EP 79: Stepping into a relationship with Trauma

In this Beyond the 1st Response episode, Christy and Ciara talked about moving forward after loss and trauma.

Communicating Traumas

Christy and Ciara talked about how talking about your traumas is essential in healing, helping your mental health, and how you could be helping someone. 

Holding in your feelings and not talking about the things hurting you is part of the stigma, and why we talk so much about communicating them in a healthy way. 

“Trauma isn’t neat and tidy—it doesn’t arrive neatly packaged and tied up with a bow. Instead, it’s bewildering and chaotic. We may want to talk about it, but we don’t know what to say or how to say it.” 

Part of the reason people believe to not talk about it is because of not understanding the process of healing and helping. For a long time society has taught us to not share our sorrows, our traumas, or our mental states. Talking about it was frowned upon. That stigma still happens every day, but being open and sharing your story is a healthy way to get through your battles. 

We had a hard conversation about relationships and trauma. When we say “relationships” it’s not just your relationship with significant others, but friends, family, even work. How they can negatively impact you, and your “triggers,” just because they may be struggling you feel like all your past bubbles to the surface. It doesn’t minimize what they are going through, but it can affect you to the extent that you shut down. 

What can you do on a daily basis to help you in these difficult times? What tools have you used to recognize that feeling and get through?

As a society we have become desensitized to traumas, and that isn’t ok. It is when we all quit feeling and losing compassion. We need to be listening to each other, and encouraging each other to speak up. Support one another through the trauma, and encourage the healing. 

Don’t Extinguish Your Fire

Remember you are your biggest advocate, only you can help and heal you. Recognize the good and bad in your life and continue working through them, even if they are bad behaviors/coping skills, recognizing them sets you on a road to healing. 

Don’t let anyone ever tell you that your work isn’t good enough, if you are doing the hard work you are succeeding. Their inner turmoil is not for you to fix. We can only fix ourselves, and when doing so we are setting those boundaries for not just the people around us but also for our own inner peace. 

Show Links

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