Mind Over Matter: Mindset Development
Venting about life while trying to navigate through it and sharing what I’ve learned with the world through enlightening conversation. This podcast was made and carefully curated in the essence of myself Deja Wallace. I will take you on my journey of self-discovery through a video journal-type podcast that guides you to self-discovery as I evolve with every episode. Mind Over Matter is the power to govern how you feel internally through mindset development. This podcast is essentially for dreamers, deep thinkers, optimists, and anyone who’s on the journey of self-discovery. RATE COMMENT SUBSCRIBE
Mind Over Matter: Mindset Development
Be The Change You Wish To See (ft. John Johnson)
On this week's episode our special guest, John Johnson joins us in discussion. This motivational speaker, celebrated CEO, and community advocate leads us on a thought-provoking journey, challenging us to appreciate what we have, rather than continuously wanting more. Listen as John shares his inspiring journey of giving back to his community and how it ultimately led to the birth of his own business, John Johnson Speaks LLC.
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DEJA @deja.waja
If you had all the things you prayed for yesterday and you look at the things you had today, how many things would you have in your present moment?
Speaker 2:That's good, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:A lot of people. They don't say thank you. They only go to God when they need something. I need this I need that, I need this, I need that. They don't really like say thank you, appreciate life.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes.
Speaker 4:Appreciate the breath. Yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 1:So it's important to have that mindset of abundance, because when you are asking God for these things, you're coming from a place of lack, so you're actually multiplying the lack of, but when you say thank you for this, thank you for that, you're actually multiplying your abundance. Yes, yes, and that's something I learned that was very powerful and really changed my life.
Speaker 2:I love that. That's good. You just put me on too. That's good.
Speaker 3:The mind of a man is magic, I do magic. The mind of a man is magic, I do magic. The mind of a man is magic, I do magic. The mind of a man is magic, I do magic. When you are asking for this. The mind of a man is magic, I do magic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Welcome to Mind Over Matter baby, I'm your host, deju Alice, welcome. If this is not, welcome back, I appreciate you. Shout out to you, royal, you loyal, I appreciate you. We have a very, very special episode, episode 78. And I have the lovely. I have a co-host today with me. Okay, we switching it up for y'all. I didn't see that coming, huh.
Speaker 3:We got a co-host.
Speaker 1:Big Desi Des in the building, destiny, the stage. Aw, hey, y'all Damn the whole government girl. I had to let them know If you watch episode 70,. This is a familiar face, familiar voice for my audio listeners. And I'll also have another returning guest with me. We have John Johnson in the building. Good, let's go. Big CEO, mr Optimist himself.
Speaker 1:And I'm so excited for this episode. This is going to be, I would say, inspirational, because he is a motivational speaker and he is specialized in communications, emotional intelligence and speaking just life and clarity onto other people. So, yeah, it just embodies what Mind Over Matter is about, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So I'm excited to have you on. Let the people know about you. Give them a little you know. Let them know where to get connected.
Speaker 2:For sure, for sure. Yo, I appreciate you. Shout out, shout out Deja. Shout out Mind Over Matter man, it's lit. Shout out Destiny, it's time meeting.
Speaker 2:Man, I'm excited to be here, man. This is what it's about. You know, energy is important and I knew from first time connecting with Deja. The platform is dope, you know, so that's important. But you know about me, that was a generous intro man. I'm grateful. I'm a servant man. I'm just here, you know, happy to be alive, and so for me, hoping to get a little bit into the story, but we've really done a lot. Just giving back to youth, I think, would be the focus. Giving back. I'm big on community service perspective and, yeah, I would say, just a servant. But more recently we did acquire my LLC and so I'm currently a business owner and as of this year.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's big, that's big, that's crazy.
Speaker 2:Appreciate you.
Speaker 1:Of John Johnson.
Speaker 2:Speak John Johnson Speak LLC. Yeah, so that's official, but we've been doing the work, similar to that you know, for years now, so this year we decided to take it to that level.
Speaker 1:So that's you, yeah, that's you Just big congratulations to you, appreciate you. That's exciting.
Speaker 2:That's dope, that's dope. So, yeah, definitely stay connected. We'll put the socials out before we leave, but you know John Johnson speaks on everything. But yeah, just excited to be here. Let's get it, we're gonna chop it up.
Speaker 1:Yep, yep, yep, so let's get into this episode. So today we're gonna be talking about how I believe that everything is connected and I want to get into that, and it's just whether or not you have that mindset when you're able to tap in with the abundance in this world. So the purpose of this podcast episode today is to inspire and for you to find your power in your story, because your story, specifically John, is very powerful. Thank you, you are the oldest of eight. Appreciate that?
Speaker 2:yes, Oldest male. Oldest male. Oldest male of eight Shout out my big sister, shout out Mika, shout out, mika, that's not.
Speaker 1:That is not for the faint of heart. 100%. Kids are not easy. Yeah, fucking kids honestly. But at the same time it's like I grew up around a lot of kids and it may mean I want to have kids honestly. It's not easy. Just it's like you get no breaks. Yes, you get no breaks. How was that growing up?
Speaker 2:Definitely, definitely man, and shout out my sister, mika, you know, oldest sister to Mika, aka Radiant Goddess, queen, really responsible for a lot of my growing up. So, man, speaking of how it was, so I grew up with a woman, so a single mother, and my oldest sister, right Absence of my father, I'll say, and so that was huge for me. I am one of eight oldest males, so how it was, really a lot of my life was just about giving back and setting an example, leading by example, a lot of responsibility. So when friends were out after school and stuff, I had to come home, pick up my siblings when they was doing different things, participating programs and stuff. I had to be home. But then also part of a huge part of my childhood was church, and so I grew up in church, you know, religious and just kind of we bounced around to different churches over the course, but Sunday morning was a thing like in that Wednesday, bible study and then cleaning the church Saturday. So I was heavily involved with the nature of my story, which I'm grateful and I appreciate you mentioning and that means a lot. So I'm hoping as we get into it, you know, we'll chop it on that front, but growing up. That was a huge part. So that also though you know it required a lot, but it also taught me a lot right. So, like I had a lot of programming, getting involved, you know, exposure with adults, it's a big thing for youth.
