00:00:00

            

Well, hey there. Welcome back. Today we're going to be talking about something really, really important and something that honestly stresses out most people. This time of the year, we're going to be talking about managing food and enjoying the holiday season. Now, this is actually an episode that I aired before, but I feel like the topic is so important that it is worth sharing again, because it is a conversation station.

        

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I have constantly with clients and with friends, and people ask me on social media, so I thought it was worth sharing again. And if you have heard this episode before from over a year ago, I suggest you still listen again, to set you up for success this holiday season while still creating a lifestyle with moderation where you really feel like you get to live and get the best of both worlds. So today I'm going to talk about my three best tips for managing food during the holiday season. And as you already know, the holiday season can be very stressful. So I highly suggest that you focus on sleep as much as you can.

        

00:01:05

            

And one way to do that is to get yourself a pair of nice, comfortable, cozy sheets. Especially for myself, I love the bamboo sheet set from Cozy Earth. They were named Oprah's Favorite Things in 2018. They have bedding, pillows, blankets, sleepwear. I love them also because they are temperature regulating, so they feel a little bit different for my husband than myself.

        

00:01:28

            

And they are just super soft and luxurious. But the best part is you get 40% off site wide if you use the code simple 40. Again, that's 40% off. So if you're needing a new pair of sheets this holiday season, if you're trying to feel a little silkier softer in bed, Cozy Earth is your friend 40% off. Simple 40.

        

00:01:53

            

My name is Andrea Allen  and I am a mother of four girls under seven, a wifey to a mountain man, a personal trainer and a nutrition coach. I love all things women's health and fitness, but let's face it, the fitness industry is complicated and it's not built for the everyday mom. There's so much conflicting information and you're busy and you don't have time to figure it out. I hate feeling confused and overwhelmed, so I have made it my mission to simplify health and fitness while creating a welcoming, realistic and empowering home for like minded women. I'm happy you're here and I hope you stay a while.

        

00:02:29

            

So we're going to get right down to business today. Three quick tips. They're effective, they're foolproof, they are my jam. I want us to all integrate them. I want us to think about them and I want us to live them, because I think it's going to make your holiday season less stressful about food and more exciting about the real reason of the holiday, which is family or friends and for many people, religion.

        

00:02:51

            

Whatever it is that you celebrate, my first number one tip is I want you to think about what you are doing when you are eating. So I know this might sound funny, but anytime you go to a party, a big dinner, whatever it is, I want you to pick what you honestly desire and stop going through the motions. What I mean by this is often we show up and we're like, oh, this is the traditional food. This is what we heat at this. This is just what they're serving.

        

00:03:22

            

Think about what you're putting on your plate. Do you even really love that item? Because if you don't, skip it. Are we eating things out of habit? Are we walking into a party and there's nuts on the table, so we're just grabbing a handful of nuts.

        

00:03:35

            

And maybe you don't even really love nuts. Or maybe they have a dessert there that is, I don't know, cupcakes. And you're like, I'm not really a cake person, but I'm at a party and it's the holiday, so I might as well have a cupcake. Stop doing that. Only eat the things you love, that you enjoy, that you look forward to.

        

00:03:53

            

That is what makes it fun. And then when you eat those things, I want you to enjoy them. I don't want you to feel guilt. I don't want you to feel any shame at all. My sister makes these buckeyes every single year at Christmas, and it basically is a ball of peanut butter and some other ingredients.

        

00:04:13

            

And then she dips them in chocolate. It's like a glorified holiday cup. Hello. Of course I love it when she delivers them to my house. I am in heaven and I love them.

        

00:04:24

            

I look forward to them every year. It's special. I hoard them. I don't share them with my children. I eat them in privacy.

        

00:04:30

            

Just kidding. I kind of share. I'll let them all share one while I have a full. But anyway, my point is I love that item and I don't want to feel shame over eating that buckeye. I want to enjoy that because that is something that screams the holidays to me.

