#21: Dove Complications

While Teloopa and Enelcia catch Sir JP the Dragon up on recent events, Nazzy struggles to keep time-displaced children out of the cross fire between the Mist People and the Big Fish of the future.

Written and Produced by Jennifer Lott

Voice Actors:
Shannon Rea as Nazzy
Tegan Lott as Teloopa
Nicole Stoner as Enelcia
Jennifer Lott as King David
Lynda Williams as Queen Augusta
Owen Lott as Wenoburt
Ivy Lott as Child Yemilina
Kenzie Stoner as Rose

Transcript

EXT – SKY – RIDING PEGASUS

SOUND: Opening theme music

SOUND: Light wind

SOUND: Pegasus flying

ENELCIA

We’re absolutely one hundred percent sure…that dragon is Sir JP, right? 

SOUND: Dragon flying

SOUND: Dragon fire belch

TELOOPA

True dragons never attack each other. We’ve seen him kill one. And they don’t eat sheep. We just saw him do that, too.

ENELCIA

That’s true. Real dragons hate sheep. Plus, Mijar sure talked to that dragon like it really was…Sir…but…I don’t like being this close to a dragon – a dragon-on-the-outside-dragon – whatever! It’s freaky!

TELOOPA

It’s Sir JP in there. I promise. We have to tell him the princess is a dove.

ENELCIA

I know, I know. I will be chill...hopefully.

SOUND: Dove cooing

TELOOPA

You don’t need to squawk so much, princess. We’re flying as fast as we can.

SOUND: Sharp dragon wing flaps

SOUND: Dragon roaring

SOUND: Dove cooing

ENELCIA

Hey! Whoa…umm…nice dragon…are you?

SOUND: Dragon groan

ENELCIA

I’m sorry. I’m not saying it right.

TELOOPA

How about you nod your head if you’re really Sir JP in a dragon’s body?

SOUND: Dragon flying

ENELCIA

Was that a nod? Uh, your neck is so long…and the wind is…were you going for a dive?

TELOOPA

Roll your eyes like you’re just exasperated and you’re not going to eat us.

SOUND: Dragon snorts

TELOOPA

Okay, that worked.

ENELCIA

Oh, you poor man! Trapped as one of the monsters you slay. 

SOUND: Dragon groan

ENELCIA

Brilliant move — slaying that dragon at the ceremony with your teeth. Don’t worry. Teloopa will set you right, won’t you?

TELOOPA

Probably.

ENELCIA

What? He’s organic. You can just change him back, can’t you?

TELOOPA

It’s not that simple. It’s frogs I can switch back and forth in my sleep. A dragon would be effort. Possibly research. And I only have five spells left, remember?

ENELCIA

So you’ll make an effort and do research, and use one of your last spells to change him back into a knight!

TELOOPA

Yeah, it’s on my To Do List. So, here’s the thing, Sir JP, I had to turn your girlfriend into a dove. This is her, see?

SOUND: Dove cooing

SOUND: Dragon growls

TELOOPA

It’s for her own protection. Mijar set a pack of wolf assassins on her.

SOUND: Dove cooing

SOUND: Dove flapping

SOUND: Dragon soft growl

SOUND: Dragon flying away

TELOOPA

Oh, just going to ride off on your dragon-man, now, huh? I guess that works, too. My little dove wings are wearing out on you, right? I get it. Not offended.

ENELCIA

Aww, Teloopa, if you had a dangerous flying boyfriend, I’m sure he’d carry you around on his back, too.

TELOOPA

(disgusted noise)

I’m not jealous. My boyfriends are way cuter than him. They have big, gooey eyes and smooth, green bodies. They’re adorable.

ENELCIA

You did what?

TELOOPA

I’ve said too much.

SOUND: Pegasus flying

ENELCIA

Say more! I’m sure the cave people want to hear about your personal life.

TELOOPA

No, they don’t. They want to hear about Nazzy and her latest victim of time-napping.

ENELCIA

I want to hear about your green boyfriends.

TELOOPA

I will knock this vivicord off the Pegasus.

SOUND: Vivicord yelp

ENELCIA

Shh, she’s bluffing. You’re safe. So…do you still keep them around? Do you know which frogs are really your—

TELOOPA

Insert Nazzy here. Nazzy, you better be recording yourself!
 

