The White Tiger Podcast
Turning Adversity into an Unstoppable Mindset
In this episode, Craig and Asante discuss the arrest of PGA golfer Scottie Scheffler and predict that the case will be dismissed. They analyze the body cam footage and criticize the detective's handling of the situation.
They also discuss the importance of handling situations that are out of your control with grace and character. The conversation then shifts to Asante's experience in a Toastmasters competition and the importance of knowing and following the rules.
They discuss the impact of negative experiences and how they can shape people's perceptions of you. The conversation explores the importance of emotional resilience and maintaining composure in the face of adversity. It emphasizes the need to focus on what can be controlled and to use criticism and setbacks as motivation to improve.
The gents focus on the significance of the car ride home after emotional situations and the value of privacy and reflection. They also touch on the negative impact of social media on youth sports and much much more.
In this episode, Craig and Asante discuss the arrest of PGA golfer Scottie Scheffler and predict that the case will be dismissed. They analyze the body cam footage and criticize the detective's handling of the situation.
They also discuss the importance of handling situations that are out of your control with grace and character. The conversation then shifts to Asante's experience in a Toastmasters competition and the importance of knowing and following the rules.
They discuss the impact of negative experiences and how they can shape people's perceptions of you. The conversation explores the importance of emotional resilience and maintaining composure in the face of adversity. It emphasizes the need to focus on what can be controlled and to use criticism and setbacks as motivation to improve.
The gents focus on the significance of the car ride home after emotional situations and the value of privacy and reflection. They also touch on the negative impact of social media on youth sports and much much more.
What's up everybody? Welcome back again to another episode of the White Tiger Podcast. I'm here with, most importantly, me Asante.
Speaker 2:What's up man? What's up man? You are the other man that everyone loves, you know.
Speaker 1:Thank you, I appreciate that. It's always good to be loved, so, yes, it's a good thing. Hey, I wanted to tell you something. I'm making a bold prediction right now, straight off the bat, right out of the gate. Now, straight off the bat, right out of the gate. We talked about it in the last episode, but Scotty Scheffler, PGA golfer, arrested. Headlines of the PGA championship Case will be dismissed, Completely dismissed. The case again. You heard it here first. Listen it is first. Even if you're listening to this a week later and the results have already came in, we're saying it here first the case will be dismissed. I saw the video. I saw the videos that are out there and if that's the best that they've got, oh boy. And you're going to see some more negative talk around the police department how they handled the situation, and you're also going to maybe see some further disciplinary action on the detective that was primarily responsible for the arrest.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was suspicious that all the body cam footages were just off. And I asked you when we recorded the other episode, when they said I was attached to the car, that sounded so weird, the way that was worded was very peculiar. And then to see that footage that he basically just ran up on the guy's car, it was like how, how was he attached? So it looks very bad. Hatched, so it looks very bad. They need it, needs to be dismissed. Because if I'm scotty shuffler and I have the funds and resources to fight this to the death, I would just approve a point.
Speaker 1:It's just a bad look yeah, I, I agree with this, asante, but what I will tell you is, uh, the my, the body cam thing. I can understand a little bit, and what I'll say and what I want to add to that is this Sometimes the way especially if you're a detective and you're working in outside event, you're not in a uniform Sometimes you're responsible to be the one that's to activate it, right, like sometimes there's certain things. I'll give an example. Like I used to deal with audio, so video really didn't come out until the tail end of my career, but basically what would happen is, anytime you would activate the lights in your patrol car, the audio would automatically come on and the audio pack that you were carrying would automatically be activated. So there was something that was out of your control that it would just automatically do.
Speaker 1:In a case like this, I think they may have to and I'm not 100% sure manually activate it and especially if you're working an outside event where you're not in a patrol car or you're not, something that may not, you may not have the ability for it to do it automatically. I can see why maybe the body camera wouldn't. It doesn't mean that he shouldn't have. It doesn't mean that he did the right thing because he should have and he should have followed policy, and I get all that, but I could see how that could happen. Now, irregardless of that, it doesn't look good based on some of the things that he reported. From my understanding in the report and what the actual uh, what the view is, the optics of what is being presented to just the person to see. I mean, that's, this case is going away fast yeah, well, he was getting charged with like four felonies, wasn't it?
