War, Addiction, Near-Death—Now a Doctor Changing Minds

In this episode of "Crackin' Backs," we are honored to host Dr. Vincent Ruiz, Ed.D., LPC, a distinguished therapist and founder of H-Hour LLC. Dr. Ruiz's journey from a 12-year military career in the U.S. Army to overcoming personal battles with addiction, and ultimately becoming a leading mental health professional, offers profound insights into resilience and transformation.

About Dr. Vincent Ruiz:

Dr. Ruiz served in the U.S. Army for over a decade, an experience that profoundly shaped his perspectives on life and resilience. Following his military service, he faced significant challenges during his transition to civilian life, including struggles with addiction that deeply impacted his sense of identity. A near-death experience became a pivotal moment, leading him to seek help and undergo an internal transformation. Inspired by his journey to recovery, Dr. Ruiz pursued a career in therapy, earning his doctorate and dedicating himself to assisting others facing similar challenges. He is the founder of H-Hour LLC, where he leads a team in challenging beliefs and fostering personal growth.

What You Will Learn:

• Defining Moments in Military Service: Dr. Ruiz shares experiences from his military career that significantly shaped his views on resilience and life.
• The Decision to Seek Help: Insights into the transformative moment when Dr. Ruiz chose to seek assistance and the internal changes that followed.
• Journey to Becoming a Therapist: What inspired Dr. Ruiz to pursue therapy as a profession and how his personal experiences influence his approach to helping others.
• Insights from 'H-Hour': Recurring themes and valuable lessons from his platform, 'H-Hour,' focusing on mental health discussions.
• Addressing Stigma Around Addiction: Strategies Dr. Ruiz employs to change societal perceptions and advice for those hesitant to seek help due to stigma.
• Incorporating Military Discipline into Therapy: How military discipline informs his therapeutic practices and ways individuals can apply similar principles to enhance mental well-being.
• Maintaining Mental Health: Dr. Ruiz's personal routines and philosophies that support his ongoing mental health journey and how they have evolved over time.

For more information about Dr. Ruiz and his work, visit H-Hour LLC's official website.

Join us for an enlightening conversation that delves into the complexities of overcoming personal challenges, and the continuous journey of maintaining mental health.

We are two sports chiropractors, seeking knowledge from some of the best resources in the world of health. From our perspective, health is more than just “Crackin Backs” but a deep dive into physical, mental, and nutritional well-being philosophies.

Join us as we talk to some of the greatest minds and discover some of the most incredible gems you can use to maintain a higher level of health. Crackin Backs Podcast

Transcript

Dr. Spencer Baron: 0:00

In this episode, we sit down with Dr Vincent Ruiz, a former US Army veteran whose 12 year service led him through intense combat and personal battles after facing heroin addiction and a near death experience, Dr Ruiz transformed his life becoming a leading therapist dedicated to challenging perceptions and fostering resilience. Join us as he shares his journey from the front lines to healing minds, offering insights and tips that will inspire and provoke thought that will allow you to make changes immediately. Tune in.

Dr. Terry Weyman: 0:39

All right. Well, we're super happy to have Vince Ruiz on our show, and I gotta give just a shout out right off the bat to the guy that put us together. That's Monte heat, who's one of my favorite human beings on the planet, who's got a heart as big as his body. So anytime he's he recommends somebody I jump on it and first off, Dr Ruiz, thank you for your service. You gave us 12 years with the US Army. So I know, I know that really shaped your life, and I like to have a defined moment from your years in service before we get into what you do in present day. Let's talk a little bit about the journey your life has been on and sniffly shaped your perspectives on life and and your resilience. Can you give us a little background on who is? Dr Ruiz,

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:27

yeah. I'll give you the Netflix preview version, student athlete as a young person, right? And I think a critical time. I always recall seventh grade. I got cut from the A team or the star team and put them in the B team or whatever. And two things happened, and that was ice hockey. Specifically. One is my grandfather was like, if you quit now, you may never stop. Number one, Now, mind you, he stormed the beaches in Normandy and fought through Europe, built a business after right? His frame of reference. So that was a critical moment where I just learned that, like, all right, I don't want to be known as a quitter, just don't want to be known as a quitter, right? So I make the A team the 18 the next year we go to Nationals, and that just begins the story of hockey. And I'm all in through high school. I end up playing collegiately. I was recruited by Derek lowland. He was recently let go by the Red Wings. He sat in our living room and first professional challenge from the outside my little incubated area of like, Hey, I think you're this big, but you might be this big, we just don't know yet. So played a little collegiate ice hockey, and was moving along, and then 911 happened. And I'm from New Jersey. I have family from New York. I was born in New York, and it was immediate impact, a call to action. And I would argue, if 911 doesn't happen, I may or may not serve in the military. I don't know for sure, and the goal and intent was like, how quickly can I get involved in some capacity, way, shape or form? And my uncle, who served in Vietnam in the 1/73 and my grandfather both said, you, if you're going to enlist, you want to enlist in Ranger Regiment, and you want to try to get to Delta Force as fast as you possibly can. Now these are the sage, the wise old men in my story, and I declined all of that and didn't listen to any of their wisdom. And I went into civil affairs because it fell under the Special Operations umbrella. It was a much softer side of it, and I don't regret it, because it led to some of the things you asked about, experience, testing, persistence, resilience, development. And I don't know if I would have gotten the opportunities I did if I didn't choose that route. And that's all happenstance, right? So so I listed, and when I was finishing training, the invasion Iraq happened, and I was at Fort Bragg. And Fort Bragg is the kind of place that's upset when there's no war going on, if that makes any sense, right? And when I got there, I figured out really quickly, as a young kid, I was like, Oh, these men, and there's like, onesie twosie women. These men are really, really serious about this, and they've been doing it a very, very long time. So those are some of the my first professional tests of like, am I going to be respected? Can I be accepted? Can I perform at this level and task? And then a series of deployments just accumulated over time where I started to form and shape my worldview, about myself, about the world, about others involved in the world. And the test of resilience came on many different fronts, whether it was on the battlefield or back home during that decade or so. I mean, you know, I have a divorce to show. I've struggled with trauma and addiction, I've moved around a little bit. I've been estranged from family, and I was complicit in every little bit of it. And I think the resilience was really tested, not in the toughest and tenacity of the ball battlefield was actually towards the end of my time in service, when I was struggling the most with my mental health. So that's how we got here.

Dr. Terry Weyman: 4:27

So you just kind of touched upon it, but doing a little bit of the background, talking to your friends, I kind of want to go back. You mentioned the word addiction, and I know that became a huge because there's 1000s of people suffering from addictions of all kinds. You know, not only substance, but mental everything. Addiction is just a broad based word, but to really identify with the listener right now, who may be struggling some. Can you just, do you mind going to that little part of your life, a little bit? Can kind of explore that a little bit.

