Glass Ceilings and Sticky Floors: Shatter Limiting Beliefs - Redefine Success - Chase Big Dreams

Unlocking Your Potential: Is Coaching the Key You've Been Searching For?

February 12, 2024 Erica Rooney

Let's talk about shattering ceilings!

This episode gives you the FOUR questions you should ask yourself if you are thinking about getting a coach - but its SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT.

It is also the deep questions you should be asking yourself on a regular basis - such as - am I really living the life I want?

Here is the deal: Women are constantly juggling career, family, and personal growth - and we so often put ourselves LAST.

This episode is going to give you insight on how to put yourself first, and is a must listen for anyone questioning their current trajectory or seeking clarity on the next step towards fulfillment! 

#coaching #clarity #growthmindset

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Have you ever found yourself laying in bed, staring up at the ceiling at night? Just totally unable to sleep. Wondering is this as good as it gets? If you're an ambitious woman, juggling all of the things, family, a career and your own personal aspirations. Here's the deal. It can sometimes feel like this is this never ending marathon. Leaving you stuck. Bone tired and unsure of what your next step should be. Y'all I have been there. I have done that, but today I want to talk about the power of coaching and how it can help you navigate the complexities of work of life and everything in between. Now I'm a firm believer that coaching is for everyone, but not necessarily all the time. It is a nice to have, and it can and will accelerate your success. If you find the right coach for you. But before you make this investment, because it is an investment, let's talk about the four questions you should ask to determine if coaching is the right step for you to live this big and extraordinary life that you deserve. You are listening to the podcast from now to next. The podcast that empowers women to get seen, get heard and get promoted. I'm your host, Eric Rooney, and I've made it my mission to help you break free from the sticky floors. Those limiting beliefs and toxic behaviors to bust through the glass ceiling. I'm obsessed with all things, growth and abundance. And I'm here to talk you through the tried and true secrets to get you to level up your career and your life. We talk about the hard stuff here. Imposter syndrome, perfectionism, fear and burnout. So pull up a seat, pop in an ear, bud, and let's dive in. So before I accept any new coaching client, I always have what I call the clarity call with a perspective client. And I do this because I want to make sure. That number one. The person. That needs coaching on an issue is an issue that I'm qualified to help with. And number two, that the person is actually coachable. So I cannot tell you how many times I have seen people ask for coaching and pay for coaching. But not really want the advice, not want the mentorship and the clarity that comes with coaching. Now instead they've wanted someone to tell them that they are indeed the person who's in the right, that they are not making the mistakes, that it is the other people. It's not their fault that they're stuck. It's their boss. It's their partner. It's their family, whatever. I'm going to tell you right now, that is not what coaching is about. That is why coaching is so powerful because it really is about the internal control. So the number one question that you need to be totally honest with yourself about is simply. Am I coachable. And I want you to think of it this way. Have you ever had a really bad day and something just really frustrated you to no end. Maybe your boss didn't respond to you the way you'd hoped he would about a new idea that you had, or maybe one of your new direct reports produced a less than ideal result on a project. And you come home to vent to your spouse or your partner. You know, sometimes you just want somebody to hear you. You just want somebody to listen. You want someone to vent with? You don't necessarily want a solution to the problem. But then that partner starts asking questions and dishing out advice. Coaching is not that. And if you are looking for a vent session, it is not what you need. If you are going to fork over the big bucks for one-on-one coaching or even group coaching, which is traditionally a little bit more cost-effective cost friendly. I want you to really work, to remove your own ego and ask yourself, am I coachable? Because here's what you need to know about coaching. Coaching isn't about someone else. Solving your problems. It's about working with you to unlock something inside of you to elevate you to the next level. But to do that, you have to go deep into those sticky floors, deep into what is holding you back. And that work. The work of addressing your own shortcomings or areas of growth. It's hard. Y'all. So here's the deal. Coaching is never, ever, ever about the other person. It isn't about your partner. It isn't about your team or your boss. It is 100% about you. Because you can only control you. You can't control someone else's emotions, actions, or reactions. You can only choose your emotions, actions, and reactions. So are you coachable, be honest with yourself. I know the first reaction is to really say, ah, Duh, of course I am, but this issue, it's not about me, girl. It's not about who the issue is. It's about the coachability factor. The more coachable you are the better, but if I'm real with you being coachable takes practice because you have to be able to remove the emotion from the feedback that you get. And you need to be able to look at it objectively. But here's the good news. If you've answered, you know what? I'm not great at that, but I want to be better. That's all you need is just that desire. And that acknowledgement. That. Okay. I'm going to work on being coachable. Now, so often coaching is the place for that, because if you can go in and establish like, Hey, I really am not great at this. A solid coach will be able to help you work through some of those barriers and grow. But now once you've asked yourself, if you're coachable, the next question you need to ask is am I getting what I want out of life? It is that broad and it is that simple. If you are rocking and rolling in life, getting promotions, feeling cool, calm and collected. Amazing. You might not be in. In the need for a coach right now, you might be in a really solid place in your life. And this is when coaching teeters more on the nice to have lists. Then the must have list because if you're not independently wealthy and you didn't win the lottery today, a few intentionally chosen self-help books with focused attention on taking action. That might get you where you need to go, but if you aren't quite getting what you want out of life. If you are not reaching your personal and professional goals again, if you are feeling stuck. That is the right time for a coach. I am a big believer that everyone can use a good coach and a good therapist at all times. And I will share with you why with a recent story, just from my own life. Now you may or may not know, but I am looking to get on more stages in 2024. This is one of my big goals and it's to help increase my stage presence and get my message out to more people. So I'm working on my speaker reel. Which is quite an investment y'all I believe it's going to pay off big time down the road. And when I started working on this reel, I invested in a coach and y'all, I am a coach, so I know the