S4E50 I think affluent men prefer educated women

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Transcript

Speaker 1 (0s): Okay, posing Bowties. What's up? you know, I had written a couple of notes. you know, I'm always writing a couple of notes and I never really get into a whole lot, right? but I wrote some notes down. I wanna say this is maybe like three months ago. It was around January and I was thinking, I guess something made me think of it. I don't know what made me think of this, but I think we were talking about, or I was reading or listening to something about education, whatever.

And it made me think about how affluent men actually want educated women now before people start losing their mind. Listen, I'm not saying that their education is defining of the woman, right? But they want ab, I mean, affluent men want educated women. And I remember thinking about like Mark Zuckerberg, you know, he found his wife in college.

Look at, I look at George Clooney, he's married to like Amal Amal, I, I don't remember her name. You look at like these, these power, like these, a lot of the people who are in tech, like they find, they found these, these tech companies. I'm pretty confident that when Amazon Guy I think Jeff Bezos was his first wife, was Mackenzie or something or other, I'm pretty sure she was educated.

but I can, I cannot confirm a hundred percent But. anyway, I, think about like these really high profile men who, these businessmen or whatever, they, they find these women in college and stuff like that. And I know a lot of times like we'll be out here if you hear something and somebody will, you know, talk about like, oh, these black women and all these degrees. but I find is many of the affluent men, like having educated women. I was talking to a friend of mine that I know and he happens to be a black absolute person and his wife is educated and stuff like that.

I remember having a conversation with him and even the ones that like, when they're like, when people wanna have their little mistresses or whatever it is, like at least the ones that I know, I'm not saying I know a lot of people have mistresses. Lemme rephrase that. What I'm saying is even that, like those women had some form of education or whatever, there was something about conquering this woman's in education. I'm not saying this is all men. I shouldn't have to qualify But. anyway, lemme tell you some of the reasons why, and I can revert back to the conversation I had, like number one I.

think what happens is you share some of the same values, especially if you want to have children, your progeny, right? Like, like children that will carry on a family name or whatever. But when you have somebody who's educated, that's not to say that you can't find this in a non-educated person, but I do know, like they tend to share some of the same values, right? They tend to like the woman can work, but it's almost like a badge of honor from what I've heard.

When there is a man who is applicant who's of means And, they can say, my wife doesn't have to work. I've heard men in my environment, like now this was like several years back, like I'm told my wife, she doesn't have to work. These men are like, Hey, I don't want you to be stressed out. You can work if you want to, but you don't have to. I've seen it, I've heard it, I've heard people with their own mouth tell me this. Many people have a couple of dollars and, and then men who are like really affluent.

But the the main thing is like, it's like a badge of honor. When they say like, I have enough for both of us and I don't want you to be stressed. They, they like the fact that a woman she can pass on when they have children, those shared values, right? They understand. They understand how businesses may, they understand a lot of things. So, you know, if you're talking about creating a legacy, like a financial legacy, there's different types of legacies, right?

You have the, your children that you want to pass your, your DNA through, you know, like this comes from a outline of so-and-so's or you know, your, your business acumen or whatever it is. You can pass those things on. But it's like they understand the values that, that this, this, this man, this person is trying to pass on I think also too more, more started talking to men of being, believe it or not. Now it could just be the ones that I've been fortunate to be surrounded by, but believe it or not, although they like the book of younger women, don't get me wrong because there's a lot of 'em out there.

but I know a lot of them also want some that they can have. Like they want to be challenged, not in terms of like competition, but at the end of the day, many of these men, they go home And, they still suffer with their wife. What do you think of this? What have you observed? Blah, blah, blah. Like they have their business side, but then they have what happens when they get home. So when they get home, they also have that encouragement, they have that support because that woman gets certain things. Right? Now that's not to say that you can't get that from a woman who's not educated, but I'm going based off of what I've heard people actually say like, I want somebody smart.

I don't want a doormat, I don't want this. This is what I've heard. I actually, one time there was a y well, in relation to me, he's young at the time he was 20, 19, 9 I think he was 29. And I was in my early to mid forties. I I not, maybe mid forties, I can't remember. This is several years back, a couple years back.

And he is, he was completing his degree late. He was getting his software developed, he was getting his computer science degree, I think he, he should be done by now. And I remember they were paying him his salary, if I remember correctly. He was almost done, it was still on a low end, but it was 149. No, it was $139,000. When I say low end, I'm talking about compared to the market where we are, the market area.

But it's because he didn't have as much experience and he was finishing up his degree. But even still, he had, he has a wife who if I remember correctly, was a teacher. He told her, you don't have to work if you don't want to. They have their home and everything like that. He was like, once I complete this and I will, you know, be able to command the highest salary, et cetera, et cetera. He like, you don't have to work. But in the same token, he loved the fact that she was educated that she could do her own thing.

When you listen to him talk and I was like, listen to this young man. I do think that it is kind of like a badge of honor. When I listen to man, they say like, Hey, somebody was telling me one time about it, a guy out west, like he, he came from out west and he was saying like, he was talking one time and like, why I hear this? It was something along the lines of like, I retired my wife or something like that. 'cause he, this guy was making love me or maybe somebody was telling me something about how I heard this, but it was basically saying like, I retired my wife, you know what I mean?

