Left two days ahead of Enelcia's intervention, Yemilina learns that Wenoburt is suffering from magical brainwashing and takes a trip to the Community Dungeons to lock up the evil object responsible.
Written and Produced by Jennifer Lott
Voice Actors:
Shannon Rea as Nazzy
Jennifer Lott as Yemilina
Owen Lott as Wenoburt
Jennifer Lott as King David
Jamie Oates as Mijar
Left two days ahead of Enelcia's intervention, Yemilina learns that Wenoburt is suffering from magical brainwashing and takes a trip to the Community Dungeons to lock up the evil object responsible.
Written and Produced by Jennifer Lott
Voice Actors:
Shannon Rea as Nazzy
Jennifer Lott as Yemilina
Owen Lott as Wenoburt
Jennifer Lott as King David
Jamie Oates as Mijar
SOUND: Opening theme music
EXT – MARKETPLACE
SOUND: Marketplace ambiance
SOUND: Vivicord
YEMILINA
Another vivicord? Hmm. I suppose whatever Nazzy’s vivicord is recording, the cave people can hear what I’m doing, too. I hope, dear listeners, that you can somehow enjoy me moping here on these cobblestones while busy peasants hurry to and fro with their more meaningful lives. It’s all you’re going to get.
SOUND: Wolf-banishing drum
WENOBURT
Why do you keep playing that weird drum? It’s not even a song.
YEMILINA
It’s a magic drum. It keeps wolves away.
WENOBURT
Wolves? Where?
SOUND: Sword unsheathed
YEMILINA
There’s no need to pull out your sword. This drum keeps them away, I said.
WENOBURT
Wolves are fast. I have to be ready.
SOUND: Shuffling feet
SOUND: Sword swipe
YEMILINA
Don’t twitch so. You’re awfully tense.
SOUND: Squawking chickens
WENOBURT
Can I have a magic drum to keep these chickens away? They’re still trying to eat my coins.
SOUND: Scooping up coins
YEMILINA
Why do you need those coins, Wenoburt? Doesn’t Nazzy make sure you have enough new clothes – longer leggings to accommodate those abruptly longer legs of yours? Or are you staying with the elves? Someone feeds you, don’t they? You’re not secretly earning gold as a chimney sweep?
WENOBURT
This is the queen’s gold. I’m here to buy things for her.
YEMILINA
What?
WENOBURT
There must be a counter-spell I can buy. Or a magic hammer. I will smash invisible walls and free her from the maze!
YEMILINA
Wenoburt, no! What’s wrong with you?
WENOBURT
The queen is trapped!
YEMILINA
But why do you care? She deserves it.
WENOBURT
You’re the traitor to the crown! Hi-ya!
SOUND: Sword swipes
YEMILINA
(gasp)
SOUND: Body jumping aside
SOUND: Sword hits wood
SOUND: Muttering crowd
SOUND: Dragon wings approaching
SOUND: Panicking crowd
WENOBURT
(improv: panicking about a dragon)
YEMILINA
He’s my boyfriend! It’s offensive that you haven’t memorized the look of him by now. He’s not so indistinctive.
SOUND: Dragon groan
SOUND: Dragon wings retreating
YEMILINA
It’s alright, My Love, the crowd will calm down in a minute.
SOUND: Sword swipes
YEMILINA
(shriek)
SOUND: Dodging movements
YEMILINA
Wenoburt, on the other hand, seems a bit, uh, insane. I’m sure it’s temporary. Stop it!
SOUND: Sword swipes
SOUND: Dodging movements
SOUND: Muttering crowd
WENOBURT
Glory to the queen!
YEMILINA
Glory…? Oh, dragon dung! That flag! Has anyone seen a royal flag waving around? Nasty curse on it that affects time-displaced people?
SOUND: Overlapping “Over there!”
SOUND: Sword hit on wood
YEMILINA
(shriek)
Hold on, Wenoburt! Just wait. Let me do one little thing…
SOUND: Running footsteps on dirt
SOUND: Running footsteps on rock
SOUND: Magic flag waving
YEMILINA
Who’s here? Who’s waving it? Show yourself!
SOUND: Flag dropped
SOUND: Retreating footsteps
YEMILINA
Coward! Whoever it was is gone.
SOUND: Flag lifted
YEMILINA
My Love? Are you still up there somewhere?
