Living Lucky® Podcast with Jason and Jana Banana

Evict the Negativity Gremlins: Reclaim Your Mental Real Estate!

• Jana and Jason Shelfer • Season 6 • Episode 3

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Holiday cheer gone rogue? Did your festive family trip take a nosedive into negativity? We feel you, because we just lived it! Buckle up, Living Lucky® family, because this episode is a raw and relatable deep dive into the sneaky trap of awfulizing: that mental mudslide where every hiccup snowballs into a blizzard of doom.

Join us, Jason and Jana Banana, as we unpack the baggage of our recent Kansas adventure. From snowman smiles to sniffles and frowns, we expose the real-life impact of awfulizing on relationships, well-being, and just plain living your best life. This ain't just a holiday blues rant, though. We're serving up tactics and aha moments to help you evict those pesky pessimistic tenants from your mental real estate.

In this episode, you'll discover:

  • The secret language of awfulizing: How "always" and "never" build brick walls of negativity that block out the sunshine.
  • From meltdown to mindset shift: Learn the tools we used to claw our way back from the holiday negativity spiral.
  • Why your mental real estate is priceless: Stop renting it out to the gloom! Discover how to cultivate a "Living Lucky®" mindset, even when life throws snowballs.
  • Actionable tips to turn your car around: Ditch the doom scroll and grab your sled! We'll equip you with practical strategies to combat negative thinking and embrace positivity.

This episode is your battle cry against awfulizing. It's a reminder that you, yes YOU, can choose to live lucky, no matter the weather forecast. So grab your headphones, warriors, and let's conquer those negative thought mountains together!

P.S. We're still brainstorming the perfect title for this epic episode. Got any ideas? Hit us up in the comments!

#LivingLucky #Awfulizing #HolidayBlues #PositivityRevolution #NewYearNewYou #MindsetTransformation #Inspiration #MentalHealth #Gratitude #PositiveVibes #FamilyRelationships #StressManagement #EmotionalResilience #HappinessTips #DoomLoop

Remember, you're not alone in your fight against negativity. Join the Living Lucky® tribe and start sledding towards a brighter future today!

Keep living lucky, everyone!
Jason & Jana Banana
Living Lucky® Podcast

P.P.S. Don't forget to check out our website, www.livinglucky.com, for more resources and tools to help you live your best life!
how to combat awfulizi

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The 4 pillars of Living Lucky
Believe in yourself
Believe in the people around you
Believe in your circumstances and
Believe that God is working through you, for you, and always conspiring in your favor.

*Previously Recorded

Speaker 1:

Are you ready to create a life you crave? Let's spin that doom loop of negativity into an upward success cycle and start living lucky. Good morning.

Speaker 2:

I'm Jana, I'm Jason and we are living lucky. We're talking about awfulizing today.

Speaker 3:

Awfulizing that is. It's a fun word Like when I heard it the first time I was like that's fantastic.

Speaker 2:

It's a horrible word. It's awful, it's a catastrophic word.

Speaker 3:

But it's so fitting, because so many people awfulize or catastrophize.

Speaker 2:

Oh, my goodness, and I did this. I fell into this pattern again. I feel like we do this podcast just to coach me.

Speaker 3:

I almost wonder if we all awfulize in some area, like in that area where the stress is super high, where we have those crazy feelings that kind of overtake us and then we just lean into it. It's falling down the doom loop.

Speaker 2:

We just got back from our Kansas trip. Many of you know that we went to Kansas for Christmas and if you've been listening, you know that I get stressed out over the holidays. I literally start getting stressed out. I love Halloween for some reason, and then, once Halloween is over, I am like, oh my God, it's Black Friday. Things start getting fast and hectic. Yeah, that whole Thanksgiving holiday and it's like, oh my gosh, people need gifts and there's just a lot that happens.

Speaker 3:

It's Thanksgiving, which is my family. Then there's travel plans.

Speaker 2:

And it feels like the end of the year. So work seems to like oh my gosh, it's fourth quarter, we got to get all these things done.

Speaker 2:

You got to wrap up all these goals and stress just elevates for me and it always seems the final popper of the zit, the big white pus that comes out of the zit Gross. I know that's disgusting, but for me that's when we spend time with family, which went really extremely well. We were having a fabulous trip. I mean we were just having a wonderful time. We went sledding, we went to see my parents' brand new house, which was absolutely beautiful.

Speaker 3:

Santa came to visit.

Speaker 2:

Santa came to visit, brought presents for everyone. We actually built a snowman, which was so fun. I haven't done that since I was a kid.

Speaker 3:

Even had a snowman kit that had the coal and the nose and the and it turned out, the whole family got to come, which we weren't expecting.

