A Caregiver Used Paid Leave and Helps Take Care of Her Sister Out of State.

November is National Family Caregivers Month.  58% of caregivers are women. Almost one-third of caregivers provide care at least 20 hours a week.  About 80 percent of caregivers care for adults aged 50 or older, and one in 6 non-caregivers expects to become a caregiver within two years.

Caregiver leave under CT Paid Leave allows you to take time away from work to care for a loved one who is undergoing a serious health or family issue. Caregivers can be blood related but don’t have to be, they can also be related by affinity. That means that the person is like a family member, and it could be a best friend or a cousin or a neighbor or someone you live with but aren’t married to. You are allowed to take up to 12 weeks of income replacement in a calendar year.

 My guest is caregiver Mya Baldwin. Mya cared for her sister who was diagnosed with a recurrence of breast cancer while she was pregnant with twin boys and living in New Jersey. Mya talks about how paid leave gave her 12 weeks of income replacement to help her sister with chemo treatments, and to help after the birth of her twin boys. Mya says that caregiver leave allowed her the flexibility to take time away from work so she could focus on the health and well-being of her sister.

To find out more about caregiver leave, or to apply for benefits go to: CT Paid Leave

https://ctpaidleave.org/s/?language=en_US



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Transcript

Nancy Barrow: 0:01

Hello, Connecticut and welcome to the paid leave podcast. The title basically says it all. I'm Nancy Barrow and I will be delving into this new state program and how it can help you and your family. This podcast will give you information you should know about Connecticut paid leave, and maybe just a little bit more. Connecticut paid leave brings peace of mind to your home, family and workplace. Welcome to the paid leave podcast. November is National caregivers month and as a highlight of this, we're going to talk about caregivers and caregiver leave. 58% of caregivers are women. That's not a surprise and almost 1/3 of caregivers provide care for at least 20 hours a week. Caregivers typically learn as you go and aren't formally trained and about 80% of caregivers care for adults aged 50 or older. And one in six non caregivers expects to become a caregiver within two years. Caregiver leave under Connecticut paid leave allows you to take time away from work. So you can care for a loved one who is undergoing a serious health or family issue. And caregivers can be blood related, but they don't have to be they can also be related by affinity. And that is like a family member. It could be a best friend or a cousin or a neighbor or someone you live with but aren't necessarily married to. And you're allowed to take up to 12 weeks of income replacement in a calendar year. Today I'm speaking with a caregiver who did help a blood relative and it's a pretty amazing story. Mya Baldwin, welcome to the podcast.

Mya Baldwin: 1:39

Thank you. Thank you so much for having me on here.

Nancy Barrow: 1:42

Well, we met at an at an event and you came up to me to tell me how much this program meant to you. And I just have to tell you, thank you because it's always nice to hear what we're doing right.

Mya Baldwin: 1:51

Thank you guys. It's It was honestly a bit of like a breath of fresh air and just knowing that I was able to get some income per week for up to 12 weeks take care of my sister. It definitely took a lot of pressure on my shoulders.

Nancy Barrow: 2:05

Yeah When the program works for a family like yours and definitely works. Yeah, it really is what we're all about. And I'm so thankful that you're here to talk about what happened with your sister and tell me your situation and why you had to become a caregiver to your sister.

