Reinvention & The Power of Curiosity

Welcome to The Power Lounge, your go-to place for engaging conversations in the digital world. In this episode, our host Amy Vaughn is joined by Yvette Simpson, a dynamic DEIB leader, attorney, and political strategist. Join Yvette on her journey of bold choices, fueled by curiosity, and learn about balancing personal and professional goals, decision fatigue, and intentional living. Discover Yvette's career transitions—from law to politics—and the importance of self-compassion and authenticity for women. Explore finding joy in work, community support, and seizing the moment for growth and happiness. Don't miss Yvette's advice on limitless dreaming and defying societal norms. Prepare to be inspired by Yvette Simpson's story and insights. Let's dive in!

Featured in the Episode

Yvette Simpson

DEIB leader, Attorney, and Political Strategist.

Yvette’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/theyvettesimpson/

Amy Vaughan,

Owner & Chief Empowerment Officer

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amypvaughan/

Takeaways

• Reinvention & The Power of Curiosity
• Childhood Traits and Early Aspirations
• Confronting Fears and Taking Control
• Authenticity and Societal Expectations
• Practical Assessments and Financial Planning
• Importance of Self-Love and Authenticity
• The 4 S's of Authenticity

Quotes

"Experience the power of change and witness the transformation that follows." - Yvette Simpson

"Love yourself now, not for what you lack or seek, but for the incredible being you are today." - Yvette Simpson

Chapters

00:00 - Introduction

01:07 - Purpose-driven Living Insights

05:04 - Non-traditional Career Growth

10:51 - Fearless Forward Movement

14:25 - Career Transition and Inspiration

20:25 - Authenticity: Self-Love and Knowledge

26:08 - Finding Joy in Meaningful Work

26:57 - Empowerment through Self-Awareness

31:39 - Identity, Career Growth, and Change

38:26 - Surrendering to Decision Fatigue

40:45 - Balancing Sacrifices with Happiness

43:25 - Dream Life Visualization

46:16 - Positivity and Success Attraction

51:03 - Age's Carefree Perspective

55:53 - Sobriety Achievement and Mentorship

59:53 - Outro

Powered by Heartcast Media

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:10

All right. Hello everyone and welcome to our weekly Power Lounge. This is your place to hear authentic conversations from those who have power to share. My name is Amy Vaughn and I am the owner and chief empowerment officer of Together Digital, a diverse and collaborative community of women who choose to share their knowledge, power and connections. You can learn about us and join the movement at togetherindigitalcom Today. I'm excited to welcome you all to an insightful episode of the Power Lounge, as we are going to explore a purpose-driven living and authentic fulfillment through the lens of reinvention.

Speaker 1: 0:48

Today, we are honored to have Yvette Simpson with us, a truly inspiring speaker, attorney, deib leader and political strategist, someone who has allowed curiosity to inspire and lead her down many paths. Yvette is here to help us discover the essence of fulfillment by embracing self-love, seizing opportunities aligned with our true calling and debunking societal norms that limit us. Through her wisdom, we will recognize our intrinsic value and the power to manifest our dreams into reality. She's the author of On Purpose the Power of Authenticity and Intention, and the host of the fabulous the Power of why podcast. Yvette's mission is to empower personal growth and a positive global change. Y'all this is why we're already friends. We are actually looking across the table from each other in the same room. So everyone, please get ready to be uplifted, my friends, because the remarkable Yvette Simpson is in the room with us today and we're going to be talking about living authentically and achieving a purposeful fulfillment. Thank you so much for being here with us today.

Speaker 2: 1:56

Thank you for having me, amy. I think we can fairly say that we're sisters now I think friend doesn't quite capture. I think we're sisters, and so it's such a joy to be welcomed into this space with you to talk to your amazing audience about something that is really near and dear to me. So I hope we have an amazing conversation and, as always, if someone gets one nugget of wisdom or insight that helps them do things even a little differently, then I've done the right thing and I feel proud of that.

Speaker 1: 2:22

Absolutely, I'm right there with you, my friend, right thing, and I feel proud of that. Absolutely, I'm right there with you, my friend, right there with you. So this is one of the questions, honestly, of all the questions I have for you today, that I was most excited to ask you about, and that is what were you like as a kid and what did you want to be when you grew up?

Speaker 2: 2:40

So I was the kid who suffered from severe FOMO. I was the nosy kid, the inquisitive kid, so I've always been this way. So of course I'm talking about curiosity and asking questions. I was the kid that asked a million questions, right, like, if you know, you said the sky was blue. I'd say why? Over and over again. So I've been asking this question why? My whole life.

Speaker 2: 3:05

I was what my grandmother would describe as an old soul. She swore that I had lived on the earth before because I was just more adult than kid. You know, when most people were, I was watching Nick at night when I was like a kid like I'm watching, like Mary Tyler Moore, as a kid who does that, right? So I was that kid. I was also the kid that was bossy. So I was told that when I was two years old, the adults were up and I used to want to be up with the adults. I was in their face. What are you talking about? I always wanted to know. But when it was time to go to bed I was done and so the adults were still up and I would get up out of my bed and go back over and I go, go to bed, go to bed. I literally told adults to go to bed what in the world? So I always tell people who have children your kids will show you who they are from the very beginning. Don't push that down, nurture that. Because I am a boss now, I was meant to be bossy. I was meant to ask questions. It's what I do, and I was showing that really, really early.

Speaker 2: 4:03

And so I was eight years old when I decided I wanted to be a lawyer and I think my eight-year-old brain you've got a lot of women, you've got women in your circle. So I'll tell the story this way. You remember the I Want to Be books. We used to have those when I was a kid. It was I want to be this, I want to be that.

Speaker 2: 4:18

And I pulled out the book for I Want to be a lawyer and I said to the universe, that'll be me. There's a guy standing in front of the judge. I said that'll be me, but I'll be wearing a skirt. That was my eight-year-old way of saying I'm going to do this and I know that women can do it. I'm going to be a woman who does it. So yeah, I was eight years old when I decided I wanted to be a lawyer and accomplish that dream Not long after that, you know. So I was kind of in the pursuit of that and I think it wasn't about the profession of law. It was about my perception of law as a way to make change, social justice, to help people, and I knew that even at that age that I had the skill set to make an argument and to hopefully help people through that. I love it.

Speaker 1: 5:03

I love it. We would have been best buds.

Speaker 2: 5:05

Well, if that was a handful, okay, oh my goodness, such troublemakers. But in such a good way.

