Two Headed Woman and Tipping Dilemmas (Guest: The Daily BM)

In this episode "Two Headed Woman and Tipping Dilemmas" on Whiskey'd & Uncensored, Eddie invites the guys from The Daily BM podcast as guests. They first delve into the intriguing world of two-headed female,  entertainment purposes only people. The conversation then shifts to the modern-day tipping dilemma, exploring when tipping is appropriate and the cultural factors influencing tipping norms. Listeners can expect a thought-provoking discussion on the complexities of entertainment and exploitation, as well as evolving dynamics of tipping etiquette in today's world.

IG Socials:
Whiskey'd and Uncensored = @whiskeydanduncensored
Eddie Lopez - @shreddindirtymtb

Buy us a Shot!
buymeacoffee.com/whiskuncensored

Subscribe to our newsletter:
http://whiskeydanduncensored.com/newsletter-socialmedia

Submit a review to the cast! Helps us in the rankings, thanks so much for your support!
    
 Our affiliate partners and their discounted links:

Pink Cherry
Early Black Friday Extra 30% Off Sitewide Code: BLACK

Adam & Eve:
 You deserve it. Take 50% off one item + Free US Shipping on $49+ 
 Coupon Code: Erotica
https://www.pntra.com/t/3-234489-285855-107783

Barbell Apparel:
Free Shipping on orders more than $99.

Fox Racing:
Enjoy Free Shipping on Orders Over $99. Only at FoxRacing.com!

MeUndies:
Get 20% off your first order and free standard shipping at MeUndies.com
 Coupon Code: MEFAM20
 https://www.pntrs.com/t/3-288152-285855-164550

My Sensual Secrets
Take $10 Off Your $40 Purchase at MySensualSecrets.com!
 Coupon Code: SECRET10D
 https://www.pjtra.com/t/3-174514-285855-141374