Mya Baldwin: 2:21

Sure. So in March of this year, my sister was re diagnosed it was a reoccurrence for her breast cancer. Because last year in November, she had a mastectomy. She didn't do a double mastectomy, just singular. And she had a reoccurrence in the same breast and she had the mastectomy on. But the thing is that she was pregnant, she was pregnant twin boys at the time. So it was very, it was very crazy for her. Because the doctors said we want to terminate your pregnancy so you can continue to get chemo and get her breasts removed, like her other breasts removed and removed the lungs of every occurred in her right breast. And she's like, that's not what I'm doing at all. So she took on the challenge of going through chemo while pregnant. And it was a crazy ride, to say the least. So I was going back and forth from New Jersey to Connecticut, about once or twice a week taking her to her chemo appointments. Fingers, right doctor's appointments just because her husband's at home, like he was still working like and he couldn't be there all the time to take her to our appointments. My mom works a ton. So like we're very small family. So it was literally like just me and my sister. So I realized at one point that it was just taking a toll on me at my job, mentally physically, like doing the back and forth. And the traveling, it was really hard. It was very, very hard. So I talked to my HR person, and she recommended I do not get paid leave, and is 12 weeks of paid leave, she was like going to the paid leave, you have to make sure you get all your paperwork in 30 days before so they can review your case assigned to a case manager. So I got all my ducks in a row submitted all my paperwork. And I got approved I want to say since when I submitted my paperwork, probably about two weeks after I got approved. And they told me the time when when we get paid, and how long we get paid for and the benefit amount we receive each week. So that's kind of how I got into my caregiver role and it was a ride. I'd say that in the beginning. I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't know where to start what to do. But as the weeks went on, they progressed. i We got into a good swing of things. And she had her babies at 32 to 32 weeks, five days. So super early. And I think I was there they she went into an emergency C section actually, because that day she developed preeclampsia. And the doctor said yeah, you we have to give birth today. We have to get these babies out of you today.

Nancy Barrow: 4:54

Wow. Did she did she take any paid leave from New Jersey?

Mya Baldwin: 5:00

She was able to get through her job. I want to say, long term disability, it turns from short term to long term disability just because of her chemo treatments. Because I'm not sure if they offer like a paid leave, but they do offer job protection in the option for short and long term disability. So that's what she went through.

Nancy Barrow: 5:24

New Jersey has a paid leave program. So it'd be really interesting to find out if she was able to use that or maybe, you know, she just utilized her short term and long term disability. So

Mya Baldwin: 5:34

because she lives in New Jersey, but she does work in New York, so they both have not really, yeah, yeah. So she probably did a combination. Yeah. Maternity long term, short term. But I know that she was able to get her income replaced as well through the programs that they have set up, which

Nancy Barrow: 5:50

is great if you have a good company like that. That's wonderful that well, seriously. It's really wonderful. So was she diagnosed with cancer while she was pregnant? Or were they pretty close together?

Mya Baldwin: 6:00

And were very close together? Because she noticed there were like lumps in her breasts, because as I said, last year, she did have a mastectomy. So it was a reoccurrence in the same breast . But she was going around the breast, and she felt the lumps.

Nancy Barrow: 6:16

It's so important to do those monthly tests. My mother found hers. Yeah,

Mya Baldwin: 6:21

yes, it's very important to do those monthly checks. And we just thought it was on her. No, maybe it's like a benign, maybe it's just like tissue buildup. And she was like, No, this does not go right. So she went, they did a biopsy, and come to find out to reoccurrence of her breast cancer. But she was also at that time, she wasn't too far along in her pregnancy. But she just found out she was having like, there was twins. She didn't know the sex yet. But she found out she was having twins. And it was I mean, of course a roller coaster of emotions because you want your pregnancy to go smooth and everything will be fine. And then the doctors are basically telling you, we want you to terminate your pregnancy. We don't think that this will be good for you. You know, we've seen cases like this. But my sister despite all odds, she still went through with it. And she was like, you know anything to for my babies and make it hair safe? Yeah. And they did. And I have to sweet little nephews to see little boys that I love very, very much. And honestly, if you look back in March, I would have been like, I don't know what's going to happen. Like, I'm just praying for the best. And we back and we were like, you know, everything will be fine.

Nancy Barrow: 7:29

Do you have a big family?

Mya Baldwin: 7:30

I do. I'd have a big family. We're all very family oriented person. So that's why it didn't. I didn't care if I didn't get paid. I was like I had to take some time off to be there. Exactly. You're really close with your sister. Yes I'm very close. I have one sister and I have one brother. They're both older than me. But for me, family is super important. It's definitely failing over everything. So even if I wasn't getting an income placement, I still would have taken the time off. So the income replacement was definitely a benefit and a savior.

Nancy Barrow: 8:01

Yeah. So when you heard the news, there was no doubt in your mind that yo u're going to be there for your sister. It was That was just a given.

