The month of May is always a period of transition for students as they get ready to embark on their next journey. In our latest episode, we share our stories about transitioning from student to full-time professionals. We recount our own post-graduation journeys and the decisions we made during a time of uncertainty and transition.
Our conversation then turns to a cornerstone of career development: authenticity. We delve into the intricate dance of blending self-expression with professional conduct. We look at the internal battles within professional spaces, the embracing of diverse backgrounds, and how letting your full self shine at work isn't just refreshing—it's essential.
In this episode, we invite you on a journey of personal growth and trust in the unknown. As we share stories of leaps taken and the growth that ensues, we aim to empower you to face life's transitions with courage, knowing that the nerves that come with new beginnings are universal. Join us for an episode that champions personal evolution and the beauty of embracing change head-on.
The month of May is always a period of transition for students as they get ready to embark on their next journey. In our latest episode, we share our stories about transitioning from student to full-time professionals. We recount our own post-graduation journeys and the decisions we made during a time of uncertainty and transition.
Our conversation then turns to a cornerstone of career development: authenticity. We delve into the intricate dance of blending self-expression with professional conduct. We look at the internal battles within professional spaces, the embracing of diverse backgrounds, and how letting your full self shine at work isn't just refreshing—it's essential.
In this episode, we invite you on a journey of personal growth and trust in the unknown. As we share stories of leaps taken and the growth that ensues, we aim to empower you to face life's transitions with courage, knowing that the nerves that come with new beginnings are universal. Join us for an episode that champions personal evolution and the beauty of embracing change head-on.
Hello, hello, welcome back everybody. Welcome back to Coffee and Career Hour. Arminé, yes, I'm excited. It's actually been a couple of weeks. It's been a month, yeah, since we recorded, so bear with us everybody.
Speaker 2:
Everybody's going through some transitioning periods right now.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, it's definitely a busy time, I think, for everybody, and it's the month of May, yay, yay. This month is actually kind of like an important month, I would say, in the line of work that we do, because we see a big shift in energy when it comes to people transitioning.
Speaker 2:
Yes, it's senior season for us. Yeah, it's so funny. I thought you were going to say it's like Mother's senior season for us. Yeah, I thought it's so funny. I thought you were gonna say it's like mother's day. Oh yeah, it's the route you were. I mean, yes, of course it's mother's day, but yes, yes, well, yes, that is also very important.
Speaker 1:
Um, holiday, it's gonna be my first mother's day, but um, on that note, it is an important month in that sense. We actually see a lot of stress and anxiety this month.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, there's honestly a peak, I think, in the amount of students we see. So seniors are always one of the top grade levels or college level students that we see, and then the amount of emotion that they bring in with them is very heavy and dense too in our sessions, because it's either like I'm in a full-blown panic because I don't know what to do I don't know why I picked this major and all those other conversations or students are trying to navigate what to do in the next couple steps, whether that's finding a job, going to grad school, taking a break. I mean, the options are kind of endless here, yeah yeah, and you know, it's not even just seniors.
Speaker 1:
The seniors, I would say, are the most who come during this time, yeah, with a lot of anxiety.
Speaker 1:
But it's also other students who are like transitioning from, let's say, sophomore year to junior year and they're like, oh my gosh, I didn't get an internship. What am I going to do? I have to have an internship at this time. Or freshmen going to sophomore year and they're like, oh my gosh, I didn't get an internship, what am I gonna do? I have to have an internship at this time. Or freshmen going to sophomore year and they're like I wasn't involved in any student orgs this year. What am I gonna do? I'm behind like everybody's. All of a sudden it's like a awakening moment behind?
Speaker 1:
yeah, because they're getting ready for the next academic year. So it's like in their minds, like what does this mean? Am I, am I forward, am I behind, am I on track? Um, so there's just a lot of anxious energy in the world right now. Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2:
I think any transitional period though in someone's life is going to bring that emotion of uncertainty and what's next for me and is everything going to work out and am I going to be okay? Am I going to live from this? So it's an interesting time.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, yeah, I would say we as counselors can definitely resonate with that feeling of anxiety of is this all gonna work out? Where am I headed next? I mean, mj, tell us about a time when you felt that way every day in my life.
Speaker 2:
Um, yeah, same. It's so funny. For this specifically, I, I, I, I always reflect on if I did, if I didn't know I was going to graduate school after undergrad, what would I have done? You know how long would I have waited. What would have been that Like? Uh, what would that have been like? And for me, I would have just stayed working and then, I think, figured it out since then. But it would have been a lot more tough because I didn't know all of the things I know now and I didn't know how much resources and support there was out there. So I can't even imagine who I would be if, if I didn't have at least that small transitional point planned out.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, well, same here. I mean, I went to grad school because of the anxiety of not knowing what to do Remember I've shared on this podcast but like because school was something that I that was comfortable for me. I had always been in school my whole life. I was, like, who's going to hire me? What am I going to do out in the real world? Like I yeah, I had no idea what I could offer, what skills they had, so it was more of my comfort zone of just like I should stay in school, you know know what's crazy too.