Speaker 1:um, I think the felony part was like the assault on an officer, because, like and it's an enhanced penalty right anytime that you have an assaulting an officer, but that's not the case here, unless there's something that completely been omitted. Like the officer made a point to go after the car, right, and it almost looks like he punched or hit the car or something it was. It looked like he actually tried to forcefully stop the car so he wasn't dragged or anything like that. That's what there's going to be nothing to be able to prove that unless there's something looming out there that nobody knows about. So that's going to disappear. So anything related to this, anything you hear about jail and that that's, that's a joke, and I think that the other stuff is just going to be dismissed. They're going to realize, like, there was a mistake made here, there was a misunderstanding, and we're going to just we're going to shuffle this out as quickly as possible, take our lumps and move on.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then the natural question that I go to is how many other times are mistakes made but it's not happening to one of the most famous people in the world, where it gets all this coverage to, where there is immediate pressure for them to back down.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think there's one thing that we need to learn is, anytime that you're in a position, in a law enforcement position, anytime you're dealing with someone who is famous there's an assumption that there's going to be a lot of focus on this situation you really need to make sure that you dot your I's and cross your T's and then do it twice right and do it properly.
Speaker 1:I think sometimes by letting the charade go on too long and I think eventually maybe the law enforcement, the city and the law enforcement side are going to realize and the prosecution ultimately is going to be like all right, we're showing everybody we're doing our due diligence, but at the same time, like the longer we let this go, the longer the worse that we're going to look and in the end it's just not going to be good and in the end it just doesn't bode well for your people's trust in you that you're doing the right thing of care would be taken in any situation, regardless of someone's famous or not, because there's a chance that someone's freedom can be taken away based off your decision to charge them with whatever.
Speaker 2:In my perfect world, I think this would be a hilarious thing to happen. But if scotty shuffler just turns full activist and he is just all out against uh, police abuse of power, like he just joins collin kaepernick's I know my rights camp, that would just be a hilarious turn for me that would be hilarious on many levels.
Speaker 1:One I don't think it's scotty shuffler. The second thing is he's a pro golfer. So golfer being like the gentleman's sport kind of you would think that you know you wouldn't see it, even though probably within the last 10 years that's changed a bit. But you never know. It would be entertaining and hell yeah, you know we'd get a lot of legs. It'd be pretty interesting. Yeah, it would, but it just shows that it can happen to anybody. Oh, it definitely can happen to anybody. It, hands down, can happen to anybody. Do people get treated differently? I agree that they do. Some people, do Situations get treated differently and I guess it all really depends. I mean, this situation was one of those things. That it probably happens a lot more to people that are not famous like Scotty Scheffler is right and unfortunately people catch a lot of bad breaks as a result of it because maybe they don't have the um backing or the means to to pursue it to its fullest extent to get you know, get justice.
Speaker 2:Yeah well, this feeds right into our question of the day and is how do you handle situations that are out of your control, that you know?
Speaker 1:are wrong. Yeah, that's perfect. That's perfect. You know we're having a reoccurring theme here. It's like, I think, no matter what you do, you have to go high. Remember, we talked about going high, going low, going to hell, all that stuff. I think it's about again going high, Like there's going to be situations that are out of your control and you're going to find every reason to want to fight back, and rightfully so. You may honestly be wronged you may honestly. The situation may be wrong, the people that are supporting it may be wrong, but you still need to go high for many reasons. You got to realize there's going to be certain things that are going to be out of your control that you can't have an impact on, and you can't let those things that you have no control over eat away at you and cause maybe a small to medium problem to be a large, extra large problem.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it really comes back to how you carry yourself and how you respond positively to the situation, because your reaction can easily make it worse and, even though you know it's wrong, the best thing you could do is handle it with as much character as you can in the moment, just like Scotty did. I think that he was very level-headed in his immediate press conference after the fact, when it would have been very understandable for him to be up in arms about how he just got mistreated going into this golf tournament. But he handled it with class and at the end of the day, it is going to be sorted out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you know what? Here's another thing, too, I want to talk about, like from a mindset standpoint and all this. You know, I see this situation and I realized why he's so successful, why he's a master champion, why he's a top rank golfer. Because distractions come in many forms, right, and and when they come, like you have to be prepared to cut out the noise. You know, I think first time I, when I hear this, I think kobe bryan was like a master at this right of of of just letting, cutting out the noise and focusing on the goal. And what's important, that's how you really are like you're a gamer, right you're, you're a champ. That's how, that's how champions win and this couldn't be any more distracting, right you have.
