TOP SECRET - 1984
Directed by Jerry Zucker, Jim Abrahams, and David Zucker
Starring Val Kilmer, Lucy Gutteridge, Peter Cushing, Jeremy Kemp, Christopher Villiers, Warren Clarke, Harry Ditson, Jim Carter, Eddie Tagoe, Michael Gough and Omar Sharif
Genre: Spoof Comedy (Audio clip)
This movie is pure joy! As a critic once noted, "It takes some very smart people to write jokes THIS dumb" and I can't help but agree marveling at the brilliance of the Zucker/Abrams/Zucker (ZAZ) trio which co-directed some of the best comedies of the '80's including this, Ruthless People, and of course Airplane.
I've seen this countless times before and rewatching it again earlier, there were still visual gags that I hadn't caught before like a quick shot of a waiter moving his toupee' during the "Straighten the Rug" musical number....or that there's a pic of a topless model holding up a beaker on this month of Dr. Flammond's Acme Lab Equipment calendar. š¤
This movie is wall-to-wall gags and the cast plays everything perfectly straight. In his first film role Val Kilmer stars as Nick Rivers, a '50's era pop star...I think, the time period this is set in is kept purposely vague which just gives it more leeway for gags. :) Apparently this was meant as a spoof on WWII spy films AND Elvis road comedies AND some other subgenre I can't remember but it really doesn't matter because I would say that 97% of the jokes just land.
And Kilmer does an impressive job with not only the droll delivery of lines such as "Not this Sunday, that's Simcha Torah!" or "I told him I put him on the Montgomery Ward mailing list." but he's great with all of the physical humor and all of the singing and dancing for his musical numbers.
And wHen it comes to those gags, literally NOTHING is off the table from underwater cowboy fights to voice-over jokes to facial deformity gags to even supremely DATED references to stuff like Montgomery Ward or Mel Torme or movies like The Blue Lagoon or The Great Escape which still land even if you donāt get the referencesā¦thereās just such a goofy confidence behind them! Halfway through, thereās even one pretty inspired sequence involving a Swedish librarian played by the late great Peter Cushingā¦.itās filmed entirely BACKWARDS even the dialogueā¦.now apparently this was some riff on a common misperception at a time that speaking Swedish often sounding like speaking BACKWARDS. This goes on for about ten minutes tooā¦.no matter if you get the main joke behind it because everyone involved is just ALL-INā¦ (Audio clip)
When it came to extended ridiculous gags like this, nobody did them better than the ZAZ trio - this film has and always be a true gem, also demonstrating that jokes about Ford Pinto's NEVER get old!
Best Needle drop (best song cue or score used throughout runtime of film):
Now if I had to designate the funniest parody song on this soundtrack, thatās a very easy call and itās the one which opens the movie no less. Just to set the sceneā¦.this is a cold open where we see a board meeting of evil East German military leaders plottingā¦..SOMETHING nefarious involving creating distractions via an upcoming cultural festival and their key distraction is having the American pop star Nick Rivers perform so they pop on his recordā¦.and cut to a truly INSPIRED opening credits sequence taking place mostly on the beach.. (Audio clip)
So YES this is a spot-on parody of ā60ās era Beach Boys pop anthemsā¦.produced by British music journeyman Mike Moran who worked with a EXTENSIVE list of pop stars including Stevie Wonder, Freddie Mercury, Joe Cocker, and Kate Bush. He actually worked on very few movies and the other ones I could find on his IMDBā¦.ECLECTIC to say the least including Death Wish 3 and Time Bandits. The lyrics came from the actual writers of the movie, the ZAZ crew plus Marty Burkeā¦..and the actual singer, why Val Kilmer himself. (Audio clip)
The song is titled āSkeet Surfingā and even beyond the humor of the lyrics, this opening title sequence is just jam-packed with inspired visual gagsā¦..footage of actual dudes on surfboards SHOOTING at skeet, bikiniād women on the beach LAUNCH said skeet, and even some collateral damage from shots being fired into the air including a beach umbrella, nearby hang-glider, andā¦.a prop plane flying overheads. Such a funny, inventive sequence that by the end you might even be telling yourself, āI DO wish they could all be double-barreledā¦.GUNSā¦..ā (Audio clip)
Wasted Talent (most under-utilized talent involved with film):
It makes perfect sense that whenever anyone mentions this movie, the first name which comes to mind is Val Kilmer ā this was his very first movie, he IS the star, and he has gone on to become on our most beloved actors over the past forty years. However, no one seems to mention his co-starā¦.the talented and luminous Lucy Gutteridge who plays Hillary Flammondā¦whatever happened to her? Because sheās FANTASTIC in this movieā¦. (Audio clip)
Well from what I could find, the British actress took on a few more roles in film and TV, but hasnāt done anything since 1994ā¦.she apparently retired and decided on focusing on raising a family which is cool. And apparently she hails from Egyptian royalty too ā her grandfather was Prince Muhammad Said Bey Haim of Egypt and Lucy is a distant cousin of Egyptās last king, Farouk. Well she DOES have a regal quality about her but who knew? Regardless just judging from her performance here, she was an actress who was game for stuff and had genuine chopsā¦.. (Audio clip)
Trailer Moment (scene or moment that best describes this movie):
Now back to the actual on-screen music performances from our hero Nick Riversā¦of which there are several....my favorite being his performance in front of an audience of thousands of SCREAMING East German teenage girls about an hour in. This sequence alone is just proof positive of how when a joke is so good that you just beat it relentlessly into the ground again and again....and how with the right talent pulling it off, it never stops working! :) (Audio clip)
Just shot after shot of teenagers in '50's garb losing their shit while Kilmer croons to them and the scene even takes it further at the end of the performance with Rivers feigning hanging himself, laying down on a railroad track, and sticking his head in an oven (ALL on-stage mind you) while singing that he "just can't go on" without his true love! :o (Audio clip)
MVP (person or people most responsible for the success of this film):
As tempted as I am give this to Val and he is AMAZING in this, so funny and always playing perfectly straightā¦..at the end of the day, this nutty parody truly zips through with a never ending array of visual gags along with pitch-perfect performances from every one involved. And that really DOES come down to the directors who are not only pretty fearless with what they show us but endlessly inventive ā I mean there is ONE shot early on with a German officer picking up a ringing old-school phone which the camera is focused in on and is taking up more than half of the screen. As he walks towards it, we realize that this is NOT a forced perspective shot but infact a REALLY large phone with a receiver thatās larger this head! š Just brilliant ā for co-directing this comic masterpiece, Jim Abrahams, David Zucker, and Jerry Zucker are your Co-MVPās! (Audio clip)
Final Rating: 5 stars out of 5
Look bottom line you might find much of this film stupid, hilarious, or both in equal measuresā¦.me personally I think it REALLY holds up and might even be THE best spoof comedy overall from the team which gave us Airplane and The Naked Gun no less. HIGH praise indeedā¦.Happy 40th Anniversary to this ridiculous gift which just keeps on giving!
Streaming on Netflix
And that ends another SOUVENIRSā¦.NOVELTIESā¦.PARTY TRICKSā¦.review!
