Transforming Life Through Mindset Mastery: Paul Gencarella Jr. on Positive Outlook and Success Strategies

Unlock the secrets to transforming your life with the power of mindset in our latest episode! We’re excited to have Paul Gencarella Jr., the brilliant mind behind Mindset Mastery, share his expert insights. Learn how shifting your mindset can lead to profound personal and professional growth, and hear Paul's compelling story about a family health crisis that underscores the critical importance of a positive outlook.

Discover the daily practices that can rewire your brain for success. From journaling to gratitude exercises, Paul and I discuss actionable strategies to reprogram your subconscious mind. We also explore the necessity of taking imperfect actions and the emotional commitment required to build lasting habits. Using the analogy of a thermostat, we demonstrate how changing your mental set point can lead to sustained life improvements.

Get ready to rethink your financial goals and work relationships. Paul’s wisdom on believing in oneself, leveraging mentors, and setting detailed financial goals offers a roadmap to financial success. Additionally, we tackle the complexities of workplace dynamics and why a positive attitude can drastically improve your interactions and overall well-being. Don’t miss this episode packed with practical advice and inspiring stories to help you master your mindset for better health, wealth, and relationships!

To learn more about Paul, visit:

http://www.mindsetmastery.speakdreamlisten.com/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/paul-gencarella-jr-self-image-advisor-25519519b/
https://www.instagram.com/gencarellajr.paul/
https://www.facebook.com/paul.gencarella
https://www.twitter.com/paulgencarella/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfARPgcMXExsWNBhvn3gNxA

To learn more about Mindy CLICK HERE

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:07

hey, friends, this is your host, mindy duff, and you're listening to up level your life with mindy, your number one personal growth podcast that will bring you closer to uncovering your greatest self. As a certified holistic health and nutrition coach, I created this podcast for anyone who desires to improve physically, emotionally and spiritually. I'll be interviewing experts and sharing tips and tricks that have helped not only my clients, but that have guided me on my own transformational journey. I believe that we all have a greatness that lies within. We just need to uncover it. Are you ready to level up? Then let's begin. Hi everyone and welcome back to Uplevel your Life with Mindy. I am your host, mindy Duff, and today I'm going to be chatting with Paul Jencarella Jr. I practice this too, darn it.

Speaker 2: 1:11

You did fine.

Speaker 1: 1:14

And we are going to be talking about something I'm actually pretty excited for. Today we're going to be talking a lot about mindset, and I am pretty obsessed with mindset. I know that it's just to me, I think it's like the biggest thing in your life if you want to make positive changes. So I'm always interested to get another person's opinion on that, especially Paul's, because here's a little bit about Paul. He's the founder of Mindset Mastery, an expert speaker, coach and self-image advisor, which is interesting. Paul shows how shifting your mindset to focus on positive outcomes enables professionals to achieve remarkable personal growth and business incorporations to better themselves. Paul's goal is to help folks who want to help themselves in the areas of health, wealth and relationships. He has experienced firsthand how hardships and challenging circumstances in life can take their toll, but how mastering your mind is the key. So welcome Paul.

Speaker 2: 2:10

Good to be here, Mindy. I appreciate the introduction. You should be on like the Late Show there you go, you're good, you're good, you don't have to get this out there.

Speaker 1: 2:20

I do what I can.

Speaker 2: 2:22

Well, the Italian names you're going to have a tough time with. Yes, yeah, I'm, I do what I can.

Speaker 1: 2:26

Well, the Italian names you're going to have a tough time with. Yes, yeah, I'm the opposite of. Italian, so it doesn't come naturally.

Speaker 2: 2:30

I'm half Irish, believe it or not.

Speaker 1: 2:32

So I'm Italian and Irish Awesome.

Speaker 2: 2:35

Yes.

Speaker 1: 2:36

Makes for a good mindset. There you go. So I alluded to this in your bio, just a little bit about kind of what you do. But can you just in a nutshell? I alluded to this in your bio just a little bit about kind of what you do. But can you just, in a nutshell, I like to hear in people's own words, what do you tell us a little bit about yourself and what it is that you do?