Speaker 1: 5:10

A patient angel, right, but in such good ways and I love that. Like you said, they didn't force that out of you. They let that be and let that flourish and let that grow and look what a little change maker and renaissance woman you became. Let's get into that a little bit more. What was your career journey like? Because I know you know you're not like you said right before we got on, I'm not like a quote unquote woman in digital, but I think there's so much about your career and your journey that is inspired, that, you know, does lend itself to a lot of what these women who are listening, who are also just professional women making their way in the world, can get from your experience and story.

Speaker 2: 5:49

Yeah, it's funny because I was on a journey of pursuit of becoming a lawyer, very narrowly focused, for a very long time, you know and did everything that I needed to do. You know I did mock trial in high school. You know I go to the library. I would read books about Supreme Court justices. I was very clear and, being the first in my family to go to college and not really having role models, I knew that I had to get that insight and that information and I told anybody who would listen I'm going to be a lawyer, I'm going to be a lawyer, manifested that thing in a real way. And then I get to the profession and I realized this isn't exactly the way I expected to do this and so, rather than suffering through it and suffering is a strong word because the profession of law is sophisticated I got to work on really challenging problems. I got to work with amazing clients and make real change, but it didn't feel like enough and I knew there was something more. But I'll just add a little note here, because I think we all know that feeling. We've all had that moment where we're like this isn't enough, I want more, and what most of us do is we're like, oh, that's crazy, you just ignore it. And what I did was I said, no, I need to listen to that. So my first career shift for real, I mean, I worked a job right out of college, moved to LA. I was in marketing because I had a mass communication degree and a political science degree and a minor concentration in business law. So the busybody in me has always been there. So I double majored and minored and I worked four jobs in college. She's always been her, she's always been her. She shows up, which she's always been her, she's always been her, she shows up. So but fast forward to law. After working for a few years at amazing law firms doing sophisticated work, I realized it wasn't enough and I said I got to do something about that.

Speaker 2: 7:37

So one of my good friends happened to be hosting a trip to Africa and that was the first real sign I had that I need to do something about this. Because I went there to support the education team to work with young people. We brought them tools from America that they didn't have. We taught them a play so that they can learn to use the mosquito nets. These kids were brilliant and impressive even at the primary level, because in Africa kids aren't guaranteed to be able to make it to secondary school and certainly not to university. So they teach as much as they can. So they say, ms Simpson, you come on in the, do you want the math room? I go, oh, they're doing advanced trigonometry in primary school. I was like, uh-uh, where are we learning English? Where are we learning to write? So I was like I went into and spent a lot of time with headmasters in the three villages that we worked with and, more importantly, when I left, those kids came back with me and I just, I mean, I'm working on cases six months back and I'm just like this, isn't it?

Speaker 2: 8:36

There's so much more. I have to do something and I didn't know what, and so you don't always need to know what, you just need to know that. And so you don't always need to know what, you just need to know that. You just need to know that you need to like something. Don't listen to, don't ignore that noise in your head, that feeling in your gut that says so. I, you know, typically I'd have to have a plan and a backup plan, and I just said I just need something. And I met with a good friend of mine who's now passed away, who was a great mentor of mine, and she said Y, yvette, you can do whatever you want to do.

Speaker 2: 9:11

So, by happenstance, miami University was looking to build a new pre-law program. It was my alma mater. They had been reaching out to me many times about ways to get me back to the university. I was like that super student, I got the President's Distinguished Service Award for Miami University as a senior how can we get you back? And so that just felt like a great opportunity, right? We never had a pre-law program at Miami. I loved working with students and young people. I was a mentor. I said I just need to get out of the noise, I need to step away. So I took a 50% pay cut left the practice of law to go and build this program at Miami University, and it was the best thing I could have ever done, because when you're in the thing, you can't get away from it, and especially when you're practicing law as a young associate, you're working nonstop, I'm working weekends, I'm working nights, I'm just, you don't have time. So I saw that opportunity as a way to step out, try something different and maybe I'd get clarity on the long range and I built that program, ran that program for five years and that was when, when it got quiet enough for me to get the wisdom and inspiration that I was supposed to run for office. And that was when I ran for office.

Speaker 2: 10:14

So by that point, if you count my marketing career in LA one, two, three I was on my third now my fourth turn, so I was already I'd done a. There was a woman's publication in Cincinnati and I was on the cover. They did on my third, now my fourth turn, so I was already I'd done a. There was a women's publication in Cincinnati and I was on the cover. They did a whole episode, a whole edition on reinvention. And there I am. And so I was 27, 28, 29, had already reinvented myself several times. Yeah, and once you get that muscle, then it just, it is easier. I think we're told that you're supposed to stay in this job, this career, forever and we're not encouraged to listen to ourselves. When we feel that tug to move and I've become very attuned to that tug and when it calls me, I listen, just move. I love that.

Speaker 1: 11:00

You just move. I think it's brilliant and I think that's why I wanted you to share that story. I know all of our listeners across the airwaves whatever you'd call them for podcasts now are all over the country. But being in the Cincinnati area and having seen you move in these ways across the city, across the country, across the years, it's amazing and it's like you're showing so many women and modeling for so many that it's absolutely possible and there's no stigma around it. There's no shame in it. It's just you feel it, you find it, you do it yeah.

Speaker 2: 11:35

And it's not without consequence. Like, clearly, taking a 50% pay cut was something that I could afford to do, something that actually served me because I needed that. That's when you really realize, like what's most important, what do I really need? And I had a freedom and a happiness for that five-year period that I had not experienced before, and it and meaningful. I mean I worked with over a thousand students. I mean in that time that I was able to help make the decision to go to law school. That impact is far surpasses anything that I could have measured at that time in my career.

Speaker 2: 12:09

So you know, it's not without consequence that when I talk to people about this I say the pursuit of your purpose is this thing, that it's a roller coaster. It doesn't happen overnight, but you can do it. You can do. It happen overnight, but you can do it. You can do it. And that's why part of the book is really about intention, because I think we're convinced that, like, somehow we have to do things a certain way and you don't, you choose every. You choose to breathe in and breathe out. I mean, I know it's an involuntary action, but you could just. I just decided I was going to do that. So if you control whether or not you take a breath or not, you certainly control whether or not you make a move. You have the ability to do it and it's weeding through and working through all of the things that we feel like we have to hold on to. That we need that keeps us from reinvention and really pursuing our purpose in a meaningful way.

Speaker 1: 12:59

I love that. Let's talk a little bit about that. Then your book on purpose, Purpose and the Power of Authenticity and Reinvention. It goes into the topic of the essence of fulfillment. Can you share what inspired you to write the book and let's just discuss the topic a little bit more.

