BBR #160: Emotional Regulation Amidst Global Tragedies

If you're feeling the weight of the world on your shoulders right now you're not alone. What if there was a way to keep yourself grounded while still acknowledging the reality that the world is quite literally on fire. 

In this episode we explore the path of emotional regulation and caring for ourselves while exploring the privilege inherent in this ability, and the crucial interconnectedness of humanity in a world often swamped with distress.

This episode is far more than an intellectual exploration; it’s a call to action, a demand for global responsibility in a shared humanity. 

We’ll uncover the importance of self-regulation, and the power that lies in acknowledging and working through discomfort rather than side-stepping it. And of course, we are all in this together. 

Get in there and give it a listen for more. 

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:07

What is up? Hello there, my name is Jessica Paching Bunch, you can call me JPB, and this is Brain Body Resilience. This is a podcast dedicated to growth, human development and stressing a little bit less so you can go ahead and live a little bit more. Hello and welcome back to the Brain Body Resilience podcast. I am your host, jpb. This is episode number 160.

Speaker 1: 0:39

This is coming out the first Monday of the month, which is usually a guest episode, and I had a great episode planned for today with an incredible guest. But there was a problem with the audio files. The system that I use automatically archives recordings after a certain amount of time and I let it sit there for too long. So I had to retrieve the audio files and somewhere in there the guest audio just stopped working halfway through, so you can hear me asking questions and responding sounding like I'm having a whole conversation with myself. That doesn't make any sense. So I had to reach out to the support team for the podcast recorder and hopefully they can help me solve this issue so that I can get this episode out here, maybe next week, because it's a good one and I think it's really important to end the year and maybe look into the start of the year with, because it's a topic that I think everyone thinks about, everyone asks about, so stay tuned and maybe cross your fingers on that for me. I am crossing mine.

Speaker 1: 1:54

So, moving on, no guest today, but I want to talk about something that is on my mind. Someone recently asked me if my timeline on social media was full of things about Palestine and the wars and kind of like they were. They were tired of seeing it, they were overwhelmed by it, and I've heard things about compassion, fatigue and how it's all just too much to see. And yes, it is too much to see. And yes, we are being flooded with images of destruction and devastation from places on the other side of the world, and there are so many that of these, of these things around the world that that haven't been popularized by the western gays, like the tragedies in Sudan and Armenia and dozens of other places. There's always something huge to be angry about and to grieve in the world around us. Most of the time, for those of us living in the western world in a privileged place, we just don't know about it. Quick note as I hear myself talking, I am a little bit scratchy and a little bit nasally because I am infighting a cough due cold. As for us, gum would say a little bit of a cough, a little bit of a scratchy throat. So maybe I sound weird continuing on as I hear myself in my headphones.

Speaker 1: 3:27

So I see a place here where multiple truths exist in the same time. Yes, you need to take care of yourself and your health so that you can function and be there for yourself and your loved ones, and it seems to me that protecting your peace in quotation marks, I've seen this so many places has become a way for folks to just disengage and disconnect from what is happening, and I've heard people that I have worked with in the past say things like you know, I've been self-regulating all day and at the end of the day, I'm still exhausted and feeling XYZ. Self-regulation doesn't mean pushing down or ignoring your emotions. It means you can move through them and not get stuck in one. You can't regulate your emotions away. You can't pretend they don't exist. Self-regulation and emotional regulation are about creating the space to hold multiple truths, multiple feelings and having the resources to guide yourself through them.

Speaker 1: 4:30

I started this business and, as an extension, this podcast, because of the hard things that I have lived through, because so much of what we experience, even when we think we're not we're, even when we think we are alone in these things and that nobody could possibly understand. We share these experiences with others Because there are so many things that just we as humans go through. So I started doing this so that I could share my stories and my knowledge, so others wouldn't feel so alone in navigating all of the hard shit that comes with this life. I started this to continue to practice and share with others the ways that we can create space in ourselves to hold the things that are hard, that make us angry, that hold grief, that make us scared, and to learn that we are capable of resourcing ourselves through the heavy shit that does exist, not so that we can hide from it or pretend it doesn't exist. It's not about feeling good all the time and, in this case, it's not about putting on blinders to the suffering of others so that you can feel good and pretend like it's not happening, just because it's not happening directly to you.

