From 35 Years in the U.S. Marine Corps to Civilian Life

From the disciplined ranks of the U.S. Marine Corps to the introspective pathways of civilian life, retired Sergeant Major Cortez Brown graces our show with tales of his remarkable transition. 

His story isn't just one of change, but a testament to the power of self-reflection to learn and improve, when transitioning out of the military. Cortez shares his journey, and we're reminded that leaving the uniform behind doesn't mean abandoning the brotherhood forged in service. 

Tune in for a candid look at the struggles, triumphs, and profound personal growth unfolding when a life of orders becomes a self-guided reflection.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome back to unarmor talk podcast. Thank you so much for listening and watching each episode and continue pleased to share with your friends and family members and colleagues, and don't forget to leave a rating or review if you feel this is a awesome show. And you can connect to all of my social media on the parade deck Just look in a show notes or you can put in the search engine Mario P Fields parade deck and get all access To my social media. Well, let's get ready to interview another guest who is willing to remove their armor to help other people. Back everyone to unarmor talk podcast. We got another amazing guest, but this guest today. Again, we've known each other since the 1800s. I this is not my brother family member, retired sergeant major Cortez Brown. What's up, man?

Speaker 2: 0:55

What's going on, mario, are you?

Speaker 1: 0:58

You know, still short and kicking it. Y'all know I don't have that special button, so I'm gonna hit that.

Speaker 2: 1:04

You sure I'm short and powerful, you know. You know, you know I feel about you.

Speaker 1: 1:09

You know we get in the bar fight. I'm only hitting people in the thighs and below, bro.

Speaker 2: 1:15

That's what you get. A man got a breakdown. The tree Star from the bottom to the top.

Speaker 1: 1:22

But before we get into this amazing episode, everyone get on my tiktok man. If you ain't on tiktok, get on my Instagram. You know that Facebook. Check out some of those funny videos that my wife and I started that. Actually it's for humor but it's accurate for folks who are veterans and you kind of struggle with Translating those military terms to your civilian counterparts to check it out. Yes, you want to now Check that sucker out man again and I appreciate everything you guys doing last night least. Thank you for all the charitable support for still serving incorporated WWW dot, still serving ink calm. Go there and learn more about what we're doing here in North Carolina and Pitt County. That is, before we get to North Carolina. We're done with all that intro stuff. Sergeant, major, retired Cortez Brown, everybody. He did about 38,000 Years of the Marine Corps. He inspired the hell out of me, still does. Please can you tell the listeners and viewers a little bit about yourself? Sorry, major.

Speaker 2: 2:28

Okay, I am Sergeant major Cortez, tired, 35 years, 90 states, marine Corps, various elements of every facet of the Marine Corps, marine Corps ground task force. So I did just about every element drill, instructing, recruiting I and I, inspector, instructor, duty, grunt, artillery, you know, I just people and it's just being able to surround myself. Joint building I. I Retired from the naval sent to command over and by rain, so working for a three-star Admiral and with the unit I was the senior, mr Leader for senior this, the advisor for Combined maritime forces, is the 38th nation coalition of various nations coming together to combat counterpattercy in the Middle East, which we all know.

Speaker 2: 3:29

The Red Sea, the hot topic with the that I can, I'm gonna say tonight who, these and all that, that piece. That's the place that I Was the senior listen advisor for. So I saw a lot of things coming. I saw all the things that are happening now being Perspective or projected to happen. So it was pretty ideal. And then, once again, dealing with people. So Then, for my, my makeup, in my background, I've I enjoy doing it, I enjoy dealing with people and this is something that I Look forward to doing you post military. So that's where I'm at, mary, I'm here at my probably one day where I'm at, I'm here at my wife's university, suza Pacific University, here in Covina, california, and I'm just here waiting supporting her. So my friend, mario, hometown friend, he told me he asked me the question what, where am I, what am I doing, how am I transitioning? And it's one of those things and it's like we spoke about I'm just, I'm stopping, I'm learning how to slow down.

Speaker 2: 4:45

Yeah, I'm learning how to slow down. It's just amazing. And it's amazing when you slow down and you stop. So now it used to be situation act, instant, instant obedience to order, discipline. Now I stop, pause, reflect, analyze, then act. So it's like a went from a two part process to a full part process for me.

Speaker 2: 5:11

So, I've slowed down and you'll be amazed when you slow down and you just. And then now it's scary because I've been having nightmares. I was like whoa, I made some fast, hasty decisions in my time, but because I didn't have no time, I didn't have time.