Speaker 1:You have a situation where the guy gets arrested going into the tournament. This is not something that happened like in between tournaments or something like that, and it just brought something to him. He's literally going to his tee time and he gets arrested. He gets released and comes back and shoots an amazing round and is in the top three for that day. I mean that in itself, like that's kind of what champions do, like they cut out the.
Speaker 1:I mean there's not much of a bigger distraction than that. Like think about all the things that could be going through your head and then playing a game like golf where you have to focus, like the focus is like ultra focused, and for you to come out and do that and to do and to produce like with that's that's pretty damn impressive. Like that's pretty damn impressive. And and I'm just saying there's something to be learned for that Like you want to know how, how champions react to adversity or to stress, I mean, there you go, that's a, that's a great picture right there about how someone who was playing at a high level reacts to stuff like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's that old quote Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react.
Speaker 2:Even if it's not as huge of a situation as getting arrested, there are plenty of smaller situations where we can feel like we're wronged or the circumstances aren't fair and we can make it much worse for ourselves.
Speaker 2:By actually sharing how we feel authentically when in the moment is probably going to serve you better to just be calm and keep your head on straight. One of the things that happened in college, when I was first getting benched, I was so upset about the situation. I didn't think it was fair, I didn't think it was right, but something that my dad shared with me was right now, you have your head in the mouth of a lion. The first thing you do when you have your head in the mouth of a lion don't move, don't start acting out, don't start drawing unnecessary attention to yourself because you feel so upset. You're not going to make your situation worse. You just have to be calm and then pet the lion, go along with the situation, understand what the rules are and do what you can to make it out safely or in the best case scenario.
Speaker 1:But a lot of times, us reacting emotionally is not going to get us what we really want no, not at all, and I will say this like anyone listening to this, because if I know, if I was on the listening end as opposed to the speaking end right now, I'd be like all right, this is all good and all, but it's hard to do. Like when you're emotionally attached to something and you're involved, that's it's one thing to say it, it's one thing for us to say it, but when you're in it, it's really hard. It's's real, that is real.
Speaker 1:But it doesn't mean that you can't work at trying to figure out how to better, one, prepare yourself for the situations, because they're going to happen, and, two, to better navigate through it.
Speaker 1:It's okay if you're like that in the beginning, give yourself the grace of getting through that emotion part, and that I want to tell everybody how they're screwing up the situation or screwing me or screwing someone I care about. Get through that situation. But then the cooler heads do prevail and just start thinking about like, all right now, how do I handle this moving forward? That's going to cause less stress for me, cause less headaches, and just make this as positive a situation as I can under my control, and that's that's. That's the best thing that you can do, but I don't. I think the thing is not to feel guilty for feeling the way that you do. It's normal and I think you should, right. But at the same time you do not want to let you know, to kind of piggyback off of the grudge conversation that we've had in a previous podcast. You want to let that linger because then it becomes you know you're getting you're, you're getting a lot of negative returns on that one.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I had to kind of learn that recently when I did the Toastmasters competition and their Toastmasters is a very old organization. There are set rules on how you're supposed to carry yourself and how you're supposed to dress, how you're supposed to deliver within the speech contest, and you know me, I kind of just show up and do my thing. I figure that I can do whatever I want to do in the best way possible and I'll get the results I want. Sometimes that works out, sometimes it doesn't.
Speaker 2:In this case, I got to the fourth round of the speech contest and when I got to the competition everybody was wearing suit and tie. I had seen other people wearing suit and tie. I didn't want to wear a suit and tie. I wanted to wear something that made me feel comfortable, that when I'm on stage speaking I will feel the most authentic to who I am. And other people were doing these over-the-top performative stuff which I thought is 100% goofy. But I had seen other contest winners doing the same thing and I still chose not to. But I had seen other contest winners doing the same thing and I still chose not to and I did not place in this round and in my opinion I was.
