Mom on Purpose

The Best Advice That Will Change What You're Teaching Your Kids

May 08, 2024 Lara Johnson
The Best Advice That Will Change What You're Teaching Your Kids
Mom on Purpose
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Mom on Purpose
The Best Advice That Will Change What You're Teaching Your Kids
May 08, 2024
Lara Johnson

Join us in a heartwarming tribute to the silent yet formidable force that is motherhood, as we welcome the remarkable Ana Tajder, creator and host of the "Thank You, Mama" podcast.

On this very special episode, Ana brings her global perspective, sharing both her own story as the child of a famous actress and artist, and the many mom stories she's gathered from around the world.

This is a journey many moms know well as they balance their own dreams with family life. This episode isn't just about praising moms; it's about learning from our own moms to grow, take care of ourselves, and be confident.

Remember, you're not alone in this journey. We're in this together, learning to live our lives with purpose, one story at a time.

What you'll learn in this episode:  

  • The maternal influence across different cultures and environments
  • How to live with intention and follow your true passion in motherhood
  • The stories and struggles faced by mothers around the world
  • The resilience of mothers and the courage they instill in their children
  • Prioritizing your own well-being to avoid burnout and remain healthy for your families

Featured on the Show: 

Click HERE to watch this video to learn The 3 Things to Avoid When Reading Self-Help Books

How to Connect with Lara:

Web: www.larajohnsoncoaching.com

Instagram: www.instagram.com/j.lara.johnson/

Facebook: www.facebook.com/larajohnsoncoaching

Work with Lara: www.larajohnsoncoaching.com/work-with-me/

Show Notes Transcript

Join us in a heartwarming tribute to the silent yet formidable force that is motherhood, as we welcome the remarkable Ana Tajder, creator and host of the "Thank You, Mama" podcast.

On this very special episode, Ana brings her global perspective, sharing both her own story as the child of a famous actress and artist, and the many mom stories she's gathered from around the world.

This is a journey many moms know well as they balance their own dreams with family life. This episode isn't just about praising moms; it's about learning from our own moms to grow, take care of ourselves, and be confident.

Remember, you're not alone in this journey. We're in this together, learning to live our lives with purpose, one story at a time.

What you'll learn in this episode:  

  • The maternal influence across different cultures and environments
  • How to live with intention and follow your true passion in motherhood
  • The stories and struggles faced by mothers around the world
  • The resilience of mothers and the courage they instill in their children
  • Prioritizing your own well-being to avoid burnout and remain healthy for your families

Featured on the Show: 

Click HERE to watch this video to learn The 3 Things to Avoid When Reading Self-Help Books

How to Connect with Lara:

Web: www.larajohnsoncoaching.com

Instagram: www.instagram.com/j.lara.johnson/

Facebook: www.facebook.com/larajohnsoncoaching

Work with Lara: www.larajohnsoncoaching.com/work-with-me/

Welcome to the Mom On Purpose podcast. I'm Lara Johnson, and I'm here to teach you how to get out of your funk, be in a better mood, play more with your kids, manage your home better, get your to do list done and live your life on purpose. With my proven method, this is possible for you, and I'll show you how.

You're not alone anymore. We're in this together.
 
 Lara 

Hello, welcome to the Mom On Purpose podcast. I have a very special guest today and I will tell you that I just barely met Ana not too long ago, and we've had so much fun being able to talk. I find that every time she talks my whole face just lights up. So, she'll tell you a little bit about herself. But she is from Austria and so it's so cool. You know, as part of being a member of like the podcast community, like we find people from all over the world and you know I have coaches or I have clients from all over the world, and it really is just an incredible opportunity that wherever you go in the world, you now know someone. So now you all know Ana Tajder.

Lara 

And she has a podcast called Thank you, Mama, where she interviews women all over the world about the lessons that they learned from their mothers and some of the things they wish their mothers would have taught them. So, since this is a special episode, we're launching it right before Mother's Day here in the US, so that all of the moms here are really able to accept the amazing women that they are and also remember like the lessons that we're teaching our children have the impact of a lifetime. Okay, Ana, you are welcome to share a little bit about you and how you decided to do a podcast about mothers. 

