Transcript of: 

MY PARALLEL LIFE 

SEASON 1, EPISODE 2 

Daniel Gets a Nobel Prize for Boring Journalism 

By Jasmine Brown and Vera Greentea 

THEME MUSIC: PATAGONIA NIGHTS BY ABIRD 

PHONE CLICKS ON 

DANIEL: Okay, Lo, listen to this. 

RECORDER CLICKS ON 

ELEANOR: (DISTANT) Danny boy, are you already back from school? I spent all morning baking for Abby’s care package, wanna lick the bowl? Remember, you can only have two cookies when they come out, the rest are for her. 

DANIEL: What… Mom? Are you in the wareho-- 

AN IPHONE RINGING 

...he-hello? 

ELEANOR: Hey Danny boy, I just landed in Quito last night. Did you get my text? I don’t know if they’re going through. I was hoping you were going to... well, anyway. I’m just so happy to hear your voice. Looks like-- 

DANIEL: ...Mom, huh? You’re - you’re in Quito already? 

ELEANOR: Yes, it’s me, hon. Is the sound bad? They aren’t really wired up for great cell service in Ecuador, so it’s gonna be a bit rough for a while, but we’ll do the best with what we have-- 

SOUNDS OF THE CALL DROPPING

DANIEL: Mom????? 

ELEANOR: (DISTANT) Hey, there, Danny Boy! What are you still doing out there? I can barely hear you. You know I only have a few hours until my shift. 

SOUND OF DOOR BEING SHUT 

RECORDER CLICKS OFF 

DANIEL: Well? 

LOLA: Did you… edit that to have two versions of your mom… side-by-side? Are -are you sending it to her? I mean, it sounds decent, but like… why? 

DANIEL: No, no. Lola, it was real. Right after I got off the phone with you. I’ve been listening to this all weekend. I wanted to ask my dad but… it’s my mom, you know? But she was in there, but she was also in Ecuador. At least I think she was… no, she must be. She sent me a picture. And Abby hasn’t been able to-- 

LOLA: Well, I’m glad I’m so high on the list 

DANIEL: Lo, come on. This is serious. Are you taking this in? Something really weird is going on. My MOM was behind that door! 

LOLA: Look, I know you really miss her. 

DANIEL: This isn’t that! Lola, it happened. I saw it. I heard it. YOU HEARD IT! 

LOLA: I don’t know what I heard. And honestly, it’s really feeling like you’re trying to freak me out and you know I hate that kind of thing. First you totally abandoned me the other day. Just hung up. No text or anything for four days and now this. I don’t like to be messed with. 

DANIEL: I’m NOT! Okay, look. I’m sorry. I know it’s early for this kind of thing. 

LOLA: It’s 6:30 AM. So yes. It’s just a little early for an emergency call about nonsense.

DANIEL: I was freaked. I didn’t know what to do all weekend. I couldn’t text. But you have to believe me. You always believe me. 

LOLA: That’s not… look. We both have school soon. I really don’t know if you’re proving something or you’re hearing things but… let’s just… reset. Okay? We can facetime this weekend. Then if something spooky happens, I’ll see it too. 

DANIEL: This isn’t a… fine. Whatever. I know it sounds… crazy. I’ll just have to do a more thorough investigation. Then you’ll have to believe me. 

LOLA: Daniel… 

DANIEL: Gotta go. School. 

PHONE HANGING UP 

RECORDER CLICKS ON 

SOUNDS OF KIDS IN HALLWAY 

DANIEL: Why does Easton feel like the days are so much longer than at Paulson? I mean obviously it’s the same but… god. Anyway, it’s over and I’m about to head out to the door. Which hopefully still exists. Or ever existed. Oh, yeah, for posterity it’s Monday-- 

MR. GORDON: Good news, Daniel! 

DANIEL: Huh? 

MR. GORDON: The newspaper! I don’t know if it’s your record from Paulson or the fact that we actually got another student interested but believe it or not, Principal Lang actually changed her tune. Now, I don’t want you to get too excited. It’s only a trial run and we probably don’t have the type of facilities you’re used to, but I’ve secured the computer lab for your crew for an hour after school every day for the next month. That works out to 2:45 to 3:45. Every day, Daniel! What do you think about that? 

DANIEL: Oh. That’s great, Mr. Gordon! Uh, right now?

