If you are dating…and it feels like a chore…this episode will change the game for you.
Dating only feels like a chore when you’re not getting what you want.
Tune into this episode to start getting what you want while dating…as soon as today.
Interested in working with me 1:1. Book a sales call HERE to learn more about becoming a private client so that you can become in high-demand in the dating world…
…AND attract emotionally available and financially established men who desire serious commitment so that you can choose your life partner in as early as a year.
If you are dating…and it feels like a chore…this episode will change the game for you.
Dating only feels like a chore when you’re not getting what you want.
Tune into this episode to start getting what you want while dating…as soon as today.
Interested in working with me 1:1. Book a sales call HERE to learn more about becoming a private client so that you can become in high-demand in the dating world…
…AND attract emotionally available and financially established men who desire serious commitment so that you can choose your life partner in as early as a year.
Take a self-paced 6 month journey to do the REAL foundational work to prepare for the love life you desire - Formation
Follow me on Instagram for more dating gems at:
@torahcents
@curved2cuffed
Speaker 1:
What's up, lover girl, welcome back. Hey girl, welcome back to the Date With Sense podcast. This episode is for the girls who are dating, the girls who are putting themselves out there meeting men, whether you're meeting them online, whether you're meeting them outside. However you're meeting them, you are probably talking to them on the phone, you might be having conversations with them, you might be already going on actual dates with them, but it's feeling kind of dusty, meaning it feels draining, it feels like a chore, it feels exhausting. You're just like I mean they in my phone but like why are you texting me? It's kind of like I'm doing it, but I ain't really into it. I mean, I'm enjoying the conversations here and there, I'm enjoying the attention here and there, but I ain't really into it. I mean, I'm enjoying the conversations here and there, I'm enjoying the attention here and there, but I'm not really lit up about it, I'm not excited about it.
Speaker 1:
First thing I'm going to say there's two reasons why this is, and the first reason I'm not really going to go too much in depth on this podcast for that particular reason. But the first reason is you're not dating men on your standards. You're not dating men that are of the quality of men that you want. That's why you don't really care Like, that's why it feels it doesn't feel real good to you, it doesn't feel exciting to you, you're annoyed with their text. And I'm just going to say right here girl, you're wasting your time. So anybody that's in your phone, yeah, let me just help you on today, ma'am. Anybody that's in your phone that you are really not excited about, for whatever reason, because they don't have the traits that you're looking for in a man. They lack a lot of the qualities that you're looking for in a man, but they're good enough to just text or good enough to just talk on the phone, because you like the attention, you like to feel like you're making progress. You ain't making progress, girl. I'll just tell you now the progress is not being made. You are wasting your time. You're wasting your life force.
Speaker 1:
Please I wasn't even going to talk about this on a podcast today, but if you want to make your day life more delicious in 24 hours, please get them out of your phone. Please stop talking to them on your phone. I do not care if it's something that you know distracts you from the troubles of life. It's a waste of time. Please go find somebody who matches your standards. Please find somebody that you don't have to mother. Please find somebody who is the emotionally stable the way you want, the financially stable the way you want, right, men who are doing things in the world. They don't just got pipe dreams. They've actually executed on many of their dreams. These men are very handsome and attractive and they show up for themselves Like they. Please, please, stop what you're doing Again. I didn't even plan to say that.
Speaker 1:
I plan to talk about something else, but that's one of the first reasons why dating feels like a chore is because you're just not dating the standard of men that you want, and it's a waste of your time, girl. The second reason why and that's what we're going to talk about on the podcast today is you're not really enjoying dating. Dating isn't delicious. It's because you're spending way too much time just going through the motions with men, right, just talking on the phone, texting, even going out on dates. You're navigating conversations with them, you're navigating dates with them, but you're not getting what you want.
Speaker 1:
I remember having a client come to a call one time and I'm like, okay, is dating delicious for you? And she said no, and I asked her to talk about why it's not delicious and everything she was saying. I'm like that's because it's centered around these men. Your actions, everything that you're doing, is actually centered around these men. It should be centered around you. It should be centered around your desires and what you want, and you are making it like you're having conversations with men that they want to have and not necessarily what you want to have. Right? You're going on dates that these men want to have and not necessarily what you want to have. You're moving at the pace that these men want to go on, instead of moving at the pace that you want to go on.
