Ep. 80: Embrace Your True Self: A Conversation with Guest Victoria Pelletier

Imagine rising through the ranks to become one of the youngest COOs at 24, negotiating a side hustle into a full-time gig, and all the while, maintaining a strong sense of authenticity. That's the journey of our guest, Victoria Pelletier. With over 20 years of leadership under her belt, Victoria is a master of navigating professional success and personal priorities, all while staying grounded and true to herself. 

What does it look like to lead with empathy and compassion, to redefine success not just as a material gain but also as joy, passion, and value? Victoria tackles these questions and more, taking us on a fascinating journey from her early ambitions to her current reality. A stand-out lesson is the importance of setting healthy boundaries and making time for what truly matters. Even in the face of adversity, Victoria reminds us that we can carve out meaning and joy. 

So, let's get ready to redefine leadership and authenticity with Victoria Pelletier. It's more than just a chat; it's a catalyst for your personal and professional growth.

Victoria is a 20+ year Corporate Executive and Board Director. Nicknamed the “Turn Around Queen” by former colleagues and employers, Victoria inspires and empowers her team and clients to change mindsets and drive growth in business, leadership and culture.

As someone who does not subscribe to the status quo, she is always ready for new challenges becoming one of the youngest Chief Operating Officers at the age of 24, a president by 35 and a CEO by age 41.

Victoria was recognized as one of the 2023 Women of Influence by South Florida Business Journal, 2022 Top 30 Most Influential Business Leaders in Tech by CIOLook, 2022 Most Influential Entrepreneur of the Year by World Magazine, 2021’s Top 50 Business Leader in Technology by Insight Magazine and a Mentor of the Year by Women in Communications & Technology in 2020. HSBC bank awarded her the Diversity & Inclusion in Innovation award in 2019 and she was IBM’s #1 Global Social Seller ranked by LinkedIn in 2019 and 2020. Her story is included in the book, "Unstoppable."

As a prolific motivational and inspirational speaker, Victoria has delivered keynotes discussing the importance of personal branding and its impact on professional growth; being an empathetic leader in empowering employees; the power of DEI on corporate cultures and building a life of resilience.

Transcript

Victoria Pelletier: 0:00

I think you need to lean into the things that make you uncomfortable. Without doing that, I actually think the growth will not come, and so for me, it started with small things.

Kyla Cofer: 0:16

Welcome to the Leadership School Podcast. I'm your host leadership and self-care coach, kyla Kofor. Here at the Leadership School, you'll hear leaders from around the world sharing their stories and expertise on how to lead with balance and integrity. Our goal Teach you how to be an extraordinary leader. Welcome back leaders.

Kyla Cofer: 0:43

Today I'm here to introduce you to Victoria Pelletier. Victoria was one of the youngest chief operating officers, at the age of just 24. And so over the last 20 plus years, she has learned to lead in a really remarkable way, and she's learned to really lead with empathy, with compassion and empowering the people who work for her. So we talk a lot about in our conversation what it looks like to be authentic, what it looks like to be vulnerable, and how that can have an impact on the culture that we create at work, as well as the choices that we make to design our own life. So it's a really great conversation for really thinking through how am I showing up and am I showing up in the way that I was designed to be and the life that I really truly want for myself, and doing that in a way that also makes an impact for the companies you work for and the companies that you lead. So thanks so much for joining me, Victoria, and thanks so much for listening to the Leadership School Podcast.

Kyla Cofer: 1:48

Victoria, it's really just an honor and pleasure to meet you. And it's so fun seeing you, like in Sunny Miami, and I love like technology is so amazing that I can interview people from literally all over the world and just hear your expertise and learn from you, so I just feel really fortunate. Anyway, thank you for joining me on Leadership School today. Kick us off. I'd love to hear your story. Tell us your story. What brought you here and just what leads you to Leadership School.

Victoria Pelletier: 2:10

Well, so my story; well, first of all is that I'm very open to pivot and change and going where opportunity, interest and joy it brings me. Quite frankly, the reality was when I was younger I thought I was going to be most likely corporate, potentially criminal lawyer, and I jokingly say I think that's because my mom had me watch too much LA Law with her back in like the 80s and early 90s, and I fell in love with Corbin Bernsson, the actor. But when I got to university you have to do an undergrad first before going to law school.

