Wake up and Thrive
Bridget Covill is a Feminine Embodiment/ Relationship Coach, a wife, a mom of 4, and a Women's health RN sharing tangible tools to help you FEEL wildly turned on by life again. She is the CEO of Find Her Wild Coaching. In this space, we will apply holistic coaching tools to everyday moments that we deem hard. Instead of allowing these experiences to keep us stuck, we will lean into their lessons and let them wake us up. These tools will help you connect deeper to yourself, your purpose, and to the people in your life. Grab a cup of coffee, have something to take notes and keep an open mind. It's time....it's time to WAKE UP & THRIVE.
Wake up and Thrive
Ep100- A Farewell Episdoe: How to Navigate Change with Faith and Learn to Let Go to Receive Deeper Purpose
This is my longest, and dare I say most vulnerable solo episode! Buckle up, and get ready to hear my journey of learning to truly surrender to my plan so that someONE else's can be received!
What if stepping away from something you love could lead to a life of deeper purpose and fulfillment? Join me as I share my poignant decision to leave the online portion of my coaching business, Find Her Wild. After five transformative years filled with growth, gratitude, and precious client connections, I’ve decided to focus on local breathwork events, retreats and supporting community workshops, while continuing to take one-to-one coaching by referral only. This heartfelt transition, led by profound guidance and reflection, brings a sense of peace and clarity to this new chapter of my life. And it has been a long time since I felt this way.
Join me as I revisit my entire journey since entering the personal & self-development world as an online coach. I have has many highs, and honestly maybe just as many lows. No matter who you talk to, the rollercoaster seems inevitable and normal. So, I really had to ask, do I actually desire what is normal?
It took collaborative on a retreat with my new friends Becky and Julie as they underscored the importance of teamwork and integrating my faith into my work, a practice that has been transformative. Praying with my team highlighted the necessity of keeping faith at the forefront of my endeavors, which I had lost for a while.
Social media's role in our lives, particularly Instagram, has evolved from a space of authentic sharing to a source of stress and comparison. My journey away from the platform has led to increased creativity and joy. I share insights on navigating significant life changes with faith and integrity, emphasizing the importance of not making hasty decisions and instead, reconnecting with core values and spiritual beliefs. Learn about the exciting opportunities ahead, including in-person breathwork sessions and future retreats, by joining my email list for updates. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of living awake, aligned, and in tune with a higher purpose.
If you ever want to connect please reach out to me via email bridget@findherwildcoaching.com!
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If you want to inquire about coaching and receiving support in helping you create stronger connections to yourself, your purpose, and those in your life email me your story here....bridget@findherwildcoaching.com
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So hello and welcome back to what is most likely my last episode on Wake Up and Thrive. Hello and welcome to Wake Up and Thrive. My name is Bridget and I'm your host. My intention for this space is to help women around the world live more awake, aligned and truly alive. I believe wholeheartedly that we are designed to live, feel and experience the full range that life has to offer, and in doing so, we can live fully turned on in all areas. My story began with sobriety and has since been an initiation into rediscovering parts of myself that I forgot about or had abandoned. Learning to reclaim all of who I am has been the greatest gift of living awake, and together we will go on a journey of helping you to do the same. You can expect to learn practical tools to help you connect deeper to yourself, your purpose and those in your life. All you need is an open heart and an open mind. So if you're ready, it's time. It's time to wake up and thrive. So you guys, I have been putting off this episode, but deep down, I've also known this episode was coming for a while. Now I have a really big announcement, exciting announcement, exciting news to share, and it's definitely coming with a mix of emotions. Right, I'm feeling sadness for the ending of a chapter, I'm feeling a little bit of fear for the unknown future, but, honestly, in this present moment, I feel an exact mix of excitement and overall peace about what I'm stepping into and this new season of change, about what I'm stepping into and this new season of change. So, after a lot of prayer, guidance and reflection, both from within, you know, spiritually with God, and then with my mentors and those closest to me, like my husband, my mom, my friends, my friends, I have decided to step away from the online portion of Find Her Wild coaching that I started and stepped into five years ago, and so I had no idea what I was like, the type of world I was stepping into, but I really trusted it was what I was supposed to be doing. And although I've had a lot of success and I've had a lot of failure, I mean this sincerely when I say I have zero regrets about my journey over the last five years, which is why it makes it so fully complete, which I'll really kind of go into a little bit more later. But again, what does this mean? So it means I will no longer be putting out content and producing on Instagram. So if you try to contact me on Instagram, most likely you will not get a response. You'll have to get on my email list or I will be on my personal Facebook page just sharing about my family and our life, but no more pushing things out to Instagram. This will include me stepping away from my podcast, because this is part of my online business and marketing that and getting really great guests for you guys to come on cross-marketing. So all that stuff will stop.
Speaker 1:And then, of course, creating and running pre-recorded and live coaching programs. So I have really experimented with a lot. I've experienced it with live classes, recorded classes, live trainings, recorded trainings, one-to-one group coaching calls, group teachings, live just so many different variations one day, multiple days, multiple weeks and I have enjoyed them. But I have noticed with each one because I kept thinking it was like, oh, it's just my first one or it's just my first one with this many people. But there was always just, I don't know, it was so hard for me to market and put it out there, no matter how well it was received or how successful I knew it could be. There was just something that wasn't working. And again, that's not to discount any of the women that found themselves in, but when I talk about it's not working, meaning the goals that I had really projected for my business and then what I was producing and what I was seeing, despite what I thought was taking really aligned action, you know. So those online portions are going to go away.