Speaker 2:Right now we see a lot of lack of respect, a lack of connection. You know people don't really know, oh, they too old, they not an ungeneration, they don't understand, they ain't lived through this time. And it's like yo growing up, like my aunties and uncles from church help me down, you know, and show me the way, and they could check me just as much as my mom, in fact, if they did check me and my mom found out, it's double like. So that was a little bit of growing up. And then, yeah, just being an older brother came with a lot, and I'll leave this here real quick to get spicy, real quick, like it really turned into at times which I explore now with my mom being a husband. That's deep, you know what I'm saying. That's deep, like I like to get real like that with the students I work with and even adults, because that's what happens sometimes when we overextend our roles and the situations that we face, but we got to talk more about that.
Speaker 2:That's a lot of our realities, and the people I know go through the same thing. So as I grew as an older brother, it was first like father figure, just naturally right Looking out. You know you eat lies, you know brothers and sisters, they go before you and then it became support. My mom right, that was just the cause. I've been dealt and so as far as how it was to this day, it's like it's a challenge, but it's also rewarding and purpose-driven and it's one that reminds me like I got to stay grounded, you know.
Speaker 1:It's beautiful. You could see the positive because I didn't feel like your story was like the rigorous. Oh, I had a single mother. I didn't grow up without my father. You don't know what it's like. I like the positivity you have when you say your story and not so much power is the power of the mindset that you talk about a lot and I talk about a lot is just rewriting the story in a way that fits a narrative that is just conducive to like growth you know, that makes you feel good when you speak about your story, that's good.
Speaker 2:I love that Absolutely. Yeah, that's so important. You know, power perspective that's what we do. You know, and that's what my work is built on. You know rose from the concrete. You know that's a lot of our stories. We came from the mud and in order to view the mud as valuable, you got to really work on yourself.
Speaker 3:You know what I'm saying. Work on your perspective, yeah that's important.
Speaker 2:So a lot of us coming from inner city, you know I keep a trail with those I work with, you know, and that's important going from where I came from inner city to go upstate for college and then I kind of resided there. Capital region first time, pwi.
Speaker 4:And then not also not having a victim mindset too?
Speaker 2:Oh, I love that, I love that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's it have you ever adopted that Like growing up, like damn why always my friends get to go, oh, I got to go home, man have you ever felt like that.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, definitely.
Speaker 1:How did you overcome that?
Speaker 2:Definitely. So I could think of a few different times. Let me see, yeah, even just coming from Brooklyn, or you know poverty, you know the projects. To be specific, the piece.
Speaker 1:Then he came out like this Crazy, Shout out to you Appreciate you yo, for real, for real.
Speaker 2:Straight out Tomcans Project. Shout out Wow Tomcans, yeah, for sure, tomcans. Nah, you really rose though. Yo really rose though.
Speaker 4:You know, you know over there. Yeah, if you know, you know, Okay for sure, for sure, you know.
Speaker 2:For those who don't know, you know Marci's with Jay-Z from you know, right over there, those sides you know. But, man, you know, I say it's kind of not all the time where you're from. It's kind of like what you do, where you going, you know what you do with it. So we could talk about neighborhoods and stuff, but it's really what you do, you know. And so as far as victim mindset though that became part of that mindset. You know I'm from here, so nobody never give us none, you know, chip on the shoulder, regular thing as a young, as a young male, young black male, growing up but then also growing up with no father. For me that was like at a time I shout out my mom man, shout out my mom man. Yo, I love you, mom. I'm gonna show her this shout out mom.
Speaker 2:Everybody know me, know how much my mom means to me. But you know she never let me kind of stay too down on that front. But over time, in my own shadow, in my own moments, you know you start to feel like man.
Speaker 4:yeah, it's hard not to dissociate from who your paternal parents are, too 100%.
Speaker 2:I got a mom, and mom is super mom.
Speaker 2:And she's like mom and dad. But then as I grow up I'm like something wrong with that. You know, like one person ain't make me, like one person ain't lay down like let's be honest, my mom real too, so that really took time to kind of work at and say, okay, I'm not gonna look at my disadvantage, you know, as a disadvantage. I wanna turn this to an advantage, right, I wanna turn my adversity into advantage. I wanna turn my obstacles into opportunity. You know what I'm saying and that for me was big.
Speaker 2:Being a 17 year old, young black man feeling like the walls of Brooklyn was caving in on me, like it was no way out.
Speaker 2:Like when you look around you don't see too much making it off of if it's not like sports or music, art and when I say making it I just mean making it out the hood I'm not even talking about like nothing big or extravagant, like people don't get opportunities.
Speaker 2:From my view, when I was growing up Not for nothing, you know so my mom was very intentional about I want you all to know you don't have to be athletes or musicians to you know, get to the next level or whatever that made me for you Not to say you cannot, but she always wanted to give us opportunities and have that. So that helped me. The wider perspective, exactly exactly. And I feel like I took that and kind of ran with it and made it my own to the point of today where I knew I got an opportunity to go up to college and I just took that as a ticket. You know, I took that as like I'm gonna make sure I maximize my time, you know what I mean. Like you got to really lead your life and not just live it.
