The Unseen Barriers to Your Success and How to Overcome Them

Ever wondered if your limiting belief is secretly doing you a favour?

You might be scratching your head, thinking, "Wait, how could this belief that's holding me back possibly benefit me?"

Here's the thing; it will have started out with good intentions, aiming to protect or keep you safe you in some way.

The catch? Well, that purpose might have expired, leaving you stuck in its tracks.

In this episode, I share the unexpected perks of clinging onto these limiting beliefs.

Yep - there can be more to them than meets the eye and often some sneaky advantages hidden in there!

Our beliefs are powerful, they shape our daily decisions, even those we're not consciously aware of.

I'll be sharing some powerful questions that'll help you uncover beliefs you may not even know you have but have been calling the shots.

I also talk out my own journey of turning the tables on my some limiting beliefs, and the magic that happened almost instantly as a result.

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Transcript

Sian 0:25

Hey, and welcome to another episode of the Vibrant Mind Vibrant Life podcast. My name is Sian Hill. I'm your host. And today we are going to be talking about our beliefs. So why is this important? Well, you're probably already aware if you've dipped into the world of personal development, NLP, manifestation, whichever area it may be, that our beliefs play a big factor. They have a big influence in the results that we create. Our beliefs ultimately drive us to do the things that we do. There's the saying from Henry Ford that whether we believe we can or we can't, we're right. So our beliefs really determine what is possible for us or not. This is why it's really important to understand what are the beliefs that we hold? What is it that we think about ourselves and what is possible for us and how is that actually showing up in life? Now many of our beliefs we are consciously aware of in that we know what we think we can or can't do. We know what we think we're capable of or not. So there are those beliefs that we're consciously aware of. But what about those beliefs that are unconscious to us? The ones that we don't necessarily think about on a day to day basis or that we're not even aware of, yet they are the ones that have the most influence because they are the ones that just run on autopilot. They're essentially the Running our mind, our body, our system, and we just follow them without question. They are the ones that you really want to become aware of and check in. Are these beliefs serving me? Are they not? Because here's the thing, right? Beliefs are neither good nor bad. Right, no wrong. They either work for us and serve us and support us, or they don't. They hinder us. So a belief that maybe did serve you a long time ago may no longer be serving you in the same way. By uncovering those beliefs, you can check in and go, right, what is it that needs to shift based on where I am now, based on my life as it stands, and the things that I'm working to, the life that I want to create. Are these beliefs that I hold, are they going to get me there? And if not, then it's an opportunity to change them. Let's talk more than about these unconscious beliefs and how you can begin to Unravel them and discover what they might be. Now, before we do, let me share with you what it was that actually prompted this episode because it was off the back of me uncovering a limiting belief that I had myself that I was completely unaware of but had been really driving my behaviour for quite some time. And although it wasn't serving me, I was getting a benefit from it. Let me elaborate. So, Not long ago, I was making a decision about business. It was a decision about whether to run something, to offer something or not. And every time I thought about it, I could feel myself physically restrict. It was like my, my body would sink into itself. I felt my energy shut down. I was like, right, what is going on? Cause for me, every time something like that happens, it's an opportunity to dig a bit deeper and check in, you know, is it because I don't want to do it? And I'm just thinking that I should, is it that there's a belief getting in the way? Is there some kind of negative emotion? What is it that's blocking me from making a decision, from taking a step rather than kind of pushing it away and seeing it? Oh, well, it's obviously not meant to be, or I don't want to do it right now. It's like, Hmm, this is information whether or not I decide. to go ahead with the thing or not, it's irrelevant. That's just the representation of the block that's within me. So, like I do, I did a bit of digging. I was like, what is going on? And what I discovered from that was a belief that I held that life was a struggle. Like, things have to be hard. And I thought, no, that's interesting. And it explained a lot about some of the experiences that I've been having recently, where usually they would be really easy, and I was finding them a bit of a struggle. And that translated into the to some of the work that I was doing within my business and the everyday stuff. So it was playing out in all areas. So that isn't a belief that I particularly wanted to hold on to. Yet, even the thought of letting it go, I felt like there was some resistance there. So I asked myself some questions, which are the questions that I'm going to share with you today, which are worth considering. Because all of the beliefs that we have, when they're created, when we decided to take that belief on board, there would have been a positive intention for it. Even if that intention isn't serving us right now, it will have served us in some way, shape or form in that moment. Maybe not in a way that we're consciously aware of, yet unconsciously, there would have been a benefit for us creating that belief. Now, it could have been to keep us safe, to protect us, to