Speaker 1:What will I still be doing? So I will still be hosting breathwork, either local, in studio events or kind of around town, so around where I live, or I am being invited into other people's workshops and events and retreats, and that's actually a really big favorite of mine because I think I'm you know, with my news that I'll go into in just a second I'm really looking more to step into a supportive role, but I still love to support my clients and women. So I will still be taking one-to-one clients and, of course, we will just meet off hours, so in the evenings, on weekends, which I recognize will actually work a lot better for many of you. So if that's something that is calling to you, get on my list because I already have a few people that have asked. So I will be taking a few one-to-one clients, starting in the fall, but again by referral only and for me, only when it feels 100% aligned. I will no longer have to feel like I had been, which is really unfortunate to admit, but just like this graspy, like I have to sign clients, and my most recent client that I just completed with was such an ideal client. She was so perfect for what I thought I could teach and I hope you know I can. I can only pray that our work together really served her. But she came from a referral. She came from me serving another client and I just remember how good that felt and how good the entire time it felt that we worked together. But, yeah, so anyways, still taking one-to-one clients, but only by referral, only, not doing any online marketing.
Speaker 1:And again, I'm not saying this is forever, but, as I told my clients, I will not come back into the online space unless I feel as much peace as I do making the decision to leave. So I want to just take a moment to share with you why I came to this decision and sort of what the next steps are for me. Um, because for some of you, we've been together for a really long time and I just I feel like I owe that to you. So I want to start by, first and foremost, thanking all of you. Oh, we're not even going to edit this because this is our last one. We're just going to keep it real.
Speaker 1:But again, I want to first start with thanking all of you this last month, as I have been off social media completely, yet my listenership is that even a word, I don't know it should be. It has stayed consistent, and so this tells me that you all are coming back to this podcast because you have felt inspired in some way by this space, and not necessarily because of what you've seen online, meaning those graphics and all that stuff and people sharing it means you truly are coming back because of my voice and my heart and my experience, and that is so cool, that's so, so cool, and yet it doesn't change the peace I feel about leaving, which is really important to remember. I want you guys to remember that, and it also makes the last two years of this journey so worth it. So worth it because I really do, even though I haven't seen many of you in person. I have formed a community because you guys keep coming back, and so that's just super, super cool for me. So thank you and, honestly, you are the reason I've stayed consistent for so long.
Speaker 1:When I first started, I was doing research and I remember listening to a podcast about podcasts and making them and the man said very few people will make it to a hundred episodes. Most people will start a podcast and give up before it can even establish a loyal following. Well, we are here because today is the hundredth new published episode and I'm so freaking proud of all of us for sticking with it, for showing up when the episodes were not that great, when the audio was not that great, when whatever the guests might cut out, when it wasn't edited properly. Many of you showed up maybe at first because you just loved me and wanted to support me, but you continue to show up because, truly, I mean, the reason I stayed committed since 2022 and consistently shown up here with my beliefs and my experience is because I wanted and prayed that I would be able to wake you up and I think we've done just that. And I think we've done just that.
Speaker 1:Hearing from so many of you and receiving different messages over the years saying this particular episode really touched me, or even just asking further questions to go deeper, it filled me in such a deep, deep way that I'm not kidding you, none of my programs ever could, because it was something that I truly created with absolutely no agenda, zero idea of who it would reach or if it would make an impact. But it felt so true to me, whereas when you create online programs, you have to market it in a certain way, talk to it, you have to sort of form it in a way to attract the masses, if you will, especially when you're trying to do group programs and you're trying to, you're marketing it as a group and then you only have one person sign up. That's happened to me multiple times. So really, just, yeah, I don't know, I don't even know what I was saying, but hearing from well, that's what it was. It was just like really hearing from so many of you guys and so many of your what you liked, that you even liked it. Like sometimes I just got general comments about the podcast and it just, oh my God, it lit me up.
Speaker 1:But I want to give a huge personal shout out to my mom, my sister-in-law, ashley, and then I'm going to name. Well, first of all, let me just say my mom and sister-in-law, hands down without a doubt, have listened to every single episode and it's just, it's absolutely amazing. Like my sister-in-law will be cooking in the kitchen tending to her toddler and she will have her air pod in and then she'll like yell at my brother. I'm listening to, bridget, and I just love that Like. I love that visual. I love that. I just love that. Again, I know they have first at first tuned in for support, but you guys can't lie, you like it. That's why you keep coming back. But huge shout out to my mom and my sister-in-law, ashley Love you guys.
Speaker 1:And then my past clients, bridget, kelsey, courtney and Brooke, just to name a few. And then one of my oldest friends, kate, from high school. I have hearing from you guys over the last year. Your names really stick out in my mind because I had worked with you guys. So I really remember the specific episodes that really touched each of you and why it touched you, and it's just really, really cool. It's really cool to be able to continue to support you even when our time together has finished.