EXT – TINY ISLAND ON THE OCEAN

SOUND: Ocean waves

SOUND: Pearl ropes tightening

CHILD YEMILINA

(screaming)

KING DAVID

Let her go!

SOUND: Frenzied ghost flying

SOUND: Air clashes

SOUND: Mist People ambiance

MIST PEOPLE

Stop hurting.

KING DAVID

Not until you let her go!

SOUND: Frenzied ghost flying

SOUND: Air clashes

MIST PEOPLE

Ghost fading.

KING DAVID

I’ll be back to hit you harder! Longer next time!

SOUND: Time travel ending

NAZZY

It’s okay, Your Majesty. I’ve brought a new solid child, so the Mist People will let Little Yemmy go.

KING DAVID

(fade out)

You said you wouldn’t fetch another child…

SOUND: Ghost disappearing

NAZZY

I know, but this has gone on long enough.

SOUND: Fish tails slapping

SOUND: Sea monster roaring

SOUND: Mist People ambiance

NAZZY

You’re lucky I’m too impatient to wait for the ‘bad fish’ to drag you down. They could, you know. The King battered you so badly that you’re drifting low over the…well, what used to look like the ocean.

WENOBURT

It is an ocean. The funny cloud people are drifting so close, they’re getting wet. 

MIST PEOPLE

Blinded. Tornadoes.

NAZZY

They can’t see the ocean, Wenoburt. But don’t help them just yet.

MIST PEOPLE

Help us.

NAZZY

First things first.

SOUND: Ocean waves

CHILD YEMILINA

(crying)

SOUND: Mist people swooping

SOUND: Pearl ropes breaking

SOUND: Body fall on rock

CHILD YEMILINA

(grunt)

SOUND: Footsteps on rock

SOUND: Boat creaking

SOUND: Rowing

SOUND: Water lapping

NAZZY

Come to the boat, Little Yemmy. If they try anything again, I’ll take Wenoburt and you straight back to the past.

SOUND: Kitten mew

CHILD YEMILINA

My kitty!

SOUND: Running child

CHILD YEMILINA

Kitten, those rocks are too wobbly. Get off them quick!

SOUND: Kitten mew

SOUND: Shifting rocks

NAZZY

Your kitten will climb down soon. I’ll drop my anchor, so she can get in the boat when she’s ready.

CHILD YEMILINA

She won’t make it to the boat. She’s stuck!

SOUND: Kitten mew

NAZZY

Uh…okay. Just stay there. We’ll come ashore.

SOUND: Rowing

SOUND: Water lapping

SOUND: Boat rocking

SOUND: Hand splashing in water

NAZZY

Ah! Wenoburt, I can’t find the island. Can you reach out with this oar and touch it?

WENOBURT

It’s right here, silly!

SOUND: Wood hitting rock

NAZZY

It all looks like tornadoes to me.

WENOBURT

Listen. I’m not hitting air.

SOUND: Wood hitting rock

NAZZY

Okay. Out we go…onto…more tornados.

SOUND: Anchor dropping

SOUND: Boat rocking

SOUND: Footsteps on rock

NAZZY

(talking to self)

Not tornados, just rocks, they’re just rocks…

SOUND: Mist People Ambiance

MIST PEOPLE

Bring computer.

NAZZY

Not until I have both kids close enough to time travel with me.

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on rock

CHILD YEMILINA

And my kitty!

NAZZY

And the kitty.

MIST PEOPLE

Reset trust.

NAZZY

I’m not a computer. You have to earn my trust.

WENOBURT

Those cloud people look really scared.

SOUND: Mist People Ambiance

NAZZY

You can help them now…if they behave themselves.

SOUND: Footsteps stop

SOUND: Hand grab

CHILD YEMILINA

I don’t want to go to the boat without kitten.

NAZZY

Just a few steps closer, Little Yemmy, so we can reach the computer. Come on.

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps

SOUND: Mist People ambiance

MIST PEOPLE

Find lever.

WENOBURT

What lever are you talking about?

MIST PEOPLE

Red lever.

WENOBURT

There’s lots of red levers. Should I pull them all?

