In episode 169 of the Sober Vibes podcast, Courtney Andersen chats about overcoming burnout and what has helped her.
Feeling overwhelmed by the clutter of life and the relentless demands of self-improvement? Join Courtney as she shares her personal narrative of battling burnout and finding solace in the simplicity of structure and self-care. Whether it's the physical space around us or our mental load, She learned that decluttering is not just about tidying up—it's about creating an environment where you can breathe freely and rebuild from the inside out.
In episode 169 of the Sober Vibes podcast, Courtney Andersen chats about overcoming burnout and what has helped her.
Feeling overwhelmed by the clutter of life and the relentless demands of self-improvement? Join Courtney as she shares her personal narrative of battling burnout and finding solace in the simplicity of structure and self-care. Whether it's the physical space around us or our mental load, She learned that decluttering is not just about tidying up—it's about creating an environment where you can breathe freely and rebuild from the inside out.
Thank you so much for joining us. Welcome back to the Sober Vibes podcast. It's me, your host, courtney Anderson. You are listening to episode 169. I don't know if you guys are aware of it, but in Michigan there is an exit. It's the mile marker, exit 169 on Big Baker Road. I shit you not. So put that together. Anytime I hear the number 169, it always makes me think of that exit number and you can ask anybody who grew up in the Detroit metro area who knows that They'll fucking giggle, they'll have something to say about it. So today it's me. It's a solo dolo episode I wanted to piggyback off of last week's and if you haven't listened to the season opener, episode 167, go back and again, welcome to season five.
Speaker 1:
So in that episode I really didn't explain how to get out of burnout and I think that is very important to talk about and that's why I want to talk about that with you today. More and more over the last, especially last couple of years, I have seen a lot, a lot of women talk about burnout, a lot of entrepreneurs talking about burnout, and I know it's just not an entrepreneur thing. I just think it's a worldwide thing of just a lot of women burnt out and coming out of the last four years. So I just want to share on ways I came out of it and it really does then become starting a little bit of a healing process within yourself, because it's very easy to fall out of good routines. It's very easy to fall out of good habits, especially when you're taking care of other people and not putting yourself first, and I think that's the one thing out of this I want you to take away or recognize is that you weren't putting yourself, you weren't taking care of you first, and that is what happened to moi. So how did I do this? How did I start coming out of burnout? Well, clearly you guys knew I took a long pause between seasons of the podcast, and another thing I stopped doing I'm just going to talk business-wise and then I'll just kind of go personal. But then what I stopped doing, too, was taking on one-on-one clients, and again, it's just about not being able to hold space for others when you personally don't feel good. And I think that that's actually a good thing to fucking take a pause, because who wants a silver couch? Who's goddamn burnout? I mean, who wants that? For anything? You're paying somebody of a service a therapist, a fucking hairdresser, whatever the service may be like you want them to do a good job. So I knew I wasn't going to be able to do a good job keeping space like that with one-on-one, so I took a step back. So, in business wise, I took a step back from actually doing other podcast interviews and this podcast and my one-on-ones, because, again, let's go to protecting energy, right? So I stopped doing that.
Speaker 1:
The beginning of the year two, I stopped. I've actually longer than this have really I would probably say more of like eight months I've been trying to do this, but really in the beginning of the year I honed down more on this and it was I started to fucking declutter. I started to declutter. Now I do not have, I don't, I'm just setting this stage up. So you get a, a, a virtual or an idea in your head. Okay, I don't live in clutter, right In this sense, where I like to keep.
Speaker 1:
I like to keep like tabletops, I like to keep tabletops clean and all of that. But what happens is there was a couple areas in my house that I was just throwing it into the room, into the closet or in the basement. I was just throwing it into the room, into the closet or in the basement. So my little dictator at this point when I started this process he was at two We've decided like no more, we're a one and done family Great, I was keeping on to the baby stuff just in case we did decided that we were going to have another and so then I started to get rid of that and again, I highly suggest for anybody to this is I make piles of keep, I make piles of donate and I make piles for sale. And I will tell you that I have had a lot of fucking good luck with the Macari app. I will put it in the show notes below and I think that gives you some money if you sign up with Macari through that app.