Speaker 1:And that was one of that was, you know, a few of the magical, magical ways that I have really enjoyed this process of creating a podcast, and so I want to share that and I really want that to hone home, because I'm not walking out on a low note, like I'm really really proud of what I created and yet at the same time, equally, it feels so right to go. I also recently I met a new listener in person at one of my breathwork classes. She said she was like looking me up after the breathwork and found my podcast and her feedback was incredible and I actually shared with her before I even recorded this. You know that the podcast was ending and she's like no, but I was like. I reminded her and I'll remind you guys, there's over over a hundred episodes I mean, I repeat a few of them but a hundred new episodes published and they're really good and I try to keep them bite size. I try to keep them entertaining.
Speaker 1:So go back and listen. You know, some of my favorite ones were when I brought on my husband. I brought him on twice, twice, twice. And then one of my mentors, brandy Fano, was a really another popular one. There's just so many good ones, so that's not going anywhere. You can still access all of that. So, yeah, I'm going to keep those episodes up for the time being. So please go back, binge, re-listen and share anything and everything that inspires you, simply from this place, of wanting to spread something not with any intention of getting anything back to spread something, not with any intention of getting anything back.
Speaker 1:So now, how did I get here? Well, I've been really transparent in sharing throughout this entire journey that podcasting can be. It can be really lonely. What I just started to really uncover that has always kind of been there I just never named it is being an entrepreneur can be really lonely doing everything on your own, and I understand that there's coaches you can hire and this and that, but nobody that I could really find was really as invested in my business as I was. And so, yeah, I mean and that was probably my own stuff to work with, but, yeah, I mean, even just saying it out loud, that was probably a big block of mine, that I just didn't trust people. But still, I'm the creator, I'm responsible for the results. It falls on me. So that's kind of what I'm talking about when I'm talking about being an entrepreneur. It's a lonely process, even if you have a team.
Speaker 1:And so the last few months I've actually had the privilege of working with a team to plan my first retreat, which is sold out. It's going to be on the East coast in October with two friends who I actually, ironically, met on social media. Huge shout out to Becky and Julie. So I have felt such a shift in launching and welcoming women into this retreat alongside a team, and so I recognized how powerful it can be to go after your dreams right.
Speaker 1:I've always wanted to host a retreat in collaboration with other women who have an aligned vision, and that there are other women who have an aligned vision that I can actually trust, that they are as invested as I am, because I had this story that my personality was too strong that it wouldn't work out, that I suck at friendships and I'm telling you guys I was so wrong because it's been. I mean, I hope Becky and Julie would say the same, but it's just been such a phenomenal yeah, whole experience where all of us are honoring each other's boundaries as best as we can. You know about, like when we can work on this and plan and all this stuff. We are also being so encouraging, so encouraging and then complete truth telling, like if somebody needs clarification or somebody wants has an opinion, like everything is really. It's just been such a cool experience and I've never once experienced doubt, which has been so new for me when it came to launching things. So I credit that really to the collaboration.
Speaker 1:But I also want to say that this team of ladies really helped bridge the gap between personal development and, for me, my faith, my spirituality with God, and I'll never forget praying. These women, becky and Julie, paused before we were about to hit, launch and officially market our retreat which, by the way, just a few days later we sold out, or a week later, I think it was crazy, but they asked to pray right before launching. You guys, in five years of having faith, being a Christian and being in the personal development, I've never once prayed. And again, I'm not calling out coaching because that could just be like a me problem Again, maybe a block, but that was something I didn't do. And I'm doing that with the retreat and I'm noticing such a huge difference when God is at the forefront of the entire process, not just when I need something or even not just when it's going well, like throughout the whole process, just continually, again sort of trusting that he's as invested in my vision as I am. And so, again, I've always had this close relationship with God but I've intentionally sort of kept my faith, I would say, toned down. Those that really know me know my faith, but I do think with my clients, in the last year, I've been a little bit more open with it by trying to include, you know, some Christian songs or book recommendations.
Speaker 1:But I'm telling you I couldn't help it when I was in the online space of like toning it down and really censoring it. Censoring myself because I didn't want to offend it, censoring myself because I didn't want to offend or turn anyone off. So oftentimes I'd catch myself calling it universe or whatever you call it. It's like, no, I believe he's called God. That's my actual belief. Can I have a conversation with someone who has a different belief? Absolutely, I've done enough work where your beliefs don't scare me, but I also don't want my beliefs to scare you. I want to be able to learn and grow from all beliefs, right. But in order to do that, you have to be rooted in your beliefs. So I found myself censoring and I always thought it was weird that I did that. But that's just what people said in the. It was like the inclusive language in personal development, right.
Speaker 1:And again, maybe even just by me saying this, maybe I'm going to lose some listeners for the future episodes. That's not coming, but that is my truth and that is what I'm choosing to share in my last episode is part of the reason I'm leaving this online world is because, despite doing all my work, despite having coaches, despite having an accountability group, I got really sucked into censoring who I really was and it wasn't working anymore. So and again, I know that you guys, whether you are even understanding what I'm saying, you know that we live in a world that says censor yourself instead of starting conflict. Conflict is bad, and so I personally am just ready to live uncensored and unfortunately, it just does not feel like. Excuse me, online, like the online space does not feel supportive for living like this anymore. It did at one point, and again I'm not blaming that, but I am recognizing that that environment brings this out in me. So I am taking responsibility, but part of that responsibility is having major boundaries with me and the online space. So I'm also ashamed to admit, but my business.
