Sober Vibes Podcast
Courtney Andersen hosts the Sober Vibes podcat. A woman who decided to end her decade long love affair with alcohol in 2012 at 29 years old. She chose to live openly as a recovering alcoholic with honesty and humor while figuring it out one day at a time.This space and community will bring you weekly episodes of Courtney's experience and help as well as interviews from incredible souls who are living a life without drugs and alcohol. Courtney's sister Kimberly Elledge who also is a recovering alcoholic and addict will join her in open conversations. The sisters will bring you their insights on this disease, family dynamics, and how they have healed — a show within a show.This podcast is here to inspire, empower, uplift, and bring you some laughter along the way in your journey.
Sober Vibes Podcast
Tips and Strategies for a Successful Sober September
Episode 191: Tips and Strategies for a Successful Sober September
In episode 191 of the Sober Vibes podcast, Courtney Andersen discusses and coaches you through tips and strategies for a successful Sober September. These tips will also help you continue on your alcohol-free journey.
What you will learn in this episode:
- Tips for a Sober September
- Socializing without alcohol
- Preparing your space at home
- How September is a great month to reset and quit drinking alcohol
Thank you for listening.
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Hey, welcome to the Sober Vibes podcast. I am your host, courtney Anderson. You are listening to episode 191. You guys, it's September and in this episode I'm going to give you a couple tips for a successful sober September, or if you are still on your alcohol-free sober journey. These are just tips, too, that you can think of utilize if you need to, or share with somebody else. If you know somebody who's in the early stages or trying to quit drinking, share this podcast with somebody that you know who might need to listen. Share this podcast with somebody that you know who might need to listen.
Speaker 1:I just want to take the time to say that today the Dictator goes to preschool. I'm recording this a couple days early, but you will get this the day the Dictator is off in preschool and in preschool and I am feeling fine. I'm very happy for him. If you listened to me and my sister's last episode, we kind of shared about this, kind of talked about it, but, like I'm very excited for him to go out in the world and learn from other people and to make a couple friends of his age group, right and to, because his little pals around my neighborhood are. They're older kids and some of those big kids are dicks. Anyways, that's a story for another day.
Speaker 1:That's the hardest part about this, I think, for I mean I can't speak for other parents, but if anybody is mean to my kid, that one's going to hurt. You know what I mean. Like, what do you do? Because I will want to go dropkick a three-year-old if they're mean to my child. I'm kidding, please don't take me serious, but that's my inner, my inner beings will want to do that. I would never. But you know what I mean. I mean nobody wants you to be mean for your kids. Like motherhood, parenthood, it's different in a good way. But then too, as these little guys get older, he just turned three. Like I've been good year one, year two, but him turning three, I've been in my feelings for the past couple of days and he just, he's just the best.
Speaker 1:So he's going off to preschool and you know what that means that I am back. I am back to continuing forward with the things that I want to, not only do for myself personally, but what I want to do with Sober Vibes. So when I say what that means is that I am going to have two fucking free days to myself for like six hours. I don't even know what I'm going to do with myself. I will tell you, though, the day he is back in preschool, the first day, I will probably disassociate for a little bit, take a nap, stare at a wall, because as a parent, you just don't know what to do with yourself, especially if you've been the stay-at-home parent. And if you want to drop into my DMs and tell me any words of wisdom, please do on now what you do with yourself, because even when he's gone with his dad, when they go somewhere, it's weird when the house is quiet. So this is just a good transition. But I'm very excited for him. I'm very excited for myself to get two days where I do not have to focus on a nap time hustle, because that is how I've been operating for the last three years of nap time hustle, of continuing with the podcast, writing a fucking book, continuing coaching, nap time hustle slash when my husband gets home from work. So I'm just excited not to operate in that, in that should I dare say fight or flight mode, to try to get the things that I want to get done, and so I'm jazzed on that. So that's, on a personal level, of what is going on with my life and I'm excited that for everybody who has stuck around in these past couple years as I, there's some episodes of the show I'm really proud of and then a couple where I'm like that was rushed right Because of the season of life that I was in. So but I still will say that that book is good, of how I wrote that. So if you haven't checked out my book yet, please do.
