44: The power of networking for POC & First Gens

As a person of color (POC) and/or first-generation professional, your family’s culture and background likely influenced your beliefs, which can now impact your making a career change.

Dani Tan is a leadership and career coach, who works with POC and First Gens who are often the first, few or only in their space. Dani reveals how the scarcity mindset from our parents can affect our career choices. And she shares how the power of networking can reset our thinking. 

Dani, who is Asian Latina and first generation, also teaches us how to let go of some career lessons we learned as kids. And, we tackle guilt, that overwhelming feeling that can keep POC and First Gens from making a career switch. 

Episode Highlights:

• Common career-change fears for POC and First Gens
• How the scarcity mindset of your parents affects your career choices
• Why networking is especially important for POC and first-generation professionals
• Building a community of role models, mentors, sponsors and allies
• How networking can quiet the fears of making a career change
• Highlight Reel and Words of Empowerment exercises to tackle self-doubt
• Connecting with other POC and first-gen professionals
• Dealing with guilt about wanting to change careers
• Releasing “survival mode” to find a new career that'll make you happy
• Highlighting those skills that make you special as a POC and First Gen
• Letting go of the “put your head down and just work hard” mentality

Find Dani Tan at:
Website: https://www.danitan.com/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dani-tan/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danitani/
Podcast: The Pivot and Promotion Podcast

LinkedIn Groups for POC:

Latina Professionals

Latino Professionals

National Association of Asian American Professionals

Asian American Professionals and Leaders Network

The Black Professionals Network

Black Leaders Worldwide

Resources:
National Career Development Association: Understanding the Needs of First-Generation Professionals 

Music credit: TimMoor from Pixabay

Podcast info:
What's your career switch? What do you think about this episode and the show? Tell us at careerswitchpod.com. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

Transcript

Lixandra: Hi, everyone. I'm Lixandra Urresta, and this is Career Switch Podcast. This show is here to encourage you to take action with whatever career change you're considering or working on. Maybe you're trying to switch industries or professions or break out on your own and start a business. In some episodes, I talk to people who've made their own career switch, whether by choice or circumstance. They share the good, the bad, and the truth about their journey, including what worked for them and what didn't. In other episodes, I speak with experts who offer their best career advice on challenges that can come up during the process of making a career change. After all, it takes guts to switch things up, and it's not easy. However, it is possible. 

So, I hope you hear something in this episode, an idea, a suggestion, a piece of advice that'll spur you into action with your own career switch, whether it's taking that first bold step or trying something new. Welcome. I'm glad you're here. 

This episode of Career Switch Podcast hits close to home for me. I am a woman of color and I am first generation. I've been wanting to do an episode that focuses on people of color and first gens because we are in a unique situation. While many of us may have grown up in the U.S., our family's culture and background likely influenced our beliefs, which can now impact our making a career change. 

My guest today is Dani Tan, a leadership and career coach. She works with people of color and first-gen professionals who are often the first few or only in their space. In this episode, Dani reveals how the scarcity mindset from our parents can affect our career choices. She shares how building a community through networking can reset our thinking. Dani also teaches us how to let go of some career lessons we likely learned as kids. Plus, we tackle guilt, that overwhelming feeling that can keep people of color and first gens from making a career switch. 

Hi, Dani, thanks for joining us today. Let's dive in. I'm really excited about today's episode. I'm Latina. My parents are from Ecuador, and I am the first in my family to be born and educated in the U.S. and to have a corporate career. I've been wanting to do an episode like this since season one. I just had to find the right career expert and I'm so happy that we met and that we're collaborating now. 

So, Dani, you're Asian Latina, you're also first gen, and you work with career changers. So you understand this topic from both perspectives. First, tell us about yourself and what you do as a leadership and career coach

Dani: A little bit about me. I am a leadership and career coach, primarily for women of color. I help those who are the first, few or only in their space that are ready to pivot careers, get promoted, expand their leadership skills or find their voice. So over the last like decade plus I've worked on my pivot and promotion skills to become the first gen Asian Latino leader that I am today. And what I really did was I learned how to turn conversations into job opportunities, which let me change careers into multiple industries, which was like PR, sales, merchandising, e-commerce, you name it, while achieving 11 promotions, 11 years. And I did that because of the power of networking. And so what I do is I use that with my clients who are the first year only in their space, because they typically are first gen, women of color who are the first ones there. So what I do is I work with them and I coach them on How can we build a network of sponsors, mentors, or allies in order to help you feel more visible, represented in the spaces that you're in to either break into a new industry or accelerate yourself within your current career?

