Everything is BS
Navigating Life's Unexpected Events: Freak Accidents, Natural Disasters, and Wedding Etiquette Pt. 1
Ever mowed your lawn and ended up losing a big toe? Me neither, but my brother wasn’t so lucky. Listen up as I share a hilarious and somewhat horrifying tale of this freak lawnmower incident. The story encompasses everything from a calm neighbor to my sister-in-law-to-be identifying the toe, the chaotic surgery, and my brother's recovery process. You’ll also get to know the chucklesome nickname this mishap earned him.
Next, can you imagine a super volcano like Yellowstone erupting? Although it might sound far-fetched, the consequences would be immense. Today, we take you on a journey discussing the impact such an event would have on global temperatures, food chain, and our overall ecosystem. Brace yourselves as we delve into the power of nature and how we often underestimate our lack of control over our planet.
Finally for our main conversation, have you ever pondered over the dos and don'ts when attending a wedding? Hold your thoughts as we dissect wedding etiquette, focusing on guests' behavior. We discuss the delicate intricacies around plus one invitations, dealing with non-married guests, and how to be the perfect guest. We also navigate the challenges faced by wedding photographers in the era of ubiquitous cellphone cameras and the importance of respecting their roles. So, get ready to be entertained, informed, and perhaps a bit shell-shocked in this rollercoaster of an episode.
Ever mowed your lawn and ended up losing a big toe? Me neither, but my brother wasn’t so lucky. Listen up as I share a hilarious and somewhat horrifying tale of this freak lawnmower incident. The story encompasses everything from a calm neighbor to my sister-in-law-to-be identifying the toe, the chaotic surgery, and my brother's recovery process. You’ll also get to know the chucklesome nickname this mishap earned him.
Next, can you imagine a super volcano like Yellowstone erupting? Although it might sound far-fetched, the consequences would be immense. Today, we take you on a journey discussing the impact such an event would have on global temperatures, food chain, and our overall ecosystem. Brace yourselves as we delve into the power of nature and how we often underestimate our lack of control over our planet.
Finally for our main conversation, have you ever pondered over the dos and don'ts when attending a wedding? Hold your thoughts as we dissect wedding etiquette, focusing on guests' behavior. We discuss the delicate intricacies around plus one invitations, dealing with non-married guests, and how to be the perfect guest. We also navigate the challenges faced by wedding photographers in the era of ubiquitous cellphone cameras and the importance of respecting their roles. So, get ready to be entertained, informed, and perhaps a bit shell-shocked in this rollercoaster of an episode.
And we are recording. We are live with our podcast. It is June 27th And I've got a crazy story that you don't know about.
Speaker 1:No, I don't.
Speaker 2:I have specifically not told you because I wanted to share it here. On this, okay, tell me. Okay, let me set the stage because this is a bit wild. So I have a younger brother, six years younger than me, and he was at his house two weeks ago, normal summer day, mowing the lawn, doing his thing, and he was mowing And he was there's a little, there's like a little hill that goes into the driveway, but it's a little steep hill And he was pushing the mower and he another portion of the story he was this was the last piece that he was done after this And he's mowing and he's going down the hill with the mower And this is where the driveway connects. So there's like there's a curb, like a little lifted curb, so he's pushing the mower down And when he pulled the mower back up, his feet slipped under him And his foot No went under the mower.
Speaker 2:He dropped the mower, looked at his foot and saw that his shoe was chopped, except he didn't feel anything yet And he continued to look and he looked down at what looked like his big toe was chopped off. And he looked up and was like no, that's not real.
Speaker 1:The horror.
Speaker 2:So he thought about it for a second, looked back down, saw that his toe was chopped off.
Speaker 1:Off, completely off.
Speaker 2:Half half the big toe was sliced right off, So this happened two weeks ago.
Speaker 1:How did I not know this yet?
Speaker 2:I have not really posted about it, I have not talked about it, So just kind of waiting to make sure that you know he was okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because. So after he ran around the house to his fiance and was like hospital, hospital, need to go to hospital and Did they burn the piece of the toe?
Speaker 2:So this is even, this is the the grosser part of the story. He it didn't even like occur to him, he didn't even think about that. But his neighbor, i guess, saw him, came over, asked what was wrong And Kevin told him, my brother, you know, i mode chopped my toe off And I guess the neighbor was very calm, cool and collected. I was like, okay, do you want me to help you find it? And he didn't even think about it. He was like sure, yeah, i guess. So Meanwhile, meanwhile, his fiance is inside thinking thinking he just like sliced it, like no, has no context, no idea, just like okay, let me get you know, go inside, we're going to get in the car. And then I guess, the neighbor I'm going to care, i'm going to push this part of the story, I'm trying to remember the specific detail, but pretty positive that the neighbor he was like I can't do this to something.
