You can’t change what you don’t notice. Pay attention to the fact that different seasons require different protocols, rhythms and energy
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You can’t change what you don’t notice. Pay attention to the fact that different seasons require different protocols, rhythms and energy
Let's connect.
I am cheering for you!
Welcome to the Live a Vibrant Life podcast. I'm Life Coach Kelly Tibbetts and each week I'll be here to encourage and equip you with the tools you need to grow in self-awareness and invest your best energy in your dreams and your purpose. I believe self-awareness changes everything. Let's get started. Hey friends, welcome back to the Live a Vibrant Life podcast. Today I'm going to be sharing what is session three of the Low and Slow Equals Peaceful Productivity series that I've been talking about here on the podcast. That's the series we are doing in my group coaching program, where every week, we come together and work on aligning our energy. If you could because it's safe to do so close your eyes, put your hand on your heart, take a few breaths. What energy do you notice, what you want to be in as you create results in your life? I have spent the last few years helping women recover the energy that got depleted by overgiving and over-serving, and so many of them say the same thing they want to walk through life with peaceful productivity. The energy they want to be in is that abundant, aligned energy of peace. For some of us, before we've ever really noticed our own energy, we may not even know that that's something we want, but I hope that our time together every week is allowing you to notice what's important to you. What thoughts do you want on repeat? What feelings do you want driving your actions? What things in life do you want to say yes and no to? And if one of the things you're noticing is that you would like peaceful productivity, I think today's little conversation should help you there. So, no matter when you listen to this, I want you to think about the fact that there are different seasons of our life. We often talk about the seasons that are connected to weather winter, spring, summer, fall but in my coaching program, I actually break it up into six seasonal series, because the reality is all of us have different seasons in life where we are busy and moving forward and creating productivity, and then there are other seasons where the best gift we could give present and future versions of ourselves is to allow ourselves a season to recover and to heal and to be at peace. And so, when we think about winter energy, what would you notice if you went for a walk today into the woods?
Speaker 1:I live in New Hampshire. It's wintertime there's actually a little bit of beautiful snow falling today and I would notice that most animals are hibernating, the plants are not growing. It is a time of rest and for most of my life even though I grew up in the church world, I was educated to be a teacher I didn't have anybody in front of me explaining the idea of different seasons of life until I was probably in my 30s. I found Dr Henry Cloud's, boundaries, pete's, gazero's, emotionally Healthy Spirituality. But I remember a pastor friend of mine named Adam, who's also one of the guests on my podcast. I'll link it in the notes below.
Speaker 1:He gave a sermon once about how important it is in life that we both breathe in and breathe out. We can't constantly be bringing information in. That's something I love to do. I love to read and go to different conferences and learn from other leaders. But it wouldn't be healthy for me to learn, learn, learn and then never go and do something. But it's also true that we weren't created to do, do, do, run, pass capacity, live overwhelmed, depleted lives.
Speaker 1:No-transcript. There are important days and months and years when we're supposed to be more of a leaning back and a resting energy, and so that's what I think of when I think of winter energy, of going low and slow, of allowing ourselves that nap or that time in front of a fireplace to sit and read a book. That's been important to you to have a friend over to just sit in silence. So I cannot say that this is something we do a lot, but my husband and I we do go for walks a lot, but today was one of those days where we sat on our porch after because it really was very pretty the snow was just falling in a very, you know, picturesque hallmark movie looking kind of snow. We just sat and looked at it. And meditation is something I never learned until I was way past 45, of the practice of just sitting there and breathing in and holding my breath and then breathing out and regulating my nervous system, and I've gotten better at it over these last few years. I'm someone who just naturally goes fast and frenetically, so doing low and slow work is so important for me and that's why I like sharing it with you. And so sitting on my porch watching the snow fall, allowing myself to be in the winter energy today of not having to be incredibly productive, to not have to go anywhere the roads are slippery and I don't have to drive in them, so what would it look like today to just cut my to-do list in half and decide that it's okay for me to read that book that I'm working on, or to come up here and record a podcast. And what would it look like for you today?