Speaker 2: 13:16

So I have reinvented myself. I don't know how many times. Now I think I actually have like seven businesses active in this moment. It's amazing, yes, it is, it is joyful. It may not be for everyone, so, like, just know yourself, but I have been coaching, at this point, business owners, political leaders, nonprofit leaders, and I noticed a theme and the pandemic, I think, really exacerbated that that there was this shift in mindset from I go to work and do a job and then I find my fulfillment in all the things outside of work. There were people who were starting to want to, because time is short, limited, life is certainly not guaranteed. That was all, starkly, you know, in front of us with COVID. It's everything. Not only we're losing people, but how we do things change. We had to change everything and people were starting to wonder you know, what am I really doing? And that kind of break really started to I think help people. See, you do control more. We can change things because, like parents were teachers, you know, all of a sudden you got your kids at home. God bless you, amen. All the parents out there were teachers.

Speaker 2: 14:30

During that time, we all became tech people. I was working at ABC and I became my own production assistant, my own audio person. I had my remote set up in the basement. Like, we all learned different ways to do things and I think, in that moment too of stillness and maybe a little bit more time for us to reflect, we realize that, like I can, I want to do something different, like I want to find a way to marry my profession and my passion and my purpose all in one thing. How do I do that? And so I started to see this theme and so, because of that, I did a TED Talk in the middle of the pandemic, which was thank you. And after the TED Talk, folks are like you should write a book about this, and I'm like my medium is audio and TV.

Speaker 2: 15:16

I'm a talker, I'm a lawyer, I can write, but sitting down and writing a book didn't seem like something that I would be able to do. So I talked to a friend of mine and I called her editor for her book and hoping to engage her as a ghostwriter. And she said Yvette, you can write. Why would you hire a ghostwriter? Write the book and I'll edit it for you. Her name is Amy McConnell. She's a former VP of Simon Schuster, ghostwriter for HarperCollins. She's amazing. And she said to me write the book.

Speaker 2: 15:47

And so I wrote the book and she edited the book and I waited anxiously, you know, to get her feedback and she said the book is good. She said just, and we thought about traditional publishing. She said publish the book because you've already written it and you don't want to have to sacrifice the book. Let's just, you know, let's, let's self-publish this one or a hybrid, publish it and then if you want to traditionally publish future books, then you can do that. So she was just a great partner wrote the book and then um didn't want to release the book because I was nervous about every single part of it. And um, I hope Amy gets to hear this cause I love she's from Nashville, she's got this amazing Southern accent and I said she said if that released southern accent and I said she said Yvette released a birth the baby event birth, the baby birthday.

Speaker 2: 16:27

You gotta have it. Push the baby out, you got. This is the reason why babies will come out, whether you like it or not right, otherwise we hold babies in us.

Speaker 2: 16:35

I wanted to push. So, um, I released the book and I I'm glad I did. Yeah, I'm glad I wrote it. So I became an author and it was a reflection of my own experiences going through the purpose journey, the process I take with reinvention, and I had tons of people that I had coached through it, tons of people whose stories actually were more alike than different. That's why in the book we have these avatars, which are basically the two most prominent types of women I've coached through this process and they reflect hundreds of women that fit coached through this process and they reflect hundreds of women oh, interesting, that fit these two avatars. That's awesome.

Speaker 1: 17:09

That's fantastic. Yeah, we'll have to include a link in the show notes so everyone can check that book out. And I absolutely agree with you. As I would talk to members, non-members, women within my network, just folks in general, it was like the pandemic induced either a quarter life or midlife crisis, whether we were at that point in our life or not, like you said, just because of all of us looking at this potential loss of life. You know, it really kind of had all of us kind of stare down this moment, but also, because of isolation and the slower pace of life, forced us all to just take a moment and look and so for, as devastating and as difficult as it was, in so many ways, I don't know, I have a lot of folks that are still like, well, in a lot of ways, what kind of when we're going to start to see it? Over the years, what kinds of gifts and opportunities did it give? Would your book have been in existence? Probably not. No, if that wouldn't have happened, not at all. I mean, I don't even think.

Speaker 2: 18:06

I would have had the space to step out and even think about it Right, it gave me the space to do that.

Speaker 2: 18:11

My winemaking business came out of that space because I wasn't traveling as much. So I think you know I lost both of my parents in the midst of the pandemic, neither from COVID but in the midst of COVID, which was really challenging, I mean, but it did give me that crystal clear perspective. It like a lot of people who lost someone either to COVID or during COVID, during that compressed period of time where we couldn't you know, I didn't have as much access to my parents even as they were going through their struggles. My father with cancer, my mother had heart condition that popped up in the middle of the pandemic, and so that also for me, reinforced for me. So what we know now. Mckinsey did a study recently and as many as 65% of people now want their work to be connected to their purpose. Yes, they're demanding that. I agree, I agree, and so I'm now coaching workforces.

Speaker 2: 19:03

You want to keep your people ask them what their purpose is. They want yeah.

Speaker 1: 19:06

Put them in a position to do that.

Speaker 1: 19:08

Yeah, I definitely agree. I think that was the case prior to COVID, but even more so now. Yeah, we just had a that was our last event actually here for Cincinnati local chapter and we brought the Mackie group in and we had Mackie McNeil herself come and speak and such an awesome lady. And then Sarah Grace, her daughter, came and spoke, also on our last podcast episode If you want to go back and take a listen to her as well, talking about a little bit of money mindset.

Speaker 1: 19:35

It has CPA firm. That's also a B Corp. Listen, you can make money and do good. It's possible. So, yeah, yeah, it gives you cause to hope and I love, love, love. That, especially in the face of a lot of, you know, stress and trauma and that's been another thing too is I've been reading and researching and thinking a lot about, talking a lot about post-traumatic growth as well, and that's been like another interesting topic that you know I'm hoping to maybe have. We've had some clinical psychologist on as well. Dr Aquina Boateng was a past guest as well. If some of you want to go back and take a listen. She also refers to some of that too as another great reference. But let's keep on. We've got some more good things to talk about, all right, so let's talk about, you know, those good old societal pressures and norms that we all love that can lead us astray from our authentic selves. Yvette, how can we begin to challenge these limiting beliefs and embrace self-love?

Speaker 2: 20:33

Well, I mean when I say when I talk about authenticity, people think that I'm talking about the way you present to the world. Do I present as someone who is authentic? Not at all. Authenticity is about your relationship to you. Do you exist in a space internally where you feel like you're you? Do you know yourself? Are you comfortable with yourself? Do you love yourself?