Speaker 2:No, yeah, she's like I can't handle this. Yeah, She, the neighbor pointed down to to his fiance Claire, like something on the ground And she's like what? And she looked down and she this is you don't want to hear that.
Speaker 2:She looked down And she's. What she's looking at is a piece of something that she said look like if you ever close your ears we don't hear. This bit of grape in half and the inside of it. And then she still didn't know what it was, picked it up and was like, oh that's, that's a toe. And then she again had no idea at this point and just immediately like panic would be my guess.
Speaker 1:Yeah, what did she do?
Speaker 2:Ran inside, put it in a cup of ice, even if the funnier details of the story are they ran into the car, they're the couple. Like this is the like, the, the ridiculous semantics, like the extra portions of the story. Both her cup holders were taken, so she just put it in between her lap and she's driving with this. Okay, what's so important in your cup?
Speaker 1:You don't know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2:But maybe in the panic and drive, like you can't dump it, maybe it was full, like for me, i would leave, like you know, a drink in there and it's. There's nowhere else to put it. I'm unwell. So, luckily, the hospital is not far away. It's in. they live, like you know, a few minutes from it, so it's just down the hill. So they hopped down to the hospital and, yeah, they. unfortunately it could not be sewed back on, so the How's your brother's balance since?
Speaker 2:he well, we don't really know yet. Um, he should be okay. They told him that he should be okay because it wasn't. It wasn't the whole toe, it was just. It was like slightly actually above the, the joint. Like, uh, you know, like they said, the joint. Like, uh, you know, like the knuckle joint.
Speaker 1:So where the nail, the nail is gone.
Speaker 2:Yes, It is. they had to do surgery and it is a. it is a closed nub now, So he is missing that portion of his toe.
Speaker 1:My brother has a nub on his on his hand.
Speaker 2:That's I would. How did he have that done?
Speaker 1:He is a contractor and he does, you know all the things and he is uh not very careful. So, you know, i I think it's like. I think it's like his ring finger too, oh, uh, but yeah that's that's horrifying, actually. So you're, he hasn't been walking.
Speaker 2:No, he's in a. He's like in a, a boot that's, and then it's got rapping and then he's got crutches. So I did see him yesterday.
Speaker 2:He's doing okay, he was, he was completely himself, he just you know. But for the it wasn't he was. I mean, it's weird to think about that. It happened and he didn't even know it happened, so like there was no immediate pain, because I think your body just kind of goes into like a shock. And then, even then he said you know, the pain wasn't, it was, you know, sweating a lot, but it wasn't. The pain wasn't too much there yet, and it wasn't until the next day. And then also the when he had surgery, which, by the way, took days. It took a few days before they could get him into surgery, so he was just at home waiting with a open, you know.
Speaker 1:How's this Beyonce?
Speaker 2:She said I'm traumatized. So she told me last night Yeah. Claire, if you hear this dude, sorry, you are a hero. You are a hero.
Speaker 1:Oh, my God Yeah. I don't know, i don't know if I would have like. No, i'm pretty good under pressure, i guess.
Speaker 2:But when you think about it. Yeah, i know, oh my God, still, though crazy, absolutely.
Speaker 1:So what they do for the surgery, they just like stitch it up and it's a closed nub now.
Speaker 2:Yep, They had to shave it down a little bit because they got to take the skin and basically surgically sew it up, make it a piece. But he said after the surgery he was in a lot of pain for a couple days.
Speaker 1:So he said it was just burning. I hate that very much. Thank you for sharing. How can I not share that?
Speaker 2:It's like, yeah, when I got a phone call from my mom who was telling me, like your brother's in the hospital, and it's like, oh my God. So we, yeah, talking on the phone, put his foot under the mower and it's like, oh my, like his whole foot or no, it was just his toe, okay.
Speaker 1:Well, when I was a kid, you know they my grandfather wouldn't even let me ride a bike without shoes on. He's like nope, if you get your foot caught in the spindles or whatever, he was like I could take off a toe. My dad wouldn't let us mow without closed-toed shoes, and that's. But when you're a kid and you're like, oh my, you know, my parents are being too careful, too cautious, like nothing's going to happen, you know, and then you're a full-blown adult mowing your lawn and you lose a toe.