MIST PEOPLE

Bumpy lever.

WENOBURT

They’re all bumpy. They’re covered in pearls.

MIST PEOPLE

Smooth lever.

WENOBURT

But you said it was bumpy.

MIST PEOPLE

Red lever.

NAZZY

Okay, drop the word ‘lever.’ We know the noun. Skip it, so you can use another word to direct him.

MIST PEOPLE

Smooth red.

WENOBURT

Oh, the red part is smooth. It must be this one.

SOUND: Lever movement

SOUND: Monster body slams on water

WENOBURT

(scream)

NAZZY and CHILD YEMILINA

Wenoburt!

SOUND: Roaring and gurgling

SOUND: Monster fish chomps

SOUND: Fish tails slapping

CHILD YEMILINA

Wenoburt, those fish are going to eat you! Be careful!

SOUND: Sword swipes

WENOBURT

Hi-ya! Hi-ya! Hi-ya!

SOUND: Monster fish chomps

SOUND: Sword falling in water

WENOBURT

My sword!

NAZZY

No! Let it sink. I’ll get you a new one.

SOUND: Body grab

NAZZY

I’ve got you.

SOUND: Water dripping off clothes

SOUND: Climbing wet rocks

NAZZY

(grunt of exertion)

You’re a bit heavier now that you’re magically heightened. Oof!

SOUND: Body thump on rocks

SOUND: Mist People ambiance

MIST PEOPLE

Get computer!

SOUND: Fish tails slapping

SOUND: Monster fish chomps

NAZZY

Okay, look, I’ve endangered two children with the lot of you. The Mist People punished Yemmy for helping the Big Fish and now the Big Fish are punishing Wenoburt for helping the Mist People. If you can’t keep your wispy and scaly limbs off the children, we do nothing for you! I have them both in my reach, and we can vanish in an instant.

CHILD YEMILINA

But you’re not touching my kitty!

NAZZY

(sigh)

I’ll stretch myself out, okay?

CHILD YEMILINA

How? Do you do yoga stretches? Or gymnastics?

NAZZY

I’m very stretchy! Just relax about the cat.

SOUND: Ghost appearing

SOUND: Frenzied ghost flying

CHILD YEMILINA

Daddy’s back!

KING DAVID

You, you, you…!

MIST PEOPLE

Princess free!

KING DAVID

You are not forgiven.

CHILD YEMILINA

I’m okay, daddy. Help me save my kitten!

SOUND: Kitten mew

SOUND: Shifting rocks

SOUND: Ghost flying

KING DAVID

Oh, no! Come down here, you rascally furball. Big jump now. Come on.

CHILD YEMILINA

Be her cat toy, daddy. She wants to play with you.

KING DAVID

Here, kitty, kitty, kitty…

SOUND: Pulsing ghost

KING DAVID

I am a glowing ball of translucent light. Catch me in your paws…down we go…

SOUND: Kitten yowls

SOUND: Claws on rocks

SOUND: Shifting rocks

WENOBURT

I didn’t know you could glow.

KING DAVID

I can when my angel smiles.

SOUND: Kitten lands

CHILD YEMILINA

Daddy, daddy, daddy, I love you!

KING DAVID

There you are, darling.

CHILD YEMILINA

Kitty!

SOUND: Kitten squishing in hug

SOUND: Kitten whining

WENOBURT

You’re squeezing her too tight.

CHILD YEMILINA

I’m never letting her go.

SOUND: Kisses

SOUND: Kitten purring

WENOBURT

Don’t smother her with kisses. You kiss too much.

CHILD YEMILINA

It’s my job.

WENOBURT

When you’re bigger, you kiss a grumpy knight.

CHILD YEMILINA

Eww, only babies and kittens get my kisses.

SOUND: Ghost flying

KING DAVID

That’s right, my angel. No kissing that grumpy knight – you’re too sweet for him. Although, I suppose I would miss my grandchildren if you never got together with him.

NAZZY

Perhaps we shouldn’t mention Little Yemmy’s adult life in front of her. It might change her choices.

KING DAVID

I’ll whisper it to you.

SOUND: Ghost flying

KING DAVID

My first grandchild was born with feather-patterned skin. Traces of bird DNA. Perhaps you can at least ensure that Yemilina takes better care of herself during her first pregnancy?

