At a crossroads and unsure of the path to take? Journey with me as we tackle the trials of change and the fear that often accompanies that. We’ll dig deep into the often confusing process of honoring our boundaries and standing tall in our worth, even when it hurts to do so.
I'm getting really personal today and peeling back the layers of a profoundly personal experience of betrayal. We’ll dive into maintaining boundaries and the grit it takes to insist on respect, despite the pain. Listen as I share my heartbreaking journey of confronting someone who betrays your trust, and how this experience served as a powerful catalyst for my own growth and self-love. Let's face these challenges together, transforming our pain into a tool for change and elevation. Tune in, connect, grow, and let's empower each other to rise.
At a crossroads and unsure of the path to take? Journey with me as we tackle the trials of change and the fear that often accompanies that. We’ll dig deep into the often confusing process of honoring our boundaries and standing tall in our worth, even when it hurts to do so.
I'm getting really personal today and peeling back the layers of a profoundly personal experience of betrayal. We’ll dive into maintaining boundaries and the grit it takes to insist on respect, despite the pain. Listen as I share my heartbreaking journey of confronting someone who betrays your trust, and how this experience served as a powerful catalyst for my own growth and self-love. Let's face these challenges together, transforming our pain into a tool for change and elevation. Tune in, connect, grow, and let's empower each other to rise.
Hi friends and welcome back to another. What I know in my heart will be an empowering episode of Elevate with Erica. Even though I may be fighting through a lot of different emotions just to get this recorded today and holding back tears in many, many moments, I just want to be upfront about that. I am really going to try not to cry today, but just know that I'm fighting through a lot and I'm handling it as best as I can. And if you will come along with me on this journey today, I know you'll still leave with inspiration and empowerment and I'm looking forward to finding a way, through my words, of still giving you the same vibe that this podcast always has had. So I'm your host, erica, and I'm thrilled to have you here on this journey with me. You guys know that my podcast episodes are that come with me vibe, and I'm always very open and honest about what I'm going through so that we can go through it together, because the truth is, everybody is going through something and we can make others not feel alone in that struggle by being honest about our own life. But, that being said, I have something personal going on in my life that I'm not ready to say out loud publicly. Yet, and I know that you guys will respect that and still feel like we're in this together. And whatever you're going through, just know that you aren't alone and that's why I'm still choosing to show up today when so much of my being wants to blast sad girl country songs and hide in my bathroom. Don't get me wrong, I have had many of those moments, but it's a choice to stay stuck in those moments as much as it is a choice to get up and dust myself off and decide to grow through this pain. I'm going to use my pain today.
Speaker 1:
This episode is a deep dive into a topic that resonates with all of us. At some point in our lives. Change and we're going to explore that moment when you realize that something in your life isn't serving you anymore and you'll find the courage to let go and aim for something better. And it's about recognizing your worth and standing up for yourself and honoring your boundaries and standards for the relationships and environments that you have in your life, fiercely honoring those things, because we've all been there right, that place where we find ourselves at a crossroads of comfort and growth. And it's that brave moment when you decide that you are deserving of more and that you're worthy of a life that allows the space for you to show up as your truest, happiest, most fulfilled self. But let's be real, because all that sounds good, but choosing change in these situations it's like shaking the foundation of your reality of life as you know it, and it often comes with a side of heartbreak and in my case, in this season, that I'm in a big, fucking horrible dark side of heartbreak. And it takes courage to leave the familiar behind and face the uncertainty of what lies ahead, even when you know you need to, even when you know your current reality isn't that freaking great either, right? It's just the suck that you're used to. Making decisions that are good for you can sometimes feel bad, and that's okay. We'll discuss why. It's perfectly normal to experience a sense of loss, even when you're gaining so much. My hope with this episode is that it will encourage you to embrace change, to believe in your worth and to keep your chin up as you embark on a new, unfamiliar path.
