The Burn Podcast by Ben Newman
Join Ben Newman, highly regarded Performance Coach, International Keynote Speaker and 2x WSJ Best-Seller, as he takes you into the minds of some of the highest performers in sports and business to tell their full story. The "Burn" is something we all have, but rarely do people uncover and connect to it. Ben helps people from all walks of life reach their true maximum potential.
Ben has worked with coaches and players from the last 6 Super Bowl Champion teams and currently serves as the Performance Coach for the Big 12 Champion Kansas State football team in his 9th season (3 National Championships at North Dakota State) with Head Coach Chris Klieman. Ben served 5 years as the Mental Conditioning Coach for the 18x National Champion Alabama Crimson Tide football team. Lastly, Ben also has served at his alma mater as a Performance Coach for Michigan State University’s football and basketball programs.
For the last two decades, Ben has been serving as the Peak Performance Coach for the top 1% of financial advisors globally and for Fortune 500 business executives.
Ben’s clients have included: Microsoft, United States Army, Anheuser-Busch InBev, Quicken Loans, MARS Snackfoods, AstraZeneca, Northwestern Mutual, AFA Singapore, Mass Financial Group, Frontier Companies, Wells Fargo Advisors, Great West Life Canada, Boston Medical Center, Boys & Girls Club of America, New York Life as well as thousands of executives, entrepreneurs, athletes and sales teams from around the globe.
Millions of people and some of the top performers in the world have been empowered by Ben through his books, educational content, coaching programs, podcast, and live events.
The Burn Podcast by Ben Newman
Stop Wasting Days: How to Build Your Daily Life around Intention and Purpose
In this episode, we're talking about living your life with more intention and ensuring you don't waste a single day. It's about attacking every day with discipline so that the byproduct is winning at very high levels. I'll share a gripping story about Ray Lewis and how a small shift in perspective can lead to game-changing results in YOUR life.
If you're ready to stop gambling your days away and start owning them, this episode is for you. By the end, you'll have actionable takeaways to help you live a more intentional life.
Timestamp Chapters: 00:00 - Introduction 01:00 - The Power of Discipline and Daily Standards 04:45 - The Ray Lewis Story 10:46 - The Burn Inside You 13:36 - Case Study: Will Compton 18:19 - My Mother's Legacy 20:53 - Standard Over Feelings 24:38 - The Four P's of The Standard- Daily Excellence
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It's about choosing to live to a standard, that when you attack that standard every single day and the disciplines that will cause you to win, the byproduct is winning at very high levels.
Speaker 2:Welcome back to another episode of the Burn. I'm your occasional co-host, tyler, and this week we are taking you to Las Vegas for Ryan Pineda's event WealthCon. Earlier this year, ben kicked off Ryan's event WealthCon in Las Vegas with a powerful training that we wanted to share with you today on this episode. Us with a powerful training that we wanted to share with you today on this episode. This training will help you understand a framework that will help you live your life with more intention and not waste a single day. Thanks for listening. We hope you enjoy this special training and episode of the show. Good morning, good morning.
Speaker 1:Good morning. I got 25 minutes, so we can't be standing like that. You feel me, to each and every single one of you. I want to get right down to it, because Ryan and I'm so grateful for this opportunity mentioned something about going deeper, about establishing clarity, about having a belief of where you can go in your life, about having a belief of where you can go in your life. So I wanted to start by getting real with all of you and having a conversation with you.
Speaker 1:How many of you have been waking up every day, gambling away your life one day at a time, saying to other people how bad you want it one day at a time, recognizing there's days where you give it everything that you've got, but then there's days where you miss, one day at a time. How many of you have just gambled day after day after day after day after day? I want to share a story with you about a deck of cards. I had the opportunity back in 2016 to share the stage with an individual who shared a story about a deck of cards, a story about a deck of cards that I had never heard before. The story went like this this young man lived in a home where his mother was being physically abused by his stepfather. He, as a young boy, would watch as his stepfather would put his hands on his mother, day after day after day. This young boy was actually removed from the house. They turned the garage into his bedroom. One day he says to his mom he says, mama, will you go to the grocery store and buy me a deck of cards? His mom doesn't even ask why and brings the deck of cards back home to her son. Her son opened up the deck of cards with the box, just like I did right in front of you, and he took out that first card and he looked at it and he said a four and he would prop his feet underneath the bottom of the bed so that he could. So it would be nice and tight and he would do four sit-ups and then, after he would do those four sit-ups, he'd flip over and he'd hit four push-ups. He'd flip the next card. Another four, get his feet locked, nice and tight underneath that bed. Four sit-ups, flip over, four push-ups, then he'd have a three. Then he'd have a two. Then he'd have a two. Then he'd have an ace. Ace is 10. Then he'd hit that joker. Joker was 25.