Speaker 2: 2:58

Yeah, I started right out of college in the insurance business and I was in there for 25 years and then I kind of made a huge shift to the personal growth and development industry. Not that I was unfamiliar with it, but I really didn't know it well. And once I got to know it well, it really was getting to know yourself. Mindy, it's knowing who you are, what you are, what you want in life. The only limitations we have is what we put on ourselves. But what we put on ourselves is a paradigm that those that that is in there. We have to shift that paradigm and we don't know how to do that and that's why people get to a certain point and they turn around.

Speaker 2: 3:35

So what, how I've gotten in this industry is? You know I had a few challenges that we can get into down a bit, but really it's achievement. And you had mentioned you know you seem to be a little bit intrigued by the title self-image advisor. Well, you know it can be a fancy title. The point is, in order for us to grow, we have to improve our self-image. We cannot outperform our self-image, it's impossible and we can only do as what our self-image encompasses us to do, and that can be difficult for some people. So that's essentially an intro for me.

Speaker 1: 4:20

Yeah, I love that. And now you mentioned that and I alluded to it again in your bio that you have had some challenges and I think that your challenges are very unique and interesting and I would love if you would just kind of dive into that a little bit.

Speaker 2: 5:06

We all have challenges, right, we all have a story. You know we all have ups and downs. You know mine just came, you know, on a whim, my five-year back porch and the chair fell over three steps and he collapsed onto the concrete, smashed his head, cut his eye. And you know my wife was alarmed. She's like, oh my goodness. You know she was watching our three-year-old at the time and she took him to the doctor. The doctor's like listen, the vision's fine, it's not gonna be a problem with his eye, it Just an actual minor scrape, don't worry about it. So we're like fine, thank God.

Speaker 2: 5:27

So two days later, friday it was a Friday he mentioned to us that he had peed blood in the toilet and we said, oh boy. So my wife and I immediately think it's just a contusion from the fall or something. So we went to the hospital and the hospital did their ultrasound, unbeknownst to us. They sent us up to the children's hospital in the city, which we thought was protocol. But what we didn't realize was that fall ruptured a cancerous tumor growing on his kidney. And you know, I went to the emergency room doctor and he's like yeah, see the healthy kidney here and this is the one that's affected and I said oh OK. I said, all right, can you play soccer tomorrow? He's like why don't we go in this room over here? So at that point I started to think, ok, we're going into a room with comfortable furniture, kleenexes all around. I said Betty to my wife. I said things aren't good. She's pretty talking about. I said our son's got cancer. She's like no way Doctor comes in. So I said so he's got cancer. They said whoa, whoa, slow down. So I said no, we're not going to flip out. I said you know, lay it on us. He's like yeah, he, he does in fact have a stage one Wilms tumor on his kidney. However, because of the fall, we caught it early. We believe he's had this his whole life and it seems to be contained. And so they did an operation that Monday and they removed the kidney and now he had to go through 37 weeks of cancerous chemotherapy treatments at a five-year-old.

Speaker 2: 7:00

It wasn't the easiest thing to go through inside a five-year-old. It wasn't the easiest thing to go through. The challenge that my wife and I had was we both wanted to cry and go into a ball, you know, but you can't. You got two other kids and you have a five-year-old that's scared out of his wits. We just kept an upbeat attitude and we used the cancer word around them. We didn't, you know, shelter anything and just treated it like it was normal. And you know, I mean that helped a bit and it kind of helped us get through it. And, granted, we had each other, we had the family of the community. Support was great.

Speaker 2: 7:28

But it was about a month later, mindy, where I'm sitting on the couch watching Sunday night football and my wife's at work at a second job, at a restaurant, and the kids are sleeping, and I'm like how the heck did this happen? You know, I mean it's crazy that this. And so I kind of, you know, checked myself and it turns out I found that I had testicular cancer because of him. You know what I mean. I checked myself. So he basically saved my life and I think when he realized that I was diagnosed with the same thing that he had, he was like almost elated. He's like, hey, dad, what's going to be? Okay, you know what I mean. It's like here we go, I'm my five-year-old comforting me. You know what I mean.