Speaker 2: 20:57

And I do these talks, especially with women, and I ask them you know how many of you love yourself right now as you are the way? Not if you lose five pounds, not if you can sing like Beyonce, not if that man or woman that you've been trying to pursue comes into your life. Do you love yourself right now? And I was astounded by the lack of hands raised in the room even now, and that's young women, that's accomplished women and everything in between. And I realized that there's this deficit of self-love. Part of that is because we don't know ourselves, because we don't value ourselves and we don't understand our connection to the world. When I tell people and I mean this that the world needs you as you at your best, if I told you that you can love yourself and should love yourself as you are, because we need you as you. You don't have to be anybody else and in fact, trying to be someone else is robbing the world of you. Two Beyonce's way too much, two Tay-Tays too much. Right, we need you. And guess what? That job's already taken. And so when I start to, I always see the emotion when I'm doing training and workshop around. What if I told you that you are exactly who you're supposed to be and your gift is exactly what the world needs? That relief, you know I don't have to be anybody else. That gives people permission, the permission you should have to be who you are Now. The getting to who you are is a journey.

Speaker 2: 22:25

We talk about the four S's in the book of authenticity and a big part of that is knowing that you have a position. We talk about S, which is stand, shining your star, acknowledging the things that are good about you, the things you say about yourself, speak, making sure you're speaking positive words about yourself. We can do the A, the B and the C. B is breakthrough, and we talked, you said, limiting beliefs, breaking through limiting beliefs and old patterns that keep you stuck, and the breakthrough thing is always the thing that, like, really starts to get people, because we all have these things. Michelle Obama, arguably the most powerful woman in the world, certainly the most beautiful and sweet person in the world that I've ever come to know, suffers from imposter syndrome. Like, if she can, certainly, of course we do. Of course we do.

Speaker 2: 23:17

How do you push that down? By seeing yourself as who you really are and loving yourself for who you are. There's nothing wrong with aspiration. Aspiration is the things that I dream for myself. I want to be.

Speaker 2: 23:30

Affirmation is loving and acknowledging the things that are true about you right now, of things that are true about you right now. So, by affirming those things in yourself, I am beautiful, I am worthy, I am resilient. I've got this. I am exactly what the world needs, just as I am. Who I am is a gift to the world. There is someone who loves me and I love myself, even if they don't, but I know that there are people who love me and who care about me, and I receive that love, those things.

Speaker 2: 23:58

When you start to say those things over your spirit, it lifts you and it starts to make you believe it, because we're taking a lot in. We're getting a lot of that external. You're not good enough. There's no way you can do that. You're not pretty enough, you're not skinny enough. Nobody will ever love you. You have to tell yourself the true and positive things about yourself every day, because you're going to get so much negative and, unfortunately, our ears, our hearts and our spirits take in negativity way more. I'll hear one negative thing. It'll kick out the 20 positive things. I heard why we're wired that way Human nature, which means we have to do those things and so.

Speaker 2: 24:33

And then we talk about change. Change one thing, just one, just one. Because when you change one thing, then you've proven to yourself that you can change everything. And by changing one thing, everything is already changed. Right, if I take one step to the left, my viewpoint and my position is different, the way I see the world is different, and so we have these long laundry lists. I got to change this, got all my resolutions that are in the trash by March. Let's be real, happens to me. I like resolutions, I'm going to do all these things. Nothing gets me. So when we change one thing, then we realize that everything can change. I call it the ripple. You can put your finger in the water and then, by nature, I taught Tavia Butler put your finger in the water and then, by nature, I talk. Tavia butler. Everything you touch, you change. Everything you change, changes you. So change one thing and, by virtue of that, everything changes yeah, y'all could just sit here and do that all day.

Speaker 1: 25:27

This is why I was like I literally chased her down. After hearing you speak for the first time, I was like you need to come and be on this podcast.

Speaker 2: 25:34

You know there's something about thank you for saying that. First of all, it means a lot. There's something about being where you're supposed to be. Yeah, and I think about every turn I took all the reinventions that I had that got me here. This is where I belong in this season in my life doing this work, all the things I've learned, all the people I've helped in this moment, and there's something about I mean, you can feel it. There's something about when you see someone in their zone doing the thing, and that's what we need. That's what I say, like, imagine everybody lighting up around the world. You lighten up because you're doing the thing that you can do, bringing your gift to the world. I could be out there doing 90,000 things in this moment. I know that in this moment, this work, all the work that I'm doing is where I'm supposed to be.

Speaker 1: 26:20

Yeah, and I think everybody deserves that right. Yeah, everybody deserves to be in their place the joy.

Speaker 2: 26:25

Have you ever seen somebody like floating when they're doing the thing that they can do? It's like watching Beyonce, or take the other side, like they're in the zone, and that feeling is not only infectious, contagious, and what we should be aiming for. Work shouldn't be a drudge and you know I got to drag myself and I hate this thing. It should be something that lights you up, because guess what Light is attractive and it attracts good and more energy to you. And guess what the world needs you? There there's a role for you. There are people waiting for you. When we say, stand on the X, there are people waiting for you there. And as soon as you get there, they're going to be like oh my gosh, I'm so glad you're here. You're exactly what I needed today.

Speaker 1: 27:05

Yes, and that's such a good feeling and it's so affirming, and I think there's a challenge in there, though I think that some people want to go from zero to that.

Speaker 1: 27:14

But I want to bring it back for just a second to where you started, which was that self-awareness.

Speaker 1: 27:19

And I think one thing I learned and I think owning and running a business definitely handed me my own ass in so many ways and taught me this is that self-awareness is confidence when you are aware of yourself and you give yourself grace and, like you said, this self-love.

Speaker 1: 27:41

It does require that sense of true understanding, because the person that you are going to be in relationship the longest for the time that you're on this earth is yourself, and if you can't be your own best friend, then how can anybody else love you? And in order to step into that zone of genius, in order to step into your confidence, you just really have to know and trust yourself and don't give away that knowing and, you know, go into those places that are scary. But in order to have that confidence, I think it really does take self-awareness and knowing, and a lot of people have always asked me like you come off as so confident and blah, blah, blah blah, and there's just no big secret. It really is no big secret, it really is just knowing what are my strengths, what are my weaknesses, and really being just kind of okay with that.

Speaker 2: 28:21

Not only okay with that, but seeing that as your superpower. I talked at the Power to Pursue conference, where we were together, about patience. I'm not a patient person, so I've been asked to do all these things about patience. I'm not your girl, okay, and patience is a virtue. Amen, not her, but my impatience has changed the world. My insistence on things happening now has changed the world, and so I'm not going to try to be a patient person. I'm going to try to be patient with people is what I want to do, but not push down the fact that I think the world needs to change and it needs to change right now because we need impatient people.

