EP109: How To Maximize Productivity and Parenting

Interview with George Grombacher / Founder of the LifeBlood podcast, Father of Three

HOSTED BY PAUL SULLIVAN

Success usually begets more obligations to fit on top of what you're already doing - without more time to do them. That happened to George Grombacher, who was a financial adviser when he launched Lifeblood, a podcast that delves into health, wealth, relationships, work and life. It took off and was airing daily. He's adding another podcast; he just wrote a book called The Purpose Book. But he's also a father of three, married to a working mom and getting daily exercise. How's he do it? No secret formula. Listen in to learn what you can change.

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Transcript

00;00;06;07 - 00;00;27;00
Paul Sullivan
Welcome to the Company of Dads podcast, where we explore the sweet, silly, strange, and sublime aspects of being a lead D&D in a world where men are the go to parent, aren't always accepted at work, among their friends or in the community or what they're doing. I'm your host, Paul Sullivan. Our podcast is just one of the many things we produce each week at the Company of Dads.

00;00;27;00 - 00;00;49;00
Paul Sullivan
We have various features, including the leader of the week. We have our monthly meetups. We have a new resource library for all dads. The one stop shop for all of this is our newsletter. The Dad. So sign up today at the Company of dads.com backslash. The dad. Today our guest is George Grombacher , a man whose interest defy easy categorization.

00;00;49;02 - 00;01;10;28
Paul Sullivan
He's a financial advisor, for sure, running financial consulting professionals and being named a top advisor in the US. He's an author. One of his books is called The Purpose Book. He's the host of Life Blood, a podcast that airs every day and delves into health, wealth, relationships, work and life. I was a guest on it years ago when I was the Wealth Matters columnist at the New York Times.

00;01;10;29 - 00;01;33;03
Paul Sullivan
He's launching another podcast now called Align Money, which will get him back to where he started with lifeblood before it became so expansive. He's a man who lives with intentionality and helps others do the same. I reach back out to him when I got a message featuring baby wearing avocados, which took me back to those highly scheduled days of newborn dove.

00;01;33;05 - 00;01;45;10
Paul Sullivan
Turns out that's a six month old. He also has two boys who are four and seven now. I'm really happy that George back with us today. Welcome, George, to the Company Dads podcast.

00;01;45;13 - 00;01;47;15
George Grombacher 
Well, hey, Paul, thanks for having me.

00;01;47;17 - 00;01;54;28
Paul Sullivan
You've been busy, man. How have you been? Give me the highlights. Give me the. Give me. Give me the post-Covid highlights of George's plan.

00;01;55;00 - 00;02;14;23
George Grombacher 
So? So we are in a post-Covid world. We've we we can all agree on that that that we're moving past that. I am highly scheduled. Highly scheduled. You took the words right out of my mouth when talking about the baby. Yeah, but life is good, man. I am in a fortunate place where I get to pursue my interests.

00;02;14;25 - 00;02;28;28
George Grombacher 
So I get to do work that I think matters, and I get to do it every day, and I get to cart kids around and clean avocado off baby's faces and and kind of everything else. So one of the things good we.

00;02;28;28 - 00;02;42;21
Paul Sullivan
Realized, you know, when our first daughter was, was young. Second, our huge avocado lovers, we had Labradors. If you have a Labrador, they can do. They really love to help out, you know, clean up avocados. It's it's in the wheelhouse.

00;02;42;24 - 00;02;54;09
George Grombacher 
I will let my wife know that she's not a dog fan, which is sad because I think everybody else would really like to have dog around. So I will let her know about the the avocado clean up feature.

00;02;54;15 - 00;03;17;04
Paul Sullivan
Everything. You know, the little puffs that fall on the floor. A Labrador. The good. Highly scheduled. We talk a lot at the Company of Dads, about how the dads, working moms, families in general, how, you know, the more they can see what the other person is doing, the better things turn out. Simple thing that we advocate for is really opened and shared calendars.

00;03;17;04 - 00;03;28;04
Paul Sullivan
Not anything super complicated, but as you know, as we know, people sometimes don't even do the simple stuff. What's your calendar look like? The color code.