Speaker 1:It doesn't always have to be summer energy in our lives, and I might be the first person saying that to you and so you might feel very uncomfortable. What do I mean by summer energy? If you have been part of any of the programs that I've shared, you know I talk a lot about protocols, and those are deciding in advance the budget for your energy. The same way you decide the budget for your money, or perhaps use a fitness pal tool where you decide the calories that you're going to bring in energy in, energy out. How does a budget work? It helps us to not go way past our limits.
Speaker 1:Energy is so interesting because it's something we don't always notice until we start to pay attention to it. And then, as you begin to pay attention to it, you will probably have a lot of aha moments. Oh, of course, this is why I'm so tired today. I haven't had a lot of recovery, I've just spent a lot of time running and moving and doing. And so winter energy says let's look at nature. What are the animals doing? They're resting more. What are the plants doing? They're hibernating. The ground is, you know, receiving the snow, and it's going to turn it into fertilizer and it's going to allow the plants to grow in the spring. We don't want plants growing in the winter, right, they'll freeze and die.
Speaker 1:What would it look like for you to decide that your winter energy, spring, summer, fall energy, that that's probably different. When I create a protocol in the summer, I often give myself five blocks a day of energy, and each of those blocks gets a priority. Maybe it's focused time for my home, it might be focused time for work, it might be focused time for relationships that are important to me In the spring. In the fall, I limit myself to four blocks a day of different things that get my energy, and in the winter, I try to honor two or three blocks a day, depending on which day of the week it is, and one thing that I highly recommend to everybody is for the holiday season two blocks a day of intentional decisions might be a better gift than trying to fit in five blocks a day, and so, if you want to learn more about that. I have other podcasts where I talk about a protocol.
Speaker 1:But for today, what would it look like if you just planned the week ahead and you said I'm going to give myself three blocks a day of intentional energy something to do in the morning, something I'm doing in the afternoon, something I'm doing in the evening and then after dinner, whatever you decide. Until morning that's a period of rest and because the sun goes down earlier, it might make sense for you to do fewer things in the winter. But what would it look like if you weren't limited to the calendar month or the winter, spring, summer, fall definition of season? What if you looked at your life today? I think of a dear friend who lost her husband recently. She is in a winter season and would be even if it was the month of June. I think of other dear friends who are going through physical hardship of illnesses and they are in a winter season and it would be unkind to expect themselves to be running like it's summer. If I could go back in a time machine to the months and years where I had three little kids under the age of four, I wouldn't have expected myself back then to do as much as I did.
Speaker 1:The hard part is when we get past our limits. Very few of us stay emotionally healthy. When we go past our limits, we often grow frustrated, aggravated, resentful. Is that true of you? I know it's true of me, and so that's why we want to notice. What season am I in today? Is this a spring day? Is it a summer? Is it a fall? Is it a winter? Is it a holiday season? What kind of energy do I have available to me, emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually? And so a lot of people these last few years have been talking about the idea of huga, of this Danish practice of making cozy, comfortable moments in the winter. I know many of my friends who enjoy winter sports, love ice skating and skiing and getting out into the sunshine. It doesn't mean hibernate and stay away. It means noticing the energy you have available and using the correct amount of energy to be the productive person that you want, because our goals really do matter. What's important to you is important, even if there's no urgency.
Speaker 1:In my coaching program we spend a lot of time looking out five or 10 years and saying what's a dream that's inside your soul that's really important to you? It might be relationships with your adult children. It might be a book that you've always wanted to write. It might be creating events so that other people just like you can come and learn from you. I think of several of my friends who did a lot of homeschooling. I would love for them to take all those decades of knowledge and pass it on to somebody else. That's an amazing dream, but in order for us to dream, we have to have the energy to dream.
Speaker 1:We can't constantly be living in the moment by moment frustration of an over busy life. We can't change the things we don't notice. Step one is always get that blank piece of paper. Take out your notes app. Let's just take a minute and notice. Is it a winter season for you, like literally or figuratively? Is it the deep dark? The sun is going down at four o'clock and it's 20 degrees, and it's just harder to do a lot of things than when it's 80 degrees and sunny.
Speaker 1:Now you might live in a place where the weather doesn't fluctuate as much, and so you don't discern your energy as much by the weather as by other things. That's why we want to start with notice. I can't tell you what state you're in today. You're the only one who knows. So notice what kind of energy. But if you are in winter energy, what have we tried on? A few thoughts Like what if it's okay, something's gone wrong, that you are affected by the temperature and the light and the length of day and having to be inside more. If nothing's gone wrong and you were just curious, instead of judging, what would you notice about winter?
