Two Mindset Shifts for an Alcohol-Free August

Episode 187:Two Mindset Shifts for an Alcohol-Free August

In episode 187 of the Sober Vibes podcast, Courtney Andersen coaches you through two powerful mindset shifts to help you stay alcohol-free in August. She shares how mindset and how you speak are everything and how it's a great tool to use in your sobriety journey when getting alcohol in your first few years of recovery. 

In this episode, you will learn:

• Two mindset shifts
• Using empowering language in your journey
• Focusing on the positive benefits of not drinking alcohol 

Thank you for listening.

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Chapters

• 2:15 Mindset Hacks for Sober Living
• 17:17 Breaking Free From the Drinking Cycle

Transcript

Speaker 1: 2:15

Hey, welcome to the Sober Vibes podcast. I am your host, courtney Anderson. You are listening to episode 187. And in today's episode I am going to give you two mindset hacks to help you stay alcohol-free in August, because my theme for the summer and on this podcast was really with the solo coaching episodes was to really keep pushing you through another day and keep reminding yourself and conditioning in your brain why you want to live a life without alcohol, because I know summer is really difficult for a lot of people to stay through. But I will tell you, this August is one that I see a lot of people and know a lot of people who quit drinking because they lost their goddamn minds in August. I was one of them August 18th. We're coming up on 12 years and I can still remember the day of waking up to how all that went down, which I'll explain later in my 12-year anniversary podcast that I do. So I want to give these hacks to you and I really hope they help. As always, send me a DM and let me know if these solo episodes or text the show which you can find that information in the show notes below you can find all the information, my resources when I'm coaching this variety circle my book all of that down in the show notes below and send a text to the show and let me know if you've been enjoying these summer coaching episodes where it's just moi. If you're new here, welcome. Coaching episodes where it's just moi. If you're new here, welcome. There's 186 episodes you need to listen to if you have not listened to those yet. Lots of jokes around here, some seriousness, lots of great guests sharing their stories. Let's get down to business.

Speaker 1: 4:03

These are the two mindset hacks that I really think are very helpful for you to keep going in your journey, wherever you're at, because you could be at 10 years right now and you could be shaking in your boots and that happens. So you always got to keep in mind, you got to stay humbled in this journey. I really, truly believe that. I really truly believe that you have to stay humbled and realize that you might not got it like that. Leave that. You have to stay humbled and realize that you might not got it like that, and that is something that I have always tried to say myself of just like remembering that life events can take you out, as in drinking, and you don't know what's to come. You don't know what's going to happen tomorrow. So just like keep doing these practices, no matter where you are, and understanding that. And that is something too I've learned from a couple quote unquote old timers.

Speaker 1: 4:53

Okay, and especially this one, a little sparky spark plug that he taught me, which I need to call him, by the way, which he taught me and he has about. I think he was like 20 plus years. He had at one point, I think seven, and then went out and then reeled it back in, but that was something that he always did. I mean, he still would from time to time go to an AA meeting and check in and also to give back to people who were in earlier sobriety. But I learned that from him and that was always to stay humbled through this process and remember how it can take you out so quickly. So I appreciate that. I hope this helps you today.

Speaker 1: 5:42

So, number one, okay, and again, I'm a huge fan of mindset tricks and hacks. I should say not tricks, but mindset hacks really for life. And how we talk to ourselves really does matter and it is important. And again, to get into that woo, in this process you do have to build yourself back up. That's why I think the practice of words and language is so powerful in these hacks. So, number one embrace the power of I don't instead of I can't, right, and this is the thing too I have said to people I work with.

