Andromeda By Kev
🌟Welcome to Andromeda Podcast, a podcast that explores the intricacies of life, love, and vulnerability through the lens of unique perspectives. Our show is a safe space where we dive deep into the human experience, sharing stories, insights, and advice that are both relatable and thought-provoking.
We believe that vulnerability is a strength and that by sharing our stories and experiences, we can inspire and empower others to do the same. Our goal is to create a community of like-minded individuals who are committed to living authentically and embracing all that life has to offer.
So if you're looking for a podcast that will challenge you, make you laugh, and leave you feeling inspired, then Andromeda is the show for you. Tune in to our weekly episodes and join the conversation – we can't wait to hear from you!
Andromeda By Kev
Beauty for Sale: Confessions of a Curvy Model In Los Angles
Have you ever felt the ground shift beneath you in the high-stakes world of influencer fame? That's the rollercoaster I found myself on, navigating the capricious nature of income and self-worth in an industry where beauty standards are as unstable as the stock market. In a candid conversation with Chiara, a former teacher turned social media strategist and model from Houston, we peel back the layers of glitz to reveal the raw truths of our personal journeys. Chiara's leap to viral fame began with a heartfelt tweet, and she joins us to share the ripple effects it had on her life, including the struggle to form genuine connections in a city as glossy and scrutinizing as LA.
Through our heart-to-heart, we confront the stark contrasts of the creative life—where one month could mean financial windfall and the next, radio silence. We tackle the daunting Hollywood beauty standards head-on, discussing the courage it takes to maintain one's self-worth when the goalposts keep moving. But it's not all uphill; our chat also celebrates the victories, like the thrill of seeing diverse models like those in Rihanna's Savage X Fenty show, which remind us of the power of representation. So, join us for this episode that's less about the perfect selfie and more about the imperfect, yet inspiring, reality of life behind the filter.
Beauty standards are always changing and they can't sell you something if they don't tell you something wrong with you. I remember being smaller, feeling like I was big, because at that time what big was has changed. What's acceptable has changed, and so like. Are you going to continue to change every time?
Speaker 2:You made it on the Billboard, you made it in magazine. You have the followers, you have the engagement on social media. Do you feel like, essentially, you made it?
Speaker 1:We don't know when it's gonna pop off. And I've had months where I've made 25 thousand dollars and the next month I made 0.00. Last week I kid you don't have any Thursday or Wednesday I was like boo booing like damn. So I go to school. Between yesterday and today I got six brand deals. I got invited to the CISA concert. I'm going to El Salvador. All expense paid. But I tell you, last week there was nothing. I was like I'm wrapping it up, I'm hanging up my jersey, bro.
Speaker 2:I seen something where there was like white influencers paid a lot more for brand deals, collaborations, things of that nature, compared to I seen this on sick talk compared to the black counterparts. We have the beautiful Chiara with us, so let's start off with Chiara. Where you from, who you are, what you do, let's go ahead and start with that.
Speaker 1:Oh, I am Chiara from Houston, texas, where Beyonce and Megan are from.
Speaker 2:Okay, me and.
Speaker 1:Rihanna got the same birthday, so a lot and I even, and I have a Leo Moon placement, so it just makes sense, right? I'm a model content creator, social media strategist, and a lot of people don't know that I actually used to be teaching for three years, so sometimes I still sub, sometimes I walk dogs. I just be getting money.
Speaker 2:That's the goal. The short time I've been out here is just like a bunch of hustlers. But let's dive into it though, like from sub to model, fashion over billboards, basically magazines. How did all this happen?
Speaker 1:for you. I think that, like so many people during the pandemic, it was like dang, let me figure out something. So I started off as a travel blogger. That's how I got like 5k when I was a senior in college and then the pandemic happened. I gained some weight. I started talking about it on Twitter, posting outfits on Twitter, and people just like gravitated towards it.
Speaker 2:So that's not how it happened really, so you just basically like started talking about your journey and it's hard to pick it up.