Speaker 1:What this young man was doing was building up the strength to make sure that that stepfather would never lay a hand on his mother ever again. That young boy built up that strength until one day he felt like he had it in him. Just like each and every single one of you, everything you need is already in you and at some point in time, you're going to make the choice to go get it, and maybe you have to defend yourself, maybe you have to defend little eyes that are watching you in your house, but you're going to make a choice to say never again and you're going to choose to change how you show up in this life with no regret, because we never get a second chance. Change how you show up in this life with no regret, because we never get a second chance. And he watched his stepfather try to put a hand on his mom again and he ended it, and never again did it happen. That young boy's name was Ray Lewis.
Speaker 1:Ray Lewis has been a friend of mine since 2016, when we shared the stage that first time in St Louis. I'm going to share something with you about Ray. Ray is a misunderstood human being. Ray Lewis is a man that has a fire and passion for life to attack. Ray Lewis is a man. He's got these big, powerful eyes. If you've ever watched a video. He's one of the most inspirational athletes ever, one of the most decorated NFL players of all. Time His fire comes out of his eyes Mine comes out of this vein on my neck. I want to tell you guys something. When you see this vein pop I'm not yelling at anybody today. It's called passion, and if Panetta gives me 25 minutes, you're going to have 25 minutes of everything that I've got, just like Ray Lewis. Every time you ever saw him, you got everything that he had, and before we went on stage that day in 2016 in St Louis Missouri, I'll never forget it.
Speaker 1:I actually made a phone call about that day to the first player that I ever mentored in the NFL. Now I work with over 30 players in the NFL. I've worked with players or coaches on the last six Super Bowl champion teams, but the first player I ever worked with was in 2013, a young man by the name of Will Compton. At the time, he was an undrafted free agent out of the University of Nebraska. Now you guys know him for an amazing show called Bussing with the Boys and Will became like a little brother to me through our work together and I'm going to share two things with you today that will change how you think and change how you take action, if you choose to think and take action differently. Same things I shared with Will in 2013.
Speaker 1:I called Will when I received the phone call about the opportunity to share the stage with Ray Lewis that day. And I called Will and I said now, will being a linebacker in the NFL, that's a dream. Ray Lewis was his idol and I said Will, we're about to make your dreams come true. You get to meet Ray Lewis. You need to be here on this day in St Louis. He's like, brother, stop, like, stop messing with me. I said no, I'm serious, you're going to meet Ray Lewis, he said. I said stop messing with me today. I said, brother, you better be here, otherwise you're going to miss the opportunity to meet Ray Lewis.
Speaker 1:He shows up to St Louis. We're at the cigar club at the Ritz-Carlton. You can picture it's this big oversized room. On one wall there are all these couches that line the wall. On the other side, there's this big oversized mahogany table. Other side, there's this big oversized mahogany table. Ray Lewis is sitting smoking a cigar at that mahogany table just to relax before we go take the stage that night together. And Will Compton walks into the room. When they see each other, they lock eyes. And these two men, these two NFL players, this respect for each other. They see each other and they come and they meet other and they come and they meet and they shake hands. Will then goes and he sits on the couch. Ray goes back to the table. A couple of minutes goes by and all of a sudden I see Ray Lewis stand up from this table. His eyes get big with that fire you know I'm talking about and I'm sitting there going to myself what in the world is about to happen in this room. And Ray Lewis stands up, wills over on the couch and he walks over to him and Ray gets down just like this and will sitting on the couch and he says hey, will, are you ready for me to take you to school? He says I want to help you understand, will.