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 5:01

Yeah, absolutely. It's, um, it's a super dark period of time. So my last appointment was to Afghanistan. And I spent a year in Kunar Province, up in the Pakistani border in 2010 and it was a very contested part of the battlefield. I probably had PTS long before that, but it was the first time the symptoms came up to the surface. And you know, my boss essentially pulled my side is like, hey, like you're showing types of behavior that aren't consistent with what you need you to be doing. So that was the first red flag, but I paid it no heed, and in my ignorance or arrogance, didn't do anything about it. So flash forward, we come back to the States, and the time goes on. I'm drinking much more heavily than I've ever drank before, like Tuesday afternoon, Wednesday afternoon. Now it's Thursday morning, Thursday for lunch. Now it's Friday morning. Friday middle of the break. Friday at lunch. And then in that winter, leading towards the middle, like November, December, 2011 I found the right person, wrong person I was looking for, and she was using heroin at that time, and I found exactly what I was looking for, because a shot of heroin I was an IV drug user is like a warm hug, and I look back on it now as an academic and a practitioner of counseling, I would tell somebody that when they come in my office, and I tell them often, if somebody's struggling with drugs and alcohol, I would say, Hey, I'm super grateful that that's what you're struggling with right now, because we can talk about that, because I also struggled with suicidal and homicidal ideation. Homicidal ideation during that period of time, right? And so if I take my own life in that period, right, and I make this emotional decision, and whether it's caused by psychosis, due to the drugs or just behaviors I'm not managing, that could happen, and I could have very well easily hurt somebody significantly, because the minute you're involved in heroin and cocaine in the streets in North Philly, Camden, New Jersey, wherever you're in an environment that's very, very similar to the battlefield, nothing is what it seems, and trust doesn't exist. Whereas in the battlefield, you depend heavily on the people next to you to trust them with your life in the street that doesn't exist. It is. It is a zero sum game. And so I ran the streets for a year and a half, and a half, and it escalated to degrees of criminality. I'm not proud of any of that, and I don't need to share the specifics, but that's what comes with that world. I blew through the 150 grand that was my life savings at 32 years old, which was all the money in the world. To me, my wife left and divorced me. I was estranged from my daughter. All rightfully so. They did the right thing. And so I think the critical moment of time is when I overdosed in November 12, 2012, my girlfriend, at that time, junkie girlfriend, we were co dependent and using, she actually rushed me to the hospital, and they saved my life with a couple shots of Narcan and a little bit of electricity to kind of bring us back. And then I walked out of there and I didn't know what I was going to do. I called my father. I hadn't talked to him in probably three or four months, and I call him from the hospital, and I'm like, Hey, you were right. Because in August that summer, he called me to come meet him at a park, very neutral site. I hadn't talked to him in years. He's like, Hey, you're my son, and I love you, and I'm very afraid I'm going to lose you, the things that you're doing and you're engaged in right now, there's one of two outcomes. You're going to die in the street or you're going to go to prison for a really long time, right? And I was okay with all of that. Sure enough, three months later, that happens, and I call him immediately, and I'm like, Hey, Dad, you were right. What happened? Blah, blah, blah, one thing led to the next, and then by the following day, I was on my way to treatment, and I would go to spend 93 days in an inpatient hospital. And that would be very much a tipping point, much like grandpa in seventh grade saying, Hey, don't start quitting now about something that I want, right? Well, there and then it's the other side of it. I needed to learn how to surrender in a very real way, and that's counter to a warrior's ethos. So yeah, that's how we got there.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 8:33

Unbelievable. You know, facing, facing a near death, experiencing like that is profoundly transformative. Needless to say, um, please, if you don't mind, and thank you for being so candid, because that's what's riveting, and that's what gets people's attention. Other than, hey, I can help you, you know, but if you've lived it, you can truly, you know, mesh with someone's you know situation. But if you don't mind describing that moment where you decided to get help, you know, what was that internal shift that that you know, really,

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 9:11

I've shared this before, and I would, I would tell anyone is, it's the modern day miracle. I knew I was done really. So in narcotics, anonymous, Alcoholics Anonymous, in many of these programs they're referred to is like, the miracle happens. The miracle happens, the miracle it literally was like relieved for me at that point. Now here's the challenge, right? I didn't have the knowledge and skills in terms of how to stay clean, right? Getting clean is easy, right? They can put you in jail for long enough, right? Or they can isolate you in a rehab, right? Or wherever you need to go get the addictive behaviors, in terms of my psyche, were the challenge and problem. So in that 90 days to your to your question, is, what I learned, is this a really basic, basic skill that I think is really important for anybody that's wanting changing anything it's close ended. Does this help me or hurt me? So at that moment in time, somebody was like, Hey, Vince, does heroin help you? Hurt you at this point, and I had to come up with a list. Hey, it helps me, right? I don't have to pay attention. It doesn't make me feel whatever, right? It does help me in some ways. How does it hurt you? And then you run down the list of how it hurts, right? I'm exposing myself to all sorts of illnesses, disease, I don't know what I'm shooting, whatever. Right? My family finances, I'm a burden on the community and society beyond my own family, right? And the last part of it is, hey, what does this say about me? And you got to fill that in. And in that space, in that 93 days, that's what I did, is like, hey, this says this, this and this. And then, uh, having good people around me at that point in my life, they were like, Hey, that's a great point. That's super, super self aware. And this, this person naturally led into emotional intelligence. You know, hey, you have awareness now. So the next thing is regulation. What are you going to do about it? So, well, I'll go to some meetings. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't believe so I start going to meetings when I get to the hospital. And then I hit, you know, 45 days where I made a meeting, 45 days straight, and it was a recommendation. It was very hard to do. And I feel like I'm not getting anything. I'm not changing. And I turn to the guy that's encouraging me, and I'm like, Hey, I've done this 45 days straight. It's like, five days straight. Nothing's changing. My life is still the same. I owe ton of money to the government, right? I have no money of my own. My kid doesn't talk to me, my ex wife won't pick up the phone. And my dad's starting to meet me for coffee once in a while, just to kind of see and measure like, how's he looking? I'm gainfully employed at this point. I'm starting to work again and kind of figure out what that looks like. And the biggest thing in that moment is he said, Hey, It's been 45 days. When's the last time you did anything for 45 days? I was like, Ah, I used to shoot dope all the time, every day. I never missed a day. And so he's like, hey, you've been clean an extra 45 days because you just make these meetings and continue to make these meetings. And it expanded upon the miracle that had happened when I went to rehab. It was like, I know, I'm kind of done, right? It was like, Oh, wait, if I stay this course, right? The seventh wonder or something, something of the world compounding interest. It's our behavior is just the same. So our dollars and behaviors work just like the market. It's just hard to see when we're in it, when it's doing that. The idea is that the S, P is going to end up here. So if I reflect that in my life, and I'm constantly already managing my fund, the fund of Vince, right? Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, intellectually, vocationally, socially. And of course, the final domino financially, I'm going to start to put myself at a competitive advantage, because I start to find people like Spencer, like Terry and like David, and, of course, our mutual friend Monty, right? I start to find people that are looking to rise the boats and the tides and all that stuff. So that's the short version of how it all started and and then I just went wild, because there was a lot of people that knew me as this, and they would have been happy for me to stay like that. And I just made a concerted effort and decision to just, uh, blind fury. I'm either naive, ignorant or courageous. Depend on how you tell the story. I think Manny would say naive and ignorant. Um, ignorant, but I feel a little courageous at times, because I had to go back to college at 33 right? I'm leading men in combat, in battle, and now I'm in a college class, and the gift, this is how the gift happens. My first professor for information literacy was Dr Len Burnham. He was a Vietnam veteran in the Marine Corps in combat, and then he came back and played for the Philadelphia Eagles, and then then he was their sports psychologist for a period of time, and the Philadelphia sports teams, he pulled me aside and said, hey, you know you're coming back to school. Adult student things that he's like, military. That's great, wonderful. Because I feel like I'm like, clean and sober. I figured it out. And he's like, none of these students care what you did over there or what you've done the last 12 years. He's like, nor do I either. Actually, he's like, I'm proud of your service. I'm grateful for it. He's like, Whatever you do the rest of your life is going to be much more telling because you're going to live longer older than you are young. And so meeting these people, and they share the sage wisdom, it's like, then I started hanging on the words when I when I hear those things, I'm like, Oh, I gotta hang on that. Like, Oh shoot. What if I do make it past 40? Oh, shoot. What if I do make it past 60? The way things are going, it's not gonna be uncommon for people to pass the century mark, right? And so I share that is that I didn't have those perspectives when I was in the heat of battle out in Baghdad or Afghanistan. It was the enemy. It was us versus them, point blank. Period, geopolitical situation doesn't matter. So it's a lot of it was emotional maturity and growth. So I could work through those steps and change the version of Vince. Vince.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 14:07

You often hear about people changing after they have to hit rock bottom. Is that true?

