Listen in on Kelly’s conversation with Shannon Warner, of the Having a Mom Moment podcast.
Kelly and Shannon are both passionate about supporting mothers and advocating for empowered motherhood. Let’s embrace the chaos of motherhood while still nurturing ourselves, our desires, and our careers.
Put your oxygen mask of self care on first. By centering ourselves and noticing our importance, we become better able to share joy and love to those we love, including our children.
We are better mothers when we focus first on working towards being the best version of ourselves.
Main points:
Links
Let's connect.
I am cheering for you!
Listen in on Kelly’s conversation with Shannon Warner, of the Having a Mom Moment podcast.
Kelly and Shannon are both passionate about supporting mothers and advocating for empowered motherhood. Let’s embrace the chaos of motherhood while still nurturing ourselves, our desires, and our careers.
Put your oxygen mask of self care on first. By centering ourselves and noticing our importance, we become better able to share joy and love to those we love, including our children.
We are better mothers when we focus first on working towards being the best version of ourselves.
Main points:
Links
Let's connect.
I am cheering for you!
Hey friends, I here with my friend Shannon and we are talking about being a mom in May. My kids are grown, but boy do I remember those May months when they were little and it was like a recital after a big school project, after something important at church. It was just like thing after thing and you get so tired. And so part of what I want to be able to do is remind you of the value of Taking those small moments every single day that you need to, stay in that healthy aligned energy. Welcome to the Live a Vibrant Life podcast. I'm life coach Kelly Tibbitts and each week I'll be here to encourage and equip you with the tools you need to grow in self awareness and invest your best energy in your dreams and your purpose. I believe self awareness changes everything. Let's get started. Shannon, thank you for being here today. I'm excited to just talk to you about how we stay in aligned energy. So I'm wondering what you're thinking as you consider May and being a mom. It's so interesting. I was thinking about the same thing and like how to take care of yourself in these busy times. It's just like the final stretch and the kids are so excited. I've only got one in elementary and my other one's a toddler, but I'm It's like we've got this this week and this next week and then this the following weekend and da da da da da da da da da you know Plus their energy is just through the roof because they're excited. So yeah, we're all feeling it. Yeah so we are here today. I was on your podcast. We had so much fun chatting. So we thought, let's just try to encourage moms with some of the tools we've learned. We met through Cathy Heller's program. What I love about her is she's a mom as well. And just calling us to that high energy, that, you know, idea that all of us as our vibrations rise, it's like all the boats and the oceans rise together. So tell people a little bit about you, I'll tell them a little bit about me and then we'll chat. Yeah. Yeah. Great. Real quick, love Cathy, and I know we'll talk about her more in a minute, but like, I've had those moments in her program when it's a bunch of women staring at each other over Zoom, and I'm like, we could change the world. Like, if we just hold on to this, like, we can totally put a ripple effect that will change everything. So, I'm glad you said that. I'm Shannon Warner of Having a Mom Moment and the Having a Mom Moment podcast. I am a mom of two girls, which drives a lot of the work that I do, because I don't want this world to be the same when they're my age. I don't want them to have to go through the things that we're having to go through as women and mothers in 2024. You know, a lot has not changed. Do you think we would have progressed further? And we haven't, especially I'm really passionate about working moms. My heart, my heart. So I'm just a champion for empowered motherhood and I really want moms to embrace the beautiful chaos of motherhood, but also nurture themselves, their desires, their careers, their evolution in the process, because we still matter. So we're here to say, you know what, moms, the more you can center yourself, get your aligned energy, Know how important you are, what's going to truly happen is from that place of joy, you're only going to send out joy and love. I was one of those moms who didn't have anybody around me to say, Kelly, put yourself first. My mom didn't know this and they just wore themselves out. Also, they weren't trying to balance all the balls we're trying to balance. And I think all the balls are important. I'm so thankful for my career. I'm so thankful for the volunteer work I did. And I'm so thankful for being a mom and a friend and all the things. I think all of them matter. And so. Right. We, we were connecting a little bit about the Enneagram and we're just going to just kind of touch on it today because I think self awareness changes everything. If people could understand why they think and feel and do life and then they would be able