        

00:04:45

            

Now, I'm not really into holiday breads or bakery items where they have different kinds of breads with frostings or whatever. It's not really my jam. And I could easily go to a party and be like, oh, well, that's what they have here and it's the holidays, so I'm just going to eat it. I don't I tell myself, do you really like that? Is that really something that you enjoyed, the taste buds and you look forward to having it every year?

        

00:05:08

            

Because if not, skip it. Save your space for the things you love and love the things you enjoy with no shame or guilt. So I want you to stop going through the motions and pick what you really desire, not out of habit. And the second piece is not out of hunger. Oftentimes during the holidays, we're busy.

        

00:05:29

            

We're running around, running a million errands, showing up at this concert, going to buy this gift, making this thing for some church activity, bringing the school, this, whatever it is. You're running around crazy. And then we show up somewhere and we're starving and before we know it, we're eating everything in the room and we're like, oh my gosh, I don't even know what I ate because I ate all the things. We have to stop doing that as well. So along with picking what you really desire, include that by not only just not doing it out of habit, but out of hunger.

        

00:06:00

            

Be prepared. Bring some snacks with you. Make sure you're eating your meals. When you are hungry, slow down and say to yourself, what do I really want? What is going to make me feel good?

        

00:06:10

            

What do I really enjoy? And eat that food slowly and enjoy it. Don't just go through the motions. Don't just do it out of habit and don't just do it out of hunger. Prepare yourself with snacks.

        

00:06:21

            

Keep things in your purse. People tease me because they'll go in my purse and they're like, oh, you think you're going to run out of food? I'm like, you better believe I've got like five or six snacks in there because I don't ever want to show up anywhere and be hungry because hangry Andrea nobody wants to see and Hangry Andrea doesn't get invited that many parties. So I always have snacks with me. But it also prevents me from making choices that I don't really want so that I can save and really have the items that I enjoy and that I love and that I desire.

        

00:06:49

            

And I'm not just doing it out of habit and I'm not just doing it out of hunger. So be aware, pick the things you want. Don't go through the motions of habit or doing it out of hunger. My next tip is going to be, and this is going to be very different, but I want you to stop allowing people to shame you for the foods you've chosen or stop shaming others for the foods they have chosen. We have to learn to recognize when someone has food triggers that are shaming us or be aware of when we are triggering someone else by comments and shaming them.

        

00:07:28

            

So I'm going to give you three quick tips within this tip. Because we're talking about food shame right now during the holidays to help you in this situation, help others. And not only that, but defend your own choices. So the first thing you need to do is stop and you need to recognize what is happening. I'm going to give you an example first of when someone is triggering you.

        

00:07:50

            

When someone is food shaming you. So you're at a dinner, you're at Thanksgiving, you're at a party, whatever it is, it can be with anything. It can be with your friends, with your spouse, whatever aunt bertha maybe says to you, oh, you're getting seconds. Oh, that's a lot of food on your plate. You're going to eat all of that?

        

00:08:09

            

Oh, how many calories do you think are in that? Oh, I can't believe you ate that whole piece of pie. Okay, these are passive aggressive, judgmental statements and nobody should be saying them. Nobody should be making comments on what someone else is eating. In my opinion, it's completely inappropriate.

        

00:08:31

            

I avoid these like the plague. I hate when they're made around me. I hate when they're made to me. And you better believe you will never catch those comments coming out of my mouth to other people. The problem is when we say that we're making that person feel insecure and we're making that person second guess their food choices, at the end of the day, their food choices are none of our business and we have no right to talk about their food choices.

        

00:08:57

            

To them, we are individuals and we are in charge of ourselves. And I think making comments like these in public, to friends, to family members in general are just inappropriate. And I think we need to avoid them because they really do trigger food shaming and they really do make people feel guilty and embarrassed of their choices. And we're in the holidays and the last thing we want to do is make people feel bad. I mean, in general, we should never want to do that.