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 14:15

I don't know if that's true or not, because I've heard so many stories, right? I would say this is that the bottom doesn't really exist. There's actually trap doors. And you can go further. I mentioned the s, p, right? But here's what I found out. Our systems, whether it's MasterCard or the IRS or whoever, they will allow you to go past zero, and they will allow you to keep going past zero. And then what happens is, I'm doing well. I'm two years in this up get clean, but I haven't seen an accountant in years, right? And I'm walking home, but some guy jumps out of the bushes asking if I'm me from the government, right? So I share and disclose all these things to you, not that I was doing anything illegal, illicit. I knew. I didn't even know what I was doing, but I cleared out IRAs, I cleared out things like that, and they want everybody for that stuff, right? So I'm getting a short version of. How did some of these unfolded? Because I also had legal issues, right? I also had been arrested with intent to distribute a whole bunch of heroin on me. The only thing that saved me was the judge was a veteran, and the prosecutor is trying to make an example of me. The only thing that saved me was where I was arrested, in Essex County, New Jersey, Newark Airport, that Newark area filing crime would have kept me in there, right? It was more like, Hey, you're here for a day. We trust that you're going to come back. And so then I didn't go back. And so then, clearly, there's a warrant for me. So I'm in the sobriety process, and all this stuff is the lingering effects of just poor choices and behaviors. But I'm doing well at this point. And so I call a friend of mine. I'll disclose who he is. I'm like, Hey, can you look up my stuff in your system? Law enforcement officer, he plugs it in, and he's like, and this is a really good friend of mine. He goes, What did you do? Dummy? He's like, he's like, he's like, you go to Florida. They're bringing you back to New Jersey, dude, you go to California. They're bringing you back. As a matter of fact, the only way you're getting at is, I think, is if you leave the country, dude. And so here's the thing in my head. I'm like, Ah, maybe I'll go to the Foreign Legion. Maybe I'll go to South America. Maybe I'll America. We all do that, right? And the reality I wasn't doing anything. I needed to face that down. So, so that was part of it, dealing with the legal ramifications. And I think what, what keeps people stuck in addiction, specifically, and it's not limited to drugs. It can be sex, it can be shopping and nowadays, gambling, forget about it. They are attacking 18 to 25 year olds. They meaning the monster that passes the legislation, policy and runs the companies, and they're doing it really well. That's a tangent, but at the end of the day, it's coming down to ask that question, hey, does this help me or hurt me? And what does it say about me? Humans are smart. They got to fill it in. They got to fill it in. So good. And if somebody comes in, they're using drugs and alcohol. It's not like, hey, let's stop immediately. Let's figure out what's the reasons to stop. And do you even want to stop? Because nobody spits out a good shot of scotch. Nobody spits out a 12 year old scotch. Nobody spits out a good shot of Colombian heroin. Nobody a good tut of Columbia. Like it just doesn't happen, right? Nobody. Nobody makes a wager when they go to Vegas, even though they know they shouldn't be doing it the mortgage or not, because they're looking to get that hit of whatever. They're trying to get hit distract and avoid, and they've been habituated to it. And so we're in a world, in my estimation. And this is, again, the academic me, and this is the person who runs a business dealing with behavioral health. We are in a traumatized society currently that is addicted to stress, right? And meaning this is right. If I'm getting that hit of stress, and I could keep my cortisol level hovering wherever I need it to be, it's all accessible for all of us at all times, and we're complicit in it. I include myself. I'm very much complicit in that self, too. Yeah, there's

Dr. Spencer Baron: 17:27

an interesting book on dopamine nation, which says it all. You know, we're looking for hits on dopamine. We're on our phone, scrolling and, you know, one after the other. But yeah, you're absolutely right. And, you know, in professional sports, they often talk about, especially in the NFL, they would have exit strategies for the guys that were leaving the sport. And talk about, you know, the the abuses, that which is the addictive behaviors, you know, gambling, sex, drugs, alcohol and, oh and and spousal abuse. You know that aggressive, aggressiveness and they, you know, really now work on a lot of that, because it's been such a problem, not just obviously, in the military, but also in professional sports, life after professional sports, especially with the concussion stuff that goes on,

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 18:24

yeah, CTE, traumatic rein injury. Any of that stuff is very relevant. I saw an interesting study a couple years ago, soccer players experienced the most CTE. I wasn't aware of that, and I was thinking about, I'm like, oh, yeah, they're always the ball anyway. So I mean, that's stuff that's very real, and it starts at a very young age, and it doesn't take much to rattle that thing. I have found

Dr. Terry Weyman: 18:44

boxing too. You're boxing in martial arts. Kicks the head all the time. Look at Muhammad Ali all that, all the shots he took absolutely

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 18:52

so I have a son, and I'm a big sports guy, and actually, I tease my wife all the time. I'm like, I'm like, I don't know if I want to play contact sports, and I love sports, and I'm like, the head and because I know, I just know what can potentially come of that, right? Like, I cannot know that and not that my parents were wrong. I think they were doing what they thought was the best thing. But I think about getting my bell rung and some of the effects of it, and then I tease her, and I'm like, you know, I'm like, I think equestrian, tennis, auto sports and saline, or what I want to play. She's like, you just read that off the Rolex site. I was like, Well, I'm gonna start there, though, right? But, like,

Dr. Terry Weyman: 19:25

money, do that the arm wrestling, the arm wrestling

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 19:29

a shoulder, a shoulder or an elbow is a much better way to go. So I think you bring up something interesting. Me, money, are very passionate about it. Sounds like you guys are based on your work. And what I saw on the site is the physical part of it, right? Is, you know, I think some folks get wrapped around the axle like a physical practice has to be an explicit thing, and you gotta follow steps, and it has to be nice and clean, neat and clean, and you have to do this, and you have to do that. I'm at a point where I think I've met enough people, and this is 10,000 plus hours of providing digital therapy. Is like, go for a walk and eat a healthy meal and have a healthy conversation, and you're. Like, at a competitive advantage, yeah? Like, let's not complicate it, right? Like, if you want to be Arnold, be Arnold. If you want to go to the CrossFit Games, go to if you want to get ready to become a seal, be a seal. Yet, as a good citizen and responsible citizens, like, go for a walkie healthy meal, have a good conversation, I would say most people, regardless of demographics, would be better served just to implement that. That's the quickest hacker fix. I

Dr. Spencer Baron: 20:21

think, do you realize he just, he just, Vince, just mentioned how we were taught in chiropractic health that the tryout of health, mental, nutritional, physical, they really need to be so you said, have a good meal. Go for a walk and have a good conversation with somebody, yeah, and feeding it. That was good. Vince, you did that instinctively, but that is perfect. Hey, you know, let me ask you over, you know, overcoming the the addiction and you know, you know, I'd love to know what inspired you and your career path that you've chosen. Obviously, we all like to help others, but I bet it goes a little bit deeper. Can you share us what you're thinking? I had an