stop us from getting hurt. So, on some level, in our unconscious mind, whose, by the way, primary role is to keep us safe, to stop us from dying, it would have been a benefit to adopt that belief and take it on board, To maybe stop us from going into the unknown where there's a perceived threat, where we could be judged or feel vulnerable. So there will have been a positive intention for the decision for that belief to be taken on board as being true. And It doesn't mean it is true. Now even the thought that what we believe isn't true can be a bit challenging Because when you believe something, that is the reality that we experience. Our mind looks to prove us right. So when we believe something to be true, our mind will filter through all the information in the external world and bring into our awareness all the ways that it's true. It will show us evidence to support that belief. So when you hold a belief and the world keeps reflecting back at you that this thing really is real, it reinforces itself. So for someone to come along like myself or anybody else and say even though you believe that it isn't true, that can be a bit challenging at times. It can seem a bit confronting because it's like, well, who are you to question that the experience that I'm having isn't real? And the thing I always come back to is, whether it's true or not, is it serving you? And if it isn't, then it's worth considering that there may be an alternative. Now you only have to think about the fact that when you were younger, there will have been things that you believed about yourself, about the world, about life, that you thought were true. Some of those beliefs you probably don't still believe today. Yet back then, you viewed your life through that lens and you lived as though they were true. Today, that's no longer the case. So with that in mind, the beliefs that you have today, does that mean that they'll still be true tomorrow? Not necessarily. Our beliefs can change very, very quickly, particularly when you know how. And that is the work that I do with my coaching clients on my courses is showing people how to change those beliefs, how to release the beliefs that aren't serving And today I want to share with you just a few questions that you can begin asking to bring into your awareness some of the beliefs that you're maybe holding on to and maybe why they're still in place. So these are the questions that I asked myself firstly to uncover the belief that life is a struggle, life has to be hard, and then the questions that followed to dig a bit deeper to find out what may be going on. So let me share them with you. The first thing that I looked at is life felt like a struggle. So the question that I posed to myself was The way that life is, the way I'm feeling right now, that feeling that I have in my body, that restrictive feeling, what would I have to believe to be true in order to feel that way? Let me ask you that again. So what would I have to believe to be true To feel that way, and that same question can be asked about the actual experience that you're having, the physical results that you're getting. So what is it that I would have to believe to be true in order to be creating these results? And you can sit with that for a moment. Give yourself a bit of space to just see what comes to mind. I'm creating this world outside of me, so therefore what is it that I believe that is reflecting this back at me? What has to be true in order for this to be my experience? Once you've got your answer, once you know what the belief is that you're dealing with, I want you then to consider, how do I benefit by holding on to this belief. How is it serving me? Now, your initial response to this question may be, It doesn't benefit me. It's not serving me, child. What are you going on about? It keeps getting in the way. I hate it. I want to let go of it. And I invite you to pause for a moment and just check in, how is it benefiting me? How is this very belief keeping me safe? How is it serving me? And again, see what comes up. Because although it's limiting us in the moment, it will have been created with a positive intention. There's always a positive intention, even if it's not playing out that way. So just check in and see, How is it serving me? What will I lose? I let him go of this belief by letting go of this problem. When I asked myself those questions, I realized that the benefit that I was gaining by holding on to the belief rather than letting go of it was that if I could get through it, if I could work through the struggle and still come out the other end, then I will have proved to myself, I will have proved to the world that I am good enough, that I am worthy of this rather than things just happening with ease. And within that belief was the story that if it hadn't been a struggle, did I really deserve it? So a bit of stuff around feeling worthy was in there, which is interesting because feeling worthy, feeling good enough, these are limiting beliefs that I have let go of in the past many times. And I have been asked the question, so if you've let go of that belief, Sian, then why is it that you have it again? And that's the thing with beliefs is that as you're Moving through life and you experience new events, new circumstances, new people situation. Particularly if you are pushing yourself, if you're stepping outside of your comfort zone, it's gonna bring up new stuff. And it may be that where you were sat previously, you did feel worthy, and then you up level your life, you up level your game, you do something different. And suddenly that belief. That, Oh, I'm not good enough comes back into play because it's, the saying? New level, new devil. And it may be even a deeper layer of that old belief. It's like getting deeper into the unconscious because you're ready for it. Your, your unconscious mind will only ever bring something into your awareness that you are ready to deal