Speaker 2: 8:05

So it was, it was fantastic in that respect and it was truly a blessing and we we got through that, unbeknownst to me at the time, mindy, I had no idea about mindset and all this, you know, positive thinking affirmations. I just subconsciously, you know, went through that. It was just upbeat, as was my wife, and that got us through. Looking back, studying this now, I'm like geez, this is a great story as an example for listeners that are going through a health issue or a disability, an injury or some type of relationship issue. How can we put this thing back together? You know what I mean. It's not just going out there being positive, it's going out there living the action. You know what I mean, and that's hard to do when you're going through it. The time to treat depression isn't when you're depressed, it's when you're feeling good and you build an arsenal of things, tactics and strategies to help you when you're going through that. So that's one of the stories.

Speaker 1: 9:10

Yeah, yeah, that's an incredible story and thank you for sharing that. And now can we say that your son is healthy and doing great. Yeah, yes.

Speaker 2: 9:20

Yeah, he's a 20-year-old that's going to be in business. He's in a business college right now. He's going to be studying in Spain in the fall. So it's not so much that we're worried about his health, we're worried about what he does, because he's a knucklehead like his dad. You know what I mean. He was back in college.

Speaker 1: 9:42

So he's, a healthy college student.

Speaker 2: 9:44

We'll leave it at that. You know he was back in college. So he's a healthy college student, believe it. We'll leave it at that, you know for sure.

Speaker 1: 9:47

Well, that's good, and I'm sure all the listeners are grateful for his health and for your health as well. And now I'm just. I'm curious. Throughout this whole experience and other challenges in your life, do you always keep a positive mindset or do you ever catch yourself slipping into? You know, poor me, and why did this happen? And if you do, how do you? What do you do? How do you get out of that?

Speaker 2: 10:11

Yeah, you know that. That's that's the critical point and, as I alluded to before, you can't treat it when you're going through it. You know what I mean. It's just it's like it's the roof needs to be fixed. It's too late to fix it when it's rainy, you know what I mean, and when it's sunny it doesn't need fixing. You know that's Jim Rohn who says this.

Speaker 2: 10:27

But me, yes, it happens to me all the time. But, mindy, because I study this an hour a day, it doesn't happen as much as it used to. Tony Robbins used to say, yeah, you got to chalk it up. The guy had a bad day Give's like me. For Tony Robbins, I may have a bad moment because he's so locked into his mindset.

Speaker 2: 10:48

So it's what you do to prepare yourself. It's like the professional athletes practice in and out. So come game time, they're ready and that's why they're making the three-pointers and the foul shots that they need to make or making the pass that they need to make. So for me it's every single morning, whether I like it or not, one through 10, I'm in the journal, which I hated the journal when I first started.

Speaker 2: 11:12

I'm like I don't want to write anything, what this are, but I started doing that one through 10 things that I'm grateful for today and it turned into one through five things that I'm grateful for that have happened in six through 10 things that are going to happen that I'm grateful for. You know what I mean, whether it be a monetary thing, whether it be a relationship thing, whether it's to meet someone or whatever have you, and that just floods your subconscious mind, which builds the paradigm to shift into that. So it's a process. It really is a process, but it's a fun process. You're going to live anyway. Why don't live the proper way? You know what I mean and that's the way I've started going about it too late for that moment.

Speaker 2: 12:05

Sometimes you just need to. It's not that it's too late, it's harder to get out of it at that point.

Speaker 1: 12:07

You know what I mean. Yeah, so you're better off setting yourself up for success by continually working on this and not just oh, I'm in a great mood, I don't need to worry about my mindset, that's later's problem. Well, you could have a lot less problem later if you worked on it consistently like you're doing. And I would imagine that that probably doesn't take a great amount of time just to do that gratitude exercise.

Speaker 2: 12:29

No, mindy, I have a goal, a long-term goal that's like out of this world, like if you don't know how to do the goal, that's the goal you want, like you know something that's crazy, like that. I have a goal that I write every day. I do the 10 grateful gratitude exercises and then, throughout the day, I have a three-hour alarm on my phone which is a pain in the neck because I'm involved in something. I got to say my affirmation of my goal or what have you, or an I am statement. I have about seven or eight I am statements statement. I have about seven or eight I am statements. But this, these are just little little things but compounded day in after day in you're instituting on on your subconscious mind. You know what I mean Positivity, and you have to act on it. You can't just sit on the couch and expect it all to come and happen. You know what I mean. You really need to act on it, and it doesn't have to be perfect action, because there is no such thing.