MR. GORDON: Yes, can you believe it? You can start right away. Now Principal Lang does expect the first newspaper issue out this month, so let’s say three articles by Friday? I’ll be right down the hall if you need any help, of course. Oh, uh, let me show you the lab! Please, after you. 

SOUND OF DOOR OPENING. 

MR. GORDON: Ah, and the other student is already here. Daniel Jones meet Jorge Perrera. DANIEL: Oh! Um, we’ve met? 

JORGE: Yo. 

MR. GORDON: Great! Well, I’ll leave you to it. 

SOUND OF DOOR CLOSING 

DANIEL: Well. Uh. Jorge. Sorry, I...I didn’t know I would be doing this today and I definitely didn’t know that this was your kind of thing. I mean, not that it’s not cool that you’re here. It’s- it’s really cool. I just... uhhh... 

JORGE: (BURPS) 

DANIEL: ...right. Well, OK. Here we are. The Easton High School Paper. Great to have you aboard. Um, so, do you have any ideas to pitch? Like articles you wanted to work on? 

JORGE: Nah. You can lead, man. 

DANIEL: Perfect. Uh. So, actually, I had something I was looking into 

SOUND OF DOOR OPENING 

KATIE: Jorge, this is a new low for confusing texts. How, how, how did you expect me to know where or what the computer lab was? 

DANIEL: Katie! Hi! You’re joining the- my - you’re joining the paper too?

KATIE: The what? 

DANIEL: Nevermind. 

KATIE: OH! The newspaper thing! That’s what you’re doing here, Jorge? That’s adorable! Um, but no, I’m… not doing that. Um, I was actually trying to see if you had your copy of that book? The Tale of the City? My cat barfed on it last week and I just realized that I’m gonna be in trouble without it. 

JORGE: Nah, I don’t have that. 

DANIEL: They… they gave them out. 

JORGE: Yeah. (LAUGHS) 

DANIEL: Oh, um, I mean, I can’t give it to you to hand back in but if you need it for your homework, you can borrow my own copy. I’ve read it already. 

KATIE: Seriously? That would be so awesome, Danny! Thank you! I’m like, three weeks behind, I think. But… I wouldn’t feel right taking it home. My cat has a recurring digestive issue. Do you mind if I like just hang out while you do this… paper thing and catch up? I won’t be loud or anything. I can bring chips tomorrow! 

DANIEL: Oh, yeah. Sure. That’s...yeah, that’s fine. 

DANIEL TAKES HIS BOOK OUT 

DANIEL: Here. 

KATIE: Whoa, this is your copy? I thought you said you read it? This is like Barnes and Noble crisp. Dude, are you one of those obsessives who like irons their underwear? 

DANIEL: Katie, we… we actually have limited time so, if you don’t mind 

KATIE SCRAMBLES TO GET COMFY

KATIE: Right, right. QUIET. 

DANIEL: Anyway, um, like I was saying. There’s this graffiti, I guess, I was looking into-- 

SOUND OF DOOR OPENING 

PORTER: Um, what the fuck? 

JORGE: (HAPPILY) Porter. Yo. 

DANIEL: Hey. Um, are you looking to join the-- 

PORTER: No, no shut up. Guys, you know I have to be home by five, so if you want to hang... 

DANIEL: Um. This is an official school endorsed activity. And, and Jorge and I are working so-- 

KATIE: Just chill with me for a few minutes, Porter. We can leave together. 

PORTER: UGH. Fine. 

SOUND OF PORTER SITTING VERY LOUDLY AND ANGRILY 

PORTER: You know homework is supposed to be done at home, right Katie? 

KATIE: You wouldn’t know, dumbass. 

VIDEO GAME NOISES, CONTINUOUS 

PORTER: (CHUCKLES) Takes one to know one. 

DANIEL: ANYWAY. If no one else is joining us to… not join us. I was saying, there is a lot of graffiti in the area and um, some of the art is pretty interesting. Like, you know the door on Oxen and 15th?

JORGE: No. 

DANIEL: Yeah, well. There’s a door. Or a painting of a door. You can’t miss it. And it’s... it might not really be graffiti but we should start there. I haven’t been able to find any pictures online but there was a mention of door art in Portugal. Apparently it’s a popular type of graffiti there at the moment. But, not much to go on - 

SHUFFLING IN THE BACK OF THE CLASSROOM 

VIDEO GAME NOISES PAUSE 

PORTER: Isn’t a school newspaper supposed to cover, I don’t know… school? I mean, why are you even talking about Portugal? 