with. So when these limiting beliefs come up, rather than almost suppressing them and say, no, that's not true, I'm going to pretend that it isn't an act as though I can do this. Listen, it's a messenger. It's there to tell you these are the things that you need to work through. And consider, how has it been benefiting me? Rather than pushing it away and saying, no, it's rubbish. It shouldn't be here. It's like, right, you've served a purpose. What is it? Tell me, what is it that I gained by holding onto this? And what could I lose by letting go? It may be that that unlocks the very thing that you need to let go of. Not just in one area of life, but in so many. Life being a struggle was playing out in all of the areas for me. And realising that that story doesn't have to be my story. And I got to the point where I'm okay with trusting life and knowing that it can be easy. It doesn't mean that there won't be challenges. It doesn't mean that I won't be pushing myself yet. I can do it with ease. It doesn't always have to be a fight. It can be more like a dance. You're dancing with the universe. And when you dance, there will be times when you're maybe off beat with the music. You trip over your own feet or you're slightly out of time. And that's okay. It's all part of the dance of life. So once you've started to uncover those beliefs, you've found what the benefit may be, what you gain by holding on to them, consider then what would happen if you let them go, what would happen if you decided that that belief was no longer true, it was no longer serving you, and again, you could even sit and write it down and see what comes to mind. Are there perceived negative consequences for not having that belief? Because that may reveal another belief in and of itself. And if the consequences of letting go of that belief are all positive, that's a great way to reassure your unconscious mind that it's safe. It's okay to put that belief down to create a new belief that will serve you. When your unconscious mind knows that it's safe, that regulates your nervous system. You feel okay physically, mentally, and emotionally to go and do the very things that you want to do. Now it may be that that process in and of itself is enough to begin to dissolve that belief, to create a new one. Or it may be that you decide to work with somebody to dig a bit deeper to uncover some of those unconscious beliefs and then use tools and techniques to let them go to create new empowering beliefs. And that is what I did. I used timeline therapy, which is what I use with my clients. It's what I teach to my students to let go of that limiting belief that life had to be a struggle and replaced it with a new empowering belief that life can be fun. Things can happen easily. Now, here's where it gets interesting. I did that of an evening. I woke up the following morning and in my inbox, in my email, there was an email letting me know that I had sold overnight a number of my Essential Foundations of NLP diploma. I had two discovery calls booked, one that had carried out the discovery call and then our client, I've got the other call coming up soon. Later that day, I noticed that I'd sold a number of copies of my book, and there were some other things that happened in my personal life as well, and all of it was really freaking easy! Like, I didn't do anything differently, yet it all felt like it was just flowing, and that's the thing, is that I was showing up anyway, you'll be showing up anyway, you'll be doing the things, you'll be carrying out life, yet if you're doing it with a belief system that is maybe making it hard, maybe putting some resistance in the way, maybe it's not achieving what you want, whatever it is, if there's a feeling there that you're not enjoying, that's an indication that there's probably a belief behind it that isn't serving you. So it's worth investing the time. Cause if you're going to be doing this stuff anyway, why not do it from a place that feels good? You can kind of think about it, like your mind is your home. So it's, it's what, you know, it's what you're familiar with. And sometimes stepping outside of the house can feel a bit scary. You know, this is your safe Haven. And it's the same with your mind. And the thing is, when you're in your house, you can't see your house. You can't see what's outside of it. And just stepping outside of the front door and maybe looking back on it gives you a whole different perspective. You can see bits of your house that you didn't know existed. You can see a garden that maybe you haven't been tapping into. So if you want to understand your mind a bit more, if you want to uncover what those unconscious patterns may be, understand How it is that you're creating the results you are. Where is it that your behavior comes from? Cause it doesn't just happen, right? Your beliefs will be driving your behavior and why is it the goals that you're setting that you really want to achieve? Why is it that you suddenly hit self sabotage? You're not getting there, but you don't understand why. Or if that is of interest to you, then. Check out my Essential Foundations of NLP Diploma. It's a fantastic introduction to the world of NLP, to mindset, along with some really practical tools that you can use straight away to get to know yourself a bit better and begin to make positive changes. And you also get a certificate at the end of it, along with workbooks and action sheets that you can implement into real life, because that's what it's all about. This isn't about having so much information to the point that you almost feel overwhelmed, like, I know what's going on in my brain, but what the fricking hell do I do with it? This is about how do I begin to make changes so that those beliefs begin to shift so that I start to feel differently. And as a result, the life and the way that I experience it is different as well. Have a great week. I'll see you next time.