Speaker 1:
You are living your dating life based upon what men want, and this is why I always go back to the feminine leads and the masculine serves and supports and executes. Because when you center your dating and relationship journey around the men, this is what happens, and you have to change it. You have to start getting what you want on a regular basis. So here is one thing that I want you to do that will turn things around for you in 24 hours. If you got men in your phone, if you are going on dates with men, if you're talking to men on a regular basis. Right? This is what I want you to do. I want you to reach out to every single one of these men and I want you to express a desire, that's all. Do it now, baby. Do it right now.
Speaker 1:
Send a text, send a voice note, call, do whatever you need to do, but express a desire. Do you want your next date to be at the new exhibit at the Science Museum? Ask for it, express it. Is he texting you good morning Text every day and you're like, oh my gosh, like I just want something different than this. Right? I want you to express that.
Speaker 1:
Instead of a good morning text like, sir, I appreciate you thinking of me, but instead of a good morning text every morning, what I would absolutely love is an interesting question of the day morning. What I would absolutely love is an interesting question of the day. One of the girls that my son is taught like he talked to in the past um, and they were not even dating. It was just like a friendship and every day they would send each other an interesting question of the day and they would just find like they would really just enjoy answering each other's questions. And whenever she wouldn't send a question, or whenever he was late, he'd be like, oh man, she didn't send my question of the day. Or he'd be like man, mom, you know I haven't sent my question of the day to such and such and that's what they both look forward to, because I think it was like a long distance thing, long distance friendship, and they just look forward to those questions. So, instead of a good morning text, what would you be excited about seeing instead? And express it. I don't know.
Speaker 1:
Some people might be like, oh, if he says good morning text every day, then he probably ain't the man you want anyway. And I'm like that's so ridiculous because so many women love good morning text. Like that's so ridiculous because so many women love good morning text, so many women adore good morning text. And to say that a man is not for you or he's not good enough, or he's not a man that can show up for you because he does that, because so many women likes it, it's just ridiculous. You have to be the woman to teach men how to win with you, because he's been winning with good morning text with other women. That's what worked.
Speaker 1:
Those women wanted those things.
Speaker 1:
You have to let him know what you want. Express it. If you've had a really rough week, you know you got a lot of emotions going on and you have a cry that is stuck in between your chest and your back and you really just want to be held. You want your back rubbed so that you can just get all your emotions out. Send the message, call them up, let them know it's what you want, whatever you want, it doesn't have to be any of those things right? Think about what you want from these men and express it. Whether it's flowers, whether it's you do an activity on the next day, whether it's you want to be like if you've built rapport with this man and you would like for him to send you to the spa again, just reach out and just express a desire, and when you do this, you will quickly see which ones are truly interested in meeting your needs and your desires. You'll see very, very quickly and you'll see which ones who may not be the best fit for you. And I'm telling you, this works like a charm.
Speaker 1:
I have my clients do it all the time. I'm like okay, girl, it is time to express a desire, it's time to ask for something. See if these men show up for you. See how fast they show up for you and say, oh, no problem. See how fast they come up with an excuse and you're going to be able to see okay, this man is not a good fit here, because all I asked for us to do on our next date is an activity date and he's talking about I don't know. I don't know about that, sir, we are complete. We are complete, right? Oh, we've been dating for a while. You know. We've been dating for a good amount of time and I want to be able to express myself with this man. I want to be able to cry on his shoulders. Let me find out. I had a client one time. One of her parents died and that's one thing she requested from a man and he showed up for her versus oh man, you know, I really ain't got time for that, or that's not something I'm comfortable with.
Speaker 1:
It don't even matter if it's not something that's aligned with what you want and need. Again, you need to be dating men and talking to men that can fulfill these desires. It doesn't matter about their capacity. It doesn't matter about their capacity. It doesn't matter if I don't care, whatever reason, it doesn't matter, all right. What matters is are these men able to show up in the capacity that would be able to meet your needs? If they can't say nothing more than good morning text, then it's time to complete.
Speaker 1:
If they don't like, if they're not open to taking you to an art museum, let's just say you ask the science museum. Let's just say, hey, you know, I want to go to the new exhibit at the science museum. And it's not like it's a difference between him saying, hey, not this week because I got this going on, let's schedule it for this week. That's different. But let's schedule it for this week, that's different. But if he's just like I'm not, I don't think I want to go to the science museum, I don't like science museums all that much. And then for you, science museums are like a big thing for you. Oh yeah, we need to wrap this on up. We need to complete it today and gauge the man's eagerness. Gauge their eagerness. You will start to see how your dating life can be more delicious in 24 hours, because you'll see all the men who step up for you and then you'll see the men who also need to be cut off. It's just that easy and this simple exercise will help you in draining connections so that you can start dating deliciously.