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 21:01

amazing therapist when I was inpatient, Maria Garcia. She wasn't a veteran, or she didn't talk much about her service. I shouldn't say that. I don't know. Michelle might have been yet she was. She played a profound role in that period of time, because the heroin really was what got me there, right? But they're doing all the assessments of my PTS, right? And I was presented a lot of depressive stuff. So did a lot of behavioral therapy, rational mood, behavioral therapy, cognitive process, and therapy to sort through it. And two weeks into the treatment, she pulled me side. She's like, Hey, I have some good news for you. She's like, you absolutely rate opiate use disorder, right? That's that's part of it. She's like, Have you ever talked to anybody about post traumatic stress. And I was like, How dare you blasphemy? Arms hold it immediately. I was like, no, no, please, please tell me. Tell me more about this thing, right? Civilian sitting in this comfortable office, right? She goes into it, she reads some good examples. And I'm like, ooh, that might be me. She's like, I want you to go to this other group next week. So I go into this other group now. It's filled with guys all from from lejune, all the Marines from LA June, all the guys from Fort Bragg, a few people from monies neighborhood in Virginia, whatever, right? We're all in there, and I'm just listening to the stories. Oh, something, something. I feel angry. Start yelling, my wife, whatever. I'm divorced. I don't need Hey. Sometimes I get up, I wake up in the middle night and patrol my backyard to check the perimeter. I'm like, ooh, looking around like, and I see the other guys going, yep. But internally, I'm trying to make the connection become congruent, because I do that, right? But I don't want to acknowledge that that's part of the hyper vigilance, that's part of the behavior in terms of how my trauma has been expressed. Oh, my God, right. So I hear that, I see that, I go, okay, cool. I'm like, This is it? I go back to Maria the next week. I'm like, Hey, about that diagnosis? I think you might be on to something. Tell me more. She's like, Hey, cool. This this, Hey, take a read of this Achilles in Vietnam. Was the book she gave me. It's a series of vignettes where they run parallels between Vietnam and Homer's Iliad and the language that's used in the syntax in terms of how they're the same thing. There's nothing new under the sun in terms of what warriors experience. There's just nothing new under the sun. We just think it's new and unique to us, because the first time we experience it, to be frightened like that, scared like that, oh, I can't believe a human can that can happen, or this can happen, or the road can be disappeared, or building can go those. Those are AB we have, we have very, very normal reactions and responses to abnormal circumstances. Right, right? We have very, very normal responses and reactions to abnormal circumstances, combat and war create that. So that diagnosis comes, and I start to become more accepting, because the camaraderie of the other guys sharing their stories about the behaviors, things resume, and now I don't feel isolated. So on that petri dish, right? I'm no longer that neuron that's like trying to grab and cling to life, right? I'm that neuron that's binding, right? And the synapses are are going from this to that, and now we're cohesive. I know your listeners won't be able to see that, but it's wrapped tight. It's strong, right? As opposed to from a distance. That's what was happening. So, right, literally, in the physical sense of life, I'm starting to make those changes. And at that time, transcranial magnetic stimulation was kind of a thing. It's being researched. And one of the psychs there, he pulled me aside. He was like, hey, all your criteria assessments, you're an ideal candidate. That's because some of the depressive symptoms you want to give it a try. I was like, Well, I was like, You're not gonna, like, cut out my eye and, like, take a look or anything. Are you right? Like, I knew enough about that, right? And he was like, he's like, No, we stopped doing that a while ago. I was like, Okay, what are we talking about? Hallucinogenics? What are we talking about? And he's like, no. He's like, it hooks up. And we're gonna, we're gonna stimulate your parietal lobe, right? And and then, boom, I did 567, treatments of that. And I was like, Oh, wow, I'm not as depressed as I once was when I entered here. So I've been the benefactor of just being open minded and being humble enough to know that I didn't want to go back to the anger, the rage, the version of Vince that was of no use to our community or society, because that's what I was. I was a liability through and through to everyone and everything. And I'm humble enough at this phase to say that, and there's no pressure on any other guy or gal to acknowledge or say. That. But I would argue that if you look in your prisons, yes, there's a lot of mental illness, and there's a lot a lot of bad stuff that people do, some are beyond redemption. In my estimation, that's having worked with that population. However, I would say, like, 80% of the men women there probably just needed a hug at some point in their life. Wow, unbelievable. I'm making the number up, but I would say most of the men, because between zero and three, maybe they got it, maybe they didn't. Maybe they didn't get it right. You know, three to 10 they did or didn't get it right. And 10 to 1812, to 18, they did or didn't get it. But by the time a kid hits like 10 to 12, there's a pretty good there's some predictors. You can kind of tell where they're going to head to, not always, but I think, you know, you have a good idea. And those trauma a traumatic experience in that traumatic background, traumatic societies, traumatic neighborhoods. Not everybody's exposed to that, but at some point, everybody is exposed to pornographic stuff, in some ways perform, and that can easily traumatize somebody if they're not equipped, emotionally prepared, to understand what they're trying to make sense of, you know? And that's why I hate the term. That's universal. The big picture is, you know, we live in a traumatized society, because people see stuff on Fox News, CNN, all the time that can rattle you. Hey, that plane hits a helicopter yesterday evening, tragic accident outside of DC. In my estimation, that's enough for somebody, if they don't have the bandwidth to understand what they're seeing, what actually happened. Those are human beings that are involved in that. Yeah. So give an example. I just find that those are common trends that come up. Let's

Dr. Spencer Baron: 26:17

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Dr. Vince Ruiz: 27:29

That's my pet peeve. Look, the D is for what I put on our billing stuff to make sure that the insurance companies pay everything I like. That's because that's the language that the DSM suggests we need to use. So it's a universal language. I drop it because I think it makes it less intrusive for humans to be open to because I think about my experiences having been a patient and a client, and I think about how my clients receive me, right? I'm a pretty intense human. Let's not jump into talking about disorders. Love that. Let's let's start with like, what are the symptoms of post traumatic stress? Because it's less intrusive, and there's less of a weight Yes, on the shoulders when I hear that, because the minute I hear disorder, I don't even hear post traumatic stress anymore. I just hear disorder, and all of a sudden I start to behave, and it becomes self fulfilling, right? And I think the veteran community does that very well. There's pariahs that prey on that, and that's how they keep their not for profits, going, and they fund them. We got 22 a day. Everybody's homeless, every veteran struggling. All true, and I don't want anyone to struggle yet. I don't know if you know of just continuing to beat that drum solves the problems. I think a lot of times it's, Hey, how do we reframe the language so people

Dr. Spencer Baron: 28:29

can have some hope. You are impressively sharp. And really I I love what you're doing, and this is really just your your glib, you're able to verbose, your I it's something that you create a level of credibility that is fantastic. Very intriguing. So, thanks. I

Dr. Terry Weyman: 28:51

have a question. Vince there. This is a video as well as audio, so people are going to see your stuff as well, as well as your purple jacket. So, so just to let you know, you know you're it's all there for us. So you make all the hand gestures you want. Yeah, great. That's good to know.

Unknown: 29:08

It's good to know. Vince,

Dr. Spencer Baron: 29:11

tell us what H hour is. You've engaged in that new members discussion, yeah,

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 29:16

so, so my business is H hour. So that that came about in I finished undergraduate, some great mentors and relationships. The young man that taught me to do APA was like a 20 year old student that wasn't very confident socially, whereas I'm very more outgoing. So that student became a friend of mine. Early in my academic career, I used to send him, Well, not anymore, but I used to send him my APA papers to take a look at and sort through, right? So that's being open to new relationships, right? Here's the civilian young person. I don't know anything about them, but they have become this friend at this phase. So H hour was born out of a lot of that stuff, meaning this, right? I look at the lens in the world through like we do things in a pragmatic way over long periods of time, whether we know it or not, right? And. And each hour within a military operation is the hour that the operation commences. The most common one, if you were to Google search or chatgpt, it will reference June 6, 1944 06, 30 is when the beaches were supposed to be hit, right? Well, each hour is specific just to any military operation, and that time can be very different depending on average it comes. So for me, it just made sense in my language. So I get to graduate school, and then I'm doing my counseling degree, and I'm meeting all these people that do not see the world like this guy at all. It was the best possible environment I could ever be in, politically, socially, they find it. They just see the world very different than me. There's no veterans in the class at that time, and I'm like getting exposed to a very different side of the world, more maturity, more growth. So the first name was 11th hour, reference to World War One. This okay, like that, but h hour, because the business I'm going to build is generally going to be billing on an hourly scheduler scale, and it's going to be designed like that and woven with people's storyline, because the tagline is the moment when. And so if we reference back to what I shared 06, 30 H hour, right? Well, the moment when for those men at that time. I don't believe there any females that were invasion, but those men, that was their HR, that was their moment when. And similar to what I shared to you about my recovery, man, November 12, overdose, November 13, not sure, November 13, that's the moment when, hey, I got to do something different. I'm gonna go forward, right? So I disclose that with clients when they disclose that with clients, when they come in my office, that H hour is very much that for them, it's to be internalized, adopted, stolen, use it as you need, and then we have fun with it, because h is a fun letter. Hey, that H is redundant. It's just hour, hour. So client, what do you think h should mean for you? Heart, humble, hope, honor, harvest. I'm trying to harvest a new life, and so I'm planting seeds when therapy, so I can start to harvest six months later some of the reward, right? And then we start getting into like, hey, now you plant these seeds, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, into whatever, whatever the skills, whatever you need to support that thing. And then you go back, hey, what crops did you get? Hey, these crops died. Hey, we need to water them a little bit. You need to find new people. So that's all h hour stuff. That's the H hour. That is what it is. People hit those moments when, because the moment when, now I planted the seed, that's a moment when, hey, then I go back to check and tender. Hey, here's my harvest. That's the moment when, Hey, what did I learn from this? I got to do it again. That's the moment when, and I keep sequencing that along and long and along again.