Speaker 1:
So three weeks ago to the day that I'm sitting here recording this, I uncovered something that would turn my world upside down, something that, in order to accept, I would have to sacrifice my own boundaries and standards for relationships and I have to tell you the hardest part of this betrayal initially is that it was going to be maybe the first time in my life when I let a personal boundary be enough, when I didn't betray myself just to keep someone. Now I've actually had this boundary my whole life. I voiced it, I've been loud with it, I've owned it, but I've never had it tested. And this one was hard for me because I know that what was a betrayal for me, what crossed a boundary for me, isn't universal, and I know that a lot of relationships would hold strong for this, but for me, for me, it was an immediate no. This is not okay. I will not be made to feel like this is okay, which was attempted by the person who betrayed me, and that was hard for me because my heart is broken, I am crushed. The reality that I knew is gone and the future that I thought I could see is now just filled with uncertainty.
Speaker 1:
And in many moments over the past three weeks, I've questioned myself. I've questioned myself because I know that so many would stay. I know that so many wouldn't end a relationship over this. I know so many would stay in it. And here I am standing my ground, backing my boundary, turning the life of me and my boys upside down, because for me it was a line crossed. So I've questioned Erica. Maybe you should just accept this. Maybe this is normal. Maybe you need to realize this is how it is. Maybe you need to just deal with it and get over it and try not to think about it and bury it in the back of your mind and just suck it up.
Speaker 1:
But I recognize that betraying myself, to accept someone else's betrayal, is breaking the trust I have in myself. It's breaking my own heart and sacrificing my own worthiness of loyal, honest relationships that are built on respect. The respect in this particular relationship is gone and that was proven to me when I gave this person an opportunity to own their mistake. So you know the part of the betrayal that was the hardest for me. At first it was backing my personal boundary, but today, today, the hardest part now, three weeks in of sitting with this the hardest part is in not feeling any remorse from that other person, not feeling like they tried anything to repair the relationship. I know someone else out there has felt this before too. Right Like a relationship ends and you feel like damn, they're just going on about their life. They're already moving on, ready to close the book on this one, and you're still over there struggling to let go. That's the pain I'm in today.
Speaker 1:
This person asked me if I was going to air their dirty laundry. Yeah, that was one of the questions. While I was sitting, crushed and my mind was on please show me something, tell me something to not end this relationship signature. And that should tell me a lot, shouldn't it? That that's what was on their mind and that's what was on mine. And still I can't come out and say exactly what's going on publicly yet because, as embarrassing as this is to admit, I still hope that this person makes me look stupid for being upset. I still hope that they try to save this and I still hope that they show some kind of remorse and effort and I don't feel good admitting that, but I'm being honest with you guys because this is real life and, as stupid as I know it sounds, I know not the only one who has been in this position before, and so I'm admitting it. I still hope that they try, even though I haven't even received any accountability from this person, only justification and excuses instead of ownership.
Speaker 1:
And this has been hard for me because here I am a motivational podcaster, a motivational presence on my social media platforms, and I'm in a position where I'm having to practice what I preach, but also in a position where I have to own publicly that my life is not perfect so that I continue to show up as the genuine Erica I've always been. Nothing I say is something I myself don't need to hear or having at some point needed to hear. I've said that many times on many episodes. I've got a lot of work to do on myself and, if I'm being 1000% honest with you guys, the betrayal from this person isn't the only thing that led to the end of the relationship. It was just the final straw.
Speaker 1:
I've been accepting crumbs for far too long and I know someone out there feels that I'm hoping would inspires you through this episode today is my honesty, the way that I'm owning me imperfect? The way I'm choosing to still show up even when I don't want to, the way I'm using my story and my pain to just let someone else out there going through something similar, know that they are not alone and, with the fake reality that social media can be People painting these picture perfect lives, picture perfect marriages and us seeing their highlight real as the way their life really is. I'm hoping that my vulnerability and willingness to share the parts of my story that most people hide Will inspire you to be more open about what's going on in your life. To Don't hoard your pain. Use it. Use it to push you forward, to fight for what you deserve, but also Use your story to help someone else through their struggle. You don't have to have it figured out yet, you don't have to have the answers yet, but you can show someone that we're in this together. You can be that for someone else, even if you're still in the dirt, like me. I was listening to a YouTube video or podcast the other day. I'm not intentionally not telling you the source to this, by the way, I normally do like to tell you the source. I'm not owning it. I've just put so much motivation between my ears the last three weeks to get me out of bed every day that I can't remember where I heard this, but it stuck with me.