Speaker 1:Sober Vibes A Guide to Thriving Without your First Three Months Without Alcohol. The link is in the show notes below. So let's get into what this episode is about today, and that is tips for a successful September without alcohol. Sober September. I'm not trying to come up with like the Sober September, sober October. You guys know how I feel about that. I just want you to keep going forward and if you're new, as in you're discovering your process, your journey right now, or if you've had a bunch of attempts, like so many of us do, until we finally say, okay, it's done, and those many attempts then go into a continued sober streak, okay, because this really does look different for so many fucking people. And do not get it twisted. A lot of people who enter this like don't think that people enter this and then they just get it. It's not. The numbers are very high up of people who enter in the space of sobriety will end up relapsing, and it happens and slips, and all you have to do is keep learning from that and keep remembering. It's just added awareness into your journey. So this is.
Speaker 1:I've always said that summer is a great time to get sober because you can utilize it, and this is same thing for the start of September. Yes, we are still in summer, and I will ride out the summer season. I will not put any Halloween decorations up, I will not put any autumn leave BS up in my house, and, if you do, no judgment, but because I live in the pits of hell in the wintertime, and that is in the great state of Michigan, I ride the seasons out as long as possible. However, september, though, is right, like some people are like, oh, summer's over on Labor Day, weekend or Labor Day, and so I will ride this out until October, until the fall comes. And what's that's in like the end of when is fall? Is it september? Hey, oh, first day of autumn is september 22nd. Okay, so I will ride this out, but on september 22nd I will be putting out my holiday decor which, by the way, it's the dictator's favorite holiday like this kid loves fucking halloween and skeleton guys and like creepy shit.
Speaker 1:So, but going into what I'm trying to tell you is, september is another perfect time to quit drinking Because if you notice something and I have noticed a lot as I've gotten older, to the age of 41, you and I have to say, with being sober and the years that I tried to conceive, you get more in tuned with your body. Right, because you, you can. You're not fucking hung over all the time, so like if something's wrong, you could be like this doesn't feel right, right, same thing, too, with this is going to get a little woo woo, but you can start, as the seasons start changing, like you really do embrace into those seasons, like wintertime, I enjoy, I just want to hibernate, right, but that is the natural rhythm of our bodies. So, for September and it being a good month to quit drinking, it's because it feels like a natural reset, right With fall, with the change of seasons. So, with summer winding down and fall just around the corner, it's an excellent opportunity to establish healthier routines, especially, too, of going back to school, and maybe, too. That's why quote unquote sober October is where people really like to dive into that after a month of getting back into a routine, with summer now having a kid like I can see it. I see it and but right now. I would suggest starting now and continue to go forward in your journey. If you're already sober, but if you're trying to quit drinking, this is the time. And there's other things you can drink during football season. Trust me, there's other things you can do besides drink alcohol with your favorite pastime or favorite sporting event. Yes, you can do trick-or-treating without alcohol with your kids, and it's actually going to be a lot more enjoyable experience to do trick-or-treating without booze, because this is actually a holiday for the children and not for ourselves. Let's dive in, all right.
Speaker 1:So here's three tips for success, and I am reading these off of my notes. If you're not on my email list, I highly suggest because I actually sent this in an email this week and I knew I was going to turn this into a podcast episode as well to elaborate on it, because that's what I feel like. I'm a person who likes to elaborate on things. I don't know if that's good or bad, but sometimes the written word can be taken out of context. So this is why I like to elaborate. But if you are not on my email list, please get on it. I will drop a link below for that as well, too, in the show notes.
Speaker 1:So three tips for success to quit drinking alcohol and continue on your sober journey. Number one prepare your environment right. Set yourself up for success by removing alcohol from your home or keeping out of sight. Now listen, I know you're going to say, well, my husband drinks, or whatever. You got somebody in the house that drinks, you can ask them to hide it on you. I know that sounds dramatic, but that is the case. Like, put it as I just said, keep it out of sight, right. Stock up on alternatives. I'm not telling you to stock up on all the NA beers and alcohol alternatives to that. Stock up on flavored waters. Tea, right. Like Coca-Cola. Have iced tea. Have something for yourself. Yes, if you want to stock up on NA beers and if that helps you and mocktails helps you, have fun with that, and if it triggers no problem, then don't do this. This is all about discovering the road for yourself and what works best for you.