Speaker 1:Over time, it really became about the numbers. Instead of collaborating and co-creating, not just with other coaches but with God, I was leading and executing Find Her Wild coaching all by myself and it was so lonely, to the point where I was actually beginning to lose my inspiration, my why, and ultimately it felt like myself, my why and ultimately it felt like myself. I was constantly unhappy in my business and I just felt so disconnected to why. I got into this in the first place and I kind of mentioned this briefly in the beginning of this episode but I became so focused on the many right, the numbers, the projections, this, whatever. I'm not even thinking of the business term, but the amount of people and revenue and all that stuff that I wanted, the goals, you know it, it, instead of celebrating the one woman that read my post or listen to my podcast or joined my program I mean, don't get, don't get me wrong, if you're listening and you're a past client, I was always. I mean, I took time after every single because my business had always been sort of small and intimate and I really did enjoy that. I really did enjoy that.
Speaker 1:But for some reason, there was such a disconnect between what I thought I wanted and what I had and, no matter what I did, I couldn't shift it. It just always felt like not enough for me. Um, I always. It just always felt like not enough for me and or not, not, not like, not enough. Like it felt like something wasn't working because that's what the personal development space tells you. But again, I was so grateful to every woman that committed and that I had the honor to work with.
Speaker 1:But again there was this push whether it was covertly or overtly like there was this push to what's next. Like you put this out, what's next, what's next? It was like all the business coaches online were friending you and messaging you constantly because they saw you as a coach, asking you about your business. They didn't care about your business, they just were about to sell you something. I fell for that a few times in the beginning where, like I really legitimately was like this lady is so nice, helping me out.
Speaker 1:And then it was like boom, and I was like I don't want to be like that. That doesn't sit right with me. But this is the way to make a solopreneur life work. You have to create, be inspired, put out, then you lead and then, before you're even done leading, you've got to be ready to put something else out or price it at a way where you can take a break, whatever, or price it at a way where you can take a break, whatever.
Speaker 1:So I just started to feel really disconnected and I started dreading showing up, whether it was to live calls or trainings that I had promised, creating content and, honestly, just promoting any part of my business. It felt so disconnected from what I believed Because I really really still believed in the work I was teaching, especially the work that I've done specifically around marriages and, ironically, again, I'm recording this on my anniversary and just like the reminder all day of how important and sacred that relationship is. Anyways, okay, I digress, but but the other thing I think the personal development gets wrong is they will tell you. They tell you and I was probably guilty of delivering this message that whatever you desire you can have, and I believe this is true to an extent. Okay, so last month, right, I told you we started, actually more than a few months ago, we started really praying before the launch and God was like included throughout the process, when I remember yeah, it was just there was a lot of praying about certain clients that wanted to come for certain things to work out, and it was just he was at the forefront and so it brought me kind of back into his word, right, I would also say God, put a lot of God, put a lot of people in my life in the last few years Becky, julie, my best friend, liz, and I would say even some changes in my mom and my sister and some new friends. And my youngest son this last year has just been. I mean, honestly, he's been like such a disciple, just sharing so much about Jesus with me. That's like things I knew right intellectually, but it was just delivered in a way that I really believed.
Speaker 1:So I started diving more into the Bible during my time off of Instagram. And it clearly says you guys, it says if you ask, he will listen. And if you continue to read the passages that are found I'm not going to quote it, but they're found in both John and Matthew's. In Matthew he says in some version of like if it's his will, you will receive what you ask, meaning your desires must align with his will. So just because you want something, sure you can have it, but it doesn't mean you will, because the truth is maybe there's something better, maybe there's something that's not in your scope of awareness, maybe there's something you don't know.
Speaker 1:And that's one of my most frustrating complaints about the personal development world is oftentimes. I mean, I have found a few mentors that include God in their work and I have found when that's the focus, it's not so much focused on you. And so what do I mean by that? I mean, when I just looked to business coaches and just to self-development and self-growth books, I was the reason my business wasn't taking off. But the truth was I mean, in the beginning yes, I agree with that it was limiting beliefs, it was fear of rejection, it was fear of putting my story out there, and so I'm really grateful that that work was available to me. And then, at some point, it was like I kept getting these opportunities that would come into my life to sort of serve underdeveloped Teenagers was one. I had another opportunity to work with moms, another opportunity to provide free coaching, and I kept turning it down because I was so focused on what I wanted. I was so focused on my goals, my growth right Personally and business wise, that I was missing what I can now see, as I think it's almost like that story, if you guys have ever heard it.
Speaker 1:A man is drowning and God sends a boat and he says don't worry, I don't need that boat, god will save me. And so another boat comes. He says don't worry, I don't need the boat, god will save me. And the third boat same thing I don't need to get on the boat, god will save me. And he ends up drowning and he goes to heaven. He says God, why didn't you save me? And God goes I sent you three boats, you dummy.
Speaker 1:And for me, when I look back on my journey in the last just two years, there were a lot of opportunities I think he was trying to bring to me. I really do when he was saying like this might not be where I want you. Could you do it? Could you hustle? Could I actually create a successful online business by myself? Yes, and you guys can too.
Speaker 1:But just because I want something doesn't mean it's the right thing for me in the bigger picture, and that requires a deep connection spiritually, a strong level of discernment that I lost along the way. I really did, and so, in other words, over this last few months, being off of social media, reconnecting again I've always been close to God, but really reconnecting to what he actually says, and if I had been immersed in that, I think I would have had a stronger discernment a lot earlier. So, in other words. Maybe my business wasn't taking off after five years not because of anything I'm doing wrong, which is what personal development tells you and it creates a lot of shame. It's you, it's your beliefs, it's your energy right. Maybe my business wasn't taking off because he has something better for me.