Lixandra: And I just want to point out that what we're talking about today applies to both men and women, even though most of your clients are women. For sure. So what kind of issues come up when your clients who are people of color and or first generation want to make a career change?

Dani: The biggest thing that comes up first is, okay, I think I can break into this new industry. And I'm nervous to break into that new industry, one, because I'm not sure if I have experience and two, because I don't want to leave the job that I currently have that I have built a reputation in or has given me security, or has given me stability. So that's usually the big First thing I have to face, especially for first gen, right. They've been raised by parents or an environment or by relatives that were like more so in a scarcity mindset of maybe they just immigrated to this country and they were trying to just get food on the table and pay the bills. And now they've opened up these opportunities for their children and the, and while they grow up, they're like, okay, just get a job. That's more conventional traditional that, you know, you're going to be safe and secure. You know, I've had clients who were like, I was told to be a nurse. I was told to be an accountant because those were more surefire things, but maybe they weren't aligned with what they wanted to do. So once they kind of follow those paths and they kind of wake up and they're like, wait a minute, other people are like way more excited to go to their jobs than I am. How do I break into this new role that I'm more interested in, whether it's, you know, retail or even customer experience, anything. And they kind of come to me saying, okay, I don't know what to do and how to make this move because I'm so secure where I currently am. So for me, it's basically breaking it down for them. Uh, you can be secure in this new path. It's okay if you don't have experience there. Let's create these tools by collecting data and creating data by having conversations with folks who either have made similar moves or are currently in those spaces who can help ground you and say, you know what, it's okay. You don't have experience in X, Y, and Z program or software because you can actually learn that on the job. Or, you know what, I also made this move and these are the steps that I took to get there, or these are the workshops that I took, or these are the trainings that I, you know, had to attend. And so really breaking it down because. We grow up in different environments and we're conditioned different ways and we have different belief systems. So it's to figure out, OK, out of those beliefs, what can we kind of help see of? Yeah, that's, you know, actual. Maybe there will be a blocker or maybe this is a block that we can kind of remove with time.

Lixandra: I can definitely relate to growing up with that expectation to have a stable job with a steady income, definitely white collar right at an office, but preferably doctor, lawyer, engineer. Those were the three career choices that I grew up with. So yeah, I was like, I'll be a doctor. I went to a high school that had a pre-med program, which now looking back, I don't agree with. I think high schools should be as broad as possible. Agree. You shouldn't be so focused at such a young age. And then I went to college thinking I'll be a bio major and go to med school. But once I got to college, I realized that whole career was not for me. And feel free to share how you grew up, especially with the Asian side versus the Latina side.

Dani: Mm-hmm. So, um, on one side of my family, I'm Filipino and Chinese. The other side of my family, I'm Puerto Rican. So on the Asian side, a lot of Filipinos are in the medical field, especially nursing. And so I was given some, some notes of you should become a nurse. You should go into medicine. You know, nurses do amazing things. Being a doctor is an amazing thing. You always will be needed, right? We saw that clearly in the last few years, especially. But I was like, I've never, ever had the desire in my soul to become a nurse or be in that field. While I appreciate so much of what they do, I just don't feel like I have the capacity to do that. And then even on the Latina side, right, I wanted to be a teacher growing up. And I was told they don't make the best salaries. I don't know if you should be a teacher, but it was the fact of on this side, Hey, you want to make sure you have a job that has a hefty salary that will take care of you. So you're not struggling. And on the other side, yeah. Do something that you know is like safe and secure and you don't have to think about it and you'll always be in need. Right. So those were definitely two scarcity mindsets of. Get that paycheck and get that paycheck.

Lixandra: So yeah, no, you got it from both sides. That's tough. So like you were saying, you focus on networking. Why is networking especially important for people of color and first gens?