Ana

Thank you. I'm really excited to be here. We really had so much fun doing the interview for my podcast. So, as I told you, it's so nice to see you again and talk to you again. Let's do this every week. Yeah, so I the podcast. 

I had an amazing mom. I really had an amazing mom, who was definitely not a perfect mom, but we were extremely close. I'm an only child. She was generally an amazing person. She had two careers. Child, she was generally an amazing person. She had two careers. 

She was equally successful and awarded and celebrated for being a very talented actress movie actress. She was a movie star and for her beauty, but also while she was accidentally discovered when she was 17, this is when she did her first movie. So, while her movie career took off, she decided she also wanted to graduate from the academy of arts to become an artist and a painter. So, she had two parallel careers, which is amazing. She was awarded, you know, and admired for her artistic talent as much as her acting, and her beauty and her presence, and she just spread so much joy around with this. 

She was a completely chaotic artist, thus a completely chaotic mom. It meant mom was working and mom was, you know, going around giving interviews and working, which meant sometimes there was no breakfast or lunch. You know I would get money and buy lunch somewhere in the store on the way to school. Like I'm saying, she wasn't perfect. There was no structure, which now I love so much. I have structure in my home with my son and now I'm enjoying it. Now I'm giving him what I didn't have, but I learned so much from her and we became best friends, and we were like soul sisters and best friends. 

So, once I lost her very unexpectedly to lung cancer in 2016, I was standing at an abyss Like this was really earth shattering for me, ground shattering. What do you say? I remember one day I was panicking that I was going to forget what she told me, and I had a feeling if I forget what she told me, I'm going to lose her completely and forget her. So, I started writing these things down and I realized I'm writing a book of her life through her lessons, which I talked to my friends about, and the reactions were amazing because women told me oh my god, this is so important. I never thought about this. You know, it's so obvious. What, what did I learn from my mom, and why? What do I wish I learned, but we never think about this, especially not while they're alive. And this is how I got this idea to start a podcast and interview women about this topic. 

Now, my mom always raised me to always see the big picture, to never exclude, to always try to get the helicopter view, and she was an amazing editor for when I started becoming a journalist and I would send her my articles and she would say, yeah, but what about the other angle? You know, I would write this article about fancy coffee shops in Los Angeles, and she said, but this article is not complete if you don't have the poor farmers you know in these third world countries who are growing this coffee. So, this is how I immediately knew this podcast has to be global and it has to really cover women from all over the world, all the different countries, generations, backgrounds, lifestyles. You name it, I have it. So, it's four years old now. You name it, I have it. So, it's four years old now. It has 145 episodes and guests from 70, over 70 countries. 

Oh my gosh, that's incredible. It's incredible, and we've covered topics you cannot imagine. I had a guest from Africa who told me about how her mom suffered from witch hunt. When her father died, they decided to take everything away from her by pronouncing her a witch and they started a witch hunt against this woman. I had guests whose mothers were forced into, you know, a marriage when they were little girls. We talked about things that I never saw directly. You know, you read about certain things, about what's going on with women around the globe, but once you hear this mother stories and learn from them, it's such a gift. I can't tell you this, but every time I record an interview, I feel like it's Christmas. I feel like I got this amazing present. I'm just. It fills me with so much happiness. 

Lara 

How do you do the hard stories like that? I mean, that's got to be in some ways emotionally jarring. 

Ana

I you know what. I just recorded an interview and edited it yesterday, with a woman from Bosnia whose mom had five children and was a stay-at-home mom now in a Bosnian Muslim family in a small village, treated like a slave by her husband. There was a lot of domestic violence. She was obviously very abused, this mom, but then the war broke out and not only that, but then the mom suffered a horrendous accident in the backyard which my guest witnessed when she was seven and she unfortunately described it a little too picturesque to me what it really. It was very and I, yesterday I was editing this episode, and I was fighting. 