        

00:09:24

            

But if we're surrounded by our loved ones, we want them to want to be around us. We don't need to be shaming them with these statements. And often people are saying them to us and it makes us feel uncomfortable. And then we don't want to go around family members. So what do you do when they're being said to you?

        

00:09:40

            

How do you handle when Aunt Bertha or your uncle or mom or whoever it is? A lot of people's parents even say these to them, how do we handle this? So what I'm going to suggest when someone makes a comment like this to you, and instantly you stop, you realize, oh my gosh, they're triggering food shame. And I want you to respond, it doesn't matter what is on your plate, what isn't on your plate. That's not the point.

        

00:10:03

            

I want you to respond to these comments and simply say, I'm having the amount that I wanted. End of story. It's none of their business what you're having. You have chosen. Remember, my first tip is pick what you want, enjoy your choice, love your choice, don't feel guilt and move on.

        

00:10:21

            

You don't need to justify to anybody, no matter what food shaming comment is made to you. You just need to say, I'm happy with the amount I'm having. I chose to have this amount to enjoy. I really enjoy this, and that is what I want on my plate. End of story.

        

00:10:37

            

All that needs to be said. Now, if you are someone. And this actually happens a lot with people who are into fitness, which is why I want to address this. Sometimes we are the ones triggering and causing the problems because we're trying to be healthy. And this is something I'm super aware of.

        

00:10:53

            

Like I said, you will never hear these comments come out of my mouth because I'm already very careful when I interact with people who aren't into fitness, because fitness and health is intimidating. And the last thing we want is for people to feel uncomfortable around us no matter what the circumstance is. So something to be careful about is when you are trying to eat healthy, when you're trying to control your portions, when you're on a diet or whatever you're doing, everyone's different. Maybe you just like to watch what you eat and you're just a little bit more picky. If someone asks you, hey, do you want this?

        

00:11:27

            

Do you want this piece of cake? Do you want this dessert? Do you want whatever? They ask you if you want something or why you're not eating something. You don't need to announce, I'm not eating that because I'm on a diet.

        

00:11:38

            

I'm not eating that because it's not good for you. I'm not eating that because I'm trying to be healthy. The reason why I say don't announce this is because what's happening is when you say that out loud, every single person who has that on their plate instantly, in some ways, you have made them feel embarrassed of their choice because that's insinuating. They're not trying to be healthy. Whether they are trying to be healthy or not trying to be healthy, that's not the point.

        

00:12:03

            

It's how we make people feel around us. And so pointing out some of these things isn't effective because we don't want people around us feeling guilty. Second thing is, you have no idea what people are going through behind closed doors. You could make a statement like, oh, I am not eating carbs. And maybe your little cousin Tina is sitting there and she has an eating disorder and she's like, you know what, I'm really working on it.

        

00:12:31

            

I'm going to have a little slice of pie. I'm really working on moderation. Maybe she is barely working on just building a lifestyle where she doesn't have to be all or nothing. And your statement could trigger her. It could make things so hard for her and we do not want that.

        

00:12:46

            

We don't know what people are going through behind closed doors. So we don't need to announce why we are not having something because we don't know who that would trigger. I remember one time I was at a birthday party and there was another trainer there and someone offered her I don't even remember they offered her something and she said, oh, I don't eat carbs after six. And that's fine, that is fine, I don't care. But what happens is every single person who has that item on their plate was instantly like, oh, okay, well, you're a trainer and you know better.

        

00:13:16

            

So obviously I feel bad. So that's why we want to try to avoid that. If you are trying to do something good for you, by all means, we're all individuals, but just say no thank you. You don't need to say why. You don't need to say you're on a diet.

        

00:13:31

            

You don't need to say you're watching your macros. You don't need to say you're avoiding fats or carbs or sugars or you don't eat this or you don't eat this. Just say no thank you and leave it at that. Or if someone's like, well, why? Just say, oh well, I'm just satisfied right now.