Speaker 4:I like that. You said that because I seen this video before where black men were talking about why they went to college and a lot of black men well, some of them, they felt like they had to, because that was their only way out. Like, how do you speak about being from the hood and everything? Like some men, they feel like colleges their way to freedom, without having to play that husband role, without having to be in that environment where you're surviving, you don't have to survive. But then it's like you're also in a space now where you are in college. You're not surviving, but you're only here because you're trying to live, you're trying to make it. It's like a safe space, yeah, basically 100%.
Speaker 4:But it's like okay, is it a safe space where you're actually bettering yourself, or you're just protecting yourself?
Speaker 2:from what you're running from.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly Because a lot of people want to go to college. They can't like. They use that freedom as an excuse to like get back at the time they lost. You know what I mean, right? In the same like okay, I didn't get to do this when I was under my parents' household.
Speaker 1:Now I'm going to go through it and it kind of spiraled and then, next thing you know, you're 23 with the alcohol it comes from a lack of loss, like if you feel like you're losing in life, like if you feel like you missed out.
Speaker 4:That comes from a lack of loss, because you're only going to miss out if you feel like you never had. So if you keep feeling like you're missing out on these opportunities and things because within yourself you're not content, you're going to keep looking for things to help bury that feeling.
Speaker 2:Or you know like yeah, feel the void, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's real, agreed, agreed, agreed. You know, running from yourself is a huge thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And I'm a lead out there. So see where we go next, because I can talk on that one all day, but you know running from yourself, you know. You know really ends up hurting you more than helping you in the long run.
Speaker 4:But I also feel like sometimes it's hard to look at yourself in the mirror and take accountability and awareness of your trauma, your toxic habits, your negative thinking, the things that you really need to work on, but then again, it's hard not to.
Speaker 1:At the same time, it's like you've got to pick a hard Right, that's true. One has rewards attached with it. The other one doesn't, you know.
Speaker 4:And sometimes, when you lack the tools and the resources of how OK, how do I take this step? It's hard for you to OK, I got to be a college student, I got to be a brother, I got to be a friend, I got to be a worker, I got to go to school and then all of that. And then, at the same time, I got to remember. Wait, I got to also remember me. I got to feel myself, I got to feel my troubles. I also got to be aware. So it's like I feel like a lot of the times we carry so much baggage that we forget our purpose and who we are, and just remembering like to love ourselves and be there for ourselves 100%, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:And also, if I don't see that's so good. Also, if I don't see reward in facing myself, that too. You know what I'm saying. Like, I don't view looking in the mirror as rewarding. What if I'm at that stage? Right, because we talk about as rewards on that side? We seem to know that, you know, but I don't want to acknowledge that that comes with work. You know what I'm saying. You would have had to understand what looking in the mirror takes. Yeah, Some people still in the bedroom, some people not even in the house.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Let alone going to a mirror, you know, and then just to look at it. Also, this way is like, if you've been conditioned, yes, you get what.
Speaker 4:I'm saying A lot of navelers, yeah, that. Don't even see that I hate myself. What?
Speaker 2:Like, yeah, all I do is distract myself. Actually, distractions feel good. Yeah, you know what I'm saying Like, like, so how?
Speaker 1:did you like even gain that mental clarity? Because I'm not from the projects but from the outside. Looking in it just looks like a mental warfare. Oh man, like you got people pulling you in this direction. Oh bro, come do this, come do that. You not going out this weekend? You wag Like reading a book, like it's a lot of like you know group think yes In that environment. So how did you maintain that mental clarity?
Speaker 2:Mm, 100%. That's a great one, even just leaving today, like I'm visiting moms right now, so like I'm in it, and so to that point it helps me stay grounded, like be visiting you know roots, because that's where I was raised, but it's always to your point, that thing right, like you go back and it's like I'm seeing guys from when I was younger still in front they're taking the same thing they're in front of the store Yo, what's good, young, and what's good Sure, you good how you live, and they look at you.
Speaker 2:So now that's a whole another concept when you go away and you come back specifically for college or something that better yourself, whatever that is.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you're glowing now.
Speaker 3:Yeah even if you just working Like you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2:That. Just look, you know, attract, got a little bit of money. Yeah, you know what I'm saying, like how long you here For all these questions, and it's just like damn. So as far as the clarity, though, says, for me, I got to be honest, or glory to God communicating with somewhere's the question of tudor through time and time and manage your skills and effort, but still look to get there Just doing what I good, what I do and production and producing my new product.
Speaker 2:I'm working deep, trying to work productively for style in terms of writing characters in a more neighborhoods form your first work. I mean, you know, we're all homeless.
Speaker 2:People are running into whatever you propose that people might be aware of orמןv still looks you still in those eyes and care of either set that up or negative. Just what you a source that I had to. That's not my doing. You know what I'm saying, so I would have to shout that out. And then, of course, shout out my mom, who introduced me to that, brought me in this world, do that.
Speaker 2:And so for those who don't know, you know my story is, you know, four months pregnant, my mom was told that you know the baby had no heartbeat right, that at four months pregnant, awaiting her third child, you know she had two options to either seek herbal help, which is holistic support outside of medical right, or have a still birth, which is to give birth to a lifeless baby. And every time I tell my stories weird, because I was there right, but I wasn't there, like with my brain now. But I understand the power of it and I feel it in my spine when I say it. But that was my mom's experience. This was her introduction to Most High.
Speaker 2:She was a young immigrant coming from Trinidad right who was on quest to find her own family, growing up with no parents. So when we think about what has had to come down to your point of clarity, like when my mom shared that story with me at 14, there was a clarity to it Like I'm trying to tell you you got purpose. Like I'm trying to tell you not here for an accident. Like I know you going to waiver and it's all kinds of distractions as a young man. Mom knew that, coming from Trinidad. So like it took me a while to really internalize that I always heard it. So it's kind of like this real coming story. But once I put it on and I wore it and I said, okay, I'm going to wear it, Then the next level was okay, I'm going to share it.