Speaker 2: 28:58

Imagine if some of the biggest world changers in our nation had been like oh, I can do that tomorrow. Martin Luther King, oh, let me just. Well, we can overcome in 100 years. No, like, we need to do this right now. You know like there are people in the world who are impatient and you need to be in position to be in spaces where your impatience is of value. There are times like I want my doctor to be patient, I want teachers to be patient. There's a reason I'm not a doctor or a teacher, but for world changers. We need you to be in your seat. Something's got to happen right now because the world needs that. So when we start to realize that even the things that are quote unquote weaknesses, like impatience, are value to you, it's not a negative. Oh, I wish I was more patient. Well, think about the ways that your impatience is helpful. Maybe you're in the wrong spot. Maybe you need to be doing something where that's valuable.

Speaker 1: 29:54

I love it, I agree, I agree. Let's talk about some more societal norms that seem to hold us back. Titles and positions, society why?

Speaker 2: 30:03

society. Why, yeah? So we're born into the and it's emblematic of everything. How do you introduce yourself? I'm Yvette Simpson and I work at. I'm Yvette Simpson, I'm a lawyer. It's the first. Whenever I get that question, it's like I'm at a table and like everybody tell us who you are and what you do as soon as.

Speaker 1: 30:24

I'm like, okay, how much time you get. I got like seven, right. You're like my business card is actually at eight, five, eight and a half, by 11 piece of paper.

Speaker 2: 30:31

I have to use a digital card Cause I got like seven digital. I'm like which business you need? You need wine? Here's that car you need real estate.

Speaker 2: 30:38

Here we go. So the fact that we are asked to fit into a, we're asked to identify ourselves as a job or a career, and that people will affirm you or maybe reject you based on what you say, it causes us to feel like that's our value. I work, I am a chief officer at Procter and Gamble. Now I'm going to take you seriously. Shout out to all my PNG people love you. It shouldn't be that, because the reality is is we're more than that. We're more than a job, we're more than a position. You're more than a title. You have gifts, passions you have. You have instincts and insight that allows you to be and do so many different things, and so you get stuck because you're like I'm a lawyer. What would I do if I wasn't a lawyer? Right, like the reality is is that you're more than that. There are skills and gifts that make you astute at being a lawyer that can be used in many different places, and so that's why people get stuck.

Speaker 2: 31:36

We talk about the closed door and the open window, and I'm writing open windows. Now it's my second book. Y'all send out some good love to your girl because I need to sit my little butt down and write the book. But the whole point is that we know the door is closed. Sometimes the door is cracked open and we know we need to close it and we're staring at this door and we won't move because we don't know who we are if we're not that. If you are so identified with a title, you're like who am I if I'm not that?

Speaker 2: 32:08

And the gift that I was given by you know, wanting to be a lawyer, becoming a lawyer and realizing that that wasn't going to be enough early in my career was that I didn't say I have to be a lawyer to be a vet. My identity is not tied to that. I am many things. It also gives me the ability to say, okay, in this season I'm feeling like, you know, we change. I used to love jet setting. Honey, put me in a hotel in New York, loving it. Now I'm like, can I do that? Remote?

Speaker 2: 32:36

Because getting older, slowing down, gives me the ability to then shift and do things. Because we talk about lifestyle and really making sure you're in a space that accounts for all the things you want. It's not just about purpose and legacy those are important things but also having a life that actually brings you joy. And so if you're on to play all the time and you just like to be in your bed, honey, let's reassess this thing. So I like to shift with that and understanding that as I get older I'm going to want different things and so I need to adjust to that as well.

Speaker 2: 33:10

But if society tells you you are this and you believe that's all you are, you'll never move, and that's unfortunate, because I've coached people and talked to people who have been in a career good benefits, this is who I am, I can't see myself as anything else, and they know they're supposed to be doing something else, but they can't figure out how to get from here to there because they don't know how to not be the person that they've been introducing themselves as their whole life. You are you, you're you and you can do anything that you desire, and maybe the world needs you to do that. So think about that, yeah.

Speaker 1: 33:48

Well, and it's so sad, right? Because it's like literally like self-induced walls that are just narratives that you have built up inside your own mind, and just like doubts, fears and narratives. But I know some people might see that you know, pursuing purpose feels like it's easier said than done. What are some practical steps that you feel like others can take to align their daily lives to their true calling or purpose?

Speaker 2: 34:14

Well, I think first making an assessment of do that work about who you are so you know what your purpose is. But once you've established that, really think about your life and what you actually need. So when I talk to people and they're like, well, our kids are in private school, we've got this big house, I got to make this amount of money, okay, do you? Okay, do you? Is that a choice you've made? I understand that people have to live, so I'm not asking people to make a jump. I joke about the Beyonce when she had that release your job song and everybody start calling me and wanting to release your job.

Speaker 2: 34:51

Don't release your job if you can't pay your mortgage, not today. We can make a plan for how you get to a place where you can financially make the shift. So it's not always fast. I was in a financial place where I could take a 50% pay cut to move. Doing that was great, because now I'm in a position where I'm making even more than I would have made if I had stayed. So that fear, that F-E-A-R around. I can't leave because I need the money.

Speaker 2: 35:18

Trust and believe that when you're in a place using your gift and doing the thing that you want to do one, you will be fulfilled. That's more valuable than money, not that money isn't necessary, but that is valuable. Once you get that feeling, you will chase it. I'm chasing it for the rest of my life and I will find a way, because things we think we need we don't need. So start to really assess what are the things I really need and am I willing to live the life and do the thing that will bring me joy in order to get it?

Speaker 2: 35:50

So I made some real choices about what I really need in order to fulfill this life. Be prepared for the roller coaster and you can approach a roller coaster like this. Or you can approach a roller coaster like this hands up, mouth wide open. So go into this situation knowing it's going to be a roller coaster, but think of it as a ride where at the end of it you're going to have these bumps but at the end of it you're going to feel really great and say can I do that?

Speaker 2: 36:16

again, as opposed to, oh no, we're going up the hill, we're going down now, confronting your fear, and so I think if you feel like every single day you're going into a job or you're working in community or whatever you're doing, you're dragging it, the other side of this thing, oh my gosh, it's going to be so good for you and you will not put a price on that. So you've got to begin to make that plan, and so I stepped through with people the plan. So I'm in my job now. I want to start a business. So how do you have a side hustle for three years while you start to build your business up?