Dani: Representation really, really, really does matter. Having role models matter. Visibility matters. And when there is a lack of representation in leadership or C-suite roles, It's hard to picture and visualize what is possible as a first gen or person of color. It's just harder because you're like, that person doesn't look like me. Maybe that's not attainable then for me. So I will say this time and time again, I love to break it down. Breaking it down by either finding the few that are industry leaders in those spaces that you want to be in and building relationships with them so they can help say, Hey, I know this seems like scary and unattainable because you don't see that many of us. but I've made it, and so can you, and here's the path I got to get here. Also just finding those who are in those spaces, who could be allies, who could be sponsors, right? Because we don't need to, and we really can't do it alone, because even when you're making your way and you're breaking your way through, you have to have allies and sponsors in those rooms to help support you, champion you, be there with you, so that way you don't feel like you're alone. And it's super, super important because when you're first gen, you're the first. It's in the name, right? And when you're a person of color, it's the same thing. The stats are the stats. And that's just how our presentation currently is. And so in order for us to break through, you really have to build that network of support. And it can seem scary and overwhelming, but just know it's just having a conversation and saying hello and do what comes naturally for you. That's what I always tell my clients. I don't want you going out there in a room and like passing out business cards if that's like definitely not your jam. Like just figure out a way that you want to connect with someone because you're truly interested in what they do and you want to do it too. That's all it comes down to.

Lixandra: I think also a lot of us grew up without role models. Just recently, I was talking to a colleague who's fourth generation Mexican-American and she was sharing that her grandmother was a VP at a bank and the career advice that she got from her grandmother. And I was like, oh my gosh, my grandma had no education and she was a maid. And my parents, my mom finished high school, my dad did not. And when they came to the U.S., they simply started working in factories. So I just started imagining what if my parents or grandparents had been professionals? Right. It would have just given me so much exposure. Yeah. So is that another reason why networking is so important for people of color and first gens to expose ourselves to other professionals?

Dani: For sure, definitely. Role models are so, so, so important because it really helps you see what's achievable, but also they're there to give you advice and guidance on the experiences that they went through. Right. Because it's not all going to be rainbows and butterflies, there's going to be some adversity, there's gonna be hard times, there's gonna be biases that we don't like, right. But to have role models there who have kind of gone through it and can help say, hey, this is how I navigated, this is how I went through it. And I've been in your shoes makes it so much easier, at least more achievable for us. And so I totally can relate. Within my family, no one was going through corporate America trying to climb up. I'm in my day job, a VP of a global company. And I didn't have the role models or tools there whatsoever to help me with that. Even when it came to college, my direct parents did not finish college. So I'm first generation to graduate college as well as first generation to be raised in the US. So even when it came down to things of applying for financial aid, I had no idea what that was. I was figuring it out. For applying for colleges, I had no idea there were deadlines or that I had to go see them. And of course, like they try to do their best. But when you're in it on your own, you're just kind of like treading water. And when you have a role model, there's like, hey, okay, this is the steps that I did in order to get there. It just makes it so much easier. So think about, you know, the folks who do have those role models in their immediate life. They're going through corporate America, bold, confident. And that's what we have to try to build for ourselves if we don't have it. And that's why I'm always like, Where are your role models? Where's your network? Where are your sponsors? Where are your allies? You don't have it? That's okay. Let's build it. Let's build it and create it because you have that for a lifetime.

Lixandra: Yes, yes, exactly. We don't have to do it alone. Your story takes me back to when I was applying to college and I too had to apply and fill out the financial aid forms by myself. So yeah, we may have had to do things on our own when we were younger, but it's never too late to start building that network.

Dani: Yeah, it's, it's never too late. And another word that I use, if like networking seems like really structured is like building a community. And the thing is it's going to change, right? Because we're going to evolve and change depending on what year it is, what season it is. So we talk about career pivots, right? Depending on where you are in your career, you might have changed what your industry is two times, three times. You might have changed what, you know, company you're in or what roles you're interested in, and that's okay. Your community will also evolve to help reflect that in order to help support you. So it's not always going to be the same. It'll constantly evolve.