I didn't know if I should censor this or not, you know if I should edit it out, but I decided this is this to his life, you know this to his life, and this is what she witnessed and learned, and this is what she learned from. So, I just left it in there. But I have to tell you this there are stories that leave me very raw and I'm also learning. I think I'm learning to be a psychiatrist a little bit. I'm learning to deal with this and absorb it and what to do with all this information and lives and destinies. 

Lara 

I think you, even just leaving it in there, it almost like it gives space for us, for women, to have a history. You know, for so much of history women's stories have not been included or have been erased history. Women's stories have not been included or have been erased. So, the fact that you are documenting it, even the hard stories, I really applaud you because that's, that's incredible, for you to give space to women that haven't had space in other places in the world or in history. So, thank you for that, thank you for saying that about how you are living your purpose and how life-giving it is as you're doing that. 

Ana

I'll try to be very short, because my story is quite long and complex. But, as I mentioned, my mom was an actress and an artist. My father is an architect. It was always expected. I grew up in this creative, artistic family and I had artistic talent, and everybody always took it for granted. I too will go to the school of arts and become a visual, some kind of a visual artist. 

I did go to a high school for artists in Croatia. I'm originally Croatian but then the war broke out and this is, yet another crazy experience and we had to flee. So, we fled. This is how we landed in Austria, but then, when I continued my schooling in Austria, I decided for myself that I don't want to be a poor artist. I wanted to be. You know, I wanted to earn money and be a successful businesswoman. So, I started marketing management and then I did an MBA, and I really was very ambitious and worked very hard. 

I had a fantastic, wonderful career in telecommunications, in strategic planning and marketing for telecommunications, but then I accidentally started writing a book, literally accidentally. One day I was talking to my neighbors. I had a very fun. We lived in this apartment building with small apartments a new one, mostly single young people, and we had some quite crazy stories in this building and one day I was on a sick leave. I was at home, and we were. I met some of the neighbors and we talked about these stories, and I went back into my apartment and thought I should write this down because these stories are so incredible. And then I started writing them down and I had so much fun doing this. I still clearly remember everything the shine on the ink. I love my, my fountain pen, so I write with fountain I. I still have this picture of the first letter of the first fresh ink, when I started writing these stories, yeah, and I started writing them. 

and then I realized this is so fun. It's Christmas soon. I'm going to write little books about our stories in the house and give them to neighbors as Christmas presents, you know, put our pictures in and these funny stories and I couldn't stop writing I had. This was the purest joy, the biggest fulfillment, the happiest I've ever been in my life. When I was writing which I was 30 something I never thought about this, that this could be a calling, and so I wrote these little booklets, and I couldn't stop writing. So, in the evenings I would come home from work, or on the weekends I just dedicated. This was, it's not dedicated, it's just this was the most fun I could have when not working, you know, was to write. 

And I wrote 400 pages, or 600 pages of a manuscript which, when it was finished, I just put in my drawer, thinking that was it, you know. But then my friends who read some of these books said, kept pushing me to send them to publishers and which, at one point, two years later, I think, was in a drawer for two years. And then on one more point, I thought it just wouldn't leave me, I, you know. Suddenly I realized that what I was doing in my office was not, this was not my calling, and I decided to collect the courage and send the book. 

And when you, when you inform yourself about this, everybody warns you. This is such a hard process. You have to send out your manuscript to you know, hundreds of places. So, I thought I'll just print a list of all the publishers and start from the best one, and then I'll go down, you know, and somewhere down the line, some little publishing company will maybe say yes to my book. And so, I sent it to the biggest publisher, and they called me three days later and they said we want to publish it. 

It's a dream, it was incredible. And here is something so important. Once you tap into this. And then I quit my job, you know, and once you dare, once you find this and once you dare is to say yes to it and have the courage because it's you know, it was risky. I had a very well-paying job. It was risky to become the poor, starving artist I didn't want to be originally. 