to just notice is my energy today aligned with where I'd like to be? Yes. Yes. When we listened to Cathy Heller last week, one of the things that spoke to me, she said, choose your thoughts in the morning the way you choose your clothes. And I find it easy to not choose my clothes, just throw anything on. And that's not the best way. Like if I'm going to be on here with you, I'm going to like, do my hair a little, do my makeup a little and pick something that's not like ratty. Right. I can choose that. And my life changed last week. I was having a hard day thinking about some things said, you know what? I want to think. That I want to be a person of gratitude today. That's my intention. And it changed everything about my day to start there and move from there. So what do you think about people growing in self awareness when their mom and life is busy? I feel like it is so necessary, even if before you were a mother, you've done some of this, you know, your world gets rocked, whether you're anticipating it or not once you have a kid. Right. And so stepping into it either for the first time or again, as a mom is so important. And like you've mentioned. There's a ripple effect, and you're going to create positivity and change for your own kids, right? And that's what we want. We want our kids to have the best lives and the best opportunities, and it starts with us. It absolutely starts with us. We have to wake up, and we have to realize As Cathy says, where we're going unconscious, right? What kind of program we're running on autopilot every day. And just take inventory of what patterns you're repeating, what program you're running. It isn't really serving you. And like you said, where you want to go, right? And oftentimes you realize, no, we're not. And that's what I love about the Enneagram. It's almost like someone's giving you a little bit of a manual for you. So you're an Enneagram one. I'm an Enneagram two. There's nine paths, thinking, feeling, doing life. You're basically walking through life saying, what's the right thing to do? And you want to do the right thing for the right reason. That's like driving your motivation. But if you didn't know better, you might think everybody. Is trying to do the right thing for the right reason. Yeah And that might not be driving their behavior And so it would be like hard to understand each other or you could say this is how I do life It's how they do life. I'm going to have grace for them Yes, and i'm going to be aware of when is this healthy and when is this unhealthy? So i'm an enneagram two i'm processing life through my heart. I want to be kind and loving But the most important person to be kind and loving to is me And so if I can do that, I'm not looking for the world to fill my cup when they're exhausted. So what have you noticed, learning a little bit about yourself through the lens of the Enneagram? Anything that helped you as a mom to learn about being an Enneagram one? Yeah, I noticed one. It sounds so silly, but. And you had brought this to my attention when I walk into a room, I immediately noticed what's wrong. And it's not, I'm not trying to be a jerk. I just do. I'm like, Ooh, that's not right. That's not right. That's not right. And it helped me realize that the people in my world and in my house don't see those things. They're not trying to be inconsiderate to me. They literally just don't see it. So one, it gives me the space to give them grace, but also I'm like, okay, but if somebody else walked into here, into the same space, they're not going to see it as cluttered or messy. So like Take a beat. It's okay. I love that because if you can be kind of loving, oh, of course Be any green one and you see the body centered noticing everything, right? It's like ones have this little inner critic and that's constantly speaking and then you think everybody has one you're like, how are you all ignoring? Right? I know I can't tell you how many times i'm like, why is nobody doing the right thing? It's so easy. Why am I the only one doing the right thing and it's like no We're just not all wired that way and that That's okay. That's okay. Yes. And I think when you're a mom and you're self aware this way, you're not expecting your, you know, your kids to be like you, right? It's okay that they think and feel and do life differently. That's huge. And then being on the other side of the spectrum of having these adult children to be able to say, wow, you think, feel, do life differently. Let me learn from you. What do you think about this? It's been really powerful. So yeah, the Enneagram is something I love to talk about, if you go to my, what's it called? Wink and Bio? There's so many things there. I have a podcast, and I've talked about both the, Working Genius and Instagram there. You have a podcast as well? What do you like to talk about on your podcast? I love Have moms on to talk about it's such a wide I can't like put it into one little pretty box tonight I like to talk to moms I love to give them a space to share their stories and their journeys and we don't realize how wise we are You know every single time Some mom drops a little nugget. I'm like, did you just hear yourself? Because that was profound. And they're