Speaker 1:And that is exactly what I discovered, because as soon as I consciously made the decision to surrender doing things my way, I I opened up space, I guess is the best way to say it. I opened up space to really receive something that wasn't even on my radar and it was so much better than I could have envisioned. I felt like for the first time, I was experiencing what every business coach was telling me was available as an entrepreneur, but it was something I just was never. They weren't giving me the whole story, so meaning. In other words, when this new opportunity came to me, it was the most surrendered, relaxed, easeful process I have been in, been through in I don't know the last five years, like since I entered into this coaching space, I will say even the programs that were quote unquote successful, I was still constantly like it felt like the other shoe was going to drop at any moment, like this launch was really good, but if the next one doesn't go really well, like and it was just I couldn't ever relax and therefore experienced anything stress-free or easeful or like easy right and surrendered, and going through this journey over the last two months, it makes me sad. It makes me sad that I forgot that. And again, if you're listening and you're in the coaching space or you're thinking of getting in the coaching space, I know people that have been able to do both For me.
Speaker 1:I found it really hard to not censor myself when my presence was only online, and some of you may, listening, might see that that's really like my own personal weakness, but and I'm going to get into this in a minute I think it's social media, it's the online world. It does something to your psyche, no matter how many tools you have. And in doing that and in following self-development books and self-development gurus, I just was so focused on myself, so focused on my energy and my thoughts and my stories, and I was exhausted. I was exhausted and this last two months reminded me that I don't have to be, it doesn't have to be this never-ending merry-go-round that I just can't get off of. I can make a shift, I can make a change and while it's really freaking scary, I can completely and 100% pivot, and so can you at any time and there was no trust. Right and again, personal development says trust in yourself, trust in something bigger than yourself. That's where I think we miss it. We miss the mark.
Speaker 1:So, if I'm being honest, I would say probably since 2022, and I think I even said this in one of my podcasts like I had wanted to quit or something like that, but I had started to get the nudge of like I don't know the more entrepreneurs I talked to, like I knew what I was experiencing was the norm right, it was normal but I kept being like but do I want this normal? Like this sucks. Like I actually can't turn my brain off, you know, even though I'm in charge of my time, because I'm constantly answering messages or checking on clients, or, oh my gosh, I just got this great idea. I've got to like, figure that out. And then not even my great idea for the program. I got to figure out how to even put it out there and launch it. And God, I'm doing all this work. And what if no one signs up? And it was like this again. I know if you're listening and you're a business coach. Please don't contact me because I'm sure there are other ways, but that was all that I saw and that was my entire experience, and so it just.
Speaker 1:I do want to just briefly mention I won't go on a huge soapbox, but Instagram. I will remain on Facebook because I have a lot of high school friends and my family and you know it is just kind of it's necessary in today's world. But Instagram I am not a fan of. It is not what it once was, and it's funny because even when I go to Facebook now and I hadn't spent a lot of time on that when I was focused on my business nobody's looking at their what do you even call it? Their wall to see if it's like cohesive and color coordinated, and all that In Instagram, from the very front page of your profile picture. People make money and sell programs off of trying to teach you how to optimize your picture, your bio, the feed, your highlight bubbles, all the stuff. And it's just for what? For what? Actually? Some of my favorite coaches.
Speaker 1:I never paid attention to that, so I don't know how or why and, trust me, I really was cautious of not getting sucked into the vanity that Instagram can create and also the comparison trap. Trust me, I had alarms going off. I was so connected to my body, like I knew, when I was going down this path of comparison. But it was inevitable that's the best way I can describe it. It was inevitable and the cycle I would experience is I would take a break from Instagram because or I'm sorry so I would you know wake up, feel inspired on Instagram, showing up, showing my whole life, from like running in the morning to I, you know, I was just feeling like on fire about sharing, and it really was from this place of pure devotion, I guess, devotion to just share this work and share my heart and share my experience and share what I was learning. And then eventually it'd be like wait, shit, like I got to make money, okay, time to put something out and it went really well if I was, you know, riding the high and then became inspired. But a lot of times what happened is I started really getting nervous and focusing and like feeling lack and, yeah, just like the business part of Instagram was a lot, it's a lot to do on my own.
Speaker 1:I hadn't done, I didn't have enough resources to put together a team. Right, like I worked. I told you for the retreat because this was within that time. I was working with the team and that was really cool. I had hired a VA for a little while, but I really my personality, but I really my personality recently officially diagnosed with ADD.
Speaker 1:I need structure, I need structure and I wasn't able to provide that for myself and structure is so important. So structure and autonomy. So I don't want to be micromanaged, I don't want someone to tell me how to do things their way. I want the freedom and the autonomy and the creativity to kind of show up with my gifts. But I need to know when I'm doing what and why. And I, for whatever reason, as much as I tried time blocking and working with coaches and groups, I just I couldn't stick to it. I didn't have the accountability that I knew I craved and that my, my, who, I was designed by God. What I, what I needed, right, what I needed, and I just wasn't able to access that as a solopreneur.