        

00:13:49

            

You don't need to explain because that is going to avoid any awkwardness over food shame for other people. I know in that moment, the person saying it doesn't feel ashamed and they're justifying why they're not doing something, but it does make other people around you uncomfortable. So just say thank you. So that's the first thing. Stop and recognize it.

        

00:14:06

            

Whether you are the one triggering the food shame or whether someone is triggering it to you, stop. Recognize it. Say no thank you. Or say I'm having the amount for my needs that I want right now, or to enjoy. Move on.

        

00:14:19

            

The second tip to this obviously issue with food shame is to shift. You need to shift the conversation so that it doesn't feel uncomfortable. So you stop, then you shift. When you shift, you simply ask the person a question about themselves, about a family member, about something you care about, and get them talking. The truth is, people love to talk about themselves.

        

00:14:39

            

They love to share. And that's a beautiful thing. And we build connections as we share. So if someone has said a very awkward comment to you about the food on your plate, say, I'm good with the amount I'm having. How is your daughter doing in soccer?

        

00:14:52

            

I heard that her team is doing really well. Or what sports do your kids play? Do your kids have any musical instruments? Whatever it is, it doesn't matter. Spit out a sentence to shift the conversation and instantly the conversation will move away from what is or isn't on your plate.

        

00:15:09

            

No matter what role you're in, if you're trying to enjoy something or maybe you're trying to be a little bit more careful, shift it. Shift it away from you and move on. The last little side piece of this stop shift is don't linger in the shame. Oftentimes when this happens, people will think about it. They'll think about it later and later and later and they'll say and then they will let it become an all or nothing where it becomes really negative.

        

00:15:33

            

Oh, she said I got seconds. I shouldn't have got seconds. I'm trying to be healthy and I got seconds. I really love that item that I had. Maybe I really love pumpkin pie and I just really wanted a second piece but I'm so bad for having seconds.

        

00:15:46

            

And then you just beat yourself up over and over and over again. That is not helping anything. You need to recognize the shame and say, you know what, I have this on the holiday. I really wanted that piece. I really enjoyed that piece.

        

00:16:01

            

I ate it slowly, I savored the bites and I moved on and I built connections with the people around me and I was friendly and I talked to people and I had a great time. And if anything, you know what, now that piece of pumpkin pie is going to be some great energy for your workout tomorrow. It is going to fuel your ability to have a fantastic workout. Look at it in a positive way like that. Not that it's ruining your life, but you know what, now you can actually probably lift a little heavier weights because maybe you had a few extra carbs.

        

00:16:32

            

Perfect. Try a couple of pounds up. Good for you. You have to shift the way you're looking at it. So when it comes to food shame this holiday, I want you to stop, recognize it, I want you to respond, then shift the conversation away from you and don't let that shame linger.

        

00:16:51

            

That's it. That's how we're going to handle with food conversations. And I know that is probably a little bit of a different my three best tips for handling food during the holidays. But it's important because it doesn't really matter if you're trying to build muscle, if you're trying to lose fat, if you're trying to maintain, if you're just trying to relax, it doesn't really matter where you sit. The food shaming comments are rapid coming from people, possibly coming from you, from all over the place.

        

00:17:17

            

And we can address it and it will make our holiday better if we're able to stop, shift, recognize the shame and move on and enjoy the people around us, which is why we are celebrating anyway and to build those connections. Okay, my last tip, and this is a little bit more of a traditional tip for handling food in the holidays is don't skip your protein. And not only skip but don't skimp, skimp. So skip or skimp on your protein during the holidays. Let me tell you what it is easy peasy to get your hands on carbs and fats, no big deal.

        

00:17:55

            

A lot of the things that we love are those great, that is normal, 100% normal. But we need to make sure that we are having plenty of protein during the holidays because if we can make sure that we're fueling ourselves with protein during the holidays, the chances of us maintaining are higher because a we're not showing up at the party, obviously starving and then eating things out of like I said, habit or hunger in my first tip. So that's one because protein has a higher thermogenic rate so it takes longer for your body to break down which means you stay fuller longer. Also protein helps you have a more stable insulin so you're not bumping highs and lows and highs and lows. It helps you kind of stay in the middle which helps us be able to logically make our food choices out of enjoyment and want and not out of feeling stressed or starvation and quick need because our blood sugar isn't balanced.