Speaker 2:I got railroaded because I thought I was better than every speaker up there, but I didn't play by the rules of Toastmasters and I was so upset. But when I got into the car and all my anger and frustrations swirling, a quote from the wise American poet Dwayne Michael Carter, better known as Lil Wayne, came to my head. He said when you're jumping in the game, you better read the rules. So, in any situation, you have to know the expectations to succeed, and if you don't, the expectations to succeed, and if you don't, then you learn. However, and the next time you are in the same situation, you now know the rules, but you have to know what you're getting into before you're getting into it.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, that's great advice you really do need to know and to be honest with you, like, first of all, you look fantastic. I saw the video and I thought you were best dressed out of all. And, yeah, I think the most important thing that you said out of that whole thing is that Toastmasters is an older organization, right, and I think, sometimes too, is that when you get you got to understand, like you know, when you're more conservative, like the conservative, it's like, irregardless of what you maybe say, the things that that align with that conservative perspective are going to score you points and the things that are maybe not aligned are not. You know people, maybe there's an expectation that you need to wear a tie or wear khakis or whatever, and if you don't, irregardless of how fantastic your content is, and that's maybe where the system is broken in that respect.
Speaker 1:But I think again, it's like you're right, it's about knowing the rules and knowing your expectations of hey, listen, I'm doing this, I'm taking part in this and I understand this is the type of organization that I'm speaking with or being part of, and and not that it's right or wrong. It's just like, all right, this, these are going to be my expectations or this is going to be what maybe is expected from their perspective, and it is what it is, yeah. But I got to say, though awesome, you did a fantastic job, you looked fantastic. And listen, I agree, were you robbed? 100% you were robbed, but you know, I'm more progressive, I think, than Toastmasters, but that's just me.
Speaker 2:I appreciate that I didn't necessarily think that after all five went that I would win, because the person who went after me, he had a very funny speech. It was also unrealistic, so there was some severe embellishments that I didn't know that that type of stuff was allowed, but it was funny. He had the crowd rolling. So as he was delivering a speech I was like okay, this guy won, but I was very confident that. I was like okay, this guy won, but I was very confident that I was at least top three. So when I didn't even place, I was seeing red. And then the most embarrassing part for me was they called, they said his name as the first place winner and as he's walking through the crowd up to the stage, I'm on a table that's closest to the stage. So as he's walking by me, kind of like past my shoulder, and I go to shake his hand and he just keeps going. So I'm just like coming up grabbing air. So I was just even more embarrassed oh, dude, I hate that.
Speaker 1:I hate that. I had a guy. I had a guy. I said man, I had a situation like this Recently. I met someone at my son's baseball game and I was shaking hands with stuff and I shook his hand and he looked the other way and that drives me insane, dude, it drives me insane. I actually shook one guy's hand. Hey, how you doing? I said hi, and then I shook the other guy's hand and he shook my hand. His head was like, not focused on me, and that drives me nuts. It drives me crazy.
Speaker 1:I just think it's a respect thing. Can I control it? No, do I feel like I was wrong? Yes, but like, oh man, it drives me nuts, like you have. You know what.
Speaker 1:I don't want to sound old, but I feel like some of that proper etiquette as far as mutual respect between people is diminishing, is going away. Maybe it's because we're more like, we're doing everything remotely, we're not having as many social experiences as we used to, but oh man, that drives me nuts. And you know what the crazy part is? Am I holding a grudge? A thousand percent, I'm holding a grudge. I'll never forget it. I'll never forget it. I'm just be like you know what, and that's the thing too. It's like you people remember the things that the maybe the one thing that you did wrong, as opposed to the 90 things that you did right. You know, and I think that's hard to navigate sometimes. I think you really got to you. Really you got to be careful with the things you do, because the things that are out of your control is exactly that what people think of you, and not that it really matters, but like you can easily get a shitty reputation for a, for a mistake, right, for something that you did wrong, and people could hold on to a grudge and people can maybe assume.