Speaker 2:
I'm thinking about students transition from student, the student identity, to a professional right like this, working, functioning, adult. Yeah I didn't feel like a professional for like a long time, a long oh, it took a minute to sink in.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, for sure, like when I was no longer a student and getting used to just like the day-to-day, the full-time job schedule. It was so draining.
Speaker 2:
I was like I remember feeling like responsible, but I don't think I was. I could tell you that I felt like a professional. Yeah, very different than the way I feel now yeah, no, I, I definitely agree.
Speaker 1:
I'm trying to remember like that first because working part-time like when I first finished school, I had a part-time job for a few months and that still was like you know, it was fun, like I didn't feel you were in a transitioning time yeah.
Speaker 1:
I didn't feel the pressure of it. But when I got the full-time job, that was like the big girl job. That was the job where I had to be a professional. I had to. Apparently. I thought I had to have it all figured out, but of course we all know that wasn't the case. I didn't feel like a professional either until a little bit, a little bit past, and like I started, you know, really sinking into my role and realizing that there are, you know, I could try different things and I had a great supervisor, so that helped, but it took a minute to feel like a professional.
Speaker 2:
I think I mean, man, I just gave a keynote on on authentic professionalism. So it's so funny that all of these topics is like the third time I talk about it this week. All these different things are coming back to me. But for professionalism, the beginning was a lot of me mimicking what I saw as a kid.
Speaker 2:
Long story short I mimicked a lot of what I saw my family's bosses do because they were lawyers, doctors, scientists all these amazing titles all my family's bosses do because they were lawyers, doctors, science all these amazing titles. And they still are just amazing human beings and professionals that I look up to and admire now. But I would mimic their behavior a lot as a professional. So I think it took me a while to figure out what I, what, who, how did professionalism fit inside of MJ? That's what it took me a while to figure out and I think finally I'm there and I'm comfortable with it and that's why I can come across and I've been told like you come across so like natural and authentic and all these different things, and I'm like it's because I've accepted who I am and found how professionalism fits inside of me, not me fit inside of professionalism.
Speaker 1:
I love that. Yeah, I love that. So how did you find that? How did you even like come to the point where you realize that and become comfortable?
Speaker 2:
Honestly, I noticed it when. So there was a lot of points in my life, well when I was, when I was a graduate intern that I noticed that I was doing my job but I was feeling separated from the identity of it. So I was very much so like the graduate career intern, but I wasn't myself. I was not bringing my full self to work because I was extremely intimidated by people around me who had doctorate degrees, who had director titles, all these different things where I didn't feel comfortable. And it wasn't until I brought my whole self and I brought my identities.
Speaker 2:
What does that mean? Being low income, coming from that type of background, single parent background, being okay and not embarrassed of not knowing what resources were available and not knowing how to do stuff and how my internship was, happenstance and how you should have had an internship right like this is all of a plan. And it wasn't until I brought those pieces where my job felt easier and I got quote-unquote like better at it. But it was just because I was putting all of these pieces into my work and that is what made it feel more natural and I started to become like I just not started to become, but I just started being just me, just me like, not even like the true version, just me, yeah. So that's kind of like short story how it happened.
Speaker 2:
I love that.
Speaker 1:
And now.
Speaker 2:
I think like I'm completely unashamed of who I am.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, oh, that's amazing. I wish that for everybody.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, it's, it's really like liberating because, I don't have to like I can tell you all my silly jokes and I don't feel like embarrassed or like that. One of my favorite cartoons is SpongeBob, like silly things like that. You know that I bring to my practice, that it really just allows me to be my full self with students and with other individuals and that specifically, that aspect allows me to make the impact that I do.
Speaker 1:
Oh, of course, because that's what people connect with. Yeah, I know that a lot of times when we talk about authentic professionalism or when I talk about what my clients like be authentic in your interviews, people always kind of have a reaction to that Like no, you can't really be yourself in your interview, right Like you have to have the professional version of yourself. So what do you tell people when, when they say that, yeah, it's a persona.
