My Story - Bill Zirzow's Healing Touch of Community and Personal Growth (Part 1) | Episode 125

My Story - Bill Zirzow's Healing Touch of Community and Personal Growth (Part 1) | Episode 125

Chapter Markers
0:00 Mental Health Recovery and Career Advancement
4:32 From Business to Faith
11:26 Lessons in Grief and Resilience
21:57 Creating a Gym for Recovering Addicts

When Bill Zirzow stepped into our studio, the air was thick with stories of resilience waiting to be shared. His family's odyssey through mental health recovery interlaced with my own healing journey, creating a tapestry of trials and triumphs that proves we're stronger together. Our heart-to-heart unveils the raw and transformative power of embracing vulnerabilities, a conversation that's bound to resonate with anyone touched by the complexities of mental health.

Transitioning from the intimacies of family struggles, we welcome a local entrepreneur who, alongside his beloved Cindy, breathed life into Town Money Saver. His narrative is a profound reflection on how the intertwining of business savvy and deep spirituality can ignite success and repair the fraying seams of personal life. We honor the memory of his son Ben, whose legacy exemplifies the indelible mark one soul can leave by weathering life’s storms with hope and a heart to serve.

Bringing our episode to a close, we celebrate the vision of a couple transforming their grief into a beacon of hope. Their dream: a gym for recovering addicts in Mansfield, a sanctuary of support and second chances. Their story is a testament to the unyielding belief in the restorative power of community and the courage it takes to rewrite one’s narrative, even in the face of adversity. Join us for a journey through pain and purpose, where each chapter underscores the importance of fighting the good fight—together.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to the Voices for Voices TV show and podcast. Voices for Voices is the number one ranked podcast and TV show where people turn to for expert mental health recovery and career advancement intelligence. Our Voices for Voices TV show and podcast is all about teaching you insanely actionable techniques to help you prosper, grow your self-worth and your personal brand. So if you are a high achiever or someone who wants more out of life, whether mentally, physically or spiritually, why don't you make sure to subscribe to our podcast and TV show right now? As you can see, voices for Voices TV show and podcast publishes episodes that focus on case studies, real life examples, actionable tips and, in the trenches, reports and interviews from subscribers just like you. Reports and interviews from subscribers just like you. That sounds like something that could help you personally or professionally. Then why don't you make sure to join us by subscribing? And so you probably see a subscribe button somewhere close to where you're viewing this or listening to this TV show and podcast. Why don't you join us? We do have a pretty monumental goal to help 3 billion people over the course of my lifetime and beyond. So any help is appreciated, and we also are a 501c3 nonprofit, so every cent that you or somebody you know is able to donate. We would love to have you join us on our journey to help people here in Summit County, northeast Ohio, across the United States and even across the world across the United States and even across the world.

Speaker 1: 2:15

So today's episode, our guest comes to us through one of my former students. One of my former students, we just finished up a capstone marketing course. Up a capstone marketing course and through the work that he was doing, the transparency of sharing stories, not only real life, professionally in business, but also sharing some of his experiences as a family member, as a brother to Ben, and Ben is Tommy. So Tommy was my student, tommy Zerzo was my student and as I learned more about Tommy and Ben, as I learned more about Tommy and Ben, as really Tommy learned about me and my active recovery, which, if you want to check that out on episode 106, we go through my active recovery journey that I'm on, and so, with having conversations before class and after class with Tommy, one and two really have an opportunity to interview him and or his, his father, bill, for our tv show and podcast, and so today we're very grateful to have in studio my former student, tommy zerzo's dad, mr bill zerzo. Thank you for joining us today. Oh, thanks.

Speaker 2: 3:50

Thanks for having me, justin uh, thank you for joining us today. Thanks for having me, justin. I want to say it's a real blessing to come here and obviously you touch the heart of our family. It's time you would come home and share your story and what you were doing. And, again, I think there's a lot more for me to learn, but from what I understand, as I share what's impacted our family, it means a lot to us. And then this whole journey has been, you know, both a big struggle and, at the same time, a blessing, that especially in humility and to open our hearts to others that are, you know, struggling with some of the same stuff. So I look forward to sharing this time with you and sharing our story. I guess, if it hopefully helps somebody, yeah absolutely little bit about your background.

Speaker 1: 4:38

So you're a full-blown, since 1992 businessman. That started with your wife, cindy, an organization called Town Money Saver. Can you just talk maybe a little bit about how that came about?