Victoria Pelletier: 2:41

I took psychology thinking it would help me understand those that I might be working with in a legal profession. But I worked for a bank while I was in university and very flexible environment in their contact center And I got promoted through the ranks incredibly quickly into leadership roles, into like a senior management type role by the time I was ready to go to law school. And so what I thought was going to be one year off before I went to law school, because I was enjoying the work as a leader in banking operations environment, became the rest of my career. I never went to law school.

Kyla Cofer: 3:13

So, totally.

Victoria Pelletier: 3:13

I like feel like I read way more contracts now than I might have even potentially there, and then I pivoted and changed since then. So I mean that was one pivot initially There, tangentially, if people looked at my LinkedIn profile you might go, I'm just trying to see how I put this together. It's all been since I got recruited out of banking to become chief operating officer for an outsourcing organization when I was very young, 24 years old and a new mom at the time as well, and everything since then has been B to B to C or E in a C suite or an executive capacity providing consulting, technology or outsourcing services to other clients and their customers or employees.

Kyla Cofer: 3:54

Okay, so tell me a little bit about some of those roles. So, chief operating officer, have you stayed as chief operating officer or you kind of shifted that role?

Victoria Pelletier: 4:03

I've stayed some points. I mean that was 20 something years ago Actually I can say 23 years ago, because my oldest son is 23 now. So I know exactly, and I don't know about you, but I tend to like think back on dates by milestones of my children's, your ages. And so from there I went, yes, from COO of one outsourcing company to another where I was the executive vice president. essentially, I've always stayed in at an executive level, where it's whether it's COO or it's some kind of VP VP title. I've been a CEO as well, and typically running market units or business units for predominantly now Fortune 100 or even 500 companies.

Kyla Cofer: 4:47

Okay, awesome, and then you also do some speaking as well. So tell me about what you're speaking and what you're speaking about.

Victoria Pelletier: 4:54

Yeah, that's been my side hustle.

Victoria Pelletier: 4:57

In fact, I even negotiated it directly into my employment agreement with my last employer.

Victoria Pelletier: 5:02

I started speaking, probably about 20 years ago, for almost exclusively just for business, at conferences or events where my employer was sponsoring an event or we wanted to get in front of an audience, so I would speak about whatever it is the industry or functional area exclusively And then, about 10 years ago, I started to speak a little bit more personally and the intersection, however, of my personal or lived experience and the things that matter most to me with leadership, culture and business as well. And some of that comes as a result of the fact that I started coaching and mentoring more and more people in business And a lot of them are actually women and being a part of leading the women's business or employee resource groups and also the LGBT pride groups as well, and I felt I was doing a disservice at some point when people wanted to understand my career path, why I've so driven, how I've gotten here And I realized I couldn't coach them effectively, particularly when it comes to talking about adversity and challenge or trauma, if I didn't share my own story.

Victoria Pelletier: 6:07

And so that's where the more personal, and then subsequently professional element of my speaking came in, which is about 10 years ago, and so I now speak on still lots of things to do with what I do from a work perspective being an executive. I talk about career path, what do I can attribute my career success to. But then other things that mean a lot to me, from whether it's passion, purpose, values such as human centered leadership. Culture for me, I believe, is the outcome of policies, procedures, actions, language, behavior of those within the business, DE and I, diversity, equity, inclusion to personal branding and networking and authenticity, and those pieces are some of the things I talk about most frequently.

Kyla Cofer: 6:47

That's a lot of different areas, so let's try and break some of these down. But first you mentioned there's several things you mentioned I want to bring up. The first thing you mentioned was your success and what being driven to success. I would love to hear from you. You've had these high level executive roles so much that you speak about it and you train other people on them. So when talk to other people about this, but tell me about success for you, like, what does the word success mean?

Victoria Pelletier: 7:12

It's evolved and changed for me. I think part of my why and where some of my drive comes is my younger years of lived experience. I'm born to a drug addicted teenage mother who was really abusive to me. I was adopted several years later out of that environment and so into a loving home with parents who were lower on the socioeconomic chain, and so remember my mom's saying and my mom was the woman that raised me So my mom said to me, probably when I was 11 or 12, she's like, Tori, you need to do better than us.

