Fostering Faith and Fellowship through Church Involvement: A tribute to Pastor Appreciation Month

Have you ever wondered about the profound significance of the church, and the role it plays in fostering relationships? Join me, Holly Curby, as we embark on a journey to explore the essence of the church, recognizing the crucial role of pastors, particularly during Pastor Appreciation Month. In this dialogue, we unravel the importance of transparency in church governance and address the hesitations of engaging with the church. We delve into the concept of nurturing a relationship with God through prayer, devotion, and fellowship, emphasizing that it's not about religion, but about a relationship - with Jesus.

Our conversation extends to discuss how to actively support and engage in church activities, focusing on inclusivity and making everyone feel welcome. We offer insights on identifying areas of need and becoming the hands and feet of the church. Shifting gears, we discuss how to represent ourselves both inside and outside the church, working through disagreements, and using trials to shape us into better leaders. We also highlight the importance of mindful criticism. To wrap up, we analyze the power of prayer and provide practical guidance for both newcomers and regular churchgoers. This episode promises to deliver valuable insights for anyone seeking to understand and enhance their church experience.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Hi friends, welcome to Holly's Highlight, a podcast designed to encourage, inspire and equip you to intentionally live your life full of purpose. I'm your host, holly Kirby, motivational speaker, leadership cultivator, marketing strategist and personal cheerleader. Let's check out today's highlight. Is your woman's church group, social networking group, book club or friends looking for a new book to read together? Check out FaceLift embracing hope through your heartaches. The discussion guide in the back of the book will help you dive deeper into each chapter for personal reflection, encouraging connection and remind you that, no matter what season of life you're in, you are not alone. From looking at how to use your story, reflecting on challenges overcome, dealing with forgiveness and how to help others in difficult times, to addressing your idols in life, processing grief using social media and growing in faith, facelift is sure to encourage you, inspire you and equip you for your own personal growth. Facelift embracing hope through your heartaches is available through bookstores such as Barnes, noble online retailers such as Target and Walmart and, of course, everyone's favorite, amazon. Purchase your copy of FaceLift today for your group and a portion of the proceeds will benefit Huntsman Cancer Institute. For more information, visit wwwhollykirbycom.

Speaker 1: 1:27

The month of October is just a breath away and with it comes, the special occasion of sorts which is often overlooked Pastor Appreciation Month. Now, I'm probably more drawn to this holiday than others, as I was raised a PK, a pastor's kid, and I saw the hard work put into such an occupation, a ministry, a labor of love by both of my parents. My dad served as our senior pastor and my mother his right hand, and our lives were intertwined with the church, caring for the people, serving others, fellowshiping, studying God's word, worshipping. I knew no different. I was raised going to church every Sunday morning, sunday night, wednesday night and many days in between, for special events and community service opportunities and what's called revivals. Church was truly a part of our everyday life, and when a church member's loved one passed away, I saw my parents grieve with and for them. When hard work was needed to be done, I saw my parents step up and fill the gap. When people were hurting, I saw my parents reach out and, above all, I saw my parents' love through eyes and with the heart of compassion and care and genuine extension of love of our Heavenly Father.

Speaker 1: 2:34

Now, perhaps I just lost you and church has not been a place where you have found to be safe and secure, let alone called home. Perhaps something has happened in your life that has left you feeling bitter, resentful or just questioning church or even faith. There are three insights I think may be helpful, if you'll bear with me just a moment. First of the three would be that church is for sinners, not saints. If you're looking at church through a lens of perfection, no wonder it's failed you. Church is a place filled with people, and people are human. They're going to make mistakes. These people also live in a fallen world, so you are going to find people who are broken. People also find their pretenders, as you would with any organization or group or company. And, yes, there is accountability within the church, so you'll find things that make you feel uncomfortable, even convicted, but that's often revealing to you areas to grow, to learn, to heal. The second thing would be you've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything.