00;03;28;06 - 00;03;48;16
George Grombacher 
I do not color code it. I've got a lot of recurring meetings on there, but it's all the same color. My wife sends me color coded stuff. And I don't mean to to sort of answer a different question, than you ask me, but I couldn't agree more. My wife and I have recently started just a business meeting.

00;03;48;16 - 00;04;10;08
George Grombacher 
We do it on Sunday mornings after the avocado avocado covered baby goes down for her first nap, and we just get on the same page with calendars. Sort of, a previous business, new business, kind of a meeting just to get on the same page because it's easy to start feeling resentful that I'm doing everything. And what is she doing?

00;04;10;08 - 00;04;12;25
George Grombacher 
And vice versa. So it's really important.

00;04;12;28 - 00;04;34;16
Paul Sullivan
One of the things we talk about at the company dads is the, again, highly complicated but very simple thing called the paper test. And we tell couples, if you just sit down together Sunday afternoon with a baby sleeping, that's a good time. Saturday afternoon, not in a moment of an extreme. It's not in a moment after you just had a fight, yelling and screaming about what you do and write down separately on a piece of paper, what do you do?

00;04;34;21 - 00;04;54;15
Paul Sullivan
You know, what? What do you do? And what do I do? And then you both do the same thing. And what we always guarantee is that what you think you do and what you think your partner does are going to be very different. And it's the moment to start having that, you know, that conversation and having it and bringing some sort of understanding as opposed to as, you know, all of us, you know, kids work, it's stressful.

00;04;54;15 - 00;05;20;07
Paul Sullivan
You start yelling at each other and it doesn't solve anything. Let's talk a little bit more about time. From that intro from just, you know, looking at all you've been doing, particularly since we last spoke, you know, 4 or 5 years ago. You do a lot, all the time. How do you manage all of that while still being a husband and a father and, and, you know, non dog owning human.

00;05;20;10 - 00;05;39;20
George Grombacher 
I really think I could easily fit a dog in. It's probably hubris and and wildly stupid, but, I don't know what's first, but I do wake up very, very early in the morning. Right now, I wake up at 415 every day and I start my day. So I get in my exercise and stretching and all that stuff.

00;05;39;23 - 00;06;07;15
George Grombacher 
And then I usually record an episode of the podcast at 6 a.m., most, most days of the week. Not that are not the weekends. So that's sort of the short answer to that question. But I also, at this point in my career, I've been a financial guy for, you know, 20 some years start in 2001. So I have a decently firm handle on what needs to be done in order to get the results that I want there, and so I need to get everything done.

00;06;07;15 - 00;06;19;07
George Grombacher 
I just don't I know that I need to wake up a little earlier than maybe I would like, so I don't know how long I'm going to be able to do that. But, I've been doing it for as long as the kids have been, as long as the kids have been alive.

00;06;19;10 - 00;06;21;24
Paul Sullivan
So what time? What time do you go to bed at night?

00;06;21;26 - 00;06;27;24
George Grombacher 
I try to be in bed for at least eight hours. So in bed by about 815. Hopefully.

00;06;27;26 - 00;06;43;06
Paul Sullivan
Wow. Walk. I walk me through, you know, walk me through a day. You give me what? You know, because you do. You fit so much in. But look, we all have the same 24 hours in a day. You seem to be maximizing it. So walk me through that. You're up at 415. You're doing your exercise, that you're stretching.

00;06;43;08 - 00;06;57;15
Paul Sullivan
You record a podcast at 6 a.m., you know your time, which is a little wonky because for people who don't know, you're in Phoenix, which doesn't believe in daylight savings. So sometimes you're three hours behind these go, sometimes two hours, whatever. What's what's your day look like?

00;06;57;17 - 00;07;26;04
George Grombacher 
Yeah. So record the episode. It's edited and done by 645. So my shows are 20 minutes. So pretty short and sweet. Edited and done 645 I then leave my office and start preparing the children to get out the door, which my wife has already been working on some aspect of that. So we can get the kids up out the door between 715 and 730, dropping them off wherever they need to go.