Speaker 1:And on Instagram. And you guys, the last thing I'll say, I said I wasn't going to go in a soapbox, but we are just now beginning to understand the repercussions to social media, specifically Instagram. I mean I can't tell you how many big time authors, speakers, coaches are leaving this platform. They're leaving because it is messing with them, no matter if you teach this, no matter how many tools you have. I mean this is why the creators of social media do not allow their kids to be on social media. It's funny, because we don't allow social media as well. And my kids keep asking and I go all you have to do is find me one article that tells me the benefits of it, one article with scientific research to back it up, and we'll get it. And they can't find an article because it doesn't exist. So I'm not saying it's all bad. I've met amazing friends. I've met amazing mentors. I mean, I devoted five years of my life to this place, so it wasn't all bad. But there is a lot of bad.
Speaker 1:And I am getting off of the merry-go-round of going full in being really inspired and then hitting this low point and trying to put something out, and then getting burnt out and taking a break and you see everybody do it. So you start to buy into this idea that it's a normal. It's not normal. People don't go to work and have to take. They take the weekend, but they don't have to like constantly take breaks if they're taking care of themselves, if they've created a work-life balance where, you know, they do have sort of flexibility, which is something I'm creating, or, I'm sorry, I guess I should say it's something that really came and found me and it was exactly what I needed.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, I just want to mention that piece on social media, specifically on Instagram, because if you've been feeling that nudge of like I just don't think it's right for me and then you just kind of take a break and wait, I really challenge you delete the app from your phone, completely deleted. Delete it, deactivate your account, unfollow every single person on your list so that it's just so you're not, you're literally not following people, it's just people following you. But do something major. For me, it was taking it off my phone, where you can actively get some accountability, and not sign in for just two weeks and just observe, observe what happens For me. My energy came back, my creativity came back, my inspiration came back, my happiness, my joy came back and then this opportunity came into my life. So, if you've been feeling the nudge, really want to encourage you to follow it. So if you have listened thus far. Thank you.
Speaker 1:I don't even feel like I've really given you anything in this episode, except just a look into somebody who is sick of living censored and sick of living on the highs and the lows of somebody else's agenda, if you will. And I could go on and on and on about, yes, instagram, but it is psychology warfare to all of us. You're not immune to it If you have a human mind. There's nothing healthy about it. There's nothing healthy about it. It's a great networking tool, but people don't use it as a networking tool. You get really, really sucked in and so, yeah, so, without further ado, thanks again for listening.
Speaker 1:I do want to just offer anybody who's interested in what I'm doing next and where I'm going and how we can still stay connected. I want to jump into that right now. So I have been gifted an 100% remote opportunity to use both my postpartum nursing knowledge and my trauma-informed coaching knowledge to serve underprivileged and high-risk moms, which also, if you know my full story, it includes teen moms, which just feels like a very full circle moment for me. I will get to coach and support not just their physical needs but that's an aspect of it but also relational needs, emotional needs, mental needs, just to help them experience a really holistic, healthy pregnancy and then even into the postpartum period. And the best part is I don't have to go out and find these moms. I get to really just do what I think is my zone of genius, which is coaching and serving and sitting with women during vulnerable moments, and I could not think of a better role for me. I really could not.
Speaker 1:The financial freedom, the time flexibility I mean it's unmatched in the season of my life. And when the opportunity came I'll be honest, I've applied to the same company multiple times before, just sort of like oh I'm so frustrated with my job, I'm going to apply Never even got an interview. So this process, it happened all very quickly. I immediately got an interview. Like it just was very seamless, and throughout the entire time I kept praying just please give me clarity. I don't want to find this job that I love but be really scared to let go of coaching right or floor nursing. I want to be fully in and I just praying for clarity which, whatever way happens If I don't get the job, help me to feel like I'm meant to still be doing my entrepreneurship. Whatever way happens if I don't get the job, help me to feel like I'm meant to still be doing my entrepreneurship, and I will say my prayers were answered, because that's what I felt throughout this entire month-long process and I really I do believe. You know.
Speaker 1:There's, of course, going to be adjustments. I've never had to work full-time hours, I would say between floor nursing and coaching. I obviously had worked full-time hours, but they were sporadic. They were throughout the day and the evenings and the weekends. This is no evening, no weekends. I do get to set my schedule. I have a little bit of time flexibility, but working full-time is going to be an adjustment.
Speaker 1:And again, I think God has prepared me so well for the season because all of the tools that I've learned over the last five years, especially my somatic tools and my breath work. It's going to really help me be able to adjust to change. I know the process of change so well right, I even did a podcast on this. If you guys are going through change, I know to expect bumps. I know nothing's going to run smoothly. I know I'm going to feel overwhelmed and tired at first. I know it's going to be a frustrating adjustment at first for both me, my kids and my husband about what mom's new role is, and I'm here for it. I'm really I feel very prepared for it. I feel very ready. They allowed me to finish out the summer with my kids, so I'm going to start the beginning of August. Yeah, it just.
Speaker 1:It feels so right, the timing feels so right, the job feels so right, everything about it feels so right. And what I always tell my clients is the truth is. This is why I prayed for clarity. I didn't pray for, um, a specific outcome, because I didn't know what the outcome was. And the truth is, you guys, there is no right or wrong outcome in life. There's simply what feels right to you in this moment, and that's what I prayed for. Please help me feel good about the decision that either is made for me or that I have to make. Give me clarity. And it's been amazing. I've never, in all of my years of being a nurse I've been a floor nurse since 2009. So it's time for me to step out of that role. I've been a floor nurse since 2009,. So it's time for me to step out of that role.