Speaker 1:
Today, okay, it is the exact process that I be guiding my clients through and, as a coach, I help these high achieving women of faith date with purpose and for pleasure. I help them drop the good girl behaviors that has them settling for less and tolerating the most of each week Just dealing with the same conversations, dealing with the same type of dates, going through the motions with men feeling underwhelmed. Because you don't want to rock the boat, because you don't want to cause conflict, you don't want to seem aggressive or demanding. You want to be a nice girl that doesn't hurt feelings. You want to be a nice girl that can be get along with. Like no, if I'm coaching you, you have to drop it, because I'm going to teach you how to stop centering men. When we work together, you will stop centering men so that you can put yourself on a pedestal.
Speaker 1:
Most of us have been conditioned to put men on a pedestal and to do things to make them happy. Even when you listen to femininity teachings and how to be more feminine, it is catered around what men want. Oh yeah, because men like dresses and men like this kind of hair and men like this kind of voice and men wants you to show up this way. And this is what like. No, no, we don't have to change ourselves just to attract these men. We don't have to behave a certain way.
Speaker 1:
Okay, and I'm going to teach you how to maintain who you are and to be free so you won't think that, oh, I'm too much. I'm too much for these men. They can't handle my quirks, my sense of humor, these men, they can't handle my quirks, my sense of humor. And I'm going to show you exactly how to stop performing for men so that you can move into a state of receiving for them. As long as you are performing for men and needing to appear a certain way, you're not going to be in a position to actually receive from them, because you're always going to be concerned about what they like. Am I tap dancing enough for the men? Am I shucking and jiving enough for the butter biscuits that the men are going to give me Like? No, you have to be your full self. You have to have a certain level of freedom, and my clients that tap into this level of freedom attract the men that can fully accept them there and honor and respect them there and want to provide, protect and build for them.
Speaker 1:
As that woman, and working with me, you'll use my desire and delight method to uncover exactly what you truly want to experience while dating and how to get it, even if you have struggled getting what you want from the past, even though men have made you feel like you couldn't have it in the past for whatever reason right, if they made you feel like you were asking for too much, I'll show you how you can get it, even if you felt stuck or frustrated in the past, and you'll also use my signature voice approach to express your desires to dates in a way that you get what you want without sounding demanding and aggressive. Okay, so that you're able to speak to your desires clearly and confidently, so that you know exactly what to say to men. And you can do this even if you have trouble being vulnerable, even if you have fear around how men may react to your request. You will know how to stand up for yourself and request. You will know how to get what you want on a daily basis, a weekly basis, a monthly basis, and not be pressed about one man fulfilling it for you, because you'll just know how to get it fulfilled, just in general.
Speaker 1:
And this is where dating stops feeling like a chore. When you show up in dating and get what you want, it stops feeling like a chore. When you start feeling adored and taken care of and you feel like men are looking to please you, dating stops feeling like a chore and it becomes very enjoyable, very exciting, it becomes deeply satisfying, and that's what I want for you. So that's what I want for you to do, queen. I want you to do that exercise. Send out the message, call a guy, think of the desire that you want to express, and express it and see which ones are not available for it, see which ones are right, and then make your choice. Then, I promise you, dating will become more delicious to you. Once you do this exercise and make the choice, complete certain connections, delete certain connections and continue others.
Speaker 1:
Now, if you are looking to become a woman that will express her desires confidently and attract men who want to fulfill these desires multiple men who want to have these desires go ahead and book a sales call. Book a sales call to work with me. I have helped women achieve some life-changing things from them just being able to have the freedom to be themselves and ask men for what they want, and they started attracting men who gave them the desires of their hearts. Okay, gave them the desires of their heart. So if you're looking for that and you want to date multiple men who will do that for you, go ahead and book a sales call. You can book it at the link in the show notes or you can go to my Instagram bio and book a call from there. If you can't find the link in the show notes, for whatever reason, wherever you're listening to, you can just go to my Instagram and book a call there.
Speaker 1:
I would love to have a conversation with you to see how we can help you do this. I don't care if you think you're too plus size. I don't think if you care, I mean, I don't care if you think that you're too old, you're too late. I don't care about any of that, because I've helped all types of clients in all different situations, from single moms to plus size women, right To women who were older, in their fifties and their sixties. I helped them all achieve exactly what I'm talking about. So if you want to be a part of that and you want to do that this year, go ahead and book this call with me, book a sales call and we'll talk about what it looks like to work together and a step-by-step plan that I would give you and work with you for you to have what you want. So all right, lady, if you liked this episode, go ahead and five stars it and leave a review so that we can be found in the algorithm. And until next time, bye.