Speaker 1:Well, so I posted on Instagram like I'm broke, positive and stuff like that. But you know, like I really blew up because of Twitter and you got to kind of be a little messy with people on Twitter 100% I think I posted a picture of me in a bathing suit and I was like I thought a dude who said he don't want his girl but 200 pounds said something and it had like two million views all these week tweets.
Speaker 1:people like so yeah, then they all followed me on Instagram and then people started following me for like the things I wanted to follow me for.
Speaker 2:So you used the sing to no. Did you like to say singer?
Speaker 1:No senior Senior in college.
Speaker 2:Senior. Oh, I thought you said senior. I thought I said senior. You look like a singer a little bit.
Speaker 1:I know that's because I'm big. You said a big ass singer.
Speaker 2:Come on, come on now.
Speaker 1:Come on, I don't see you.
Speaker 2:You don't see him, so you look like you've seen, though, but let's dive into it like modeling in LA, this whole LA culture. You've been here for two years. Yeah, how's the culture to you?
Speaker 1:That's a hard question. I feel like I did teach here for one year, my first year.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 1:So I feel like I have a different perspective than a lot of people because people say, oh, la people ain't fake, you know. So that can be true, I think. But I really feel like people in LA, like what you think about California, like from the geography point it's so far from the rest of the United States I don't think that these black people over here are lost and like they just different type of black people who had the sun on them.
Speaker 1:They just a little different than the rest of all of us, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but I found it hard to kind of like make real friends. Of course, like dating could be difficult so, but it's always something to do with hard career wise, I think it's definitely like the land of opportunity. When you think about it. You drive around, you see so many mom and pops pop and board.
Speaker 2:You see a lot of places, a lot of immigrants. I know the gold rush was here.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know Hollywood was born here, so I think it's really a space for just opportunity.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So yeah.
Speaker 2:How has your dating for you been the past few years?
Speaker 1:I did a boyfriend now, okay, that's what I'm going to apply Everybody around the class.
Speaker 2:That's the gold. Crack it up I don't know about.
Speaker 1:Deagle, but it was cool. He's very supportive, very cool, but before that it was kind of wild, yeah. But yeah, he's also a creative and that can't even be difficult. I was very against it. Like I'm used to dating engineer pharmacists because I'm like. I need somebody to stay in the club you stay with typical or yeah, I think it's like worse than me. Yeah, but he the checks, he be going to work, the check be coming in.
Speaker 2:We good, yeah, so you feel like it's tough to be like a creative, like as far as we're all tracing this dream, but it's not as consistent as a nine to five income check, but when you make it big they come. So how you, how you feel about that though?
Speaker 1:I find it very difficult to grapple with because one I was going to be a lawyer at one point and after, like I think about the respect aspect of it. It's sometimes like it's a difference. When I tell somebody I'm an influencer, you see a face like, oh yeah, I'm studying to be a lawyer. You're like, oh wow, that's great. So I think, like for me that part has been difficult. All my friends are kind of selling into their careers, so that could be difficult. We don't know when it's going to pop off, and I've had months where I've made 25,000 dollars and the next month I made 0.00 dollars.
Speaker 1:And so like how do you make that stretch?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's difficult.
Speaker 2:But it's, you know, it's crazy that, like I think we live in a new time where it's okay to be creative Like what you do now, the impact you have now, 20 years ago that it wasn't possible For sure.
Speaker 1:If you get what I'm saying, like just through your social media reach, which is dope- yeah, I think for me, with that though, like last week I kid you don't have any Thursday or Wednesday I was like boo-hooing, like damn, should I go to school? When, I kid you, yesterday, between yesterday and today, I got six brand deals. I got invited to the CISA concert. I'm going to El Salvador, all expense paid. But I tell you, last week there was nothing. I was like I'm back with it, I'm hanging up my jersey, bro, because what the hell? And so I think you have to remember that when you're in the valley, that the hills are worth it and that everything that you're doing like somebody is seeing it.
Speaker 2:I feel like we forget that. Wow, no, that's so. Let's talk about that, though. From boo-hoo to six deals, right?
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:How did that happen? For you Like what changed, what happened, what just?