VIDEO GAME NOISES RESUME 

DANIEL: I am not talking about Portugal. I’m talking about investigating graffiti in Easton. Maybe we have some artists in the school that do graffiti? We can interview-- 

PORTER: Maybe you’ll get the Nobel Prize for boring journalism. Breaking news, teenagers are tagging. 

KATIE: SHHHH, Porter. We’re supposed to be quiet. 

JORGE: Hey, uh, the computer’s dead. And like. I think they’re all dead. 

DANIEL: Awesome. 

PORTER: It’s not dead, Jorge. Let me look. 

VIDEO GAME NOISES END 

KATIE: Porter is very good with computers. 

PORTER: Katie…

KATIE: THE BOOK IS SO BORING! 

DESKS AND WIRES BEING MOVED 

DANIEL: It gets better. There’s… there’s the revolution and, um, these two guys are in love with the same girl and there’s a beheading-- 

KATIE: No spoilers! 

PORTER: It’s on. The computers are on. The-the wiring was just janky. 

DANIEL: Thanks. 

PORTER: Whatever. 

DANIEL: Um. So. Obviously we need more ideas, so why don’t we spend the rest of this hour just on brainstorming and research and we can plan more specifically tomorrow. Is that good for you, Jorge? 

JORGE: Yup. 

PORTER: Hey, NSA, do you wanna turn off your...? 

DANIEL: Oh, right 

RECORDER CLICKS OFF 

RECORDER CLICKS ON 

DANIEL: Okay, so I’m in front of this door and it’s definitely not art. It’s a real door with like, real hinges. 

SOUND OF DOOR MOVING ON RUSTY HINGES 

DANIEL: It’s… oh, oh yeah, maybe I should say the date or something. Uh, according to my phone, it’s Monday, October 16th, 2019, and shit I have a paper due tomorrow— no, focus.

PATAGONIA NIGHTS PLAYS, CONTINUOUS 

DANIEL: I’m back in front of this spooky door. I checked the other side of this building, and it’s just a warehouse with a garage door, with a foreclosed sign in front of it. It’s all covered in tons of spray paint, but over here on this side… there’s art all around the door but not on it. It still looks like some Twilight shit— okay. Weather- weather is sunny but sort of cold at the same time and there’s some sun like spotlighting this door, kind of like inviting me in. I mean, I know that’s stupid, but it’s sort of picturesque in a Goosebumps sort of way, anyway Abby would say this is how horror movies start and also the black kid dies first, but whatever, this is real life, right? I’m not living the prologue of my own life? I’m just going to push this— 

SOUND OF CREAKING AS A DOOR OPENS. 

PATAGONIA NIGHTS ENDS 

DANIEL: And yes, it still opens like it’s a normal ordinary kind of door. I guess I’m going inside this warehouse. 

WHISPERING IN BACKGROUND, UNINTELLIGIBLE, CONTINUOUS 

DANIEL: One foot in and turning on the flashlight on my phone— ew, I-I can say it does have a strong smell in here. Maybe it’s not an abandoned warehouse after all? It smells kind of like that weird deodorant that’s supposed to make you smell like a man who works out while smoking a cigar, but then instead it makes you smell like a moose’s armpit? Do mooses have armpits? Okay, more steps in... 

SOUNDS OF CRUNCHING ON THE FLOOR 

DANIEL: Flashlight confirms that this is definitely a passageway and I feel like I’m stepping on a million candy wrappers. Seems that there’s no way to go but straight. Yuck, oh god, I just walked into a spider web, ugghh it’s on me, it’s on me!! Oh, I am going to need a serious shower after this. Shit, there’s a light up ahead.

STARTS TO WHISPER INTO HIS RECORDER 

DANIEL: Um, I just realized that I’m probably trespassing. I guess reporters do this all the time, but if they call the cops, I can’t be like, well I heard my mom inside your warehouse and I needed to make sure she wasn’t kidnapped by some sort of warehouse burglars so actually I should be the one to call the cops? Or better yet, hey I’m writing a piece on trespassing and I needed real life experience—yeah. Like they’re going to buy that. 