Dr. Terry Weyman: 32:19

Have you ever had anybody honestly say the H stood for? Hell

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 32:23

yeah, I've had people say everything happy hours, the one people default to, typically people that struggle with alcohol, right? But like, I allow folks to have their discretion. And there's probably, like, I would say my wife and I did the exercise when we redid our website. We I looked up my notes, because I keep the notes that clients give. I had like, 53 versions of H that were all valid to their story. Humans are smart.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 32:44

It's but it's generally supposed to be a positive

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 32:48

always, right? Yeah, that's the point. So that, that was how we came up with the name. And then it was, hey, I want to build an individual practice, and I want to, I used to say, cast a wider net, right? Because, in my mind, it was like, that's what it is, and it's simply not. My clinical director said, Hey, we're just here to serve more humans, human hour. Yeah. So be around, be around super smart people, right? They're just gonna make you smarter. And the ironic my clinical director, Brooke, she was my clinical supervisor for three years, so she knew all the inner workings of what I was doing. And when I was doing. And when I asked her, I was like, Hey, I can't afford to pay you what you're worth. I was like, I'm doing this thing when

Dr. Spencer Baron: 33:26

you're ready. I'd love to have you come over and figure it out. That's so good. Hey, could you give us, like, an example that maybe an early first example? You go, wow, this stuff works, you know, or or even something recent that was, I love clinical blow away story. So if you got one, please share. I'll give

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 33:43

you right. So ethically for us, at least in counseling, there's this gray area of like, you asking for Google reviews or having people put your stuff like, it's hard you can't Right? Like, Hey, I was telling Dr Vince about the infidelity of my marriage and loyal to my wife again. Nobody's putting that on Google ever again, right? But however, comma, pause for effect. I was working in community mental health at this point before HR, getting my hours done right, supervised hours, trying to crew as fast as I can, to get out there and do HR right. And I had a client going to Google put a review for me in there, and he basically says, Hey, I met Vince. I was a real fat ass, and I was struggling and miserable and using drugs. I'm not fat anymore, and I'm not struggling. I don't use drugs. Go talk to VIX, wow, which led to a corporate client reaching out that didn't know I was a counselor, saying, hey, is this you I just saw? Is that you? I'm like, Yeah, that's me. And now I do their corporate stuff in their human resources, training, development stuff. So that's that is just being open minded and open hearted to it. However, this is the part I'm getting to is flash forward those text messages from clients of that nature. That is, those are the examples. Hey, Vince, you were right. You know, my business finally did a million dollar winter. All I had to stop doing was line up. This particular part of my life would had nothing to do with me trying to create this thing. It was just because that piece of the distraction taking the attention. Hey Vince, I wanted to stop using drugs and alcohol. I know you couldn't help me with what I needed, but you referred me to the program inpatient I needed. I can't wait to come back to treatment. Hey Vince, I was thinking about killing myself, and then I met you, period. So, so that's the validation I share and disclose those things to my wife, is always like, how are you gonna share that message and tell that story? I was like, I don't know. I think it just breathes and lives among itself. Because when people meet me, I want them to go back to their dining room table or their boardroom or breakfast table, and then it's not even about me. I just want to have that good energy and a little bit of that hope, right? Human hour, hope, hour, harvest hour, whatever they need, right? Like that. That's what it is. And those are the stories, is because I think the HR thing is, it's powerful, it's valuable. And I think conceptually, conceptually, when somebody's trying to overcome the greatest adversity they've known, it's like an invasion into Europe. And whatever that scene in cyberpunk Ryan is might not be with the physical realm Mills, but intellectually and emotionally, that person is exactly like that scene on the beach in cyberpunk. Ryan, intellectually and emotionally without fail, if they've made it into my office at that point, the monkeys are out of the cage, and they're running wild, and we got to get them back in the cage, and we got to learn how to feed them or starve them, because the quickest way to kill something is starve it, easiest way anyway,

Dr. Spencer Baron: 36:20

yeah, yeah,

Dr. Terry Weyman: 36:22

you know they talk about stigma remains a, still a big barrier when addressing addictions, right? And how do you work towards changing perceptions? Because Perception is everything and and what advice do you have for individuals hesitant to actually seek help based off these sociological judgments?

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 36:43

Yeah, well, I'll start with the two words that are kind of feed that, right? And many times have you heard of the term coping skills? Yeah, right. They're valuable. They're wonderful tools, right? And we need them, and we need to teach them and use them. Yet, I think the word change is essentially synonymous in the dictionary. I mean, we could Google it right now. It's essentially one or two words off. I think fundamental life change is much important, more powerful than cope. Hey, client, do you want to learn how to cope? Or do you want to learn to create a fundamental life change? So now we're at a decision, right? And so at that point in time, if you're learning to cope, some of the stigma, labels and bias and judgment are probably gonna they're designed to be that way, like with your friends, your family, how you are, where you are, maybe you have to make amends for a lot of things, and you're preferred to go that way. And there's nothing wrong with that. It's often a start point is you gotta learn new coping skills. It might mean harm reduction, right? So because your family might not be okay with you taking Suboxone or methadone or an Antabuse of some sort, or medication, or pharmaceuticals, or going to therapy because they may not believe so to your point, that's all the stigma, legal biases, comes up, right? When a human is ready, similar to what I shared about myself to create fundamental life change. Well, maybe they have hit that metaphorical rock bottom, or the trap door below it, and maybe in that space is where they go. Yeah, coping but I've been doing I've been shooting dope to cope. Not working right. I have to create a fundamental life change. I would argue, doctor, your question is like, I think that sheds stigma, label and bias, because it speaks to the Divinity individual. You're able to rise above what other people think, because it doesn't matter you're so hyper focused on your dimensions of wellness. At that point, the people that are you're supposed to make amends with, they'll be there, and we'll present the opportunity for you to do so the new people you are inviting into your life for the rest of your life, because you're going to live longer, older than you were young, whether you stopped using at 60 or stop using at 16. Right? That, that, I would say, is how you shed it, and that's the thing. If somebody that's trying to get clean and sober is looking to somebody else to get approval about how they do it, you're looking in the wrong places, because that's inside you, right? Because if I point, I'm like, Oh, Dr, Terry judged me. Dr Spence, how many fingers are going back at Vince, right? And I gotta, I gotta think about that. Am I being a great, great teammate to Vince, first and foremost, before I could be to my wife or my kid? Am I being a great? Yeah? No, yes, no, yes, no. Hey, this one right here, right? Hey, am I being a great Am I Am I practicing quitting the good kind, not the bad kind? Because there's two different types, right? Yeah, am I always trying to win, and am I? Am I estimation, right? Because you're pointing to the stigma. We're pointing to the label, we're pointing to the bias. We just got to tell three better stories to ourselves and be that example for the people that example for the people that

Dr. Spencer Baron: 39:25

are ready to hear that and see that, because it's hard, because, because,

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 39:27

because, if I tell people out here, I'm like, Hey, I used to be a dope fiend, right? My students wouldn't believe it. There's no way. I traded my beret and my ID card for a ski mask, a pistol and a syringe. That's what I did. Literally, same behavior, same mindset. I hadn't changed. I was equally as crazy. And the worst thing about it, and I joke about funny, when I met him, I was like, Dude, I don't even need drugs now called be crazy. And that's when we both belly laughed. And he was like, Yeah, neither are right. So it was like, Hey, do you want to be friends

Unknown: 39:55

at that point? Right? So,

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 39:58

so stigma, labeling, BIAs are very real, and when. Comes to addiction, something I'm passionate about, and I'm very adamant about it, and it's coming across you, the only people that message will resonate with at this point are the folks that are ready for that. I haven't figured out a way to tailor it so that it's more inclusive, that it's maybe better received, right? Because here's the deal, right? We go to the fabric and culture of people's knowledge, their epistemology, and the observations and experiences. That's a lot of stuff to shed, right? If somebody grew up in the church, if somebody this faith, this region, this demographic, you know the patterns of behavior all the same for the addict,

Dr. Spencer Baron: 40:31

but they say when the student is ready, the teacher will come. Or you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink okay? But you do make it attractive, because you have a great way of putting it across. It makes it inviting. It's it's open arms, it's non judgmental. It's comforting to those who are afraid of being judged. Yeah, that's really cool,