Speaker 1:
The hard that you're in the change that you're making. It feels like you're in the dirt. I don't like to think of this dirt as soil. There's more to it, because out of this pain you are growing, you are becoming stronger and you are creating a foundation for the next amazing thing that's going to come into your life. It's soil. It's dirty and dark, yes, but you need to take care of yourself here too. Take care of you here so that you can grow here, so that something beautiful can bloom here.
Speaker 1:
If you're in a situation right now a relationship or an environment that you know just sucks right Like there's just no better word coming to me right now it just freaking sucks. If it's you, you'll know what I'm talking about. I need you to choose the other suck, the suck that has changed, because change hurts at first, healing hurts at first. But listen to me Do you want to remain in the pain? That is guaranteed. Like you know what the future looks like if you remain in this situation, you're in now. It's guaranteed. You're in it. The pain is guaranteed there. Loneliness is guaranteed there. The crap you're dealing with right now is guaranteed there. Move on. Why sit in the future that you don't want? That is guaranteed.
Speaker 1:
I'd personally rather move to something not guaranteed. That's just the truth. I rather not know where I'm going than to know I'm staying in the guaranteed continuance of what I've been dealing with. And let me say that again, directed directly to you, because I need you to hear me. You don't have to know where you're going, you just have to know where you're not staying. If nothing else comes out of this episode, I want you to own that. For me, today, that's you, that's us, honoring the boundaries and standards that we have for our life.
Speaker 1:
You guys, I just hope that this podcast made some sense. I hope that it sparked something within you to make a necessary change in your life, or you feel called to send this to a friend that you know needs to hear this today too, a friend that needs to know that they aren't alone in their pain. And I'm sorry I don't have more to give today. I'm sorry I can't say everything right now, I'm sorry that this may feel a little open-ended, but know this I'm doing the best that I can and sharing as much of my story as my heart is ready to and hopes that I can still do the work that lights me up during the season of my life and that is to inspire others to fight for the life that they are capable of living and not settle for the one where you're choosing the discomfort of staying in environments and relationships that aren't serving you over the discomfort of making the changes that could lead to the life that you deserve, the life of your dreams.
Speaker 1:
Change stretches us, it challenges us and it molds us into stronger, more resilient versions of ourselves. You are capable of making the change and it won't be easy, but that life that you'll have on the other side of the struggle, man is beautiful. You have to believe that. I believe that I have my weak moments, I have my ugly cries in the bathroom, but I believe that to be true for my life and I believe that to be true for yours. I'm working to embrace this heartbreak as a sign of bravery. Hey, testament to my willingness to evolve and seek better for my life.
Speaker 1:
As we wrap up today's episode, just take a moment to reflect on this. Every step that you take towards a better life is a step towards your own happiness and fulfillment, and sometimes those steps feel like steps up a steep mountain with no shoes on and it's on gravel, and you can't even see what's on the other side of the mountain. But remember, you know what's on this side of it you already know, and if more of the same stuff that's keeping you unhappy is guaranteed, I hope you'll take the painful step up that mountain today. I'm rooting for you. I'm walking with you always. If you enjoyed this episode today, don't forget to subscribe, leave a rating and review and share it with those who might find the inspiration they need today. Your support means the world to me and those of you who have been in my DMs, checking on me, sending me motivation and even just making sure I'm eating. Thank you Truly. Thank you Until next episode. Friends, russian.