NAZZY

Feather-skin must have been a spell cast on the baby after the birth. Your Majesty, I don’t think DNA can be altered through any careless act in preg—

KING DAVID

Bird genes! Ask any of my descendants. It’s true!

NAZZY

Oookay. I guess time will tell.

SOUND: Virtual reality lever

SOUND: Crashing waves

WENOBURT

There. I pulled the ‘off’ lever. Now everything looks normal.

MIST PEOPLE

Wrong lever.

NAZZY

I think the lever they wanted you to pull would have put the big fish back in a desert illusion.

WENOBURT

Now the fish don’t have to be scared of dry ground, and the cloud things don’t have to be scared of tornadoes. I think we should keep the computer off.

NAZZY

Very wise, Wenoburt.

SOUND: Mist People ambiance

MIST PEOPLE

Done children.

NAZZY

Yes, they’re pesky once they have ideas of their own, aren’t they? We’ll go. We’ll just take this virtual warfare machine with us, shall we?

SOUND: Picking up computer

MIST PEOPLE

Leave computer!

SOUND: Time travel begins

KING DAVID

Time meddler, if I may…

SOUND: Time travel stops

NAZZY

What?

KING DAVID

The opportunity to end this feud may never arise again. If you keep the children close, you could surely talk to these…monsters…a little longer?

NAZZY

Can’t you mediate? You exist forever. You have way more free time.

KING DAVID

I am tainted by the memory of my little girl bound in pearl ropes. I will side with the fish. It is only you who can address both species with a pure heart, understanding that there may be generations of innocents caught in the wake of bad choices that individuals on either side once made. With your impartial vision, there may be peace in this time.

NAZZY

Lofty goal. What do you think, guys?

CHILD YEMILINA

I want peace.

SOUND: Kitten mews

CHILD YEMILINA

My kitty wants peace, too.

SOUND: Thrashing fish

WENOBURT

Can I ride the giant fish if they turn into good fish? Please?

SOUND: Mist People ambiance

MIST PEOPLE

Bad fish.

SOUND: Roaring and gurgling

NAZZY

(sigh)

I guess we’ll settle in for peace talks.

SOUND: Ghost flying

KING DAVID

A noble decision. They couldn’t ask for a better diplomat.

NAZZY

I don’t know about that.

KING DAVID

I’ve known you longer than you’ve known yourself. I remember your keen negotiation skills.

NAZZY

You also said that your first grandchild had bird DNA. No offense, Your Majesty, but I think hanging around as long as you have is fogging up your memory.

 

EXT – ENCHANTED FOREST

SOUND: Forest Ambiance

SOUND: Dragon roaring

SOUND: Dragon flying

SOUND: Wind of falling bodies

TELOOPA and ENELCIA

(screaming)

SOUND: Vivicord crash yelp

SOUND: Body slams into foliage

SOUND: Dragon flying

SOUND: Dragon roaring

SOUND: Foliage rustling

TELOOPA

There it is! Run for it!

SOUND: Running through foliage

SOUND: Vivicord running

SOUND: Wooden door opening

SOUND: Wooden door slamming

SOUND: Footsteps on wooden floor

ENELCIA

Are you sure Nazzy’s house is safe?

TELOOPA

Best dragon defense shield in the kingdom. Mijar enchanted it back when he was a loyal servant.

SOUND: Rattling walls

SOUND: Dragon breathes fire

SOUND: Fire magically extinguished

TELOOPA

See? No fire can penetrate it. It’s teeth proof, claw proof—

ENELCIA

But the Queen hates Nazzy.

TELOOPA

Not back then. She ordered Mijar to do anything the princess wanted. This is Yemilina’s doing.

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on broken glass

ENELCIA

Yikes! Wish Nazzy’s house was vandal-proof. There’s broken glass everywhere.

TELOOPA

Tread carefully. I didn’t get to frog the vandal, so for all I know she’s already adding to the mess every day.

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on broken glass

SOUND: Time travel

NAZZY

Oops. Wrong present. I remember all this glass.

SOUND: Footsteps on broken glass

NAZZY

Which glass attack was this? Oh well…I think there’s still a safe cupboard space somewhere.