investment. And when you are getting in paying for a coach, It is an investment, but this one coach's mine. I did what a lot of people do. I hired him to help me with one specific problem area where I felt stuck. I wanted exact guidance on how to produce the perfect real, and you know what he did. We covered that for sure. A good coach always makes sure that you get what you need, but he also challenged me to think bigger and dream bigger. And y'all, this is what I do for a living. I challenged people to three X, their current goals, and to live these big and magnificent lives to stop selling themselves short. And you know what I was doing. I was selling my own self short. Because here is the real deal. You cannot see the label when you're inside the jar. And I was in the jar, my coach, Eric, he read that label to me and y'all, my mind was blown. So now I want to ask you. How does this level, this version of you feel, and that's the third question I want you to ask because for so many of us, we are constantly chasing after the next thing, the next achievement, the next accomplishment. The next promotion, the next level. And we never stop to ask ourselves, how does this feel for me? And is this what I want to feel? Well, let me dive into that. I chased success and achievements. Like it was my job y'all and each win. And every accomplishment I got that dopamine hit and I got back to work on the next goal. I would only stop just ever so briefly to acknowledge my own success and wins. And then I was back to the rat race. I was at my all time career high and on the outside this level of success that I had achieved. Married a nice house, two kids, great spouse. All those things looked picture perfect on the outside. Y'all, it was a poster child for the gram. But guess what? I wasn't happy. In fact, I wasn't just unhappy. I was miserable. And that's why this question, how does this level of you feel is so critical? Because if you don't really slow down and stop and feel your feelings. And think about how it's going for you really, you will wake up one day and you will realize how miserable you are. Now I did not have a coach at this point in my career. And when I look back, I really should have. But when I asked myself, how does this version of me feel? If I had asked that earlier, I would've saved myself so much grief and so much heartache. So take a lesson. Don't be like me. Make sure that you are stopping and taking time and asking yourself expecially. If, how you look on paper and how you look on the Instagram is picturesque. Ask yourself. Do I like the way this version of me feels. And next, I want you to ask yourself, am I reacting to my life? Or am I shaping my life? And this question is a game changer because life moves fast. If y'all have kids, if you're a parent, you know how fast life moves. And sometimes when things get out of balance and they get out of whack, you end up living a life where you are reacting to everything around you. Rather than celebrating everything around you. Now you don't have to live a life with intention and purpose. You really don't. You could live a life where you do nothing but react to the world around you. But doesn't creating the life you want to live. Sounds so much more fabulous. Now, I don't want to turn this into a doom and gloom podcast. But y'all we don't get any second chances in this life. This is our one life and it's what we have to live. And you've got to create the life you want. You do have the power to do that in a really good coach can help you cultivate that life. Be the captain of your own dang ship. That's the message right there. Now, I'm sure you've heard and read about all the studies that have been conducted on people who are older in life and they talk about regrets. And it's been found and shown time and time again, that people do not have regrets about the things they did. But rather about the things they did not do. So my question is, are you doing the things you want to do? And if not, why not? So often we do not do the things we want to do because we don't think society will approve. We don't think our parents will approve or our partner or our team, our boss, whoever. So you don't do the thing that's burning inside your heart that you feel called to do. You don't go chasing after that big and scary dream. You just keep your head down. You go about your day, you do what you think you should be doing. And that day turns into 364 more days, which is then a year. And the time passes. That is a fact. That is a fact y'all that no one can deny. Think about Jeff Bezos. Okay. He had a great job with benefits. This is pre Amazon married kids live in his life, doing his thing. And according to society was checking all the boxes. If he did not go out there and actively seek out his dream y'all we would have no Amazon. There would be no one-click. Can you imagine? For real though. Jeff could have lived out his life and no one would have been the wiser. But as he said in an interview one time, he knew that if he didn't at least try out this internet thing, he would regret it. He knew that he could always come back and find a job if he needed to, but he wanted to take a stab at it. And aren't you glad he did? I know I am. Amazon changed my life. But my point here is he stopped reacting to his life and he started shaping it. So the questions you have to ask. If you're thinking about a coach. Is number one. Am I coachable? Number two, am I getting what I want out of life? Number three, how does this level, this version of me feel. And number four, am I reacting or actively shaping my life? Now, those are hands down the best questions that you can ever ask yourself. If you're thinking about working with a coach. And I'm a huge proponent of coaching. Obviously I am one, but I just want to leave you with this. We can all use coaching throughout our lives. Some people haven't for years, some people have them for seasons, but it is a game changer. When you find someone that can help elevate you to the next level. And remember you cannot see the label when you're in the jar. I resisted coaching for so long because I thought this is what I do for a living. I don't need anybody to tell me how to do this. But that was not true. Not even for me. Sometimes you just need that person to help you see what you cannot see to help you dream bigger and think grander. So, if you've been on the fence, I'm here to tell you that this is your nudge to go get out there and find yourself a coach. Find one that you really jive with. Take a few calls. Whatever you do, don't put it off because you all the time is going to pass anyways and you are going to be so glad. That you did this for yourself. You are going to be so thrilled because you will start getting what you want out of life. You will start loving how this level of you, this version of you feels you will be living in congruent with, with yourself and you will be actively shaping your life. All right, friend. Thank you so much for joining me today. If you recognize yourself in any of these stories, or if you felt yourself, nodding a law, what are you waiting for? Take that first step. Reach out for coaching. You could work with me. I can refer you to one of my many fabulous coaches in my network. But coaching or group coaching is what can help you. Move from stuck to shattering ceilings. Now now's not the time. That's okay to just bookmark this episode for when you might need it. Otherwise it is time to stop putting a ceiling on what is possible and it's time to start breaking through them.

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