here, you can. You can provide a lot of value. Own yourself right. Another tool here is own yourself. Play big with your success and your wins, with your energy. It doesn't necessarily mean you have to put it all over social media, so I recommend that you just be authentic on social media, but playing big with your wins and your energy. Other men who play big will want to get around you so they can feel more of themselves. Tool poppy syndrome is real right, and a lot of people are afraid to share their success and share their wins and their celebrations. But if you're confident to put it out there, other people are going to be like, wow, I want to be around him. Check that out. Sorry, guys, someone just called me no good, right.
Speaker 1:Number six, six practical tool is community events, retreats and online communities. Our brains don't know the difference between online interactions and in-person interactions, so dedicating a couple of hours a week to learning and growing with other men is so powerful. You get into a community that gatekeeps its members and as soon as you come in, you get respect. You do the work in the community, you show up. Men will seek you Everyone, because I've invested in like heaps of communities, programs, stuff before and anyone who's been in the community and is smashing it in there commenting to everyone doing all the tasks, the challenges, talking, promoting, like jumping in everyone in the community is like, wow, I want to be around that guy. There's a lot of people in marketing channels that talk about join a program. Be the guy like crush it better than everyone else. Help everyone, help the coaches, help the team learn everything and then help everyone else. Be 10 steps ahead and you will gain your own audience immediately of people who want to invest in you. It's insane. So joining online communities fantastic. You immediately get respect just for being there and you get to meet people you don't like. Realize that just been able to call people consistently and build relationships with them online. We've connected in Set the Standard community so many people together, friendships and communities and catch-ups, just because they've been in Set the Standard. There's this respect that they have and camaraderie and they always help each other out all around Australia. It's nuts Going to retreats.
Speaker 1:Just by being at retreats, events or workshops, just by being there, you gain respect. People want to talk to you, people want to say hi to you, people want to, like you know, are inquisitive about you just because you are there, right, and they respect you. Fuck, yeah, man, you're here. This is great. You know what I mean. We're in this together, right?
Speaker 1:Because what happens is in retreats or workshops and that you're usually doing challenges with people, which builds camaraderie immediately, which is exactly what you want, which is where people want. It's like, wow, I'm around all these other inspiring people. They're inspiring just because they're here and, like I have people who have joined my retreats, who are now creating business together, making like money Insane. They've met each other. They're creating business relationships. People have gotten married after our retreats. People have done all these different things which are super inspiring for other people and people and they go man, I'm so happy to be around this guy and connect to this person, xyz, which is really cool. It's insane. So now you have everything you need to get to the next level and I have retreats, an online community of absolute studs who hold each other accountable to grow in success and show up setting the standards for themselves and for others.
Speaker 1:And if you want to get around what we're doing, come and join us. Click the link in my bio, send me a DM or follow this podcast and have a look about. You know, have a look around what we've got to offer and whatever calls to you, jump onto that, studs only. But if not, now you've got the tools right Now you've got the tools. Go out and use these. You know, be a host, ask questions, upgrade your digital profile, start a podcast, increase your value and go to community networks and retreats they're all over the place. Find the niche that you like, jump on board, do the thing. But obviously we've got to set the standard. Which is the best place for men. Come and join us and you will grow. You'll meet inspiring people and you will feel inspired and your cup will be filled up. Big love everyone. See you in the next one. Please follow for more podcasts.