        

00:18:50

            

So protein does help with that. It makes a huge difference. Obviously I always want you to eat solid fruits and vegetables and fats and stuff. But protein I've noticed is the big one during the holidays. That just tanks for people.

        

00:19:03

            

They struggle with it because so many meals when we're out and about during the holidays and at parties and gatherings don't include protein. The protein items are often forgotten or they're not really huge staples during the holidays as delicates. So be smart throughout the day. Make sure that you are having protein in your breakfast, in your snacks, in your lunches and even like before you go to a party, it's not a bad thing to have something with protein. I often will go to a party where I know it's going to be kind of a mix and mingle where we're eating or d'oeuvres or something and I would have a protein shake before I go.

        

00:19:41

            

It's not my meal. I know I'm going to go and eat but I know that I'm going to have a solid amount of protein before I show up. So if I show up and I'm like, oh, these three items are my favorite holiday items and guess what? They're probably mainly fats and carbs, no big deal because I already got some protein in my belly so I don't feel bad about choosing those items that are mainly carbs and fat. Possibly that is okay.

        

00:20:07

            

So don't forget about your protein and not just all at once, try to have it throughout the day. Make sure your breakfast is packed with protein. I don't know that many people that are going to holiday parties or big events in the morning so make sure you are having protein in the morning. Don't skip food all day long simply because there's a party. I promise you you will actually choose better and more wisely and enjoy the things you're having because often if we show up starving we just like shovel everything down and we're like oh, did that even taste good?

        

00:20:36

            

I don't know why I ate so fast. I promise you will enjoy it better if you make sure you are having some solid protein in the morning and throughout the day. And then at the party you have obviously a few more options and that will give you a little bit more freedom to know that you are creating some balance there by making sure you're having a variety. So do not skip your protein. Make sure you're getting enough.

        

00:21:02

            

It's really going to help you during the holidays, maintain weight and truly enjoy the things you really want and not just eat out of habit. All right, so that is my three favorite tips for handling foods during the holiday. I'm sure some of those weren't what you expected, but, you know, I am a believer in moderation, I am a believer in lifestyle. You're not going to come to my podcast and find me telling you to go 40 days without sugar during the holidays, because you better believe I won't be doing that. But I do believe if we make wise choices and we're aware of our choices, that we can still always have success.

        

00:21:37

            

I work with clients all through the month of December and I don't tell any of them to eat 100% clean and they still see changes. They still will easily get stronger, lose weight, whatever their goal is. It kind of varies by person, but you're not trapped just because you think you have to be perfect. I promise you can see changes and still have moderation and these tips will actually help you. So let's review them real fast.

        

00:22:01

            

I want you to actually pick what you want, love what you want, enjoy what you want, and don't go through the motions out of habit or hunger. Enjoy it and move on. I want you to manage the food shaming comments or prevent yourself from saying them by stopping, recognizing it, shifting the conversation, and not letting the shame linger. And lastly, I want you to not skip your protein. It's huge.

        

00:22:26

            

Protein is a deal breaker when it comes to muscle. You need it. Muscle helps your metabolism. They're all friends, so we need to make sure that we're using that protein and we're really not forgetting about it during the holidays because we're just enjoying some of the other delicates of the season. You can mix those in just fine, but get that protein in.

        

00:22:45

            

I hope those tips are helpful today. I honestly hope this November and December you have a fantastic holiday season. And I hope these help you see that you can have moderation and you can enjoy the holidays and you can still be strong and healthy and fit. I love you. I mean it.

        

00:23:05

            

And as always, you are always doing better than you think you are. All right, we'll chat next week.