00;07;26;04 - 00;07;52;10
George Grombacher 
And then we're both starting our respective days. My wife is a full time professional. And I usually try to start my day at a coffee shop of some kind and, right for at least 45 minutes, if I'm able. So I love doing that. That's a habit I got back into. I liked writing a lot when I was a young person in school, and then just professional life beat that out of me.

00;07;52;10 - 00;08;10;24
George Grombacher 
But I found it again probably when I was, 45 years old. That's 6 or 7 years ago. I read, The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. She talked about the morning pages, which you're probably familiar with. So I'll do that. And then it's just the business of financial services and whatever else kind of needs to get done.

00;08;10;24 - 00;08;26;10
George Grombacher 
It's client meetings or service work, stuff like that. New business development and sprinkle in, try to get to the gym twice a week if I'm able to do that. And, you know, food and just regular stuff from there.

00;08;26;15 - 00;08;28;29
Paul Sullivan
What time do you and your work day?

00;08;29;01 - 00;08;31;20
George Grombacher 
About 230 is when I'm done.

00;08;31;22 - 00;08;35;22
Paul Sullivan
Really? Yep. And what do you do from 230 to 815 when.

00;08;35;22 - 00;09;04;18
George Grombacher 
You go good, I then I, I am in charge of picking up the kids because my wife has a traditional corporate job. So I usually will pick up kids starting at three. And then we go to different activities. As all parents are aware of soccer or jujitsu or gymnastics or tennis or whatever, and home and running a couple errands, making dinner, and then it's dishes and laundry and just the household kind of stuff.

00;09;04;20 - 00;09;22;11
George Grombacher 
My wife gets home, usually between 545 and 615, and try to spend some quality time together as a family during that time. And, then it's get kids ready for bed and get myself ready for bed.

00;09;22;13 - 00;09;41;14
Paul Sullivan
Usually, dad, man, you are the definition of a lead that we define as the go to parent. Whether he works full time, part time, or devotes all of us time to his family and in many cases supporting his spouse or partner in their careers. This is awesome. Do you have at work at financial, consulting? Professor of leverage.

00;09;41;17 - 00;09;46;03
Paul Sullivan
Do you have people who are helping you out on on the client stuff or how does that work?

00;09;46;05 - 00;10;10;05
George Grombacher 
Yeah, yeah, I've got a team of people. So I, I run, a financial firm. We do 41K plans for companies, and then I run a financial wellness company, which is very, very similar, but a different company. Essentially just trying to help people get better at money. Yeah. That's the mission of of both the groups. And, so I have support from a professional standpoint.

00;10;10;05 - 00;10;11;04
George Grombacher 
Certainly.

00;10;11;07 - 00;10;37;11
Paul Sullivan
Yeah. And, you know, for many of us, you know, delegating is is difficult. Yeah. You you want to do it. And it really takes, a great manager and involved person to say, okay, you're going to do it your way. It's different than how I would do it, but it's going to be fine. Is that a skill that you you knew that you had innately, or is that a learned skill that you learned how to delegate?

00;10;37;11 - 00;10;41;17
Paul Sullivan
So you could really me to maximize your days in your life?

00;10;41;19 - 00;11;08;12
George Grombacher 
I don't know if I've ever sat down and thought which of my many, many skills are I heard Nate. Some probably are, but I am very much a proponent of, you know, if I want to get good at something, I need to learn how to do it. And so I'm a big fan of of learning best practices or just whatever it is I want to start playing pickleball or whatever.

00;11;08;12 - 00;11;30;02
George Grombacher 
I need to learn how to do it. And then I know that I'm going to get a lot better, over time. So very much, and delegation, that's a really, really, really, really hard thing, especially as a person who is a doer. I am a I'm fond of saying that my spirit animal is a beaver because you could throw a beaver on Broadway or in Times Square, it's going to start building dams.