Transcript

0:00

What's going on guys? Welcome back to another episode of Wied and Uncensored. My name is Eddie Lopez, and I'm gonna be the host of this debauchery. Today we bring back the crew that does not follow international laws when on radio stations, these fuckers cannot follow laws rules. But anyways, I got the guys from the daily BM minus one who is potentially on his deathbed, which is sad, but unfortunately Eric is not gonna be with us today. So I have. Mike and Brad with me. What's going on fellas? What's happening? What's up man? Dicks and pussies dicks and pussies. We love talking about dicks vaginas. dicks vaginas. He said dicks and pussies. I was trying to keep it clean. Eddie's show, but you know, whatever. He literally said, fuck. Like, when is clean? Fuck. So did he say fuck? Yeah. Yes he did. Yeah. Well, lemme start off this show with real something. That's a tradition. Listen, fuck you, Mike. Oh, there you go. Yeah, no, the uh, I'm out. When, when you guys did that, that overseas episode and it was, it was going well. It was, it was kind of hard cuz it seemed like he had you guys on a weird echo like deal. But Yeah. Listening to, uh, when, when Eric just busted out, I was like, oh, these guys are gonna get fined somehow. No, I said this, this is the wrong thing to bring some Polk County guys to go on an overseas network. Um, and just bust out with the B word Eddie. You don't understand. For like two weeks prior to the show, like the minute Brad found out we're gonna be alive on the air. Eddie was coaching. Oh no, Eddie, uh, Eric was coaching us daily. On what we can and can't do on the air. Yeah. He's the one that fucked up nonstop. Like it was nauseating. Like he had me so intimidated going on the air. Like, I was like, I don't know what I can say. Like, I don't even know what I'm gonna do. I'm surprised you, you guys didn't try to put a muzzle on Brad then at that point, you know, you know, I literally sat, yeah. I was, yeah. I was literally, um, sitting there going like this the whole time in my head. Don't say the word fuck. Don't say the word, don't say the word fuck. Don't say the word fuck. Don't say the word fuck. Fucking don't say fuck. I mean, I was going over and over again in my head and Mike was just, I watch it bite because I, I knew. He wouldn't slip up. So I was like, if I just follow his lead, I'll be okay. Yeah, there you go. You know what I mean? And he did really? He did really good. I thought I did pretty damn decent. And then, and then you have, Lord behold, and then you have the king of radio. Yeah. Just throws it under the bus. Right. I talking about dicks and cocks and Pussies, I mean, nah, I'm like, oh, dicks pussies. Dixon pus Billy. It's all about Dixon pussies. And then Poor, poor what's name Justin? The guy, whatever. Justin. Yeah, whatever his name was, he was Justin. Just the just response was Justin was like, yeah, that whole delay was like, like if you could have seen the video. On that. Oh my God. My jaw dropped and my eyes were like triple the size. I was like, oh no he didn't. But he, that's exactly what he looked like right there two more times. But he played it pretty, he two more times he prayed, blah. He played it pretty calm. He's like, um, yeah guys, we cannot say that over here. Yes. Uh, too was fired after his job. Yep. There goes, I'm getting fired. You know Eddie though, the thing was, was this was like, if you've ever been to England at all, Nope. What they say in the bars is way worse than what we said on the air. The way they all talk to each other over there. Like especially a bunch of drinking guys in the pubs. Yeah. I mean, they'll sit there and call you a stupid, I mean, I don't, ah, fuck it. They'll say you're a full Conco. I mean, they'll sit there and just call each other names left and right. Man. They do not fucking care. I can think that's why I got along with 'em so well. Because I don't give a fuck. Yeah. I have yet to travel over to England. I do. It's on my bucket list. But I heard it is an expensive ash trip. I mean, maybe not for Mike, but you know, but for most of us it's an ex, it's an expensive ash trip. Sure. That bad. Yeah. See, there you go. I don't, it's that bad. I think it was, I think the exchange at the time when I went was like, I think, I wanna say it's a dollar 20, I think is what it was. So for every dollar it was like 20 to 25 cents more. So, I mean, you paid a little bit more, but I guess I think too horribly. I, I see, I've heard it was just a lot more, well now it's probably way worse. I would assume the pound is very strong. I don't know. Compared to the American dollar. Mike's probably looking at the currency rate now. Mr. Analyst, I can see it in his face. Fucking knew it. The pound is always strong. It's, it's, it's one pound Sterling is a dollar 25 us. Okay. So it's still the same. So it's a dollar and a quarter. Yep. Still the same. All right. All right. God, it's been 10 years too, or Yeah, 10 or, yeah, I just, I definitely need to make a, I need to make a trip out there, but I definitely need to go back to October Fest out there in Munich, that's for sure. But, um, oh, see, I wanna go to Germany. I gotta get my dual citizenship set up. That was a, that right there, that trip was a fantastic trip that I would love. We were supposed to planning on doing it every five years, and that did not work out. So I don't know what's, I don't know when I'm gonna try to get back over there, but. Um, Fahan. Newgen. Oh, he was a great trip. You said Fark? Newgen. Fahan Newgen. So let me ask far, I'm far from pooping. Hey, I, I do wanna say one thing though. Yeah. You know, my old employer went to Germany and he's been all over. He's been to like, France, Germany, England, all of it. Right. And he said Germany, by far was his favorite country he's ever been. It was, it was a great time. I mean, I literally, the people were fantastic. They were the most friendliest people around. Um, or I'm not just sure if it's, cuz maybe a lot of 'em were drunk, but they were friendly. The females were very open sexually to anything. They were very, very friendly and they, they would talk to you about whatever and are you sure it was a woman? It was a woman. Yeah, yeah. From whatever. Okay. Just make sure. Yeah. It was a woman. Just making sure. I mean, I, you know, that's one thing I only got to, I got to touchy feely. I didn't get to mess around out there. I mean, I was, because again, I was married at that point, so it was one of those, like, I'm being good over here, you know, but Right. They came bumping up on you and showing your titties and stuff. I'm like, if I was on the single side right now, but yeah. But one of my buddies, kid that we took out there, he did get to smash one of 'em out there anyway, I was like, smash, smash, smash. One of 'em. You lucky bastard. Oh yeah. They, I'm telling you, the Bavarian are very, very open about sexuality over there, so yeah. Yeah. It's not like the, uh, Protestant us. No. Hell no. Hell no. They are, they are so open about their sexuality. Mike's already on the, uh, airline website looking flight. You want. It's anywhere from 1800 to th anywhere from 1800 to three grand to fly to Liverpool from Orlando. Oh God. Round trip. Yeah. Fuck that. Yeah. Geez man. I think we flew for like 1100 bucks. Round trip. Did you fly into liver? Did you fly into Liverpool? No, you fly into London and then you take adjoining flight to Manchester. You drive from Manchester. Yeah, so that's fine. That fly London. And that's, that's why it's so damn expensive. The flights are the reason why I didn't go to Vegas this year because, uh, round trip ticket was gonna run me about 700 bucks and I'm in Vegas almost every other year. And I was like, Yeah, no, I don't. The most I've ever paid for it was about 300 bucks and I usually go free Southwest flight points. And when I saw how many points that they were gonna charge me, I had to look at the price. I'm like, yeah, hell with that. I'm not spending this much on points. So, uh, yeah, it's gotten stupid. So who knows when we'll be able to fly g uh, under 300 bucks. So, uh, anyway, so let me ask you guys something. Um, well first, first off, I need to uh, go back to one of you guys episode I was listening to and there's a few of 'em. I need to go back cuz you guys do bring me up a lot on your damn show. Hey, we like you. Um, there the, when you guys had the conversation with the MMA fighter girl and you guys brought up the, the pocket pussy and Okay. The whole, oh yeah. The whole conversation of where you store it at first off, the person who stored it in their toolbox. That's fucking kind of, that's kind of creepy. Like are you that horny that you actually have to store your pocket pussy in your toolbox and then take it with you to a job? Potentially. Plus, hold on, I'll be right back. The unsanitary ness of that one mine, it stays under my sink, in my vanity, in my master bedroom. So it stays away from it and it's clean. So, Because I know you guys are asking Store under your sink. Under my sink. Yeah. It's, you know, we're all my own right there out in the open. What happens if you have family over in, they go into your bathroom. Bathroom. Not, I'm not talking about, lemme me get some toilet paper. Nobody in my master bathroom. I mean, and plus my toilet paper is always stocked anyways before people are clean into a house. So I'll never have that problem and they never get to go in there a chain to the bed. Can I use the bathroom master? No, you can't. Oh, he waits for him to go in. Then all of a sudden he like releases a gas in there. They all fall asleep on the fucking, on the u You do not remember any of this. Yeah, they wake up with a gag ball. Tell, yeah. Gotcha. Well, when I was just in San Augustine, I, when I checked into over at Adam and Eve, we did look at some of the gag balls that were up there, but, um, wait, what? Yeah, dude, we, we went to the right. Won't talk about that, Lou. Yeah, we went to the Adam and Eve store out there and I just wanted to browse around and see what they had. And it, this one wasn't the best Adam and Eve store that I've been into. So it was very, uh, bland. It just had little things just hang on the walls and that was it. Like, ugh. Okay. Did it taste good? Yeah, so the only thing I ended up walking out there was with lube and stuff. So I was like, you know, you walk in here, you got at least walk out with something. So I walked out with a big ass bottle of lube. I said, this will go good for Sally. And you know, it's under the sink right now, so, mm. But yeah, so I wanted to make sure that I made it clear that my shit is, does not go in a toolbox. It actually sits under the sink under, in my master bathroom. So, and that's where it stays until it's need to be used. So, That's, that's exciting. Now, now here's the funny thing. I did see the one that it did, the one that actually looks like a face or whatever, that Brad sent me one time. Was it a photo or a meme where that she tagged me in. I did actually see that on this shelf, and I was like, holy shit, this thing is real. I thought it was a complete fucking jerk. I was like, why didn't you buy it? Nah, it was, uh, it was, have you seen the one? It was really creepy. I'm not gonna lie. It was really creepy to see him first. I'm like, yeah, that's no. Mm-hmm. Not happening. Have you seen the one that's half, uh, Fleshlight half foot? The people down. Yes, I saw that one. Um, I seen not at the store. Pretty fucked up too. That is, that is weird. That, that is a weird, that's almost like, wanna beg a foot. That'd almost be like, in my mind it's almost like having a, the fleshlight and then like one titty on the other end. You just be like cupping the titty while you're banging the flashlight. I mean, I guess that