Speaker 2:That only happened this year. Sharing it the first time. Sharing it this year, crazy publicly.
Speaker 1:When I first heard you say that story, it was so powerful. You also have this mantra that you use If you have breath, you have purpose, and I hear you saying that a lot in your videos and you even have it, like you know, on your website at the top and I'm like, even that story and that mantra attached with it is just so powerful. I started like getting into affirmations a lot recently and I found so much power in like creating your own affirmation that means something to you, instead of, like you know, reading something from a book repeating like an author's affirmation Right, so you write your own.
Speaker 1:Yeah so that's such a powerful thing. What does that mean to you? If you have breath, you have purpose. I know that story attached with it. It gives context. But what does that mean to you? Like, break that down 100%.
Speaker 2:I appreciate that your support is real. You're a real one.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm saying that to my research 100%, definitely.
Speaker 2:I do my research, definitely, man still coming up the story, you know, means a lot to me. The mantra you're asking about, yeah, so branding is huge right now. Brand you always wanna find a different way to kind of package that's the name of the game right now right, like how you packaging yourself. What does Mandover matter? Gonna really be right. We understand podcasts, we understand. But what other ways can you tell me without boring me, without telling me the old and the old right Cause, which is crazy, cause there's so much that goes into this episode right here in your brand, but people gonna sit here and be like, so tell me about your mission for you and you're supposed to sum up all of it.
Speaker 4:You know what I'm saying, isn't that?
Speaker 2:crazy and a little bite size, yeah, elevator pitch.
Speaker 2:So this is you know what I'm saying. So just to give that little tip bit, that was kind of my mindset on it. How can I sum up a lot of the things that mean a lot to me and the work that I do? You can never sum that up, but at least what's something I can leave you with, that a resident right. More specifically, when we look at the term itself right, so as long as you have breath, you have purpose. Let's break that down real quick, real simple. Two sections, right. First one as long as you have breath.
Speaker 2:For me, what you wanna do is just look at the fact that you have life. Man, I could just spend that so many ways. But there's a scripture I'll quote real quick, jeremiah 29, 11,. Right, for I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper, you right. Plans to give you hope. Right, and I know I didn't say it specifically right, but there's a plan for you. Is the point I wanna job home. Right, with regards to what you believe in. Right Again, we talk about that deeper source For me. That is a scripture I'm familiar with when we think about you. Have a plan, there's a reason for you here.
Speaker 2:There's another scripture that says you were fearfully and wonderfully made right, giving thanks for knitting you together in your womb. You know what I'm saying. With regards to whatever you believe that scientific, there's all kinds of ways to look at it. All I know is it's not no accident. We here yeah, even if you look at it biologically right we understand when sperm is ejaculated. We understand how many sperm gets out. We understand that it's over 100,000. Only one impacts that egg, only one. We all with that one. I made it. I made it. You know what I'm saying. We gotta have that attitude every morning. Now, of course it's hard, it's not easy. Did I say that this morning? Probably not, but I definitely understand that. That's in my spirit and that's in my heart. As long as you have breath, you have purpose.
Speaker 2:The scripture I was gonna say was first Thessalonians 5. Rejoice in all things, right. All things. There's a season for everything. Rejoice in all things. That's in the scripture Telling you rejoice in all things, there's a gift. Thanks for every time. I thought that was crazy. I was profound hurt that today in the bathroom I said I gotta share that today, right? Why is that important? We go through so many different seasons in our life, so many different ups and downs, that's one on one. No matter who you are, scripture telling you to rejoice. You know how hard it is to give thanks and be grateful and hopeful, no matter what situation you're going through.
Speaker 1:Yup, I wanna say one more thing before we go to that point. Take pressure, yeah. There was something I was reading. It was like if you had all the things you prayed for yesterday, yeah, and you look at the things you had today, so how many things would you have in your present moment? That's good. You know what I mean A lot of people they don't say thank you.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:They only go to God when they need something I need this I need that, I need this, I need that. They don't really say thank you, appreciate life.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Appreciate the breath. Yes, yes, yes so it's important to have that mindset of abundance, Because when you are, we speak. We spoke about this when you are asking God for these things, you're coming from a place of lack, so you're actually multiplying the lack of, but when you say thank you for this, thank you for that, you're actually multiplying your abundance. Yes, and that's something I learned that was very powerful and really changed my life.
Speaker 2:I love that, that's good. You just put me on too, that's good, that's good. And really reaffirming me too, I would say that what you shared, it's a question to your gratitude, right, and your attitude. But yeah, no, I agree to kind of couple those two. I think I agree with that Sharing that gratitude. I think energy is contagious, and so you kind of just try to live to your best ability. Nobody perfect, I know I don't know it all. I know I don't have it all put together For sure, not at any given time or moment. But I'm just somebody who's committed to getting better, committed to growing, and even from young, I never like to get in trouble twice. So mom, mom, tell me something Like okay, lead a chicken in the sink, or you know what I'm saying. Take the food out or do your job, whatever you get in trouble, you get it whooping, whatever it was. I'm like I'm not making that happen again. Some people got to get it.
Speaker 2:Look you can get burned to learn a little bit. You might got to burn me. You know what I'm saying? That's not me. So as I get older, I'm like, okay, I want to kind of apply that perspective to life, and so I'm trying to tighten up Marja, forever striving for perfection, striving to be Christ-like, but understanding that we all, you're perfectly imperfect. Yeah, we all, you know. The biggest realization I had was when I traveled and I realized we more liked than different. Yeah, no matter where I went, whether it's, you know, service in Africa anyway, you don't have to even just go to the other side of Brooklyn. You know what I'm saying and really apply yourself, though you'll see like damn. And so that leads me to think you know why are we arguing over differences? You know what?