Speaker 1:
And I didn't know about it, my one girlfriend got me on it because the Facebook fucking marketplace like Jesus with the DMs and then the bots and then people fucking showing up at your house and then last minute deciding not to take it. It's like, oh my God, you guys, I sold these fucking amazing hunter boots and this bitch tried to say when she showed up, these hunter boots I probably spent like 120 bucks, that I was selling for $25. And this woman tried to tell me that they she didn't want to pay more than that because they weren't in good condition. I'm like bitch, do you have eyes? What are you talking about? But that's just like. It's just Facebook marketplace, right? Like I have learned that Facebook marketplace like cool to sell some stuff, but other stuff it's like no, okay, so, anyways.
Speaker 1:
So I started going through my husband and I started going through the basement and getting the baby stuff out. I started to go through his clothes and I am keeping some baby onesies and some shirts Like I eventually want to turn that into like a big blanket for him or just for me to go in and smell with his baby scent. Any mom would probably be like oh yes, or just stuff, like little stuff for him that he can whatever, if he's a grown adult look at and be like I'm glad my mom saved this, or what the fuck was this woman thinking? Anyways, so I have saved some stuff, sold some stuff, donated it, right. So I started to move that out and that was a weight off of my chest.
Speaker 1:
I then started to go through my dresser and I had these dresser. Drawers were like packed to the brim of just shit. I was holding on to where I'm like dude, I have not worn this in 10 years. Like 1001 t-shirts where I'm like these don't even fit. And for me personally, as you guys know, I have shared with you about my and in this last episode I shared with it of my weight gain and and I'm like why am I going to keep this? Why am I going to keep this to be like well, one day I'm going to fit into this. And it really is true of what these declutterers say, like if you haven't worn it in a year, just fucking get rid of it and buy yourself something of new down the road.
Speaker 1:
Okay, I had a coming to Jesus with some of these clothes I was hoarding with and I started the process of donating and getting that and getting rid of that. I also, too, had a shit ton of shoes right and because my feet have grown a size bigger, half a size, half a size bigger since having the little dictator, so I started to get rid of my shoes Again donate, throw away, sell. So I really started that process and I did not do this all at once because, again, the key is to not overwhelm yourself. So I have just like one to two things around my house a month. I have been doing that and that takes some time too, like selling it and taking pictures and all of that jazz. And then I have just moved to random areas in the house the coffee cup selection I'm like I don't need a thousand and one stuff.
Speaker 1:
Anyways, me doing this has, then it's almost like it's been like a 50,000 pound elephant off of my chest, like, honestly, it has just made me feel better. And actually, in the sobriety circle I did a, I did a workshop which if you join, you get access to all of the workshops I've done. I did a workshop about decluttering and and a woman in there was like, oh my God, like did it feel so much better? Because, it is true, you're just the stuff that accumulates in our home. It's just like whether you're using it or not, it just can be, it can feel heavy and especially if you're not using it, it's like why just keep it there?
Speaker 1:
Okay, and again, I don't want you to be like well, my mom gave me this stuff and I want to hold on to it. If you want to hold on to it, hold on to it, please. Do I understand that? There are some stuff. I have some stuff from my mom holding on to Same thing. I have a whole china set for my grandmother. Will I even eat that off, that china set? I don't know, but I'm keeping it because it was from Jerry, so I get it where it's like. That stuff is like this brings me joy. I'm going to keep on to it, but I have to say, energetically, if you are in a sense of burnout, energetically, this just removes stale energy around your house and especially, too, of stepping into where I have been at the past couple of years, of this new identity of motherhood. That is right. I realize I need to then be like okay, do those possessions and stuff that I have match who I am now? So I've done that.