Speaker 1: 13:27

Yeah, yeah, that's a good. It doesn't have to be perfect action. Just sometimes just doing something even if you're like. Well, I don't know if I should do A or B, just pick one, and then you'll know after you do it, and then you can make a better decision next time. Yeah.

Speaker 2: 13:40

I love that Walk in the road. Take it, yes, yeah, don't worry about where to left. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 13:47

So when you're looking for a permanent life change, whether that be you know we mentioned health and wealth and relationships. Those are the three biggies that everybody seems to want to improve on. That's kind of what makes up the bulk of our lives, if you really get down to it. So why is thinking more important than our behavior? We're in a very action-oriented society. You need to go and do, but why is thinking more important to you?

Speaker 2: 14:14

Yeah, because it's all related. It goes thought, feeling, action. Action gives us a result. And if we just change our behavior and you have a person that's 50 pounds overweight and they lose the 50 pounds and they didn't change their thought or their mindset, that weight's going to eventually come back on. You know what I mean and that's what happens. You know what I mean the mindset changed. It's like changing the thermostat on the wall, because you know if it's set to a certain temperature on the wall, you open the door in the winter it's going to drop, but then kick back on and raise to that temperature. So it's automatically going to be set to that until you change your mindset. That's changing the set point on the thermometer in really what you want to do, and then you become habitualized. You know it takes a while. Some people it takes two weeks, other people it takes, you know, two years for crying out loud. You know what I mean to go through it and you just have to ingrain the habit.

Speaker 2: 15:14

You know for me it was difficult back in 2001 to go to the gym at 5am, but I found that the only time I could work out was when I was sleeping. You know what I mean Four o'clock in the afternoon in the summer is just not a good time to work out because there's always something going on. So I got in the habit of going to the gym every morning and now I don't even have an alarm clock. I wake up at 4.30 every morning and I'm off to the gym. But I ingrained that habit. It didn't happen overnight.

Speaker 2: 15:45

So these are things that what your question was. It's, yes, it's behavior. But we first have to become, you know, emotionalized with it. That thought we need to become emotional because, if we're not, when things get difficult, heck with it. I don't go to the gym every day because I hope I get fat. You know what I mean. I go to the gym because I want to stay in shape. You know what I mean. And that's the greater good. You know I will say in the winter I have a couple extra ice cream sandwiches that probably don't work with my waistline.

Speaker 1: 16:14

But you know what I?

Speaker 2: 16:14

mean. But the point is it's a give and take. It's, you know, ebbs and flows, you know, and that's generally behavior needs to be coming from your thought with emotionalized. You need to get excited about it. You know. Why do you want to have a better marriage? Why do you want to have a better relationship with your kids? What are you going to do if you have a better relationship? What are the things that you want?

Speaker 2: 16:35

You know you got to get excited about it, like I am in this podcast. You know what I mean. You have to, you really have to become emotional and you have to, you have to, you really have to become emotional. And that sometimes takes your imagination to think. We can use our imaginations to get scared and to get worried and to be like, oh my goodness, if that happens, this is good. You know, we do a good job at that. How about imagining a good thing and wondering, oh my goodness, if that? And that's how you can get motivated sometimes and you need to keep that alive with more reasons. That helps the how, that helps my goal. That I have no idea how to do, but when I put all the reasons in there, it figures out the how.

Speaker 1: 17:12

Yeah, yeah, I like that. So what about these limiting beliefs that that pop up or just like negative self-talk, because that's pretty common, even this morning? Gosh, I wonder if I can think of a concrete example. I, um, I am not blaming this on my child, this was my choice, but I caught his bad mood this morning. I woke up in a neutral mood. He woke up not in a neutral mood. He's very tired and crabby and and I, I caught it. Um, and that was my, my choice, um, but then I was aware of it, cause I, I was aware of it because nothing hugely bad happens.