Suddenly, I always say the universe rolled out a red carpet for me. Things were coming. This book got published in the other book and all the publishers said yes, and then the magazines started asking me if I wanted to write for them. You know, things were just coming my way and whatever door I knocked started opening up, and this is how I became a book author and a journalist. 

And now the crowning of the story is for the last few years I was dreaming of starting to teach, because now I have 25 years of experience both in management and marketing, advertising, journalism you know, podcasting have so much to give to a new generation and I really felt like I would like to give them what I wish I learned at the university, what I had to learn on the way as I started my professional life. I managed. I started teaching. I became a professor a year ago and I just received an invitation just before we got on the call to attend the first graduation ceremony. I was asked about my size so I can get the professor's cap and gown and stand on the stage and say congratulations to my first round of babies, and I'm so happy. I can't tell you how happy that makes me. 

Lara 

The whole thing is beautiful and that's what I always tell listeners, I tell my clients is that you choose your calling as much as your calling chooses you. Like it like comes together. It's this beautiful force and when it happens it's like your whole body just lights up and you lose track of time and it's like the thing that you can't stop. But it's a journey. It doesn't happen like you were saying, like you had a whole career before that even happened. But the more you follow your joy, the more likely you are to find it, and I think just the fact that it's so life-giving to you, I think sometimes as moms, we think we can't do one more thing on our plate, but that thing is what makes all the other things on our plate possible, because it's so giving. 

Ana

I want to tell you something apropos moms, and this is something I learned from my mom. She was really this is one of the things she was telling me she was really trying to pass this lesson on to me and she said listen, woman's life comes in phases. There is a phase for everything is a phase to have a career. There is a phase to be a mom. There's a phase to have both of these things. There's a phase because I was always very ambitious and very, I didn't have patience. And she said you always said have patience. You know, now you have a baby, now you concentrate on your baby, in a few months or years, whenever you're ready, you will be able to, you know, have it all. 

It doesn't have to be right now, and this is so important for moms. I think it's so important you don't need to do everything at the same time. Some women manage, you know, but for some women it's totally fine. My son is now nine you and now I'm. He's so independent and now, without any feeling of bad conscience or I'm losing some, you know I'm missing something. I can do all the other things yeah, I love that, thank you. 

Lara 

Well, and I think that's a perfect segue into. You said you had 145 interviews of women all around the world about the lessons that they've learned from their mom and, with this being a special episode for Mother's Day, and so many of our listeners have that feeling of how can I be the best mom or what are the lessons that I want to pass on to my children. So, I'd love for you, if you're okay with that, if you could share some of the most important lessons that people you've interviewed talk about with their moms. Is it all women that you interview? It's all women. 

Ana

People ask me why, but you know why? There's a certain energy that happens when it's just us women. We feel it's a safe space for us and I want to keep it that way yeah, I love that so what are some of the most important lessons that daughters have taken away from their mothers? 

I want to start by saying one of the biggest lessons in general that came for me out of this is how fascinating it is that we women, as my mom was saying, we go through these certain phases in life. We really live very similar lives and learn very similar lessons and teach very similar lessons.

On the outside, we may be a farmer in a mountain in Nepal I had a guest like that as well or, you know, a renowned psychologist from Switzerland, and then you hear these stories and lessons and they're the same lessons and the stories are very. Women's lives often go through these very, very similar paths and this is something for me that was so groundbreaking to understand this that how connected we are you know how, how you're not connected we are and if we understood that and felt this bond strongly, I think we could be even more powerful and empower each other much, much stronger. We do live the same life, this one woman's life, and that's fascinating.

 So, it's amazing that women from all these different countries and situations talk about same lessons. You know, that's beautiful and absolutely the most important thing that many women mention. Mind you, I have to say I have many guests who had very complicated relationships, to put it gently with their moms. So, it's not only glorifying moms and it's not this. This information doesn't come from women who just said the amazing, you know, supportive moms we have, and these are some of my favorite guests, the ones who had really difficult experiences with their moms but still managed to distill lessons out of out of those. 