Speaker 1:
I highly, highly, highly recommend you purging, and I will say to this too if you're in the early stages of quitting drinking, it gives you something to do. It honestly does. Put some tunes on and light a candle, make yourself a little mocktail or just drink a Coca-Cola classic or a cup of coffee and have a purging party. Also, too, you can make some money off of it if you decide to go the Facebook route or go the Macari route or there's another app, because my sister-in-law is always like I was at a Poshmark. She has good luck on that one. I have not dabbled into that one yet and you can make some money back on some of these items that you spent money on. So that was one thing that I have been working on. That's really helped me.
Speaker 1:
The other thing that I stopped doing because this has to go along with bringing more stuff into my house I actually stopped buying books for a hot minute and I still haven't. And during the wintertime I started taking my son to the library and having a plane in there and whatnot, and I'm like, oh, I have a fucking library card now why don't I just check books out? You guys, if you have not been to the library in some time, go back. Because it is just like I don't know, it's just a peaceful place. Maybe it's because majority of people are quiet and just sitting and chilling, but it really is just kind of a peaceful place, anyways. So I found some joy should you not in legit checking books out and just reading them and taking them back.
Speaker 1:
I know it sounds so silly, but it's so easy to get so far away from these things that we used to do when we were a kid of a certain generation, like of going and checking out library books, because that's what you did. So since the beginning of the year I stopped buying books and stopped bringing that stuff because I have a whole bookshelf and I know you can donate books and one day I will go through that. But I also like to have my books because I believe it's a nice little education and I go back to some of these books and reread them. But I just don't want to bring in any more books. So I've been checking books out of the library to stop consuming, to stop being a little consuming, little piglet. Okay, will I do that forever? Most likely not, but I have found joy and that has helped in the burnout process.
Speaker 1:
The other thing going to this book now y'all know I love some personal development. I stopped reading personal development books for this year. There's some I have been listening to on Audible because in our sobriety circle we do do a book club for every two months. So I stopped because I felt like for me and after being an author this past year in the self-help thing it started to feel more like a chore and I knew that was with the burnout. So I have, I'm just getting books. I'm just reading people about people's lives.
Speaker 1:
The book right now I'm reading is Kelly Ripa's book and it's actually making me laugh. She's a good writer. I just read Andy Cohen's the Daddy Diaries. I read Demi Moore's book. Her story's crazy. There was another one that was called what was it? I'm Glad my Mother's Dead by. I'm forgetting the girl's name, but that was a good. She was a child star like that was a good one. So I have just found I have found some love in reading again and I am just eating up other people's stories in that sense of just like, all right, you know, I love some celebs and I want to read about them and what's up in their life. Right, hey, good people of the world, as you live your sober life, don't just count the days, make the days count.
Speaker 1:
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Speaker 1:
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Speaker 1:
I want this daily habit to not feel like I'm just checking off a fucking to-do list, right, because again I'm meeting myself with where I'm at now. So less consuming, less buying shit, more reading for enjoyment. I also, too, to help me get back out of the burnout, I started cooking again and actually like preparing meals and I am following more currently, right now, of a keto diet. I'm not like extremely terribly like tracking every macro in that, but I am following a general plan that has me cooking again and that feels good to be in the kitchen creating something. I will never be a person who's like a thousand percent of like. I love to cook, I love to bake, I don't love to cook, but this has getting back in the kitchen and like preparing stuff for myself on a daily basis has just had me more of a deeper level of appreciation again for food.
Speaker 1:
I will have to talk about this in a separate episode, especially for the girls, for the women who have been on the yo-yo diet train for years, because it's exhausting and it gets you to a point where you just get like so burnt out and like an ick feeling of food and if you can relate to this, please send me a DM and let me know. But I just this is just a conversation again for another episode, because you just get to a point where you're just like you get turned off, you get completely turned off by it, and then it's just in the thing with eating every day. It's like you've got to eat to live Anyways. So I got back in the kitchen and I learned new by following this new eating that I am following, and it's like I'm learning a new skill again where I'm and it doesn't feel so overwhelming to get into a kitchen and cooking a fucking meal. I have prioritized my sleep again. I prioritize my sleep again to help me and even to allowed myself in the process of when feeling tired or needing to nap, when the little dictator naps, where I'm not beating myself up about it and be like I need to be doing this, I need to be doing that. It's like no, just fucking nap if you need to. Okay, sleep if you need to, and I've allowed myself that.