kind of would go with y'all's little double-headed female story that y'all were talking about the other day. What, what, what was that? No, the two-headed girls, Abby and, uh, when Oh, that's right. You the two headed chicks. Oh my God. Yeah. The, the double problems. I mean, I know you're giving, you're giving a blow job and the other one's along for the ride. I mean, that's just awkward. I mean, are you having a conversation with the one while the other one's giving you the blow job? I don't know. Like, what do you do? Like you do, you just, or you ignore her, like she's not in the room with you. You can pet her girl. You just like make weird eye contact. So I could just imagine the other one's, like the entire time she's, uh, nagging her sister. You're doing it wrong. Eh? You're not doing it right. You doing a terrible job. I have to ask Eddie how mother taught us. Hmm? Eddie, go ahead. I have to ask, would you hit it? I didn't see the photo. I don't know what they look like. So, well, hold on. Let's just assume they're hot. Would you do it? No, they're not. Wait, but stop, Mike. I wasn't, I know that. I'm just saying if they were hot, Yeah, they're not, you'd go for it, wouldn't you? I would, I would. You'd go for it with you. I know you would. I would say because it's an experience, you know, just to say, see that's, that's double the moans right there. You get, you know, you get the echo effect surround sound right here. Who needs a four signals though? Could you imagine if one's like deeper, another one's like not so deep. Not so deep. Like who do you listen to? You'd have to set some ground rules. Like which head's in charge? Like okay, so violent, who's the co? So what I understood when you guys were talking about it was that they had control of half the body itself. So, and the sense, I guess they had half the sensory. So does that mean if you were pulling on one hair, the other felt it as well? Like she would have that neck jerk reaction or, you know, they didn't really go into detail, like they didn't. Like they did a whole TLC episode and they went over like nothing. That was like the shit you want to know. Yeah. It was like, this is how we brush our teeth. Well, fuck. That's how I brush my teeth too. I mean, I was just, it's just like watching a stereo. I wanna know how you wipe your ass. Do you guys just take turns with hands or? I want. Yeah, exactly. I mean, I don't understand. It's like, so who plays with food allergies? Is there what like is, I mean who plays with it though? If you're, if you masturbate, is it incest? Like, I mean, I don't understand like, I mean if you, his fingers, if you, if you blind, if you blindfold one, I mean, I guess it wouldn't be incest cuz you just feel like it's another person. I guess we blindfold one. Let you have one blindfold, whatnot. Hey, you can't watch this. I'm taking care of this myself. She, she's got a headphones. I listen to music doing her own thing on the side. She's in a chat room on the laptop. Hold on man. So why are you doing this all the time? Wait, hold on my, hold on, hold on. Getting, let's back this up. I was just ama who, who still talks in a chat room. Old ass Brad's fuck motherfucker. Well, Berger said chat. When you going back to AOL days? I mean 53 White. Oh, I was male. Whatever. However they used to, you know, described asl. Identify yourself. Assl. You did asl. You that was the first thing outta people's mouths back in the AOL days. Assl, tell me if you know what that stands for? ASL A slash S slash l. American Sexual. No, American Sexual la. That be something dumb. What was ass? You wanna give it a shot? I, I forgot those things. I forgot that. I don't know. I I run a h, sex language. Location, location. Location. You got it. Location, age, location. That's, that's, that's how you, my mind was, shit was about to get real. My mind was on auto reload because I was thinking about, uh, If these chicks were in a porno and they were like doing a gang bang, like each, each head having one cock and then two of 'em DP in them like that, that wild shenanigans right there. That'd be fucking that be. That would be an interesting bocky, that's for sure. It would be. Hey. No, it would be an interesting what? That would be a foursome because you had two heads. You could literally, they could literally service like six dicks at one time. Yes. Yeah. No, yeah. Four, two. Oh no. Good one. Their an for too, they're missing, they are missing a potential opportunity. They could make so much money. Wait, what You said they were on t That's probably the worst one to go to. You might as well go to fucking PornHub and really make that money. TLC ain't gonna pay you what PornHub does. I mean, I, I, I'm, I'm sure somebody will watch that. Brad, of course you do. I'd have to watch it for scientific purchases per uh, reasons. Purchase purpose purchases. Scientific, their only fans. He's already, he was hitting the subscribe button, that's why he said it. Yep. Would they charge you double since there's two of them you can die. One get half off. Shit. No. Buy one, get one freeze. This bitch the bogo, one of two heads for price of one, I think. Amazing. But one of 'em like super outgoing and the other one is like way conservative. Because I'd be funny as shit. No, we're not taking it off. I'd be arguing every time like, no, I'm not taking it off. How fuck, how far apart is, I'd never the house he said inches. Oh. Because I was trying to like, they were literal, literally like imagine like where my head's at, like if one was off to the right and the other one was off to the left and there were just a tiny little gap in between them and they're kinda like this spreading out. I mean, it looks like a brussel sprout. And here's the reason why I was asking is because I, I for one, love my road head, but sometimes, you know you don't like driving. What? I, I, well, I love Oh, road head. Road head, road head. So I'm thinking if I was in the passenger side, one could drive while the other head was doing the D Not no. That No, they wouldn't, it wouldn't work. Okay. Nevermind. Yeah, they weren't that far apart. If road head wouldn't work, road headed would not work with two. If one's giving you road head, the other one's sucking. The other one's sucking on the shifter, like literally banging our head against the shifter. If one's giving you road head, it'll knock yourself out on the shifters. God would stop bombing so much. This hurts. Oh, I was thinking something purely the opposite, but then again, not, not many cars or stick shifts, so they maybe be that shifters out the way, you know? True, true. You won't have that problem. I was thinking one could be on the below it, the other one could be on the shaft. Because you know, I don't think they, I don't see they're that close though. Like I think they're, I don't think they, the mechanicals be a problem. Really. Yeah. Now they could maybe turn like this and then they could like have one lick your ass and the other one like lick on your balls and your shaft. And have like this dual little friction thing going maybe right now is like googling two headed mannequins. I, that's the shit that I wanted to know. And then they, they got married to a guy. I was like, what made you decide to marry them? Like, well dude, are you kidding? I mean, he probably was. Hello? He probably wasn't the best looking guy. He probably like, I, Hey, this is what I can get. This is what I get. He was normal looking. Uh, he was, he did you want him to be a midget? Hey, it's real simple guys. He gets double the chances if one's not the mood, the other, because you know them bitches would never agree. You know, when they're on the head, when they're on their rag or whatever. That's double the PMs too. Nope. That means what did their dentist say? Hey, And you know how hard it is to get one woman to decide where the fuck to eat. Now you got two of them. Shit. Fuck. It's getting fucking over there. I don't want Chilis. Literally be ordering like DoorDash every night. Fuck you. It's getting delivered. Just shut up. Yep. We're not back in your corner. Go to the dungeon. No. Yeah, that's a cosplay. But you have dragon chill game again. Yeah, I was gonna say, you definitely win some Halloween costumes, man. Oh shit. Parties, man. You'd be hands down, dressed up like you said, Mike, like they could be a dragon. You could be like a knight dragon, you know what I mean? You could be Zelda when slaying the dragon. Uh, it's fucked up. Alright, let's get off these, let's get off these. I put my dick between your heads. Let, let's get off these women here. Man. I feel bad that we're ragging on these. Let's, um, I'm ragging on 'em. I'm, they might be, I don't even know. They're still alive. They might have to pay homage. Two, four and you just went, Ugh, Robert Pan ho Dang. That's showing in respect. I, I'll, I'll pull out the old pocket, Sally later, I guess if she, if they're dead. Um, Sally. Yeah. So listen, what is, they're 33 and they're still alive. Oh. Oh, they're fifth grade teachers. Could you imagine that fucking scary trauma shit, right? They're going walking in as a fifth grader. Oh, nothing. Kids are the most, I'm just saying kids are the most ruthless things. They will say anything. Oh yeah. Ooh, they have got to pass some thick ass skin for that one. Oh shit. I was gonna more that. Hey, this is an interesting Wikipedia fact and then we can get off of them. Okay, so Abby, Abby is five 10 and is taller and a bit longer legs than Britney, who's four 10. Which makes it difficult for them to balance on a segue. So are they walking with like that? He's gonna have so many comments about this shit. We're everybody care. That's the most important. Their lives. And that makes it weird. I have difficulty thought about he on a segue. Yeah. Nothing else comes to mind but a segueway. So do they have, I, I've gotta assume then they're walking with a cane cuz they got a pimp walked in if they got a shorter leg, you know, just, yeah, I don't know man. I got, I was been so walking, I can't remember. I'm just like, well cuz you can't see my hips down here because who knows if I'm wearing fucking pants on right now or not. So he's stay seated. Please, sir. Oh. Oh. This is some wild shit though. So they use the word I when they agree on something and if they disagree, they use their own names. It's like a, like a secret, safe word. Oh God. It just seems like too much work. I would already broke up with them. Are they still married? God, before I slept. Don't even know what, because Eddie just wanted it in this conquest belt. So just a sexual knocks on the bed post. There you go. Speaking of, we actually had, um, I actually had the straps on the bed, uh, not too long ago and mm-hmm. Sheena's kids happened to, they were in town. Um, cuz we had over Easter weekend they were at the basketball tournament and I totally forgot that the straps were on the bed and she knew, she said, I, we need to take those off. Like what? She goes, the straps like, oh fuck. I said, I guess I forget that they're in there cause they're easily readily accessible for when I need 'em. No. And she's like, yeah, I don't not need to see, have my kids see this. I'm like, I mean, I get it, but you know how much of a pain that is to take on and off sometimes It's just why, it just stays there. So at least somebody didn't like whip out like one of the 18 inch Don or something. Like use it like a baton. Come walking into the room, twirling it. I don't actually, I don't have one of those. I actually got a 12 inch one. I don't have the, I don't have the, the 18 inch one. It's not from me. Trust me. I was gonna say it's a double dog. It's double-sided. What are you guys doing? It's one, it's Kiki Fox. It's one of the ones that you can stick on the wall and