But so, the main and most important thing is to be this is what my, my guests say is that when their moms were kind of cheerleaders, you know, when they were supportive, when they were the source of support and self-confidence and courage. And moms, when a mom tells you just go after your dreams and nothing stands in your way this is one of my favorite quotes nothing stands in your way, but you yourself. Women really appreciate and it means so much to them when their moms work, their cheerleaders, their support system. They're pouring this courage into them and not allowing them to have doubts and self-criticism and things like that. 

Another thing that's very important is resilience. Women very often say talk about these lives of their moms all over the world, and when they start thinking and articulating this, they are in awe of our mother's lives and strength and resilience, and that's important. I think this is so important to remind, be reminded how strong we are and resilient we are and we women. Talking to all these women, I learned that we are so much stronger and more powerful than we are raised to believe. You know we come from these thousands of years of women being stay at home, caring, but there is so much strength in here. We are so powerful and strong and resilient. So that's something women very often mention, no matter where they come from. 

One of my favorite lessons is be independent, and that especially means financial independence. And again, this comes from women, from any different situation and status and culture. You need to be independent. You need to be, no matter how loving your marriage is and partnership, how important it is to have some source of income or profession, both financially but also practically, mentally, you know, to know that you're your own person and that where you are right now is your choice. This is so important. One of my favorite lessons which I learned from my who, after a long pause, completely reinvented herself at 62 and decided enough of her being in front of the camera. She wants to be a director and at 62 she bought a camera and made a documentary, kind of a documentary collage about her life and her real life versus the life on screen, and she made, created such a beautiful movie that she started winning a new round of awards and going to international festivals in her 60s, for you know incredible, and this is a lesson I hear very often that matters so much to me. 

It's never too late it's never too late. 

And I hear so often about this second act. Some, some women, call it or, you know, later stages of life. Women tell me my mom has never been happier. You know, she entered her 60s. She was divorced, widowed, and stayed married. Something went through so many challenges in life and she's never been happier. And this, I love this lesson, because a it allows me to dream that I could still become whatever I want one day in my 60s as well, if I want to, but be that there's joy to find in aging. You know that it's not. It's beautiful to hear that, and my mom kept saying that and I remember what the last interview she gave for Croatian TV in her 60s, she said the same thing. She said I've never been happier in my life, and you could see it. She was like a sun, you know, glowing sun, and that is so important, so important to keep in mind. And I just want to mention this one because this one is also huge. 

So, women go and talk about their mom so often, about how caring their moms were and loving, and they took care of everybody in the family, and they took care of the grandparents and children and, you know, in-laws and spouses and animals and everybody. And mom was so full of love, and she was always there for us. And I am very embarrassed to admit this. Only recently I started digging into the shadowy side of this, you know, into the dark. Dark because I read this beautiful book mother-daughter puzzle, in which Rosjke Hasseldine, who is a therapist and works with mother-daughter relationships, she talks about this culture of female service and I never really thought about this and realized that it's as beautiful as it is that we women are so caring and loving and always take care of everybody else. It is vitally important that we keep the balance and take care of ourselves. 

Yes, and because many of my guests said, you know, I wish mom took better care of herself, because then she would be happier and healthier and that would make me happy. Like what's the use of a mom who burns out after 30 years of just taking care of everybody else and then she ends up, you know, immobile and sick and in bed and then the kids have to take care of her. So, this is a very interesting lesson. Again, women repeat it from everywhere in the world oh, mom was so caring and loving. And now I started poking, now that I've learned and read about Rosjke's theories about this service of female culture. Now I start talking to them about the other side of. Was it too much? Did mom ever take a break? Did she ever take care of herself? What does it mean, you know? So, this is very, very important. 

Lara 

And we talked about that on the when you had interviewed me about how I was so impressed that my mom did do things for herself, like she did have a career, and that was very uncommon for the neighborhood, for the religious culture that I grew up in, and when I was younger I actually had a hard time with it. But now, as a as an older woman and as a mom now of kids, I it was like one of the best lessons she could have taught me absolutely, absolutely same here. 