She's got more education degrees than me and now she's home with the kids. It's like a badge of honor to be able to say like, my wife doesn't need to work, but basically she can take care of if she wants to the home, these children, et cetera. A couple more notes I wrote down, but I think it gave them like this social standing as well, almost like converse in multiple groups, right? Like she's capable of holding her own, she's aware of certain things traveled up like that.

So like, it was like a badge of honor, like a sense of cry to be able to retire. The wife, like I think the wife they were talking about, it had like a PhD or something. I, I don't remember exactly what it was, but she wanted to, this was not a force thing. This man was like, you know, I was like, if she just wants to, she doesn't have to, but he was like, okay, but I think there was something attractive about the fact that this woman was super educated and he was still like a, they didn't feel like y'all, I'm still the provider.

I'm still doing it. Like, you know, this woman is now like you are a unit that it's not, it's, I always say like as long as you have agency and yourself and you're capable of doing certain things, then I say, do what you wanna do. Go for it. I don't think it's wrong. If you want to, you know, be a homemaker or whatever, it's But. anyway, the point I'm making was I had conversations with several men. I work in a male dominated environment, right? I mean, listen to some these men or like when you talk to men who on companies, you know, they're like, my wife can do it whatever it is that she wants.

And most of their, their wives are, are, are educated. I know many people are stay at moms And. they, they were educated, right? but I just thought that was really interesting when I listened to some of the talking points from various groups of people and they're like, we want traditional women and all sort stuff like that. And I think it's promoted like this woman is a homemaker, but they don't talk about the fact that, you know, many women still want them to achieve their education.

I just think that they I think many of these men who are aff they still like feeling like they have this traditional life that they can have stay home or whatever it is. but I also know too that many of these men, you know, they're able to afford a lot of help so that they can have women who stay home and not be as stressful. But. anyway, I just wanted to throw that out there. 'cause I thought it was a really interesting, I guess couple of conversations I've had.

I too, but when I listen to some of the things that some of these men say, like how they like the fact that like if they're going out and they're doing it, like they're, you know, they're like ball and their wife understands like you can't both compete at the same time. It doesn't mean that I can't support you or support their dreams, but there's a time and a place where everything, now I know a lot of times people are gonna come for me crazy, right? But like I said, I remember when I met my husband, I actually met him in a work environment when we decided to get married and all stuff like that.

I was stay at home mom for like about three years and ah, my kids still went daycare too. But the point I'm making was there were certain things that I wanted to do in my career that I took the backseat for a while and I supported my husband on certain things and then I returned to work and he was really cool about making sure that I was happy and so that I was bringing really good income too. But the point I'm making was I didn't wanna be dependent on someone and I just thought it was really cool that it was a partnership, right?

Give or take. But I remember this one guy I was talking to one time and he had like several businesses and someone who sold some cats, whatever, he invested in some of her stuff. He was always saying like, you know, you always wanna have a woman who gets it right? Want a woman who she wants to work fine, but if I'm the primary breadwinner, you want to make sure that they understand like he wants to, he said you, you still support your partner and whatever it's that she wants to do.

But at the end of the day, you wanna make sure that the primary breadwinner, the person who's whatever, you know, you wanna be able to ensure that you don't mess that thing up too. And by virtue of him, if he's the primary bread winner being successful through those things, he can in turn, leapfrog and benefit. Like what so is itching me benefit her too and whatever that she wants to do. And I remember this one guy was like, yeah, if my wife wanted to do X, y, z, do it.

you know, as long as the family, as long as we, we have our, our, our goals set with the family and set and together, there were times that I get my husband and to pick up the slack on certain things and he still does, you know? But that required a lot of communication. It required compromise, it required a lot of those things because he understood that there was things that I needed too. And so this one particular gentleman, particular that I was talking to, he talked about how like when there are times, like if he's doing certain things for business or whatever, you know, he made need his wife to recognize that, hey, this is important in order for me to achieve this, you know, and she understood just like when she wants to do certain things, she's like, whatever she it is that she wants to do, do it.

But, you know, I I just, I just thought that was interesting listening to people who have a couple of points or who were on that trajectory. you know, they liked the fact that their significant others, their rides or whatever, were educated, you know, they did enjoy that. And a lot of times they meet some of these people in these environments. I know we like to think that a lot of these African men are meeting women in these like, like these bimbos or something. But the fact of the matter is, there's a social thing too associated with, I'm not talking about the ding don athletes, right?

'cause they're silly. But when you have people who have old money or whatever it is, right? They want somebody with a particular status too. Somebody that they can bring around their friends and family. Someone that can hold an intelligent conversation, someone that they can, I don't know, it's snobby, but they understand like, oh, there's a place called e Baja in the moment. It was war. And I'm, I don't know, I just made that off the top of my head. But like, you know what I mean? Like, understand that there's so much that goes into it.

It is really interesting. Anyway, these are just my thoughts. That's pretty much it. Let you know what drawers are. all right.

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