like, what? I'm like, you know, like we have so much wisdom and it reminds me of, you know, in history, a lot of us are mothering alone, right? Alone, like in our homes. And we don't have our community in our village, which I know is a hot topic. We're always talking about it, but mothers used to be in community more, right? And this wisdom was flowing much more easily. And now we're more isolated, and it's just a beautiful opportunity. I mean, I get something from every single conversation, but I really hope that the audience does as well. So just motherhood journeys, topics that are meaningful to moms, and different ways that women are tapping into their own alignment and stepping into their own power. So hopefully listeners can take a page out of someone else's book and you know, live a more empowered journey. It's my favorite thing to learn from other people, right? So you don't have to learn it yourself. And then so many times listening to a podcast like yours or going to a group like happy Heller, you just feel so affirmed. Oh, it's not just me. Yeah, I'm not the only one having this may experience as a mother. I literally didn't know going into the school years with my kids. What to expect as a mom in may i'd been a teacher Right, but it was very different than three kids who have a thousand things in 30 days. It's just yes Yes former teacher as well. I love how we all end up bumping into each other A lot of us are drawn to this kind of work and space, but I agree, you know I knew how a classroom full of seven to eight year olds were Behaving and how we're all just hanging on for dear life those last few weeks But yes, then that kid comes home with that same energy and all of their activities. Oh, and now there's a toddler in the mix. You know, it's a different world. I hear you. Any thoughts for the moms who might hear this, anything you've learned along the way as a teacher, as a mom, school age, anything coming to mind that you're like, you know what? Here's a way to just take care of yourself and have that mom moment. Yes. And I want to say, too, when I started, I grabbed this handle having a mom moment back in 2017 and my daughter was six months old. So I was like in the thick of learning how to mom and I was back at work and I had like an hour at the end of the summer where I could run outside and my husband was watching the football game. He's like, I will watch the baby go get outside. And it was like one of the first times I had spit out. Like a chunk of time outside all because I was a baby and I was breastfeeding and all the things, you know, and I Remember thinking. Oh, this is it this i'm having a mom moment. I'm sitting in a lawn chair in the back and i'm Like this is all I get but now it's like no these are moments that we grab that can change the trajectory of your entire day, your week, so on and so forth. So for me, it starts with the morning routine, which I try to be as diligent and dedicated to as I can, but I'm human and life happens. And sometimes the snooze button wins, but I try to begin every morning with journaling and meditation and taking that space for myself and allowing whatever comes through to be processed the best that it can and the amount of time that I have. And then it gives me more. Energy and space and bandwidth throughout the day to maneuver through situations and emotions that may be less than the high vibe ideal life that I want. Well that's why I call my program, process, whatever, Living a Vibrant Life. I think it's all the colors. It's not just like the happy moments part of life is having the full experience of it. And so if you're journaling is like, you know what, this is my fifth day in a row of just being really pissed off and I'm going to process it, but it's still kind of in it. I think that's huge. So one of the things that we're just offering is in May, it might be a little bit harder than normal, even if normal is really hard. And so that time it might be in the morning, but it might be, you know what, a few minutes before you go to sleep, but you're worth the five minutes, 10 minutes, 30 minutes. My life literally changed. My girls were in college, right? And I had just been any grim to unhealthy on my energy, going out, getting in lots of codependent relationships as any grandmothers do. And I had joined a gym that I loved and I wasn't getting there enough. And one day the trainer said to me, Kelly, you are worth 30 minutes. And it. For my life. I was like, of course, you know, I want to be strong at 75. I need to show up 30 minutes and get that energy moving. And, yeah. So whether it's in the lawn chair or it's going to the gym or it's just sitting in your bed. On Mother's Day, when my girls were little, I used to sit in my bed and lock the door. I didn't go visit my mom. Yeah. My husband would take my girls to see his mom. I would like watch whatever I wanted. He'd make me dinner. That's the thing too, you're giving yourself permission, but especially if you have girls, you know, this is my, I've got girls, you've got girls, like the example that you're setting for them. Yeah. That it's. safe and okay to take this time intentionally for themselves is huge, huge, right? And hopefully for all the sons to