Ana

Yeah, I'm here, you know, when you're a teenager or younger and you're like, oh, everybody gets I don't know warm dinner every single night and I don't you know. Or I don't have a sandwich in my school bag. And now I look back I'm like, oh my god, I learned. 

Lara 

I learned so much. 

Ana

She gave me so much more important than a sandwich in my school bag, you know completely. 

Lara 

So, I think that brings up such a very important point that we had talked about is we never want to put women on this pedestal, say that they're perfect or you have to be the perfect mom. There are a lot of lessons that we indirectly learn from our mothers or things that we wish they would have taught us or had done differently. So, can you speak to some of those that you have learned interviewing all of these women? 

Ana

So, I this is my favorite question at the end of the interview, I always ask what do you wish? Was there anything important your mom was not able or just didn't teach you? Something important that you learned by yourself, and you wish your mom had taught you? Because I really want my listeners to get the information about. What can I do better? You know, what do women wish to have learned? Most often, the? The answer is sex. Our bodies, female bodies, as one of my one of my guests said. I wish she told me about sex, so I didn't have to go through so much trial and error. That was yeah, we don't want. 

Lara 

We don't want to go through trial and error in this room. 

Ana

Yeah, so women are really and it's interesting women say I know, maybe my mom was religious or maybe she just came from a culture that never talked about this, maybe it's the generational thing, but I wish if she wasn't able to teach me and talk to me about it. I wish she had found a person or told me where to go for guidance, or at least a few guests said, at least if she gave me a pamphlet or a book or you know a website nowadays any kind of guidance, so that again we didn't have to go through trial and error. But also, about our own bodies, about female bodies. You know we need to talk to our daughters about what it means to have a woman's body and how to take care of it and what is normal and whatnot, and also you know where the boundaries are and things like that. So, this is absolute number one. 

Lara 

I would not have guessed that I would not have guessed that as the number one thing how interesting is that? 

Ana

Yeah, this is why it's so important. 

Lara 

And then you think about it and it's like, of course you know, of course I think we talk about menstruation and periods very high level, but then to talk about even just like, the sexual pleasure side of things, and that that's still a right that we have and I think sometimes we really dismiss that. So that's still a right that we have, and I think sometimes we really dismiss that. 

Ana

So that's a that's incredible to hear that so important. Yeah, and you know, as I had, I had guests, I mean, we covered so many topics. We talked about abuse and things like that, and women say I wish I knew what the boundaries are, what, what you know that my mom taught me. My body is my body and how, what is okay and what's not okay. We really have to talk to our daughters about this and our sons. The absolute number two is finances. So many women say I wish my mom taught me about finances. You know how to save, how to do a checkbook, how to invest or you know financial literacy in general. Obviously, women do not talk to their children, especially their daughters, about finances. 

Self-confidence and this is so interesting because then we get deeper into this comes so often and I often hear my mom was so self-confident, but she didn't teach me how to be self-confident and through all these conversations we'll learn that it's actually very hard to teach somebody to be self-confident. 

But I think this goes back to the first lesson I mentioned, where if your mom is a big cheerleader of yours and if she keeps telling you can do this and you're amazing and you're, that definitely boosts self-confidence. You know that's definitely, but when it doesn't exist, women really, really miss that. And then finally, women so often say and now we're going back again, it's nice how we're running full circles now, self-care, you know to take care of yourselves. And very often women say I watched my mom, my mom. The last interview I did, the woman said yet again my mom never sat down. I never saw my mom sit down and I wish she modeled to me that it's okay to take a break and to do something else and to take care of myself. So, this is what women really, really wish their mothers would model them and teach them to take care of themselves and to take, you know, to be gentle with themselves. 