Victoria Pelletier: 7:40

I'm quite confident she just meant vocation, both from an education standpoint but also vocationally. My dad was a janitor, my mom a secretary, so for me success was in part defined by money. My parents had no money for us to go on vacations. I didn't get to go on my senior year like grad trip. There wasn't a lot of money. So I started working at age 11 because, although I never needed, there was no food insecurity, there was always clothes in my closet. That was it. If there was anything extra I wanted, I needed to provide for it. and so initially success was about having more from a material standpoint, and a lot of that financial gain came through more and more senior roles, and so that's how I defined it. And then it shifted for me as a result of my ex-wife.

Victoria Pelletier: 8:30

I was married to a woman

Victoria Pelletier: 8:31

prior to being married to my husband; had cancer twice, the first time when I was pregnant with my seven weeks pregnant. We found out with my younger child And although we separated, she passed away a couple years after we got divorced from her second bout of cancer. And actually when we got divorced we found out her cancer came back. So I left her everything and restarted over financially for myself at age 33. But also her health and she was only 49 years old when she passed away made me just kind of question like what's really important here? That accumulated a lot. I define my success based upon financial status and material status And I quickly realized that wasn't important because I saw how much health and family was impacted. But also I shifted to being really focused on things that bring me personal and professional joy or value, and so that is much more so now how I define success in terms of what I do and who I do it for and how I engage, both from a corporate perspective and all the other interests that I have outside of that.

Kyla Cofer: 9:32

So first of all, thank you for sharing your story. That's hard to share, I'm sure, at times, and I just really appreciate you honoring us with your story. You've been through a lot And it's really interesting to see how success the definition of that has changed for you depending on the season of life that you've been in and how we grow and shift and change. Just as we grow older. Different things matter at different times. They really do. But I'm curious when you are in a CEO role or an executive role and you're approaching that with this, the joy, passion, priorities matter to me, but you're leading a company where usually things like money and power and lots of clients and sales and things matter. So tell me what that looks like to incorporate both of those things.

Victoria Pelletier: 10:20

Well and it's funny I spend a lot of time talking to and I've been working sort of with CEO and boards on transformation in their businesses in terms of the practices or the businesses I've been working for, And so coaching them on the fact that success is measured exactly in the way that you're talking about, particularly for shareholders. So we want to see growth in revenue and profitability, but there doesn't have to be a trade-off in hiring the right and developing the right kind of leaders in our organization and building the right kind of culture. Or, because I'm also super passionate and advocate around DE&I, around doing the right thing to create a diverse and inclusive culture doesn't mean that financial performance and success metrics get traded off. The reality is there's significant business benefits to doing those things and then connecting it all with purpose. So it can be selling whatever widget it is, but find people who align with the what you're selling Like.

Victoria Pelletier: 11:18

I'm extremely like health and wellness conscious. You're not going to find me working for like a cigarette manufacturer, but for others that might make sense. So success, if from a business context, is the ways in which our shareholders and stakeholders measure us. But I think with all of these other like multifaceted metrics we need to be looking at around the purpose and passion, the employee engagement, our diversity metrics. Are we doing good for our communities, that we're working in the environment and much more broadly from it? You look at the UN's, like ESG, all the different pieces and components of that.

Kyla Cofer: 11:54

Well, because the reality is we can be happy and passionate and have purpose about things, but if we can't pay our bills, that purpose and passion gets a lot harder to find Yeah, absolutely, and it's okay.

Victoria Pelletier: 12:05

By the way, I also tell a lot of people this you don't enjoy the roles that they're in that, yes, we need to put food on the table, and so you have to make compromise at some point and it can be a choice. I am staying here now, even though I'm not receiving great joy or my values aren't totally aligned, but I have to do it to support my family And I'm going to be committed to making a change for our future, and there's nothing wrong with that.

Kyla Cofer: 12:32

No, there's not. There's really not. And I think sometimes we may judge ourselves a little harshly or judge other people a little harshly for the choices that they've made, but we can't do that unless we know someone's story and their reasoning and be willing to support them in their journey and their decisions. I'm thinking the word boundaries is not leaving my head because it really is one of my favorite words, because I talk about it a lot, and boundaries are a requirement for personal well-being, for burnout prevention, for achieving success, really. But what does that look like for you in the roles that you're taking as a CEO or executive vice president, whatever that role is for you? How are you maintaining your boundaries for your own personal well-being while also trying to really push a company ahead and help them succeed?