SOUND: Dragon wings approaching
SOUND: Soft dragon roar
YEMILINA
Burn this flag for me, please.
SOUND: Approaching footsteps
SOUND: Flag dropped
SOUND: Retreating footsteps
SOUND: Dragon fire
SOUND: Approaching footsteps
YEMILINA
Fire proof? Really? Even dragon fire?
SOUND: Dragon groan
SOUND: Flag lifted
YEMILINA
That’s alright. If I can’t destroy it, I’ll lock it up.
SOUND: Running footsteps
WENOBURT
(panting)
Where are you going, traitor? Get back here!
SOUND: Sword swipe
SOUND: Overlapping running footsteps
WENOBURT
Where are you go—?
YEMILINA
(panting)
The community dungeon. You may as well stay where you are and swish your sword at passersby. Everyone hates the queen. Absolutely everyone!
WENOBURT
Liar!
YEMILINA
Almost there!
SOUND: Marketplace ambiance fading out
EXT – DUNGEON
SOUND: Dungeon ambiance fading in
YEMILINA
(coughing)
Whew, what a stench! Is this a deliberate part of our old criminal system? Prisoners must inhale the collective body odors of the entire dungeon? Why should soap be too good for them? Surely, they can still feel punished with a little soap and lavender.
SOUND: Ghost appearing
KING DAVID
Take care, daughter. The scoundrels behind those bars pre-date Wilzerlott’s superior system of transforming all criminals into frogs.
YEMILINA
Really, father! Just because they’re not frogs doesn’t mean they’re any danger to me. They’re chained up. I simply must do the same to this evil flag. It’s brainwashing a sweet young boy who should be obsessed with bugs.
WENOBURT
(distant panting)
SOUND: Distant running footsteps
SOUND: Soft dragon roar
SOUND: Close running footsteps
KING DAVID
I have another concern.
YEMILINA
Do you think we should offer these people the chance to become frogs? We never did use the new system to accommodate the formally convicted. Perhaps—
KING DAVID
The preference of criminals is not my concern. Rather, it is deeply concerning to me that my future son-in-law is still a dragon. Why hasn’t anyone restored him?
SOUND: Soft dragon roar
SOUND: Overlapping running footsteps
YEMILINA
(panting)
We can’t yet. We haven’t a suitable transformation potion. It has to be a powerful one, you know…dragons being so magical…their bodies repel …interference...Teloopa explained it once, but anyway…not now!
WENOBURT
(panting)
Off with your head, traitor! I’ll get you!
SOUND: Sword swipe
SOUND: Dragon roar
SOUND: Dragon flying
SOUND: Claws snatching body
SOUND: Sword clattering to the ground
WENOBURT
Ahhhh! Let go of me!
SOUND: Body kicks
SOUND: Torch bracket rattling
SOUND: Boots thumping wall
WENOBURT
(grunts)
I remember you. You’re the knight-dragon! I thought you ate sheep. I’m not a sheep! What are you doing to me? Get me down from here!
SOUND: Dragon roar
SOUND: Torch bracket rattling
SOUND: Boots thumping wall
YEMILINA
Take it easy, Wenoburt. That’s a very sturdy torch bracket. Sir JP just doesn’t want you running around in your current state.
WENOBURT
Why am I upside down?
YEMILINA
Because your tangled boot laces were the easiest part of you to snag on the torch bracket. Hang out for a bit. Think about how to tie your laces more snugly in future.
WENOBURT
I’m not staying here!
SOUND: Dragon roar
YEMILINA
I’m afraid my dragon-man insists. I’ll be back out shortly.
SOUND: Footsteps on dirt
INT – DUNGEON
SOUND: Stone door opens
SOUND: Footsteps on stone
SOUND: Prisoner jeers fading in
YEMILINA
Besides, the voices in here are far too unpleasant for a child’s ears.
SOUND: Ghost flying
KING DAVID
Silence, you festering sores! Carbuncles! Shut your foul mouths! Yemilina, I beg you to leave off your search. Locking up an evil object is a task for a squire.
YEMILINA
I haven’t a squire with me.
KING DAVID
Leave the flag in a pit somewhere and let rainfall drown it.
YEMILINA
No! I won’t leave it where it can be easily retrieved. If you want me to be done quickly, find me an empty cell. Go on. You could whoosh through this whole place in moments.