just, you know, do the thing. Uhhuh and uhhuh. It doesn't stick very well in my shower. That's, that's all I can say is, wait, wait, what? I'm just gonna leave it at that. Please tell me you're gonna have somebody with you when you're doing that in the shower, hug your house. It is not at my house at this moment. It is left outta town, so, so that way someone else can use it for their pleasure. It's out town. It's he. He just likes to stick it on there so he can accidentally back into it. Yeah, exactly. Sorry. Hey, rock hole. Rock hole. Oops. No. Oh, did I do that? If you ever see, you know, since it's there, if you ever seen one of these 12, 10 inch dons look like, you're like, yeah, who is taking this? Who is fucking taking this? Look at it. I look at it all every day. I wanna take a piss. Oh yeah. Wow. And here we go. The water ain't that cold. What? It's hanging on the, uh, it's hanging on the bathroom wall for my wife. Whatcha talking? Oh, okay. I was gonna say, nice. Try to save their buddy. Yeah. She's like, she's like, Hey, can you, you go at the toy please cuz you're not cutting it. Yeah, this isn't doing it. All right. So, yeah, that's really like, ridiculous. Like the 12 inch cock. Like seriously. Oh yeah. And some girls are like, yeah, let me get that, all that. I'm like, Hmm, okay. You have fun with that shit. But we were actually, there was, there was, oh obviously there was a big black one out there and Adam and Eve and Sheenan was like, I have questions. I'm like, you don't want to know so people can actually ride this. It's, it's ridiculous. I know. Yeah. I don't get it. Cause like, literally you put that up to somebody's stomach and it like goes up to their throat. Yeah. But then, but then you gotta think about it, there's babies that come outta that shit. So how wide are those fucking things, you know? That's wider than 12 inches. Yeah, but you have, you have nine months for that shit to stretch out. You're going like, no you don't. Is it in there at all? Mike? Does this slide out like in the seventh month? Come back up, come back down, go back up. I mean, it comes out one time, bro, sitting up. But what I'm saying is, is that you've got like that entire time for like everything to start expanding. Like the hips start expanding everything. Yeah. But but even so, even when that happens sometimes shit rips. There's a lot shit rips. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah. Does this shit rip during sex? If you have it a 12 inch just railing. You like that? It depends on the girth. Couldn't fucking imagine. 12 inches long. One inch round. Yeah. Oh that. Oh. And I'm just, imagine the fucking like not blacking out, trying to pump that shit up with blood. Don't use Viagra because that's gonna fucking kill you right now. They're all the no shit. And pass the fuck out. Explains the head rushes. You got an erection again. You passed out. We had to get time. You were out. At least somebody will know, like, oh, he's hard cuz he's laid out. Yeah. At least they know the, the symptoms. Oh my God. Um, anyways, anyways, so today I listen, you're ripping your pants too. Every time you get an erection, like that shit wouldn't be fun or you couldn't fucking walk. You'd be down to your knees. What the world, what's the world record? The world record is 13 inches, 13 and a half inches, I believe. Oh, Jesus Christ. What? Yeah. Longer than John Holmes. I, whatever. I think the world record is 13 and a half inches. And it was a dude from, he is overseas? No. Oh no. It's bigger. 18.9 inches. What? World? Record? Record. Oh, 54 year old Robert Cabrera. Yeah. I knew it was a Spanish guy, right? Mexico? Yep. Yes. Wait, the world longest Dick. 18.9 inches. I remember Latin lovers came out for a reason. Dog. I'm just saying. I, I ain't got 18, 18.9 inches. Who? I, I always, I for something that's God damn near two feet. I was thinking 13 was still the largest when I last show I saw, I said 13 was the large. I'm like, good god. 18. Ooh, they're killing somebody with that shit. That's a fucking sword. Biggest penis on the record. Oh, he looks like he, he is an asshole too. Oh, of course. When you walk around with a big dick, like I am the big dick right here, bitch, like I got a huge call. I can take your wife and then you can try to deal with that after. So anyway, so listen, so, so listen, I wanted to ask you guys, well first off, I got two things. What's the craziest thing you've done to try to get out of getting arrested? Ooh, the craziest thing of done or stupidest thing. Let's go with either or. Okay. You get out of getting arrested. Getting out of her, being arrested or have any of y'all been arrested or am I the only one? No, Brad's been arrested. Okay. He's a convict. Yeah, I figured Brad had probably been arrested and multiple. Multiple. He's times He's a felon. Yeah, I'm not a felon. I never asked. No, I never actually got arrested. Okay. So, um, Brad, so what's the craziest, stupidest thing that you've done to try to get out of getting arrested? Of getting arrested? Yeah. I don't know if I would consider it like crazy. I've been in crazy ones where, okay, I got one story. I've told this on our show before. So I had this buddy and we were at this party. It was a little cold out and I, I, I won't do the whole Eddie, or not Eddie, but, uh, Eric, log ass story. But anyway, in a nutshell, we were at this party. Two cops were there, two cops were there. Um, they were up on this hill where this house was on a hill, and my buddy drove one of those old Jeep Cherokees with a big ass fucking side mirrors on either side. Yep. If you know what I'm talking about, back in the freaking late eighties. Well, anyway, So he basically decides he's gonna squeeze between these two cop cars. Now we had a guy that was over 21 in the car with us, you know, that bought us beer and shit. Sure. And then I was in the front seat and I had beers on me and you know, inside my jacket and stuff. So he goes through the cop cars and the mirrors go scratch the shit out of the cop cars. The cops go, Hey, and the coach start coming down the hill and he goes, and so wait, what does he do? He backs up, scratches him again, dude, cop gets us out of the car. Uh, basically searches us. Searches me. I thought I'm going to jail. I got alcohol all on me. I had an open beer in my, like my pants, you know, like right there by my belt buckle. Like I stuck it down there. And then they got him outta the car. They arrested him for D u I, uh, said, are you okay to drive? I said, I sure as should am. So as we're following him, he's looking back in behind in the cop car, looking back at us and we're like holding our beer cans up, going, you know what I mean? Driving behind the cop. So I don't know if you remember where the old police station was over by the lake wire. We, we went up there. They had a dumpster there and we knew we were gonna have to go in, and his mom was on the way. So we took all the beer out of the car at the police station and threw it in their dumpster. Oh shit. Okay. Yeah, man. So, well, I wouldn't say it was like super crazy, but I mean, it got us outta trouble because, or, or like I said, or stupid. Because here's the reason why I ask before I get into kind of topic today, I want to get into, I just happened to come across this story, was that a man in Colorado decided to try to frame his dog for a dui. His dog. His dog. God, that makes sense. Yeah. That fucking, yeah, a hundred percent. He, uh, he got pulled over and I guess the cops saw him trying to switch seats with the dog when he got pulled over and said he wasn't behind the wheel driving. And the guy's like, how much have you had to drink? He said, Nothing. It was a dog. The dog was like, obviously this is Colorado. So you know, there's plenty of fucking weed out there. So shit, all he had to say is, this car identifies as a Tesla. You've gotten out it auto drives this picture drives a Tesla, drives itself. Yeah. The article. I know he was driving. Did you still get a DUI for that? I wonder if you could still get a D U I for that? If the car's self-driving? Yeah, if you're sitting, you programmed it and you didn't touch the, here's the rule. Here's the rule. If you're sitting in the driver's seat Yep. You can get a D U I, whether you're driving or sitting in a parked drive. In a parked garage. If the car is running and you're sitting in the driver's seat, you can get a dui. Yeah, I thought the, or the keys not ignition or the keys in the ignition soccer player. No, I thought the keys had to be away. I think you had to be with Nope, I had a buddy. That his keys were in the ignition. The car was off. He was in a parking lot at Steak and Shake. They arrested him and gave him a du u i because the key was in the ignition. They said, if you would've just put the keys on your seat, you would've been fine. We wouldn't have got you for a dui. We've just told you slip it off or call somebody and you're in the driver's seat. Yep. And the keys are ignition because that you can watch the, uh, soccer player when she gets pulled over in the parking lot with her kids in the car. Yeah. For dui. She's actually sitting in the parking lot sleeping and someone calls 'em because there's two kids in the back. Uh, she, they're awake and she was sleeping in the driver's seat, sleeping off some alcohol, and, uh, she got arrested for DUI cuz of that. And it was a big deal. Yeah. See I don't, with today's technology, why not just get an Uber? I mean, it's so easy to get an Uber. That's one of those things is I, Hey, I'm not gonna sit here and be that guy though. I've done it myself, which is stupid. But I've done it. I'm not gonna lie, I've done shit when I'm fucking with Clint Sometimes I'm like, fuck. Uh, either we're gonna get the Uber, or sometimes I end up go picking 'em up and they say, you know, I'm driving. I'm like, maybe I shouldn't have been driving, you know? Mm-hmm. But, but I, I'm not gonna lie, there have been times where I like, come on Eddie, you know, better than this. Um, yep. But yeah, shit happens. But yeah, for the most part it's always an Uber. I'm, I'm usually pretty good with just saying, Hey, I know I'm gonna be drinking, getting an Uber, but sometimes you got friends that influence you and then you just totally forget. So, and sometimes that one you just make dumb ass decisions. Yeah. And that's, well, and I think the worst one too is, is where you think you're okay when you've been drinking. Mm-hmm. You think you're okay when you get in the wheel and then you're driving like back from Tampa and you get about halfway back and then you realize you're not fucking okay. You know, it starts, that's the worst and shit's getting worse and you're like, oh, fuck. Better pull that bitch over and sleep it off a little bit. Yeah. So you're absolutely right man. Done that. Been there, done. I've only had that happen one time to me when I was a kid. And luckily it was back when, when I four was not fucking packed out. Well, it's, but, and I pulled off. I pulled off and stopped cause I was like, oh my God, right now what? I four is not dead. The deadliest highway in the country. So no dear. Cause nobody fucking knows how to drive in Florida. I, I literally was coming back from work yesterday. I obviously from St. Pete, four accidents between, um, the Howard Franklin, is that the Howard Franklin 60 whatever, 60 Bridge is, I think it's Howard Franklin. And between there and I four, before I even got to plant City, four or five accidents just on that damn road, I'm like, holy shit. Mitch Howard Franklin, by the way, is it Howard Franklin? Okay. Yeah. Cause the other one's the Gandy. Okay. Okay. I always forget those fucking bridges, but anyways, but, uh, so yeah, so today I wanted to ki damn we've already been 35 minutes before we