Speaker 1: 17:48

So when you have these kind of smaller events that happen, it's easier to catch it and go okay, hold on, I don't need to keep this bad mood. What can I do to kind of get myself back to neutral or better? And I would think a thought and I would be like okay, what's okay right now, what's not miserable, what's going good. I would think a positive thought and then like, be like okay, what's what's okay right now, what's what's not miserable, what's going good? I would think a positive thought and then like, instantly I hear a voice that's like, yeah, but but this you know well, at least it's spring, yeah, but it's going to rain tomorrow, you know, like that kind of a thing.

Speaker 1: 18:18

And that's so easy. I mean, that's our. Our minds, I know, are wired that way. But what do you do about that? And that's just a small example. When we have bigger goals, a lot of times we sabotage ourselves with even bigger thoughts. So what's your workaround for that?

Speaker 2: 18:29

Yeah Well, actually, mindy, you actually said the answer. It's awareness, it's becoming aware of it first. But again, you know, a couple months ago, I'm irritated with my wife and I'm the personal development guy, you know which. She throws in my face a lot. You don't sound too personally developed, you know. But anyhow, getting back to your question, you have that awareness and once you have the awareness, you have then a choice. And with my wife a couple months ago, I chose. I said screw it, I'm still angry, I'm going to be that way, even though I knew what the what the right choice was to be. You know what I mean. So when you, when you want to subvert that and and have a healthier outcome, you have to associate it with you. Know what you, what do you want out of this? You know what I mean and it has to be for the greater good. You know what I mean.

Speaker 2: 19:27

Marriage, specifically, is selfless. You know what I mean. You have to be selfless in a marriage and raising children, same thing. And sometimes you have to understand that with that choice that you have, you have to decide. Otherwise it's not an emotion. I talked about emotion. Now I'm talking about you have to make a decision.

Speaker 2: 19:56

And my mother always said to me early on in my marriage she's like, remember, marriage is no longer a feeling, it's a choice. I said, what are you talking about? She's like remember, marriage is no longer a feeling, it's a choice. I said, what are you talking about? She's like love, paul, you're gonna not gonna love your spouse all the time. You know you're not gonna feel it, but you have to decide to love them. So that decision comes easy some days and it doesn't come easy other days. But we have have to be what you said, mindy aware of what we truly want.

Speaker 2: 20:26

Yeah, and humility. You know what I mean. We have to be humble. And who wants to be humble? I said it was the way to go. You know it used to be. It's crazy. My wife and I. She would parent a different way because she never was. You know, capital punishment was unheard of in her upbringing. So when my four-year-old did something wrong and I grabbed him, she'd get mad at me. So not only I'm angry, because my wife's angry at me for getting upset with my son. It was like a vicious circle. You know what I mean. And it's a decision process and the more you practice it the right way, the easier it becomes. So with your, probably you have an adolescent son.

Speaker 1: 21:08

I do.

Speaker 2: 21:09

Yeah, that's. You know what I mean. That's danger right there. You know what I mean. It's, it's crazy before school, even after school sometimes, the miserable uh and and it's and it's hard sometimes. But I don't allow it. I use my sarcasm to get the best of them, you know what I mean, and that kind of brings a chuckle here or there. Oh, dad, you're so stupid. You know what. You know what.

Speaker 2: 21:31

That that's my way of trying to the lightheartedness of it all you know yeah that's you know, and not all these are perfect, but the point is we're getting there. It's like the stock market it goes up and down, but eventually it's going way up. You know what I mean From year to year to year.

Speaker 1: 21:45

Yeah. So we talked about how money, relationships and health are kind of like the big three big areas of life that everybody. If you don't have a goal or a wish or a dream in one of those areas, you probably have it in all three. I don't know, but I'm curious to hone in on a couple of these specific ones because they're so common for us. So let's talk about money first. And now I know I've seen in some of your writings and your work and whatnot that says that you can change your annual income to your monthly income and I think that for a lot of people listening, some people might go, okay, yeah, let's figure it out, and other people will hear that and say, yeah, right, like there's no way, there's no way. I don't believe you, paul, so tell me about that.