Speaker 4:I'm saying Easiest I've done and back to like. So how do you maneuver without feeling like you have to save the world?
Speaker 2:Okay, yes, yes, that hero complex, yes, so that, let me take a moment, that's good.
Speaker 1:Captain Saban.
Speaker 4:Because even me. But like within my journey, it's like because I have awareness or the things that I understand within my spirituality, or my spiritual gifts. I feel like it's my duty and purpose to share it with the world. But sometimes, when you do that and you take on so much of the world now you heavy and you're carrying things that you really didn't have to carry 100% I got you.
Speaker 2:So one of the main things that, and that's so good, because I'll tell you why. One of the main things I live by is like serving leadership, and that's one of the components within my work. So I have three effective communication right how you communicate not only what you say, but what you don't say right Self-advocacy, how well you advocate for yourself what you want, your needs, others.
Speaker 2:You got a lot of quiet people today's time neutral. We're challenging one to advocate I don't need for yourself, but for your fan, for somebody else. Right, and then serving leadership, leading your life where I accept service. Each one, teach one, what goes around comes around right, and so when I live with service, it sounds good, right, like that sounded nice. Oh, help others. You know what I'm saying. Cool, I got that, no problem, I'll do it.
Speaker 2:But what it turns out being is sometimes that selfless kind of act, right, that can get very tiresome, draining. You know what I'm saying, like, hold on a minute, what I'm giving others, and so that's been a huge part of my journey this year specifically. Even working in higher ed two years A lot of my life has been about service. I told you about giving back to my younger siblings, you know, and no one ever really talked about the restoration. Yes, and separating yourself. You got to heal yourself. You cannot pull from an empty car. That saying is so true. And so you know that is how I'm viewing life now. And to get also another tip on, it is like just understanding lessons more, and you can't save everyone and you can't save nobody if you don't help yourself. You know how they say it on the airplane. You know Oxygen mask on first. There's no way I'm about to help you. We running down. Hold on to me, destiny. Let me get you in there.
Speaker 1:Even if it's your child you have to put the oxygen mask on and that's when it gets tricky.
Speaker 2:Close friends and family I tell you that all the time and that's when it gets in a lot of times. That's our challenge and I've been really attacking that healthily to the best of my ability most recently. Yeah, because that's where it lives a lot your family and friends going to have you kind of overextending.
Speaker 4:Yeah, and sometimes they will make you because they're so used to a version of you that they are so used to experiencing. Now, when you're trying to heal and be a different version. It's like you versus you a lot and especially when you communicate they bring a lot of old you that you're trying to grow out from. So it's like trying to show people like, hey, this is not me, no more.
Speaker 2:I'm growing. Oh man, definitely.
Speaker 1:That's why it's so good to step out your environment as well, and I'm happy you even got to experience college in the way you did because, like I said, the project is no joke.
Speaker 3:I wasn't even born there, but I just know it's no joke.
Speaker 1:It's so enticing sometimes the materialism that a lot of these kids are in like $1,000 outfits. But they got ED cards.
Speaker 2:Going back to the apartment complex.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it's like the materialistic world can be so enticing Looks good, you can see the guys and they big cars. They got they money out playing dice. How did you not fall for that? How did you not fall into that glamorization, especially as a man?
Speaker 4:That's even harder.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely Like yo you trying to hit this.
Speaker 4:You know I'm trying to hit this. Are you lame? If you don't do certain things, you're not old. That's deep.
Speaker 2:That's deep and that gets into the question of manhood and masculinity too, I think I know I'm sure we're going to have some questions on that, but before diving deeper into that again not to be cliche, but just credit it in most high. But really, if I want to get specific, there is mom. Mom really did her thing, and not only with me, with all my other six, seven siblings. Everybody take it how they take it. That's just how it resonated with me, her teachings Growing up. From young it was, I had two kicks. Two kicks, you know what I'm saying. One for school, what were they? One for going out First, one was LeatherCon versus the most crazy.
Speaker 4:That's crazy. To me it's not To me it's not.
Speaker 3:They go on. Last one To me.
Speaker 2:it's not To me it's fake flour, I would get flying those right by now. Those are called Right now 2013 in high school in Brooklyn, new York. Nah, they was flaming me Low key. Not that they was bad, but I think OK here we go.
Speaker 3:It could have been worse. Here we go. The energy you keep around. It could have been worse. Energy you keep around here we go.
Speaker 1:That's true too, so if you're going to, keep people around.
Speaker 2:As we're in Materialistic, you're going to have to keep up.
Speaker 3:I learned this after a while, so boom.
Speaker 2:Talk to mama again, coming from Chenney. They close and all that's not a focus over there. It's like she grew up countryside too. So, barefoot slippers. That's not really what they focus on. It's like food, shelter, my mama's tying up pigs, goats. She was learning real skills. Coming to New York boom, you get a blast. All of this materialism we talk about, consumerism, capitalism, all that Boom. Ok, here comes me First boy. Hey, ma'am, I need Jordan. Da, da, da, da da. I'm not buying, no yeah, 200.
Speaker 3:How much is that? 200 dollars? Oh yeah.
Speaker 4:And bills is bill when?