even get to the topic of the day. So I know that's why our children's on so long as we fucking just talk. Um, you get a chance in the chat, check out the giant dick guy cuz it's fucking insane. I will. That's all I gotta say. I will have to look at this a little bit. Um, so like, it's giving me fucking nightmares just looking at this bitch. Dude. Stop looking at pictures of me. Alright, so anyway, so sitting down and it's extending past this kneecap. I mean, that's fucked up. Not now. You're gonna hit me. You said it's in the chat. Let me take a look here real quick. Yeah, it's in the fucking chat, like fourth image down. Uh, it's, it's, it's not letting, it's fucking painful. It's not letting me click right now. So I think it's because it's recording, but no, um, I'll take a look at it later. Check it out later. Um, so anyway, so it's a sun article. So today I wanted to get your guys stuff and I know Brad, I'll probably get a lot of, um, Feedback on this, but why is your mouth open like that? Were you actually contemplating having that 18 inches in your old mouth, sir? Like you look like Yeah. My, my, my, if my mouth is 18. Okay, just jumping. Eddie was talking to Brad at that moment. Not me. Cause I was drinking my alcohol. All right. So anyway, tipping, tipping. Today's tipping process, ethics procedures. When you guys are going out, restaurant bars, stores, wherever it be tipping, where do you typically tip and where do you say, no, I'm not gonna tip. And the reason why is because I had a post that I put on Facebook not too long ago. And, and of course it blows up, you know, I happen to sprinkle little shits every now and then on Facebook and the ship goes crazy, right? I'm just like an instigator. But anyways, my beef was, when I'm in a restaurant, I will tip 20, 25%. Not a big deal. No matter where I'm at, especially even if it's in these fancy restaurants, you're gonna pay a trash. Like, you know, you're going there, you're gonna, you're going to pay extra on the service. Where I have an issue with is a lot of times recently here, and I've noticed this trend growing and growing more, is that when you like go to, uh, like a, uh, fucking, what's that? Damn Dave and Busters or something like that, and you're gonna go get your card for how many games you're gonna play. When you swipe your card, that little screen says 50 bucks plus, you know, tip, like, do you tip the person that's giving you a card so that way you can go play games and stuff like that. Like, it's become, like I was at Panera Bread and I get my morning sausage biscuit before I go into the office. And then it's like you feel obligated cuz like you, you're spending eight bucks or whatever and next thing you know, tip 15, 20, 20 5%. I'm like, but all I did was just order my thing to go. I'm not sitting down like, what's, why do I have to tip? And, and the thing is, I feel obligated and I feel like a asshole if I don't hit the button and say, yeah, I'm gonna tip. What are your guys' thoughts? Do you guys tip on this type of situation? Obviously the restaurant, everyone knows restaurant. You're gonna tip, you should tip. Even if you get bad service, you even could tip the minimum. And at that, the minimum. Now it seems like it's going, they keep on jacking this shit up to 30. Yeah, 35%. Like, let's stick to one, you know, percentage. It, you know, my, my pay ain't going up consistently. Why does all of a sudden, because you know, the economy's going bad that the tip's gotta go up. Like it doesn't make sense. But anyway. So what are your guys' thoughts? Do you tip at places other than restaurants? Do you want me to go first? Brad? Which one do you guys got pointed at? You. All right. Which one do you guys wanna take This? Okay, so I sometimes will tip like on pickup and drive through if they are giving me good service. If it's quick, it's fast. Like my little Chinese place down the road, I always tip them even though I'm just pi I mean literally driving there and picking it up just cuz they're friendly. A Chinese place like the massage place or Cause you tip them, you gives them a tip. All shit. No, I'm talking about the place he gives more, it gives them two tips. Get the food. Okay, I gotcha. Okay. You get the food at. Um, so where I draw the line is, is I would not tip it like a Dave and Busters if I'm ordering like a gift card, cuz that doesn't make any sense, right? Because that's not, that's not a service. They're getting paid like an hourly wage to run the register. They're not getting paid as a server rate. Um, I don't, I don't mind tipping, like picking up food like at Carabas and stuff like that because I know, uh, and I'm, I could be wrong on this Brad, I can probably correct me, but when you're working the window, you do get paid a little bit more, but you still don't get paid like good, right? Still it's just minimum wage. It's not, but it's not server minimum wage, it's just regular minimum wage. So I always like to tip 'em because they still have to like put the food together and they have to bag it up and they gotta put all the stuff in there. They gotta look through it, make sure everything's right. And people have a tendency to remember you, especially if you eat at the place a lot. So if you tip, they normally come out and like take care of your shit first. So I like to tip places, like tip for places like that. All right. And you know, like I said, I don't have a problem ballets. Yeah, of course you gonna to ballets, of course. Yeah. Cause they got your fucking car. You gotta wanna tip them. Um, but yeah, no, I mean, stuff like that, like valets, restaurants, you know, the, the, the fast food. I'm still, I'm still on the fence with that one because I feel like I literally ordered on the kiosk to order my food, go to the desk to pick it up. Now I have to tip on this. The, I have the, the fast food's a no for me. So is, so has donated the charities? Yes, for the most part. Don't ask Mike to round up 3 cents cuz he'll say No thank you. No thanks. He does. I swear to God, Eddie, I was, it was, what was it Kenny? Who embarrassed your wife? I think, I think I heard of someone. Those episodes you guys had about this. Yeah, it was like, it was like 1199. She's like, would you like to round that up? And so tell No, I'm good. Thank you. It was, it was, it was for the Wounded Firefighters Association. I couldn't spare an extra penny for them to save the families. That's the fucking asshole. I know. It totally embarrasses wife is best ever. Yeah. She was like, oh, because I did well if the was things I just didn't give, I just said no. Thank you. Like, it was like, it was like, I thought they were asking me, I wanted a fucking brownie or some bullshit. Cause you know, they're always trying to upsell you and we all know you wouldn't say no to that bitch. He would've been like, yeah, go ahead. Can you throw it an extra one too, please? For 2 99? Yeah. I got a buddy that needs it too. That asking for a friend. Fuck you, Eddie. All right, let's, let's hear your side of this, your tipping side. And we're not talking about Cal tipping, Brad tipping or anything like that. We wanna know what Brad tips. Okay, I will tip, I will tip 20%, nine times outta 10 at a restaurant. Sure. Um, on to-go orders. I'll normally, like, let's say if it's like 20 bucks, I'll throw in $3. You know, something like that. I, I don't, I don't normally give them like 20% on a to go order. Um, cuz usually they fuck it up. I mean, honestly, most of the time, most, nine times outta 10, they fuck my shit up. Um, they'll always be short me something. Um, believe it or not, who's done it lately is Chick-fil-A and they're usually on the money, but they'll forget like, my fucking sauce dude or something like that. So I gotta go back and get it, you know what I mean? Pain in the ass. Yeah, he didn't forget, or Jesus be like trying to save you from diabetes or you, or you can be like, Eric, when he gets all hyped up about DoorDash fucking up his order. Well, that's how own motherfucker's fault. Come on. Yes. Come on. Seriously. One a hundred percent Eric's fault. If it's fucked up, you're gonna order again. Like, what the hell? Lemme do it again. Well to no, listen to his defense. I have, I have had orders where have it has come fucked up. And then, and usually DoorDash is, customer service is pretty fucking spiffy and spot on. They will refund you, get you whatever you need asap. P p they said they had, I had a bad order and they're like, do you want to have this reordered or do you want to just have a refund? I said, no, I, I'm hungry. I would like to have my food. So they went ahead and reordered and they still gave me a little bit of credit. Not all of it. It. And for some reason, and this was, and Chipotle, I love Chipotle, but for some reason that day they had a worst, they had a bad fucking day because my first order was wrong. And then when the second order came, it was fucking wrong as well. Had my name on it and everything, and it was a completely different order. I was like, okay, I'm done. And I reached out to them again and they said, would you like to order? I said, no, I'm done with 'em. Just gimme my refund. I'm fucking pissed and I'm hungry. So I went to bed, fucking mad as hell. Um, yeah. So anyways, Eric Collins, that shit. Yeah. So anyways, so it to his defense, yeah, I would get a reorder, but usually the second time it should be better. But not this, not, it was one of those that, yeah, this one fucked up twice. So whatever. And I looked and I made sure, no, I will. I made sure it wasn't me that ordered it wrong, so I went back to them. Nope, this is right. Yeah, twice. So it was on them. See, I can't get over that because even though I'm like, I don't mind spending money. When I get on there and I start ordering shit and I know that it's like a $10 item and they're charging like $22. Mm-hmm. Plus the delivery. I'm like, oh, Jesus, man, I can't be this lazy. Like, I just gotta drive up there and get it. Like I just, for some reason Yeah. It's like, that's my tipping point. Yep. No, I, okay. Starbucks at a, at a soccer game. Oh, okay. Hold on though. That was different. Yeah. Yeah. It was like we were was Cold event. It was fucking cold. Cold. Okay. And you were crying like literally, oh, gonna, were crying and you like, oh, I something warm hold. And I was like, here's my dick. And you said, oh, I would've been fine with that. Just plus I thought little buddy, everybody, everybody was watching as, as our two fucking old asses that don't have any kids in this high school girls soccer game. You know, roll up to the little car that pulls up and gets hands. Two Starbucks drinks and we're standing over by the coaches. So one thing, we're either like fucking scouts, like two fat scouts from out of nowhere college, or we're just fucking weirdos. Hey look, watching person, he's recruiting. This is, this is coming from the same guy Eddie that wanted to freaking like, wear a t-shirt. You wanna tell him what it was on? We gotta be on it, Mike. No, no. We've had this conversation. We've, we've Oh, okay. We've had, okay. We have had that conversation. Yeah. Sorry. That's Brad's Alzheimer's kicking in. Yeah, sorry. Fucking conversations. Huh? What? So what about though, Brad, what about when you go, and I think you may have said that, I must have missed it. When you actually go to like a David Busters or whatever, uh, do you or any, just anything that's starting to ask for tips now, like. I don't tip. You don't tip at all. But you don't feel No. If it's complicated, you don't feel guilty if you say, no, not at all. Because you know what? I wasn't tipping before that, so why should I do it now? Just because they put it on a freaking keyboard and a machine in front of me. It's different. If they were offering me a