Speaker 1:Anything changed? To be honest, even when I'm feeling real low, if I'm feeling negative or whatever like that, I still post, I still show up, I'm still talking. I was still in meetings feeling like damn, I don't know if they're going to pick me, and I still show up like I'm very. People say, oh, I love your confidence or whatever, like I'm more brave than confident. I'm scared as hell. Because, especially as a model, they tell you hey, we got seven other girls who look just like you, we replace you. Right, real quick right.
Speaker 1:And so I still making those connections. So I think that, like, everything that I've been doing is just it's time for it to hit Quarter four brand spending more money. We see you working. Hey girl, what's up? You know what I mean. So I think that, like, you don't know when your name is already on a list. You just need to keep showing up.
Speaker 2:You got to do what you got to do, so that's fire advice for one. Two In LA is like beauty standards.
Speaker 1:For sure.
Speaker 2:Plastic surgery are just that, that type of look right and for you to show up every day, be confident, have a big influence, like how, like what. What advice would you give to others who maybe aren't as confident, who maybe look like you or who maybe not even necessarily look like you but don't fit the traditional beauty standards of Hollywood?
Speaker 1:I have a whole bunch of thoughts about that.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:One like again. I'm fighting that battle every day in my own heart, right? I think that when you grow up seeing people who like breast-dolls, I don't look like a breast-doll. Yeah, they were more mixed and diverse than Barbie, but I'm still not light-skinned like Yasmin. She was like had Asian eyes. You know, and I think that it's just knowing in your heart that even if I don't feel my best today, if I don't feel as pretty as somebody don't see it, that doesn't make it a fact Like. The fact is, I'm beautiful, period.
Speaker 1:I can feel bad. I can feel however I want to feel. Today are in this moment, or they can, and other people's opinion means not also affect or any of my business. So I feel like that's one thing that I really try to actually say to myself when I start feeling bad. I have shit to do, I'll be like girl we don't got time for this I talk to myself like a friend, like girl do you got time for that?
Speaker 1:You don't got time for this negativity because you got other shit to do or like let yourself cry for that moment. But I think again, beauty standards are always changing and they can't sell you something if they don't tell you something wrong with you. I remember growing up my little sister gorgeous she's like maybe five years darkening me. People used to make fun of her all the time. Now it's oh my God, your skin so pretty right. So the standard is always going to change. I remember being smaller, feeling like I was big, because at that time what big was has changed was acceptable has changed.
Speaker 1:So like are you going to continue to change every time? You know we also said pretty hurts. They tell you to lose weight, they tell you to gain weight. So like, what are you going to do? How are you going to stick to your own standard? Like in your heart, I feel like that's what I try to remind myself.
Speaker 2:So basically it's like if you got a dream, you got to go for it. Period, Fuck it.
Speaker 1:No, you know what, though? I feel like if I was ugly, so what? Okay, if I am big, I'm going to still get it anyway. If I don't deserve it, I'm going to still get it. It's always somebody who's not talented, who don't deserve shit, who get in it, who are not even good people, so why not you? I feel like that's like, why not me? Is a big thing too. I know I was talking the other day I just want to be a rapper, which is so funny, but I was like I'm too big to be a rapper, lizard's rapping. Then I'm like I used to be super religious. I'm from Texas, I'm not at all anymore, but the time, oh, I had to rap about this. I don't want to rap about Christianity. And then there's this girl named Juan Day who's a huge Christian rapper.
Speaker 1:So it's like every reason I say I can't do something, there was somebody turning around and doing it and killing it. So I'm like, damn, maybe I should just try.
Speaker 2:Yeah, let me get a bar.
Speaker 1:I'll do it, oh great.
Speaker 2:You got, you got, you got, you got, you got, you got. I didn't mean to put you on the spot like that, but that's inspiring, though. That's very, that's very inspiring. I don't think you even know how, how like inspirational you are. I appreciate that you don't. I feel like sometimes we just live in our in our own little bubble that we don't know, right, we don't know, but I guarantee you there's a couple of girls out there who's trying, and guys right, yeah, is there's beauty standards for men as well, right? So who are trying and is like do I fit this mode? Maybe, maybe not, but to see somebody doing it, it looks good, it is good. So what's next for you, though?