Speaker 2:you make your own money. That's what I was told. So, fast forward, I start losing myself Proud, I'm coming around, I'm like yo, I need bells, I need da, da, da, da. And same thing was told. So I said, ok, let me start making my own money. Once I start making my own money, I'm like, yeah, I see exactly why. Right, it was told. And so, yeah, I just kind of always grew humble. I believe you're blessed if you're humble. Right, you want to take little and live long. My mom always said you know what I'm saying? There's a waste culture going on. There's like a me, me, me, greedy, and all for what? Again, we talk about running from self A lot of it. When you break it down, dudes who was flaming me was really hollow, and so on. I'm saying if you got a joke every day, you know who's wearing what, you could count on. You Like, how are you telling me more so about what I Exactly that now translates? You see it now, to this day, you got people more on celebs and all kind of different.
Speaker 4:Yeah, invested, oh my God, Even on their own. Yeah, invested.
Speaker 2:So for me, it was really just sticking to those principles and keeping my eyes on the prize Right, you know.
Speaker 1:OK.
Speaker 2:Yeah, focusing on what matters. You know we came in with none of these things. So if we talk about the scripture, you know the scripture talk about all this stuff is and I ain't going, I've been quoting because I've been trying to get more in my word. I'd be fully transparent, just for those who watch me. Damn, he got it to get there. He got like I want to be honest, like it's a grind. Any journey you know, with, with, with, with the source, with bettering, it's a journey. Yeah, so I've been trying to get more in my word. That's why it may sound super fresh to you. You know what I'm saying. I know how people be watching. Like I want to be clear about like it's not all perfect. You know what I'm saying. That's a huge part of my brand, as I re came back on media to show.
Speaker 1:But I want to talk about that. Yeah, for sure, did go on the hiatus, yeah yeah, yeah, you know and I was like, damn, I need some positive positivity on my timeline. Where's John? And I'm like John hasn't posted like three months. So yeah, yeah. Why did you take that break from social media and what did it do for you?
Speaker 2:Definitely, man. That break was crazy. So, building off that last point, what I was saying was scripture talks about all these things as vanity, vexation, vexation of spirit, vanity, you know, about vanity and vein, I'm saying in vain means nothing, cause, close all these fancy things. You know what I'm saying. Like outside of your normal needs. You know the scripture suggestion this is vanity. Telling you actually, not suggestions, telling you vanity, you know. So when I think of that, I'm like OK, let me really break down what really matters to me.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Keep the main thing, the main thing. You know what I'm saying, like what's really important.
Speaker 4:And I think that's important. We have an understanding of what matters to you. Yes, that's a whole like. Not what you were told you know what I'm saying, what?
Speaker 2:really matters to you 100%, and that's that's going to require you to look within. That's been the journey. So to the social media, that it says I know I missed you too. Shout out to you for that. You know what I'm saying. I miss my viewers and my audience. You know I hate that that people were hitting me, but for me it was a health thing and the same lines what we're talking about, focusing on ourselves. I had to realize I'm like I got to practice what I preach. You know what I'm saying. Like I'm out here helping people and talking to students Be the best you. You know what I'm saying. Show up as you, you know, be confident, whatever the case is. And I'm like am I really doing that? You know what I'm saying and so, boom, let me break it down. I'm posting media, right what they're referring to. I was on media morning, motivational, if you don't know my page, right?
Speaker 1:You're just posting so much Going hard right, like every time I look I see you I'm like nah, I was all every morning.
Speaker 2:I was committed, you know, and I would do it before work, for those of my people that's working. I had a nine to five and I would get in. I set a time boom, eight, 30, nine, 30, I'm gonna get in before they wake up. I got my schedule. I'm like, okay, I want to do this message today. Okay, I'm feeling this energy. I posted captions, all that. What makes you on my wifi.
Speaker 2:I just really locked in and I was getting great response. My audience responded to me receiving me. Well, great stuff. But in my heart, here come the message. In my heart, I knew I wasn't really in tune. Feel me. What does that mean? I knew I had kind of more to give and I knew I wasn't in alignment with the receipt I was getting. So people looking at me like it's great, which is why I just cleared that up for this episode. You still feeling that that's on you, right, but you have to if you don't hear nothing else from this episode. Right, Cause we all about purpose built. Of course, we chopping it up, but this should be something you gaining out of this, just like we all here. We cooking You're not in the room, but we cooking right, I'm feeling it right. Hope you feel it too, what we're saying. If you don't hear nothing else, you have to look within and figure out what you need. Simple, right, and it's gonna take some time, it's okay. But, like Destiny says, not what people saying, it's not what somebody influenced you.
Speaker 4:That's so important today with so much influences, so much influence, especially with social media. Yeah, that.
Speaker 2:Looking within, though, helped me to see. Okay, I think. Pulling the plug, detaching. I felt pressured by the media. I felt like I had to, like people expecting me to come on the morning, like I got a duty and it was great, but it was toxic. You know what I'm saying? I started mentioning it with my calling. I'm like, damn, it's my calling to be on the media, ain't no calling to be on the media, it's your calling to share the word. Inspire, be your best self.
Speaker 1:That's how calling to lead our life. I wanna do an exercise with you guys. We're gonna do so. Basically, back to your why. What's your reason, what's your purpose? And a lot of people confuse their why with surface level purposes, where it's like, like you said, my calling is social media, you know what I mean. So, with this exercise, be a rapper.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm gonna ask you why, right After everything, I asked you all right. So I'm gonna say what is your purpose Like, what is your overall vision for yourself? And you're gonna say it, and I'm gonna say why. And you're gonna say it, and I'm gonna say it five, why? Five times, until you get to the fifth one, and they say that's like your core. Why that's deep, five levels deep, no less or no more. Okay, that's true, that's true. So, john Johnson, yes, yo, what do you think your purpose is in this world? What do you wanna leave your legacy to be?
Speaker 2:Leave people better. Leave people better.