SOUND: Footsteps on broken glass

SOUND: Cupboard opening

ENELCIA

Nazzy! Where’s Wenoburt? What have you done?

NAZZY

Whoa, hi! Uh, he’s not with me. That was a while ago. All sorted out now. Oh, and I better stop the recording here. The cave people have heard this part before.

ENELCIA

No, they haven’t! They heard you took Wenoburt! You can’t just stand there and—

NAZZY

Goodbye, fair listeners! Wish us luck!

ENELCIA

Keep recording, vivicord!

TELOOPA

She’s future Nazzy.

ENELCIA

Arrh, I hate that! It’s confusing!

NAZZY

Confusing is my middle name. Why are you even here?

TELOOPA

There’s a dragon outside.

NAZZY

I do have good walls for that.

ENELCIA

How future are you?

NAZZY

I’m trying to remember. Uh…how far along is she?

ENELCIA

What? Who?

NAZZY

Yemilina. I hope I didn’t drop her off in the wrong time.

ENELCIA

A time…too far along?

NAZZY

Well, it’s one way to measure when I am. Is she three months in or is it more?

ENELCIA

Three months into what? What are you talking about?

NAZZY

I’m that early?

TELOOPA

What’s all that stuff you’ve brought?

NAZZY

Souvenirs from cave people future. Look, an artificial vivicord – they call it a microphone.

SOUND: Microphone movement

NAZZY

This is a Jack in the Box.

SOUND: Jack in the Box springing

NAZZY

And this is a toy robot.

SOUND: Toy Robot motor

NAZZY

They’re toys future children enjoy for a few hours and then lose in ‘junk piles’ in a basement.

SOUND: Knocking on window

SOUND: Footsteps on broken glass

SOUND: Opening window

SOUND: Forest ambiance

SOUND: Fairy arrival

SOUND: Fairy wings

SOUND: Closing window

ROSE

The dragon is gone. You better make a run for it.

NAZZY

I better check on the princess.

SOUND: Time travel

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on broken glass

SOUND: Door opening and closing

SOUND: Forest ambiance

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps running in forest

SOUND: Horse galloping

SOUND: Fairy wings

ROSE

Look, the Queen found us. I’ve never seen her on an ordinary horse before.

SOUND: Horse galloping

SOUND: Horse stopping

SOUND: Horse snorting

SOUND: Saddle movement

QUEEN AUGUSTA

First you steal my Pegasus, then you abandon her! I saw the poor thing flying for a cave, three dragons in pursuit!

ENELCIA

We didn’t abandon your Pegasus. She dropped us. She had a nose for danger. Nerves of spaghetti. She didn’t ruffle a feather when we brought her to Sir JP the Dragon. But as soon as the true dragons started roaring at her, she got all jittery. Wouldn’t fly right.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

She’s always in safe skies when I ride her. She hasn’t developed her nerves for dragon attacks.

SOUND: Horse neighing

QUEEN AUGUSTA

This horse, on the other hand, takes dragons in stride. I jumped on his back right after his rider was eaten, and he galloped away with me.

SOUND: Horse whining

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Wait a moment…did you say Sir JP is a dragon?

TELOOPA

You were a bit distracted when we found out. How did you get away from that cursed pot of gold?

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Cursed? It was stolen from me while I was dancing for joy, celebrating my winning streak. One more rub would have filled it completely. Do you mean that the pot is cursed to be stolen?

TELOOPA

Sure. That’ll fit in your brain. Go with it.

ENELCIA

Well, since the princess is safe for now, we should—

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Safe where? Where has she flown?

TELOOPA

Wherever Sir JP is flying. She’s with him.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

But he’s a dragon!

ENELCIA

He’s not a real dragon. We tested.

TELOOPA

There’s something else, though. Something Nazzy said.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

You’ve seen the Time Klutz?

TELOOPA

Just briefly, but she was from the future. She asked about Yemilina. ‘How far along is she?’ ‘Is she three months in or is it more?’

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Was that all she said?

ENELCIA

Something like that.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Tell me where the Klutz went, and I’ll beat more information out of—

TELOOPA

Oh! Oh…dragon dung.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

What’s the matter?

