Honestly
Roasting the Wh*res
Chelsea had an amazing time at a wedding with her roommate and Lindsay didn't let her family pressure her into scuba diving. Then, what's up with the Tom Brady roast? Could this move be a fumble for his brand, or is it a touchdown for his versatility? But at least Nikki Glaser is keeping it classy and opening the rape conversation for up-and-coming female comedians. And what did Harrison Butker say at commencement???
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Chelsea had an amazing time at a wedding with her roommate and Lindsay didn't let her family pressure her into scuba diving. Then, what's up with the Tom Brady roast? Could this move be a fumble for his brand, or is it a touchdown for his versatility? But at least Nikki Glaser is keeping it classy and opening the rape conversation for up-and-coming female comedians. And what did Harrison Butker say at commencement???
Connect with Honestly
thehonestlypodcast.com
IG: @thehonestlyshow
TikTok: @thehonestlyshow
Chelsea's IG: @chelsea_turano
Lindsay's IG: @dr.lindsayregehr
YouTube: The Honestly Podcast
Designed by plant scientists and bartenders. Use Code HONESTLY15 for 15% off.
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.
Hello and welcome to this week's episode of Honestly, I'm Chelsea.
Speaker 2:Toronto and I'm Dr Lindsay and each week we are so honest you wish that we would lie and we share all of our issues. And this week we're also talking about our vacations. We're talking about Tom Brady, graduation commencement speeches and nonsense purses.
Speaker 1:Perfect.
Speaker 2:Okay, so what is, what's your honestly good moment of the week?
Speaker 1:I went to the wedding and I made a lot of people happy. A good friend of mine has been diagnosed with something and my roommate asked if I would spend some like particularly spend time, because this individual came solo and I was like, let's motherfucking go, this is what I put on the planet for. So we had a great time. I told him about one of my sexcapades over the years and that had them rolling in there and then the next day they're like chelsea. I have not laughed that hard. We were crying, we were like falling into each other's arms. So that was beautiful.
Speaker 2:My negative, honestly you don't even have to have a negative one do I have one?
Speaker 1:no, it's not about me personally. We'll get to it a little bit later okay, um, let's see.
Speaker 2:I would say my honestly good moment of the week was that this vacation that I just went on was purely for scuba, scuba diving, scuba. I said that really weird and I didn't want to scuba dive. However, when my husband was getting certified, I was there to cheer him on and check it out. The dive master was saying you can come back later and get certified. You're gonna going to want to get certified. Once you see, once he tells you all the things that you saw down there, you can do it. We have time for you tomorrow.
Speaker 2:And then my family was saying I just didn't get a bad instructor. You know you should do it here. You should finish up. You're going to want to do it. It's gonna be so much better Once you're in the ocean. You, you're in the ocean, you're gonna want to do it. I'm just like no, I'm good, I'm good. No, thank you. And also is backing me up saying no, it's not for her, she's good. So I thought maybe I would succumb to peer pressure after hearing this at least 10 times, but I really stuck to my guns. Good, and being in the water is not for me, right, yeah I get that, yeah, so I'm really happy I did not go scuba diving.
Speaker 2:good for you. Yeah, well done, well done, I know, okay. So what else? Do you have any issues?
Speaker 1:Do I have issues? I have an issue with the hypocrisy in society. Particularly, we're going to talk about the roast, but so it was all dudes. Kevin Hart was the host I'm assuming everybody knows this by now, because it's been all over everything but there was a bunch of dudes on the panel, along with Nikki Glaser.
Speaker 2:Glaser.
Speaker 1:Yep, nikki Glaser, who also had her HBO Live performance Saturday May 11th. So this has been her month. Last month was hannah, this week, this month, rather, is nikki glassard. Okay, so kevin hart's introducing everyone. He's just talking about performance or just throwing even it's a roast, you're gonna throw shade, but it wasn't personal per se, but necessarily like their actions or their performance, whatever. So he gets to Nikki and he's like she's a whore that's the best he can come up with.