Speaker 1:You know, there was a situation that happened recently, um, in the sports uh, baseball space where a coach forcefully grabbed a kid Right and, um, it was at the end of the game and the kid said something to him he didn't like and he was forcefully grabbed. And what I will tell you is like, despite, like what the kid like, despite the optics were horrific, horrific. But what I will say is like this guy's never going to be able to shake that People are and he from everyone's like hey, he's always been a great guy, totally out of character, couldn't understand, like and listen people.
Speaker 1:There's a lot of things going on in people's lives and people are stressed and maybe it's just something that sets someone off, and I can understand that. When you look out at it, right, it doesn't make anything right by any means, especially when you're dealing with children and you're in a coaching capacity. But what I will say is like, how do you shake that? You don't shake it. People will always remember that happening and you being the center of of that situation and you're going to be, whether it's fair or unfair, five years, 10 years from now, people are going to never forget that situation, especially that involved the kid. It's even more like, significant and more burned into people's memories about that individual and that's that's the massive price that that individual is going to pay for something similar to that or something like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, those negative experiences always stick out more. It's so true that quote people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but they'll never forget how you made them feel. That is even the smallest slight. I remember that I was meeting this person for the first time when I was like eight years old and he didn't give me a firm handshake and I had never forgotten that. It was around the time when my dad was teaching me like when you you greet a man, you like give him a firm handshake, look him in the eye. So that was very top of mind at the time and I met this person. Like he didn't give me a firm handshake. So to this day that is kind of swirling in my relationship with him and it's still kind of holds true. But I do have questions about this baseball situation. This man put his hands on a kid that was not his correct were that kid's parents present.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think at the time that it happened they didn't realize that it happened and it wasn't brought to their attention until after the fact, shortly thereafter the fact. But after the fact, I don't know all the details, but I saw it. I saw the video of it, because nowadays all this stuff is video, like everything's on video, many videos and yeah, optics were super bad, super, super bad.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you can never put your hand on a kid, especially one that's not yours.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, no. And listen, I've been privy to kids saying some stupid hurtful things Uh, not, you know, and I understand it, but like it still doesn't give you any you. There's some, there's certain things in, but like it still doesn't give you any you. There's some, there's certain things in life that you just don't do, and that's just one of the things you don't do as an adult. You don't. You don't do that to kids. You don't, especially especially like you, whether they I don't know what goes through people's heads Sometimes.
Speaker 1:I mean, I've seen a lot of nasty things in my time, but what I will say is, in this space for something like that, this is obviously something you can't do, especially if it's not your kid.
Speaker 1:You can't do that um and again, like from a from a thing, like the one thing that's gonna be out of this guy's control and it's something he's gonna have to navigate, is trying to beat that, that stereotype, or maybe that's the wrong word, but beat that like assumption that he's whatever he is, whatever that person thinks. He is a, an abuser, someone who hates kids, a shitty coach, a shitty person, you know whatever, and it's like that's gonna stick around and listen. There's a lot of things that are happening now behind the scenes to not to avoid ever that have having that happen again with kids and in there and so on, and I don't know all the details, but I just felt it was really pertinent to what we're talking about because that's a pretty significant situation that maybe you had a lot of responses like maybe Scotty Scheffler didn't do anything wrong in his, but this is something like you, you know you did something wrong and it's pretty obvious. Uh, you're going to have to live with that and try to navigate that for quite some time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a tough one to shake, but you know that kids say just mean things to each other all the time and how do they handle being in a situation where someone is maybe getting like preferential treatment, but they know that they're not a good person, stuff like that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, I think that's kind of hard. I think, um, so I think, ultimately getting back to what we're talking about, as far as, like Scotty Scheffler and Kobe Bryant, and having that champion's mindset, I think ultimately that's what it comes down to. I think, irregardless and this is something you really start to focus on and it's really important for young kids and a lot of it in the beginning they may not get, but eventually, if they hear it enough, they're going to start to realize, like, how important it is. They're going to hear it from somebody else and then they're going to realize, like what you were saying was super, spot on, but the reality is is that you always have to go high, but you, in the end, it doesn't. You control. You can control and in the end, it doesn't impact what you do. People can say whatever they want. You know what you need to do. If you need to do more, if you need to continue doing what you're doing and you just do, you run your race.