Speaker 2: 4:54

Yeah. So I graduated from Cleveland State University and a communications degree actually, and we're going to get married and I had to find a job and a guy said you should try sales. I didn't like salespeople, I didn't want to be in sales. That's all I've done my whole life. So you never know, you got to open your heart, up to your gifts, you know, and uh, so really I worked for a few different companies and we eventually lived in grafton, ohio, and some of the local businesses said you should try something, just local here, you know, to help. And in fact me and my wife met playing in a band. So I was still kind of in a band at the time, wasn't really my interest, but to do a business. But within a months it blew away anything I had seen. So I took some of the elements of the other places I worked and from there on it's 31 years later. So we've been really blessed with the success of that business.

Speaker 1: 5:47

Yeah, it's awesome and you also have a passion for Christ and that I think, with craziness going on in the world, I think that that is a good thing for somebody who either is a follower, believer or is not. And can you maybe talk a little bit how that has maybe helped your mind and spiritually, as you've kind of gone through the process with starting and running Town, money Saver but then also starting a family? Oh no, definitely.

Speaker 2: 6:26

Thanks. First of all, I was cradle Catholic, born Catholic, you know, attended mass sacraments and probably like a lot just showed up. You know, I really wasn't that invested. And then, around 07, 08, we had four children. Our marriage was basically over. You know, we were both kind of like we done and, like my wife, she had gone to rehab fact, st Gregory retreat center and I woke him a little plug and she said they shared there how we like to be driving and, you know, crisis in the back, like hey, I can take that for you. Like no, I got it, I got it until you crash. And then you're like, all right, christ, I'll let you take over.

Speaker 2: 7:10

So I know, the moment I mean I sat there I said Lord, something's got to give. I'm not sure what to do. You know it's a wreck a lot of drinking, a lot of fighting. You know just behavior you didn't want in a family life. And it wasn't even a Bible, it was some Catholic book I had laying around. I remember praying, opening it, and the first sentence was you know, satan's number one goal is to destroy the family. And that's when it really hit. That's when I know it was grace and the Holy Spirit's like, all right, I don't want this to happen. So it took a long time. It's still a work in progress, so there's a long way to go.

Speaker 2: 7:45

But now I was born, I think, with the virtues of our faith. You know, I was in that first sales job, being trained these guys are kind of BSing people and stuff and I knew like this isn't right. So I know it was inside me, but that really brought it out, that incident and then my turning to Christ All right, I've got to put you in charge, you've got to be number one. Obviously, I was submitting to some of the false gods of money. We had a very successful business. It was really rolling at that time Pleasure, honor, stuff like that. Really, one of the first things was a guy called from church and said would you start to do adoration, which I didn't even know what it was. They started a little men's group. This was back in 2009. I remember I was at the moment of saying yes to anything with the faith, so that really, in fact, this morning I was at mass and we have a little Cursillo men's group right after mass. So I'm so blessed and so so much fruit has come from this journey of doing, especially as we talk. You know we've had some really bad nothing worse, I think, than what we've experienced in our life. So if it wasn't for that, I definitely wouldn't be here talking to you, that's for sure. So no, and then to the business.

Speaker 2: 9:01

Our motto is serve others, you win. I preach all the time if you want to make a lot of money, it can't be about the money. You know it's got to be about the relationship. It's got to be about relationship. It's got to be about it. I mean, I've really just had a new franchisee. We just opened a brand new North Canton, right down the street from you. Well, right in Walsh University there, and the girl there really appreciate it. I said you know it's got to be a ministry. You know it's got to be something. You go out and you're looking to be present and to be available if you can and in any way lift other people up. So, and if we get to it, my son obviously I was. I don't know if I'm spilling the beans talking about my son that we've lost, but there's a phenomenal story that someone posted on Facebook. That kind of ties some of this together. But anyway, I'll stop there.

Speaker 1: 9:44

Yeah, no great transition. So one of your sons, Ben, one of his favorite quotes from St Francis of Assisi is start by doing what's necessary, then do what's possible and suddenly you are doing the impossible. Can you talk to maybe that quote? Or, and just about Ben in general, to share with our viewers, our listeners, or if they're checking out our transcript, that everybody makes an impact in the world and how, even with an unfortunate life cut short, has and, with his legacy, is continuing to hopefully help and inspire others?

Speaker 2: 10:36

yeah, um, yeah, in fact we put we were waiting for the headstone, but on his little we put a little marker there and we said, you know, happiest making others happy and if I had to kind of put it in the fewest words, uh, ben was just so selfless. I mean he would be, he was the life of the party which allowed this to a fault. You know, you mix in alcohol and other stuff and he's a mental. You know. Ben definitely, you know, I think, was bipolar. I don't know if he formally died. Well, he was because he was on different medications. So we had some mental health in the family. We have a lot of that and so, in spite of that, I mean he really was, amazingly, you know, when he did something, put his heart to it, very successful, you know.

