Stanctuary

I’m at the Sanctuary
With a name like that I’m sure to be protected
I head to the green room
Where the other poets await
This room s got two beds
With condoms just in case?

Signs all around
That consent is respected
Imagine what happens 
In these public sex beds

I’m told I’m on 
after Mind Stateless
I see them
As they mouth their words 
In memorized practice

The crowd reminds me of new york city
All I see is smiles from here to eternity

As each poet exposes their soul
The audience upholds their cosmic role

Hootin and hollering’
Cheering snappin
I miss these big cities
Where we baskin in clappin

I hear my name
it’s time to perform
I walk up to mic
And give it up to the host

I hear a song playing
I guess they’ll turn it off
When I start speaking

I start a few lines
And this songs so distracting 
I guess I’m suppose to just keep going
and not say anything?

It must only but me
Maybe this song’s in my head
Maybe I’m crazy

With each line
I’m battling Bowie
I came here to share my poetry
But I guess tonight,
it’s rape karaoke

Sounds forced upon me
I pretend like it’s normal 

Im in the spotlight
Spittin all but safety words
Does anyone want to hear my words?

So off the beat
And yet I’m getting beat up
No one seems to notice
Should I just fuckin give up?

Should I say something?
I’m sure they will fix it eventually

They don’t

With two minutes left
I request another rhyme
All I heard was a NO
So they EVEN took my time

I’m left wondering
Why didn’t I request for someone to lower the music?
Why did everyone else get MORE than 4 minutes?
Why did everyone else get their acapella in silence?
Why did I even ask for permission to continue the violence?
Why didnt I fight for my rights?
Why am I always the nice guy?
Why does my lion run and hide?
Why do I ALWAYS
Put everyone above me 
EVERY
FUCKIN
TIME?

I guess it was just mistake 
my hero’s egos bruised Because I didn’t get my cake
But either way 
I escaped 

Through these bars of my penitentiary 
my friend, the pen, intentionally 
frees the tension

While doing my time,
I learned how performers should be protected
I learned a few ways, how to disrespect’em
I learned how to stare at my insecurity
I learned how to care, for each vulnerability

And most importantly……

I learned the real meaning of sanctuary