TELOOPA

The princess is pregnant.

QUEEN AUGUSTA, ENELCIA and ROSE

(gasp)

QUEEN AUGUSTA

What?

TELOOPA

Growing thing inside her womb. Your first grandchild.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

But…but she’s a dove!

TELOOPA

Yeah, I’m wondering what that did.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

What do you mean?

TELOOPA

Well, I didn’t adjust my transformation spell for two people. I think I may have left a human embryo inside that tiny dove belly.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

How can that be? A human growing inside a bird! My poor grandbaby will be squished! My daughter will explode!

TELOOPA

Nazzy thought we already knew. She didn’t know what time she was in.

ENELCIA

But…that must mean the pregnancy goes on. It doesn’t end in Yemilina exploding.

TELOOPA

Maybe that’s because of something we do. Maybe we have a narrow window of opportunity here to catch up and expand her? You know, before the baby bursts her guts?

SOUND: Distant sap bugs buzzing

ENELCIA

Use your search spell. Use it up. We have to find her!

ROSE

Hurry!

TELOOPA

Where’s my staff?

QUEEN AUGUSTA

You really should keep a tighter hold on that thing.

TELOOPA

I’ll find it. Give me a second…whoa…

SOUND: Sap bugs buzzing

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Not those again. No! We had that problem fixed, didn’t we?

TELOOPA

Hundreds of frogs are now wolves—

ENELCIA

Hundreds? You’ve turned that many people into—

TELOOPA

That means thousands of Sap Bugs are not getting eaten. The frogs keep them under control.

SOUND: Sap bugs buzzing

ENELCIA

What about ordinary frogs? Aren’t there enough actual frogs to—

TELOOPA

Obviously not.

SOUND: Fairy wings

ROSE

I found your staff.

TELOOPA

Thanks.

SOUND: Hand clasping staff

SOUND: Sap bugs buzzing

ENELCIA

Oh no! We’re about to become crazy-happy and forget all about the princess, aren’t we? How did Sir JP resist Sap Bugs? He never got sappy. If we do what he did…

TELOOPA

He didn’t do anything. He was naturally immune.

ENELCIA

Then we better ruuun!

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps

TELOOPA

(annoyed)

Stop it! We’re teleporting. Hold my hand.

ENELCIA

But you only have five spells.

TELOOPA

Spell number one: teleport!

SOUND: Teleportation spell

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on wooden floor

SOUND: Windows rattling in wind

SOUND: Muffled sap bugs buzzing

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Why have you brought us into your own cluttered little hovel, Sorceress? Why not take shelter in my summer house?

TELOOPA

There are still some natural amphibians in my neck of the woods. It’s the best we’re going to get.

ROSE

I still hear sap bugs outside.

TELOOPA

So don’t open a window.

ROSE

It’s windy. What if windows blow open?

TELOOPA

Latch my windows. Good job for you.

SOUND: Fairy wings

SOUND: Window latches closing

TELOOPA

Okay, four spells left. One: locate the princess. Two: teleport to her. Three: freeze any wolves who attack her – because I might need her on the ground for targeting. Four: change her back into a pregnant human.

ENELCIA

What about Sir JP?

TELOOPA

Right, none left for him. Umm…well, he is killing dragons just fine as he is, and he already made a baby. I’d say he’s, uh, had good enough human time.

ENELCIA

Teloopa!

TELOOPA

What? I loved being a mermaid. And you still have a frog baby.

ENELCIA

(anxious)

You can still make a transformation potion for her someday, can’t you?

SOUND: frog croak

TELOOPA

Mmm…make it? Yes. Make it magic? Mmm…

ENELCIA

Is that no? Do I need a new witch friend?

TELOOPA

Gee, I don’t know. Will I get a new elf who isn’t so needy?

ENELCIA

(offended noise)

SOUND: Latch breaking

SOUND: Rush of wind

SOUND: Window banging open

TELOOPA, ENELCIA and QUEEN AUGUSTA

Rose, the window!

SOUND: Fairy wings

ROSE

The latch broke. It won’t close.

SOUND: Sap bugs buzzing

SOUND: Multiple sap bug bites

TELOOPA, ENELCIA, QUEEN AUGUSTA and ROSE

(giggling)

ROSE

I feel like flying in cartwheels. Wheeeeeee! Look at me!