Speaker 1:Why do you wanna leave people feeling better?
Speaker 2:Damn. Can I change my phrase?
Speaker 1:You gotta keep going with it. You gotta keep going with it, build it.
Speaker 2:Build it. I bet. Why do I wanna leave people feeling better? Because it's necessary to become more conscious.
Speaker 1:Why do you think it's necessary to become more conscious, or why do you want people to become more conscious?
Speaker 2:Without that, there'll be loss.
Speaker 1:Why do you think, why do you feel like there'll be loss?
Speaker 2:I like this. This is good, right. Why do I feel like there'll be loss? Because I've seen it before.
Speaker 1:For this is the fourth. Why?
Speaker 2:Fifth is last right, mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:Okay, why do you feel like you've seen it before?
Speaker 2:My life experience and the cause I've been dealt.
Speaker 1:Fifth, why? Why do you think your life and this experience and cards you have been dealt makes you want to do that?
Speaker 2:Right, um, yeah, circling back to that first one, but I would say, because you know, most hard new, I would do something with it and make the best of it. You know, and, and, and, yeah, it's my calling, it's our calling, you know, it's a duty, you know.
Speaker 1:It's your duty.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to keep it short, but I think, I think.
Speaker 1:I I feel like you wanted to say way more.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think did, I think did, but I didn't know.
Speaker 1:I feel like you wanted to say more. That's how that was. Cool Destiny, we gon' go to you, I feel like Y'all love on Zump, right now. Ooh nah, hit me with it, hit me with it.
Speaker 2:Yo.
Speaker 1:So, like the initial question is why?
Speaker 4:what is your purpose? I feel like my purpose in life is to love unconditionally and to spread love, to give love and to be a reflection of love. Why do you want to be a reflection of love? Because it's important that we lead with love, we show love because in the end, like all of this is gonna end at one point, but at least the only thing that people take, no matter what, is your energy, They'll always remember how you make them feel. Maybe sometimes they remember the words, but it's that feeling. So I want to be remembered for being a source and a reflection of love.
Speaker 1:Why do you want to be remembered for being a source and a reflection of love?
Speaker 4:Because I feel like in this world that we live in, people forget that that's the most important thing. Like we literally are born out of love. The first thing that we literally learn is love. You learn it from your mother. She's protecting you in her room for nine months, those first stages of a baby, you're literally nurtured with nothing but love. That's how you literally grow and then, throughout those stages, you keep growing from that nurturing that love, those affirmations I love you. How are you doing today? I hope you have a great day. Those are the things that enable our growth from being a kid to being older. So I feel like it's important for us to remember that source, like the source of love, and not to forget it. And why do?
Speaker 1:you think it's important that people remember their source of love?
Speaker 4:Because we live in a world where temptation, greed, envy, negativity, a lot of bad things surround us and they're so enabled and it's in our norm that we digest so much things that really we shouldn't even be digesting it. We really shouldn't be accepting these behaviors, but because of the society and the world that we live in today that a lot of these negative things are accepted and socially accepted, that we first need to be able to we forget how to be people, we forget how to be human.
Speaker 4:We forget how to love, we forget how to be vulnerable. We forget how to have emotions. We forget how to communicate. We forget the basic things. That is our purpose in life is to be human, Like literally. If we take out all these emotions and we forget all that stuff that make us human, will be robots, and that's not the purpose of life. The whole purpose is to enjoy heartbreaks, enjoy falling in love, enjoy the lessons that come with life, because life is short and you only get one chance at it. But at least you know that when you did everything, when you did have a heartbreak, when you did have those friendships, you did it the best that you could and you did it with love. You led with intention of love and with genuine intentions and with just being genuine, being a human.
Speaker 1:Damn. We're on the third one.
Speaker 2:Wow, how about this day you got two more dustings.
Speaker 1:Why do you think negativity is commonplace for people?
Speaker 4:I feel like it's so easy to dwell, especially for me. Sometimes, negativity is not just about watching something on TV, and they fight in all the time. It's about your thoughts. It's about how you reflect on yourself. It's about how you perceive people, how you perceive others.
Speaker 4:When you have a bad day, the first thing that you do are you gonna dwell on that and say you know what I hate life? Eff everybody. This is my fault, and you put yourself in a dark space instead of learning how to. You know what. I did have a bad day, but I can make the most out of it. I could love myself enough to forgive what happened and still show myself the kindness that I deserve and still allow myself to feel the love that I know that I deserve. Regardless of what happens or what might occur, I still am leading with love and I'm showing that to myself. This way, I can reflect that. So when people conversate with me, I'm not having a bad day. You wouldn't even be able to tell that I had a bad day, because I'm forgiving myself and I'm loving myself with the nurturing that I need. Right, right, last, why?
Speaker 1:Mm, why do you think it's important not to dwell?
Speaker 4:I think it's important not to dwell because it's easy to. It's easy to do bad than it is to do good. It's easy to stay in a negative space than it is to be in a loving space. So to be able to challenge yourself, to do things opposite of the norm, do things opposite of what you see today, like, when you click on your channel and you open up the TV, it's easy to see people fighting and arguing. Then you see people in love and showing a loving family, showing loving friendship, showing healthy communication.
Speaker 4:That doesn't require me to curse somebody out their name to get my point across. So I feel like it's important to have healthy patterns and have healthy communication. Like not everything has to be negative, not because something negative happens. You have to dwell on that and you have to stay in that place. Like no, like you need light. It's balance, and dark it's like, yeah, you need the bad to understand, to appreciate the light. So, with that balance, I feel like it's important because it allows you to see the importance, the importance of life and just how to accept things, without staying stagnant, because as humans, we allow our emotions to rule us, but that's being human. So I feel like, once you have an understanding of that balance and how to love in a healthy way and how to be mad in a healthy way, it allows you to be a better person and be a better friend and just be a better person in the world to others and back again, reflecting that love.