SOUND: Ghost flying
SOUND: Rattling chains
KING DAVID
I found a vacancy. This way.
SOUND: Ghost flying
SOUND: Footsteps on stone
SOUND: Dungeon door creaking
SOUND: Chains rattling
SOUND: Chains tightening
YEMILINA
There! Good and tight! You can’t even flap like a napkin into a lap now! No more shall you feel the wind rippling through your frayed and frizzy folds! You deserve nothing but mold and mildew!
KING DAVID
The flag cannot hear you rant, darling. It is not your mother.
YEMILINA
I have no mother! I wasn’t trying to talk to her!
KING DAVID
Forgive me. I must go check that the prisoners are secure. Their chains rattled in a most unsettling way when I passed through them.
SOUND: Ghost flying – fading out
SOUND: Time travel – arriving
NAZZY
There you are! Why are you poking around a dungeon?
YEMILINA
Why not? You abandoned me two days away so you could go to Enelcia’s intervention without me! What was I supposed to do? Twiddle my thumbs?
NAZZY
Sorry. You did great, though. The you I brought. You must remember.
YEMILINA
I tried to give the baby a toy…a cow, I think.
NAZZY
That’s right.
YEMILINA
I don’t think she liked it very much. I just remember frog croaks and the elf mom snapping at me. Was that really Enelcia? It’s…difficult…
NAZZY
To connect how you see her now to how you saw her then?
YEMILINA
Yes. I suppose that was the first time I met her properly. Before what I thought was the first time, when she was watering the castle gardens.
NAZZY
It’s okay to let the intervention memories get a bit fuzzy. It’s what childhood memories naturally do, even without time travel.
YEMILINA
(stiffly)
Refresh my memory then. How did it go?
NAZZY
Umm…we stirred up some feelings. I think we should let Enelcia sit with them for a while. Hope for the best.
YEMILINA
That poor baby! Are you sure you shouldn’t kidnap her? We could restore her to her original body somewhere far away.
NAZZY
That wouldn’t help. It would break Enelcia’s family worse than it’s already broken.
SOUND: Ghost flying – fading in.
YEMILINA
Some families you can’t fix. You can just protect the young and innocent from all the mistakes of the old, stubborn, corrupted, ludicrous, cavalier—
SOUND: Ghost whoosh
NAZZY
King David!
YEMILINA
Don’t stare at me so, father. You look too long for your beard when your eyes get like that.
KING DAVID
My eyes sag with the weight of my sorrow, my dear. I overheard you describing your mother through the guise of another’s problems.
YEMILINA
The queen, father, is nothing to me! Why would I describe her? Why would I even think of her? It’s your fault. Stop bringing her up.
KING DAVID
You wish to snuff out all thoughts of one who cared for you throughout your youth. The years that built you up into the woman you are cannot be so easily dismissed. She is too deeply ingrained in your past to be so swiftly silenced in your mind.
YEMILINA
It’s true. I learned too late. Nazzy, fetch my younger self and sear into her mind how evil the queen is. Show her the truth.
NAZZY
She doesn’t need that. She’ll learn through the natural course of time. And so will you.
YEMILINA
Learn what? I know everything important now.
NAZZY
Well…
YEMILINA
We’d better go get Wenoburt. The flag’s influence ought to be wearing off soon.
NAZZY
Are you sure? Just because you chained it up?
YEMILINA
You can take him home if need be. Let’s just go see how violent he is. Come on!
SOUND: Dungeon door creaking
SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on stone
SOUND: Ghost flying
SOUND: Jeering voices fading out
SOUND: Dungeon ambiance fading out
SOUND: Stone door closes
EXT – DUNGEON
Resume Wolf Banishing Drum
SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on dirt
WENOBURT
(improv: complaints about being stuck upside down)
SOUND: Torch bracket rattling
SOUND: Boots thumping wall
KING DAVID
Stop struggling, young man. Your boot laces are only tightening around that torch bracket. Wait calmly.
WENOBURT
I dropped my sword! I can’t fight off goblins!
NAZZY
Goblins? Where?
YEMILINA
Nowhere. It’s him. Why did you jump like that?
NAZZY
Sorry. Big overdose of dermavig yesterday. Happened to everyone at the intervention. I’m still a bit twitchy. How are you doing, Wenoburt?