Speaker 1: 6:24

When I'm on clients in my sobriety circle, I always drop out affirmations. I try to do an affirmation like five to six times a week in there and instead of saying, when you tell yourself you can't drink, it might feel like you're denying or restricting yourself. Right, and that is, I believe, where a lot of people get hung up. I know for sure in the beginning of mine I was like, oh my God, especially those first couple months, it is so fucking overwhelming to be like I will never have a drink again. That is like it's beyond, because you've got to remember how much alcohol played a role in your life and that was your best friend for many, many, many, many, many years. So that's why you need to give sobriety many, many, many, many, many, many, many chances. And you need to give sobriety many, many, many, many, many, many, many chances. And you have to understand that it's a process and that, fuck, you're feeling tired after two months. Well, it's like, goddamn, you were putting poison into your body for years and years and years on a daily basis for some of us, and then sometimes on a weekly basis, but it was very present in our life and we put it into our body almost every day. So you need to give yourself a chance. So, again, when you tell yourself you can't drink, it's going to feel like you're restricting. But once you shift that around to say I don't drink, doesn't that feel and sound more powerful or empowering for you? And that's the point of Sober Vibes is always to empower you in your sober journey to keep going right, and you guys have.

Speaker 1: 7:57

For people who've been here from the beginning, I understand the power of saying I'm an alcoholic, but after a certain point it's like but, I'm not living in that space anymore, and that's something too that I it's like even with working with one-on-one clients. When they're like all right, I'm only at 30 days, it's like no, you're doing the goddamn thing right. Like you are doing this. You've been showing up for 30 days and this is what you are being. So the power of words and how you reframe things really does matter. So, and when you're choosing to say I don't drink, you're not missing out. You're choosing something better for yourself, right? So I want that simple change in language. It helps to reframe your mindset from one deformation to again to empowerment.

Speaker 1: 8:45

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Speaker 1: 9:11

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Speaker 1: 10:25

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Speaker 1: 11:37

I have been using Exact Nature, for I think at this point, a year and a half, maybe almost two years, for a long time. I use it every day and it has by far helped me with my mood. Again, exactnaturecom, enjoy. Number two focus on the benefits of not drinking and not the sacrifice or the deprivation right, and not that FOMO. So what are the benefits of you not drinking alcohol? Number one let's just go with the easiest. You're no longer going to have hangovers that last you a couple days, or that you have a hangover where then you're going to start drinking at five o'clock to make you feel better. You're no longer going to have that anxiety and I'm talking about the drinking anxiety, okay, because what we all have to realize is that drinking alcohol is only going to heighten our anxiety and depression more. It makes it worse. Yes, it calms it down for a very brief period of time, but then it just fucking makes it worse.

Speaker 1: 12:45

I used to drink myself into panic attacks. I even took myself into a walk-in clinic and thought I was having a heart attack. I made these medical professionals strap me up to a machine to make sure. What was it? It was a panic attack, and that is what that hot doctor told me that day after I went in after a three-day bender of drinking and cocaine, and that is where then my anxiety hangovers then turned into like these panic attacks and it shifted at 25 years old. I don't know what the fuck happened at 25, but this then it was like panic attacks and then from then on it was like my anxiety was so crippling where I thought I was going to die after a night of drinking and I and it was still to that point even without the cocaine involved. It was crazy. So that's going to be a huge benefit. You're no longer going to face is that type of anxiety. Yes, then you're going to have a huge benefit. You're no longer going to face that type of anxiety. Yes, then you're going to have to learn to live with your anxiety.

Speaker 1: 13:49

I believe it's like 30 million people have an anxiety disorder and I have to say this with the person who has lived with anxiety and understood it more after I quit drinking and I had to go through the process of fucking sitting there and like almost jumping out of my skin, of being like what the fuck is this, you know? Of learning practices to help it, and then, in that period of time of learning, you start to learn how to live with anxiety and just accept it. That is why I'm a huge fan of understanding for women, especially where your cycle is. And when I was trying to conceive for so many years, I had to track my cycles right. So then I understood like, oh, towards my period, I have fucking raging anxiety. So you just learn to live with your anxiety. So you just learn to live with your anxiety.