Speaker 1:I love this exercise because it really like, yeah, that was very powerful, that's right, that's right, that's right, that's right, that's right.
Speaker 2:Couch on fire right now, let's just get a little silence for that, a moment for a silence for that. For sure, for sure.
Speaker 1:I love this exercise because I feel like especially like you know, we're all in our 20s I feel like it's very incentivized, especially on social media, for us to keep posting, to keep moving fast, to get our business out there, to get ourselves out there, to get us like keep branding ourselves, to keep moving, right, yeah, and this exercise is so powerful because it actually makes you stop and like type in the GPS in the car and actually see where you're going. You're moving, but you don't know where you're going. Right, you know it's a lot of just people doing this, trying to be productive and feel productive, but it's like where are you going with it?
Speaker 4:I feel like people don't move with intention, they just move.
Speaker 2:Exactly, yeah, yeah, that's important. That's important. They say they say speed, speed with no direction, it's useless. You know what I'm saying?
Speaker 4:Exactly you could work harder but like yeah, and it's like now, especially today, it's like everybody's rushing to live like Jay-Z and Beyonce, but you have to start from somewhere. Beyonce started off in a group. She needed that community in order to be Beyonce, now known as a household name. So it's like I feel like people forget, like, along the journey, you have to start the engine, you have to make sure that your car is working, you have to make sure that there's gas in it before you can go anywhere, and I feel like people forget, like you have to start from somewhere in order to get to that place that you're trying to be 100%, you'll be going nowhere really fast.
Speaker 2:And now you don't got no gas.
Speaker 4:Right 100%. You should have checked that, you know like those things that you should have paid attention to, and it was there, but because you were so focused on the destination that you forgot to make sure that you had everything to get to your destination Within the journey, and that's why I think social media can be a very like tricky space to navigate, especially as somebody that isn't just a consumer of it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you're producing a lot. Yeah, it can be very draining at times because you're, I feel like it's human nature to compare. Yeah, I know you follow a bunch of motivational speakers because that's what you're into. I follow a bunch of podcasts and I'm like damn, I could have said this that way.
Speaker 3:I could have done this different.
Speaker 1:I'm just naturally going to compare myself to that. So I think it's important to just go on detox time and time again and reflect on your why.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's important. You know comparison. At the for joy they say you know what I'm saying, so you know that's. That's a big one not to keep dropping little. You know scriptures but they they helped me kind of navigate some of the things. You're told Word, word. You know comparison. I like how you shine light on it, because that's really part of our nature, you know, and that was also part of why I left. But yeah, it helped me to come back when I realized it was all. It was all within me.
Speaker 1:It wasn't external, it was internal.
Speaker 2:But that was messing up my viewpoint. So that's, that's a big one. That's a big one. I mean they creating pages for you. Yeah, based on what you, what you're doing, and using the algorithm.
Speaker 1:So hashtag FYP.
Speaker 2:Word Facts.
Speaker 4:I think we should end it on a positive note, while we.
Speaker 1:I feel like we've been positive. No, like something like to take, like okay, like you know, like it ended, like yeah when I walked through this door, I, like you, want to feel like you could conquer the world.
Speaker 4:Yeah like on a really positive, positive like, okay, yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, I'm going to end with this question. I feel like this is a good one. Okay, how can we shift the narrative collectively? Great, great one, right narrative Okay, which narrative?
Speaker 2:which narrative? Which narrative?
Speaker 1:just like as a collective. You know I'm talking about social media. So bad, and no people in your 20s, gen Z. How can we change that narrative collectively to feel more optimistic about the future of just you know, society?
Speaker 2:One word unity. You know what I'm saying. Unity, building up destiny love. In my work with students, getting into workshops and stuff like that, you see a lot of again a lot of parent questions lately working with the young people. For me, I started off workshops presentations. What it has evolved into is like talking to parents. Suddenly now I'm in the family dynamic Because it's important to know that my kids is going back to and when they're out, the other if we're not careful. So like going back to the family dynamic is has become a thing. So in a nutshell, when I think about it, it's really bridging that gap and parents meeting their children where they're at. Children meeting adults where they're at right. They're not just these wise old cranks that need to get put away.
Speaker 2:You know what I'm saying, like nursing homes and all that culture, I think already, like some places don't even have that nursing homes and stuff like. So we got to think about, like what's the perception of old elderly? Like that's all, that's our stone rock. And then on the flip side last thing I'll say you know, elderly got to respect the youngest, so we can't count them out just because they look different.
Speaker 3:They told you.
Speaker 2:You know we bringing a new wave, and then those younger than us if we lead in them. You already know they're coming up, so I say togetherness.
Speaker 1:Yes, I love that. I want to agree with him. Yeah, spread love, y'all Spread love. This is Brooklyn. Wait, you know it.
Speaker 2:Baby, baby. I, like you, RIP Yo.
Speaker 1:Reach the end of another episode. If you reach the end, shout out to you I appreciate you, like you really love yourself, like you really listen to the end, like, come on, like I know you got some gemstremeness and make sure you tell your friend, a tele-friend, mother to tele-friend, mother, auntie, cousin, sister, dog sit, mailman Got his mind over matter baby.
Speaker 2:All that, let's get it, let's get it. Uh huh, be out here. Peace, that's it, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:Damn, I should have told you to say it so soon, but I'm gonna put it in. Put it in.
Speaker 2:Word. We said a little bit in the beginning that was it, that was it, that was it. We kept that.
Speaker 1:No, we body that.
Speaker 2:That was crazy.