Speaker 2:
You. You establish this persona as you're growing into your career, because you're you're looking and you're you're impacted by certain people who you consider professional, right, so you're picking and choosing what aspects and characteristics you like of them and applying that to your own life. So you're developing this persona, this professional persona, and in an interview, that's what you are, right, you are just this persona of who you're trying to be. But when I have people who are like, what do you mean? I'm supposed to, like, share all my life stories and then tell me about yourself no, that's not what I'm saying, right, but it's more so like, how would you introduce yourself to someone you just met, right? What are those versions of yourself that you are unapologetic about or that are very true to your character? So maybe for you, arminie, that's now like you're a mom. That's one of the newest identities and that's who you are and that's who you're going to be in an interview.
Speaker 2:
I mean, there could be a different conversation, depending on how strategic that might look for certain employers, right, if we're being honest. Conversation, depending on how strategic that might look for certain employers right, if we're being honest. But in education, everybody loves parents, right, so you are going to not be shameful of what that looks like, so we're not going to not say you're not a parent and have them find out later. And if you are first gen right, first generation college student, who what we consider and think about is someone who had challenges navigating the US higher education system to be where they are, that's something you're going to mention too right.
Speaker 2:
When we see that version of Armin A versus the Armin A who's like hi, I'm an assistant director for UCLA. It's a more rigid persona, Rather, the other person. The other persona that you show us who you are is you, the other person. The other persona that you show us who you are is you, and that's the person you want to show in an interview. Because if you're just demonstrating this personal persona, that's who you're on paper, right Black and white on a resume, Whereas I want to know the human being 100%.
Speaker 1:
I don't know if that made sense. Oh, totally, yeah, no, it makes so much sense Because I mean, when you think about, think about like having a conversation with someone, let's say for our audience, like you're at a bar or something and you like meet someone and you're having a conversation and they don't share with you anything where you like understand them as a person, they just share with you like okay, this is what I do for work and like you, know it's so um boring.
Speaker 1:
It really is very bad person. You're not going to remember that person I could have just like read that on linkedin or something yeah, it's, it's the energy, it's the like, little even like.
Speaker 1:
I even say, like in interviews, do a joke where appropriate. It's okay to even like crack a little bit of a joke. Um, if, if the opportunity presents itself like that's where they get to connect with you as a human being. It's so hard to say in words because I feel like this is a skill, but it it's definitely a skill. It's a skill and it's also something that comes with confidence. Yeah, and, like you said, accepting yourself.
Speaker 2:
Yeah.
Speaker 1:
Because you can't like fake this skill.
Speaker 2:
You know what I mean, absolutely. I mean, yeah, I would never mention like Spongebob in an interview, unless they ask like you know, like something silly.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, tell them something silly about yourself.
Speaker 2:
But in an interview I'm going to be on unapologetically, me right. I'm going to talk about the truths of my life and how certain aspects shaped and molded me to be who I am, because that's who I'm going to bring to this new opportunity.
Speaker 1:
I'm not going to leave those opportunities.
Speaker 2:
I'm not going to leave those parts of who I am behind. So it's better to show that. And then if, if that employer, that person does not want you, then maybe is that an opportunity you want to even consider right.
Speaker 1:
So that also gives you insight and that's what we mean as career practitioners when we say you're also interviewing the company, yeah, to see, okay, if they're not, if they're rigid, yeah Right, like, and you're trying to go and be a human being over there and have, you know, connect with people, but then they're like super rigid, then you might not even enjoy working at that company. Very true.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, and that's why it's important to know who you are right as you're walking into these interviews.
Speaker 1:
Yes, 100%, but I think that's the hardest thing for anybody who's going through a transition getting ready for a job interview, or transitioning from student to professional, or transitioning from job to job or career changers, right, um, I think that, like we always talk about the career development process and the first step is knowing yourself, I mean that it's, it's true, like you gotta know yourself even before going into that interview or changing your job or whatever transition you're going to absolutely I love.
Speaker 2:
honestly, that's my favorite phase and I think I always say this too. That's the one that bleeds into everything else and is happening in the background while you're going through the other phases, because you're constantly going back and being like, okay, now that I've done the career exploration, like do I want to do this, how am I feeling about this? And you're always reflecting on the self and building on the self. I don't know. I love that. I love that phase a lot.
Speaker 1:
I agree it's my favorite too. I feel like when we talk about knowing yourself in the context of career, I think people always think like, what am I interested in?
Speaker 2:
No, that's not all it.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, that's like the surface level stuff. You know we talk about interest at the very beginning, but there's like so much more where you get deeper into, like you're saying, the different layers of your identity that you can bring into your work, um, I would say like your limiting beliefs or your insecurities, because that stuff really comes out in in your work. It does.
Speaker 2:
It does and it really does shape how you navigate the next kind of steps of whatever transition that looks like for you too, or whatever wherever you are in your career as well 100 of your transitioning and you're insecure about something that's going to impact the decision that you make about your next move yeah, right, that's how it was for me.