Kyla Cofer: 13:17

And I think that it's really I really appreciate that you're talking about how, when a company does, let's say, the right thing, like when a company is operating with integrity, with moral standards, with looking for equality, that in supporting others, you really do help yourself grow. And we're not doing it to be selfish, we're not doing it to be like I'm going to have my whole company is going to be full of all these DEI measures and I'm going. It's going to be like this perfect company at the people first leadership and all this stuff, and I'm not doing that to say, well, by doing that I'm going to make millions and billions of dollars, but I think that's the great byproduct of doing it right, is that you get both of those things. So there were two parts to that. Let me clarify. I really wanted to hear about the boundaries, but then let's move into after that, talking about yeah, really, what does that look like to really to lead a company and make those changes, to create the culture in the right ways for the right reasons?

Victoria Pelletier: 14:10

Boundaries is also a word I love and I talk a lot about how it's one of the things I attribute my I'll say life success because the reality is I don't like people to say how do you do it all as a wife, a mother, an executive? I sit on boards having the side hustle, et cetera. For me it's all just life, and so figuring out how to integrate it and this notion that you can have it all not always at the same time or not without compromise, and so for me, boundaries is meant a number of things. One, not to the confines, totally like no one's ever going to tell me how far and wide I can or cannot go. So one, it's like opening up the boundaries and the possibilities. So that's one. And then two is learning to do one of three things.

Victoria Pelletier: 14:58

with things that do not bring us personal, including our family, or professional joy or value. I either say no, I delegate or I outsource. You know, one of my funniest and favorite stories on this is when I met my husband. He moved in and I had had like nannies a nanny in the home and my children were younger, who cooked and clean and did laundry and all of that, and I just shifted actually to like I didn't need them. when my husband met, my children were a little bit older.

Victoria Pelletier: 15:27

So I was moving away from a nanny. But, to you know, having someone who did help with a number of things around the house. And he walked in, he's like, oh, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with someone doing our laundry. And I was like, well, babe, let's be clear, like doing laundry brings me no joy. So I said you can either get really comfortable with letting our cleaners do the laundry or you can do it. And we're about to celebrate 10 years together And he's still, to this day, does our laundry.

Victoria Pelletier: 15:50

So I mean, that's one on a personal level, but then also professionally, it's creating time and capacity for me. I'm a fitness fanatic, so I work out early in the morning, so my calendar is blocked before 9am because I didn't want someone booking me at eight. I look like a wet dog is my hair is still wet. So it's choices like that. That's how, for me, I've been able to create some boundaries. And then, as a leader instilling that in my team, long before COVID, I had this saying you know that there are no schedules, there are just deliverables, and you did not need to ask me for permission to work remotely, and so I've always had that philosophy.

Kyla Cofer: 16:24

Hey leaders, have you ever considered starting your very own podcast? Podcasting is a really amazing way. I want to just say for myself my own experience in creating this leadership school podcast. I have grown my business, I have learned exponentially, I've had a ton of fun and my confidence level has increased tenfold by continuing to show up and put on a really great show. If I could help you to start your very own podcast without feeling overwhelmed, without the confusion of what do I do or how do I start, without dealing with all the self-doubt, would you take me up on the offer? If so, what I want you to do is, right now, go to podcasterschool. net. You can start out by taking the quiz on what kind of podcast should you create. From there Go ahead and schedule a call with me and let's check. I want to hear about what your potential ideas are and what would make you interested in starting a podcast. It's such a fantastic way to really grow, increase your knowledge, your business and really get yourself out into the world. Take a look at podcasterschool. net, take the quiz, schedule a call with me and let me help you get started on your very own show. I really love this, by the way. It's so important to me to have good boundaries, because you get to make choices to design the life that you want. We really do. Even when a lot of our choices have been taken away, I've found that I've been able to do a lot of things.

Kyla Cofer: 17:50

I've mentioned Victor Frankel on this podcast before. Have you heard of Victor Frankel? It's familiar. Victor Frankel was in Nazi concentration camps. He survived years and years in the camps. He's a psychologist and he's written a lot of books. His books talk about theology, psychology, the practice of meaning and how we are the ones who get to create meaning in our lives, no matter our situation. He noticed that people who were able to approach their situation that way thrived. Not thrived in a concentration camp as much as you would like to thrive as a human, but still in general in our lives. We tend to thrive when we are able to make those decisions about what does our life look like and what does the meaning of our life look like. It really matters.