Speaker 1:That's a great question. When I was thinking about today so. I don't have social media management. I have two people who offer me a deal. Don't know which one I want to go with. I don't know if either one is a good decision. I've been signed to a modeling agency before I left.
Speaker 2:What type of deal are you talking about? Social media management?
Speaker 1:is separate from modeling.
Speaker 2:OK.
Speaker 1:And so like they will handle all my brand deals like, say, walmart, amazon. Anybody like that want to hit me up for me post social. Yeah they'll be in charge of that and there's a lot of opportunity to be lucrative over there.
Speaker 2:Facts.
Speaker 1:So that's kind of what that's about, because it's separate from modeling, because modeling, if I go in person, you know- you can come. That's my modeling agency who handles that. And I had modeling agencies I wasn't comfortable with. So I'm not so I don't know. I was thinking about moving to Bali four months. I really literally don't know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so yeah, why Bali though?
Speaker 1:Actually, one of my close friends quit her job recently and we met in Bali and it was like five years ago. So let's just go to Bali for a month. I was going to Columbia for six months learning Spanish, but it's like all the money is here to like hustle and bustle, but I've been wanting to escape it. I just don't know if I'm far enough from my career to do that Can. I just come back, or can I post about that and people still be interested? So, I don't know, I literally don't know.
Speaker 2:I feel that it's what. So I want to go back to the six brand deals. Right, even Norris, yeah, because that is huge. That is, believe it or not, and what it like. How do you, how would somebody go about getting these brand deals? No for sure. Who's? Who's trying, who's posting, who's consistent? How does that happen for them?
Speaker 1:Close miles don't get fit.
Speaker 1:Like you have to think about it too. The people who work at, I don't know, let's say, american apparel or whatever I'm not even opening anymore American apparel he was this American, good American, there you go, like they're just people, so they also have to do the work and find an influencer. So if you feel like you fit that mode, ask them. They're like yes, one less person. I have to find Two other people who I spoke to this week already yesterday I genuinely didn't even think you were responding to me and I get this random like over. One feel like, well, they don't respond whatever I send an email. I got to respond to 10 minutes, yeah, and I'm like dang, oh, maybe I am cool, I okay, and then I also try not to let that like validate me, but it's hard not to let that type of stuff validate you.
Speaker 1:So I think, just trying like you don't know, don't you?
Speaker 2:don't you work yourself up to a level for that, though, right For sure, I think what you said it being consistent? Yeah, I'm not going to lie.
Speaker 1:I didn't apply. I'm not saying that you have to do this. I didn't apply for any agencies. And so I finally, after two years, posted every day for 30 days that was so hard for me and that I've done that I realized that I actually need to do 90 days because some agencies actually for 90 days worth of work. Like, what have you done in the last 90 days? And so I was like, let me prove to myself that I can be consistent, because, even though other people want to outside might feel like I am, I know in my heart I wasn't doing it.
Speaker 1:I wasn't doing even the type of content that I wanted to be known for all the time. Right, I want to be known more from my voice and what I have to say. So I can't do makeup and I got a camera and I just said, hey, I can't really do my own makeup, but here I am and people really liked it. And so I think, just trying and being consistent and doing the stuff that you resonate with because people right now are looking for like real people- yeah, you should start podcast.
Speaker 1:So funny. I got 10,000 things to do. It's so funny, though. Last week I literally said I will do more podcasts in a meeting with an agency. They didn't. My friend in me up she was like, oh, this is my guy.
Speaker 2:So you manifested this.
Speaker 1:It was really. I'm telling y'all know what happened last week with him tears, it's worse.
Speaker 2:So they were like I don't know how, but that is crazy Now, but you believe in like manifestation.
Speaker 1:Absolutely yeah.
Speaker 2:Is that something you're actively you actively do, or just more so?