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 40:59

because a lot of a lot, a lot of people in their crossroads. Here's the deal. This is the part, and I'm sorry, cut you off. It's important to note, right? They've overcome the stigma, label and bias. They keep making the meetings, or they go into therapy, or they went they're doing the things that they need to do for their particular recovery, and it looks very different for people. But the the common thread is, there's no drugs, no alcohol, no gambling, whatever the thing is that's removed, right? Yet you're still stuck with you. So that process is the fundamental life change part escalated into the future. If people start to go that route, it's hard to see on the beginning and the front end. And I would say my own experience, because when you're in the storm, you can't see past it, you're in it. You're in it. So like my wife, current wife, didn't exist when I was starting in the storm, you know what I mean, and when she scooped me, she got me for like, six cents, and went all in and bought the whole company, and I went back below zero somehow, right? And she made this huge bet. And I share that as clients. I say to them, I was like, you might have to remove people in your life to make room for the right people. And sometimes that's that's generally family and friends. And because if you zoom out and you think about things I talk about in grad school with my counseling students, is this, right? A hot topic is always LGBT issues, right? And whatever they might be, in whatever way, shape and form, and given the current geopolitical climate, comes up quite a bit for all of the reasons. But I always circle back to this Spencer Terry, and you'll appreciate this as providers and caretakers, it's like when that divine individual is in front of you, who cares how they got there and what they believe? Right? Because we get to believe whatever we want to believe. I just need my client to know that they believe what they believe, and they're willing to change, that they're psychologically flexible. And I think that's not limited to addiction, it's any fundamental I change. So what happens is this, is people make that change. All of a sudden, they start thinking differently, dressing differently, dressing differently, talking differently, maybe they're become a reader. Hey, I don't like reading. I listen to audio books or podcasts, right? Or whatever the stuff is that they're doing. They have to become open minded to the possibility that they can be much, much more, much more. You

Dr. Terry Weyman: 42:54

know, what I love about this Spence is you come from a place of authenticity. Yeah. Thank you. You know, I remember listening to a doctor one time trying to give me advice on eating right. Yet he was overweight and smelled like smoke, cigarette smoke, and there was no point of authenticity. So I didn't really listen to him, you know. So you gotta practice what you preach. So I really respect these words coming from you, because they come from a huge place of authenticity. And then you back it up with academic knowledge. So kudos to you. Man.

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 43:25

Appreciate it. Yeah, I steal from all the super smart people, and I think it was either John Lennon or Nelson Mandela, right? We stand on the shoulders of giants, right? Much like yourselves. At some point, somebody came super smart before you that did all the hard work. Because people are like, Oh, it's gonna be so hard to go to grad school be a doc. I'm like, No, it's not. I'm gonna right click the super smart people stuff, and I'm gonna put it on my put it on my page, and I'm gonna paraphrase it like, right? And then I'm gonna start to form my own clinical impressions, right? Because I've done the diligence to start having that conversation. Then I'm gonna become a practitioner of the thing I espouse, right? And, and I think, you know, something, something, something that I struggle with is about academia is folks think school is the only way to do it. I would tell people that, you know, 15 minutes a day, you can become world class in anything. I think that's how I learned how to trade in the market is 15 minutes a day, right? 10 minutes a day. I would read about something, five minutes. I would write about it, and it was painful, right? Like, I definitely made a few trades, calls, puts, something that were not favorable, immediate impact. I learned got to go back. Read more. Okay, hey, Intelligent Investor. Let me read about that. Okay, 10 minutes a day. Write about it. Five minutes. I understand this. I don't understand that. I understand it goes down. 7% do this, it goes down. 14% do that goes on. 25% there's blood in the streets. Start doing this. I didn't grow up in that world. I didn't know those things. Nobody taught those that's not what I study. It's not what I do. So I'm giving it as an example to show. Read 10 minutes a day, about a hyper specific topic. Write about it for five minutes, and within a year, you're within, like the top 10% of people that know about that particular thing. Cool idea, right? Anybody could do that. You don't need college. You don't need permission. Anybody can do that about anything. And so you think about it, if you have 15 minutes in a day. And then again, this is barring. Cognitive impairment or something like that. I had to disclose, right? They that this is intelligence level matters, and some of those, some of those senses, but being able to read, right? Because here's what we know, right is that, I think, man, how many Americans wrote a book last year, onesie, twosie. They read one, maybe two. Something I don't know as I've met people along the way, to include President Bush, the Cabinet Secretaries, folks that are uber successful in different categories, industries, the greater majority are like, voracious readers. Yeah, the answers are all out there. For all of us, I'm mediocre and average at most things I do, with the exception of counseling, I would say counseling is, yeah, like, I feel like Muhammad Ali in the office. I don't, I don't get hit too often.

Dr. Terry Weyman: 45:42

That's, that's why I kind of partnered with Spencer. He's way smarter than me, and I would say, coming around with but what's great about it is, is, you know, standing on the shoulders of giants, he's only five foot five, so was it? It wasn't that hard to do that. So it's nice to be able to stand, stand on a giant. That was, I didn't have to work that hard. So it was a win win for everybody.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 46:08

In other words, he's saying you didn't need a ladder. Now I got my curiosity is aroused in the sense that you were in the military. There's a tremendous amount of discipline. You know, this becomes part of you. How did, how do you incorporate, how did you, how would you, how did you incorporate those, the disciplines you've learned in the military, into, you know, therapy into therapy

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 46:42

practices, the language changes, right? That's the experts job. It's translated so it's understandable by the audience and whoever it is. But I'll give you the one that is, I would say every soldier, at least, has taught this. Marines have their different version. Navy has different they all have a different version. It's like a level one leadership thing in terms of how you manage it. And it's an acronym, it's remises. So receive the mission, initiate movement, make a tentative plan, conduct reconnaissance, issue the order, and supervise. And supervise. Never Ends, right? So, so that that format and temple or model, there's plenty of veterans out there that sell that and teach that like they invented fire, and they're doing it very well and making a lot of money, and I'm proud of them for that, yet, I would tell you that that's basic level leadership stuff. Receive the mission, issue The Warning Order, make a tentative plan conduct, right? You run down that checklist, right? So it's very similar when I translate it over to a client or a teammate, right? And I'll use the language that fits with them, right? If they're faith based, and that's a big part of their story, I'll be like, hey, in your faith, do you guys kind of have like, steps and processes, and, hey, what are they, okay, like, works like that. Okay, what are you into, or your interests, or, I'm a sports guy, okay, in sports, you guys have, like, how do you do whatever? And really, I'll always zoom and circle back to the same point, I'll be like, excellent. You have intimate knowledge about an operations order, whatever it is, simple, simple, simple is going to serve you well, yeah, period, right? Because Richard Feynman taught, right? This is me geeking out. Um, right kind of pressure, fine, right? Princeton, PhD, Adam bomb. He's a little quirky something. He they say the IQ of 120 something. I don't believe any of that. I think he failed the test that day, but, but, but what he did is he always used an example one of his lectures. And I love it. It's so, so powerful. And he says, Hey, I think it's the students he's talking to. It's on YouTube. And he's like, clumsy Aunt Minnie slipped on the ice and had to go to the broke her hip and had to go the emergency room. And then he asked question, why did clumsy Aunt Minnie slip? Right? And generally speaking, most people say, Oh, because she was clumsy. Or Wow, she stepped on the ice. And he would say, like, yeah, those are all the right reasons. What actually happened is that when the rubber from the sole of her shoe hit the frozen surface, the ice a little bit of friction, we have a slippery surface. Boom, she slipped, broken. Boom, right? And his point being is that the word clumsy is not even relevant to the story of what happened. So I think Simplicity is the point of arrival with everything. And I'm copying pasting his stuff because I couldn't begin to understand quantum mechanics. Yet, his example right there, when we're teaching psychology or teaching counseling or chiropractic, right? It's like, hey, I want to take this thing that, if we serve it from a distance, it's like, oh, it's because of this. It's because of that. It's because of that. No, it's the rubber screen of friction you slip. That's it.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 49:36