Speaker 1:I get asked that question all the time it's like what do you think of NA beverages? If that doesn't trigger you, then continue to drink it, but if it does trigger you, then don't drink it. Keep something in there that you like to drink. That first year that first year because I still kept some wine glasses, because I still believed in and I still do drinking out of a pretty glass. Right, the glasses don't trigger me. I can't speak for everybody. But that first year because I got sober August 18th, going into the holiday season. It was like ginger ale, cranberry juice, and this was in 2012. So there were not a lot of NA alternatives At that time.
Speaker 1:I believed out that free wine and fucking no duels. So I saw that I was like, oh okay, I'll drink this and it actually was good. Put some ice in it and it was cute and I felt festive, but I empowered myself to do that. I want you to do the same thing. Be like well, I don't have anything to drink. There's like a thousand beverages that you can choose from at the supermarket. Like, go, have fun. I'm encouraging you to have fun with this because, even though this doesn't seem like a really fun time for you early in sobriety, the more empowerment, I can get under you and to make this like I'm. Yes, this is going to be hard, but this shit is not doom and gloom, so I'm going to take the bull by the horns and set myself up for success, and this is what this is about. Okay, and having other options available it will make it easier for you to say no to alcohol it really will and you being prepared where, yes, there be a, you will trigger, and so it might be very easy actually for you to grab a fucking Diet Coke and slam that shit. Maybe slam the can on your forehead I'm kidding, but like slamming a Diet Coke will help you during that time when you want to sit there and drink wine while you're cooking dinner. Okay, so Diet Coke might become your best friend.
Speaker 1:If the world ends, I will go down smoking Parliament Lights and probably chugging Diet Coke out of a two liter. Okay, that is my confession. I've said it before with the cigs, but that is how much I used to love Diet Coke. And I actually did not get into coffee really until like a couple of years, and I think it was like my first year experiments with with some coffee, but like second year I started getting into it when I quit drinking. I fucking loved Diet Coke. Like I would drink a Diet Coke in the morning time and probably have a couple a day. So, and to kick that Diet Coke habit was hard. It truly is. And if there is another Diet Coke drinker out there our ex Diet Coke drinker you know what it's like to have that Diet Coke addiction. It wasn't even a bad addiction, but you know what I mean. I would crave a diet coke. So have a beverage stocked for you and just prepare your environment.
Speaker 1:Ask whoever you live with if there's alcohol in the house. Like, hey, maybe can you put this in the garage. If you don't live with anybody, you do not need to keep booze in your house. I don't wanna hear it like, well, I should save this for somebody else, right? Like no, just get rid of it, just give that gift to somebody currently, right now. For myself, I gave all that to my sister-in-law at the time. I'm just like, here you go to her and her boyfriend. And then I dumped the rest Like who needs a half a fifth of Jameson after I had been swigging out of it secretly. That's what I used to do. Matt would go to bed and I wasn't drunk enough and I would sit there and swig out of the bottle to try to induce a blackout. We've all been there. You say you've never drinking again and then you drink. But would you still drink if those closest to you knew you need something to make you pause before taking that first sip?
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Speaker 1:I have been using Exact Nature for, I think at this point, a year and a half, maybe almost two years, for a long time. I use it every day and it has by far helped me with my mood. Again, exactnaturecom, enjoy All right. Number two track your progress. Use a journal or habit tracking app to log each day so you can stay sober. Okay, so there's plenty of sobriety apps out there where you can track it. If you are a tracker listen, even journaling just writing it down like oh, it's over today, right, like little tally marks. If you are not a day counter, that is okay.