Speaker 2: 22:34

I scoffed at that when my mentor mentioned that to me. So are you crazy? You know what I mean. It's one thing if you want to 10 times your income. But if you want to 10 times your income, but if you're making, say, you're making $100,000 a year, you know what I mean. And you want to double your income, okay, you know, go to 200,000. But to make a you know, a million dollars, $1.2 million a month a year, you know, 100,000 times 12, right, 1.2,. That's crazy. But then when you break it down, mindy, what's crazy about it? It's all relative.

Speaker 2: 23:06

If you think about it, if you're caught in the environment that you're in right now and think you literally turning your annual income into your monthly income, can come through multiple sources of income, msi, and once you have the right attitude and you have the right disposition, you can do anything. You know I could be talking to Warren Buffett, the big financer and the big. You know he probably would scoff at me. You only want 1.2 million. I make that in an hour. You know what I mean. So the point is, if I have an apartment building that I rent out or whatever, that's a passive income. I go online, I develop something, I have a course or something online that I've developed, or I've now gotten so excited in my industry whether you're an auto mechanic or a sales guy that you've developed something that now you've grown to a certain other level. So that can come.

Speaker 2: 24:19

And it all starts with the mindset. And you have to believe. If you don't believe you can do it, there's no way you're going to do it. It's like your self-image how are you going to outperform it? You can't. But if you get that self-image and you increase it and you raise it, you can do anything you want to do. And again, I'm living proof of that. I almost lost power here. I'm sorry I had to plug in, but the point is you truly have to ingrain that in your mind.

Speaker 2: 24:56

Exactly what you want, it's not just making $2 million to make $2 million. Why do you want to make that money? Why do you want to change your annual into your monthly? First, First and foremost, foremost, you have to figure that out. Well, I want to be financially free and you have to get detailed. You really have to get to the nit and gritty of what exactly it is you want. And again, this is something that I talk to people more on an intimate basis, on a one-on-one basis, because in a forum like this it's it's tough to get into the specifics because we don't know every individual is different you know whether you're a doctor or your salesperson or whatever, whatever it is and what your, your passions are yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 25:36

I think the the biggest thing that I took away from that is again this idea that you have to believe you can do it. And I mean, you see, you know, you see that on like posters and t-shirts and you know memes and whatever. Believe in yourself. And it's like, yeah, believe in yourself, you can do it. But but that's way easier said than done, I think, when it comes down to it, the actual belief in yourself. And you're right that if you don't 100% believe that that's a possibility for you, then it's not going to happen.

Speaker 2: 26:08

Right, unless unless you believe in me or you believe in your mentor, that's, that's instructing you. Because he said to me listen, paul, you don't have to believe it, but you just have to believe that I believe and I did. I believed wholeheartedly in my mentor. You know I I put my stock in him, so I just did everything that they said. You know, uh, and I've had, you know, a number of mentors over the year, and with YouTube, you can have a mentor anywhere. You know, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, my mentor, jim Rohn, who he was dead for seven years before I even knew who he was. The point is, you study that enough and you start to ingrain that stuff, you really start to believe it and it happens. You don't become phenomenal overnight. It takes what? 20 years to become an overnight success.

Speaker 1: 26:57

Or thereabouts Something like that, yeah right.

Speaker 2: 27:03

So it's those things. It's hard because we can all get wrapped Something like that yeah right, so it's those things. You know it's hard because we can all get wrapped up in the negative. You know it's almost like we have a free pass. If someone close to you dies and you're bummed out, people you know console you for that and they understand that, as they should. But to stay in that state is not going to help you, and that's where I help a lot of people is with untimely death, whether it's a child, whether it's a spouse, whether it's a parent, whatever have you. But it's plausible. To get to that you just have to believe in yourself, like you alluded to as well.

Speaker 1: 27:58

Yeah, yeah, so all right. So that takes care of money. So let's talk about some relationships, a little relationships.

Speaker 2: 28:05

This was only that easy, right? Yeah, money's all set now. Everybody's a millionaire out there, everybody.