Speaker 2:That's literally every single female comic that they roast. If they're gonna roast a female comic, she's a whore, she's got a big pussy, she is ugly, she. You know, like cheap shots, low shots that are not really creative shots, I'm just disappointed with society like that.
Speaker 1:You're still calling us whores, just be it. And I felt like the energy dropped out, like I felt like it like bottomed out because I was just so disappointed. I was like you're better than this and this is worse. This is all you think of us at this point. Yeah, I don't care if you're roasting, say something creative, you're, you're better than that. So I was very disappointed. On a positive note, during nikki's hbo special, she talks about rape. Oh, I was like okay, because what I'm experiencing with my own stand-up is getting some feedback from dudes, primarily when I try and like broach the subject of rape in a comical way.
Speaker 1:Right, that's what you do if you're skilled enough that you can say something that just sheds light on a topic, and dudes are always like I'm triggered. I was like so if somebody else kicks the door open, I could just ride in on their coattails. Yeah, yeah, I was like see. And then I was hoping that my comedic friends that I'm practicing with three days a week, I hope they see it because I'll be like see, I told you about this something.
Speaker 2:Yes, and I heard her on another podcast and when she was talking the things that she said she was talking about, I was thinking Chelsea needs to watch her because she's saying the same things that you're saying in a different way and it's along the same lines of comedy and topics.
Speaker 1:I did watch her. That's exactly what I did. There's, that's exactly what I did. There's nothing she didn't do that I haven't done. Well, obviously she's good and she's better, right, so we'll say that. But the way in which she performs is the way in which there isn't, like story story punchline, story story punchline. There is, but I wouldn't call it a punchline, it's just entertainment at that moment and you're also in like in the same age range yeah, yeah, she talks about not wanting kids. I was like yep.
Speaker 1:She does represent a large part of the population. So even with Kim Kardashian at, the roast got booed. I just feel like they don't treat women it's like, oh, welcome to 2024, chelsea, but I feel like they're not treating women the same way.
Speaker 2:I don't even get why they were booing Kim Kardashian just because she was there. Yeah, she didn't even say anything and they booed her. I know she said hi. I think she said hey no, she came up, she said she came up on stage and she said I know that a lot of people make fun of your height and everyone's going boo. She got one sentence out. She was leading up to the joke and never started booing her. I'm like she did nothing.
Speaker 1:Let her speak, let her live yeah, no, society still thinks that they can control women. What they say, what they wear, they're innards they?
Speaker 2:they think kim kardashian should just be something to look at and not spoken to, or she should not be speaking. She made a sex tape and that's all they see her for not all the other things.
Speaker 1:Right, she dwarfs everyone in earnings, but you don't talk about that. So, yeah, I, just I, I really struggle with that. What you wear.
Speaker 2:And Nikki Glaser wears cute dresses.
Speaker 1:She wears sexy dresses she's got a banging body, mm-hmm, so no one's distracted by that, no, and if they are, they seem to like they're able to swallow it down, uh-huh. Anyway, I know I was frustrated by that Poor Tom Brady. I know they're like oh oh, it's a roast. He went in. He knew it's too soon to be roasting this poor kid. Um uh, you know he didn't do anything wrong, I think, when netflix was like here's a great opportunity to put him in light. I just the poor kid. I'm gonna continue to defend him because he's still lost and he hasn't found his way.
Speaker 1:I feel like the example is for astronauts that go to the moon, usually at a younger age. It's like what else can I accomplish that's better than landing on the moon? And a lot of times they turn to alcohol because there's nothing to like. They're hard workers. Tom Brady is number one, the most professional, most successful at a very hard job industry. There's nothing harder than the nfl. I mean there is, but it's definitely one of the most like. Like what's the word I'm looking for?
Speaker 1:it's difficult you're like 0.001 percent right. You're better than most of humanity, and so there is nothing that this poor guy can't sink his teeth into that is going to challenge him the same way. We loved him for the little football soldier that he was, and now we just put him out to pasture. A lot like our veterans. We were like I don't know, good luck, here's a roast. And they like kick his ass out the door.
Speaker 2:They're like you're done see, I think that this was more of pr and a way to see him in a little bit of a different light.