Speaker 1:I still would suggest trying to track it somehow. Right, because even if you do not get through the whole month of September alcohol-free, I want you to go back and look at like oh, wow, because this is how, like human psychology, we're weird, like we are programmed to fucking continuously look at all of our failures of I drank September 15th. Right, like I drank, okay. So then you look at your failure instead of like oh, my God, you know what. I actually didn't drink for 29 days. Okay, I only drink one day out of the whole entire month, and the month before I drink all of 31 days. Right, like, so that's where you have to just keep record of this and keep tabs of. Like. Okay, because for some people, you got to baby step it right. You got to cut down your drinking until you eventually stop. So it looks different for everybody.
Speaker 1:I still want you to track your progress I really truly do and watching your streak grow it's going to boost your confidence and motivate you. And even that suggestion I just said of looking at all the days that you didn't drink right, and that should help you boost your confidence, because maybe you drank once in September, maybe you don't drink at all in October, maybe you drink once in November, maybe you drink twice in December. Then I want you to look back to okay, I started this process in September and I've only drank four to five times in a period of four months. That's huge. And then it's like all right, we're going to get in January. My intention is to make it as many days alcohol free as possible. You got to take the pressure off of yourself Again. I wish I had some son of a bitch on a podcast telling me this back in 2012, because even though I have not had a sip of alcohol in 12 years, it would have just helped me mentally be like okay, phew, right. I just like kind of take the edge off, because it's not, we're not going for perfection here, it's just progress each day.
Speaker 1:Number three I want you to plan some social activities. Social events can be challenging, I get it. If you're used to drinking in those settings, that's the hardest for so many people, it's social settings. And then also, how to tell people you're going to quit drinking, or you're quitting drinking or you don't drink anymore. So again, empower yourself with your girlfriends, with your real pals, with your dudes. Empower yourself to now suggest alcohol-free activities. Still, great weather out. Let's actually go for a walk. You can go visit a museum. You can ask if somebody wants to come over and like, hey, you want to do a movie night. You can ask somebody to go get a fucking cup of coffee with you. The sky is the limit of things that you can do without alcohol. You just have to step back and say you know what I have to get out of what I was so used to doing myself right, and start changing the narrative for myself as well of I can actually ask somebody and use my words to go see if they want to do something out, because I guarantee you, you probably have a gal pal out there who wants to do something else besides drink alcohol, right like.
Speaker 1:Nobody wants to constantly feel like shit and everybody is different of how they process alcohol, right? Matthew Paul, my husband, that man, he would drink two beers before we quit drinking. He would drink two beers and like be hung over a fuck the next day like, where he's just like. I just don't feel good and as we age too, that happens to a lot more people where they're like I can't handle. I can't process alcohol like I once was able to and hey, that is okay. So I guarantee you you have a friend who's fucking dying inside too of just like I don't want to keep drinking. I'm fucking dying inside too, of just like I don't. I don't want to keep drinking like or having a moment where they are just like I. Yeah, I want to do more mindful activities. If I'm going to leave my house, if I'm going to leave my kids, if I'm going to take some time to go do something, it's not. I don't want to feel like where I feel like shit the next day, right Like, where I'm going to go do something and then I'm going to have to deal with 24 hours of what happens after you drink a night of drinking.
Speaker 1:Okay, so if you find yourself in a social gathering where alcohol is present, have a plan in place, like bringing your own non-alcoholic drinks or practicing a polite way to decline offers to alcohol. I've done this with a lot of one-on-one clients. I've said it in my book too. Before you go out, practice with yourself. I know it seems silly, but at least by practicing, when the situation comes up if it ever does come up then you're not sitting there stuttering over your words or you're not like a deer caught in the headlights where you're like oh my God, what the fuck do I say Right, like you have a plan. You know what the steps you're going to take Again for social setting too 60 minute rule Go for an hour, hang out and then be like all right, I got to go home.