00;11;30;02 - 00;11;43;21
George Grombacher 
And, you know, I, I just do, you know, there's a lot of talk about being a human being. And maybe one day I'll get there for the time being, I'm a human doing. So. The answer to question is no. These are all very learned.

00;11;43;23 - 00;12;04;27
Paul Sullivan
The your your first career, your first business. It was working in financial services. Is that correct? Yep. So you know like most of us, we have varied interests and we're fortunate enough to be able to pursue our interests to either, you know, professionally, personally, they sort of accrete, and it's one and more and two and three and four and five.

00;12;04;27 - 00;12;23;29
Paul Sullivan
And so you didn't start out, this busy, you started out trying to break into financial services, start, start firm. And but those people in for our case and everything else comes from there. Then you get married, then you throw in, some kids, probably, you know why you don't have the dog, but I know that's going to come after this podcast.

00;12;24;01 - 00;12;24;21
George Grombacher 


00;12;24;23 - 00;12;45;17
Paul Sullivan
And but when you look back at it now, it's an abundant life, but it's a life that surely requires, a lot of tending to, to be more than a skeptic. A lot, a lot of management. How has that, you know, how have you been able to do that while still being, you know, we all need to make money.

00;12;45;17 - 00;12;54;27
Paul Sullivan
But, you know, if you're not a good husband and you're not a good father, that's the root unhappiness. How have you, you know, managed to add and and integrate at the same time?

00;12;55;00 - 00;13;18;11
George Grombacher 
I've, certainly come to appreciate that we all go through different seasons of life. When I was, you know, 12 years old, I wanted to be the best tennis player that I possibly could be. And so that's what I focused all of my energy and attention on. When I, I graduated from college, I really had no idea what I wanted to do, but I wanted to be successful.

00;13;18;11 - 00;13;47;12
George Grombacher 
I wanted to be respected, and frankly, I wanted to meet women. And so I found a career in financial services that allowed me to dress, respectively, make a lot of money, and gave me free time to be able to be very, very social. And I did that until I was about 28 years old. And then I made a bit of a career pivot into a management role as opposed to being a producer.

00;13;47;14 - 00;14;11;25
George Grombacher 
Did that for six years. Met my now wife during that time. And the next stage of of of of my life moved from chasing women to having a deeper understanding of what I wanted to do professionally. So I pursued that for a number of years. And then my wife and I started our family. And now at this point, that was seven years ago, which is surprising to say that out loud.

00;14;11;27 - 00;14;36;11
George Grombacher 
But my priorities have totally shifted. And, you know, turning 40 and now 45 years old, that just hastens you. You have a deeper appreciation. I have always intellectually understood that you know, I don't have a lot of time, and none of us do, and I don't have time to waste. But when these things start happening and along the line as well, 2020, when Covid was just started, my brother passed away, who was three years old than I am.

00;14;36;11 - 00;15;04;11
George Grombacher 
So you sort of realize through the birth and the death of loved ones that you're more that you're very mortal. And I still, I, I don't know if I'm more driven than other people. I assume that I am, I just know that I'm a driven person, and I've got a lot of things I want to do, and it's just made me more ruthless with how I decide to allocate my most valuable resources and how I want to be spending my time.

00;15;04;14 - 00;15;24;05
George Grombacher 
And that's a silver lining from Covid, for sure, is that, you know, you're not traveling around or driving around wherever, whatever city you're in to have coffee with, with people every morning. Just stop doing that because I couldn't do it anymore. So I have a deeper appreciation for just how to allocate my time, my attention, my time, my energy.

00;15;24;07 - 00;15;43;02
Paul Sullivan
You know, listen to that. I'm rethinking my recommendation on the dog. I don't I don't think you should get a Labrador. I think you should get a border collie, because a border collie like your kids won't get away. Like if your kids are out in the backyard, the border collie will herd your children like they're sheep and a Labrador will not.

00;15;43;02 - 00;15;52;18
Paul Sullivan
A Labrador will eat all their food. And so I just think time management, what's the purpose book about?