Speaker 1: 28:09

Everybody that's listened to this podcast. We're like all right, six weeks we doubled our income. Piece of cake. All right, let's fix something else. So you talked about marriages specifically, but I'm curious, like work relationships, because sometimes those can be trickier, because you did not choose consciously to pick that person that's sitting at the desk next to yours and maybe you like them and maybe you don't, so what?

Speaker 2: 28:37

do you?

Speaker 1: 28:37

what's your?

Speaker 2: 28:38

suggestion. You know I mentioned about our paradigms. You know, in our minds there's paradigms in companies, in countries Just look at the wars going on right now. There's paradigms, fast the culture, the culture. And when you have a culture that's toxic in a company per se, it's very difficult for one person to come in and change that. But you don't have to change anything. The only thing you have to change is yourself and just be who you are.

Speaker 2: 29:14

And I always use that example I don't know if you've heard it before the potato, the egg and the coffee bean. And you've got a boiling pot of water and you take the hard potato and you throw it in the boiling and it becomes soft. That's what the company does to you. It softens you up. And the egg that's soft in the inside. You put it in the pot and it comes out hard. That's what the company does to you. It hardens you.

Speaker 2: 29:36

But the coffee bean you put it in the water. What does it do? It changes the water. You know what I mean. It doesn't change the coffee bean. The water changes the environment, the culture changes Because the coffee bean did that. So be the coffee bean is what I say to people. And just don't worry about Jimmy, who's an absolute jerk and negative. Just worry about you, you know for being upbeat and positive, and try to find something in Jimmy that's positive and if you can't, then focus on Jane or whomever else you know, and that's that. That's always helped me from day one, but it's. It's very difficult when you do have a toxic relationship.

Speaker 2: 30:18

You know, whether it's one on one or a company or things. But you can only change yourself, and when you change you start feeling better and that irritating employee doesn't bother you as much when you stop feeling good.

Speaker 1: 30:31

Yeah, you know yeah.

Speaker 2: 30:32

When you're ticked off, everything ticks you off. Yep, you know, you know, yeah, so tell your son if it's just son that he's going to be moving out unless he shapens up. You know what I mean.

Speaker 1: 30:45

Tell to be moving out unless he's shaping up you know I mean tell him to be the coffee bean. Be the coffee bean, I'll let him know.

Speaker 2: 30:48

I'm sure he'll be like all right, oh yeah, sure, yeah, just like our money talk yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 30:53

So I have one final question for you, and this is a question I ask all of my podcast guests anymore. I started off as a monthly and it's been like I don't know six months of me asking this question, because I love to hear the different answers people have. And the question is what's one thing you wish everyone would do in regards to their own well-being? Just one thing.

Speaker 2: 31:15

Oh, my goodness, yeah, that Holy cow. That's a hard question, it is. Narrow it down to one. I'll spit out five or six answers.

Speaker 2: 31:25

If I had to say one thing and I'm going to look at it from my standpoint what's one thing about myself? If I could control my attitude? When I have a good attitude, things go so much better, even when they don't go well. I have the good attitude. When I have a good attitude, you know, things go so much better, even when they don't go well, I have the good attitude. You know that I'm just going to, I'm going to look away and figure out the best thing that I can that I can do in it.

Speaker 2: 31:49

You know it's my mother. I see her at church every morning. You know I'm a good Catholic boy and she's like, oh, and we talk about things. I said, oh, you have such a good attitude, paulie. I said, mom, if you're only with me, you know the 23 hours of the day left. You know you'd see a different attitude, but that's that's what I would is to have an upbeat attitude consistently around the clock. You know, cause there's times when I don't you know what I mean and my wife points it out. She, she lets me know. You know, but that that's what I would say. Cause attitude. Can you know an attitude with an employee? If you have a great attitude, your skills and things can be, you can train an important. But if you've got a guy that's just a woman, that's terrible attitude, it's. It's going to be an uphill battle.

Speaker 2: 32:37

You know, you know you can. You can coach. And again, imagine if you had both a good attitude and good skills. How wonderful you'd be.

Speaker 1: 32:46

It's not either, or.

Speaker 2: 32:47

You can have your cake and eat it too in this world of mine. It's not make-believe. The Pauly G world is not make-believe it's real.