Speaker 1:But I hope, by sharing this in all of my roles, I've never felt this much clarity, and it's just been really seamless, it's been amazing, and so, again, I'm sharing this part of my journey because I want you guys to feel inspired to, if something you're doing isn't working, be open to something new, even if you don't know what that new might look like. Just pray over and over again every morning like I'm open, I'm available. Right, my higher power is God and I would ask you, pray to your higher power, I'm available and I'm open. Please, please, help me know either that I'm on the right path now, or make it very clear to me that you want me on a different path, and you will get a sign, I promise you. So, big or small, embrace the change, you guys, and be willing to surrender your plans and your outcomes to his, because, you know, this is something I recently.
Speaker 1:We just celebrated our 16th year anniversary, and every year on our anniversary we always talk about our wedding, and there were some memorable speeches, but one of the speeches that was very memorable to me was my dad and he was talking about. He took this from the movie the Shack, if you've ever seen it, and he was talking about when. He took this from the movie the Shack, if you've ever seen it, and he was talking about when Peter walks on the water and he says and he told the story, but he said, what I really want you to hear from this is that miracles can happen, but it doesn't work without him, right, like Peter was not able to walk on the water without God, and that line it doesn't work without him has stuck with me and my husband and, I'll be honest, I sort of forgot it in this entrepreneurial space, unfortunately, and I take full responsibility for that. But stepping into this new role, is it forever? I don't know. Is it possible? I step into this role and absolutely hate it and want to come back to coaching. Maybe I'm open. I'm not doing what I usually do, which is like all or nothing. I'm never coming back. I'm never doing a podcast. This time I'm open to the seasons of life. I'm open to things changing and shifting. This feels really right for me, and so I'm trusting that I'm going to be stepping into a role that I'm going to love. I really do believe that, and I'm co-creating my life. I'm not creating it. So if he wants me somewhere else, I know that he'll help make that very clear to me. And then the last thing thank you guys so much for listening to me. This really is. I sort of wrote out like some things I wanted to share with you, but this is like truly from my heart, and the last thing I will say is, again, something I share with my clients, and it just feels really fitting that this is my last big lesson for you guys.
Speaker 1:For now, if you all are going through a big change, or maybe you're about to close one chapter and start another and it could be in a business, financial, health, relationships, whatever If you're going to go I've said this in the past If you're going to go I've said this in the past if you're going to go, go out on top, meaning don't quit or move on, whatever you're doing when you're low and hating where you are. In fact, I wouldn't trust yourself when you're low or hating your marriage, or you're hating your job. That's actually, to me, that's an indication that you get to do more work to really find, yeah, reconnect back to your why? Reconnect to what it is that you truly value. When you are finding yourself in this low season, whether it's in your relationship or in your job, that is not a time to quit and make all these big life changes. That's actually a time to go inward and really really connect spiritually and connect, reflect, reflect and realign. But get yourself in a position, you guys, where you can feel so much gratitude for where you are, who you're with, even if you know it has to end, and that's how I felt about my coaching business.
Speaker 1:Get yourself in a position where you also can feel so much gratitude for where you are, who you're with, but also remaining open to something new, and I promise you guys will find that clarity you are searching for and it'll feel so good closing that chapter. That's what I want for you guys. I don't want you to have to slam the door out of spite or out of like I can't take this anymore. I'm so burnt out. I want you to do the inner work until you get to this place of. This is what I also told a client recently.
Speaker 1:If you can bring your full self into you know, for example, this relationship, bring your full self meaning, fill yourself all the way up, get your needs met, speak your desires, all the things. Speak your truth, don't hold anything back and it's still not working. Well, then you'll have more clarity than not speaking up, not being connected to your needs or desires, holding resentment right and literally just being like I can't do this anymore and quitting. That's a lazy approach. So put in the effort to make wherever or whoever you're with fully like, go full in so that if and when it really is time to close that chapter, you can leave with your integrity still intact and knowing that you really put your whole heart into it. So, yeah, I hope that makes sense. If you're going to go go out on top, don't trust yourself when you're at the bottom or in the valley or in a winter season. That's the time to really slow things down and just stay committed to yourself. Stay committed to showing up for yourself, connecting spiritually to God, realigning with your values, all the things.
Speaker 1:And one thing I expected to feel was I guess you can call it shame or guilt, but just over how much I had invested my time, my energy and financially, like I spent tens of thousands of dollars in the personal and self-growth space. And again, no regrets. I mean I've done it all. I've done one-to-one mentorship, I've done short-term, long-term, group, in-person events, in-person retreats, online retreats, online classes, events. I have done it all. Programs, teaching programs, certification programs.
Speaker 1:And I'm so glad that's where my journey led me to, because I learned a wealth of knowledge. My life improved tremendously, and where I still ended up was it doesn't work without them. It doesn't work without them, and that was the missing piece for me was allowing myself to really like be held by my faith, instead of just like sort of this is the way I can visualize it Instead of just like holding my faith like it's a small child by the hand, as I'm, you know, walking through my entrepreneurial journey, I needed to rest in it. I needed to trust that my faith in God had me and that trust is everything. Because I feel it in this process, even though for me, it's a huge change in that I'm stepping back from coaching, but also I've been a bedside nurse since 2009. So almost like 15 years I've been a bedside nurse and I will no longer be doing that and just working full time. Now. My kids have only been used to their dad getting up and working every day, and so it's just going to be a change.