Speaker 1:You don't need to get into a story of like a big elaborate, you can just be like I have an early morning tomorrow, that is it. That's all you got to say to people, because when they poke and poke and poke like, oh, please stay, please stay. It really is something about they want you there and it's more of a them problem than a you problem and it's nothing to take personally, right, but it's time for you to exit stage left because you're feeling the anxiety build up and you don't want to take this. This isn't a moment, it won't even be. How do I say this correctly? You don't want to stay past your time, where then you end up slipping and then the next day you're like was that even fucking worth it? Like I should have just gone home Not saying that any slips are worth it, but you know what I mean Like just being at somebody's house and everybody's drinking around a bonfire, like was that really worth it to drink there when all you had to do was leave 20 minutes prior? So that is where, if you haven't listened to the episode yet with Sweet Travis about intuition it was a couple episodes ago listen to it and listen to your gut. It's the same thing Even with planning social activities. If you're not feeling it that day, don't go out, just stay in and that's okay.
Speaker 1:So I hope these tips help you and you get the most out of your alcohol-free, sober September and keep on trucking in your journey. Remember you're not alone in this. They're in the same journey as you, and getting around a support network, if you don't have it, is key and really tuning in and tapping into that. I cannot say that enough. So, because you will have people cheer you on, especially if you don't have people around you in your inner circle maybe. Perhaps that are cheering for you to live an alcohol-free life and especially, to just find yourself some type of support where you're able to fucking verbal diarrhea about this, which is a-okay, but to a group of people who understand. That's why that's really hard.
Speaker 1:When you start trying to talk to a partner about quitting drinking or the road that you're on, or a friend, when a person doesn't have an issue with alcohol, I'm not going to say it falls on deaf ears, but they don't get it. They don't get it and that's okay that they don't get it. I mean, how should somebody get it if they haven't had that experience in life? So find yourself people who get it, and yeah, but empower yourself with these three steps prepare your environment, track your progress and plan social activities that you know, mindful social activities. Like I said, ask somebody to go on a therapy walk with you. Maybe they need the therapy walk more than you do that day. Or like, hey, you want to go get a pedicure? Like, let's go clean up our hooves and sit there in a chair with the massage on and disassociate. I don't know, do you have any real Housewives, fans, friends who want to come over and watch that with you, like you can make it fun. So empower yourself. I always believe in you and I know that you can do it. So I hope this episode helped. Send me a DM on Instagram if it did help you today and check out all of my resources. Again. My coaching calendar for one-on-ones is opening up because, again, as I said at the top of this, I am going to have so much time to myself I don't even know what I'm going to do with it. So my one-on-one coaching calendar is open. You can schedule a consult below.
Speaker 1:A lot of my one-on-one coaching. I will tell you this Everybody I have coached, majority of them, I will say probably 90% of them them have all come to me because they have tried everything right. So, like that's always who I end up working with. And it's funny, one person that I just ended up coaching and at this point over probably 10 weeks sober, she didn't even want to come on the consult call. She was going to cancel it and at the end of our time together she was like I'm so happy I didn't cancel that call because this is where I am right now. That's who I coach. I mean I want you to try everything. I want you to be like, yeah, this doesn't work, this doesn't work. And then we go and plan what is going to work with you and what type of support you need at that time. So you will apply the link is below. You can apply to work with me one-on-one and then we get on a free Zoom call and see if we vibe together and I go greater into detail about my one-on-one coaching. If one-on-one coaching is not your thing, I highly recommend you join my sobriety circle.
Speaker 1:I will be adding more meetings on now with this extra bit of time that I have. September there's a National Sober Day party that we're going to do on the 14th. I'm not doing anything, no big parties. I thought I was going to be able to do it, but this past year of just working more on myself and my own healing journey that I've been on, I decided to not take that on my plate. But I hope to next year. I swear there will be a Detroit National Sober Day party. That will happen soon.
Speaker 1:But in Insanity, spirality Circle 2, there is you can do daily check-ins that I was talking about with tracking your progress, daily check-ins, personal development. I'm starting to share a lot more mocktails and A's and there's a great group of women in there who are ready, who are supporting one another, so it's great. And there's meetings every week and, like I said, I will get back to two meetings a week and I also do workshops in there once a month and those I do record, so you have access to the workshops from January of 2024 that have been recorded. All right, you can find those in the show notes below. If you haven't already, please rate, review and subscribe to the show. I really appreciate you listening and everyone. Have a kick-ass September. Keep on trucking and stay healthy out there.