00;15;52;20 - 00;16;19;09
George Grombacher 
The purpose book is it's designed to, as I dug, dug into what makes for a good life. How do I live? How do I live in examined life? How do I become the person that I really want to be? How do I live the life that I really want to have, that I really want to live? So it's not lost on me that, that's a pretty audacious title for a book to write.

00;16;19;09 - 00;16;43;13
George Grombacher 
The purpose book. But it is what it is. So it's, it's I do not like when people say, just do it or fake it till you make it these nice platitudes to say, you know, just go ahead and make that happen. Well, if somebody doesn't know how to do it, then they can't just do it. So I wanted to help people and lifeblood, my podcast is really kind of a how to show.

00;16;43;15 - 00;17;06;09
George Grombacher 
It's how to do whatever it is that you're interested in doing. And the whole idea is, how can I incrementally get a little bit better so I get closer to life that I want? So my premises or thesis is that, you know, purpose is it's really why we do what we do. Goals are what we want. Our beliefs are who we are and their habits are how we do all of it.

00;17;06;12 - 00;17;24;23
George Grombacher 
And how do I line all those up as close as I possibly can? And if I'm able to do that, I think I've really positioned myself to get the life that I want. Obviously, I don't have control over much of it, but I do have control over those things and being thoughtful and contemplative about those kinds of things.

00;17;24;25 - 00;17;31;02
Paul Sullivan
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say, you're not a guy who makes a lot of excuses. Is that fair?

00;17;31;04 - 00;17;36;01
George Grombacher 
There's certainly reasons for why things don't happen, but I sure try not to make too many excuses.

00;17;36;03 - 00;17;53;28
Paul Sullivan
What do you think? Hold people back. You know, particularly we're talking about that here. I'm sure it applies to moms and dads, but what do you think? Hold back, you know, dads, from having that purposeful life, from doing what they really wish they could do or hope they could do or set out to do?

00;17;54;00 - 00;18;21;05
George Grombacher 
Yeah, there's a lot of terrible quotes about majority of men lives live of lives of quiet desperation. And I think that we're pulled along by assumptions and expectations, and I'm living on somebody else's terms. And I've got a honeydew list that's a mile long, and I've got to do this, or my family's going to be mad at me, or my wife, or my parents, or my in-laws or this, that and the other thing, and I totally get it.

00;18;21;08 - 00;18;49;16
George Grombacher 
And then, you know, a lot of us are sort of in the red and we're behind the eight ball when it comes to our finances. And that really limits our ability to follow our bliss or whatever silly term you're interested in using. So it's all that stuff. And if we're not in the habit of if we don't have habits of, of living the way that we want, well then we're not going to be doing it.

00;18;49;18 - 00;19;12;29
George Grombacher 
Then we're just sort of, you know, look the the tail on the Labrador border collie is way is wagging the animal versus the animal wagging the tail. So you referred to me as an intentional person and perhaps that is, the lack of intention is, is one of the main things that stops people from doing what they want.

00;19;13;02 - 00;19;38;03
Paul Sullivan
You know, we all know, that it's a lot easier to stay in shape than it is to lose weight and get back into shape. If people are focused and intentional and they go, they drive their life. They they're making choices. But if people stray from that path and they lose that intentionality, they lose that focus. But they're craving the purpose.

00;19;38;05 - 00;19;48;09
Paul Sullivan
You know what? Or 2 or 3 things that you would advise them to start with, to get back to that purpose driven life that they want.

00;19;48;12 - 00;20;14;16
George Grombacher 
And all this sounds easy and does hard. All this does. And again, I don't want to give platitudes out, but the only way to live how you want is to know how you want to live. So I've known the importance of goal setting since I was probably a ten year old boy. It took me to I was 35 to do it though, so in a very human move, I had this knowledge in my head but didn't do it for 25 years.

00;20;14;16 - 00;20;37;19
George Grombacher 
So now I've been setting goals for ten years, so I understand everybody was right. The verdict is in you should think and write about or you should know what it is that you want, and then make plans for bringing that desired future into your current reality. And then you work to execute on that. So yeah, in an object in motion, it's easier to keep in motion, object and rest kind of a thing.

