The Rising Beyond Podcast

Ep 32: Surviving the False Narrative of Your Abuser

Season 1 Episode 32

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It is not a question of if your abusive ex will share a false narrative about you but when, to whom, and what will it be about.  After working for over a decade with victims and survivors of domestic violence and narcissistic abuse I have seen false narratives and lies cause so much distress and have legal implications.  So, how can you survive these false narratives?

First, we need to understand that the false narratives do not only come up once you have left your abuser.  You are conditioned from the very beginning of the relationship to be a part of these lies.  Through strategies of gaslighting, DARVO, and the constant mask they wear in public, the false narrative is a constant.

These narratives seem to increase in intensity after a victim leaves and include anything that will help them avoid taking accountability, saving face, and destroying you.  So what are some tips for surviving these types of attacks?

  • Know what to expect, remember it’s not if, but when
  • Learn to predict the possible narratives
  • Increase your inner circle of support
  • Choose your battles of who/what/when you defend yourself to
  • Defend with evidence and little emotion
  • Radical acceptance of what you can and cannot control


Show links:
Couples Therapy is Not the Answer


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