Lixandra: Yeah, that makes sense. Okay, Dani. So for your clients who are looking to make a career change, how do you help them network?

Dani: So the first thing we do is we identify what their goal is. So let's say, you know, they're looking to break into a brand new industry. Maybe they are in a less technical field and they're going to break into a tech space and they're concerned about, you know, different softwares they want to use, or if they didn't have a certificate in a certain form of education. So the first thing I say is, ok, what are the jobs that you're interested in? Let's look and identify what are those job descriptions like? What are those roles and responsibilities currently in within those job descriptions? And how, if you were to look at your current role and responsibilities and your experience of what you have, where does it overlap and not overlap? Great. Now understand what overlaps and where are the gaps. And there's going to be gaps, and that's totally OK. Now the next thing is, is to identify people who are currently in the job that you want to have. So that way you can have conversations with those who are actually doing the parts of the job descriptions that you're looking at and the jobs that you're targeting. Now you're just going to outreach them and say, Hey, I love that you are an X role at X company and X industry. I'm currently in this space. I'm looking to break in. I'd love to chat for 20 minutes to learn about how you like your experience. 

So, that's just an initial conversation. And then they're chatting with anyone who's in that role to tell them about what their experience is, what they're looking to break into. And then that person can share insight and say, it sounds like you have skills in x, y, and z based on what you shared. And it looks like you're worried about these gaps. Here's how I would advise you to fill these gaps. That way you're trying to collect data, not just from going online and searching, but actually talking to people who are in those experiences who can help you and say, that gap's not a big deal, you'll learn on the job, or this gap you can fill by taking this general assembly class, for example. And that way, you can get it for more than one person at either companies you're interested in or industries you're interested in, roles you're interested in. So you can kind of understand and hone in on, OK, where do I want to focus? And then once you start to really focus on that role that you're looking to break into, you can then start to identify leaders or hiring managers in those roles and having conversations with them. Because now you've understood what qualifications you have, what qualifications you either need to achieve. And then you can have really educated conversations with those who are more so stakeholders or in power of hiring to help have those conversations and say, hey, this is where I'm at. I have these gaps, but I filled them either this way or I'm looking to fill them this way. I'm excited to break into this industry. I've talked to some people. This is what it looks like I need. These are the skills that I have that transfer over. Tell me, what are you looking for for the ideal candidate for your team? And then they'll go in and they'll be able to start evolving those conversations to turn them ideally into job referrals.

Lixandra: That's a great networking strategy. And Dani, when we first spoke, you brought up how that scarcity mindset that many of us grew up with can trigger fear and uncertainty when making a career switch. But that networking can quiet those fears. Tell us about that.

Dani: Self-doubt may start to creep up, right, of, can I do this? Should I do this? And so when you're having these conversations, it's helping to quiet down those fears versus you trying to play out the scenarios as to why it won't work in your mind. You're having conversations with those who are living the experience and in the role and can help say, yeah, no, it's achievable. It's able, it's able to be done. And I always say like, you want to make sure you're talking to the people who have actually done what you want to do. 

The other thing that I always say is like, if you're starting to question like your skillset, because sometimes we go into the mode of, well, I should just be grateful for what I have. And I don't know if I'm, you know, good enough and maybe I don't have X, Y, and Z. I always say you should do two exercises. And one exercise is I call it the highlight reel. So it's listing out. 20 accomplishments that you've done throughout your career. And folks are like 20. And I'm like, you can find 20. So it's, it's a slightly painful exercise in the sense of you need to just sit down and comb through your current role or your past roles, even if it's outside of your roles, right, even if it's in volunteer work, or if it's in what you do for the community. of what are 20 things that you have accomplished that are like, wow, dynamite. I have done these because that is your list that you need to look back to when you're having self-doubt of your abilities of, hey, let me check in like with what I've accomplished. Wow. You know, I've done X, Y, and Z to help move the needle for this project, for this company, for this team. And it's a good reminder because we're so busy of do, do, do, do, do, get to the next thing, get the next thing, get to the next thing, achieve, achieve, achieve. that we forget to sit in the things that we've already done. 

