5 teeth ?!! A Tooth fairy kids adventuuuure!
By
© Sarah Golding 2021
============
CAST
Tooth Fairy, Fairy Grumptious - Taylor Garcia Von Biljon
Maybug - Justin Price
Sleeping kid - Kayla Rivera
TFHQ helpdesk - Sarah Golding
============================
SFX NIGHT TIME AMBIENCE - AN OPEN WINDOW - IT'S HOT!
SFX FLYING, BUZZING WINGS. A PILLOW BEING LIFTED. A TUT.
Oh. My goodness. Five? Five at once!?Who loses five at once? Five!!! Teeth!! And they’re big ones. Oh…my goodness! Gadzooks even! No. I can’t do it. I can’t! I’m not built to fly with 5! And I’m all on my own, so lonely. Why can’t we work in pairs? Oh I do wish I had a friend. A friend to help me carry this heavy load. Hmm. Think think think G. Thinkety think. Right. Yes. I need to phone TFHQ don’t I? My TF insurance won’t cover a broken back, or stretched wings, or a tired core, which is I’m sure what I’d get if I tried to lift all of these at once. Oh…they won’t even fit in my fairy pouch and it’s extra large too!
Oh. Oh No! This will not do! What to do what to doooooo?
Oh, oh no, with all my furious wing buzzing the human child is waking up. Uhm. Shhhhhhh little human child….shhhhh. I can never remember if I am to whisper up their nose or in their ears. Oh well. I know to just stay away from the gaping mouth, hmmm? Those yawns are powerful suckers and I know a fairy colleague or two have lost boots or entirely disappeared, feared yawned to the dark death of an oesophagus, the throat or as I see it, the deep dark cavernous tunnel of darkest deepest black. Ok. Come on G, Where’s my pouch! Ah! Here it is. (Clears throat)
Do the magic fairy dust thing in good time,
but do remember well, that it has.. to ..rhyme.
Ok G. You can do this….you mustn’t wake him up…if he sees you, you turn to dried leaf or a white feather forever…depending, of course, how very good you have been. And right now, I’m not quite sure where I stand if I let everyone down and don’t deliver these teeth! Tonight is not a night for disappointing..no.….but the fairy motto is,
whatever is under the pillow must be delivered to fairy climes,
for fear the evil Maybugs hunt you, kill you, steal the teeth and dines.
Be careful lest you call them, for their horns can spill your magic,
and as we know, the loss of any tooth fairy is tragic!
Oh come on, Concentrate. Sprinkle the fairy dust…..come on G! He mustn’t walk up he mustn’t.
SFX MAGIC TUNE
Ok little boy please don’t awake
I am your friendly tooth fairy and your teeth I’m gonna take
Im gonna Sprinkle tinkled fairy dust upon your young visage,
so if you premature awaken then I am but a mirage
Your tooth-fairy I ammmmm
My job has been assigned
But 5 teeth in one journey?
Well I think I just resigned!
Ah. Good. A yawn. And he’s a sleep again. Great. Good. Great. Ok. Let’s call HQ. Where’s my….antennae…(sfx) and….my phone…(sfx) ..aha! …and…the number….(dials) 444, 4444, 44, 44, 44, 4, 444,4. (Long pause) 4.
. SFX She picks up and connects her telephone and dials.
Hello. TFHQ? Yes this is Fairy Grumptious…can you pop me through to complaints please? Thank you. Yes my Fairy docket number is 666 and this is job 999. Yes, it is an emergency. No I cannot hold. Yes I have sprinkled. No I don’t want to tell you the problem. (Listens) What! A 24 hour wait for complaints. Well what can I do? I have 5 teeth here for collection at once. Yes. I know. 5. Two are very pointy…I’m not sure but maybe this kid is a vampire…I dunno. (Listens) No I can’t. No it wouldn’t cover it, Yes it would stretch them…and tire it, I know. But I don’t know what to do. Oh wait.
. SFX A buzzing.
Oh no! As if tonight couldn’t get any worse….a may bug has just flown in! Yes. It’s landed on the bed and it’s red eyes are looking right at me. Ok. Hang on.
Hey Maybug. Please leave.
It’s shaking it’s horn. Hmm. Now it’s looking at me funny. It’s…pointing….It wants one of my gold coins. No. I’m not going to give him one, look.
Shoo! Shoo!
Oh, oh no….he’s walking up the bedsheets. He’s on the boys chest. Oh no. Oh please don’t wake him up Maybug, please. Wait! Stop! Don’t fly on his nose. Or up it. Watch out for the yawn! Oh no!
Hey, TFHQ help desk? Tne boy just yawned and sucked in the maybug. Yeah. It looks gross. The things head is still out tho. What should I do? You sure? Ok.
Ok maybug. TFHQ suggests I help you and pull you out before you’re swallowed….or get injured by those remaining teeth, so, blink those beautiful red eyes if you won’t hunt me eat me or kill me when you’re free? Ok. Maybug blinked. Great. Ok. Here goes
SFX BUZZING AND EFFORT OF PULLING.
I’m pulling, I’m stretching, I’m…putting in effort…I’m….pulling….it’s….its….WOAHHHH!
Maybugs free, yay maybug, and…thank goodness the human child has turned over and is asleep. So. Uh. What happens now.
SFX BZZZ BZZ BZZ BZ BZZZZ BZZZ
I…can’t understand you maybug. Hang on. TFHQ does the fairyterpreter work with Maybugs…? It should do? Groovy.
Let me just place the interpreter halo on your horn sir, so that we may understand each other in full. If you think, I will understand you, and vice versa.
. SFX a brrringggg sound of the interpreter turning on
Huh? Oh. Sure. Maybug says thanks for freeing me. I didn’t fancy a slide down the the deep dark cavernous tunnel of darkest deepest black. Oh! You call it that too huh? How can you repay me!! Well. I might just have an idea….
I tell ya what! If you want to repay me, and earn a gold coin, how do you feel about joining me on this job and carrying some teeth? Huh? You will? Good. You feel you can carry them to tooth fairy fields HQ? It’s about a three hour fly. Oh…you do? Fantastic! Well TFHQ it seems I don’t need complaints after all. Maybe you can send a message to allies that we need a welcome team in three hours for me and my new friend here Maybug. Yes! Yes he’s just now storing two teeth under one wing…and two under the other, and yes maybug can still fly! Genius.
Well yes, MAYBUG, I ..I will lead the way. Let me just put this coin under the pillow and the tooth in this velvet red bag……oh…thank you…I stitched it myself…and……are you ready? Well, let’s awayyyyyy!
SFX THEY FLY OFF, HAPPILY BUZZING
Oh yes how lovely to have a new friend to fly with. This job can be so lonely. I’m so glad you’re not a nasty maybug. I’ve heard such tales about horrible ones who eat tooth fairies…and even eat the human teeth. Scrape scrape scrape. Yes. Yes I know.
(Conversation fades into the distance). Well you’ll just have to come to the fairy ball at the weekend as my guest. They will be impressed that we brought 5 teeth at once back to the fairy fields. These ones are big enough to perhaps be considered as foundations for the new fairy castle they are planning to build. How exciting is that? Oh, well, maybe yes we could keep one and make it into an armchair…with the right cushions of course! You might stay for a few days in fairy fields? You’ve always wanted a fun friend tooo? Well How lovely.