Speaker 1:When I found the difference in my life, he said, I took it upon myself, I accepted responsibility for myself to break down the game film in my life and on the field and I decided to make changes. He said on the football field, by watching film I recognized when I was five yards off the line of scrimmage I was nasty. But he said, when I moved one yard up to four yards off the line of scrimmage, they didn't know what to do with me. Comp, and we know the rest of the story, don't we cop?
Speaker 1:For those of you that may not know, two-time Super Bowl champion, Super Bowl MVP, one of the greatest defensive players to ever walk the face of the earth, earth First ballot unanimous Hall of Famer and, most importantly, a little boy who found a burn and a fire inside of his heart that when he realized how strong it was to give his mom her hope and her passion for life back, he realized that was a burn inside of him like you all have a burn inside of you that when he stayed connected to it he could accomplish whatever he wanted to in his life. He found that fire. He found that burn watching his mom through her pain. Just like many of you, your challenge and adversity oftentimes build your greatest strength. And then what did he say? He took personal responsibility to look at the game film to identify this. One yard, one yard was the difference. One yard was the difference to become the player that he could be that we all know him to be now could be that we all know him to be now. So the challenge that I have for all of you and I say this with love and passion, knowing that everything you need is already in you, knowing that so many of you have already done extraordinary things in your life the goal and the challenge that I have for you is that here at WealthCon, you attack that one yard. You attack that one yard of your life with the relationships that are in this room, with the speakers that will stand on this stage. I want you to take this opportunity in this moment, at this conference, right now, to never look at your life the same way, to say if Ray Lewis could attack that one yard, if he could get right in front of Will Compton's face and essentially he said Will, attack that one yard. And I can tell you I was so proud to watch Will that next year, attack that yard and never look back. You see, when I met Will in 2013, he was seven out of seven on a depth chart. He was an undrafted free agent. Told that you will never make it in the NFL, just like. Maybe people are telling you right now and you better be careful who you bring into your life that maybe you shouldn't be doing what you're doing. Maybe you shouldn't go to WealthCon. Why are you doing what you're doing? Small circles create big damage. You better be careful who you bring into your life. Circles create big damage. You better be careful who you bring into your life. Will Compton took that advice from Ray Lewis. I held him accountable to that advice and he started breaking down game film. He went from an undrafted free agent At the time of that conversation. He was a starter. By the end of that season he was the captain of the Washington Redskins and led him to the playoffs for the first time in 10 years.
Speaker 1:So now that I have your attention, can we talk about your one yard? Now that we have your attention, can we agree that you're feeling passion? I haven't yelled at anybody yet. Now that I have your attention, I want to share two things with you that I have found to be the difference and I say this as humbly as I possibly can. It's been an amazing blessing. I've been doing this for over 19 years. First time I ever got paid to speak was 2006. 19 years with some of the highest performers to ever walk the face of the earth in business and in sports, and so an opportunity for me to be with all of you, individuals that have already written amazing stories, my belief that your best chapters are in front of you after you attack this yard, and I share a couple of things that might make the difference in how you think and how you take action. How could I not be excited about this opportunity to be with all of you to kick off WealthCon?
Speaker 1:The secret of the highest performers to ever walk the face of the earth is what I call the burn. You see, there's a lot of coaches and speakers that do the work that I do, and let me just share one thing with you. I am not a motivational speaker, I am a coach, and so if I can't share something with you today that changes how you think and changes the action that you take to drive long-term growth and sustainability, to take that canvas of your imagination, to pull it right down and put it right in front of your face and never think or take action the same way, then that's not enough for me. That's where we have to go together. So I'm not a motivational speaker, I'm a coach, and so in coaching, I've learned to know that why and purpose is not enough. It's unbelievably important, but it's not enough. There's a burn that lies inside of each and every single one of you and it's that burn that ignites your why and purpose on a daily basis, that causes you to show up on the days that you don't feel like it, and especially after you win. You see, just like Ray Lewis, there was pain in his childhood where he established his strength.