Speaker 2: 11:23

And maybe I could best sum it up by sharing this little story. So, one of our greatest gifts after we lost Ben, which was August 15th, if you see the assumption 22. It was like around Thanksgiving this lady who Ben was selling he was at the time selling a system called Clover it's like a POS system, point of purchase type system and she was actually looking to get his blessing on a book she was writing that the first three chapters were going to be about him and how he changed her life, and so it was unbelievable. And she then shared how utterly destroyed she was to find out he had passed, you know, just a few months earlier. But she went on to share the beginning of part of her chapter or something like that, and it basically was Ben making the sales call and she didn't want to be bothered. She was hoping he would go away and he didn't go away and apparently got in there and basically she shared how he quickly noticed that she was going through something, that she was having a hard time and I think, especially in a relationship or something. I can't remember all the exact words, but the part that was just really amazing and I'm so proud of and I think you try to do this and it's hard but he really at that point died to himself, put her first and apparently really went on to spend a lot more time with her and lifted her up, you know like, shared a lot of things and must have got her into writing and beautiful writing, I mean. What she did write in there you can tell it was that she should be an author and for sake of time I'll go through the whole.

Speaker 2: 12:57

But that was the essence of it was that he put her first in that moment. Even though he was trying to sell her, she's a little annoyed. And yet he was able to recognize she was struggling and took the time to really be present for her. And then that obviously did something that really changed her and she claimed it completely changed her life and she was doing what she was because of ben. So and it goes hand in hand one other time he said you know, dad, I'm having a because then we sell in that town money saver for a bit, unfortunately during the middle of covid, so that that probably contributed this whole thing.

Speaker 2: 13:27

But um, he, uh. He said you know, I'm having, I was having a really hard time. So I decided tomorrow when I, or yesterday when I went out, I just thought each person I meet I want to lift their day up. I don't care whether I sell anything, whatever happens. He said he had one of the best sales day. So he realized it to the point earlier if you, you know, focus on the relationship and other people, the things you need, the monies, you know, the manna will come. You, quick-witted, funny, good listener. I'm sure this is very common with the bipolar. My daughter is the same way. They're class presidents, homecoming king and queens, life of the party all this going on. Then you've got this struggle over here, this affliction that they've got to deal with.

Speaker 1: 14:20

That's great and I think, especially for myself and going through my mental health journey, that a conversation I had with one of my counselors or therapists and we were just talking about all the different things that I wanted to do and had all these things lined up and and I felt like I was just like all over the place and that there wasn't a method to the madness and um and and my counselor told me he said that if you want to, you know basically corral, that, you know get a get, get a calendar and write those down and scheduling. And so I tried that a little bit and, for whatever reason, I was falling off the horse. But then our conversation quickly turned because I was starting to I think I was are a lot of surgeons and lawyers and very prominent well-to-do people that are doing great things that have some type of a mental health challenge, whether it is that ADHD on to tell him he said would you like to have a surgeon? That their mind is a little bit all over the place but then, when that surgery has happened, is super hyper-focused on that particular surgery or do you want somebody? The opposite.

Speaker 1: 15:56

And he went on to tell me that you know that there's a lot of people that are undiagnosed for whatever reason, and I think that plays a little bit into what you're talking about, ben and your daughter that yeah, there might have been things here and there and the like, but once they actually focused on whatever that thing was, that he rose.

Speaker 1: 16:19

And she rose above that to actually have a greater impact on that person by just being present and not being so wrapped up in in the sale. Uh, so I just wanted to share a little bit about me, and so that made me feel a little bit better when I'm having down days that, okay, nobody, we know, nobody's perfect, but the things that we're doing, we're trying to do the best that we can, and if we just do a little bit at a time and we just kind of continue on the path that we think and through our faith and through our mentors and the people we surround ourselves with, that, that makes things a little bit easier when we get to those tough points Like, oh my gosh, I haven't had a sale in a week or two weeks.

Speaker 1: 17:11

And the next thing, you know, boom, the biggest sale of the career may happen. Right, yeah.