Speaker 1:Some of us notice that we like there to be more candle lights and fairy lights and book time, but others might notice you just get kind of sad without any vitamin D, and so you know. We're so lucky that in this day and age we can go to the doctor so we can take vitamin D supplements. So what are you noticing about this current season, if it is actually winter? When you're listening, what are you noticing? And what's the vibe of winter for you? For some of us, winter is the best. It means skiing and snowshoeing and getting to be outside and not having to do a lot of yard work, and for others it feels like I can't go anywhere. It's slippery. Only you know what it means for the vibe of winter in your life when you notice it.
Speaker 1:Then we get to decide. And one of the words. That doesn't serve us is the idea of balance. Balance is trying to make everything even. Okay, I'm going to have five blocks a day of decision focused protocol. Right, I'm going to decide that my first block is six to seven thirty, and then I'll have a second block and a third block, and I'm just going to be balanced all the time.
Speaker 1:And the reality is, different seasons require different protocols. Different seasons require shorter days of energy, longer days of energy, and so what we're really looking for is sort of a rhythm, a leaning in and a leaning out, a doing the work and then resting and pivoting and noticing and deciding. And all of this nuance is why we host coaching programs every week. We can make a decision today and then tomorrow all of the decisions get turned upside down. Somebody you love gets sick and you have to run and go take care of them. A work project gets moved by two weeks. There's always something requiring us to pivot.
Speaker 1:So the best gift we can give ourselves is every single day, sometimes a couple of times a day, noticing the reality of the energy of this day and then making one small decision what's something important to you? That's where you're going to focus your energy, and we're offering that in the winter, the amount of energy you have for that important goal may be less than it is in the summer seasons of your life. And so if you're noticing that winter in particular, like literally January, february, energy is different than the other seasons of the year and you've decided to sort of lean into that huga idea of being super kind to yourself and making those warm beverages and having times to do the knitting or any of the other practices that serve you in the winter and know that a season of spring is coming. There'll be another season where perhaps you're outside walking more and in this season you're settling in a little bit more and doing more weightlifting instead of going for longer runs. That's the beauty of noticing the nuance is, then you can make a decision based on the reality of your energy instead of holding ourselves to an unrealistic expectation, which is something I did for so many decades until I began to work with coaches and learned you know a little bit about myself that I'm in this emotionally heart-centered, present-focused human who gets a lot of energy from inputs. I love podcasts and reading and discerning and equipping and enabling people. That's my natural place of energy. But I have limits, as all of us do, and so if I'm constantly giving out and not resting and recovering and refueling myself, I don't have anything to give from a place of joy and love, and that is a really important thing to me. In addition to having aligned energy of peace, I want to be kind and loving, I want to be enthusiastic and live an abundant life.
Speaker 1:So what do you want for this season right now, whether that season is today, the next week, the next month? What would you like? What's your goal? Can you do the small practice steps in a low and slow manner to create peaceful productivity? Can you pick one less project for this week? Can you stretch out the time between when you begin and when you end? Can you go a little lower and slower? And so I just want to end our time with you noticing your energy and making one small decision for this winter season, noticing what it is that you need today. Do you need more rest? Do you need more community? Do you need more energy invested in you, or are you feeling really aligned and healthy and you're ready to pour back out? Wherever you are on that continuum, I'd love to invite you into my community.
Speaker 1:There's so much evidence that the five people we spend the most time with have a huge impact on our lives. So on Wednesdays we get together, we talk about how to stay in aligned energy, and on Thursdays we take our best energy and focus it on our dream. You can learn more at kellytipuscom or send me a message over on Facebook or Instagram. I'll be back next week to go a little bit deeper in this process of going low and slow to create peaceful productivity, and I hope you have a great week. Music playing. Thank you for joining the Live a Vibrant Life podcast. I hope our time together encouraged you and will equip you with the tools you need to move your life into the vibrant life you desire. I'm here to help you live a brave, creative, purpose-filled life, and if you'd like to learn more, you can follow me on Instagram or Facebook, kelly Tibbetz Life Coach, or visit my website, kellytibbetzcom. I look forward to connecting again soon. Music playing.