Speaker 1: 5:27

Well, let's talk about that before we jump into. Before we jump into, what is that? What are we talking about? Just so everybody knows, you guys heard Cortez give his kind of brief professional introduction, but for the listeners and viewers who have never served in the military, we're talking hundreds of thousands of people that Cortez has interacted with directly and indirectly in 30 plus years of service. I just wanna make sure that's not lost. That's a lot of people around the world, so that's good, and I've seen him personally, his passion for people. But now let's jump into the topic, cortez and you were kind of alluding to it. From our basic understanding, our basic conversations, is that since you've been out, you've had time to slow. How you set? Slow down, stop wonderful acronym, by the way where now there's some self reflection occurring, which is a choice. How has that journey been?

Speaker 2: 6:41

I'm gonna be open with you and honest, scary, unarmed talk. It's scary. It's scary in a sense because, wow, okay, now that I can stop and process and analyze things before I act, I feel like I make a much, much, much better decision on whatever that may be. I'm talking about personal and professional, you know, and family, not family, just decisions, period, because you don't get do overs and you and I come from a world where you don't get do overs and look, life expectancy of a United States Marine for infantry grunt seven seconds right. So just think about that. We had to make decisions on the fly and then only you know what I mean. Now I'm learning that I don't have to do that. I don't have to do that, I don't have to rush. I can really think about what I want to do, how I want to do it, and then do it and then, once it's done, most of the times now I'm finding I can get a do over. You know what I'm saying. So, going from the world of not having a do over to having a do over, it's a big difference. So it's actually I'm learning energy. I'm big on energy now. It just brings more positive energy with me Now when I go and do my runs in the morning, at four in the morning, I still do them.

Speaker 2: 8:18

I know why. That's part of my use off and that's part of my. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do outlet. I run 20,000 miles. I'll go to the gym and lift 900 pounds or I'll do 900 million push-ups or crunches. That's my cigarette, that's my smoke, that's my depressor, as you may say. So everybody has one, I don't care who you are.

Speaker 1: 8:43

And right yeah.

Speaker 2: 8:44

And 35 years of the military. I never used on long clock you tell me to be up at 0201. I'm up at 0201. You tell me to be up at 0335. I'm up at 0335. Right.

Speaker 1: 9:03

And because you, you, you say some wonderful things, but but you mentioned scary, and let's dig into that. Scary, what was it? What was it when you started to look back and analyze yourself, which we all know is a choice, what was it that you go, man, that's scary. Or like when I did it, I was like man, I was very emotional when I was doing certain, you know, I felt bad. What was it for you?

Speaker 2: 9:35

And that's what I. When I say scary, you want to try to get things right. You know what I mean. And I scare some of the decisions I have made, and we strive for perfection. What is that? You know, Some of the decisions that I have made. If I could do over, I probably would. And when I'm saying that's why I'm saying it was scary, because I had most of the time what I'm thinking. And when I'm doing something now, I reflect, Because there's always a situation there that may not be exactly like what you went through, but has some similarities there. So I reflect back on those things because it's it also, it's a sense of like wow, you have to pause and say, man, am I doing this or did I do that, you know?

Speaker 2: 10:29

So I had to tell myself. You know, the past is the past and now I'm striving to be a better me for the future. So that's when I say it's scary and made me reflect on some things, and then not only just what I did in the military, but for as my personal life my marriage, my daughters, you know, my family, my godson, everybody that I call you know we are a circle.

Speaker 2: 10:55

I don't have a big circle. I know you don't even worry, or so those in my circle, I hold them near and dear to my heart. So now I'm able to be at certain events that I was not able to be at, you know Right. So it's a lot of reflecting on wow. And then I would say this I knew this day was coming. When I mean that day's retirement, I knew it was coming. So I would say, me and you, at the level we were at, we started transitioning a long time ago. But what helps you to do that is people, understanding people. And I tell my wife all the time my most powerful attribute that I think I have is my ability to adjust. I will adjust and I'll adjust quickly. Think about what things were when I came, except I'm 88. A lot of things oh, don't ask them to tell this. Combat, women in combat. All these things that you wouldn't even let come out of your mouth is reality now you know.

Speaker 1: 12:01

So and say maybe in a civilian world.

Speaker 1: 12:04

And you know I've seen a lot of veterans that will talk to folks who serve for quite some time. They struggle with adjusting for various reasons. But, like you mentioned, you know you start to self reflect, which is a choice. You started to see things that maybe you didn't realize. You know, maybe you know your level of active listening or maybe being engaged who knows those? All of those things are going. Man, wait a minute, I wasn't, I was at the event, but I wasn't at the event. I wasn't actively engaged. But hasn't been anything that you've noticed about you that now you're going I'm going to improve this thing or these things now that I'm out?

Speaker 2: 12:53

I'll tell you what I noticed real fast. If I didn't like something and I didn't want to hear it, I'll drown you out, I'll overrule the conversation. I will not let you get your part across. We talking, is it like me and you having this dialogue right now? I would say something? Or just, you know, keep the focus on me, but not letting you speak your piece, cause I really that was my way of saying I didn't want it, I don't want to hear it so active listening.