Speaker 1: 3:39

Each church should have resources available to you so you know what they believe, the doctrine, which is what they believe Bylaws, which is the vision and mission, and how the church is run or governed, so to speak, and the overall kind of how they operate. Then there's the constitution, so the principles and purposeful structure of the church, and even a budget. How are the funds given to the church spent or how are they used? These are important to have accessible to you, but then make sure you're in alignment with what they stand for. Although many faiths can be similar, the beliefs of a church are not necessarily universal. So speak up, ask for these items, and if a church can't or won't provide them to you, that should be a red flag.

Speaker 1: 4:23

Number three it's not about a religion, it's about a relationship. We're reminded throughout the entire Bible that God desires for us to walk with Him in our daily lives. Timothy 2, 3 through 4 tells us that God, our Savior, desires all men to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth. Just as we would nurture a relationship with a spouse, a parent, a child, a friend, we spend time with them, we get to know them, who they are, their character, their heart. We can accomplish this in a number of ways with the Lord, such as prayer, devotional time or quiet time, listening for His voice and how he would speak to you throughout your day. But one of those ways also is through fellowship with the body of Christ, the church.

Speaker 1: 5:10

But church isn't, or shouldn't be, a place to fear. Rather, we see in Acts 1 through 2, its purpose is to pray, worship, disciple, so follow Him, evangelize how to share about Him, fellowship ministers, show care and love and, yes, even lead. It's not a comparison of churches, but rather it boils down to yes, church can be, a building, compiling of the body of Christ, so people who accept the gift of salvation and want to follow His teachings. But ultimately it's about you coming to confess that you're a sinner, that you've made mistakes, believing in your heart that Jesus died on the cross for your sins, asking Jesus to forgive you of those sins, entrusting your life to Him and then reaching out through such manner to grow in that relationship with Him. So it's not about the religion or the church, but all about the relationship.

Speaker 1: 6:04

Now, as for those of us who consider ourselves the body of Christ and are frequent church goers, there are some things we can do to make church a little more inviting to those who are new or perhaps even returning to entering those church doors. Three things first of all, anticipate the need. We may never know the challenges that someone had to overcome to enter those church doors, the courage it took. Perhaps they've had a bad experience in the church, or they've never entered church doors and haven't a clue what to expect, let alone where to go once they're stepped foot inside. Might. I suggest to enter your church next time as if it was all new to you. What suggestions might you be able to provide to your church leadership team or staff In making that process more welcoming, engaging and comfortable for our guests?

Speaker 1: 6:51

Now we want to be not only problem identifiers and see the areas of opportunity, but problem solvers. So, of these areas you find, where can you help? Is it directional signage that's needed? Perhaps people placement, such as greeters at the door or people directing and answering questions midway through the hallways, or even people on hand to personally take them to the classroom or the worship center, or even show them where the nursery is or the bathrooms? How can you make each room in the church more usable and more user friendly to everyone in that room? Is the setup speaking I teach you more classroom style or more let's come together and learn kind of in a circle or a U shape? Is the TV or screens on the walls attached to where, depending where you sit, you might not be able to see what is being displayed? Or is it on a movable hinge or an angled slant so all can easily view the material? What resources are provided? Bibles within reach in case a visitor doesn't have one, writing pins and notebooks for taking notes? How about hearing devices for those who are hearing impaired? Alternative routes and access for those who can't maneuver stairs? Do you even have a system to know who visited that day and how to follow up with them?

Speaker 1: 8:08

So often we as churchgoers know what's expected, what's available, where to go or even the agenda, so to speak. But our assumptions and personal comfortability or familiarity may be contributing to someone never stepping foot in those doors again. So anticipate the need. Second thing would be each one can reach one. It is not enough to simply punch in and punch out by gracing the church with our presence, but we each have an opportunity, an obligation, to be the hands and feet to each one. Reach one Now.