Speaker 2: 36:49

While you're doing this job, my kids are just a few years away from empty nesting. Hey, empty nesters, I feel you, I love you. How do I build myself so that when my kids go off, then I'll be able to do this thing? Or maybe it's something that I can do in tandem? So I don't assume to know everybody's individual situation, but what I know is that if you want it, bad enough, you will make it happen, and I think that's what's hard for people. They can't get from here to there. So I start people with these little exercises. Right. Take a different way to work today.

Speaker 2: 37:19

You go to the same way to work every day. Just by taking a different way to work, you realize, like I get to choose how I go to work and you get to see a different side of town, you get to see what happens when you change something. And then you start to think, well, now I changed something else. And then you start to think, well, now I changed something else and now and then you become addicted to change in a good way, because you realize I have control. Maybe I, maybe I don't want to work every single day, maybe I want to take a vacation, I'm going to take a vacation and go somewhere I've never been before.

Speaker 2: 37:51

It is completely like infectious to begin to realize I choose, brush your teeth with the other hand, just, I mean little things, it doesn't have to be a big thing. But we start to realize, like I control every single part at the power to pursue. I told everybody raise your hand, put them down, pick them up, put them down. You just made choices, you decide, and I think this intention piece, which is a big part of the book around how you set your intention and how you take the real steps to get into that place, is a big part of it, because we're not just talking about this ethereal, you know up in the air purpose. Oh, we're talking about for real. We're talking about taking real practical steps to then make that happen.

Speaker 1: 38:34

Yeah, I love it Well because, yeah, I mean, I think back through it. It was actually during a therapy session and I look back at my days in agency and as a mom of two young kids and I was thinking like how did I even get through those days working the hours I did and not sleeping, and I was like I was on autopilot. And I think, when we are in survival mode, autopilot, and I think, you know, when we are in survival mode, as many of us are, oftentimes, it is because we just we really do try to limit the amount of choices that we make, because we have such decision fatigue often and so we don't feel motivated or inspired to even think about making any choices and we surrender ourselves and every possible choice we have, from the smallest to sometimes the biggest, and where does it get us?

Speaker 2: 39:23

Yeah, where does it get us? Not where we want to be.

Speaker 1: 39:25

I look around at our world and society right now and I'm saying not where we want to be.

Speaker 2: 39:31

The world is completely out of balance because we're not where we're supposed to be. I mean, that is what I say all the time we don't need more. We need people in position doing the things that only they can do. And if we have that, the world is in balance and has everything it needs. It's so funny that we don't talk about second act until after we retire. Yes, like people are like I'm retiring and now I'm going to do the thing that I want to do, why can't you do the thing now? Right, and so we all know this thing, we live in it. We always just tell ourselves we have to do this thing and slough through it. For now and I'm not insensitive to the fact, especially young parents, people who have young parents of young kids you got a lot on your plate and also you're better for your kids when they see you at your best. So maybe you take a beat and say, well, how can I do this differently for them and for me? Oh, 100% Right, yeah.

Speaker 2: 40:24

And it's not easy, but it is definitely possible.

Speaker 1: 40:27

It is worth it. I did the same thing you did. It wasn't a 50% pay cut, but I left a bigger agency, went to a smaller company that had much more work-life balance. I was still working on big clients doing amazing work. I actually liked the structure better and had more autonomy, everything, and I was getting paid maybe 10% less and it was all worth it.

Speaker 1: 40:53

There's more currency than money. I was coming home, I was more balanced with my kids, with my partner. I was just so much happier as a human for the most part, like there were still things I was working through and then even coming into this role and owning and running a small businesses yeah, sacrifices are made, but changes can happen and, honestly, the person that I've become through those challenges and difficulties, it's all been worth it. You know it's not easy. It is not easy, but I think that the legacy you leave, the lives you impact, and I would hope that the impression that I've made for my kids and the model that I've been able to make and be for my children too, is so much different than what I was before and I literally said this, I think, on another interview that I just did yesterday. I'm like I'm so grateful.

Speaker 1: 41:37

my kids were too young to remember me when I was in my agency days, because I, you know, I would say that the people that I worked with still felt that I was very much, maybe, who I am now, but I feel like I am more of who I am now, more me than I have ever been since I was a kid, you know, and that's just a really great place and I just I do.

Speaker 1: 41:56

I this is why I love listening to you about too, because I feel that from you as well, which is why I started with the kid question, Um, and I also remember you answering a similar question at the power to pursue. But, yeah, I really want that for, especially for more women. Um, I also had a woman share that with me about. We talk a lot about, you know, uh, just all things about womanhood within Together Digital, about being post-menopausal and how that really changed things for her right.

Speaker 1: 42:22

The kids were grown and out of the house and she was basically feeling like her prepubescent self. She says the world has marginalized me. I've basically been rendered invisible, which is kind of a cool thing actually, because now I don't have to give a flip about what anybody thinks of me. I can kind of just go about doing whatever I'd like and I have so much energy and I'm not affected by my cycle and, yeah, like I'm just kind of got this new sort of energy about my life and what I want to do. But, like you said, it shouldn't really have to come back.

Speaker 2: 42:49

You shouldn't have to wait. And here's why we just don't know that we're going to get that time. You don't know that we're going to get that time. You just don't know. And guess what? Why shouldn't we live our entire lives like this? Somebody told us a real bad lie that work has to be awful.

Speaker 1: 43:04

That's why it's called work.

Speaker 2: 43:05

Somebody told me that I'm like that is the biggest lie. It is not true. You can find joy in work. You should. You should come to work feeling like you are using everything that you have, the gifts that you have. So one of the exercises I know we got time One of the exercises I encourage people to do, especially people who have a lot on their plate. So I know, I said the gas. Take time 15, 20 minutes.

Speaker 2: 43:31

Get in a quiet place, your most comfortable place, if that's like soft music. Grab your journal, close your eyes for a minute and just dream about what your life, what you want your life to be right now Like. Dream it in color 4D, what you imagine it. It is an emotional experience. No limitations. No, not if the kids were grown, not if I had money, because when we're kids we're asked all the time what you want to be. Nobody asks adults what we want to be. They say how are you going to make a living? What is your profession? What do you do? What do you want for your life? Right, dream that thing big and then write it down and then make that your life's work.

Speaker 2: 44:14

Take the first step, just that first step. Think about positions on a chessboard. We saw the chessboard out here. It made me think about it. When you move a piece it's in a different place. That first step you can't go from the front to the end without taking several steps. Take the first one and then your next move is your next step and then your next step. You get overwhelmed because you're like I can't do it all of that. You cannot do it all in one step. You can do it in multiple steps, though. Take the first one, but once you get that dream baby in your head, you won't be able to deny it. But most of us won't give ourselves even the time. I was like that early on. I had a great friend of mine who was a lawyer. He said what would you do if you weren't working? What are your hobbies? I was like not working, what's hobbies?