Speaker 2: 17:18

I can't help but have a few thoughts, as you're sharing that, please do. Yeah, I can't help but have a few thoughts, as you're sharing, that Please do. Mother Teresa is a big hero of mine and I think she talks about you know, we don't have to go out and save the world. We just got to help that person next to us and I think our culture is so, and this is one of the things that hurts me the most. With Ben and partly, you know, I would run around the house saying no such thing as best. You can always do better and you got it. You know. Second best is not enough. You have all these motivational things I'm trying to do, but that can also put an incredible mental burden on somebody. If you're not, you know, if you don't have that groundedness in that you're a son, a daughter of Christ. To me, that's your first identity. All this other stuff's kind of second. You know, husband, father, friends, you know things like that. And then that stuff um, we got to eat, we got to pay our bills, so you do got to go out and do that. Um, the the other thing that ties in again, we could talk for hours, so I'm trying to cut short some of my thoughts here, but, uh, I was starting to share with you earlier.

Speaker 2: 18:19

We host this Sober Burning man, and it's an AA group. It's all people recovering addicts and it's my favorite group I'm ever around, even more than church. To be honest with you, I mean and I was thinking I don't know how to best explain it and I thought I think what it is is that we're really called to lean on one another. You know, these people, to me, are so broken. They got so many tragic stories worse than ours, and yet they're standing up, I mean, they're lifted up and they're leaning each other and lifting one another up. And you're, and to your point, when you're feeling that that we, you know oh, I didn't make the sale or you know, you're feeling that insecurity, or that I'm not accomplishing, and I'm around those people, it's's almost like I feel that just that love of Christ, like I don't have to do anything, I can just rest in his arms, just being present, just being, you know, a child of Christ, is all I need to do. And so I think it's all those things you're wrestling, you know, because, trust me, I got to leave here and I'll have something at work I got to deal with and I'll be like praying please, lord, you know, give me the right stuff and we go. You know even the business and we've been really. You know we were half the size we were before COVID and you know, if I could, I'll share.

Speaker 2: 19:33

You know, the biggest thing for me to even stand here and talk about A year ago I couldn't do this because I would be emotional wreck and I think the journey I'm growing on and I think this will relate it's do I really believe? Do I really believe in the resurrection? Do I believe in the conquering of death? Do I believe in eternal life? I'm going to be reunited with Ben and as Catholics we don't have that kind of like oh, I'm saving them there. That was one of the biggest. That's the hardest thing for me and my wife when this happened is is he okay? We just wanted God to come and say he's good, he's with me, sorry, so anyway, okay. So what's happened is over the year and a half. It's like taking a little well, your whole life right.

Speaker 2: 20:27

I think of that story of the beggar on the rich guys I can't remember all the names down from the scripture, but you know he goes to hell and he's like, hey, I've got to warn my brothers. And they're like, if they didn't get it too bad, you know we got Moses, you had all these prophets. If they didn't get it too bad, you know we got Moses, you had all these prophets. So they didn't figure it out and I couldn't help. But I felt this coming on me with the Holy Spirit, like I got all these. The story I just shared with you. I had so many beautiful stories, dreams. You know the Tommy and Zeke, if you ever shared that one dream, they had two independent dreams and the same exact event happened with Ben in the dream.

Speaker 2: 21:00

I, just a couple weeks ago, during the mission trip during Easter, one of my franchisees called me to say, during Father Larry Richard's talk in Calvary which is, if you ever heard it, it's pretty intense it came to him that he had to call me and say that he knew Ben was okay in heaven with God and I was like what, I don't even talk to him. He's one of my 30-some franchise, one of them. He knew Ben was okay in heaven with God and I was like what? I haven't even talked to him in life. He's one of my 30-some franchise, one of them, great guy, and those things you know, especially going right through the Easter season, that we just are, and you know, it's that belief and that faith and I've gotten so much joy now and comfort. And even my spiritual director said you know, ben's okay, he's with God. You're a father, You're a husband, you got a business, you got employees that are depending on you and I've really tried to focus on that, and so we're actually in the middle. I'll share this I don't know if I'm jumping ahead and me and my wife just met with some people yesterday.

Speaker 2: 21:57

Ben loved to work out, he was rolling the fitness and lifting and everything, and so our goal is if the Holy Spirit wants it to be, is what I mostly pray for is to open a gym for recovering addicts in Mansfield and then create a culture around that, or community. I should say that we can do other things. So we think we're real close. I'm trying to get the physical space and we've got few people involved that knew Ben, in fact, his sponsor and the place he was at, the guy there. So we're very and my wife, who's really, you know, just kind of almost become a hermit because it's been hard, you know, to get out and she said if you do, if we do this, I'm going to be there.