Mya Baldwin: 8:07

Yeah, again, there was no doubt for me, it was just figuring out the time and figuring out the schedule. Because I was still I'm still working, I was still working full time, you know, five days a week. So going back and forth. Sometimes it can be a lot on it like someone. So I decided I wanted to start my leave in July, because it was about a month before she was already going to have a C section like a scheduled C section. So it gave us like a month before so I can spend some time with her. We can kind of you know, go baby shopping and you know, get their nursery together while still being able to go to her chemo treatments with her when I can or even is just at home, like helping prepare meals or just helping take some burden off somewhere.

Nancy Barrow: 8:51

Yeah, that's what that's what a caregiver does. Yeah.

Mya Baldwin: 8:55

Yeah. And like that's such a big part of being a caregiver, as like your tasks may vary from day to day. But all in all, what you're doing is something to alleviate the burden on that person and their family. And that's what you do for your family.

Nancy Barrow: 9:09

Did you know about Connecticut paid leave before you needed it? No. Yeah. And I think that's it.

Mya Baldwin: 9:14

It's just so bad. Like I didn't even know. Like, I knew I heard about it. I didn't really know what the program was about. I just knew that it was something that came out of my check. It wasn't a big amount. It was a very small percentage of my check. So it was like I didn't miss the money. And I didn't really know too much about it until I talked to my HR generalist. And she was like my I'm gonna send you some links read up on it. And you know, come back and tell me what you think how you're feeling? What do you want to do? So then, the next two weeks, I was researching CT Paid leave. Like what like what is it like how can I get it? What I what do I need for you guys? Like how long do I need to submit my paperwork? So did you do this? I did that.

Nancy Barrow: 9:58

Yeah. Did you apply? On your computer or on your phone, or how did you apply

Mya Baldwin: 10:03

I did on my computer. And it was very easy. So what I did, I saved all of the paperwork that I needed to upload, print it off, got all the signatures that I needed. So I sent over the paperwork to my sister's doctor. And when they uploaded it actually went directly to the Aflac portal. I didn't mean to do anything once I sent it to them. Yeah. So I thought I was super cool, because I was waiting for them to get back to me. But they that was the last paper it goes missing. And I go on, I'm like, Oh, the uploaded already.

Nancy Barrow: 10:31

Which is great, right? The forms to fill out. They're really nice. They send them to you. And then it's just it's easy.

Mya Baldwin: 10:37

Yeah, like the forms are very straightforward. Very easy to follow, very easy to answer. And I just uploaded I scanned it on my phone, put it to the Aflac portal, and it took about a week or two, get they got back to me right before literally the day I was was my last day of work. Would you like what scene they called me, it was around three o'clock saying get all your cases approved. This your benefit amount, if you need anything reach out to us. They call me send an email and like uploaded the message on my portal too. So I was like, right in the nick of time,

Nancy Barrow: 11:11

which is awesome. And you took that 12 weeks in a block, but you do know they have intermittent leave and reduce schedule leave.

Mya Baldwin: 11:18

Me and my HR generalist. So we were weighing up options. She was like, you know, you can do it continuously. You can do intermittent or you can do like a reduced schedule. But I decided I was like no, I think I just want to take the 12 weeks straight and just completely like immerse myself because why not? Because the option is there. And it just worked better for my schedule. So I was like, You know what, let me just take this time off completely and dedicate it.

Nancy Barrow: 11:42

Yeah, yeah. Was Being a caregiver what you expected it to be?