Speaker 1: 8:43

For some of you, you may be thinking isn't that what the pastor and staff are paid to do? Others of you might be thinking that, hey, I'm an introvert, I don't do that. Or even I'm still new myself. What could I do? But this can look a little different for each of us and yet still accomplish the same goal my mommy's to make business cards to invite new ladies to the women's Bible study. So on a Sunday morning if she saw a new face, she'd simply introduce herself, find out the woman was visiting with someone, was new in town or simply checking things out, and then she'd provide the little card with information of the women's events coming up and basically invite that woman to come back to another event here just for her. Now, my mom didn't oversee the women's Bible study. She wasn't the women's leader of the church and yet this was such a supportive role to play within that women's ministry there at the church, but also it was so well received by the recipient. I've had numbers of women whom I've crossed paths with, who have come and shared with me. Your mom invited me to this or that and that's why I started attending church or that's why I came back, or that's why even I have a personal relationship with Jesus.

Speaker 1: 9:50

Another way might be. I remember visiting churches with my dad back when he was the executive director for Utah Idaho Center Baptist Convention and he had to visit over 150 churches at least once a year. Well, one of these really stood out to me as, following the service, the church would hold a potluck. Now, this was a small town, but something they did every Sunday. It was always held at the innkeeper's place the baker brought the bread, the butcher brought the meat. It was really special Now we were just in town for the day, but their hospitality was so welcoming that if I did live in the area you got to believe I would be returning to that church each Sunday. They just showed such care and community. Well, your church might be too large to host a weekly potluck, but you could always plan your Sunday meal as if you were going to invite someone to join you for lunch in your home afterward, or even extend an invitation for someone visiting to meet you at a local restaurant for lunch following the service. Again, a simple way to be the hands and feet in supporting your pastor and staff and representing your church and extending such care to those entering those doors. Now I'm so grateful for a women's leader who saw me in a Sunday school class one time and came up and invited me to the women's Bible study, and then she even gave me the material, so the book that they were using for the study, and concluded with I'll save you a seat on Wednesday. Wow, that was pretty assertive, right. Well, not only did I feel welcomed, like I had something to take with me to know what was going on, but I felt wanted and that I'd have someone who'd be expecting me when I showed up. Guess what I went. So make it easy for people to come in the doors by being their person, saving them a seat, getting the material they may need, informing them dates and times. Be their person.

Speaker 1: 11:36

Now it's worth mentioning here that it's important to not only welcome people, but be sure to include them. I'm not talking just each one reach one here. I'm talking about including the newcomers and what could appear as your inner circle. As with anywhere schools, work, neighborhoods, just friendships overall church is no different that cliques can form and I'm not saying you have to forego your best relationships because there are newcomers there, but look for ways to include them. Maybe there's a getaway retreat that's coming up. Invite that person to room with you and your bestie, or you and your bestie can actually decide to divide and conquer by each staying with someone new to make them feel included. Is there a group of your moms going to the park with your littles? What's the harm in inviting that new lady, regardless if she has kids or not, going to see a movie with some people from church. Why not invite that newbie to join you? Please notice that people are very much aware of cliques and it doesn't put off a welcome. We're glad you're here, vibes, so just make sure to be inclusive.

Speaker 1: 12:42

The third thing we can do is follow up. I've been to a church before, whereas long as you were there in the church building you were kind of seen, but if you missed a Sunday out on site, out of mind. I've also visited a church once where, just by walking in the doors one time, the pastor sought me out following the service, gave me a welcome basket with some fun goodies, such as a mug and hot chocolate and popcorn. It also had a survey with a church pin in it including a stamped envelope to easily return the survey to the church, and it was just wanting to know about my experience. Then, about a week later, they followed up with me and just let me know that it was nice having me and asked if I had any questions and even invited me to return. Don't expect people to just show up in your church. Reach out and follow up with them. It goes a long way. Now this brings me to supporting our pastors and our staff during pastor appreciation month. Ask any school teacher and they'll tell you teacher appreciation week makes them smile.