WENOBURT
I’m upside down!
NAZZY
Apart from that. Did you actually see hostile goblins? You know we have alliances with some of them, right?
WENOBURT
Only the bad goblins are sneaking around. I can hear them creeping up on me and – it’s behind me!
SOUND: Tiny pattering feet
SOUND: Mouse squeaks
NAZZY
That’s a mouse.
YEMILINA
Vigilance might cling to him a bit longer then. But Wenoburt, how are you feeling about traitors to the crown?
WENOBURT
What traitors? Have the good goblins betrayed us? Or is it the mouse? That mouse looks very iffy. I’m gonna kill it.
SOUND: Mouse squeaks
SOUND: Dragon wings
YEMILINA
Please lower him to the ground.
SOUND: Soft Dragon roar
SOUND: Dragon wings
SOUND: Torch bracket rattling
SOUND: Body slide and thump
WENOBURT
Ow! That really hurt.
SOUND: Footsteps on dirt
SOUND: Sword dragging on ground
SOUND: Sword sheathed
YEMILINA
Are you all right?
WENOBURT
I have to fix my boots. It’ll take a long time. Can you watch for enemies while I have my eyes down?
YEMILINA
Okay, we will. Go right ahead.
SOUND: Boot laces pulling
YEMILINA
(quietly)
Aww, poor kid. Two magical ailments at once.
NAZZY
Speaking of, I wonder how long it took for Mijar’s sap bites to wear off. It must just be the music curse keeping him busy now.
YEMILINA
Do you suppose he’s kidnapped many bards and minstrels? They may be in danger.
NAZZY
Or they may be safer than before. Singers weren’t exactly at the top of Sir JP’s rescue list. If Mijar needs their voices, at least he’ll protect them from dragons.
SOUND: Dragon grunt
YEMILINA
Nazzy!
NAZZY
I’m not trying to blame Sir JP. All dragon slayers have their limits. It’s only natural to spend their efforts on the parts of society they value most.
YEMILINA
Fair point. You know, it says a lot about a culture – what we rush to protect in a crisis. Have we ever asked the cave people of the future to share their values, so we can learn more about them? I know they don’t have dragons, but if they have anything comparable that threatens more people than their heroes can effectively save…?
NAZZY
Who do they save first? I imagine it’s just as individual an answer as it is here between dragon slayers. But you can ask them yourself, next time I go there.
KING DAVID
Go there? A million years in the future?
YEMILINA
That’s when our audience lives, father. 2024, it’s called.
KING DAVID
You can’t go, Yemilina! The Time Klutz dropped you when she tried to take you there. We lost you for thirty-one years!
YEMILINA
For Nazzy, that incident was over thirty-one years ago. She’s had a long time to hone her skills. Just look how often she moves the children accurately through time. Besides, she moved me two days just now. Just as far as planned. Her plan, not mine, but—
(startled noise)
SOUND: Ghost flying
NAZZY
(startled noise)
KING DAVID
How could you, Time Meddler! You call yourself my daughter’s friend! How could you risk this again? How could you risk her unborn child on such a foolish journey!
NAZZY
I did a great deal of testing, Your Majesty. I won’t do it at her whim again. Not without preparing.
KING DAVID
Your preparations are worthless! I do not trust you!
NAZZY
You didn’t seem so fussed about it when you begged me to bring Yemilina to visit you in an even more distant future. A time when only tiny islands, mist people and giant fish are left on Earth.
KING DAVID
How dare you! I have never asked you to move my daughter through time. Never!
NAZZY
Right, you haven’t yet. I’m talking about future you. You asked me to bring child Yemilina to—
KING DAVID
I would never ask you! You will not move any version of her ever again!
SOUND: Ghost flying
YEMILINA
I want to meet the cave people. Don’t ruin this for me. Allow me to live my life the way I want, please!
SOUND: Ghost flying
KING DAVID
You have my blessing, not my permission.
YEMILINA
You said that when Sir JP asked to court me. I thought you meant your permission wasn’t needed, but from your tone now…
KING DAVID
Very different circumstances! It was ridiculous of Sir JP to ask my permission to pursue romantic entanglements with you. He didn’t want me. He expected your answer from my mouth.
YEMILINA
He’s old fashioned, father.