Speaker 1:Yeah. I believe in it and in the beginning of the year I really was like hey, down with it for sure.
Speaker 2:But recently I've been kind of like falling off and I really want to get into like adrenaline and taking some time in the morning just to think, because I do think that, like, what we say is real is real and get into our body, but do you feel like you falling off on it and then all these opportunities come in as a part of it, like not not focusing so much on it and just letting it flow?
Speaker 1:No, I do be focused. So I was crying. I'm not letting it flow. If I was doing that, I'll be good, I'm like it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen. Nah, I'll be like whoop. I'm gonna give up my feelings, probably tired to be, but I think it's so important to speak life over yourself, you know.
Speaker 2:But, again.
Speaker 1:I think my point is even when you don't believe it, still try. Like other people out here trying so with no talent or whatever the case may be, I feel that so what?
Speaker 2:what advice would you, would you give to somebody who's about to move to LA? About to move to LA? They have a vision of being a model, right, plus size model, in a sense. What would you tell them right now?
Speaker 1:show. Take your digital. Have you done that? Like? I feel like that's people forget that that's so important. People always say, oh, like, I have to have 10,000 followers or even thousand followers or whatever to get some. One of my friends who signed to my agency I think she has 600 followers Because she applied. So I think again like, if you don't let people tell excuse me, don't tell yourself no. Like don't take yourself out the race. You can't. If you don't even put yourself in the end of the pool, how you gonna win? You're not. So I think that's the first thing is Taking the digital post on Instagram, tagging the brands like, what are you do? Like, when you say you want to do something, what have you done today to get towards that? I will say that's one thing that I consistently do every month. It's like I wrote my goals now in the beginning of the year and I'm like what am I doing Literally every day to get towards that?
Speaker 1:and I can say this I'm not stuck to and I've seen the fruits of the labor 10 months later.
Speaker 2:So you tag brands that you don't have deals with yet on your post?
Speaker 1:I do and it really kind of depends on do I want to work with them, to, though, like I have reached out to them and they have like refused and I still love them. I'm not saying it Sorry, but if I haven't reached out or anything like that, yeah, like for sure people like oh are you this week right here.
Speaker 2:People don't know.
Speaker 1:We all they won't respond, baby, nobody gonna know where to win from then, cuz I love this here.
Speaker 2:Hey, they got me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and it's not cuz I'm like gay, like no, pay me, you need me on the side, I'll tell you. Oh, I always think about this. To think like no doesn't mean no, no mean to ask somebody else, like this brand saying no, okay, I asked another one. This person said no, that's cool, I'm asking another one. So two things go hand in hand. It's like no doesn't mean no, no, me X somebody else, and all you need is one. Yes, you need one husband, you need one agency, you need one good opportunity. You don't need everybody to tell you yeah, so those go hand in hand.
Speaker 2:So I think that's what I was, okay. So that that is another question for me. What? What does, what does being a model mean to you?
Speaker 1:That's really good question I've never pondered upon. I think it is being the representation right. Something that's super interesting is it's probably talking to. I know that probably she. It makes sense. I'd never really like big news. But then Rihanna had that savage X minty show yeah, like three, and he was. I was like whoa. I never thought about it. You know what I mean. I never thought about that something I could be attracted to because they, you know, cover up why the media covered them up or don't make them seem as sexual or as appealing, and so.
Speaker 1:I think like being a model is being a representation. Like people see me and they say I'm like a walking billboard. Honestly, even just now on the hallway and somebody say where you get to the front, where you get this from like three people, and I'm like I think that's what it is, like you can dress sexy and have bigger boobs and not be sexualized, right or you can still be beautiful or whatever the case may be, like you are their representation.
Speaker 1:I feel like that's like you're modeling what it looks like to a regular girl to have it on right.
Speaker 2:I want to dive deep into that, but that's fucking. Let's do it so. So, with that being said, why is it then that most brands Try to pick and pick conventionally, whatever is Style, not stylish, whatever the beauty trend is of that generation, to model their items?