Speaker 2: 22:37

And so she went yesterday and she was so lifted up and I think I mean that's I know I'm not saying I'm not a psychologist, but obviously when you're helping others and that's the big thing I started to say earlier the humility and the and you know I didn't to first say that my daughter was mentally ill was one of the most painful things before Ben died, and yet it's been one of the greatest blessings, because now I feel like I get it and I had panic attacks when I was in college and anyway.

Speaker 2: 23:08

So we see the suffering, we see so many worse situations, and so me and my wife have said, man, if there's any way that we could bring somebody else some kind of piece especially, well, and I will tell you this I mean the drug dealer is in prison.

Speaker 2: 23:23

I work with the FBI, but our main goal this is the other big thing is knowing the true enemy. You know, it's not that drug dealer, it's Satan, and we really pray for his soul and the other people that are struggling in this. And I mean he, honestly, he was getting his feet cut off from diabetes. You know, when you do the drugs I've seen it the limb's missing and stuff like that. It's so horrific. So you know, we just feel really blessed, you know, and to have and I guess to go back to my original point, sorry I'm rambling on, but to have that faith and that belief and that, ben's okay, it frees you to go out and then do these, rather than sitting in your own sorrow, which we do get in. I mean, it hits you for sure, but anyway, I'm rambling. I don't know what the original question was.

Speaker 1: 24:10

No, it's great. And to be as transparent about this, it's tough, because no matter how many people try to reduce the stigma, there's still a stigma from people, from organizations out there. So just having this conversation and you sharing that I mean, when you brought up the venture in Mansfield, I just got chills because it's so awesome and so many levels above what somebody might think that we'd be capable of doing. It's like, okay, now if we can do this, we're helping people health-wise and we're giving people a place to hang out and maybe you bring a church element and there's groups. Oh yeah, and to have that is when I say at the beginning and the end of the show, wanting to help three billion people, these crazy goals that we have, that we think that if we don't have those, then we're limiting ourselves and we're only on earth for a finite amount of time. So what do we want to spend our time doing?

Speaker 1: 25:19

And when I had to accept my mental illnesses in plural, that was one of the hardest things. But once, kind of your point, once you do it and you just accept it and say this is just a part of who I am. And yeah, there might be medication I don't want to take it, but maybe that's part of what I need. Maybe talking to a counselor or a priest, Maybe those are things that I need. I need to get over myself and let again. Let somebody else that has the keys to the kingdom really take the wheel.

Speaker 2: 25:56

Yeah, that is awesome. You make me think of a couple of things, and this will relate to business and this One of the first things. You know, I grew up my dad worked in a factory. We came from a pretty meager thing and I'll never forget the numbers aren't going to matter. I remember I just want to make $35,000 a year. That was like my goal or something.

Speaker 2: 26:13

And I'm at this company early on and my buddy goes why don't know? This is the stupidest thing. I'm already done with college and everything. I'm like. I never thought of it.

Speaker 2: 26:24

I guess I'm the only one preventing this from happening. I could do this, I guess, and that changed everything. I started reprogramming my mind, listening to tapes and all this stuff. Well, just your point, it's no different. Now You're doing this, you know, if this gym thing happens, and I think a key thing is having the ultimate humility. I don't really know what I'm doing, but I'm going to go try to do it.

Speaker 2: 26:45

You know what I mean? It's kind of like and we did a Lucas. It's called Lucas Community Center. It's a faith-based community center in Lucas, the town we live. Very similar thing. That's a whole story I can tell you. But it's a faith. It's to bring people together in relationship, and this was before Ben. Even this was more related to the marriages, broken families and the community in that, and bringing virtue, one of the things. I'll jump around a little bit, but these are the key points of this journey. So, having those panic attacks when I was younger, I remember it was horrifying, you know. I remember I thought I was dying when it first happened. So it's one of my personal experiences, I guess, with something close to this. But the one that really hit me and I know it had to be the Holy Spirit could have been.

Speaker 1: 27:26

I don't mean to cut you off. We're getting close on time, so if it's okay with you, we could close this episode and go ahead and film a second episode.

Speaker 1: 27:37

So you're able to share, because I don't want to cut you off from what you're sharing, because it's so important and our viewers and listeners we owe it to them to give the whole story and those experiences. If you want an encore, sure, yeah, absolutely so, yeah. Thank you, our viewers, our listeners, for joining us on this episode of the Voices for Voices TV show and podcast In studio. Our guest, mr Bill Zerzow, has joined us for this part one. Why don't you come back next week and check out part two? So until next time, I'm Justin Allen Hayes, founder and executive director of Voices for Voices, and please be a voice for you or somebody in need.