Speaker 1:
I was insecure about, like, going into the real world and getting a big girl job after college. So, yeah it. It ultimately ended up being a great decision going to grad school, because I ended up loving the field that I'm in. But my, like, first motivation, initial motivation to go to grad school, was because of a place of insecurity. I didn't. I was too scared to go into the real world.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, it felt safe. It was a safe move to make at the time.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, and we see that with a lot of our students now who are transitioning from student to professional Crazy.
Speaker 2:
Oh, I know, oh, I remember that time. I mean, I remember both times as an undergrad and grad, but that's a whole other story for another day.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, so what else would you tell our listeners, mj, who are maybe going through a transition, right?
Speaker 2:
now, as you're going through a transition, remember that it's important to kind of again, like we've been saying, reflect on who you are and keep that close to you. Don't let whatever life is going to throw at you kind of change what that perspective looks like. As you're going through a life transition too, it's hard to have full confidence in what you're doing, but you're not going to be able to fully do it if you don't have confidence in yourself either, and that's hard. That's hard if you're navigating the space for the first time or doing something new or changing your career, you know altogether going into your first full-time position.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, yeah, I like that. You said, like the, you won't have confidence in the beginning, but having confidence in yourself. So, like the way I'm seeing that is having confidence in that you'll be able to figure it out along the way.
Speaker 2:
Yes, Because a lot of times I remember my first time looking at these gigantic you know gigantic job descriptions that make no damn sense and you don't even feel qualified for 20% of it. But you go into the interview anyway and you're like I think I can do this, after hearing some more about the position. And then you're there your first day and you're like I think I can do this and then I will do it. And then two months later you're killing it.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, yeah, it's that confidence that you'll figure it out. I think is key, because from what I've learned is that we're never going to be 100% confident before making a move.
Speaker 2:
No, absolutely not, Because there's so much uncertainty tied to it.
Speaker 1:
You have no idea what's going to happen.
Speaker 2:
What if it's the worst decision of your life?
Speaker 1:
Exactly. Or like for me just recently becoming a mom, or like for me just recently becoming a mom, had I sat there and like thought about am I ready to become a parent, am I going to be able to do this? I probably would never take that leap of faith right. Same thing with marriage. Like someone asked me one time like how did you know you were ready to be married or weren't you scared when you were getting married? And I was like no, because I knew that like I could figure it out, becoming a mom was a little bit more. It was was definitely scarier than like taking the leap to get married. But I would say that even with that like I now I always tell people you're never going to be 100% ready to have a kid. If, if that is something that you want to do, it's going to come with the fears and insecurities, but I think it's just knowing, trusting yourself, that you can figure it out.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, it's funny because I know you're talking about being a mom and you're changing your identity and your and your wedding, and I'm like over here thinking about the first time I was I taught a class. Yeah, oh my gosh, do you remember? I was like freaking out, I didn't even know if I could do it, if I was qualified enough, all of these different things. And then look here I am finally finishing my second year teaching. I've taught like four or five classes now. Yeah, isn't that insane? It's bananas, it's bananas, it's crazy.
Speaker 1:
Yeah. So I would say every move, we've made every move. Hello, starting a podcast, starting your own business starting your own brand yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2:
You never know where life's going to take you.
Speaker 1:
Truly truly and I would say like with each step you take I realized that we kind of evolve in that space. But you'll never grow to that version of yourself if you don't even take the leap. You know what I mean If you wait till you're ready. Quote, unquote one you're never going to be ready. And two the amount of learning that's going to happen after you take that leap. There's no way you could get to that level of learning until you take the move.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I'm just reflecting on our current full-time jobs. I remember when I took this job I had many people tell me like you're going to do great, like you're ready for this, you have this in the bag. And I was like I don't know about this. And I'm looking back almost two years later and I'm like I've grown so much and I wouldn't have known who I was going to be on the other side and if I would have thought about it too much, like you said, I wouldn't have probably done it. I would probably talked myself down, not would have applied and all these different things, or or made myself do bad in the interview. And you know, like all these different things, but I've grown so much and the opportunity has made me better for it whether good or bad, yeah, wow.
Speaker 1:
So, to all of our listeners out there, if you're going through a transition, whether that's you're a student, you're graduating or you're going to start college in the fall, or you are going to switch your job, or you're going to get married, or you're going to become a parent whatever life transition, you're gonna get married or you're gonna become a parent. Whatever life transition you're going through, I guess what we want to leave you with is that, with all the anxiety that comes with that, first of all, that's natural. And two, you're gonna come out of that with so much more self-awareness, so much, so much growth that's gonna come out of this next move that you're making. So have faith in yourself that you're gonna be able to figure it out, even though right now it's so scary.
Speaker 2:
Yeah beautifully said, armin. I couldn't have said it better myself.