My My radiology teacher in chiropractic college said something that was so profound to us, because he would put up X rays and MRIs. We couldn't, we couldn't see. We would say, what are you hallucinating? Because we don't see that. And, you know, we would call out these complex disorders, and he would say this magic, magical comment, if you hear. Hoof beats. Do you call it a horse or a zebra? So go, go, basic first, you know. And how many times dr, Terry or Vince? I mean, how many times would a patient come in and go, Man, I think I'm, I got, this is some elaborate it's only 3% of the male population have that. What are you talking about, you know. So that was beautiful. Thanks. Thanks for sharing that. That's great. So, you know, maintaining mental health, obviously, it's, it's a daily, hourly job, you know, especially if you're in that world, you know, sometimes we have imposters syndrome. We go, man, I'm counseling these people. But really, I'm the one who sucked up, you know, right? So, I mean, I whatever. And so what, you know, what personal philosophies Do you adhere to on a daily basis then, and how has it evolved through your recovery? I

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 50:58

think it's two part. It's two part the first part is, is we have to all have 24 hours in a day. It's entirely up to me. How do I manage that? And the one thing I've learned during the academic periods, my internships, the hours, the strains on the schedule, especially now, I still block out time for me to read and be by myself. I schedule it once a week. It's like barring the baby being sick, or my kids being sick, or my wife really needed me. It's like, no, no, no. Like I'm in the office, in the lab, thinking about whatever it is. Maybe it's Napoleon Hill stuff. I'm trying to think and grow rich. I don't know, right, but, but that's that's what I do at this point. And I didn't always have that discipline to say no to things, hey, I got to go do this. But I have found that there's the only place that I'm able to escape and engage my imagination. In an incredibly healthy way, because it turns it on, turns it on. So mental health day to day, that is part of it. On a personal level, I've sought therapy. That's where my dog comes in, right? My father passed in June of 23 on my me, my wife's anniversary, and he asked, he's like, in the hospital, and, you know, he's things are starting to fail, right? My mom's getting ready to make a hard decision, and he's asking, Hey, is Mary pregnant? Mary pregnant now she's not pregnant. Boom, we found out she was pregnant, like, three days after he passed. I'm getting emotional thinking about that. So he's named Vincent Ruiz, the fifth cinco, after my father and we, my wife is like, Hey, this is bad. You're in a bad way, like, way down, way down. She's like, Hey, we're gonna go to Europe for a couple days. She swipes the fancy credit card. We go to Europe. And I'm like, in Bavaria, depressed, eating a schnitzel and abroad, and I'm depressed. And I see these fancy dogs at a dog park in the middle of garmish, right? And garnish, I guess, is like a nicer part of a resort type of area. And I see these dogs. It looks like the AKC comes to Europe, right? And I'm like, Oh, these things are amazing, right? Look, I heard you on that one. Look at this one. This one's jumping over things, right? So I go online, and I'm like, Man, I want to get a dog like me. So I go right to, like, the local pound, and I'm like, we're bailing the sucker out. It's missing an eye. It's got, like a tattoo, whatever it's got, chain, I don't know, whatever it's got a lot going on, missing stuff I want, I want to heal and have this dog and change this dog, right? And my wife overrules me, and that's how we got the Connie Corso Molly Pitcher. And she named, She named her Molly Pitcher because Molly Pitcher is from New Jersey. Her husband fell in battle, and she continued to fire on the gun. And I said, Whoa, I'm not going anywhere. So that's not what's happening. So as far as the self care thing, my dog became part of that for me, and like a therapeutic sense. Now, she's not a trained therapy dog, but what I needed is a reason to get out of the house and go for that

Dr. Spencer Baron: 53:33

walk a day. Yes, I needed to get out

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 53:37

of the house and go for a walk a day because the dog needs to walk, and I can't let my dog, she's looking to go do and all right, so I had to do that, and then I got to give her the good kibble. Can't give her the crappy kibble, so I gotta give myself the good kibble. See what we're doing now. We're splitting the kibble, and now I have a freezer full of beef, beef hearts and lungs and all this stuff, right? Dog, right? So interesting enough, though, how it works, and this is the belief structure, right? I'm gonna share a story with you about how we got to this, and what I think, the health thing, the dog was part of that, and then the dog also snores like my father. Now, that's true, not true. It's mildly interesting, but my mom would agree. My mom would be like, Wow, that's amazing. She really does sound like your dad, right? And she slept next to the guy for 40 something years, so she kind of knows, right? So, so those are the things that are metaphysical in nature, and maybe they require a degree of faith, but it doesn't matter, because I believe in and it's encouraged me to heal. So I give you that long winded story to share on the daily what does it look like? I think it's being available to yourself first and first and foremost. Hence why I shared that me blocking the time out to read and write, and I write every day. The journaling thing is an everyday practice, because if I let the ping pong balls keep going in here, kicking around like at bingo, where you do the hopper and they're right, well, it's probably not gonna help my clients. It's not gonna help the podcast. Probably not gonna help my meetings later, right? I gotta put some of them on paper and get my bingo placard straight, right, right, so then I can see it and know, like, oh, that's I'm. Little off today, right? And then I get to reflect back to these artifacts. Now, I have 1000s of pages at this point because it's been over 10 years of doing this. I'm like, hey, what was I thinking around something, something january 30, 2014, boom. And I open it, I look at it 11 years ago. I'm like, wow. Like, I'm not even the same person. As a matter of fact, that guy was really dumb. I think I don't even think the same way. Or you confirm or deny, and you can look back to like, Oh, I've grown a lot. Or, Hey, I still have that particular core quality or strength. So I think journaling is it? I think taking time out of my week, if you can do it daily, I would encourage that to anybody. I think it's intermittent flows of therapeutic process andor coaching. And I'll disclose money's a wonderful coach for me. I mean, he's the kind of coach that money is, the kind of guy that, if you're on a boat with him, right? And, boom, I use the boat as a Navy Seal, right? Boat goes down, and we crash, and we're an island, right? Monty's the kind of guy that will just take charge and start leading and put people in their strengths. Oh, you're good at picking crops, you know, flowers and plants get us food. You know how to hunt, right? You're gonna go in the water, right, start getting us together, and then, you know, he's gonna put people to task. Hey, what do you think you need? What do you think you think you need? What do you think you need? What do you think I need a Bible? That's a read. I need a book, right? I need I need entertainment. I need the Hobbit, right? Nice and thick. Roll through it, and then Manu will continue to organize everybody, right, and bring everybody together. Now we have entertainment. Now we have people to get food and build housing. We're leveraging skills. He's rallying people. And some people are saying, I want the Bible, I want the Bible, I want the tour, I want the Koran, whatever. And mine is kind of guys pretty different, like, it's kind of like, yeah, get the one you want that makes sense for you, whatever. And then he'll come back together at the night, once we stabilize, and be like, All right, you can pray in whatever book you want to pray, and I'm gonna pray with you, and then we're gonna watch these guys reenact the Hobbit, right? And I think that is the form of leadership that he has offered me as a coach. And I'm giving an example of stuff him and I discuss, and so that's world view perspective, right? Like, if I don't have the courage to go skiing on that mountain, right? And I'll meet him and start that conversation and those texts or quick calls like you shared, I'm using him as an example. But it's not just limited therapy. It's not just limited to coaching. It's constantly seeking that stuff and super high quality people. I've hit it off with some and others I have, and I think in some cases, they meet a person like me who nobody knows, and I bring the same energy. I think it kind of threatens some of the relationship when it's actually quite the opposite. I'm a really good student. I've run into that I don't know what that is or where that comes from, and it's maybe looking in the wrong places, because I'm a willing consumer of just people that know stuff I don't know, so willing to pay people to teach me, right? And I have run into that stuff where it's like, oh, like, Well, what do I have to teach you? I'm like, everything, because every single person I meet knows something I don't know. I encounter that sometimes. So I share all that. Say is selective attention, and then, you know, figuring out what season of life you're in. So I shared the grief version in 2023 I had to go back in therapy. I needed, I needed some therapy I needed, I needed some therapy for a little bit, because there's heavy, heavy, deep, deep, deep stuff, some of that resentment stuff came to the surface. I'm like, where's that I've thought about 20 years, right? But coaching constantly, getting ourselves out there and doing things. And I also think giving is a big part of it. And I don't know how it is for chiropractic, but pro bono work plays a role for me and my self care, right? Because I've been gifted all these opportunities, right? That maybe I worked hard for, maybe I didn't yet, if I don't repackage them and give it to some people that could benefit from it, I would be that's a moral failing. That's a moral failing for me. I think so. Those are the self care practices, journaling, scheduling time, making sure I stay engaged in my process, and then, you know, making sure that I give something, right? And sometimes giving is interesting. You know, this important beginning, you know, having somebody give, give, Vince, you gotta give. You gotta start giving more. I'm gonna give, what a compliment to people, because we can't give compliments in a negative state of mind. Oh, my God, that guy didn't have a PhD. As a PhD. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure he didn't graduate high school. So I share that as being open to everybody as a student and then hanging on the words that are shared. That's what I think I do well. I think I do that really well.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 58:54

Terry, are you seeing a theme here? This is great. This is great. I mean extraordinary. Let me ask you. Let me clarify one thing, though, are you always reading something positive and inspiring?