SOUND OF SMALL SOLID THUMP 

DANIEL: Argh, shhhh, foot meets wall, and now I’ve shushed myself so that’s me being normal. 

SOUND OF ANOTHER DOOR CREAK – THIS ONE AS IF BELONGING TO A MUCH SMALLER, MORE MODERN DOOR 

WHISPERING BACKGROUND ENDS 

DANIEL: And I’m out of that creepy corridor— uh, what the hell? 

PATAGONIA NIGHTS PLAYS, CONTINUOUS 

DANIEL: Um, I’m in my room. (HEAVY BREATHING) Like, my old room in my old house in Cha-- 

ELEANOR: Danny boy! What are you doing peering out of your closet like you’re haunting your own room? Get out here and start on your homework, mister! Here, I brought you some plums as a healthy snack. 

DANIEL: Mom? 

ELEANOR: Yeah, hon. C-come on, get started. There you go. Is Lola coming over for that project later? 

PATAGONIA NIGHTS FADES

DANIEL: Lola? Coming here? To this house? We still own this house? 

ELEANOR: Did you hit your head inside the closet or something? Of course we still own the house. Why wouldn’t we? 

DANIEL: But wha-what about Ecuador? 

A PERSISTENT BEEPING, CONTINUOUS 

ELEANOR: Ecuad- Danny. I’m going downstairs to take out the cherry pie which is for later, and then I have to go back to the hospital. Dad won’t be home until after midnight, so you and Lo are on your own. Pizza is fine, Chinese food is better but only if you order some actual veggies. Got that? And send that girl home after 10, I know you both have a presentation tomorrow. 

THE DOOR CLICKS 

FOOTSTEPS FADE 

BEEPING FADES 

DANIEL: What the…? What’s… going on? Like I said, I’m in my old room and my stuff... it’s like I never moved. And my mom is here. You can clearly hear that in this recording. The sound quality should be different than if she was calling. So, what does that mean for this door? Is this some kind of trick? It’s not my birthday... 

DOOR OPENS 

LOLA: Danny! Guess who just burned her tongue on the best cherry pie ever?! 

DANIEL: Lo? 

LOLA: Correct! Sorry I’m so early! Well, sorry not sorry because oh my god oh GOD your mom makes the most unbelievable pie in the universe. Seriously, if she wasn’t chief of staff of a hospital or something, I’d say she should open a bakery. Actually, the hospital seems kinda trivial in comparison to that freakin’ pie. Forget sick people, heal them with cherry sauce! I can’t believe she’s making me wait half an hour before I can have a slice! 

DANIEL: Um, Lo? Isn’t it weird that we’re here? In my room? 

LOLA: What? 

DANIEL: This morning we were talking about this weird art on a warehouse I found and now I’m in my room, in my house, like nothing ever happened-- 

LOLA: I have no idea what you’re talking about but can we like, table it? We have like 14 hours of work to cram into 4 hours, so how about you tell me after we’re done? Check out these color-coded notes, yo, do I come through, or do I really come through? 

DANIEL: Wait. why am I yellow? You know I hate yellow! 

LOLA: Yellow highlighters are the cheapest ones, and your part is really substantial! Yellow is all that trust I put on your ass, you know? 

DANIEL: Okay-- 

A SMALL THIN BEEP 

DANIEL: Oh shit, my recorder is running out of battery. I need to turn it off. 

LOLA: Recorder? Um, okay, weirdo, what-- 

RECORDER CLICKS OFF 

RECORDER CLICKS ON 

A SMALL THIN BEEP AGAIN 

DANIEL: Damn, still dying. I thought maybe if I took the batteries out and blew on them or something... 

LOLA: (YAWNING) Danny, the movie isn’t finished yet.

DANIEL: You’ve been napping for the past hour. I’m trying to find batteries for this thing. Where do you even buy batteries? 7-11? I don’t think I’ve ever owned anything that I couldn’t plug in the wall. 

LOLA: That thing is so old school. Why do you even have it? 

DANIEL: Abby gave it to me. For the newspaper. She thought it might inspire me in my new school. 

LOLA: New… what? You mean new grade? You’ve had this since September? What’s with you today? 

SOUND OF DOOR UNLOCKING 

DANIEL: Oh, shit. It’s Dad- Hi, Dad. 