Speaker 2:

So that was a nice little surprise. I mean everything was just turning out magical All the food, all the preparations and it was so awesome. And then, after everyone left, it was like the day everyone left. I mean there were days there. I mean we've got kids and babies and toddlers and lots of different big personalities and I could feel the tension in the room.

Speaker 3:

Building, it's building. I can feel it. That's energy.

Speaker 2:

That's energy. I could feel it in the room and for some reason my body was like oh, I don't know, I don't know. And as soon as everyone left I told Jason I got to go to bed, I'm not feeling well and my body just gave out. It shut down. I got sick. I don't know if you can still hear it in my nose. I've been sniffling and sneezing and coughing and then, once I went to bed I was in bed had diarrhea and you probably didn't need that detail, did you?

Speaker 2:

But I had taken cold medicine for two days and then of course yes, of course you know. I'm getting up to go to the bathroom and my mom says to me in passing, what do you think is wrong with you? And I say it's being around family. That's what's wrong with me. And of course that didn't really fly very well.

Speaker 3:

Yes, that was taken very, because they did a great job hosting.

Speaker 2:

Yes, and then it, just from that point on it, went into a doom loop. Now, when I say it went into a doom loop, it means I said something, and then, of course, I said more Will tell me more. Well then, I did, I told more.

Speaker 2:

So, then, it's presenting the evidence of how family causes stress and how family this happens every time, mom, every year when I'm around family at Christmas time, I get sick. It happens every year. My body expects it and of course, they don't know or haven't studied the psychology behind any of this, so they don't understand that our bodies almost become the minds.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, when you take all your resources and put it towards defending the stress. It doesn't defend against anything else.

Speaker 2:

It lowers your immune system is what it does, and so it's not that it's psychosomatic, even though it may seem like that. It's that it's lowering your immune system and you are more susceptible to colds and flu and whatnot.

Speaker 3:

And the constant going and going and going is going to wear you down. There's a time when your body just says it's time to stop, and if you don't stop, I'm going to stop you.

Speaker 2:

And then, all of a sudden, when I look back at this magical vacation that we had just taken, the one that I just described to you, with a snowman, and A beautiful new house. Sledding.

Speaker 3:

And getting to see family that we haven't seen in a long time.

Speaker 2:

All of a sudden, I started describing it as oh my gosh, my dog has a skin condition. I had to take her to the vet twice. I mean, that was a pain in the butt. Everybody was nervous. It was costly too. It was costly. It felt like there was so much traffic on the road. I mean, all of a sudden I started seeing, and my reticular activating system started noticing Everything that was wrong recalling all the negative aspects of the trip.

Speaker 3:

It's building that evidence and putting those bricks in the wall. And then you build that wall up so high and Because while you're not having the conversation, while you're laying in bed, you have time to ruminate over those things and awful eyes and catastrophize, and start building that wall so high that the next time that person comes in contact with you and there's any type of hey, prove, you, prove your point now. Then you just don't that whole wall on them.

Speaker 2:

Yes. And may not be prepared for it and and my mom didn't deserve that, which is exactly what I did to my mom. I was like here, here, my bricks, I'm not feeling. Well, yeah, there you go. And she wasn't expecting it.

Speaker 3:

So there's an Iqwell.

Speaker 2:

There's a ripple effect. There's a ripple effect. So the first lesson I want to say is when you start awfulizing, you are contagious. You are contagious. Your energy is always contagious strong and you are affecting everyone around you and they don't know why and Most people are going to take it personally, unless they have training and tools to be able to zoom out and look at this from an and eagles perspective.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and when you take it personally, then you're gonna fall into that fight flight or free fawn, uh-huh, and You'll. You'll see people with that glazed over look in their eye and that's the fawn. You'll see people say I got to get out of this room, I got to get out of the situation and they'll just leave or they will bite back hard and and then, next thing, you know, I opened up Pandora's box.

Speaker 3:

Welcome to Janice world and it and it happens. This happens, though, in small situations, it happens in Family situations, it happens at work, it happens all over the place, and I do believe that it happens to most people in different areas of their life, even positive people and it was it literally had.

Speaker 2:

There was a moment where it Took a turn. There it did. There was a moment it all just took a turn and it had to do with me and my state. I was. I was not feeling Well, I was drowsy. I was feeling sorry for myself. I had been in bed alone for two days. I was thinking why isn't anyone checking on me? Doesn't anyone love me?

Speaker 3:

just another brick in the wall right.

Speaker 2:

I'm like, oh my gosh, here I am home and I'm not feeling well. Why isn't anyone knocking on the door saying, oh my gosh, is there anything I can do for you?

Speaker 3:

now, let me now, let me start building that wall to now. I'm reinforcing multiple walls to dump on someone.