Speaker 1:Cool. I have a couple of thoughts that came to my head. My boyfriend is a photographer. He shoots, though architectural stuff, so he does architectural digest and stuff like that, but he be on set with like Linman and all this stuff and I do post a lot of my model photos have been Elandre, which is why me and Savage X50 like this right, and so he was like Key, the person who was saying yesterday it's not the influencer marketing girl, that's the 60 year old white man or the 50 year old white woman. They're the ones like yeah, I like that. I like the people who are picking out at Target and Macy's. There are older people who just have a different mindset of what they feel like is what you're supposed to look like.
Speaker 1:When I first got signed, they told me I need to wear my hair in an effer.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:And so I feel like and she was like, that's what those palm color people, that's what they want to see. So I think that is kind of what it why. Because there are a lot of people who are in control of this industry that we don't see, who are kind of still picking from an archaic way, because in the US the women wear 14, that's the average size for a woman, not a six, not a 10. And so I just think that there's people who are stuck in their ways and sometimes we do have to kind of spark it towards them and so we can make our own stage and do what we want to do.
Speaker 2:That's deep. Everybody round of applause for that one. I'm back in the Nah gee, that was a good one. It's like if the person's picking is old, white and pale no offense to old, white and pale men but then it's gonna be for those who don't look like them. They might not be as reluctant to pick that right, or if that's not their type.
Speaker 1:For sure. One insecurity that I have as a model and I really do carry is when I do see models or even actresses. With two notices she will see a bald girl that's dark skin, or a light skin girl with big hair.
Speaker 1:And for me. I'm like round away, she could live down the street from me, type of girl Like that and it's very pretty sure. But it's like I don't fit those two extreme modes right. And then you see people like preciously, who was from Atlanta, georgia, walking for Dior right, and so brown skin, big titties, looks like an African American girl. Again, representation. I saw that and I'm like dang, maybe I can do that.
Speaker 2:I never thought about it before Facts. I think the biggest thing here is that we, our people, need to get in more doors right For sure that's beyond the model and beyond the face of things, right Beyond the sports and behind the scenes.
Speaker 1:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:Because behind the scenes is what's controlling everything the sports world, the entertainment world, hollywood. It's like we see these faces, but it's behind the scenes that's really controlling it all.
Speaker 1:But no, I mean, you're right. I was gonna say last week was Savage Expensives and, honestly, the stylist, the prostitute, the makeup, everybody was black and I'm like, okay, read, read, this is pretty, I felt good about it so, and I've been on set, so I'm like the only black person I've cried on my hair by my hair, on set, so like you cry a lot.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they cry, but you're Pisces so it makes sense.
Speaker 1:I don't cry a lot, but if you stress me, imagine you think you have to that one. You're talking about the one that's in the airport, that big bib, or that wig oh my God, there's a hole in that wig. Now that man made in my wig and that wig went cheap. You know, that wasn't even why I cried. So yeah, that's something else.
Speaker 2:The big thing about LA and when a lot of people come here, it's to chase this dream and it's to become something. And they're trying to chase something, right? You made it on a Billboard, you made it in a magazine. You have the followers, you have the engagement on social media. Do you feel like, essentially, you made it as a model? No, no, okay.
Speaker 1:That's so funny, cause, like one thing, I don't know who said this. They're like I don't care how many accolades you see, I'm still need help.
Speaker 1:Cause at the end of the day also, like you said, I'm the face. What about the producer of the show? Is that person in black Like who's calling the shots? Like no. So there are so many things I want to do in my career as an influencer. I want to be a writer. There's so many things that I want to do so I will say, like, just moving it. Let's say you just moved here, you know nobody calling you back, nothing. You didn't beat 90% of people who were sitting at home just thinking they wished they could do it.
Speaker 1:You know, what I mean. So, like you've already, are ahead of the game, you already in a space. This is the land of opportunity and I'm a big believer in proximity principle. It's like somebody say, especially as a plus size woman, like how do you date men that make over a hundred K? Proximity principle I went to Howard with a whole bunch of people around me who are nurses, doctors and lawyers. So now I live in LA with people who are influencers and producers, so I'm touching shoulders with them. I'm going to those events. I pay for a conference this weekend. Honestly, I wasn't gonna pay for it Cause I'm not used to paying for stuff.