Speaker 1: 13:44

The intentional acts of kindness, gifts, upwards of affirmation, helping them out in the classroom Basically every language of love is covered here. Team member appreciation for many companies lifts moods and improves the work culture, as employees feel seen and heard and valued and appreciated. Well, it's no different for our pastors, and, I'll add, in their staff. There's so much that goes into serving in the ministry profession that many won't understand and a lot of it they'll never even see. It's not just preparing and preaching sermons, organizing events and activities or meeting with people for counsel, but it's also, as shared on ministrymatterscom, career coaches, business advisors, custodians and janitors, as they're always picking up after people, arbitrators, social workers, volunteer coordinators, ceos, fundraisers, recruiters, trainers, scholars, writers, managers, public relationists and sometimes even politicians. Serving in ministry is a huge task, often a thankless one, and even James 3.1 warns not many of you should become teachers or leaders of the church, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness. So, yes, pastors are going to be held at a higher accountability too.

Speaker 1: 15:09

So how can we best show our support to those in ministry this past or appreciation month? Three things. First of all, show up, whether that be actually showing up to events and classes and activities offered, showing up and serving or volunteering in areas of need, or showing up with using your skills and talents. There is so much time and energy put into everything done through the church. Show up and partake, encourage them by being present, and not just your body, not just another number, but attention and engagement, even response following, to let them know their efforts matter or what you enjoyed about it. The services, offerings and opportunities of a church is also not a one-person task. It takes a village. Now, I understand better than some that there are seasons of our volunteer time, but we can still pitch in and help in some way. If not volunteering to do something, maybe it's simply to bring something or contribute in some way to help lighten the load. And then, for days that have skills such as marketing, financial mindsets, connections in one way or another, would you be willing to simply show up and offering your services or being that person on the other end of the phone when they need advice or counsel themselves. So how can you show up? Number two represent well. If you ask pastors, they probably would say their least favorite part of their role is babysitting, or the drama At News Flash. That can be said from almost any leader at any company or organization.

Speaker 1: 16:45

Representing ourselves well can be covered in such a plethora of ways, whether it be how do we conduct ourselves outside of the church walls? After all, why should someone waste their time coming to church if you behave or act just as they do? Have justice, found out their worldly living lifestyle, as they might have, or they're a strange family member? It could be representing ourselves within the church walls by working out differences. I mean, come on, you get into disagreements with your own households, right. Well, why would church be any different? It's a lot of different people with a lot of different opinions, attitudes and emotions, coming from a lot of different backgrounds and upbringings. The spoiler alert you will be offended, you will offend someone else, your feelings will be hurt and you will hurt another's feelings. But just like you should or hopefully would within your own home or valued relationships, work through them, we should do so within the church too. Don't church hop meaning get upset and leave the church. There are going to be a different set of issues. There too, instead, put in the effort to grow, to mature, to learn to forgive and work through it.

Speaker 1: 17:57

Now I used to direct the youth ministry at the last church my dad pastored before he retired, and there was a situation once that brought me pain and discouragement. And a dear father of one of the youth I led so wisely gave me the book Healing for those who have Been Crucified by Christians by Jean Edwards and this father's words of encouragement to me that he and other parents had my back. They saw the sacrifices I was making, the attack from a couple of the upset parents who didn't get their way. It provided me with not only a resource to push through, but a reminder that it happens to the best of us, so don't quit. I could have easily quit up and walked down and carrying a grudge against the church, but instead I chose to use it as something that helped me persevere, grow in my faith and even become a better, stronger leader as a result.

Speaker 1: 18:47

This showing up could also be in our talk about our church. We may not agree with everything, but how we voiced our thoughts and opinions to those who can make the change, or are we sharing it with our neighbor who can't do anything about it, but it makes for great gossip. Do we smile and ask how we enjoyed something, yet critique it on the drive home? Church isn't a performance for our entertainment friends. May we not be so quick to give it a reading after each event or service. So, whether outside the church walls or within, represent the church well At number three, pray.