SOUND: Fairy wings

SOUND: Air whipping movement

ENELCIA

I can’t believe the princess is gonna have a baby! It makes me so bouncy.

TELOOPA

Oh, go jump on my couch. Get those bounces out. I’ll get us champagne.

SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on wooden floor 

SOUND: Jumping on couch

SOUND: Bottle uncorked

SOUND: Pouring champagne

TELOOPA

Let’s toast to the new baby!

SOUND: Clinking glasses

QUEEN AUGUSTA

You’re all invited to a bigger party at my house! My daughter…the mother-to-be…must be showered with baby gifts.

TELOOPA

Ooo, ooo, I have some magic left. I’ll conjure the cutest little shirt. It’ll fit any newborn boy or girl. And it’s gonna make you say ‘awwww…’ Watch this!

SOUND: Magic staff

SOUND: Conjuring spell

SOUND: Rustling cloth

ENELCIA, QUEEN AUGUSTA and ROSE

Awwwwww…

ROSE

It needs cute little pants to go with it.

TELOOPA

I can do that. Check it out.

SOUND: Magic staff

SOUND: Conjuring spell

SOUND: Rustling cloth

ENELCIA

Those are the cutest pants ever!

TELOOPA

I know right? Now for itty bitty socks.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

No, no, no, little booties! Conjure warm, fluffy booties.

TELOOPA

Yes, that is better. Conjuring the cutest booties you’ve ever seen in your immortal life.

SOUND: Magic staff

SOUND: Conjuring spell

SOUND: Rustling cloth

ENELCIA

Ohhhh! I want to hug them so much and there’s not even a baby in them yet!

TELOOPA, ENELCIA, QUEEN AUGUSTA and ROSE

(giggling)

TELOOPA

Why were we worried before? I feel like we had a reason.

QUEEN AUGUSTA

It was, uh…something to do with my daughter’s pregnancy…I think.

ENELCIA

That can’t be it. That’s happy news.

TELOOPA

Something about…small? Too small?

ROSE

The princess is too small?

ENELCIA

Oh, oh, I know! She’s going to have one of those tiny baby bumps tucked neatly under her dress, instead of getting fat all over her body. I’m so happy for her!

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Yes, indeed! She’ll strike envy in the hearts of swollen, bloated peasant mothers. An elegant baby bump for an elegant princess!

TELOOPA

Hey, babies need toys! I’m conjuring a rattle.

SOUND: Magic staff

SOUND: Conjuring spell

SOUND: Shaking baby rattle

ENELCIA

That is the cutest rattle! It matches the outfit.

ROSE

The outfit needs a hat.

TELOOPA

Coming right up.

SOUND: Magic staff

SOUND: Air pressure burst

TELOOPA

Oh no, you guys…

QUEEN AUGUSTA

What is it, Sorceress?

TELOOPA

I used up all my spells.

ENELCIA, QUEEN AUGUSTA and ROSE

(groans)

ROSE

What about the hat?

QUEEN AUGUSTA

How could you be so careless? That outfit won’t look right without a hat.

ROSE

The baby will get cold ears.

TELOOPA

Wait, wait, wait, everyone, calm down. Calm down. Lemme check this…

SOUND: Cloth rustling

TELOOPA

We’re okay! The shirt has a hood.

ENELCIA, QUEEN AUGUSTA and ROSE

(sighs of relief)

TELOOPA

Cute little bunny ears on it, see? Look how cute!

ROSE

Aww, it’s perfect!

QUEEN AUGUSTA

Adorable! You don’t need spells anymore.

TELOOPA, ENELCIA, QUEEN AUGUSTA and ROSE

(giggling)

SOUND: Vivicord

ENELCIA

(laughing)

Whoops, cave people! Forgot to say goodbye. Goodbye, wonderful listeners! Wish us a happy baby shower!

TELOOPA, ENELCIA, QUEEN AUGUSTA and ROSE

(cheering)

SOUND: Glasses clinking

SOUND: Wind blowing

SOUND: Windows rattling

SOUND: Sap bugs buzzing

SOUND: Closing theme music