Speaker 1:There's going to be a lot of things that are going to come up. Right, I know you love Mario Kart. There's going to be the red shell is going to come shooting out after you. You're going to. You know you're going to get hit. You're going to get. You know you're going to hit the oil slick. You know how it goes. Things are going to come up in life but you got to knock that out and your goal is still to win. And I know how relentless you are at Mario Kart and I know you understand this analogy very, very clearly. But especially when you're playing kids, that's a whole nother story. But aside from that, yeah, things come up right, asante, and I think ultimately, for the end, it's like I think you need to teach kids that listen. You're going to face a lot of adversity. You're going to people are going to say things that you're probably not going to like. People are going to say things that maybe don't um, that that make you feel bad, and they may not be other kids, it could be adults, and you know what you have to.
Speaker 1:It should not stop the train from rolling. You got to keep the train rolling. You got to keep doing what you're doing and find something in it. I would tell my son you need to find motivation in it. That should be the fuel for your fire. If it bothers you enough, then do something with it. Don't miss the opportunity to do something with it. Don't miss the opportunity to take it and use it for motivation to be better at your craft, whatever it is. Use it as a method to maybe help another teammate that's struggling out, struggling with it, to use it as motivation to prove the doubters wrong. Use it as motivation to know that you're doing the right thing, cause I also find that people who are critical are doubting themselves, so it makes them feel better to criticize somebody else.
Speaker 1:Right, usually the critics are the ones that are the ones that are struggling the most. Then they are now looking to push that criticism on somebody else to get it off of their plate, not to somebody else's plate, or they want to have someone share the crappy feeling they have. So they have to share that crappy feeling with somebody else to make them feel better. I think that's where, once you realize that that's the core of what's happening, whether it be from a coach's standpoint or a teammate standpoint I think you can better navigate. When it comes up, like when it shows and presents itself, you got to realize, like it's not about me, I'm doing what I'm doing and listen the one or two things that come up.
Speaker 1:If this happens to you, or it's happened to your kid, or it's happening to someone that you know like, understand what's the totality of the circumstances? The totality of circumstances. I'm sure you're doing great and things are really going well. It's the one or two things that come up and they're insignificant, like the truth presents itself over a course of time. Right, if you in a sports space, if you're struggling, you know you're struggling without anybody else telling you that you're struggling. Right, you don't need someone else to confirm whether you are or you're not. The flip side to that is, if you're doing really really well, you also know you're doing really really well and you don't need anyone else to tell you that you're doing really really well. And then when someone says that you're not doing well, it's very contradictory to what you know and believe. So I think if you do some soul searching, you'd realize, yeah, I'm doing really well.
Speaker 1:This is just outside noise, it's just something that they got going on and they're just trying to pull me down. You know, I always said and I'm going to bring this up again there's always there's three type of people in this world right, there's the sinkers, there's the swimmers and there's the floaters. Right, the floaters are the ones that don't move ahead. They don't move behind, they just stay put. They're just happy in their comfort zone. And then there's the sinkers. And the sinkers are the ones that are unhappy and they're the ones that find people in the pool and they bring them down.
Speaker 1:And I think in the end you've got to always try to be the swimmer. The swimmer is always the one that's moving right. They're always moving. They're not bringing anybody down, they're getting out of their comfort zone and they're moving. So be a swimmer In any sport. Use that analogy like hey, bring your son, bring your teammates aside, give them that speech, tell them guys, listen, we all need to be swimmers here, we all need to move forward and we swim as a group, we swim as a team. If it's a team sport, or if you're in an individual sport like golf or tennis or something like that, like hey, no-transcript.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I love that analogy, it's so true. And something else that I think all kids should learn at an early age is that emotional resilience, that ability to not fly off the handle when you're upset, was If by Ruya Kipling, and I think the first lines in it are if you can keep your head when all around you are doubting you. If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you. If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you but make allowance for their doubting too. And that ability to stay calm when there is a lot of chaos or people are just piling on you saying you're doing all this wrong, doing that wrong.
Speaker 2:Your ability to kind of just stay level-headed and even keeled through that situation is so powerful because it's understandable when people get upset and they fly off the handle or they lose their composure, but it is helpful. And learning how to control that early will set you up for success long term Because, like you said, there's going to be so much that's out of your control. But if you can stay focused on what can I do to keep swimming and not turn into a sinker and trying to pull other people down like what can I do to stay level headed and keep moving forward?