Speaker 1:Right, and we just already talked about changes, but I am so excited for it and I feel so in my element stepping into this role, especially just even as I'm talking, there was just so many little things sort of along the way that really set me up to be where I am today, and it feels amazing. It feels absolutely amazing and I want that for you. So if I could leave you, holy moly I cannot believe how long I've recorded this. This is my longest solo episode, but I had a lot to say and if I could leave you with some more wisdom, or one more piece of wisdom, it really would be that it would be trust in something bigger than yourself and trust that your desires are sort of that pool, that thread between something bigger and you and align to it. When you align to it, it's as if he's pulling you along instead of you behind the desire pushing it along. Right, it's just this easeful process and I want that for each of you.
Speaker 1:But you have to first be first of all, praying. This is something me and my sister have been talking about a lot lately, like how do we actually pray? You don't pray for the thing, because that means that you are trying to still control the outcome and the thing right. We can have goals, all of that. That's fine, but really you want to pray for the feeling that you want to experience. Do you want to experience clarity? Do you want to experience peace? When I talk about launching my retreat, that's what we prayed for. We prayed for whoever was meant to be there that they would be there without incident and that we would experience peace throughout the process, when it came to this job, even when it came to my house, which I know a past guest said are you ever going to tell the story of your house?
Speaker 1:The short story is, I did the same process. I got super, super sick of living in the gray, of sometimes I love my house, sometimes I want to move and I really wanted clarity. I wanted like a decision made because living in the gray was just not working anymore. So I got really crystal clear on what I wanted and how I wanted to feel and I asked God to please make it very clear, make it very clear if I'm supposed to experience that in this house, my old house, or if there's something else. And I just want clarity. It was the exact same thing. You guys, that's the story. And the next day I got it want clarity. It was the exact same thing, you guys, that's the story. And the next day I got it. I mean it was the perfect house I could have. Never I did envision this house and it was like taken from my mind, literally manifested, like I'm not kidding you when I say that, but anyways, and it's the same for the job.
Speaker 1:I never dreamt up this job, but I did say, god, it would be so cool if I could work with, if I could use all of my story, right with addiction, the autonomy to be creative and use my these last five years for good. Use what you've gifted me, use my gifts to serve people. And that was what I said. You know somewhere, something along the lines, and that's the prayer I want to offer you. Like God, this is, this is where I'm at today. This is how I want to feel in the future. Would you make it abundantly clear if that means I stay or I go, or in a relationship, I want to stop getting on and off, this merry-go-round. I just want to feel peace and joy with the person I'm with. Would you make it abundantly clear, would you help me to close one door so that I'll actually see the open door that you've laid out in front of me? And yeah, that's. That's ultimately what I did with this new opportunity and I'm so excited.
Speaker 1:I am really sad to to leave the space. I'm really sad to leave you guys. But one thing I want to let you know if you are still interested. Going forward again, I'm not marketing it online, so it will all be word of mouth Occasionally. If you're on my email list, we'll stay connected that way and, like I said, this podcast platform will continue to be up so you can come back and binge listen and so if I feel inspired along the way, this is where I will come. I am deactivating Instagram I shouldn't say deactivate. I'm still sitting on that one mostly because I have just incredible montage videos of my family and all that. But it is not something I will partake in anymore going forward at this season of my life and I'm so at peace with that.
Speaker 1:But if you are wanting to receive coaching specifically when it comes to creating intimacy in either your friendships, your family, your marriage, your kids, like intimacy is really. It's the connection we all crave. It's the connection where we can be fully seen and we can fully see the other person and we both get our needs met and it just feels really, really good. That's been my journey. I mean, if I could sum it up, it's been learning to connect deeper to myself so that I could ultimately connect with other people.
Speaker 1:And yeah, so I'm still doing one-to-one clients. I'm still taking on one-to-one clients and we will custom make a package for you. Obviously, like I said in the beginning, the calls will all be on the weekends or in the evenings, which might work a lot better for you guys. So if we've worked together in the past, or if you are just now finding this and you're like, oh wow, I am still in love with this work, nothing about anything I've said here has to do with the work. I still believe the work is exactly what we're here to do and unpack and learn by design. I just think many personal development gurus are leaving out a big piece, they're leaving out the creator when they're talking about this is how you can create your dream life, and to me it just doesn't make sense anymore. So all that to say yes, I'm taking one-to-one clients.
Speaker 1:You can email me. I think you can even comment here on the podcast and I'll check every now and then, but email is probably the best way. I will put it in my show notes and if you are local, I will be hosting in-person breath work. I have two studios right now, that I will be doing that on a monthly basis, and then we have our retreat in October and I'm open. I'm open to leading another retreat, I'm open to leading multiple new retreats, and so we'll just sort of see where life takes us.
Speaker 1:But stay connected with me. Get on my email list now if you really want to be in the know of any upcoming events or opportunities to really connect. I love you, I'm sending you guys so much love, and my biggest prayer is that one of these episodes, or a part of one of these episodes whether it was about our body and connecting to yourself, connecting to others and relationships, friendships, marriages, parenting, all the things or connecting to your purpose right, we covered all of it here, and so I really my biggest prayer has always been that you'll take a piece of what it is that your heart really needs so that you can truly wake up and truly, truly in your life, completely thrive.