Speaker 3:Sure.
Speaker 2:Because he's going to start broadcasting later in the NFL season. So they have to break down the wall of him being this icon and this god and this untouchable person to being a sports broadcaster. So in the middle, let's make him a little bit more human.
Speaker 1:It's called Saturday Night Live.
Speaker 2:That's what it's called.
Speaker 1:But no, because he is not funny, they can help him. He could, you could be coached. You have good writers. He does his best. He shows a vulnerable side when he can't get the lines down. Nobody's funny, but everybody can be coached up on how to be funny. I don't think that was the right way. Personally, I was disappointed that we trashed him so harshly.
Speaker 2:I think you know, a Saturday Night Live is probably also in his future, but I think most of the roasting was done by NFL players, correct? Yeah, lots of his peers and he has to sign off on doing this.
Speaker 1:He didn't sign off on his kids, Giselle no.
Speaker 2:Well, they didn't talk about his kids.
Speaker 1:Yes, they did. You don't know, they talked about Giselle a lot. They talked about his kids.
Speaker 2:Kids were the one thing off limits. That's what I heard. No, it wasn't. What did they?
Speaker 1:say. That's why it's a good opportunity for you to be on the same page with the conversation.
Speaker 2:I tried to watch it and netflix wouldn't let me watch it. You've been back. No, seriously, I was trying to watch it on netflix and it was like not available I appreciate that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, you should watch it.
Speaker 2:Once netflix allows me to, I will definitely watch it but, yeah, there were oh, because I heard, because nikki glazer was saying she chose not to write about her, the children oh gosh she personally made it a point and here you are.
Speaker 1:You have a woman who's demonstrating, like grace said. I chose to honor these parameters. Sure dudes, they don't give a fuck who. They offend. Everybody's fair game. Children, okay, come on. Women, well, in the spirit of it's a roast. They think they can get away with anything and I just feel like the double standards of comedy is just kind of lights.
Speaker 2:It really fires me up also, this was a live roast, correct? Yeah, I do believe that when you do a roast that's not live, they will edit out the jokes that are inappropriate and below the belt. But this was a free-for-all. Nothing got edited out, it was sloppy I thought it was a sloppy recording.
Speaker 1:It wasn't tight. Kevin. Kevin hart was just kind of all over the place. If you've ever, there are certain comedy shows with certain comics that are, if you have a white comic and a black comic the experience is different, right and also have you seen two different?
Speaker 2:have you seen both a white comic and a black comic?
Speaker 1:the experience is different, right and also have you seen both a white comic and a black comic?
Speaker 2:I've seen kevin hart. I watch his routine and then well, not, how about live? No okay.
Speaker 1:If you've seen them live, it's a different like. It's just a different experience. I don't know I I saw Cat Williams like twice, as opposed to like Bill Burr. Bill Burr comes out, that's it. Yeah, it's a traditional performance. This one there's, I don't even know, it's like a shit show. There's like it's just coming and going. It feels a little bit more of a circus, like friends are on stage and it's just kind of loosey goosey until he gets out there.
Speaker 2:So you're like what is this? Well, traditionally on comedy central, when they have the roast, it's pre-recorded, so they keep it to an hour and a half, whatever the time is. This was, how long was this? Three hours long, something like that, yeah if this was on tv edited, I bet you those jokes wouldn't even make the cut, and a lot of jokes probably wouldn't make the cut but it was slap, slap city because it was live.
Speaker 2:Netflix needs to stop doing live things. It never turns out well with the love is blind reunion. That was supposed to be live, netflix crashed. I can't watch the tom brady roast because netflix says I can't stream it for some odd reason. Something should just not be live oh, that's fair and I think that if tom brady has ever seen a roast, you know that people will do some low blows I don't think he should have done it.
Speaker 1:I don't think it was in his best interest from a pr standpoint. There's other ways to humanize yourself and be more relatable and you know he's already having a hard time accepting the fact that, a he had to retire, b now he's like that announcer which is like I'm not. Just because I had to retire doesn't mean like I'm at this stage of my life. I think this is where, like football players go to die it is, but he's still in the football world because it's not enough.