see their moms doing that, right? Like, I don't think that's best either, but sons think somehow their mom's superhuman and the daughters get in on the back end of it. Like, no, it was really hard. Don't do this. Like, you know, I meant to create these corporations together, right? These families that we're creating. I heard somebody say this recently. The dad might go out and work for pay and he's sales of the corporation and the mom's in the back and she's like project managing and she is like, you know, making sure the accounting is done. Like you're building a corporation together and all of the roles are valuable. And some seasons you're leaning out and some seasons he's leaning out, but it is fun to be on this other side and say like, wow, some of these decisions we didn't know would be so important have really helped create these three women who what's the end goal that you go and you fly and you go live your amazing lives and I'm not chasing you. I'm. So in love with my own life that I'm able to just like mother's day, they weren't home. They went and hiked together. The me before life coaching would have been just like, Oh, it's so hard. And I'm like, you know, I'm like the me that is happy, centered, aligned, purpose filled was like, love that for you guys. And love this for me. Here's what I'm doing as well. And you know, that's what I want to be encouraging women is to say like, Every single step is important. I'm so glad we're going to connect and talk to mom specifically. But the healthier you are now, you're just this like shining light for them and for future you. That you're not getting to the end and they're leaving high school and you're like, Who am I? What do I have? You know? So the last thing we were going to talk a little bit about, we did mention her, Cathy Heller. Love her. I didn't find a never after and then we were in the quilt together. She just creates these programs for women to remind us that like, it's just worth it to find those five people that are on the same path as you, speaking that same language as you, encouraging you, spurring you on. I just went to an amazing church service this week where the pastor of an incredibly, Like high functioning great church is stepping down for no reason other than it's time to pass the baton on And he's a boomer and he's giving it to a millennial and he's like this is what we need is younger voices at the table It's just so great. It's like let's end well and pass the baton on and so Last week with Cathy always I get goosebumps with her and the guests she brings on. One of the most important things I learned was choose my thoughts the way I was choosing my clothes. Anything speak to you last week as you were in that space? It was a really well timed thing for me and as a former student, you know, and I still consume her materials and listen to her podcast and everything. I still need the reminders and I can still fall out of it. You know, it is a practice that takes a practice. You've got to be dedicated to it, you know, and it's the whole thing was just a reminder to me because I found myself in a bit of a rut lately and it was just like, no, no, no, no. You're here on purpose for a purpose. You are capable of everything. You deserve it all. You're so worthy and you'll get to choose, you know, and it was like, thank you. It doesn't matter how many times you hear it. Sometimes it's exactly what you need in that moment, just a little kick in the pants to be like, No, no, I get to, I get to choose, and this is what I want. I used to be a pastor between being a teacher and being a life coach, I was a pastor, and Every sermon that I felt like was my point of being put on earth is to say to people you are made on purpose for a purpose. Yeah. And there's so many purposes, right? Sometimes it literally is taking out your phone and texting somebody and saying, Hey, I was just thinking of you today, and this is why I love this about you. Right. Yeah. And so, yeah, I think You know, atomic habit says that different people say it, then five people you spend the most time with influence you in such an incredibly big way. And so I think that's why you have a podcast and I have a podcast, even if we're not sitting with you, we are like getting that input into your brain that you might already know, but you forgot. And let's just remind you again, like put yourself first, put that oxygen mask of self care on first, because mom's what you do is so important. Yeah, and you're so worth it. And you're so worthy. You're so worth it. Yeah. So anything else come up that you thought you wanted to share a little bit? And we'll be back again next week to go a little deeper or just talk a lot. We just want to have conversations about what's going on right now. Hold that space. Absolutely. And hopefully invite some of our mom friends to come along. They can leave us some questions to talk through, but anything else coming to mind, I'll share a little bit after that. But something that's coming up on your podcast or a recent podcast you've enjoyed, tell us a little bit about your podcast and how people can find it. Yeah, absolutely. So it's the Having a Mom Moment podcast and I had Kelly on a few, it was more than a few