Speaker 1:
Another thing also, too, is I have and my therapist said this to me a little bit ago where she was like you're finally creating systems for yourself to fit with your motherhood role, and I was like yes, you are right, julia, I am doing that. And it took her to say it for me to realize what I was doing, because my whole setup is I was operating a lot with the little dictator like I didn't have a child. I know that's really weird, but like not setting myself up for success. I have to say that Like I was not setting myself up for success in the way that I should have been doing with a kid, and that's just like easy little systems of like continuously making sure, like running the dishwasher at night, cause I, I guys, when you have a child I have to say this when you have a kid, all of a sudden, all you're doing is fucking washing dishes. Like it's insane, insane.
Speaker 1:
So now, for the most part, I run the dishwasher like I don't know every other night, right, and then the morning time I don't know every other night, right, and then in the morning time like unload them, just to get that unloaded, and then have the dishwasher like where I then don't feel like I'm, like dishes are piling up in the sink and it's like little stuff like this where it has helped me so much function, or being like, okay, sunday I do laundry, now having the dictator, and then feeling like I'm not, like then feeling overwhelmed, where I feel like I have to do laundry every day. So it's really simply just I just took my week and little habits and shifted them. Now that has helped me huge, huge, huge, huge. Because as a mom now and as first, as a human being. And then you add the mom factor on top of it. I was getting very overwhelmed by just like his toys everywhere.
Speaker 1:
And that is another thing. I will tell you what these kids do. They will just come up to the counter. Anything that's on the counter, any of them will just knock it off, throw it across the room. All of a sudden, all of your fucking Tupperware it's all over the floor. What just happened? You completely lose all control. You lose all control and by the end of the day, your house looks like it. It just you're like what happened.
Speaker 1:
And again, I spent 38 years of just moi and I spent a good. Let's see, when did I move out from my parents' house? 18, 19 years old, so I liked my stuff in order, right, and when you have a kid, that all goes out the window. Plus, too, and in my state of burnout of trying to keep forcing on how I lived pre-dictator, I had to let that go. So that's what I'm saying I had to start living like I had a little dictator, because that is my reality and that's where I want to just a little like.
Speaker 1:
If you need to implement this in your life of especially, too, I know, once you quit drinking, it's very easy to keep comparing yourself to back then. It's like that's not who you are anymore and even to, and in just the series of what's happened in the past couple of years, or if there's been a life change, you're not the person who you were before the life changed. So, like, you have to catch up with who you are today and find those systems that are going to help you with that person you are today, not the person you were fucking 10 years ago. Right, like, meet yourself with where you're at today and fix that, because that's what I have learned a lot and it's the same thing of like, okay, I know I need to get up in the morning time and be able to read and have a little P and Q and get ready and get ready for the day, because I no longer want to sit there and fight with a two and a half year old about stopping to taking my makeup brushes as I'm trying to put my makeup on. Like, honestly, because this is just like a cortisol spike and because it was all fine and dandy when he was eight months old and I could put him in his little chair and I could just sit there and rock him and he'd be playing with a little stuffy good. But now it's like and that's where it's funny about motherhood and what I'm learning it's like these stages you have to keep adapting and changing to these different stages. So I wasn't adapting to that. So, yes, so I have to get up and make sure that I'm ready before him and I have to do these things each day to keep me feeling good. And then, of course, I then added on of taking care back, care of myself.