KING DAVID
In this case, however, my blessing is a prayer for your safe return and ‘not my permission’ means I forbid you to go.
YEMILINA
Oh. Well, I suppose I can understand that. You’re doing the right thing, father. I’m sure I’d do the same if my baby wanted to time travel. I promise I’ll think of you the whole time I’m there and I shall feel crippling shame for disobeying you.
KING DAVID
If you forget, I can give you guilt reminders in that distant future. It is a ghostly talent that won’t wane in the centuries to come. Farewell, my angel.
YEMILINA
Goodbye.
SOUND: Ghost departing
SOUND: Overlapping footsteps on dirt
EXT – EDGE OF MARKETPLACE
SOUND: Marketplace ambiance fading in
SOUND: Crowd murmurs fading in
SOUND: Distant music
MIJAR
(distant evil laugh)
YEMILINA
(gasp)
Mijar! Did you hear that laugh? I don’t see him!
SOUND: Crowd murmurs fading in
SOUND: Music fading out
NAZZY
He must be in that crowd heading back to the marketplace.
YEMILINA
Those minstrels are surely cursed to follow him. Ooo, if he’s blocking those headaches altogether, he may attack at any time.
NAZZY
Seems to be avoiding us for now. It might be costing him some strength to maintain control of his music providers.
YEMILINA
How will we defeat him once and for all? Did you jump ahead and watch our brilliant plan play out?
NAZZY
No, but I’m thinking we’ll need Teloopa’s past self. Possibly some giant boogers.
WENOBURT
And sap bugs!
YEMILINA
Ah, no, Wenoburt, let’s not. Sap bugs make fools of us all. We’d only—
WENOBURT
But they suck away a little power from magic people when they bite. One of them told me—
YEMILINA and NAZZY
What?
NAZZY
What do you mean one of them…?
WENOBURT
A sap bug talked to me once.
YEMILINA
You never said anything!
WENOBURT
(sigh)
That’s because I want to be a dragon slayer. I don’t want you to think I should focus on bugs. That’s my old life.
NAZZY
It’s okay to be a dragon slayer and a bug expert. Wilzerlott needs both.
WENOBURT
I guess so.
YEMILINA
Besides, you love bugs. You were going to warn beetles in your garden about–
(gasp)
I can’t believe that came back to me. I was so little. I remember…I asked you if you could talk to bugs. You didn’t answer me!
WENOBURT
Sorry.
NAZZY
Okay. So giant boogers, past Teloopa…and sap bugs.
YEMILINA
And we should take away all sources of music. Including me when sap bugs bite me.
NAZZY
We’ll have to shield ourselves from bites somehow.
SOUND: Dragon wings
WENOBURT
The sap bug told me Sir JP was stinky. We could try making ourselves smell as bad as him when he was a knight.
SOUND: Dragon roar
YEMILINA
I’m sure it was mostly my lucky kiss that made you immune, My Love. A Sap Bug can’t understand that. It was interpreting its aversion to you with the only framework it had.
WENOBURT
Your lucky kiss made him stink.
SOUND: Dragon groan
YEMILINA
You may recall, Wenoburt, that the reason Nazzy had to find you in the first place was because the queen demanded expert advice on the Sap Bugs that plagued Wilzerlott. You are in great danger of living up to your original purpose.
WENOBURT
Oh no!
NAZZY
That’s not a bad thing.
WENOBURT
She made it sound so bad.
NAZZY
That’s because you’re making her boyfriend feel self-conscious and she’s mad at her moth — the queen!
YEMILINA
It’s because he should be whatever he wants to be! She shouldn’t decide for him!
NAZZY
Deep breath. Let’s try to remember that Mijar is the looming tyrant threat.
YEMILINA
Oh, if only he and the queen would finish each other off!
WENOBURT
But the queen can’t die.
YEMILINA
Don’t remind me.
WENOBURT
And Mijar should be a frog, shouldn’t he?
NAZZY
That is how the law stands. We once told the cave people of the future that we don’t kill each other.
YEMILINA
(sigh)
Better say goodbye then, before we descend into savagery.
SOUND: Vivicord
NAZZY
Thank you for listening. If we are not chewed up by dragons, you shall soon hear more. Wish us luck.
YEMILINA
(brightly)
And humane justice.
NAZZY
Right…
SOUND: Closing theme music