The second exercise I have my clients do, which I've actually done this exercise too, and it's very grounding, is to ask anywhere from like 10 to 15 people to give you three words that they would describe you. It can be professional, personal, it doesn't matter. Say, hey, shoot a text, mass text, mass email, whatever works. Can you give me three words that you would use to describe me? That's it. And then they'll start to come in. And I like to have my clients put it into a Google Sheet so you can start to see, OK, what are the commonalities? Oh, everyone sees me as a leader. Everyone sees me as ambitious. Everyone sees me as driven. And there are things that you may not perceive or see yourself as, right? But then when you see that net out there, and there's a majority of these words that are being used to describe you, it's a very, very empowering and a great reminder when you're going and having these conversations, because they can be discouraging at times, right? You're going to try to make connections, and not every single person is going to say, yeah. And that's okay. You have to just kind of go back to your highlight reel and your words of empowerment for yourself of wait a minute now. I'm great. I'm amazing. Look at all these things that I've done. I will find someone out there who can see that within me because I already have an entire community that does.

Lixandra: Thanks for those exercises. I'm working on networking within the podcasting industry now, and yeah, I have found that networking is definitely a numbers game. You certainly have to contact more people versus the number who respond. Do you encourage your clients to connect with other people of color on LinkedIn and to join organizations like Latina Professionals, which you're a part of?

Dani: I highly, highly encourage, it's, it's a part of my coaching that you reach out on LinkedIn to professionals that inspire you, whether they're people of color, whether they're not. Even if you just send a connection request and in the note, you say, just wanted to connect with an amazing, you know, leader, or if there have an identifier in their bio or in their headline that says first gen or Latina leader saying, I just want to meet with a Latina leader because that's how they're identifying. Or I want to meet with a first gen industry expert. If you drop that stuff in, it's not only just creating a connection, but you're creating a connection that really is linking the two of you together. 

And I think joining organizations, yeah, so I host every single Wednesday on LinkedIn Live, Latina Career Connect for Latina Professionals, and it's different 30-minute workshops on how to do career development. It's community building, right? It's creating a space where you can come in and learn something, but you can also find more folks who are trying to develop and grow the same way you are. So no better place to network than to go into organizations and spaces like that, where you can hop on and build connections and see what everyone else is asking and figuring out. And it really helps with like not feeling alone and feeling like, okay, I'm part of a community. I have a support system. this person has similar problems and similar questions, maybe I should reach out to them and just talk to them and we can kind of work together on it.

Lixandra: And are some of the topics tailored to people of color and first gen?

Dani: Definitely. So I cover topics like salary negotiation, because as we know, the pay gap is large, but especially large for Latinas and women of color. That's a big one. Another one that I cover is how to be a leader at any level, because as we know, there is a small representation of Latina leaders in the C-suite. So showing how you can have the tools and strategies to be a leader, no matter what level you're at, whether it's entry level, middle management, and how to take that in order to help accelerate you in your career, because That's how we're going to get up, right? We have to have the tools. And of course, also how to identify mentors and sponsors is a really important workshop because as we've talked about, right, you have to have those allies, those sponsors, and those mentors that also are not people of color who are in those rooms who can help champion you and get to you where you need to go. And that is a really big key.

Lixandra: Great. All right. So let's dive into another big topic that has come up with many of my friends who are also first gen. Feeling guilty about wanting to make a career change. So I was talking to a South Asian friend who's married with kids and she's been in her industry her entire career and she's reached a point where she just wants to try something new. She was saying how guilty she feels because she has a good job. She has that stable income that her parents instilled in her. She's college educated. She has a master's. So she's done it all, but she's unhappy. She wants to just basically switch things up with her career, but she feels so guilty. Do you come across that? Do your clients feel guilty about wanting to make a career change?

Dani: We could do a whole episode on guilt. Yes. Guilt is something that comes up a lot with my clients. I mean, I've experienced it myself. Right. So we kind of talked about depending on, you know, being first gen, being a person of color, what your, you know, family's story is, if they, you know, came and immigrated to the U S and how your upbringing was. There are so many different things that come into just feeling grateful for the fact that you have a job, just feeling grateful for the fact that you have health insurance and a paycheck and all those things we should feel grateful for, right? But the thing that comes is there's this layer of guilt, be grateful for what you have. So then you feel guilty if you want something else, or if you want something more, or what you have, you feel like it's just not the right thing for you anymore. 

