The Darkest Light

My Body, My Choices, My Baby—My Birth Story

Kanya D'Almeida

How many of us can say that our birth stories are truly our own? How many women in Sri Lanka can look back on their births and say, with absolute certainty, that their voices were heard, their choices were respected, their bodies were listened to, their needs were met, their consent was sought, and that their birth experience was their own?

I don’t know many. After nearly 3 years of collecting stories from women of all walks of life, I have very few examples of what I would call sovereign birth experiences. Stories where the birthing person led the way—the entire way. Stories where a woman knew, and demanded, and received exactly what she wanted to ensure that her birth remained hers. 


Enter Yasodhara Pathanjalie. She operates according to a very simple logic: my body, my choices, my baby—my birth story. From the start of her pregnancy to the moment she left the hospital with her newborn (12 hours after he entered the world), she ensured that she always retained full bodily autonomy.

This meant no tests, procedures or interventions without her explicit consent. It meant not allowing herself to be pressured, bullied or coerced into doing things she wasn't comfortable with. It meant writing a birth plan and sticking to it—no matter how unconventional, inconvenient, or unfathomable her birth preferences seemed to the medical professionals and hospital staff.

Links and resources:

On delayed cord clamping

In this podcast, Dr. Judith Mercer of University of Rhode Island discusses the science and medical research around delayed cord clamping:
https://academicobgyn.com/2011/02/26/academic-obgyn-podcast-episode-31-delayed-cord-clamping/

In this article, Dr. Rachel Reed discusses the science behind 'cord blood collection' and its impact on neonates:
https://midwifethinking.com/2015/09/16/cord-blood-collection-confessions-of-a-vampire-midwife/?amp

On internal vaginal exams/cervical checks during labor

According to the Association for Improvements in Maternity Services (AIMS), cervical checks are an OPTIONAL procedure that should always be preceded by explicit and informed consent:
https://www.aims.org.uk/information/item/vaginal-examinations-in-labour#post-heading-5

This article in the American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology discusses the risks of 'routine cervical checks' during labor:
https://www.ajog.org/article/S0002-9378(20)31575-1/fulltext

Research is emerging on the links between forced medical procedures during labor (such as non-consensual vaginal examinations) and sexual assault. This article published by the Oxford University Press discuss the theoretical framework for understanding obstetric violence as a form of sexual assault:
https://academic.oup.com/socpro/article/70/1/55/6324470

The US-based organization Birth Monopoly has begun a project of documenting the global epidemic of obstetric violence