Kyla Cofer: 18:38

That's what you're talking about in setting those boundaries, even down to the doing the laundry that matters to you. I'm not going to be doing that. I'm going to make sure that I'm making enough money that I can pay somebody to do my laundry for me, I'm going to enter some side hustles. I'm going to do whatever it takes to do that or find someone who's willing to do it and live with me full time. We do that and we have to say no to those things. That's a priority.

Kyla Cofer: 19:01

But really allowing that to apply also to the people who work for you because it's one thing to say what you're going to do for yourself, but then sometimes we expect different of other people. To apply that to both ways is really really important. But I'm curious how do you encourage and measure deliverables by also allowing people to have that schedule and that flexibility? Because I know it's possible, I've seen it be possible, but I think let's spell it out. I think it's important because I think that's a question that a lot of us ask is, yeah, but people aren't getting the jobs done or we're not meeting our goals. How do you do both of those things?

Victoria Pelletier: 19:42

It's complex. I would suggest that this is easy by any stretch. First, i will say I have had to tell my employees do as I say, not as I do. So I will tell you my choice is to work. I very often work 60 plus hours a week, my choice. And again, I do a lot of different things, so that's my choice. Also, when I go on vacation, I check my email. I do not want to come home to a thousand emails in my inbox. I would rather quickly scan quick one-liner response, file, or delete. That's my choice. I don't expect that of my employees. So I'm really clear with them as I say this. It's a do as I say, and again, that's my choice and I respect their choice. If they want to put their phone in the hotel safe, amazing, have at it. So that's one.

Victoria Pelletier: 20:31

But then two around how do we measure deliverables? I think, going back to how is success measured in an organization, it's very different by the different types of roles you're in. If you're in a production type environment or if you're in a contact center, it's very easy to measure that. You're producing X number of products or widgets in the manufacturing environment. If you're in a contact center environment, it's how many calls are you taking, the length of calls? but, really importantly, are the customer satisfied with the kind of service that you're delivering? Are you showing up on time or are you adhering to your schedule? There's easy ways to be really clear around how success is measured. And then deliverables. Where it gets in that gray zone is when you're not in the two types of roles I talked about, where maybe you're in a client management type of environment and so you've got response times to clients. Y ou've got to show up to meetings. You have to be creating value for the business and for our clients at the same time. But sit down and really articulate that and that this is how we're going to define deliverables and success in this role.

Victoria Pelletier: 21:33

Where people aren't meeting those, I think it's a result of potentially job fit. And so as a leader, you need to be really tuned into that and having conversations, under-skinned skills, under-skining the desires and objectives of the employees as well and matching that. But at some times it's the opposite. The employee needs to manage my expectations. So I might say this is the deliverable. I want you to meet this commitment to our clients, to your colleagues or to myself, but manage my expectations. If what I've said and it turns out it's going to take much longer than the 40-hour work week, then you need to tell me that. And we're going to reset those expectations to the extent that we can. Now, I've been in a B2B environment most of my career and clients dictate a lot of times, and so sometimes we're struggling. I'll acknowledge that. But it's about having those very open dialogues.

Kyla Cofer: 22:27

Yeah, so do you when you're interacting and having that open communication. Tell us on day one when you've hired somebody, how are you encouraging them to have that open communication with you and be able to feel safe enough to come tell you Hey, my boss expects us to be done in 20 hours, but it's gonna take me 60 and I'm terrified to tell her. You know, like ha, tell me, how are you creating and building that culture where people can have a good discussion about what expectations really are?

Victoria Pelletier: 22:55

So, through the recruitment process, they should already have a very good sense. Like I'm known for my radical candor. So for your audience who may have read Kim Scott's book, I was practicing this long before I probably had that vernacular and that's being completely direct and transparent, but from a place of care and compassion, and so that's my style. But I also want to be incredibly transparent around what it looks like coming into this role. So I'm really clear in the recruitment process: this is what the role entails, this is how it's measured, here's the environment. I do try and lay out I want people to come in eyes wide open, to the extent that I can, or I have awareness of what that is, so they know that coming in. But that is also created trust in our relationship right off the bat. Like they understand, you know the way I operate and I also commit to regular one-on-ones with my team where I say, hey, this is our committed calendar, we're going to make sure that we have that conversation, and so for me also, those are Opportunities to have conversations about performance and expectations and not just wait until the annual performance cycle. So we're having that conversation and I had to shift.