Speaker 1:No more, I'll let you know what is worth it, so I invested into that. That's a business fence anyway, and I rub shoulders with the people who I want to be like, so I think that that's super important. Just being in a space getting there is literally 50%, showing up 50% at work, is not it?
Speaker 2:So I feel like for you, based off the answers, it doesn't matter what pinnacle you reach. You're always gonna want more.
Speaker 1:I mean for sure.
Speaker 2:That's basically what you just said, but.
Speaker 1:I don't feel like Made. It is crazy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Made it is crazy, Made it. You just said you was trying last month.
Speaker 1:I'm working Like I don't even know Again. I'm defining for myself what is success Like?
Speaker 1:what makes me successful model. Personally, I'm not working as a model, at minimum, like four times a month, which is one time a week, transparent, that's about $3,000 for one day, and I'm not there, I'm getting like I think last month I made two, which was good, that's $6,000. But cool, what if nothing else happens? Well, you know, and so for me, I'm trying to define what that looks like, and I would want to be working a whole bunch more as a model, a whole bunch more paid brand deals. A lot of the stuff is unpaid, you know, as an influencer and again, like a lot of, as black people. They don't be trying to pay us, they try to undercut us. I've been just telling people straight up no, I can't take on any more unpaid work because I'm just too busy, and so I feel like to me, I would make it one. I make a count, always at a certain level.
Speaker 2:What's that level? I don't know I really don't know what's the level you feel like your bank account needs to be at to feel like I'm comfortable.
Speaker 1:I can't even capture you. I would say this one thing is that you know, I feel like what God has for me. I can't even think about how big it is.
Speaker 2:I love that.
Speaker 1:Right, I mean who is like. I want to make sure, like if I could pay my momma rent and my rent you bother me. I feel like I'm cool and honestly I just want to really get. I don't even want to pay her rent. I want to give her a big down payment where it's really comfortable for her, for her to pay for it. She's gonna be teaching.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, but so like I feel like doing those type of things, will make me feel like all right. I'm just now starting to feel like, yeah, I'm going on all this paid cruise. I'm like, okay, but they ain't pay me to be there though, you know. And it's like I don't want to sound ungrateful, because I am, but I am grateful. Here we go. I am grateful, but there's so many more things.
Speaker 2:You know, I seen something where it was like white influencers, not necessarily even models, but influencers get a lot paid a lot more for for brand deals, collaborations, things of that nature compared to I seen this on TikTok compared to their black counterparts.
Speaker 1:Okay. So let me say this I'm at a dinner.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I might have to say the brand, because I still work. This brand cause brand be due.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But we all know them very, very well. They have super fast shipping. That's all I'm saying. If you know that, you know okay.
Speaker 2:I know that I don't even know who she's talking about. Okay.
Speaker 1:We're at dinner with some white people, some white girls, and they say oh my God, this brand is so crazy. They wanted $30,000 for five pictures. Being like me and other black girls like $30,000. Like, that's how you know that move that sound on TikTok, y'all getting paid, like that's how we felt, Like I'm like dang, that's a lot of money and she's saying like that's nothing and so that's absolutely for sure happening.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, cause also, like a lot of us just wanna be in a space, including myself sometimes, you know, and so it's like, will you take no money? Will you take a little bit of money? Cause just to say you were there, cause like they don't want to pay you. But then you realize, like I got five pictures of you on the Instagram and on their website.
Speaker 2:So it's like Whoa, what's going on here?
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's crazy, but it is what it is. I think that's the beauty of being black, is that sometimes we just gotta thug it out? We got a granite, and without that we wouldn't be who we are. That makes sense too, so, but anyway, before we keep this thing, keep on going longer and longer. You're cracking me up. All right, ladies and gentlemen, thank you for tuning in. This was a wonderful episode. Thank you for joining us. I appreciate you. Hope you have fun and we tune in now. Peace, peace out.