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you know what. The one thing you can do is like if all else fails, you just have to take some type of action. You have to take some type of action Like if it's like I don't feel good today or I'm just um, someone said something, um that bothered me or I'm going through a hard time, take action Like you go out, you get yourself moving, you know, and using baseball as an analogy, let's say youth sports or whatever, it is Like if you feel like someone's you know not being nice or a good teammate or supportive or whatever, or someone else is getting preferential treatment, then go out and hit some balls, go out and practice, go out and pour into your craft and into what you do. I think there's a big subconscious thing to that too. So while you're doing it, I think subconsciously you're putting in the work right and it's a reinforcement that you're doing the work to get better, because you're also getting that noise from a lot of other places, from other people, from other coaches, from social media.
Speaker 1:I'm telling you right now, social media is a massive source for a lot of things, both good and bad, in youth sports and in life. Obviously, we've talked about it a bunch, but you're going to start seeing it a lot. You're starting to see a lot now youth sports, like. There's a lot of pressure for kids at a very young age, um, and parents for that matter. That uh is being fueled by what they see and hear on on social media, and I think there's a lot of keeping up with the Joneses and this is a whole nother conversation we should have at some point. But there's a lot of like, dirtiness in in sports.
Speaker 2:I use sports today and it's unfortunate yeah, I I bet there is, and especially with social media adding fuel to the fire and everyone trying to seem like they are further along than they really are, it's even harder to stay objective about what's really going on. But at the end of the day, you have to take all the lessons that life gives you and use it as some sort of fuel. So, with the contest I just lost, I was upset at first, but then what I did was I reached out to two of the higher up people that were there One was the overall chief judge of the contest and just getting some feedback around. What could I have done to do better in another competition, where was I lacking? And I got some very valuable information and the stuff that I didn't necessarily agree with Around how things are presented.
Speaker 2:That is kind of the game you have to play. And now I know, moving forward, if, when I want to do this again, that I'm more prepared, I have the necessary tools to be more successful. But I took the time to not just cast it off, as this isn't fair. I don't want to play this game anymore. It's more. I learned what can I do to be successful in this situation and where could I take some of these lessons and apply it other places, but it's always a learning opportunity yeah, and I think the lessons even go extend beyond toastmasters.
Speaker 1:Right, because now, when you get involved in something else, you're going to read the rules. Right, you're going to take the time to to read the rules and you know what's going to happen. Is you're going to do it? Well, maybe, but but what's going to, what's going to happen is you'll do, if it's something you want to do and you decide to do it, or you're going to, you're going to dive in, read the rules, right, and also to the benefit to.
Speaker 1:That is not just understanding you know how you play the game, but also whether or not you want to play the game at all. Like you may get into it, read the rules and be like this is not my game. I want to play or I'm willing to play, so I'm, I'm just not going to play it. So that gets to save you a boatload of time. You know, if you know, if someone says, hey, you know you have to wear, you know, uh, uh, a sport jacket and a plaid tie and khakis in order for you to do this, and that's just not your flavor. Like you're not going to do it, I'm like you know what.
Speaker 2:I'll find that. I'll find that you know sandbox to play in. Yeah for sure. The competitor in me is going to do it again. So I just I can't go out like that. I'm dude. I lost to a dude who I lost to people who I genuinely they are good at what they do, they are good at playing that game, but the competitor in me is upset that I lost to people who I feel I am light years better than.
Speaker 1:Hey, winners win. Competitors compete, right. So you, you get back in the ring. Dude, you're going to get back in the ring. That's what winners do? You just do it Like and again, and here's the here's the last thing I want to say about this and this again could be a whole nother podcast worthy is like this is good, like this is really really good, asante, like this fat, you call it failure, but whatever you want to call it failure feedback, whatever term you want to put on it it's super good and you're getting more out of this than you would if you won the whole thing. Right, honestly, like I, I feel like there's so much here to to bite off on or to chew on. There's so much here. I think there's a blessing in this, for sure.