service like a server or somebody that's bringing food to me or whatever it might be, that's fine. I'm getting a gift card or whatever. Yeah. Fuck you man. Sorry. Here. Bye. And see there's 50 bucks. Gimme my gift card. I'm out. And see, I got into, yeah, the debates with a lot of folks that were servers and they're like, well, you don't understand what we gotta go to. It's like, but I get it. If you're in the restaurant, I do business, a restaurant business, I completely understand that I'm gonna take care of it. But when I just go in just to grab something and leave I, and you put, mm-hmm. And you put this tip machine in front of me, like, and now a lot of places, they stand there when you swipe your card like . Waiting for you to face, I'm looking straight in the face. I'm like, uh, thank you. Okay. All right. So I, I, I, I, to me, I, I have, I could be an asshole, but I feel guilty as shit. You put that in front of me. It's like people come knocking on my door to door. Like, you know, when they try to sell me something, I'm like, Ugh. I, I'm not that guy that says, please leave me alone. Go away to no solicitors, please. I'll just sit there, wait and listen, listen. And then, no, I'm not interested. Thank you. Oh, you sure enough? I'm good. I'm sure. And then just, I feel bad after a while. See, I got the best invention and I learned it from Mike actually a year prior to that. And that is, I went and got myself a ring doorbell in what? And cams. So now I can see them coming. I just don't answer the fucking door well, and I just let 'em stand there and I'm, and because it comes up on my TV set too, with my Alexa app. Yeah. So I can literally get a box in the corner that it shows me that somebody's sitting at my door and I'm like, no, I'm good. Yeah. I had the ring at my old house, but this house, I have 10 cameras at this house, but yet I still, I bet you do. I still open the door every now and then. Most of the time, you know, I feel bad again. I feel bad cause I'm sitting on my couch watching TV and they're like, they see my, cuz I got the glass door so they can see my TVs on and all that. I'm like, ah. Fuck. Yeah. You know, I got those nine pane window, like farm doors. So I like to do is stand on the inside with my cup of coffee, and they're standing on the outside and I say, Hey. They're like, Hey, how you doing? Like, waving at me and I'm like, the door's locked. Do you have the key? And I'm standing on the inside. So they're like, what the fuck is like, I, I can't get out there. Was I, I had you serious. I had a, I had a guy going for like 20 minutes. Like literally he was, I'm walked in my own house. Yeah. See, I'm a dick. Thought the all backwards. I saw, I put the doorbell backwards. I've been stuck in here for weeks. I had a lady, a group, um, of Jehovah Witnesses that was coming to my old house on a regular, because I love those people. I was just, I was home because I had just finished having one of my shoulder surgeries, one of four, uh, shoulder surgeries. Um, and I happened to make the mistake of opening the door. So then they're like, oh yeah, we're gonna come talk to you and make you feel, you know, you know, cuz I know you're gonna be home alone and you're, you're sore, you can be hurt, blah, blah. I was like, all right, fine, whatever. So then when I was with my ex, I was telling her, I said, you know what? If you're gonna be home, and I know they're gonna come through, what we need to do is leave the windows open and start fucking and see what happens if, if they're gonna come back or not be like, no, okay, we're not doing this. It just got really weird all of a sudden. But I will, I sometimes I feel like either I'm gonna just open the door naked and be like, Hey, what's up? And see what happens. My luck, my luck. It'd be the, well sir, how are you? And then I'm like, fuck, this didn't work, you know? No, I got it, dude. I got it. I can tell you how I can tell you to handle the situation. Just wear a dip suit, dude. We're one. No. All you have to do is ask them and say all, all seriousness, say, let's say, oh wow, I'm so glad that you guys are here. How many members do you have? And they'll rattle off some crazy number and they're like, Yeah, but only 144,000 of you get into heaven. So how do I get up in that top 144,000 people? And they'll bewilder 'em. They'll be like, oh, I don't know. It's like, are one of you gonna gimme your spot? Like, do you have a card? Like what, what's the deal here? Like, is there, like, is there a special pass? You know, because if I'm not in the top, like why do I want to show up? I'm a little fucking late. And this isn't just 144,000 this year. This is like 144,000 people of all time since your shit was founded. So like, I guess I didn't realize there was a caps of people, there was a cap on there. Uh, A cap on their religion. They believe in a cap. Yeah, they believe in a cap. Like there's, there's a, there's a limit. You're bidding. You're bidding for Christ. I'm like, shit. Like, oh. And I'm not that good of a person. So I mean, I don't know what my odds are. Cause I'm already coming late in the game. I'm 46 years old. That means I'm 46 years behind. Some of the dumb asses. I hate tell you, you got people born into this shit. So you're telling me little fucking Timmy's not gonna go to heaven first. Unfortunately, how'd I get his number? And unfortunately that group is a very tough group to work with too, because I had to, oh, teach. I had to DJ a wedding. Uh, um. A Jehovah's Witness wedding. And before the wedding itself, every song that was potentially going to be played had to go through a committee, a ho committee to approve songs that were to be played. And then of course, obviously they provided me songs that they wanted to hear during the events, but songs that obviously that would fill in the rest of the night. Every song that I was, and it's like, who knows what song? I said, I don't know the vibe that I'm gonna be feeling. I don't know who, how the crowds reacting to certain music. I don't know. So it limited me to such a small group, and, and it literally took almost a week for these people to go through the whole committee and, you know, approve songs. It was, it was crazy, man. I was like, never again will I go through this process ever, ever again. So I, I have to ask Eddie, were you single? Uh, no, I was not at the time. I was gonna shoot you. Bang one of those 444,000. No, listen. You know, believe it or not, I'm more like Mike, I've always been in relationships. It seems like I don't stay single very long. I mean, look at me. Do I look like I stay single very long? I mean, yeah, exactly. Oh yeah. So I'm just second. Here we go. Exactly. Jesus Christ, when you got it sound like Eric, when you got our little set, six outta tendency to like us and they wanna keep us. I mean, cuz speaking of, matter of fact, I sent Sheena, or I called Sheena a over you was safe over the weekend I was leaving, uh, Lowe's and I had a cart, one of those carts, full 20 bags of topsoil. And as was, I was pushing this out, I saw this car creeping up on me and rolling the window down. It was like, oh boy. At first I was like, you're about to get abducted. I was like, first I was like, these bitches think I'm Mexican and probably doing some work. And they wanted me to come to their house, goddammit, but instead fences up. No, I bless. So instead, I can just imagine Migo sure enough, L Duo loto. Ironically it was two older white women that rolled up and I was like, that's the whole point. I was like, oh, they're gonna fucking ask me if I either, I got some work. But they asked me, Hey, how you doing? You want, is that coming up? Is that coming to our house? You gonna bring that to our house? We could use it. I'm like, no, no ma'am. I'm gonna, I got my own yard work to do. And uh, so then she started asking me questions. I'm like, I don't fucking know. She, she asked me about something, Loomer or something. I was like, I don't know. I said, all I know is I had a vision, I was, knew where I needed to go grab my stuff and go, I don't look around, I just go to Lowe's and get the stuff I need to get to finish my project. Yeah. No shit. And she's like, okay, well we just figured to stop and ask and stuff. I'm like, Hmm, hmm. And then yesterday, I, not yesterday, when was Mother's Day? Sunday. Sunday was Mother's Day. Yeah. Sunday. So I, so that happened on Saturday. So I go Sunday to my mother's mother's day with my mom and my aunt, and we had a, um, a very flamboyant waiter in Chili's and Oh yes, this was the worst. Lots of fla it, it was, it was bad. Like one, there was no salt on the table. We, our, our chips of salsa never got brought in. And all of a sudden, you know, he goes, oh, I'm so sorry. I'm like, oh my God, I will make this up. He said, After I, he goes, do you want another round of beer? I'm like, oh, of course. Yeah, I know I'm gonna, I'm gonna drink more than one round. It's two for one. Why not? He comes back, this one's on me. I'm like, oh man. And lemme tell you, man, it is no, listen, I, I have a lot of gay friends. I, you know, there's, there's nothing wrong with this. You do, but it's, it, it was, I told my mom and said, should I drink this? I might have gotten roofy if I drink this. You know, I don't know where this is gonna end up. Dude is the first time any woke up in a strange place tied to another bed, face down. So I'm like, so I gotta ask. Then we're back to the whole second situation. Do I tip now for this? Because he gave me extra beer. I just want a different, real quick. So, yeah. I gotta ask real quick, because like, if I was in that situation, walk, cause I'm also dark-skinned. If I'd have walked out and these two women approached me, I'd have so totally been like, no, I. And just kept fucking walking. How to reverse that shit. Yeah. But, but a lot of, but a lot of 'em will try to start speaking to you in Spanish. Like, oh fuck, this is now I'm done. Yeah. Because a lot of' em actually have no, then And they're like, no bless. And they're like, wait a minute, you spoke Spanish to me, you asshole. No Abla. So I just thought it was funny that I, so when of course wanna talk to Sheena's, like, listen, I got hit on by older women and I got hit on by a gay guy. At least I knew I can attract both sides of the spectrum. Everything. Exactly. So fucking everything back to, this is why I never, I think should stay single very long. His ass though. Oh, he got, I think he should tip this. I'm not even, I think you should tip it. I'm not even gonna say the way I was gonna say it. He got a tip on the piece of paper. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's why was making sure I, I re. My words. What said this beer's on me. You should have been like, I'd rather be in you. Wait, what? Huh? What? Where? I can't have something else on you? Yeah. Mm-hmm. Where you, where you gonna pour it? Yeah, baby. Yeah. Y'all gonna make me drink this redemption bre. Another glass here. I've already went through two. See, the problem with that is what scares me is is that like you just, even though they have like the gay voice, you never know how fucking strong the motherfuckers are. Oh, yeah. Which, you know what I mean? Which, okay, so like, I've had some little ass gay friends. Wait, wait. What does it have to do with anything? I've had some, I've had some little ass gay friends that are strong as little ass gay friends. You know what I'm talking about? Like they're wiring little, they act. No. Fuck you both. You know, they're acting, they're acting. They act dainty. They're all like, you're my tight bitch. You know? And like, everything. And it's like all of a sudden though, when they fucking like, wanna put you in an arm bar, you're like, what the fuck just happened? No. It's what the fuck just happened? No, not into Spanish guys. Some of 'em you come on. Everybody's into Spanish guys. Everyone wants a Spanish, Latin love, um, lot fire. No. Yeah. Some of 'em, some of 'em are. Some strong s you know, they're used to, you know, manhandling people. Literally manhandling people. Yeah. Manhandling Eddie. Just not what you're, while your head, I can't tell you like how many times I've asked. They've been asked if I wanna vea, you know, and I don't even speak Spanish. And I'm not Spanish, but they're like, would you like Avea? And they say it in Spanish, however, say you say, would you like I don't even know how to say that. I mean, I know what it is cause I hear it so many times. Like, all, you know, be good to go. Yeah. That's it right there. Yeah. Yeah. Cho Mamak. No, never say Makk. I don't know. I don't even know what another shit means. Spanish. Damn. That'd be fantastic. Look at that. We've already hit an hour guys, and uh, I still got shit we can still talk about. But I know what you guys need to do is you guys need to go ahead and, uh, do you tip people based on how they look? Yes. Hmm. I'm just kidding. Don't I? Don't you lying. You lying. Fuck. I was gonna say, you lying motherfucker. Listen, you were thinking about saying no. Listen, listen, listen, listen. Here's how this works. Bullshit. It depends even if you, if, if you look good cuz you can be a bitch and you look good as hell. Right? You cuz you know your shit just can get whatever you want and you can be a fucking bitch if you look decent and you. Can flirt with me and you can actually hold a conversation and joke with me cuz I'm a fucking jokester when I go out. Like I will be the talk, I will talk to everybody. And if you will hold that conversation. Yes, 100% you will get tipped at, whoops. Hit the damn mic. You will get tipped pretty well if you make you know, good conversation and enjoy my jokes and laugh. If you are snooty as hell and you know you're a fucking perfect 10. Yeah, you ain't gonna get much from me. I mean I'm still gonna tip you but you're not gonna get much. But if you are the looks and the personality abso fucking lutely, you will get extra for sure. Have you ever tipped somebody well even though they didn't deliver good service, just cuz you felt bad for 'em? Yes, I have. Like I said, I felt bad because the other tables were treating them. So I've done it. Like I said, I will tip no matter what the minimums, like I, my minimum's typically 20%. Right? Um, yeah. Even if you give me shitty service, I'll be pissed, but I'm not an asshole where I'm, I'm not gonna tip you. Right. Like at least I'm in a position where, okay, find I'll, I'm, I'm gonna tip you. If I wasn't in, in the position, I probably don't go out as often, but, and that was a whole nother debate on the whole tipping thing. Well, if you can't afford to go out, I'm like, no, that, don't use that as a fucking excuse. Cuz sometimes people just fucking suck at their job and not, not every server is fucking the greatest server in the world. Um, but yeah, if it's bad service and uh, no personality, you're still gonna get the minimum. But I'm not gonna go over the top. Absolutely not. Yeah. I mean, I had a situation, I was at Son's and there was this older lady that was working there and she was doing like not a good job. Like part of it was they double satter. Which is always a bitch for a waiter, waiter, waitress. Um, but then she was sitting in there and she was talking to like another table, and I overheard her and she says, I'm, I'm working this, I'm working 16 hours. And I got, and I've got another four hours to go before I'm off my shift because like, I guess two people called in and she's like, I've been on my feet and I, this is, I haven't had a day off in seven days. Mm-hmm. And I just felt so bad for her. Hmm. I was like, holy shit, this sucks. So you just got double sat and you've been working 16 hours on your feet running food and. I felt bad for her. So literally like, you know, I gave her like a hundred bucks on like a $20 order. There you go. Because I just felt bad even though she, even though she, even though the service was like, I mean, she like forgot I had to ask her like four times to go grab my sweet tea and she, she kept going, Aw, damn sweetie, I'm so sorry. Like, I just got distracted. And I'm like, okay. Like it's fucking sweet tea. Like, no, no. I mean, I is that, you know what I mean? I mean, I've done that just like that. That's how she had a great day. I've done the, uh, I've done the whole tipping more than what the bill is. I've done that a few times. Um, but where I've also have also, I'm not sure if you guys have done this tip generously, was if you happen to have an older, older person who probably should be retired and you know that they are working because social security ain't giving them shit and they don't have That's right. And they're working their ass. That's how this lady was. Yeah. So that's point was no matter what I'm like, all right, this is someone's grandma. This is someone's mom that should be home. You know, making quilted blankets for their grandkids. But they're out here working because my, my grandmother, my grandmother as my grandmother's four, nine, something like that. And she's just a little fragile old lady. But yet when she came to Connecticut, she wanted to do a little work on the side just to make some extra cash. And she was in Kohls and it was killing me. I'm like, why do you want to do this? But, so when I see this, I'm like, all right, this, I gotta help out. So I'm usually yeah, tipping extra, extra so that way they can have a little something, you know, whatever I mean to them, any little bit will help 'em, because obviously fucking today's economy fucking sucks ass. So I'll tell you, my pet peeve about tipping though, and I don't know if this has happened to you, but have you ever been in like a restaurant or something like that? And then you've bought merchandise as well at the restaurant on like, say shirts or something like that? Like, and it's more of like the resort style places. Yep. Yep. And they bring the bill and they add the auto gratuity for like 20%, and it includes the merchandise. So you're like buy like, You know, three shirts at like 30 bucks. So you have 60 bucks, you got 60 bucks in merchandise, and then you have like your $50 B bill in food. So you're sitting at like 110 bucks and they auto put the gratuity on there for 20% on the whole fucking bill that I have. Not, that drives me nuts that I have not encountered. Um, I've had that happen a couple times and I don't even fucking realize it until after I've paid the bill and I'm like, motherfucker, I just paid a tip on fucking t-shirts. I can see that happening like over at, uh, Hooters and Wing House where they sell you shit while you sit in there. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. Hmm. No, this, this was at one of those places, like over, um, one of 'em was at Lovebirds, right here in Lakeland. Oh. The one at, because the kids wanted some, the Starbucks. The Starbucks there on the corner. I heard it's pretty good. I have the kids wanted some of those. Brad, how is, I know you've got there. It's crack. It's good. Yeah. See Brad's in there. So yeah, it's like crack. It's like crack. Parking's a bitch, but it's really good. It's retarding that's, that's what makes it e, even when it was a Starbucks, it was retarded. I'm like, this is nuts. Yeah. Now it's even more retarded. I mean, you got people fucking fighting each other to get chicken and it's like, honey, my god damn chicken. Now really? Is it? Is it that good? Yeah. Oh, it's that. Yeah, it's that good. And it's that intense. Like it's just, and they, they got that shit like clockwork. Like here's your fucking piece of chicken. Move the fuck outta of the way. Here's your piece of fucking chicken. Move the fuck out of the way. See, I can't remember the last time I actually went to It's good, the place and got some just fried chicken. Like I think Publix was the last place to get fried chicken pub. Cause Publixs fried chicken is fucking the bomb. Oh. They have some good fucking fried chicken puppets now. Don't be knocking on, but anytime I've gone to like, no, no, absolutely not pub. I love public chicken. I'm just laughing it now you got all Mike Subject right there. We'll tie for another 30 minutes. Damn. Popeye Popeye's Chicken. Like you just never get that shit Popeyes down here on South Florida. No, they never had chicken. It's a chicken spot. They never got fucking chicken. Yeah, they're either outta fucking chicken or their fucking credit card slash cash machine doesn't fucking work. Oh, we got the chicken now, but we can't take the money. Yeah. No, sorry for your luck. Luck. Oh, we had a chicken. We could take the money, but we out a chicken. I've never understood that. So why even have this store open if you got no goddamn chicken? I don't understand why they paying you to be here. The chicken close that shit up. Don't, that's like, and they make you go through the whole fucking thing. It's like number one. No, I'm sorry. We don't have anything now. Um, alright, I'll just take a number two. Yeah. We're, we're outta number two as well. How about you just me get a fucking piece, piece of chicken. No, we're, we're, we're, uh, how about a piece of dark meat? Um, yeah, we're outta dark meat. Oh yeah. White meat. Fucking outta white. So what the fuck do you have? Like what do you have? We don't have anything. Gas register motherfucker. And then like, are you gonna tip us after this, sir? Yeah. No shit. No shit. You can see I'm bitter with some of this tipping stuff. Shitty service. That's true story too, man. You, you laugh, but that's true. Yeah. Well, here's the thing. Like a tip. Here's what people get. Fucking forget A tip is for doing a good job. It's not, it has nothing to do with being expected. Like it's not. Automatic. That's why it's optional. Well, no. You know what I mean? That's, that's true. But I think a lot of folks, that's the original intention of it. Right. But I think a lot of folks that are, that get into this industry is like, all right, well I'm gonna make good money off of tips. Well, not if you're not doing well. Correct. Cause they feel like it. Yeah. It's, it's retarded. But then we're, I've got myself into trouble with folks that are in this industry is, I'm like, remember, this is a fucking interim job for like, really, um, high school kids, maybe college kids that are working. Yeah. Not a career. Like maybe if you were in the management and maybe if you owned it and, and that type of situation, or if you were like a regional manager, different. But if you're there working, like thank you. Typically you should only be here between teenage years, maybe your college years getting through school. Don't make this a career. If you think of this as a career. You are already making bad decisions in your life. If you're then all of a sudden you're expecting other people to pay additionally for your life choices. I mean, that's what drives me nuts about the fucking minimum wage and like fucking McDonald's and shit. Okay. McDonald's is supposed to be like an intro job. It's like, here's your intro, fucking working. You get to deal with fucking people and learn some fucking people skills in like a high stress situation. So when you go out in the real world, you could be thankful for having a great job. This isn't like, I need to support my 19 fucking kids off your fucking Happy Meal. Absolutely. Absolutely. You know what I mean? Like seriously, I, I threw a temper tantrum one time. I, I was taco. It was Taco Bell and I, it's been a while since I've been in Taco Bell, and in my order came out wrong. I said, I said, see, and this is why you guys want more than minimum wed, you