So we have this guilt, okay, well, If I change jobs, what if I don't make as much money? What if I decide to go into entrepreneurship and it doesn't pan out because it's unconventional or nontraditional from what I was raised to understanding of a more traditional job. 

So all these like layers of guilt start to come up of, well, then I should just stay put to where I'm at and I should just be okay with what I have. But I think the most important thing is take inventory with ourselves. And what is most important to me right now? What do I value right now? And is my life and my job reflecting that? Sometimes we're going to have a job because we know right now this season, I just want to make sure I'm paying my bills and I'm comfortable and I'm putting money away for, you know, my future child's education or whatever it might be. And that's OK. But then there might be a time that comes up where you're like, you know what? That served me for that many years. But now at this time in my life, where, you know, I'm further along, maybe I want something that gives me a little bit more joy. But for example, maybe it doesn't bring me as much income in, but that's OK, because I know I'm comfortable to do that. And it's OK to make that change, too. So it's kind of just evaluating what do you really need? What do you value? What's important to you? And is everything aligned with that? And if not, what can I kind of lean into to do that? So that way you're less thinking about the guilt of past lives, if that makes sense.

Lixandra: Yeah, I think the guilt also stems from what you said about bringing us joy. That wasn't part of the equation for a lot of us growing up. Again, many of our parents lived on what we call survival mode, where it was just about getting to that point where you were financially stable. So when it came to getting an office job, it was just a matter of having that good job with a steady paycheck. And that should be enough. And you should be grateful. I don't remember any talk about being happy.

Dani: Yeah, I totally agree. No one was like, oh, OK, you should be a nurse because it's going to make you happy. Or they were like, yeah, you're going to be taken care of. It's going to be good. Or, you know, you should go into accounting because it's going to make you happy. No, it was very much about survival mode of make sure you have money coming in so you're safe and secure. And there's a part where we can release. It's okay. We have to reassure ourselves that it's safe to start to release survival mode because we're at a different part of a path in life than our parents, because our parents did that work for us. Right. And that's the mode that they were in. And so now it's like, okay, thank you. I appreciate that. But I can kind of start to move past that and evolve in a different way and start to seek out things that do bring me happiness and joy. because they did the work for us in order to be able to do that, right? And you did the work for yourself, too, or we did it for ourselves, too. At a point in our career, we probably were in survival mode, and now we've gotten to a point where we're like, oh, wait, I don't need to do that as much anymore. I can kind of start to follow what makes me happy.

Lixandra: Yeah, I like that, that we can release that survival mode because we inherited it. Yeah. And because of it, we have all these expectations put on us. Honestly, it's a burden to carry. Would you agree that it's sort of like the success of your family sits on your shoulders?

Dani: So I always say like my success was for my survival. So like I needed to be successful in order to survive. I have this line where like I had 11 promotions in 11 years, but the reason why that really was, and I had to reflect back on it was because I was trying to be successful so I could survive. So I didn't have to feel how my parents felt when it came to struggling, living paid at a paycheck or, you know, trying to, you know, make it happen in your career. I didn't want to feel that way. I didn't want to feel this sense of struggle or, you know, stress. So I was like, I need to be as successful as possible so I can escape that. And then what came to be, which is why I would say, like, we have to find a place to release it, is like, you can get here. Huh? Guess what? You kind of abandoned what you needed in order to achieve something that you thought you had to achieve. And then you get there and you're like, wait a minute, I'm not fully happy here. That's why I say like, there's a point where we have to kind of be like, it's okay, I can let you go. You served me and you're the reason why I got to where I got to be. But now maybe I can recalibrate and check in with myself and really start to pursue things that will bring me joy. So it's a good thing. And it's a tough thing, because it's a good thing, because it's really fueled so many amazing people of color first gen leaders, right? Like, You can put any person of color, first person in a situation and they and they can be the best problem solver, the best leader, naturally, because we were we might have been raised like for me, for example, of, I didn't know how to fill out the college applications, I just had to figure it out. or my mom was applying for something and she had questions and she wasn't sure, but I'm there answering the questions, walking her through the steps, right? When in reality, you know, in other families, it might be different where the parents are the ones providing the guidance, but we're the ones that are first gen, depending, maybe your parents' English is their second language. And you were born in the U S and it was your first language. You're the one there who is solving the problems, being the leader, having uncomfortable conversations in rooms of adults. And so that's the thing, right? So it's, it's a tough thing, but it's also a great thing because it's, it's made us who we are. And that's why we're, I, I'm going to say it. We're so special. And so it's learning how to take those special abilities and to hone them. So everyone else can see how amazing we are.