Speaker 1: 19:26

Pray for the leadership of the church, for their wisdom and discernment, provisions and protections, guidance, direction, unity, forgiveness of one another, grace. Bave them in prayer, their families, their minds, their work and efforts. Pray for the congregation, so people who attend the church Pray for their walk with the Lord and growth in their faith. Pray for encouragement in their days, good stewardship with what's entrusted to them, for their families, their witnessing opportunities, an example of life lived to those around them, for protection of the church itself from harm and destruction, maintenance issues For those who had entered the doors that they'd find a place that is best for them and that God would protect your church from those who are there only to cause division and harm. And thank God. Thank God for the financial giveings, the building itself that allows, all together for the leaders and volunteers who invest their time toward the ministry and the serving and care to others. Pray for our government, both local and national.

Speaker 1: 20:28

James 5.16 tells us that the prayer of a righteous man has great power. As it is working. Yes, prayer is both powerful and effective. So pray Now. There are so many squirrels that I could chase from here after 43 years as being a pastor's kid and then also an avid churchgoer. But from here I think it's best to conclude with some practical, actionable steps.

Speaker 1: 20:51

For any listener, for the one who hasn't stepped foot in a church for some time, for whatever reason, I'd simply encourage you to hop online and check out churches that may be of interest to you and then be brave and step foot in those doors this month. For the churchgoer, might you take the moment to text an encouraging message to your leadership staff at church, send a note of appreciation in the mail or even put together a token of your appreciation? My mom used to make a handmade or homemade meal for each family of the leadership team, so they had one night off of cooking. Our family was influential in a recent church of putting together a potluck after Sunday morning service to honor our church leadership staff and the last church where my dad served as pastor, put together a little photo album full of gift cards for entertainment places such as theaters and movies and sporting events, and also eating establishments and even a hotel night stay for my parents. And even now I provide a meal for the church leadership staff once during the month of October for their staff meeting.

Speaker 1: 21:53

Just do something big or small, it all matters in simply showing your appreciation. Church is not a competition mine is better than yours but rather a community effort in furthering the kingdom of God. And just as we all have different likes and desserts you know cookies versus pies or cakes or those who don't even like dessert so we have different preferences and worship styles and size of congregations and in church overall. As Hebrews 1025 encourages us, let us not give up meeting together a summer in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another, and all the more as you see the day approaching. Now.

Speaker 1: 22:33

If you'd like to hear more episodes related to today's highlight, I would encourage you to check out several of them. In season one, there's episode 11, the hope of Christmas, where we talk about having a personal relationship with Jesus and what that looks like. In season two, there's episode four, 18 and 21, the three ways to use your personality assessment results and that can help you understand your personality and how you relate to others. And then the 21, how to be a Barnabas or in a Kardashian world. This is more about encouragement, how to encourage others. And then season three. Episode four is how to deal with grief. So for those of you who are dealing with some drama or experiences that have made it hard to reenter those church doors, this might be a good one for you. Also, episode five, talking about the challenges of prayer. Episode eight in season three, how to have tough conversations. Going on to episode 16, how to be a good steward. Episode 18, five ways to help others in tough times. So this would give you tips on being that body of Christ and helping each other. And then the final two I'd recommend would be season four. There's episode eight and 14. In eight, it's five tips to making tough decisions, so this could probably be geared to those who are looking for a church home. And then also in 14, there are a personal representation, so five ways to represent yourself in a positive way. On that note, boss's day is just around the corner, so join us next time as we speak with business expert Justine Beauregard on transforming your leadership, which is going to be a tribute to boss's day.

Speaker 1: 24:05

Happy Pastor Appreciation Month. Enjoy celebrating your ministry team. I'd love to see photos and hear your ideas executed. So connect with me and post those pictures on Facebook at Holly's Highlights, or Instagram at Holly Kirby, and I hope you have a wonderful day. Thank you for joining me on this journey of life. I hope that today's highlight has been encouraging, inspiring and equipping so you can go out and live your life full of purpose. I'd be honored if you'd take a moment to leave a review or, better yet, subscribe. We can also stay in touch by joining my email list at hollykirbycom. That's H-O-L-L-Y-C-U-R-B-Ycom. Until next time, make it a great day for a great day.