Speaker 1: 45:06

Hobbies. What are hobbies? I was like oh, my God.

Speaker 2: 45:10

I don't even know what I would do. It's one thing to know it and not do it. I hadn't even taken time to think about it. Think about what you want your life to be like without limitations and write it down, and then you can work the plan over many steps to get that thing done. And don't wait because none of us has promised even another minute, and that's what COVID really taught us. Is that like hey, hey, I don't want to be at the end of my life and realize I didn't get to do and be the person I wanted to be. That's the whole point of this thing, because your company will move on without you, the organizations you give it. They will change the nameplate, baby, change the security code on the computer. They will move on. And a heartbeat you. You have to be protective of you, because you are the only you you've got and you're the only you the world has too.

Speaker 1: 46:03

A hundred percent, a hundred percent. Let's go to that for just a second. For those who are going to hopefully walk away from this and take some time to practice some self-love and self-acceptance, I understand that that can be hard. For some, it can be a bit of a challenge. So how can we begin to cultivate more compassion and self-loving relationship with ourselves? For those who maybe just have never even tried something like this and it feels a little woo? Yeah, it does feel a little woo, but it's also very practical.

Speaker 2: 46:27

Like I said, we make choices about what we decide about ourselves, and if we decide that I'm only going to focus on the things that I don't like about me, then you're never going to see the real you, the beautiful you, the magnetic you, the resilient you, the powerful you, the radiant you. When people start to actually show up the way that they are, you're like a light. I coach people through work, things, but also there's always this relationship thing that comes up in the book. We talk a little bit about relationships and like for those of us, those of you I'm married now, but those who are seeking a mate, I always say you know what Light? Joy is magnetic, it's attractive. So when you start showing up as the you, opportunities come, relationships come. You know that person that you see, that's shining, bright, right, you don't care what that person does, you're attracted to that person. Be that person, don't be afraid. You're not. You. Dimming your light is not serving the world and it's not serving you. So know who you are and know how beautiful you are. Reinforce that for you. Right, the things that are negative about you, those things, they're just the other side of you and we need that balance. But that is not who you are. I'm not patient. God bless America. I've talked about this, but I don't need to be. Yvette Simpson is impatient and accept that about you, so I think it's that you deserve it. You deserve it.

Speaker 2: 47:58

I did a session and I asked everybody to say I am worthy, and there was a young lady in the back of the room and she couldn't say I am worthy, broke my heart, like we are all worthy just in who we are, of love and of good things and of grace. Grace, give yourself the grace. Oh my gosh, we will give grace to every single other person and we'll be the hardest on ourselves. These are just a few things that you can start to do and talk about yourself as you are. As you introduce yourself, you know who are you who. So I said who are you? Maybe you don't answer that question as I work at PNG. Maybe you say I am a powerful woman who is trying to change the world today.

Speaker 1: 48:43

I love it.

Speaker 2: 48:44

Yeah, I got that on my business card, did you see? I mean, that sums it up.

Speaker 1: 48:51

With wine, with law, with politics.

Speaker 2: 48:55

Maybe you change. Have a little cute little business card that doesn't have your title and your job. It's who you are. Show up as that person, but we're all worthy. So if you can't say in your spirit, I'm worthy of love and good things, a good life, I'm worthy of being seen and loved just as I am, then we need to do some work, because those are all true things that you just aren't seeing in yourself and expressing in yourself. So why focus on the things that are negative and not the things that are positive? But we're all worthy. So I think that's where we have to give ourselves permission to really embrace that, and society would like us to not do that. And society can take two seats Right. We as a society need to break up for real. Yeah, yeah, I don't even know who these people are.

Speaker 2: 49:41

We're bowing down to some society that we've never met.

Speaker 1: 49:44

We're never like they and them, they, I don't even know. I don't even know anymore. I honestly feel like I have just I'm going to brag on myself a little bit here. I think I've just spent so much of my time building and supporting and creating community around me of people that I know, I trust, I love, I support and return that love, trust and support that when I hear about the day, I'm like I don't know, I don't know these people.

Speaker 2: 50:08

I don't know. I don't know. I mean, I'm sure they're out there somewhere. They might put one in. I'm sure they're out there somewhere. I'm not putting money in my pocket to send me a Christmas card every year. I don't know they. And if I did know they I wouldn't spend time with they. No, they're not my people.

Speaker 1: 50:18

No, I'm not. I'm not giving them my time or my energy any longer. Thanks, Well, actually that leads nicely into my next question. You are definitely reminding us that we have the power to determine what we do and don't do, who we give our time, love and energy to. How can we stay grounded in our values and purpose when we are faced with external pressures or expectations?

Speaker 2: 50:41

I think it's hard, especially for women, and I think men are given a lot more permission to show up and be whoever they are, no matter how society might think that's good or bad. They make excuses for that. Women, we have to be all these things and it's never enough. You can't be too strong, you can't be too soft, you can't be. You know, screw that. You know. I just you know.

Speaker 2: 51:06

I was talking to a young lady real quick in the airport yesterday. She's in her thirties and we had this long conversation about you know all these things. She's going through from 20 to 30. I said, baby, I'm in my 40s, I'm about five years away from really not caring at all. You know, we celebrate youth for all the things that it presents us, right, energy, vibrancy. The world is ahead of you. You know that kind of thing. I take this, I take this age where I'm like, because you're just, the older you get, the more you start to realize that none of these things really do matter and that it's all a projection, it's all somebody else's view.

Speaker 2: 51:46

My grandmother used to say what people have to say about you is none of your business, and so if you get delivered a message to you that's not. You send it back. You return that thing to sender. I just stamp it. Sorry, you got the wrong address. That is not the Yvette Simpson that this was intended for. So you just send that negative foolishness back to somebody else. And so we just have to realize that we do control what we believe about ourselves, no matter what society says.

Speaker 2: 52:11

And it is harder for women, and I think the best thing that we can do is stand in our own power and make sure that people know that we are not a monolith. I love my sisters, who are quiet and caring and beautiful. God bless them. I meet them in my life. I am not her, I'm not trying to be her. Right, there's value in all the ways that we show up, and we have to declare that or we have to ignore it, what everybody else says. So you either have to be oblivious to it, right, or you have to push it against. But if you let that fester in you, you let it. It's going to internalize in you. I mean I remember like somebody would tell me like you're loud, I'm like, yeah, I'm loud.