Speaker 2: 13:25

I'm like I've learned to shut up, like take it in and listen, and listen to what the person may say. I may not always, I'm not going to always going to agree, but I did afford them the opportunity to do. I found I was doing that bad. I think that was that Sergeant Major in me, like yeah, you may be saying something that's right, but I'm not hearing you totally so.

Speaker 2: 13:48

But I learned that that's bad. That's bad and I would tell anybody. Active listening is an art and it requires patience. Remember we talked about the other day I was talking to you my faith, patience and my communication. Those are the three things that whoa faith. You know, when I say faith, I want to build on it, I want to be, I want to use it in my dialogue. I'm a Christian, I'm believing that, I want to be able to speak it and know it and then just stop it and understanding that and realize, when you say faith, you know I don't believe in throwing it on anyone, but if you come in and melt my house, you see signs. All of me and my wife that's. We live by Christian rules and all, that's that's I. Once you're in my four walls, that's hey, that's hey, that's that's. That's the warning order, right there.

Speaker 1: 14:43

So, and that's valuable what you brought up, because, like you said, there's, you know, people have. Everyone has their own belief system and if you, like you said, you value people, but when people are speaking their belief to another person, they cut them off, they automatically go. Well, just because I'm not, just because my, what I'm saying doesn't align with your belief system, Now, I am not, you know, I am not of value, and it's cool that you recognize that because you were doing that. I know you and I know you weren't going. You're not valuable human.

Speaker 1: 15:21

No, no, I'm not, you're never people, but people who don't recognize that will develop a personal brand of this guy. If you're not saying, if this person wants to hear, they're not going to listen to you, they're going to talk over you. And that's man. That's cause you know there's a lot of people that can't do what you just did and say what you said. That's straight. Yeah, I'm serious man.

Speaker 2: 15:43

They won't. They won't own it Cause that was that's a blind spot. That's a blind spot that initially you know what you're doing and then act like anything. It becomes a habit. You know what I mean. You know what I mean. You use it. It's a good tool to use in certain situations, but when you make it a part of who you are, and every time you approach tense situations or situations where you don't totally agree with someone, that's not good, because you're not always nobody's always right. You know.

Speaker 2: 16:15

So, started with my faith, wrote it into patience. You and I know patience, patience and patience. When I mean patient, I'm talking about A to Z Just being my ability to wait and know that sky's time. I'm using that religion reference against the guy's time. And then I always say that I just had to stop and be patient with a lot of situations that I was dealing with in life. And wow, in this sense, when you even say the word patience, you feel like a whoosh. That whoosh, I'll come through the body. It's like it's a sense of at ease. And when you say patience, I'm looking for stress-free type things in my life. Give me some non-stressers. I don't want any stressers, you know. So. Patience. When I allow myself to be patient about a very situation, whatever it may be personal, professional, whatever my family, I feel like it's a sense of ease coming over and then, communicate this right here, listening to people's stories and telling my story, and telling it with truthfulness, honesty.

Speaker 2: 17:31

You know, I'm not trying to hide anything. You know what I mean. And patient I mean. Communication can be verbal, it can be just written, or just get in front of people and just telling them, because you never know, I may say something that's gonna expire enough if somebody. You know what I mean. So those three things is I'm still working on it, I'm getting better at it.

Speaker 1: 17:54

You know you, my friend, and listeners and viewers, you guys heard it, I mean, and everything that Cortez has mentioned, those are skills. That's not a natural thing to be able to understand the power of communication. And then, really, the self-reflecting go. How am I communicating daily? That's your non-verbals, your verbals written. You know patience. You know listening to people, just listening and not listening to be like, like you mentioned, cortez, to be fake or be authentic, actually value what they're saying. Who cares if they're not saying you know value what they're saying.

Speaker 1: 18:32

But self-reflecting all kicks off with the choice of are you willing to self-reflect? Are you willing to take a look at yourself, identify things that might be scary, might you might not like what you see. You might love what you see, which you know. My next topic of conversation is but now let's talk about one thing when you reflect it back Outside of your passion for people, because I love that one and I've seen you do it, man but one thing you reflect back you go now that I like that and I'm gonna keep that skill, I'm gonna keep that one and I'm gonna grow that sucker.

Speaker 2: 19:12

Yeah, inspiring others. Yeah, inspiring others I'm. I love seeing others excel when they had doubt in their mind, and they and you have. You remember them times when you had a comment. Come here, let me talk to you. You know you can do this. If you say no to just about anything initially, that's the outcome probably gonna be no. If you don't develop that will and the determination to fight and see whatever you're trying to do, see whatever you're trying to accomplish through you know.