Mya Baldwin: 11:46

yes and no. And I say yes, because I've, I guess I've always fallen into a caregiver role. Because my father, I was also a caregiver for my father, because he was sick for quite some time, he had stage four prostate cancer, and I can just congestive heart failure. So there are times that he could interrupt his appointments or, you know, simple things like that. So I always naturally fall into the caregiver role. I think it's just a different one. It's a sibling and not a parent. And my sister, she's like, one of the strongest people I know, so to see her, you know, maybe not at her best, and I just want to do everything, I just want to like be there for her and like, find a way to make her feel better some type of way. And I say no, because some days, you know, you're driving to appointments or other days you're cooking. But what I will say is that it's you never know what's going to happen was always fun. Because the day that she gave birth, we were just going to her weekly checkup. You know, it was a regular Friday, August 11. We were going through her checkup. And the doctor, the doctor, you know, had her do like a urine says her pee came back positive for their like protein, her urine, all these things. And she ended up having to give birth that same day. So like, you know, we didn't expect back her scheduled C section was the 18th. and it got moved up from the 18th. Because it wasn't really the 26th of August. If on the 26th it got moved to the 18th. And then that day Her doctor said, This is it. So it was an adventure. I will say that they we didn't expect that. I mean, Neither did she she wasn't ready for that. So her husband, he packed her bag, his bag, rushed on to the hospital. And she gave her birth that day.

Nancy Barrow: 13:36

Well, or let me ask you this. Did you both discuss what she needed from you? Was there a conversation about what the expectations were?

Mya Baldwin: 13:44

Yes but my sister and I we also understand each other so well, something's totally words. Yeah, we have the sisterly bond, I guess you can say are simply understanding where I can see where she needed help or where I can fit myself in. So that's what I did. But if she definitely needed, if she wanted me to be somewhere with her, like she would say that. But other than that, like, I would just kind of read the room, I guess you can say and just be there for her. Sometimes she just wanted somebody to be there with her. And that's all you need is somebody just another body and other person to be there to talk to you take your mind off of it. Because when you're going through these things you don't, you constantly don't want to talk about it. You don't always want to say, you know, I feel bad or oh, you know, this time feeling you just want somebody to be there with you. They just talk to you and take your mind off of it. So I would definitely say that. She didn't give me like a list of I needed to do X Y and Z Definitely not. But we just had that common understanding of like, I just need somebody somedays or no.

Nancy Barrow: 14:57

Yeah, it was sort of like it was a go a learning as you go,

Mya Baldwin: 15:02

definitely learning as you go. And like I said, not every day is the same, or it is completely different. So definitely having people that can, like you can lean on, and just kind of when you're at 20%, or 80%, they can make up for what you're lacking that day, it's definitely great to have somebody there. And I was happy to be there and be that person for her when, if and when needed. Because, you know, some days, we're not 100%, and you kind of just meet that next person to be like, you know, I got you or like, you know, what, we'll figure this out together, or just kind of help you get through that next day. You know, because people, you know, they're always they're not always going to ask for help. We have people sometimes just take on so much of a burden by ourselves that we don't always stop and ask for help or ask someone to help us. So to be for someone else to be able to recognize that and step up to the plate. And willingly. I think that's definitely the role that I played, like, I seen the issue. And I was like, you know, what, where can I play a part? Where can I step up and be there for my sister. So that definitely was great. It definitely came in handy some days, some nights. And then after they were born, I spent, I would do like, for four on four off, I would spend four or five days there, that I would come back to Connecticut, kind of just get my things situated and then go back for another four or five days. And then right before I returned to work, I was there for about 9 or 10 days, it just did a super long haul because I was I was going back to work, I wasn't able to see her or like the kids for a while. So I stayed there as long as I could.

Nancy Barrow: 16:46

Did you know that caregiver leave can also be related by affinity? So you don't have to be related by blood? So yeah, so if you're related by affinity, like if you have a best friend who's going through, you know, a health crisis or giving birth, or, you know, cousin coworker, or you know, someone that you're living with, you could be a caregiver to them as well. I love the expanded definition of family that we have.

Mya Baldwin: 17:12

I did not know that at all. Wow. So say so say for example, even if it's saved my best friend, and she, like needed surgery, I would be able to get that time off to. That's amazing. I think more people should know about that. Because that is

Nancy Barrow: 17:29

I know, it's amazing, right?

Mya Baldwin: 17:30

I didn't I didn't know.

Nancy Barrow: 17:32

So now you'd have to wait like another calendar year from when you started. Right? So then, so let's hope that nobody needs you until the year is is up, hopefully, would you recommend Connecticut paid leave to anyone who might need to do caregiver leave?