Lara 

I think that's a really good point there that I hear so often in listeners and clients that they feel guilty when they take a break, but then to hear the opposite side that that's what their daughters wish that they did and if anything that can help, you know, give us that that longer, longer term perspective that maybe right now your kids are asking you of things, but down the road when you sit and take a break, that's one of the best lessons that your daughters want to learn. 

Ana

For two reasons, as we said. One is so you don't break down, because what's the use of you being an amazing mom was taking care of everything while the kids are very little and then when they're teenagers, you know, falling down like you know something. I had a few guests whose mom then got very ill and my guest said I wish she took a better care of herself because, if you know, she ended up burning out and becoming ill and she couldn't, you know, support us when later in life or they even passed away and they weren't there. 

So, you really have to think about the fact that we are here for the long run. You know. You have to be healthy and well to support these people throughout their lives and not just when they're little a and you really have to model both your daughter and your son as well. 

I have a son and I'm teaching him that it's okay that a woman, you know, takes a break or that the woman doesn't do everything in the house that the men can help. It's we need to model. We have to be aware that the way we are behaving is that's what we're modeling to these new generations and this is how they will expect to be treated or treat their spouses, and we're modeling to these new generations and this is how they will expect to be treated or treat their spouses, and we really want to be conscious about this yeah, and I grew up in a home where that was the norm, where my parents were incredible partners. 

Lara 

It was very different for their generation and then I couldn't ever understand what people were talking about when, like, yeah, we're talking about, until I got you know out of, and I saw more you know families and I started looking around thinking like what just happened. 

Like why are your dads not cooking? It's very odd to me, like so it was. It was very eye-opening when I did see that and it was scary because I realized that that is, that is the norm for a lot of people and that's it broke my heart really, and so I love that. You know you bring that up here, that, moms, it's okay for you to take a break. It is okay for you to practice self-care and not just waiting until there's time to do it. 

Ana

It's there's never time to do it. If you're single and live alone, you know there's always something to do. There's never. You need to create time. 

Lara 

Yeah, it just becomes non-optional in my mind even if it's small things. 

Ana

You know many guests tell me my mom would. This one lady said my mom would. Just every day after dinner or lunch or something, she would say now I need my time for myself, she would go to the bedroom and they knew for the next 10-15 minutes, nobody's disturbing mom. You know it can be little, it doesn't need to be big things. You don't need to disappear to a yoga retreat, it can be these, little, little steps. For me Sometimes it's just making myself a cup of tea. I love tea and I do my little tea ceremony and I sit down, and I enjoy my tea in this beautiful cup, and you know it can be little things, yeah, and, and you know, full circle. 

Lara 

That brings us back to when you're doing the things that bring you joy. That's also self-care, you know like really being able to find that thing, whether that's a career, a hobby, writing, yeah and that really can be so self-giving, I think, for every woman. 

Ana

Yeah, I had an interesting interview where my guest said exactly that. She said I wish my mom went back to work because we all felt like she would have been a much happier person, you know, and fulfilled. So, it doesn't taking care of yourself, as you said, doesn't necessarily mean meditating. It can mean go back to the office. Yep, it's totally fine if that makes you a happy, fulfilled person and you come home and you know you tell your kids about this awesome thing you're doing fantastic yes, yeah. 

Lara 

Is there anything else that you want to share with the listeners as we wrap up? 

Ana

No, I think we've really covered it all. I can't think of anything. 

Lara 

It's been so fun. I really think we're going to have to do this again, because we have to start a new podcast, so we can just talk forever. Where can people find you online, your podcast, all of the above. 

Ana

My podcast is called Thank you, mama, and it can be found everywhere. Wherever you find your podcasts on YouTube as well, I have a website called tajder.com, I guess you have episode notes because spelling is tricky and also, I'm on Instagram, on Facebook, pretending to be on Twitter, which is not really but Instagram and Facebook are my favorite places to hang out with. 

Lara 

I'll make sure I link to all of them so they can find you, okay, thank you. Well, thank you, it was great talking to you. 

Ana

This was so much fun. Thank you. 
 
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