Speaker 1:I grew up in a house where my parents were divorced. When I was six months old, I never knew them together. My dad was a drug addict, an alcoholic, manic, depressive, bipolar everything under the sun and my mother said enough is enough. A handful of years after my mom, as a single mom fighting to make ends meet, she's diagnosed with a rare muscle disease called amyloidosis. Each and every single one of you, in your muscles, you have amyloids. If you have an excess of amyloidosis, you have a disease called amyloids. You have amyloidosis.
Speaker 1:At the time of her diagnosis, two hospitals in the United States treating the disease the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota and the Boston Medical Center my mother chose Boston, where she went for the first time and she was told you're only the second woman under 40 years old I've ever seen or heard of having the disease. You have two to four years to live. How would you respond? My mother decided to take out an old blue mead notebook, maybe like you used to have in school maybe yours was another color and she would write beat the statistics, beat the odds, live with the disease. That is chronic and fatal. Believe in yourself. Combat anything. Purpose in life. My mother would battle this disease. To this day. There's still no cure for amyloidosis.
Speaker 1:We had 24-hour nursing care in the home. I remember when nursing care came into the house, took the belongings out of my mother's TV room, turned it in the makings of a hospital and my mom, every night, without fail, would put one foot in front of the other, one foot in front of the other, one foot in front of the other, until she'd get to the head of that dining room table and she'd look over to my brother, drew, and say, drew, how was your day at school? And then she'd pan over to the left and she'd look me dead square in the eyes and say honey, how was your day at school? You notice. I got the honey because I was the younger son. I got to try to get you to laugh a little bit because this is probably not what you expected.
Speaker 1:My mother passed away 11 days before my eighth birthday. My mother is the greatest champion of life that I've ever known. My mother taught me what it means to fight. My mother taught me what it means to have passion. My mother taught me what it means to fight. My mother taught me what it means to have passion. My mother taught me what it means to have conviction. My mother taught me what it means to never waste a day. On November 2nd 1986, she passed the pen of that journal on to me to have the opportunity to continue to write her story, and all I want today, with the fire that was lit, the burn that was lit inside of me when I took that pen, is for you to identify your burn and start connecting to it every day, because that burn has now been lit inside of me and you can't get it to go out. My mother passed away at 38 years old. I'm a 45-year-old man. That means I've been given seven extra years that my mother never got, one day at a time, and I don't gamble my days away. I own them. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. I stack them over and over, and over, and over and over again.
Speaker 1:I don't want any of you wasting your days. All you have to do is to connect to that burn that lies inside of you. Maybe there's pain or challenge that you've had in your life. Connect to it every day. I promise you won't waste your days. Maybe there's somebody who's made sacrifice for you. Don't waste their sacrifice. Maybe you're sacrificing for somebody right now. They're watching you. You can't waste a day. Or maybe there's somebody who told you that you weren't good enough. You're too small, you can't do this, you can't do that. And you go. Show them exactly who you are, one day at a time.
Speaker 1:Connect to that burn inside of you. Allow it to light that why and purpose on fire and watch how you win more in your life. That, my friends, is the secret of the highest performers in the world. They all have it. You probably have it. You maybe haven't heard it referenced that way. Maybe you connect to yours sometimes, but not all the time.
Speaker 1:First thing I want you to do is, for the next 30 days, connect to it every single day when you wake up, I don't care where you put it in your phone. If you keep a journal, I call it a burn journal. You connect to that every single day and watch how your life will never be the same. You take everything that you learn from your one yard here at WealthCon. You light your world on fire by connecting to your burn every single day and you watch what happens. Second thing I want to share with you today having done this for 19 years, I've learned. There's a couple things about human performance that we need to cover today. I wish I had more than six minutes to go over this. I wish we had more time together, but I'm going to give you an understanding of your ability to connect to this for two minutes every single day. So, if you connect to your burn and you connect to these four P's of the standard, this is going to take you two minutes a day and you adapt this philosophy right here standard over feelings.