can't even fucking read the order. Right? The back. And I, I lost my shit and I walked out, but then I felt bad. I was like, Maybe I shouldn't. Taco Bells. Let's, I've already sitting here going a couple dicks. Taco Bell, taco Bells. Cause it's literally like the same fucking five ingredients for fucking everything. Everything is the same fucking five ingredients. All you gotta do is put it on the right fucking wrapper. Like that's it. Do you want a burrito? I'm gonna fold it this way. You want fucking taco? I'm gonna fold it this way. Like, that's it. Like he's the Deion and then, and then what? Fucking put two tacos together and fucking press that shit. And then, and then, and then what guys are some angry fat guys? Listen. And after that, my food, after they fuck it up, are you still gonna tip me? See, I'm still, that is so fucking true. Right there. I got, I got three kids at the house. I need to, I need, I need to smu. Yeah man, I need some money, man. I feel like I'm getting panhandled right there in the damn store versus out on the street without them. And that's, and that's how I feel too when it comes up, when I ask you to donate the shit. Oh, geez. You know what I mean? Like the rounding up and all this bullshit. Cause you know, the company's already fucking paid that money to the charity. They're just recouping that shit tax free. Mm-hmm. And you're not getting a taxes auction, you know who does that a lot too, man, I love Publix to death. Um, I really do. But Publix does that a lot. Where I was, I was in, obviously in St. Pete, the little Publix that's right there by the office on, on Alderman Alderman Road or whatever, and she was like, Hey, you know, we're doing a donation with our, one of our employees had a baby, and you know, the insurance didn't cover a lot of stuff. I'm like, okay. It's like we're just doing, we're we're doing a donation to help cover some of the costs. What a dick. Okay. You know? Um, so I'm like, you're looking around for fucking Jerry Springer. Like, fuck am I the father? Fuck no, this is, so then of course, of course it's a little old lady that's asking you, then they're like, fuck yes, I will donate. Here you go. Oh, it's like, it's getting worse. Like it's. It's driving me nuts. Like I, I, I work hard for my money. Yes. I don't mind spending money. I enjoy spending money, but damn. It's getting to the point where tipping is just an, an annoying thing. Like we should get to the point where you pay your servers enough on the hourly wage. Well, that's what I like about eliminate, eliminate tipping altogether and just everyone's happy. You know, that's what I like about Canada. It's like you don't tip in Canada cuz the servers make enough and it's just, everything's included in the food. Like, that's the way it should be. It's done. That is the way, you know, like where I, you know, I was, yeah. I was at a restaurant and I wanna say when it came time to the bill, I was like, Hey, there's no line for tipping. And she was like, no sir. Um, there's no tipping here. We, we can't accept tips. I forgot where the fuck I was at. I was like, really? And I'm like, she's like, yeah. I was like, oh, okay. This is how we should be. I appreciate it. You did a great job. This, this is refreshing. Yeah. So. Now on that note, before I thank for your service, before I get getting ready to wrap this up, I wanted to bring this into you guys. Well, um, when you guys travel, cause you guys travel a lot with your jobs when you guys stay in a hotel. Yes. Do you tip housekeeping? And I know Sheena's gonna listen to this episode cause I want to hear, I want you guys get your responses. I want to know, all right, Mike, before we get outta here, you answer that first. It depends on where I'm staying and how long I stay. For business trips, I usually stay at like Hiltons and Hamptons and I don't like them to do the, the daily cleanup. So I put the little flag up. So I don't normally tip housekeeping in those locations, but if I'm staying in a place like a resort or something of that nature, then I will tip 'em. Or if I'm there for an extended stay and I'm having them refresh the room and stuff like that, I do. But like the Hamptons and Hiltons, I normally don't, cause I'm only there for like a night, you know, or two nights cause we're bouncing around. So I really don't, I don't really fuck the room up that bad. In my opinion. Okay. No, you no, no, no. Home alone, jerking type shit going on in the hotel room. Better, better masturbations when you're lonely. Oh, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't say that. Say man, mess up. If you sleep in the bed after being in a hotel room, your shit is itching. Yeah, yeah. You're gonna definitely have some red blotches on your skin by the time says said done. I'm just kidding. But yeah, I mean that kinda my rule with them on that. Yeah. I was gonna say, me, um, I'm, I'm like Mike, I don't tip on business trips just because I don't let 'em in my room so they're not in there anyway. Cause I hang the thing on the door. Um, because I'm only there for maybe one night, two nights tops, sometimes, you know. Yeah. Mostly it's only two nights. Uh, but if I go to like a resort, like, you know, whether it be like a Disney resort or a Universal, then yeah, I'll leave money. So, okay. So then let me ask you this. What makes it so I haven't since Covid? Well, what makes it different though? Because I have stayed, I've stayed in, you know, I stayed in a lottery of resort cause I have my timeshare. They don't come for a week to come tender. Shit. But yet, I still leave. I leave money everywhere I stay. Sheena thought it was the crazy, she goes, what are you doing? I was like, well, I'm tipping the housekeeping. I said, we were here for four days. I'm, you know, they don't come in and yourself leave. Yeah, course. But even, even on a one night stay, I still leave two, $3. You know, sucker. But I, again, because not all resorts and, and you can look this up and Mike, I know you're a person who likes Googling. You look, look it up. And you will see that resorts, whole housekeeping staff, they rely on those tips. And this is what I was trying to explain to Sheena. She didn't realize that, but she happened to look it up. Like my resort, my, my timeshare bluegreen, apparently they paid their housekeeping staff pretty well, but so I, you didn't have to leave as you know, whatever. But the fact that most of 'em actually rely on these tips on the bed, and a lot of people don't know that. And I didn't know that till, I don't know, 2010 when one of my buddies did it and I was like, What are you doing? You're like, oh, I'm tipping this staff. You know, you tip your housekeeping staff cuz even though they don't come in all the time yet, they're still coming in after you and taking care of the shit that you just made dirty. Your dirty sheets, your dirty ass that probably didn't take a shower, you know, that type of shit. So yeah, a lot of, a lot of resort, a lot of hotels. Actually, the housekeeping rely on those tips that I will tip that I don't have a problem with. Yeah. Uh, and you know, the internet agrees with you, Eddie. I mean, most people say anywhere from two to two to $20 per night, depending on the cost of the hotel room. Yeah. For housekeeping. See, uh, Cheap. Yeah. I'm sorry. I have you guys muted Jeremy. Sorry, I have you guys muted. So how much night? Yeah. I never thought about it on the, like the one night stays, cuz I'm literally in and outta there so fast. Like they don't normally, sometimes I don't even have time to shower, you know? Yeah, no, I'm literally, I literally get, I get there, I crash and then I wake up the next morning and I'm packing my shit up. Yep. And I've done the same thing. I'm rolling in at midnight and I'm out there by seven, you know? Yeah. And I'm still, you know, leaving something because I know someone has to clean up, make that bed put together. Cause you, they have to reset those rooms every single time. Back to like, if it was a, now granted I've had nights where like I stayed at a Night Inn. Yeah. I'll, I'll never stay at a night in ever, ever in my life again. But you know, now, now that I'm doing okay, most of my stays are either at my resort or a Marriott. Mm-hmm. Or Hilton or things like that. Yeah. You know, there are my times where I can do that. Quote unquote be bougie mike type situation where I spend a little money just cuz I like to live, stay a little quality instead of just being cheap all the time. Um, but um, but yeah, so every time, and like I said, this was a conversation me and Sheena had. She was, she was just no astounding. She's like, what you're doing, you're just leaving the money on the B, why would you do that? I'm like, so I said, look it up. And sure enough she went and looked at me. Same thing. Yeah. I mean I feel like part of the vacation is like where you stay is part of the experience and if you get a nice room, just the higher quality bed, the bigger room, the nicer amenities, the better shower. It just makes the trip so much more enjoyable. Oh, absolutely. You know, like even though if you're not in there all day long, it's gonna be like, well I'm just gonna sleep there and shower. But Yeah, but it's different. Like the whole atmosphere is different. Like everything's different. Well they say for money, it's money. Don't buy happiness, spent money don't buy happiness. But it can get a nice ass hotel room. Yeah. No shit man. Yeah. If you're, if you're not buying happiness of money, you're spending your money fucking wrong. That's all I gotta say. Yep. You're buying the wrong shit. Yep, yep. Because I'm pretty fucking happy when I get my big ribeye sitting in my next hotel room, drinking my nice ass fucking whiskey. Yes. All right, so we're gonna go ahead and wrap it up guys, cause Nah, I can be chatting with you guys all night and, and uh, we can just, we don't, and nobody wants to have a Joe Rogan episode to, uh, to edit, so Yeah, all I'm saying is I've never seen a motherfucker find a $20 building ground and go, God damn it, another one. Yep. Exactly. Ooh, ooh, look what I found today. Yep. No, I'm usually like, oh, a sweet, another one, another $3. These things just need us, they're just the root of all evil. Yep. Alright, so if you guys guess what, I'll leave evil as shit. If you guys want, go ahead and throw out your handles and, uh, go ahead and plug your, uh, new Merc that you guys got. I saw the little fancy t-shirts now. So go ahead and plug that up and then we'll get ready to roll outta here. Do you wanna do it, Mike or you? That would be you, Brad. Nice. Well, you can follow us on the T talking about tweet machine at underscore the daily bm. Or you can follow us on Facebook and Instagram at the daily BM or go to our website@thedailybm.com or email us some nude pics, you know, whatever at info the daily pm.com. And then you can also buy our new merch, which is just a t-shirt. So fucking buy it. It's 20 bucks. You cheap bastards. I know you can. I know you guys ain't cheap on this fucking shell because you guys are buying expensive ass fucking whiskey. So if you don't over and buy a$20 shirt, then fuck you anyway. So go over there until like $7 to ship it. You can get a cool shirt, you know. Hey. So be it. All right. And with that guys, if you guys enjoy this episode of these guys, make sure you guys go give 'em a follow the daily bm, go follow 'em on our socials. Um, as well, follow us on my socials over at Whiskey and Uncensored on Instagram, Facebook, and visit the website wied and uncensored.com where we have all the post or past episodes, blog posts that are doing very, very well. And with that being said, as always, drink your whiskeys, enjoy your life. And we're outta here guys. Peace gooses. Oh my God. Have a good one.