Mya Baldwin: 17:47

I would recommend it to everyone. And as long as you're paying into it, you know, you should be if you need it, then take it. It doesn't hurt to say you know what I need to take time off. Because I, for myself, I'm very prideful. I don't like to ask for help. A lot of time, I don't like to say you know, I need time off. But if you need to take it, it's going to be better for your mental health, the person that you're helping. And it's also good to know that you won't miss any money because especially in this economy with everything that's happening, you know, you can't really afford to not get paid. Well, I mean, if you can, you're very lucky. But a lot of us can't afford to not receive some type of income. So having that supplemental pay really bridges that gap. It's like, you know, I'm getting something and I'm still being able to help. Whether it's my mom, well, not that I know your best friend or somebody that you're close with. It doesn't have to be blood related. And that is exactly what I would would definitely recommend CT Paid Leave.

Nancy Barrow: 18:50

Tell me what the most challenging part of this experience it was for you, Mya.

Mya Baldwin: 18:55

Honestly, just getting my paperwork in I have to be honest. For me, it was just making sure everything was fine. Because once I was on leave, it wasn't challenging for me at all. Like being a caregiver wasn't challenging, like being there. For my family. It wasn't for me, it wasn't challenging at all. Honestly, guys, I would say the hardest part is making sure paperwork isn't in on time and getting everything in. But other than that, the process is so smooth. If you're not caught, you don't have to call every week to make sure you're getting paid. You don't have to constantly keep checking up on your case. And that takes off so much pressure. And I guess it just depends on person to person. But for me, my leave experience was great there.

Nancy Barrow: 19:33

And it's nice to know that the paperwork was pretty easy. You know, one of the things when people get denied it's usually because the dates on the med certs aren't the same as the date on your employer verification forms.

Mya Baldwin: 19:46

I did run into that just because we didn't have her chemo dates past October one, and my return to work date was October 10. So once we were able to get that paperwork into CT Paid Leave from her provider, the turnaround time was fairly quick, it was about a week. So they did do like a retro pay. And I did get the pay for that week. So even that even though I did hit like a bump towards the end, it was still like a pretty smooth bump, I will say, and it wasn't a headache. Even if you do run into a bump, it's not oh my god, the end of the world, like, I don't know what I'm gonna do. It was a very smooth process. And I called into like the one 800 Number, just to make sure that like I sorted everything. And my case manager, it took about a week to look over it. And I got paid. Right after that, the retro pay.

Nancy Barrow: 20:36

Fantastic! It's great news that you have that, if your sister were here with us, what do you think she would say about the experience of you being able to take 12 weeks off?

Mya Baldwin: 20:46

and she's like, just forever grateful that I was able to take that time off to be able to be there with her when she needed me. And just, she would just be so happy. She's like, because I you know, we love spending time with each other. That's like, there's nothing like having a sister. So it's just also being able to better bond and spend more time with each other was also I'll forever be happy for that. But I feel like that's what she would say should be very grateful, very happy that I was able to take that time off and just be there with her. For sure.

Nancy Barrow: 21:16

Did she know you were doing this podcast?

Mya Baldwin: 21:19

She was like, oh my god, really? I said, yeah, it was so funny. I told her the way that it happened. I was like getting I was just doing an event. For my job. I was at a Community conference because what with Access Health, like I'm a navigator for access Health and I work for the County Health Center Association of Connecticut. And so I had to be there anyway. So I was like, just by random chance. Like we had like two place cards. And I went over and I asked my supervisor, I was like, hey, you know, we have two place cards. But CT Paid Leave doesn't have a table. Are they supposed to be next to us? And then we're like, oh, yeah, sorry, we forgot to move that. And then me being the person that I am. I just struck up a conversation. And just we just kind of kept going. And it was really great energy, great air. And I was like, I don't know how it happened. And then I was like, and then Nancy asked me to be on a podcast. I was like, I've never done one. But sure.

Nancy Barrow: 22:11

See, you're doing a great job right now. So

Mya Baldwin: 22:13

like, but I was like, but Sure. Why not? I would love to share my story. While our story was like, Whoa, good job. I can't wait to hear it.