Speaker 1: 32:59

Yeah, yeah, I love, I love that answer of attitude and I'll just tack on to it that you know, for people that are listening, don't think that you have to just have some pollyanna attitude where everything's you know when you've experienced something negative where you go. Oh, I'm not supposed to feel negative, I'm just going to be happy yeah whenever you experience something negative, it's it's just feedback, just information, it's just telling you something. So it's the point is that you have the awareness to go oh, hold on, something's not right, okay Now.

Speaker 2: 33:25

I have the power to make the shift.

Speaker 1: 33:27

Yeah, what's going on? Do I need to change something and now choose to make that shift towards the positive, not just sweeping stuff under the rug because Paul said I'm supposed to be happy like no?

Speaker 2: 33:39

I mean, yeah, you want to be in the sand? Yeah, yeah, don't do that. Yeah, that's that. In, in and again. Um, people think that my the science, not my scientific philosophy. It's been going on for centuries. Um, you know, I'm just adopting it from from whoever else. But the point of the matter is is is just use it, you know, buy into that philosophy and you'll see. You know, it'll be phenomenal. Yeah, you know, but it takes time. Just little things, just change little things, not everything, not a major makeover, you know, maybe just the left eyebrow or the right eyebrow.

Speaker 1: 34:15

Yeah, start small, but it's that consistency, those little tiny habits that you build throughout your day. That's kind of what. That's what builds your life. That's what's really going to make the change is not one big event where you just sat and meditated for one entire day and then that changed your life Probably not. You'll get more benefit if you do it, for you know five minutes every day, or whatever the habit is yeah, repetition is another, is another thing.

Speaker 2: 34:44

Yes, Mindy you are very, very insightful. Well, same to you, Paul.

Speaker 1: 34:51

This, this is this was wonderful, this really was yeah. So, um, speaking of wonderful, if people are listening to this and thinking, wow, I like this. Paul guy, how, where can they find you? How can they learn more about you or work with you?

Speaker 2: 34:57

I like this, paul guy? Where can they find you? How can they learn more about you or work with you? Yeah, on a forum like this, I can share my information with you and you can post it or whatever.

Speaker 2: 35:04

But my text line is generally the easiest because sometimes people, after a program like this, or after I speak or whatever, I'll share my text line and they'll sometimes shoot out a text you know well how do I do this or that and I can share some PDF documents with them and things that can kind of help them along. It doesn't have to be like a, you know, a one-on-one session. You know it can be learning from other people or I send them a video from like Bob Proctor or Jim Rohn or Tony Robbins. So my text line it's 401-741-0162 and I and I can uh share that with you and you can post it on on the feed. But that's, that's the best way, and I have a website and everything, an email address that I can share with you as well yeah, absolutely yeah.

Speaker 1: 35:49

we'll put those in the show notes down below so people can just find you with the easy click of a button. Wonderful, fantastic. Thank you so much for being on today, paul, and sharing all this wonderful information. I had a feeling that when I had this attitude of mine turned south this morning, it wasn't terribly south. It was like oh, this mindset guy, he's either going to help or I don't know what, and I feel better, just for talking about it.

Speaker 2: 36:16

The jury's still out, right, the jury's still out, or I don't know what, and I feel better just for talking about it. Well, the jury's still out. Right, the jury's still out.

Speaker 1: 36:18

We'll see how the day goes, but I'm feeling more on the upswing now, so thank you for that.

Speaker 2: 36:23

Fantastic. Well, Mindy, thank you for having me. It really was a pleasure. It was a nice dialogue that we had.

Speaker 1: 36:30

And everybody that's listening. I hope that you gained a little something from this show. As always, feel free to reach out and let me know what. If you had a little nugget of wisdom that you pulled from this, or if you are listening to this months later, years later, and you tried some of these strategies and they've made a change in your life, go ahead and reach out to either myself or Paul. We'd love to hear all about it. And wherever you're at, I hope you're having a fantastic day and I will catch you on the next one. That's it for today. Friends, if you enjoyed this episode, don't forget to subscribe or, even better, leave a review and let me know what resonated with you the most. The more you tell me what you love, the better I'm able to create future episodes with even better content. I'm sending you so much love and light. I'll see you in the next episode.