Speaker 1: 5:52

And the thing is we are a global community and humanity is shared. We are so isolated, even with With the immense amount of communication technology has provided for us. We have also become very isolated and we think I think sometimes that what affects the world around us does not affect us, and that's just not the case. In many different ways, what affects people around the globe does affect us, even when we're not aware of it. So, protecting your peace is a privilege.

Speaker 1: 6:32

Yes, you have to take care of yourself and at the same time, we regulate our state of being, not so that we can feel good all of the time, but so we can create space to hold the hard things, so that we can move back and forth between the states of being human, from adversity and excitement, fear, anger, to calm, relax, joy, all of these things in and out, back and forth. Yes, the world feels like a dumpster fire right now, and that's because there are things happening in the world that I don't even have a word that fits. Terrible is just not. It just doesn't cover what it is. And yes, these things exist.

Speaker 1: 7:16

And, on one hand, no, your system is not supposed to know about all of the tragic things in danger around the world. Our nervous system has not adapted as quickly as technology has advanced and evolved in order to connect us globally. We are constantly seeing threat and danger of some kind, which keeps us in a constant state of sympathetic arousal. So, yes, we do need to be aware of how much media social or otherwise we are consuming and be aware of how that is affecting us, which means that we have to be paying attention to ourselves first, and I've gone out on a tangent here, so let's bring it back. So we need to care for ourselves, yes, but burying your head in the sand and not paying attention to what is happening in the community around you, be it globally or otherwise, is a sign that you do not have the space to hold that. So this is why we do the work to create space and have the ability to oscillate between the states of being a human being living within this dumpster fire.

Speaker 1: 8:27

So if you must look away, do so, but don't hide from it because it's too hard for you. It is hard, and the ability to look away and not live in it, not be directly impacted by it, not have family who are living through it and so many other examples, is a privilege, and I think it is always best to use the privilege we have in ways that benefit both us and the world at large. My goal doesn't have to be your goal, but my goal is to have the space and capacity to hold my emotions and the resources to work through them so that I can create my best life and actually live in it. And my best life includes doing what I can to contribute to a better world where all people are safe and free. We don't all have to contribute the same way. We all have different gifts, different passions, different resources, different concerns and abilities.

Speaker 1: 9:36

And I read this today and I loved the reminder that contributing to a better world doesn't look like one certain thing. It was just a list. It says rest is resistance, boycotting is resistance, hosting is resistance, learning is resistance. Spirituality, community Therapy, joy, anger, art, doing the work, protesting, dialogue All of these things contribute. I also read this one Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief. It can feel very heavy. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it. It is heavy and you don't have to hold it all on your own. To me, this means that it's not all on your shoulders and there is absolutely a place for anger and grief. And it is heavy and it is big, and that is why we need to face it in community. I believe we do have a responsibility to our fellow humans to make the world a place that is livable, in whatever way we can contribute to that.

Speaker 1: 10:52

So wrapping this up regulation isn't about pretending something doesn't exist. It's not about creating, I'm sorry. It is about creating space and resources to be able to hold the hard things and to move your way to the other side and be able to go back and forth in and out of all of the spaces of being human, which include anger, grief and dealing with tragedy, because there are tragedies and destruction all over and while we aren't meant to see all of the things outside of our physical proximity, that we do because of the access to technology that we have, because our nervous system hasn't adapted to that, along with the understanding that the no-transcript isn't immediate physical threat. I really was trying to make it through that. My head just my brain stopped braiding for a moment. I'm gonna start that piece of my notes over.

Speaker 1: 11:57

So, yes, there are tragedies and destruction all over and we are not meant to see all of the things all over the world outside of our physical proximity in order to keep us safe, because our nervous system has not adapted to that speed, with the understanding that the threat isn't an immediate physical threat that we need to fight away or run away from. But pretending it doesn't exist doesn't make it go away. Shutting your eyes doesn't make that other person disappear, like so many of us learn when we're toddlers if you've ever seen a child play in that game. So it is my hope that we are learning to create space and resources to hold our own humanity with grace and compassion and, because of that, have the space and capacity to extend that out into the world around us, both near and far.

Speaker 1: 12:51

Thank you endlessly for being here. I am incredibly grateful for your time and your attention and I am wishing you a beautiful week, as always. If you liked this episode, do share it with a friend. I always love seeing you, which I'll share with me on IG. So keep doing that. We will do this again next week. Until then, peace out.