Speaker 1:
Going to the gym, I really got back into doing that elliptical. You guys, that elliptical Fuck, if you haven't been on one in quite some time, go get on one and then be like, tell me how you feel about 15 minutes after, because you're just like I, just I love that machine. So I got back into the gym, going to the gym, going on the elliptical, just using the joining. I joined a gym because I didn't want my back to flare up like it did last year. I'm like I'm not doing that again. So I was using the treadmill and the elliptical at the gym and, honestly, I didn't even. I haven't even touched weights yet. I'm starting to incorporate weights again this month because when I was with Beachbody and doing Beachbody coaching, like I loved working out, but then it just started to feel like a chore for me and then even to when I stopped, I still continued to work out, but it wasn't. It just wasn't enjoyable. So, for me, walks are enjoyable. That elliptical machine was enjoyable.
Speaker 1:
Yes, I know you need to do weights and incorporate that, like I said, I'm going to, but I wanted to get some basics down and just start doing things that I enjoyed more and not like I needed to do this where I felt like I had to. And I think that's the most important thing that I have learned of helping me overcome burnout is start doing things that make you fucking feel good and that you enjoy, and really just look at your schedule, your life different, and meet yourself at with where you are and not where you once were and I think that's very helpful piece of advice, because that's the biggest thing that I learned in this last couple months and just saying no to things that you just don't give a shit about. Honestly, where it's just like no, I'm good, or knowing when you feel like something, start getting a little bit overwhelmed to know yourself enough to be like, okay, instead of spiraling. I'm just going to go, take a couple breaths and or take a shower and know that I only can do a couple things today to make myself feel good. First, putting yourself first is what I'm trying to say of before slipping out of that, before slipping and spiraling, just always to just put yourself first and take a pause and keep doing the things that make you feel good so you don't get back into a burnout. I also, too, decreased my social media time. That was very, very helpful. I took kind of a pause, too, with engagement, and that has helped too. And again, this is just boundaries, right, like this is just boundaries of what I had to put in place to make myself feel better. So, if you have suffered with burnout, I hope one of these things can help you. And, like I said that, cleaning out the purging I can't even tell you that purging was like the number one thing for me and it really helped a lot and finding organization systems that work for me and that's what you got to find what works for you, right, because what works for me might not work for you, and so on and so on, and I just want to empower you to find systems that work for you. You so rest, rest, declutter, start doing things that bring you joy. Maybe stop with the personal development even too.
Speaker 1:
I've said this a lot on the show and I've said it in my book. I've said it a lot If you feel like you're getting to a place of recovery, burnout, sobriety, burnout stop listening to all the podcasts. Even if you got to press a pause on me right now, stop, stop, just stop. Stop listening to all the podcasts. I'm probably going to get a lot for this, but I'm going to say it. If you feel like going to a meeting every day is no longer enjoyable for you and it's more than a chore, then cut those meetings back to a couple days a week, because I don't want you to get to the point where you just say fuck it and then end up relapsing and drinking. So I hope that comes out more. I'm not saying don't go to meetings, but just dial it back a little bit. Stop reading all the books, stop listening to all the podcasts.
Speaker 1:
The answer of what you're looking for, of how do I stop drinking, you choose not to drink today, tomorrow, so on and so on, but you just worry about today, okay, and then tomorrow you do the same that you did today. That's why, too, in this season, I want to bring a lot more topics than just about sobriety and because I want this, because, no matter what, it is life at the end of the day. So I just want to bring different topics into this podcast that are going to enrich and enhance your life going forward. So if you have any questions, as always, reach out to me on the gram at Sober Vibes. Make sure. If you haven't yet, please rate, review and subscribe.
Speaker 1:
Slash, follow the show. Know that this show now is on YouTube only in audio format. So it's over on YouTube. Make sure you subscribe to on that channel. And all of my free resources are in the show notes below. Coaching you can apply in the show notes below and to the Sobriety Circle, and that is the group coaching community. Great women in there. There's meetings twice a week and it's on a separate app. Workshops you have access to right away. It is $35 a month. Use code 2024 to get $10 off your first month. Okay, all right, thanks for listening and keep on trucking out there. You.