Speaker 1:You're not a player, you're just like a talking head. You really have no street cred. It's just you know. I'm glad that he's still a part of it, but what he should do is try and like have ownership, try and buy in or something on the team he is.
Speaker 2:He's trying to buy into the raiders?
Speaker 1:I believe yeah and like be more of a gm, something right. In the meantime, you can do some announcing. I just think it's sad. I think it's sad.
Speaker 2:I mean, we did suggest that he should go into modeling, he could. You know, being a sports broadcaster is kind of the last resort, yeah, but also being a GM. You get a lot of hate for that too, because if your team sucks then it's your fault.
Speaker 1:Well, he's used to having hate when he doesn't perform, and also just because you were the world's best quarterback doesn't mean you're a good GM.
Speaker 2:Look at John Elway yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1:But that's okay. At least he's on the sidelines rather than in the booth, because when you're in the booth, you're just as far away, as far as removed. As a fan.
Speaker 2:Or maybe what they're going to do who's removed as, like, a fan? Or maybe what they're gonna do who's the one that interviews all the football players now, I don't know. Maybe he'll be more on the sidelines in the locker room chit-chatting like a little bit more relaxed interview instead of just stuck up in the booth all the time I just and also, I think the roast is a good way to see how he can handle all this criticism, all these things throwing at, throwing at you, like how is your sense of humor?
Speaker 2:How will you respond?
Speaker 1:You don't have to have a sense of humor when you're announcing. All you just have to do is read the thing or just talk and keep talking and talk over each play.
Speaker 2:You have to have some kind of personality. He's got enough?
Speaker 1:No, you don't, because Troy Aikman didn't. He's just like a robot, you don't have to have a personality.
Speaker 2:People are expecting a personality from Tom Brady. Expectations are high.
Speaker 1:Well, they should lower them. This is not the right move for him either.
Speaker 2:No, it's not. I think he's only really doing half a season. I don't even think he's coming in for the full thing. So I think he'll do it for a little bit and then go on to owning a team, and then, by that point you just need something.
Speaker 1:He could sink his teeth into it and be the absolute best at what he's doing.
Speaker 2:He should go into business maybe he should start a flag football league there is that other, that that's that arena football yeah, no, that's for losers, it's just for the people who can't get into the NFL.
Speaker 1:Yeah, a friend of mine is playing in that. Sorry you're not a loser.
Speaker 2:Oh, carlo is oh Carlo Kemp. No, sorry, you're not a loser. No, I'm not. No, they're better than we are. That's true. I never claimed to be a football player, no, or good at it, yeah, no me neither.
Speaker 1:Okay. So as it relates to hollywood being hypocritical and just society not treating women the way that would equal even steven there is. Who is it that spoke at the commencement?
Speaker 2:oh, the kansas city chief's kicker yeah, what's his name?
Speaker 2:harrison butker. Yeah, he gave a commencement speech at Benedictine College, I believe it's called, in Kansas. Yeah, his PR is working overtime. Let me just tell you what he said. Okay, for the ladies present today, congratulations on an amazing accomplishment. You should be proud of all that you have achieved to this point in your young lives. I want to speak directly to you briefly, because I think it is you, the women, who have had the most diabolical lies told to you. How many of you are sitting here now about to cross the stage and thinking all about the promotions and titles you're going to get in your career? Some of you may go on to lead successful careers in the world, but I would venture to guess that the majority of you are most excited about your marriage and your children that you will bring into this world. And then he said I can tell you that my beautiful wife, isabel, would be the first to say that her life truly started when she began living her vocation as a wife and a mother.
Speaker 1:Okay, but that is not the most controversial comment. That's not, no, the one that he. What does he say about the month? And he's like I'm not talking about the. Pride month.
Speaker 2:Oh.
Speaker 1:The month of Pride.
Speaker 2:He said the month of Pride is also a diabolical sin.
Speaker 1:There was something else he said he like threw like a side shade comment.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's all I saw, okay. Like a side shade comment oh, that's all I saw, okay. And also that the most important title a woman could have his homemaker get back in the kitchen. Ladies, we don't belong outside, I don't know how to even respond to this well, he was giving the speech at a very conservative catholic school, so I guess that makes sense that his catholic ways are coming out.