Speaker 2: 19:49

So, inspiring others. I love getting in front of people and inspiring them and lift them and motivate and then listen with a person. Remember that other thing I was working on Listening, listening with a purpose. You listen to them. You're like, hmm, I know it, we're out to go out and then you use whatever they like, that knowledge of football, sports, whatever it may be you drive that home and you inspire them through that and I guarantee it it works, you know, and that works for young at all. You know what I mean. So I just like inspiring people to bring out the best in them when they feel like they can.

Speaker 1: 20:28

Well, you know, every time you and I talk, I'm smiling, you know no you make.

Speaker 2: 20:32

We make each other smile because we kind of like-minded, we think a lot of light and we have the.

Speaker 2: 20:39

I've seen you do the same thing, you know, it's amazing when you can come into a room especially Marines, where we come from the hardest hit is individuals in the world and then when you're talking and you watch what you say, because when you put it out there in the universe they look it. That ain't true. So I made you, they'll tell you. You know what I mean. So I I just really really Like inspiring people that yeah, that's one.

Speaker 1: 21:11

Well, I believe this episode will continue to do that, man and audio and on the YouTube channel. Cortez, you know you're having fun in. The one last thing before you know I give you, we'd like to hear your. Your last piece of advice is the cool thing too about watching you myself, but more so you on this one, because you're the guest is how, when we retire, we become, you know, a private first class, we become recruits to our spouse. It's a joke, but, but it's funny how we go from all of these responsibilities. And even my wife, she's like Mario, you know. You know I'm the passenger queen. I'm like I'm your chauffeur, you know. Call me recruit fields, call me pullie Mario. We joke about it, but that's the beauty of it.

Speaker 2: 22:01

So I have I've shared this with you, mario I have aceturbe. You know California grass, don't? You know some places it just don't grow. So I got aceturbe my morning thing. I'll go out Every morning I'll be, I'll pick up leaves or whatever. I can't stand to see nothing.

Speaker 2: 22:20

My wife think of kind of Got it crazy, but it's just one of those things is one of those things that I it's just, I'm just a Stickler for that. You know, the little bitty things like it'll be weeds or or leaves on the ground or whatever, anything that's on that as it's coming up, I'm gonna, that's my, that's my, like Loose our moment and I and she knows I can't stand and I do it every day. Make you sure I think we probably have the the cleanest yard in the on the block, because and I don't do it for, okay, that's just me is soothing for me because I go out there and I do a lot of stuff with Fletting on what's going on, what the day may bring, what I'm I got to do in the future and just how it's going. It's just almost form a gardening for me, you know. Yeah, I think garden is therapeutic for a lot of people, so picking up and making sure my aceturbe is free of debris is my man.

Speaker 1: 23:19

Well, you guys heard it from Cortez, my friend, guys, lots of Amazing, literally tips that you can use in any industry. Man, soft skills we call them human skills self-reflect and communication, active listening, pay top dollars out there. I'm attention to detail, but the thing, the thing I want everyone to remember to and thank you so much, my friend is Find a spot, find a place, find an activity that's therapeutic to you, where you can become a better version of you. Whatever that version is, you only define that sucker and so and I use that metaphor but find a better version of you, my friend. Any last piece, last piece of advice who you would like to give the listeners and viewers before we go?

Speaker 2: 24:04

I would just say, reference to what you're saying, be true to you, understand who you are, understand what your dreams and ambitions and goals are, and let no one tell you you can't. No one Walking this earth. You know and I want to go back to the real isn't paper? That's just where I'm at now, man of above, gonna tell you that if you believe. But I just say no, you know, you know what inspires, you know what upslifts, you know what motivates you and you and you see it through and I, just, I just know, right now, you, we have so many opportunities in this world today and every day you live, there's something new that can inspire and motivate and drive to you to whatever you trying to accomplish. Go for it. Don't let no one set you down to stop you. You know, whatever it may be the scientists, man on the moon, or putting, you know, doing whatever it may be, just I'm just, I'm just big on not Trying to deflate anybody's dreams, right?

Speaker 1: 25:11

Yeah, nice. Oh, I'm a man I'm with and cool thing for me, I've seen it so and I'm still singing. But everyone, because court, I will. I will break the entire Platform because I love this guy. We're gonna talk somewhere after this, but you guys know the deal. I will see you guys. I always say that I'm gonna work on them, self-reflecting here. Hopefully you hear me or see me on a YouTube channel in a couple of weeks. But until next time, god bless you, god bless your family members and God bless your friends. I see you later, man. Thank you for listening to this most recent episode and remember you can listen and Watch all of the previous episodes on my YouTube channel. The best way to connect to me and all of my social media Is follow me on the parade deck. That is wwwParadecom, or you can click on the link in the show notes. I'll see you guys soon.