Lixandra: I'm so happy you pointed that out about people of color and first gens. In one of your webinars, you talked about communicating your value. So for career changers, should you highlight those skills that you learned based on your upbringing, for example, figuring things out on your own? Can you say that makes you organized, responsible, I don't know, self-motivated? Because like you said, that makes us special.

Dani: Totally. I mean, I want you to use your tools, your skills, anything that you have that can help highlight how amazing you are, right? I think sometimes we're told to be humble and to be gracious and you can be humble and you can be hardworking, but you don't have to keep your head down, right? You can highlight it because everyone else in the room is highlighting how strong they are. So when you're coming into an interview, show why you're special. Show all of the experiences that you've had and why you are you, right? Because there are so many applications. There are so many resumes. They're looking at everyone and everything. And you don't want to just be cookie cutter of just check marking everything that's on that job description, how you serve it. You want to show how you serve it better and different than everyone else does and why you are the right person for the role.

Lixandra: Yes, being humble. That's something else we were taught, right? Put your head down, work hard, and it'll all pay off. But it doesn't work that way.

Dani: No. I think that's something else that we often shake in a way. Like, yes, be humble, right? Be gracious and be grateful for the things that you have worked towards and achieved. But I think a big thing that comes up with First gen of people of color is just work really hard, keep your head down and your hard work will show what you've done and they will promote you or they will give you a salary increase. And that's actually not the case. Unfortunately, when you're the quiet, hardest working person in the room, all they think is, okay, what else can I, you know, give to this person for them to achieve and get done for us? The person who gets promoted and the person that gets the salary increase is the loudest person in the room. They're the person who is being direct and advocating for themselves to their manager, to their manager's manager about what they're looking for and what they want to achieve. Yeah.

Lixandra: That's saying toot your own horn. It's so true. Especially with a career change. Okay, Dani, we've unpacked a lot in this episode. Really appreciate all your insight and thanks for sharing on how you grew up. Again, this is a topic I've been wanting to cover since season one, so I'm so happy that we connected and were able to do this episode together. Tell us about your coaching services and how listeners can find you.

Dani: I offer one-on-one private coaching for six months, so we meet twice a month on Zoom for an hour and we go through your career goals. What we do is a whole gamut. It could be if you're looking to get a promotion within your current company, if you're looking to change careers and pivot. If you're looking just to become more of a leader. So maybe you were more of an individual contributor and now you're stepping into this leadership role and you want to have the tools to get there. We worked together for six months in order to help achieve that. And I do that through the power of networking. So I help you ground yourself in data of, you know, what are your current skill sets? What do you have? And where are your gaps and what are you trying to fill? And we create a plan to get there. And then we help build out a role model and leadership community for you to help support you with that when you're finding points of difficulty. So if you need to find me, you can find me on my website at dannytan.com. That's D-A-N-I-T-A-N dot com. Or you can find me on LinkedIn.

Lixandra: Yeah. And listeners can also check out your website to join your pivot and promotion email series so they can stay up to date on your workshops, coaching, and partnerships. And one last thing. You said at the beginning that you work primarily with women of color, but can both men and women contact you about coaching?

Dani: I work with anyone, but I always say I work primarily with women of color because we just need to be seen and we need to be identified. But of course, I'm always willing to help everyone. Got it.

Lixandra: Thanks to Dani Tan for being our guest today. You can find Dani on her website, danitan.com and on social media. 

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