weeks ago, but a few episodes back now. I'm on a break at the moment, but I'll be back with new episodes in a couple of weeks, but there are 55 episodes Ready for you to dive into now. Again including the one on the enneagram with kelly. So I love it the episodes are about an hour long and I just, I can't, I've tried to make them shorter and I can't because it's like we talk about this and then we go into this and we go into this and it's so fun to see how a woman's motherhood experience so often has dropped her exactly into where she is now. Her life and her career and her passion like it, you know, in today. So that's a lot of fun So that's coming back soon excited to share that. I love it. It's so life giving Um and just having these higher level conversations, you know It's like always gives me a chance to have a conversation with someone like in my five, you know, right? So That's going on, and I recently rolled out a one to one, motherhood momentum member, mentorship specifically for expecting new or working moms. I'm really gearing it towards new moms, but if you're in working motherhood for a couple years and you're like, hey, this is hard, and I want to love my life because I used to, and I love pieces of it, but, you know, it doesn't work. It doesn't feel as cohesive and lovely as I once felt. It's for you. It's a high touch, one month intensive, one on one, totally personalized to you and your circumstances. Let's get in there and let's find where we can find more ease and where we can rebuild your confidence and just help you move through this time where there's not a lot of support with a lot of support. I'm here for that because it was such a pain point for me and I hate that there isn't. More opportunities for women to move through that sector with eaves you survive your delivery you survive your maternity leave You know, it can be struggling a struggle as well So I'm there for that but then you get back to work and you feel like you've got it all back together And then you hit a wall I know you just that you just cannot be prepared for all of the different aspects and all of the things that are coming at you so My machine and, and could have just sat with you at the beginning. And I think the transition from not being at work for a little bit to going back to work now, as this whole new version of you as a mom. Is, is so hard. And, and what I love about life coaching as it's exploding, I think people are seeing, we don't bat an eye that somebody who wants to be better at tennis or somebody wants to be better at golf goes and gets a coach and says, Hey, can you show me how to do this better? And then we take our lives. The most important thing we're doing and then think, Oh, should I put money in time into learning how to do this? Right? Of course we should. Of course we should. My life coaches have changed my life and I love the opportunity that you're offering to people to say, Hey, I'm going to, and I love how Cathy Helder says it. I'm not saying follow me. I'm saying come with me. Yeah, I might be two steps ahead of you. Exactly. I'm a toddler instead of a baby. I'm going to grab you by the hand. I'm going to share this. I'm going to show you what I'm noticing and see if you want to make a decision that could help you really have this vibrant life. And so that's what I do as well. I have a group program so that it is more of an affordable price point, but I do do one on one as well. But I think the most important thing that my group holds space for is is just that every single week. So on Wednesdays, we come, we align our energy. And on Thursdays, we say, what's the dream, that purpose that's so important. Are we putting small steps towards creating that result? Because in life, things that are urgent end up taking our energy at the expense of things that are important, but not urgent. If your dream is I want to write a book, I want to start a podcast. I want to have a monthly meal with friends. If there's no urgency to it, that's always going to drop to the bottom of the to do list. And it's been so fun, you know, over the last four years to see people, Hey, 20 minutes, 30 minutes, an hour a week. You know, you don't have to create a newsletter a day. You can create one a month. But in 12 months, you might have a book. You know, you can start a podcast with hardly any equipment these days and now instead of having to invite 40 people into your home, you can share this and impact those 40 people and they share it with somebody. So yeah, I love that. We're both doing the same thing. We're saying to moms, you matter. We want to hold space come and chat. And so, where could they find you best place to find me is right here on Instagram at having a mom moment. This was so fun, Kelly. I love chatting with you. Thanks for being here. Thank you for joining the Live a Vibrant Life podcast. I hope our time together encouraged you, and will equip you with the tools you need to move into the vibrant life you desire. I'm here to help you live a brave, creative, purpose filled life, and if you'd like to learn more, you can follow me on Instagram or Facebook, Kelly Tibbetts Life Coach, or visit my website, kellytibbetts. com. I look forward to connecting again soon.