Speaker 1: 14:45

And for people who take medication, you figure out what medication is going to help you. If people do alternative to medication, then you figure out what's going to help you, right? Triggers all of that Like are you now a person who gets overstimulated or where you have to eat every couple hours? I am the person who needs to eat a little bit of a snack every couple hours because once my blood sugar drops, then it's like that anxiety-induced feeling comes on and you're like what the fuck? What is this? And it's like bitch, you just need to eat a banana, have an apple, you'll be fine. And it has been the case of then eating and I'm like all right, I feel good, right has been the case of them eating and I'm like all right, I feel good, right. So focus on that benefit. You're not going to have that ridiculous hangover anxiety more.

Speaker 1: 15:33

Guess what then will happen when you stop drinking and you focus on the benefits. You stop drinking and within a time period, within time, that shame and guilt starts to lessen and lessen and lessen. All right, I thought the dictator was up for one quick minute. His nap time schedule has changed, so it starts to the shame and guilt start to lessen and you don't feel that anymore. Right, let's talk about 30 to 60 to 90 days out. You start noticing your skin looks better, that people are now being like you look good. What's your secret? And you're going to look at them and dead in the eye and be like bitch, I don't drink anymore. I'm telling you, yes, it's not going to cure all of your life's problems. You still have a lot of stuff to figure out after you quit drinking. But you've got to look for these little, little little benefits and focus on that instead of what you feel like you're missing out on and you're not missing out on much when you drink alcohol.

Speaker 1: 16:43

If you are new here, I have said this a lot of times. Okay, I feel like I should stop referring back to things that I have said and stop saying that. But I just can remember a lot of the stuff that I've said on the show and there's been we'll be at almost 190 episodes here. That's a lot of talking. That's why I believe it breaks. Sorry, I'm going off on the left, but I was a sober bartender. I experienced bartending. I'm just going to tell you this. I've experienced bartending In my active addiction. I have experienced bartending sober.

Speaker 1: 17:17

And I will tell you this it's the same goddamn thing.

Speaker 1: 17:24

You are not missing out on anything. It is the same conversations people have. It is the same music they play on the internet jukebox. It is the same time that they walk into those doors. You are not missing out on anything. I understand you feel like it's the connection. I was once there too. I get it. But you can start cultivating a new connection with your friends, the ones who are going to be worth having around to support you in your journey. Okay, it's just. It's the same old song and dance of people going out and drinking on the weekends and then guess what. Out and drinking on the weekends and then guess what. They wake up the next morning feeling like dog dick and having to then have a little bit of hair of the dog, or going to their kid's soccer game and sitting there and fucking, sweating and having anxiety and being hung over, and then future trip to oh my God, I cannot wait till five until I can have a beer. It's not a place to live to always be looking for your next drink.

Speaker 1: 18:30

Here's another one of focus on the benefits. Focus on the freedom you are about to experience of not being tied down to a substance where it's a constant 24-hour fucking cycle minus the sleep. But you don't really get any good sleep because you have been drinking and it's the thoughts and then you get into this thing of when you're trying to quit drinking of. Like God, now I'm thinking about quitting drinking more than I'm thinking about drinking when I'm drinking. I just want to quit drinking and not live in this anymore. So that is one of the number one benefits is breaking free of that cycle of being tied so emotionally to a substance that all it delivers is like one hour of joy. That's all it delivers. The fallout is not worth that one hour you experience. You can relax in other ways, you can connect with people in other ways and you can all do this without booze.

Speaker 1: 19:34

I promise you this. I promise you and I'm speaking from experience. I truly am speaking from experience. So I want you to do that. I want you to say I don't, instead of I can't, embrace that power, and then let's start focusing on the benefits of not drinking instead of the sacrifice or the things that you're missing out on. Okay is a process and it takes some time. So if you don't get this today, it's okay. Keep trying. Like anything is a practice, just keep trying and keep taking on another day without alcohol. All right, have a wonderful, wonderful August, and I hope you do that all without alcohol, as always. Keep on trucking and kick some ass out there, thank you.