Nancy Barrow: 22:20

Yeah it's great that you are sharing it because you know, you're helping someone else who's going through, like, you know, telling people how easy it was for you and, and how valuable it was to you. You know, that's one of the things is great. How is your sister's health right now?

Mya Baldwin: 22:34

Oh, she's doing very good. She's in her third, third or fourth week of her chemo treatment, that's 12 weeks. And then after they're, they're gonna do targeted radiation. And her radiation then it'll be every day, I believe for about six to eight weeks. And then hopefully, God's willing, I know, I know she will be by them cancer free. Not another cancerous cell in her body. So but ya know, she's doing pretty good right now. She just happy to be there to be home with her kids.

Nancy Barrow: 23:11

Is she allowed to work right now? Or is she taking time away from work?

Mya Baldwin: 23:14

She's taking time off just because of how invasive like chemo can be in your body. Chemo takes a toll on your body, you know, really bad. So she isn't working right now. And I don't think she's allowed to work either. Just because of everything that's been happening. Or her job is like very understanding very, for they're working with her very well. Very, very flexible. So hopefully, she'll be able to go back to work next year after her radiation because he can only do radiation every day and then still be expected to go to work. That's a tough, it's a tough road is a tough road, but she's just glad that she's making it towards the end of that road. And she's gonna make it out healthy. Her kids will make their they're healthy, they're very healthy. And that's all she could ever ask for. That's That was her model. She's like, you know, as long as the kids are healthy, I'm I'm okay. As long as my kids are fine, I'm okay. So she is a tough cookie. But, ya know, she's doing really, really good.

Nancy Barrow: 24:17

That's wonderful. We're really glad to hear that about your sister's health and

Mya Baldwin: 24:21

Connecticut paid leave, and just been a savior in so many ways. I just couldn't imagine living in a state where we're not going to take more, we're not going to take more, we didn't have an option like this. And you would have to go so long without pay, taking care of a loved one or a best friend because life happens, things happen. And I feel like that's what's your course. So CT Paid leave is all about. You know, it's the unexpected things that happen to us. We will never know. We will never know. I didn't think it was what I had. I didn't think I was gonna need 12 weeks off. You know, I didn't think I was gonna take it. But you know, I'm just super, super glad that I was able to get the 12 weeks off and get the opportunity to be there. And so I will continue to pay it, I'll pay it to CT Paid Leave, they want to take more, I don't care, you can rest easy about that. Yes but if you guys needed to I would not be upset, because I know the benefits of the program and what it entails. So

Nancy Barrow: 25:25

that's amazing. And what lastly, what advice would you give someone about applying.

Mya Baldwin: 25:29

Make sure that you get all of your paperwork in the 30 days before because you have to apply 30 before the actual date that you're looking for to start your leave. So I would say even before 30 days, two weeks before, if you're talking to your HR generalist anyone involved at your job, make sure you get all those things in order. That's why it's been two weeks before the thirty days I've had meetings with you know, my supervisors just like No Hey, I'm going to be out for three months. And if you need me I will be available but just kind of getting those ducks in a row because it'll make your approval much smoother. It'll make your the whole process much smoother and you won't be worrying up until the last day of your leave to submit anything or you may or may not get to finish something before you start leaves and I'd have to redo your paperwork and all that so just be as prepared proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance so please please please yeah, everything and have everything lined up so when it's time to go It's time to go I would recommend this to everybody if you if you're taking care of someone or you know if you really need it, it's there okay.

Nancy Barrow: 26:53

I appreciate you Mya Baldwin thank you for telling your story and sharing how caregiver leave under Connecticut paid leave really benefited you and your sister.

Mya Baldwin: 27:02

Yes, thank you guys for having me. This was great.

Nancy Barrow: 27:04

If you need to find out more about caregiver leave or how to apply for benefits. Please go to CTPaidleave.org. This has been another edition of the paid leave podcast. Please like and subscribe so you'll be notified about new podcasts that become available. Connecticut paid leave is a public act with a personal purpose. I'm Nancy Barrow and thanks for listening!