Victoria Pelletier: 24:05

I wasn't always as either vulnerable or Authentically transparent and open, and early in my 20s, when I became an executive, I felt like I needed to show up with this mask as a young Female executive the only one, not no less, at the table. So I was afraid to like, be vulnerable, show emotion and do some of this. I had to learn and pivot, quite frankly, some of my leadership style. But now that I do, that, like this, creates amazing employee engagement and clarity around expectations and Performance and then growth and opportunity for the employees.

Kyla Cofer: 24:43

It's really something when your leader can be vulnerable and share their own stories. It makes well for me. When I've been in those positions and following somebody, I have felt safer and I have felt like, okay, I can trust this person. So it really builds this element of trust that when you can trust the people you're working with, you're willing to go a lot further and work a lot harder.

Victoria Pelletier: 25:02

Yeah, exactly. That's why, when we look at a measure, success has to be looking at employee engagement, retention, those pieces, because that actually drives again going back to what's the right thing to do versus actually how it drives Amazing business outcomes around productivity and all these other metrics, and so I think I wish more leaders recognized that.

Kyla Cofer: 25:23

Yeah, tell me just briefly like I imagine sharing and being open when you first started out was a little bit scary. Tell me how you push through that.

Victoria Pelletier: 25:30

I think you need to lean into the things that make you uncomfortable. Without doing that, I actually think the growth will not come, and so for me, it started with small things. Like I knew I needed to build a better relationship and rapport with my employees, so that meant I didn't walk into a meeting and go straight into the business agenda. So I needed to be conscious. I'm gonna take and talk yourself talk. I'm gonna take the first five minutes walking in to talk about what happened on the weekend and get to know a little bit more. So that was just like for this eight type personality that I am to like want to dive. So it was from.

Kyla Cofer: 26:03

I must have driven you crazy those first five minutes must have been about like five hours.

Victoria Pelletier: 26:06

I'll talk used to not be like innate at all. Now I do it like I talked to strangers from the elevator, like I just it's who I am now. But that wasn't me 20 something years ago. Even things like saying you know what, I don't know what I don't know, like, and being okay to say as a leader, like I don't have all the answers. You know we're here as a team. We bring different skills and life experience altogether to the table, so let's solve it together. I actually just think being vulnerable and open and saying I don't know, but we're gonna figure this out and we're gonna make a commitment to get it solved, like that in itself breeds trust. So again, that goes back to you. I wasn't comfortable in my 20s doing that at all.

Kyla Cofer: 26:40

I wanted to pretend like I knew all the answers a Lot of us do, because we want people to see us. You know, even past your 20s, even as an adult, we want people to see us how we want them to see us. Like we want to create that opinion of ourselves. We like feel like we have some control over that and we want people to see us as competent and that we can hack it and now we're capable and that they hired us like they should be proud that they hired us because we can get this job done. But some of that, that pride, comes in the doing and in the acknowledging I'm not sure, but that's not the thing that draws people in. It's not the I'm not sure. It's that I'm gonna figure it out and we're gonna work together to solve this problem And I'm gonna lead you there to find the solution.

Victoria Pelletier: 27:24

Yeah, and this sort of leads me to another Important piece that I think is critical to our success is around a personal brand and and so sort of developing that, yes, you can be known for whatever your subject matter expertise is, the eminence that you have in an industry or function. But then there's this who are you as a person? And so that in itself breeds trust in others. So if a deadline slips or you have to say I don't know, they're confident, and not only because you're an expert in this space, but because you're very aligned to how you shown up and you curated, authentically, the persona or the personal brand and what people know about you.

Kyla Cofer: 28:02

Absolutely and, let's be real, like the only reason we ever make any progress is because we've said we didn't know something and we've had questions about how to do something. Right, like that's how progress happens, is I'm curious and I think we want to go over here, don't know how to get there, but we can. I love stories of hearing about Walt Disney and when Disney first started out and they'd be like we have this idea to do something and they're like, well, that's never been done before. Well then, let's do it. Like we don't know how to make things move, and they said, well, we're gonna find a way. And they did. And they always just dream way beyond what they ever thought was capable.

Victoria Pelletier: 28:32

Yeah, exactly.

Kyla Cofer: 28:34

So, Victoria, you've kind of mentioned it several times, but if you had one piece of advice to give, what would that be?

Victoria Pelletier: 28:41

One is hard.

Kyla Cofer: 28:42

I know right, it's so mean. I'm so sorry Yeah.