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 59:08

Season of Life? It depends. I found that when I was in the dissertation for about a year and a half, I was exclusively reading about onboarding and retention. I go through seasons. It depends. I'm able to sci fi it on a day, and I can quickly go to non fiction. I like autobiographies. I love a stack of lies when I'm ready for it. Yeah? Because anybody can write a stack of lies about themselves and then share it with the world and try to sell it right. Like, why not? Right? I think for me, I would say, can I add to the question? Yeah, in this vein, or genre, three of the most important books for me was number one is man search for me by Viktor Frankl. I think that needs to be in our public education system like tomorrow, right? Because it gives a framework, no matter what you believe. He's just an interesting, interesting human. That overcame a lot during the Holocaust, do his best work inside of a concentration camp, and kind of push things forward as a psychiatrist for the mental health world. The second book would be the autobiography of Malcolm X, because it shows his road to perdition and redemption, right? And how much change he had to undergo, from being a small time junkie thief to having influence beyond something I can't even comprehend, right? Because, you know you're doing something right when somebody tries to kill you. That's my grandfather would say. And then the last part would be the autobiography of Malcolm X right? Is because I'm sorry, Autobiography of Ben Franklin, I apologize because he's on the $100 bill. And why not? Like, come on, man, if you don't like the $100 bill, you're lying. You're lying. So why wouldn't I want to know a little bit about that guy? So then you get in there, right? And then, boom, I open it up, and I'm reading. I'm like, All right, who's this guy? He's on the hunt. I've got no hundreds at this point, 13 virtues. That's what I needed, free of free advice, free of debt and full of virtue. Ben freaking Franklin,

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:00:58

yeah, there you go. That's potent. There you go. Thanks for sharing that. Because sometimes, you know, people like to read about something negative, and, you know, downtrodden because they go, Wow, I'm not that bad. You know, I've done that before I go, I have a lot to be grateful for because I'm not there, you know, that kind of thing. So anyway, Vince, we're going to enter our favorite part of our, you know, the end of our program, and it's the rapid fire questions. We have, five of them that I think you're going to do real well with answering. You know, we try to be brief, you know, some concise answers. But man, listen, we get hung up on finding out more about your answer. So anyway, here we go. Are you ready for question number one, I am send it. Word has it. You are a dog lover, and you confirm that with your Kanye Corso, as we as we are as well. What is it about dogs that is so therapeutic for you,

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:02:05

how naive she is really in me, because she sees me as this big, yeah, and sometimes I see myself like that. Don't you? Love it, though. That's how she does for me.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:02:18

And how old is she?

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:02:21

Year and a half now, she'll be two this summer. Yeah, wow, wow. Big. 96 pounds.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:02:26

I was just gonna ask you that next 96 pounds, she's

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:02:29

great. We sunk a college education of training into her, and it's been worth every nickel. With every nickel, she's amazing.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:02:38

You got to be able to control a dog like that. They're, they're they're fantastic. Thanks for sharing that. Number two. Question number two, what is the most unexpected or ridiculous lesson that you learned about survival from your military days that you still use every day in life? On a

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:03:01

serious note, you can do everything right and have a catastrophic outcome. You can do everything wrong and get rewarded a valor award or metal and be known as a hero, nice, regardless of the fact that the men there know you were a dipshit. I'm

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:03:15

serious about that. So true. Man. That's great. Thank you. Question number three, if you could go back in time and give your younger self just one sentence of advice, what would it

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:03:30

be? Don't drink ever. No kidding, no, never, ever. There you go. God gave me the gifts and curses of my forefathers, and we, we suffer for the sins of our fathers. Alcohol. My I have a son. It's just not even part of it. I'm liable that would make that would make me do he would be doing something would make me not like him at that point, because we know too much at this point as a family, okay? Because people are going to want to blame genetics, behavior, environment. The AMA says that disease, that addiction, is a disease. And I'm here to tell you wholeheartedly, the AMA is wrong. It is a combination of genetics, behavior and environment. You do get a vote, and my son will have a vote, and it'll be, don't, don't drink. So that's what I would have told my younger self. Beautiful

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:04:15

question number four, imagine you're stuck on a road trip with one of your past selves, the military events, the struggling vents, or the therapist Vince, which one would be the most entertaining, and why

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:04:29

the active addict Vince, active addict Vince is absolutely why active addict Vince is absolutely insane.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:04:44

Come on, give me an example.

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:04:46

It's dark, right? But if there's an addict that hears this, they'll get it. I not only did I shoot arrow and I smoked cocaine like was a sport, and eventually, when the coke wears off, right, all the blinds are drawn. I'm crawling around on my knees looking for freaking dry. All the smoke because I think it's Coke, or I'm peeking out of the blinds, all paranoid, having psychotic moments. So if I was to zoom out and I was to watch that monkey in a cage, that monkey did some wild, wild, wild stuff. So I watched that monkey right there, even more so than the battlefield monkey, because he was pretty rad too, but I didn't do anything special in battle. Man. They were like, Hey, stand here. Look there. Do this. That's what I did.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:05:23

Wow, it's a good thing you didn't grow up in South Florida during the 70s and 80s, because I'm

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:05:29

not making it out of that.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:05:34

My my that movie pain and gain with Wahlberg and oh yeah. Those are I'm set. Those are my friends. Those are, those are friends of ours that we hung out with. It's no it's anyway, that's a whole nother interview. All right, thanks for sharing. Though. Question number five, what do you want to be remembered for?

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:05:59

Three things that are my values and the statements aren't actual values. It weaves in My Value Sets. Right? Is I want to be known right? Everything is an afterthought, but I want to be known as the man right, that had fun, helped people and made money doing it.

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:06:16

That's good stuff. I can't

Dr. Vince Ruiz: 1:06:18

see anything else in it, and it's not limited to one or the other. But at this point, my decision making process, in my business and personal life, with everything, everything, point blank, period, the criteria, I'm not sure. Should we do it? Should we not do it? Hey, can we have fun? Help people make money doing if we can do two of those three things as a practice, each hour is generally going to do it, and that means sometimes we lose some money or break even, or whatever. Yet it's the right thing to do. I have a moral obligation, because I'm going to live longer, older than we be young, right? And the multiplication effort is, hey, I did the right thing, right? There, I throw it out to the universe. And naturally what happens is that catches up in the back end, because, like, I shared the market Vince is constantly doing that, right? Like, how, you know, Vince, right? Like, hey, what? It took a little bit dip. I went short on Vince option. I should go short on Vince. Now my money, it's going the wrong way, right? It's ultimately, in my experience is that's why we know, for us having fun, helping people and ultimately making money doing it, because that's the best way I can help my team. They can feed their families, pay the mortgage, put kids through college. I want to just be part of that story. The point zero was 000, 1% of the story, right? Because maybe it's just a name on the checks and an interaction plussing them up for them to go build their own practice. But that's the dude I want to be known as, like, oh, I worked for Vince two years and like, man, he set the groundwork for me to just that's what I want. I want to have people around me that were connected to me at the right phase of life. And it's a flex. It's like, I bumped into Vince and then, boom, I went this way and just right. That's what I would love to be known as,

Dr. Spencer Baron: 1:07:41

Dr Vince Ruiz, your energy is magnetic. Thanks. Doctor, really, no, it is. It's a draw. And when that happens, you would just consume the people that need you most. That's your your task will be fulfilled forever. Thank you for being on the show. Man, appreciate it. Thank you. Thank you for listening to today's episode of The cracking backs podcast. We hope you enjoyed it. Make sure you follow us on Instagram at cracking backs podcast. Catch new episodes every Monday. See you next time you.