Speaker 1:Okay, ready this is the comment, not the deadly sin sort of pride that has an entire month dedicated to it, but the god-centered pride that is cooperating with the holy ghost to glorify him I don't even know what that means he is saying referred to pride, which celebrates the lgbq lbgtq community, as a deadly sin. So I'm not talking about the deadly sin that oh yeah, he said it was a deadly sin.
Speaker 2:Sorry, not diabolical sin it's not the point.
Speaker 1:But the point is that he, like referred to it, like the entire month dedicated to it. But I'm talking about the pride you'd have celebrating the god-centered and the holy ghost to glorify him. I don't get the last part uh, you're using your pride not to celebrate other individuals, but rather using that pride to celebrate god and the holy ghost um, which is why he said pride month is a sin.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm not talking about the deadly sins that relate to the pride of an entire month, the way in which he kind of just slipped it in. Yeah, did you watch the video? Yeah, I did. Yeah, he says it. It's just like yo, brother. But people are more concerned about the comment about pride. I also think it's pretty offensive to women. Oh, it shouldn't be a zero-sum game as to who's more offended, but I certainly was even steven on that one.
Speaker 2:He was even steven on lgbtq plus and women both. Yeah, no, he didn't. He didn't like mince any words. I mean he didn't talk more. He slipped in the pride month being a sin and celebrating anyone of an alternative lifestyle as being a sin. So he slipped that one in. But he really made a point that women should just stay in the kitchen and you'll make your man very successful if you are in the kitchen helping him out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm sure his wife loves being a homemaker to one of the most successful kickers in the nfl. Yeah fuck you if I had nfl money as a wife? Sure I'll stay home, sure that sounds amazing. Yeah, it does sound amazing, and I bet I have nannies, I have probably a cook and I probably have an Amex card. That's like yes, just don't bother me during the season. Yeah, a bunch of bullshit. You're so out of touch. Who are these people that are speaking to us? I was like who do you represent?
Speaker 2:Very conservative.
Speaker 1:Mitch McConnell.
Speaker 2:Rich white men. Oh my God.
Speaker 1:Why? And to us it was like who do you represent? Very conservative, mitch, mcconnell, rich white men? Oh my god, why? And you want to take my ivf away.
Speaker 2:I would love to. Oh my gosh. I would love to hear her response to what he said, because of course she's gonna be like yeah, I love it, it's fucking awesome because we're rich and I can do whatever I want. Oh, you'd be a homemaker when you're broke, I know, yeah, trying to meet a broke mom, that sounds miserable. You don't have a nanny, you don't have a chef, you don't have your free amex card to do whatever you want with right, uh-huh, yeah, totally different scenarios such tone, deaf bigotry.
Speaker 1:He's so misogynistic.
Speaker 2:I'm just like you should be low-key, canceled so you know, when colin kaepernick did the kneeling, yeah, he got kicked out of the nfl yeah isn't this a kicking out of nfl well, I'm sure they don't think it is they don't care about women. Let me, like you know women they're so okay with.
Speaker 1:If you want to beat your, your boo you, do, you, you, you.
Speaker 2:We won't ask any questions, and if it does come out, we will bury that shit so deep that everyone will forget about it.
Speaker 1:Oh, we sent him to classes and he's been penalized. You don't give a shit about women. We find him a thousand dollars. Oh, we make you wear pink for the month of March. Awesome. Oh, which is becoming a neutral color anyway. Oh, which is becoming a neutral color anyway. Oh my gosh, I'm so frustrated with society.
Speaker 2:Do you think that the chiefs will do anything?
Speaker 1:I hope Taylor gets involved.
Speaker 2:Oh, he did quote Taylor Swift.
Speaker 1:So I hope she gets involved.
Speaker 2:She's going to lay down the law. Do not use her words in a speech that is so anti-woman yeah, so she's our hope. She's our hope yep, so this is the one time I'm like come on, taylor do something.