Speaker 2: 52:50

I like being loud you think you just insulted me, you just celebrated me. There is nothing wrong with women being loud.

Speaker 1: 52:57

I love that you thought you insulted me. You just celebrated me. I love that. I love that.

Speaker 2: 53:02

You know, and guess what, for folks who say, women, you're not assertive enough, you're too quiet, we just can't be. I love that Barbie movie, that monologue. It took me, it sent me, because that's true. You know, be you, love you, and who you are is exactly who you're supposed to be. The world needs all that. Forget society. You tell society to take that package back because that's not meant for you. That's what I would say, honey, I love it. But you know, that's the beauty of wisdom and being older and that's why I wouldn't trade it. I wish I had known this and could live. I guess I kind of always have been like this, but I wish I could have really embraced it when I was younger.

Speaker 2: 53:41

And for those moms of daughters especially. Build that in those girls. Yes, yes.

Speaker 1: 53:46

Yes, I agree. I remember reading a magazine article once that talked about each of the decades of life for women and they had deemed the 40s as the age of certainty. And I read it in my 20s and I was like I can't wait to be in my 40s.

Speaker 2: 53:59

and now that I'm in my 40s I'm like really happy and excited to be here now I want to be like 80, because I want to be like Sophia, like I'm just like Sophia, grab that little purse and put it on her arm and she's on her room she's not here, I'm ready to yes.

Speaker 1: 54:13

I think I've been 80, since I was 10 years old, probably Telling the world how it is, and they want to pretend like it was a stroke that caused that attitude. But no, she's born that way. All right, I've got one more question for you, yvette, but I want to make sure that our lovely live listening audience knows that if you have a question for Yvette, that you are more than welcome to ask in the chat and that I see Kaylee, our fantastic, my fantastic wingwoman, has been amazing at dropping all kinds of links for you all to be able to follow Yvette. So if you need more of this, which I know you do, you can go and check out all of those links for her YouTube, for her podcast, for her book, for her website. All right, as we strive, yvette, to live more authentically and purposefully, what role does surrounding ourselves with a supportive community play in this transformative journey?

Speaker 2: 55:06

Everything, everything, people. I said this yesterday when I was in Chicago.

Speaker 2: 55:13

I went live for a second because I was on Navy Pier and the water and the waves were speaking to me and I had just come from a Chicago book event where people who I went to college with I hadn't seen in years showed up and I thought, oh, I get to do this because I've got a community of people who support and love me. People are everything and it really does matter who you have around you. I started to make real, real critical choices about who I let in my circle Once I realized that they impacted how I feel about me, how far I can go You've heard this Oprah says a lot, a lot of people saying this but, like, your community really impacts you. So since I was a kid you know most people know my mother was mentally ill. My father at the time was addicted to substances. Of course he became sober and stayed sober once I turned 16 and did a lot of great work in the sober community, helping a lot of people. But when I was younger, my grandmother raised me and I didn't have a whole lot of people who who knew what I wanted to do and who could help support that in a real way. So I started adopting mentors and mamas, like, if I I still like, can I have your mama, I just borrow people's mamas, I just do and aunties, and I'm now that for so many people how many nieces and nephews do I have? Because you need people in your corner who really see you, who remind you.

Speaker 2: 56:36

I talk in the book about checking your receipts as a kind of a practice, and one of the ways I check my receipts is I talk to my best friend, who's known me forever. When I'm feeling insecure, like I can't do something, she reminds me that I already did that thing and I did it really well, because you forget what you can do when you're in tense moments and I'll say, oh, I got to speak to a group, but she goes you spoke to a group that was even bigger than that. You've done this, having people who remember you, and I always check in with those people, just like I check with myself. Am I still me? Do I feel like I've changed in any way? I ask those questions because they hold me accountable to that, because the world will have you shift and I never want to be anything other than who I am. So have a community of people who love, respect you, and one of the ways that you have control over your life is asking people to exit.

Speaker 2: 57:29

You know our relationship. It's like. It's like Marie Kondo, your friend list. You have brought me joy. I appreciate the fact that you have been in this journey with me. Thank you, and now I'm going to pass you on. I just Marie Kondo'd my closet. I'm just all over, marie Kondo. I love it. I had every piece of clothing I'm like. Thank you so much for putting me through these times. You no longer fitting. You make me feel bad about myself.

Speaker 2: 57:50

I'm going to let you go now Do that with your relationships. You don't have to keep people in your life, particularly if they're not serving you. In this season of your life you can be grateful for what they were to you, but you don't have to keep them in your circle, particularly if, like I hate going to meet with that person. They always bring me down. I got to have a drink just to hang out with, like really a hard drink, just to be around you, Not a fun drink. I don't want to. I don't want to.

Speaker 2: 58:17

So keep a good community of people who love and respect you, who want to see you do well around you, and don't be afraid to tell people. I just thank you for being my friend up to this point, but it just doesn't make sense and I've always said, you know, I can want you to eat, but not at my table. I can want what's best for you but not have you sit at the table with me, and I have had people who have been in my life and folks who are just not. They're not where I am now and I will wish the best for you. I just don't want you with me at this stage of my life and I know it's hard. People probably think that's harsh.

Speaker 1: 58:59

You choose and know that the people around you your energy, your potential, your trajectory is limited by the people who are in your circle. It's either limited or it's propelled by the people in your circle, and to me that is like the most extreme form of self-love right there yeah.

Speaker 2: 59:04

Yeah, time is short, energy is limited and I just my circle has gotten so small. I used to have a lot of, it's just gotten so tiny and I used to be like I ain't got no time for no friends. No, new friends. No, I'm taking new friends, like new people who have come into my life in this season, who serve me here. I still love and respect the people who got me through before, yeah, but, but you need a new season. Sometimes new people can come in and be a part of your life at that time oh, I bet this has been so fantastic.

Speaker 1: 59:34

Oh my gosh, thank you so much. It does Always, always, always. Thank you so much for coming on and sharing your passion and your enthusiasm and your wisdom and everything. It's just again. As soon as I heard you speak, I was like okay we got to bring her in and share all of this.

Speaker 1: 59:51

I really knew that our listeners would find a lot and learn a lot in what you had to say, so I hope all of you continue to follow her, check out her book and her upcoming book that we look forward to reading as well, and we are so glad that you all decided to join us today. Until next week, I hope you all keep asking, keep giving and keep growing. Thank you for being here with us today. We appreciate each and every one of you. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.

Speaker 2: 1:00:18

Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.