Dr. Tami: Boozhoo (Hello). This is Dr. Tami, your host of PsychologistSay…, a podcast where I talk about the psychology of everyday living. Welcome to our new listeners, and if you're a returning listener, thanks for supporting us.
Dr. Tami: Today we're going to be talking about gratitude and how to keep a gratitude journal. So gratitude is where you're focusing on something that's valuable in your life, something that's meaningful, something that you're just really thankful for. It's a deep, deep appreciation for things in life, every level. And when we focus on our gratitude, it can really shift our emotion because our brain is not trained to focus daily on the gratitude. We don't wake up and say, oh, I'm so happy I'm awake, that the sun is out like it should be, that the birds are chirping, that I'm breathing. Most of the time, people can wake up, and then we're hit with, oh, it's cold, it's dark, I'm tired. This alarm clock is buzzing. Oh, my gosh, I have so much to do today. I don't want to get out of bed. Okay, so that was a good example of how many people kind of struggle in the morning. And wherever you're struggling, our mind tends to focus on the negative of what's going on in life. And that doesn't make us bad people. It's just the way that things have been working out for us. Our brain is really trying to remember things that it doesn't like. And so keeping a gratitude journal is one way to start to track. It's an exercise. So it's not just telling yourself, oh, I'm grateful for this, or, oh, yeah, be grateful. It's actually sitting down for a minute or two and taking some time to really almost document and really put some effort into your gratitude and describe what it is. And so I think the first way to start doing this is to get yourself a notebook or some postits or on your phone, whatever you feel like you can do to keep track of this. And it has to be something that you enjoy and something that you would use and do again. So make sure you think about your personality, make it fit. A good recommendation is because we tend to not focus on everything that we're grateful for. You'd want to start off with first, just starting to make a list of everything that you can think of and break it down. Some of the big things, all the way down to some of the really little things that are maybe big things, but that you take for granted or you don't think of them as something that to be grateful for. A lot of times in life, we end up missing out on gratitude because we expect something to be there or we take it for granted that it's there, how easy it is to shift. Now, when you're listening, I want you to just start to even think of what are some things day to day that you're missing on your gratitude, when you're in a really difficult mood or you're angry or things aren't going your way, stressed. Especially now with COVID there's a lot of high stress, and it's time to really start saying, well, how do I turn things around? Especially when everything isn't turning around for me. People are not doing this for me. Things maybe are not getting much better or at a rate that we would have hoped. And so it's time to shift. How do we do that? And then, so I also think if you're having a really good day, that's a good day to start making this list because the list is going to flow so much easier. It's one of those days where you just know, you wake up and you're feeling good, you have good energy, you can think about things in a positive way, you're feeling connected, you're smiling. Those are really good days to start your word list and keep adding to that word list because there will be days when you want to be grateful. And, boy, it could be tough. That voice in your head could be really focusing on feeling like, no, things aren't going right. Maybe feeling a bit like the victim in a situation, feeling alone, misunderstood these things. We have days like this, so it's really important to look and look for these notes on days when we were feeling good. And so when you get this list, then each night, one to three nights out of the week, and the more often, the better. It's just starting to write down one thing that you're grateful for and go into a little more detail. So the more you dive into one thing, the bigger it'll be for you. For example, you have food on your table, okay, that I got to eat today. I didn't experience hunger. And then to really elaborate on that idea of what does it feel like to feel hunger and not being able to satisfy that and I'm able to satisfy my hunger and feed. How grateful, how much do I appreciate that? So that day, just focusing on that one thing in your life can be enough to start to change your mindset. So in your journal, you start to take these deeper dives into these areas and, like I said, they can be big areas like I'm grateful that I have my kids or I'm grateful that I have my job. And it could be these areas where smaller, maybe for some people, I'm grateful I can afford my stylist or my haircut from the salon. Wherever you start to whatever is in your life, whatever is considered bigger. Lists of gratitude are smaller. It's all personalized to you. And then look at an intention. What do you want to set your intention for that day? And you don't have to feel like you have to get too technical with anything. This isn't a competition. This isn't a race. This isn't a sign of how well you can stick to a program. This is a tool that you could use. And the more that you look at it and set it up and do your best to be consistent, the more that it can benefit you. It's not going to hurt anybody if you don't do it, but it's not going to hurt you if you do do it. So if you're starting to do it and it feels good and it's working, then you're more likely to keep doing it. And hopefully that you start to see that change in your mood. That's all that I have for today. I'm so grateful for you guys for checking in. I even feel better just talking about this gratitude journal. But I'm definitely going to take a minute tonight and write down just one thing that I feel so grateful for because I could use a boost in feeling optimistic right now, and I'm sure that we all can. So thanks for checking in.
P. S. Life can be really difficult and it can be easy to look at what's not going our way yet. Looking at the gratitude and doing some work can really help us focus on what really matters in life. Thanks for checking in.