Speaker 2:This was also the first time I lost in something in a very long time and it was a good reminder of what that feels like and how it can be motivational or, if you choose, it could cause you to shut down, and I'm glad that my initial reaction after all the f-bombs I dropped in the car, after all that subsided. It was more so. Okay, how can I use this to get better? Because it was a little humbling. But I know that ultimately this is gonna be like my villain origin story, like after that loss, like I just turned into a monster and this it propelled me so much further.
Speaker 1:I know that's crazy. Hey, you ever think about this. You ever think about all the things that happen inside of a car, those during a car ride home from something. Like all the things that happen, the good things, the bad things, the words you say, the comments, the talking to yourself. You know just the moments that you go through in life.
Speaker 1:I think the car ride or driving has such an plays, such an important part in it all. Like everyone can go back to a car story, a story about after the game conversation you had, or after the you know, or the job interview or whatever it is. Or you know, relationship that ended crappy or relationship that just turned into something fantastic. Like the car ride home from that. Like there's something. There's always a car involved, there's always emotion involved and it's always I, I, everyone has one. It's just something cool. Maybe there's something to that, not that it's a business opportunity, but maybe there's a really cool reality TV show or something that about the. You know what happens on the inside of a car after, after, like emotional situations in people's lives.
Speaker 2:Yeah, car ride is magical. It's soundproof. You can turn up your music as loud as you want, you can yell and sing as loud as you want, and it's just you in there, and you don't have to be anxious about what other people think or what other people are viewing, as you say. I mean, you can do whatever you want. You can go crazy, you got. You have tended windows Like no one could see.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I find I really appreciated tinted windows when I was a police officer. I hated him for various reasons. I hated him. Now I'm a big fan. I am a big fan. I. I want tinted windows. I need tinted windows. I had them.
Speaker 2:And then the car I had is no longer with me, so I need to reinvest in some tinted windows. Would you go?
Speaker 1:like full illegal tint or just no, I would go with like the casual tint, enough that I can see out without it being like dark when it's bright light out and at the same time with, just you know, having some more privacy tint, not limo tint like that, know none of that. And then some, then tin also gets carried away. People put it on their front windshield, which I think is ridiculous. But I don't want to go off on too much of a tangent. But yeah, I wanted to appreciate tint for various reasons.
Speaker 2:Uh, much more than I used to yeah, it does add another element of privacy. You do feel a little awkward if you're just riding around. My buddy's called you just ride around in a fishbowl.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I could just see you in all angles yeah, I mean, listen, there's a reason why manufacturers put it on the back windows, right, and it's just not all like clear windows. I mean there's a reason for it. It does have a ton of value. But yeah, I don't know, maybe some police don't like it or it's legal some some areas, I don't know. I mean that's kind of petty if you're fishing for people because of their tint, but that's a whole other conversation.
Speaker 1:Anyway, listen, asante, you heard it here first from me, I'm going to be the first one to put it out there to the universe and I want full credit when this does happen. But all the charges against Scotty Scheffler will be dropped, maybe this week. I can't see it going much longer because if it does, I think it's just going to be more egg on the authority in the city of Louisville's face. So I'm thinking my prediction and not even a bold prediction, very accurate prediction is that will be happening shortly. Also, just a reference to being able to control situations that you know are wrong. Again, go high, only control what you can control and really figure out what the learning experience is in for you and just file that away for next time, because it's going to happen again. And yeah, again, that's the best advice I can give and be a swimmer, don't be a sinker.
Speaker 2:I love it. I'm going to make another bold prediction that I'm a little less confident in, but Scotty Schefter will be the next ambassador for the I Know my Rights camp.
Speaker 1:Are you willing to put money on that prediction?
Speaker 2:I'm not, but I'm willing to say it into a microphone.
Speaker 1:All right. Well, there you go. All right, that pretty much shows you that he's probably like. It's like you got your big toe in the water and you're just not sure if you want to completely jump in. Yeah, nice.
Speaker 2:I have a take. I'd throw a take out there. If it happens, it happens.
Speaker 1:If it doesn't, it doesn't, that's all we so, asante, thanks so much. Listen. I really liked this one. I thought there was a lot of uh awesome information that we talked about and, if you're listening, hopefully there's something here that you can take away from and uh that you relate to, and if that's the case, success our job is uh complete.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, we'll catch you guys next time, yeah.