LOLA: Mr. Jones! Tyrone! Hey! Our project took longer than we thought! Anyways, here are my shoes, and there is my looseleaf notebook, and oh, you guys can keep the highlighters, I’m outta here. Bye, Mr. Jones. Sorry for eating all the pie! 

SOUND OF DOOR CLOSING 

TYRONE: Pie? What pie? Er, bye Lola.That girl can move. Now, son, why are you still gaping at me? You should bounce like your smart buddy and I’ll pretend to your mother that I never saw you watching a movie at midnight on a school night. 

RECORDER CLICKS OFF 

RECORDER CLICKS ON 

FOOTSTEPS UPSTAIRS 

MORE PERSISTENT BEEPING 

DANIEL: That doesn’t sound good. Am I going to lose everything I recorded if I don’t find batteries in time? All this weird shit I found… it’s the only proof I have that there’s something going on, and I have a way back into a parallel life. I just can’t lose it before I even figure out what to do with it, right? Maybe if I run back to my home at er, my shitty life, I can grab some batteries. Then I can come back here and never have to see that ugly dumb city ever again. 

SOUND OF CLOSET DOOR OPENING 

DANIEL: Will this weird Narnia shit work this time? There are my clothes and… holy shit, yeah, I’m in the tunnel. 

CREAKING 

BACKGROUND WHISPERING RESUMES 

DANIEL: Ugh, why does it have to smell like someone burped after drinking a Pepsi in here? Just… maybe I should bring an air freshener on the way back. 

CRUNCHING FOOTSTEPS RESUME 

DANIEL: God, once you get used to the silence, it’s not silent at all. Like a bunch of people are in here talking loudly at me, but I can’t hear them. But it feels crowded all the same time. I wonder how many people went through this tunnel? I guess zero, or I would have seen, like, random people burst into my room before? And I’d remember if that happened even one time. So, am I the only person that knows about this tunnel between some random warehouse and my room? Maybe, just in case, I should get a lock for my closet door... 

SOUND OF LARGE HINGES CREAKING 

CRUNCHING AND WHISPERING FADE 

DANIEL: Okay, shit, I forgot the buses don’t really run this route this late. I am going to have to walk to the main-- and that homeless person is pissing on my warehouse. Awesome. Maybe I should turn it off to save-- 

RECORDER CLICKS OFF

RECORDER CLICKS ON 

SOUND OF SIRENS 

DANIEL: Um, I’m by my apartment building and there’s this huge crowd like there’s been an accident. It looks like there’s a cop...do they know about the...no, no, they couldn’t know about the trespassing. It has to be something else. right? Are they gonna even let me through? What is even happening? 

DANIEL: Wait, is that my-Hey! Dad! Dad? 

TYRONE: What the-- Daniel? DANIEL! Oh for fuck’s sake, where have you been? We’ve been looking for you for hours! Your mom is trying to find a flight home, oh god, I have to call her. 

DIALING 

TYRONE: Thank you, Officer Capote, this is him! I am so, so sorry that I-. Hello, shit it’s voicemail. Hey, it’s me, Eleanor, we found him. The little idiot just comfortably strolled home like he doesn’t even know he’s about to be grounded until he’s an old man. 

OFFICER CAPOTE: Sir, this is exactly-- 

TYRONE: I know, Officer, I understand. We wasted your time. I’m just trying to reach my wife before she gets on a plane and then my son and I are going to have a serious talk-- 

DANIEL: Shit-- 

RECORDER CLICKS OFF 

MAIN THEME/PATAGONIA NIGHTS PLAYS 

TIM: My Parallel Life is written and produced by Vera Greentea and Jasmine Brown. The audio for this podcast is recorded and mixed by Mike Umile. Music is created and performed by aBIRD. My Parallel Life stars LC Witter, Julian Thomas, Shiree Nicholas Christopher, Steph Marie Alvarez, Louis Walker, Jayme Face, Timothy Rodriguez, Rajiv Miller, Siera Louis Gene and Jasmine Brown. Website and credits are by Timothy Rodriguez.

To learn more about My Parallel Life and the fantastic crew of people who make it, visit our website: jumpycatstudios.com. If you’d like to help us spread the word, please give us a five star review and tell your friends to subscribe at any major podcast platform. This episode’s a wrap, see you in another dimension!