Speaker 2:

And then, you know, I get up to go the bathroom and then I am caught by this. Oh my gosh, what do you think is wrong with you?

Speaker 3:

or even if it's how it's so good to see you. I'm glad you're feeling better. You still have that wall between the two of you and, and I just happen to say it's family.

Speaker 2:

That's what's wrong with me, and, and not just Turned in a punch bowl Farting and then now, all of a sudden, we've started to awful eyes and I have tainted this whole magical Holiday trip. So it's and now I feel guilty and ashamed of myself, because the last thing I wanted to do was to bring negative energy to Anyone. I always want to uplift people, so what?

Speaker 3:

if it's not you tainting it? What if it's just you allowed it to become tainted? Because all these things did happen? True? Now, whether it's perception because we talk about perception a lot yes, it's all about how we perceive things, but everyone's truth is their truth, true? So if you just allowed it to build on the negative, it's not necessarily your fault. It's just you didn't have the capacity, through your sickness, through the cold medicine, through all that, to be aware of the evidence you were building and really be aware of what the end outcome was going to be. Through all this and as you built that evidence, it just became all you could really see. Oh yeah.

Speaker 2:

And so now, while I'm in this, while I'm thinking about it and I'm awfulizing in my head, I mean, it just kept going downhill as we're driving home, we hit a tire on the way home. That was scary, and then we had to pull over and we actually had to take the car to a, a dealership. A dealership, which set us back, you know. And then Jason starts getting antsy because he's like, oh my God, I gotta get on the road. And we've been on the road now for two and a half days.

Speaker 3:

You've gotta get on the road. It just felt like it's like, oh, I'm gonna be fine. I mean it was a full, it was a full semi-tire in the middle of the night.

Speaker 2:

They couldn't see it coming. It was in the middle of the night and it scared Tater to death. She started shaking. It scared me to death. I was like, oh my gosh.

Speaker 3:

It scared me to death. The car in front of us hit it on the side, which popped it up into right in the front of us. No going around it. It was like you either try to get around it or just go through it. But if you try to get around it you're gonna hit somebody or wreck the car.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. And then, of course, I could hear everyone saying well, why were you driving that late at night? Well, because we wanted to get home. We were anxious to get home and we had been stuck in traffic and I wasn't feeling well. We kept having to stop because I had diarrhea. You probably didn't need that detail, which I've given to you twice now.

Speaker 3:

Everyone loves the juicy detail.

Speaker 1:

Oh boo.

Speaker 2:

Boo, see how awfulizing works. So let me just give you a couple clues, because when you start awfulizing, we start using specific language, we start using general language, like always. This always happens, this always happens every single time.

Speaker 3:

It's kind of like an absolute. You never do this or this, always happens.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 3:

You never support me.

Speaker 2:

Yes or everybody. We start using these general terms and in our heads it starts feeling very pervasive, permanent, personal. I mean it's weird how the distortion starts to happen almost in slow motion.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, it's the cement that's putting these bricks together and holding it true for you.

Speaker 2:

Yes, yes.

Speaker 3:

Because now it's like everybody is against me. Yes, everyone, not some people, not one person, not a couple people. Everyone is against me. This always happens 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year. And the question is is it true? And sometimes, if we just pause and get aware of when we use that kind of language, say, is that true?

Speaker 2:

Is it true? Is it true? Is it absolutely true? Is it absolutely?

Speaker 3:

true? Is there evidence anywhere else that it's not true? And if it's not true anywhere, could it not be true most places? And that I'm just awfulizing a couple incidences and making that the bigger picture instead of the bigger picture, which is really that most people do support me, most people do love me. It doesn't always happen. It's usually that I'm in a great mood and very positive, but these couple of things spun me out and into a spiral.

Speaker 2:

And then you start going to worst case scenarios and you start seeing the absolute pit of everything and everybody, and even yourself and God.

Speaker 3:

But when you build that wall up, it's all you see.

Speaker 2:

Ah, awfulizing. Just be familiar with the term and the more conscious and where you are of it, you might catch yourself, and I hope that we save you from going down this path.

Speaker 3:

Yeah just turn it around, turn the car around.

Speaker 2:

Just say you know what I'm not doing this.

Speaker 3:

I'm not going down that road.

Speaker 2:

I listened to Janna and Jason today. They talked about awfulizing. I'm not gonna be Janna, I'm not gonna do that.

Speaker 3:

My life and time is worth more than to spend it in my renting space out to the negative in my mind.

Speaker 2:

Ooh, ooh, I might have to rewind that and listen to that one again. I won't make you resay it. Ha ha, ha ha. All right, thanks for listening, guys.

Speaker 3:

Keep living lucky.

Speaker 1:

Have a great day. All right, bye-bye. If the idea of living lucky appeals to you, visit us at startlivingluckycom.