Victoria Pelletier: 28:45

I'm like oh, what is that? Authenticity is critical, and I say that because then it actually touches many other points. Authenticity and being true to yourself and what you want, your desires, your passion, the things that bring you joy, but also authenticity and how you show up to the world, as we've just said, like that breeds trust and builds relationships with others, and I think so many of us are afraid to do that, whether it's rejection, lack of acceptance, not fitting in, whatever it is, and so we don't either follow authentically what we want or show others who we are. So that's the thing I wish I my 40-something-year-old self now; and I always talk about age because I really do think there's a lot that's come in the lived experience I've had in the years that I've had. That makes me much more confident in that now. So I'd go back and tell that 20-year-old what I listen to myself. I don't know. My kids often don't listen to me. Now they're like yah yah mom.

Kyla Cofer: 29:44

A lot of times we don't have. You know, we have to hear things a lot before they really soak in and before we understand them, and we have to come to our own journeys on our own right. How many times have you told somebody something like if we only did it this way, and then three years later, they've been like, well, if we had only did it this way. You're like I told you that three years ago. That's right. We have to kind of figure it out for ourselves And that's just part of the journey is learning these tools, hearing the words, hearing other experts, people who've been there and who've done that and who've been through hard things, who've made mistakes, and understanding that we're all still in our own journey, figuring things out, even into our old years, which neither of us are there yet, but we are getting there. As we're growing, we figure it out.

Kyla Cofer: 30:36

Victoria, this has been really nice And I just really appreciate your vulnerability. And I appreciate hearing how you have taken that vulnerability and use that to transform the cultures and really drive forward change, because it's not just about that bottom line, even though you are pushing that bottom line further. You've actually made a difference in the world culture as a whole by prioritizing things like diversity, inclusion, equity, authenticity. Is there anything else you would want our leaders to hear before we wrap up?

Victoria Pelletier: 31:05

I sign a lot of my social media posts with two hashtags, and one is unstoppable and the other is no excuses and very connected. And so in the boundaries piece around no one telling you how far and why you could go, like the audience to recognize, like you're the CEO of brand you and not only what you choose to do and how you show up in the world. But then the no excuses piece is around the choices we make and, as we said earlier, you might need to make choices at certain times for certain reasons, but they're yours. But then the other thing is recognizing that, like challenge and adversity is inevitable and we can choose how to respond.

Victoria Pelletier: 31:45

It doesn't mean like I'm a crier I watch like Charmin commercials on TV. I'm sure I'm like no Humane Society with Sarah McLaughlin singing will bring down the tears Right. And when I say no excuses, it doesn't mean we can't feel the emotion in that moment. But I then have a choice in terms of how I'm going to move forward with a challenge or the adversity. So I'd leave your listeners with that notion of unstoppable and no excuses towards whatever their journey looks like for themselves.

Kyla Cofer: 32:13

Yeah, and taking really ownership of your own life that you get to be in charge. That's awesome, Victoria. Thank you so much. I have so appreciated you joining me today and sharing your story, and just thank you for being here on Leadership School Podcast.

Victoria Pelletier: 32:27

Thanks for having me.

Kyla Cofer: 32:31

So I started this podcast because I wanted to learn and grow in my leadership journey and I have been so incredibly inspired by the guests and the conversations. So once the interview ends, I actually keep the conversation going because I have found that sometimes the richest part of the conversation is when we feel like the interview is over and we can just kind of have a relaxed, more casual conversation. Also, if you've noticed, if you've been following this podcast for some time, I used to ask every guest two questions What does integrity mean to them and what does balance look like to them? Well, I haven't stopped asking those questions. We're just putting those over on our Patreon page. So go check it out at patreoncom slash leadership school And for $6.50 a month you can support this podcast.

Kyla Cofer: 33:18

It takes a lot to produce every single episode and, honestly, I can use a little bit of support. So anything that you're able to contribute would really mean a lot to me and would be able to help me to continue to bring these high caliber guests in to have conversations on what does it look like to be an extraordinary lead And how do we practically do that? So those conversations are continuing over at patreon. com slash leadership school where I'm asking guests some extra questions, some bonus questions. You'll get some bonus content over there, so be sure to go check it out. Thanks so much for your support and thanks so much for subscribing, listening and sharing this podcast. It really does mean a lot and I'm so honored to show up here in your podcast feed. Hey, thank you so much for listening. If you like what you heard and you want some more tools and resources to help you on your journey, go check out kylacofer. com/ free stuff.