00;20;37;22 - 00;21;05;16
George Grombacher 
And yep. Is it it's really hard to drop 30 pounds. It's a lot easier to drop 5 pounds when you kind of nip it in the butt a little bit. So first and foremost, you got to know what you want. And goal setting. It's a bad term because nobody does it so clearly there's there's the the big goals out there who whoever's responsible for for pushing goals needs to sort of do a refresh on the branding.

00;21;05;19 - 00;21;19;02
George Grombacher 
But just think about what what it is you want. How would you like to be spending your days a week day? What would a perfect day look like? Just I'm not saying it's possible, but maybe we can get a little closer to it. How would you like to start your day? What time? What would you like to do?

00;21;19;02 - 00;21;38;26
George Grombacher 
How would you like to end your day? Maybe focus on on the beginning and then the end. Get super clear on that. And then we have to remind ourselves. So I have to remind myself of what it is that animates this behavior. What is it that's driving me to wake up at 4:00 in the frickin morning? Because I don't want to.

00;21;38;29 - 00;22;06;09
George Grombacher 
Never do. I like when my alarm goes off at four, I'm like, oh, great. No, it's super painful. I dislike it immensely, but I just remind myself so around my neck, I think this is a super practical thing. I'm going to screw up my whole microphone here. I've got I've got a skull and this is, Memento Mori, which is a reminder that we're all going to die.

00;22;06;11 - 00;22;35;24
George Grombacher 
Yep. So it's a reminder of that. I've got a cross which is emblematic of of Christ, but also of my brother. And it reminds me that I owe there are a lot of people who have come before me that are no longer here, that had paved the way for the life that I have, but my ability to pursue it and that directly, that my brother died when he was my age, essentially.

00;22;35;26 - 00;22;58;13
George Grombacher 
And it drives me to get up and to do my work and to do uncomfortable things every day, because I want to honor the memory of those people who came before me, or people who just can't do what I have the ability to do. And then finally there's a key on there, which is emblematic of my work and how important my work is to me and the impact I'm interested in having.

00;22;58;16 - 00;23;16;07
George Grombacher 
And I wear these. It's kind of like we have a wedding ring. It's a reminder. Yeah, I put it on, I touch it, I feel it, and I remind myself because it's easy for me to forget, right? In fact, I do it all the time. So I have to remind myself, and those things do the trick for me.

00;23;16;09 - 00;23;19;25
George Grombacher 
And I think potentially it could help somebody else, too.

00;23;19;27 - 00;23;33;25
Paul Sullivan
George Graham Baker, thank you so much for being my guest today on the Company Dads Podcast. One final, light question what's your favorite thing to do? Your kit.

00;23;33;27 - 00;23;38;22
George Grombacher 
Go to the zoo. I love going to the zoo with them. So my.

00;23;38;24 - 00;23;41;20
Paul Sullivan
Favorite animal.

00;23;41;23 - 00;24;01;19
George Grombacher 
There are spider monkey enclosure where you can sort of get in and and there's a, there's two doors so the monkeys can escape, but they're these little mystical, little mythical, wonderful little creatures, and you can see them crawling around all over the place. So that's one of our favorite things to do for sure.

00;24;01;22 - 00;24;36;04
Paul Sullivan
Great place to end. Thank you again, George. If thoroughly enjoyed, talking to you again and have any of my guests on the Company Dads podcast. Thank you. Thank you for listening to the Company Dad podcast. I also want to thank the people who make this podcast and everything else that we do. The company that possible, Helder Moura, who is our audio producer, Lindsay Decker, and is all of our social media, Terry Brennan, who's helping us with the newsletter and audience acquisition, Emily Servin, who is our web maestro, and of course, Evan Roosevelt, who is working side by side with me.

00;24;36;04 - 00;24;53;23
Paul Sullivan
And many of the things that we do here at the Company of Dads. It's a great team. And we're just trying to bring you the best in fatherhood. Remember, the one stop shop for everything is our newsletter, the dad. Sign up at the Company of dads.com backslash. The dad. Thank you again for listening.