Speaker 1:I sat in Coach Saban's office in 2017. I'm sitting right in the GOATS office and he's interviewing me and he says, ben, what are we going to talk about today? I said, coach, we're going to talk about standard over feelings. Don't allow your feelings to dictate how you show up. It's about choosing to live to a standard that, when you attack that standard every single day and the disciplines that will cause you to win, the byproduct is winning at very high levels. You see, coach Saban already knew that that's how winning was done, but it was what I had believed to be the truth, because of the winning that I was already doing in college football, the winning I was already doing in the NFL and the winning that I had done since 2006 with people just like you.
Speaker 1:And this is the only way that winning is done. It's not about a living to your feelings. There's four Ps that I want you to connect to every single day. This will take you two minutes every morning. So imagine I'm not asking you to ask god for a 36 hour day. I'm just asking you to use the 24 that you got, maybe with more intentional focus. Not focus, because focus is not enough. The intentional focus that will cause you to show up differently in your life, and I'm one of those individuals who I'm going to give it to you. Real. I'm not one of those coaches who talks about riding around on unicorns, planting your feet into the ground and looking up at the sky and saying, dear God, I hope it happens. You've got to pray like it all depends on God and work like it all depends on you. So you have to be honest with yourself that right now, every single one of you, you're probably in the middle of a problem. You just worked your way out of a problem. You might be walking into a problem or your problem is that you're winning. You see, one of the biggest problems is that when we're winning, we become seduced by success rather than continuing to do the things that cause us to win. So this is simple Every day, I want you to just identify what the problem is.
Speaker 1:After you identify the problem, very simply, I want you to do some planning, simple planning. I want you to reverse engineer. What does it look like in your life? What do your best days look like, personally, professionally and in your service to others? What do your best days look like? Reverse engineer them and say here's what I need to do to win, one day at a time. That's the planning. You guys realize how easy this is. I got a 19 on my ACT, so I got to keep it simple. Okay, the performance. This is easy, coach Saban, if you ever want to come to a practice with me at Alabama. He used to say two things all the time the way you do one thing is the way you do everything, and we don't do things until we get them right. We do things until we can't get them wrong. So this is simple, right? I identify the problem. I've been winning so much. Last quarter was the best quarter that I ever had.
Speaker 1:You know a guy like Ryan Pinedo. What makes him special? Right, over a hundred million dollars in real estate transactions, and they're just getting started. He's hungry for more. He's giving you that hunger to say don't be seduced by success, don't be satisfied, you can give more. Maybe when you connect to that burn and maybe when you connect to this, you'll show up like Ryan and just keep stacking those days, regardless of the results. But Ryan shows up and he does the performance piece, he does the work. So all I'm asking you, it's simple If you know what the problem is, I'm winning so much, much. Then identify what's causing me to win and then just do it. Keep doing it every day, because the payoff is confirmation that the process is working.
Speaker 1:We live in a world where everybody tells you how great they want to be, a very small group of individuals actually does the work every single day to prove that their words actually mean something to them. I want this to be a room where you choose to attack that yard. You choose to never think the same. You choose to never live the same. You choose to take advantage of the gift that God has given you and don't you ever waste it. Long obedience in the same direction with aggressive patience.
Speaker 1:Nobody ever said this would be easy, but you're built for it and everything you need is already in you. So you might as well take it every single day so that when you get these payoffs, you will not be seduced by success. This is the ultimate. You see, when I do this before I've got this beautiful handwriting, it gets really bad when I'm live and I get my heart rate going like this. So no seduction of success when you get the payoff.
Speaker 1:This is the ultimate in allowing your feelings to dictate how you show up Silence. It Don't allow your feelings to dictate how you show up Live to the standard every single day. Take two minutes to connect to these four Ps of the standard and watch how it changes your life. Be intentional about your ability to connect to your burn every single day. Don't gamble away your days. Have a willingness to look yourself right in the eyes every single day and to look at that yard and to break down your game. Fill in that accountability mirror and take control of your life so that winning can be what I believe winning to be for you, which is your ability to look yourself in the mirror one day at a time and say today, I gave it my very best.
Speaker 1:If you do that after connecting to your burn, after by attacking these four Ps, nobody can ever ask any more of you than your very best, and you can never ask any more of yourself than your very best best, and you can never ask any more of yourself than your very best. If there's anything that's holding you back, let it go. Everything you need is already in you go. Take it all now we go. Thank you so much for having me.