Speaker 1:We need you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we need you more than now, than ever so, but I'm sure nothing will happen, because that's the way life goes you're a second class speaking of ladies, what did poookie get lately?
Speaker 1:She got some dumb ass shit. She goes to Hermes and gets like this purse. It's like a little satchel thing.
Speaker 2:It looks like a handkerchief made into a satchel.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like a hobo Remember the old hobo, like little satchel they had on the end of a stick. I'm sure I'm not allowed to say that, but it's been long enough.
Speaker 2:It's been long enough.
Speaker 1:It's been long enough. I don't know what the correct term is. Besides, hobo, it's okay, it's funny. Now, right, it's like kitschy. So the hobo bag that's at the end of the stick that he's walking, and so that's what it's like. It's got to be a minimum of four thousand dollars, minimum. And then she gets this like dumbass chachki, like little keychain attachment, that's like it's a horse, yeah, and I'm like what? I hope to attach your hobo bag do you gotta think they give it to her for free?
Speaker 2:no, I don't think. No, they definitely don't well, it's stupid.
Speaker 1:So just goes to prove that just because you may have money doesn't mean you'll make good choices, which is good to know. I'll still say, I'll still be me.
Speaker 2:I'll still be me and I'll still make dumb decisions.
Speaker 1:Dumb ass decisions. You know, honestly, one thing that I realized is I'm not living life to the fullest and I'm kind of dumb yeah, of dumb yeah, like the way I heard like my caitlyn and her friends. They're about 33, 34, so these are my peers. They have so many life experiences, could speak to so many different things. They travel all the time they're doing they're just filling up their days in such a way that I was like I am not fully living. Same Well, you choose not to fully live.
Speaker 2:I don't really know what to do to fully live I don't either, I don't either.
Speaker 1:So I told Rochelle yesterday and I was like how do I fill up my days? She's like I don't know. Do I mean like?
Speaker 2:I don't know. I mean, if I had the budget to travel all the time, then I would just travel all the time I think we could.
Speaker 1:I don't, yeah, well, I don't necessarily have a budget to travel all the time, but I could probably start budgeting for a trip, true, like if I made that a priority.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I could do it no more buying stupid shit no more starbucks no, keep getting the starbucks, I know it's not gonna make a difference.
Speaker 1:No more clothes. I haven't. I don't really buy a lot of clothes. Um, I did for the wedding. Yeah, maybe I'll re-up with like a zara 45 dress. Sure, I'm not. I'm not, I'm not, respectfully, I don't think that's what's holding me back.
Speaker 2:No, what do you think?
Speaker 1:is. I'm just not budgeting for it because I make the money. Yeah, I just don't. I don't know, I just oh, I don't have anyone to go with, I don't know where I should go. They're going everywhere.
Speaker 2:True, they're millennials, they want experiences.
Speaker 1:Or they just haven't. They're dinks Dual income no kids, yeah, they got enough money to do it and they have these remote jobs where they can like work and go.
Speaker 2:I know that's the key. You need a remote job.
Speaker 1:I do, yeah, I just feel like I'm not living a big enough life because I do have so much time and so many more like so much energy within me that could still be like tapped and utilize.
Speaker 2:I feel like I'm tapped out during the week and then the weekends come and I'm like I'm still kind of tired but I got to go do something. Yeah, I don't know. I don't really know what else I want to do. I don't like the outdoors that much. That puts a real damper on a lot of activities.
Speaker 1:I don't know what you do also.
Speaker 2:I like to lay by the pool. That's where you will find me great. But someone did tell me that I could go on a glamping backpacking experience where they will literally just drop you off at the tent that's glamped out and have food and electricity and all the things. You actually don't even have to hike to get there. They just drop you off at the tent that's glamped out and have food and electricity and all the things you actually don't even have to hike to get there. You just drop you off, you sleep there for a night and then go home. I'm like maybe, but also, this is the thing about glamping and camping I'm paying to be inconvenienced and I have a hard time with that. So I don't, I don't see that in my future. Yeah, okay, sweet, anything else?
Speaker 1:I don't think so okay.
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