Speaker 2:You lose a toe. That's it, and that's it's uh, he already said, his uh, i don't know if his coworkers or his friends with the calling him his nicknames 9.5.
Speaker 1:Okay, okay, that's a good one I'm going to take that for my brother Dan.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a good one 9.5 is catchy. I was like, yeah, if you played any sports and you actually had like a jersey with a number, that'd be your number, that'd be great, oh my God.
Speaker 1:So what's the recovery on that? What does that look like?
Speaker 2:I think a few weeks honestly. So I mean it, it just has to. It's already, he said, looking more normal than it. You know, normal with it being covered. It's not purple and red and all sorts of things. Yeah, with the skin is already like kind of grown back and um in that enclosed area. But yeah, you got to. He has to change the bandages, i think every two to three days, so in the first comes in visits.
Speaker 1:Perfect. So I thought your, i thought your big toe had a lot to do with your balance. It does, it does.
Speaker 2:So the key point is that he did not lose the entire thing. It's that subtle. So the fact that he still has half of it makes a difference where I think his balance is going to be a little bit off. But they said he should be okay, like you, should be able to to absolutely deal with it. But when it comes to like so he was a skateboarder. He was a skateboarder growing up and he was explaining to me last night He's in, you know that he doesn't skateboard as much anymore, but he still occasionally would. But he's like I don't, i don't know how that's going to work because you, you use your big toe a lot to like, you know, move the board and something near when you're doing things.
Speaker 2:So. But he's a big, he loves to golf too, so he's as long as he can golf. And the nurse was like, yeah, you'll be fine, you can go. And he was like okay, you can golf, yeah.
Speaker 1:Um, I hate to change the subject. Do you see what's going on with my camera right now? Do you see it? It's like half and half. It's like there's a filter on half.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you do have a filter going on. Oh, i wonder if it's your actual. I wonder if it's your actual camera. I'm gonna try to clean it really quick.
Speaker 1:What the heck is that I'm so confused. More confused though. Okay, let's give that a go. Yeah, i think it was just dirty, but that's really weird, because it didn't do that for the first few minutes. Yeah, really. I didn't recognize it yet Um thank you for sharing that with me. I appreciate that story.
Speaker 2:Um, it's, yeah, he's. um, i'm happy he's doing okay And uh thank goodness it was just the little.
Speaker 1:Well, a big toe, but thank goodness it was just a little portion of it.
Speaker 2:I was a portion of it, yeah.
Speaker 1:Whoa, i got nothing for you today. I went to the Cape Um. This is my new mug from Cape Cod, from Nirvana coffee.
Speaker 2:It was really good, never been to the Cape Really, so Chad hadn't been either.
Speaker 1:He hadn't been until last year when we went to go visit my aunt and uncle and I was like there's no way like how, but he also has never gone to Newport or anything either, and I'm like to me. I feel like my parents took advantage of all of the within driving you know range trips that they could to, to probably like to get us out of the house.
Speaker 1:But but no, chad was saying like he's not, he had never been to. Well, i don't think he has been to Newport still We haven't gone together, and last year was his first trip to the Cape. It's it's just so strange that your family would take trips down to Florida and not like up a few hours to the Cape.
Speaker 2:It's, yeah, i don't know. I don't know. I think it's because it's one of those things that and I hear this everywhere where people don't visit the things that are near them or relatively close to them, we take advantage of it. We do. It's a thing, i know it's a thing. It'll always be there, that's that's. That's what you said. It's always. You know we'll do it next year, it's fine. So but it was awesome.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it was good. We I actually had a family session with my cousin and my aunt and my uncle and it was really nice to see them as grandparents. We used to call my my. My grandfather on my dad's side was Papa, and then my dad to my sister's kids was Papa, And now my uncle, Bruce to my cousin's son is Papa and it's just, it's very cute And I I love the title, I love that's wearing it proudly.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's just kind of everybody's Papa and our family.
Speaker 1:So it was really nice to see them like enjoying the grandparent life, because my, my cousin, she's a, she's a photographer. She's kind of like me where she really wanted to like live a lot of life. Well, like you too, she wanted to live life before she gave her life to kids and so they just had their first baby and he's six months old now and he is a little cutie. So I got to take photos of all of them and Chad was right there. I think Chad was bored at certain moments, but it was cute. He was taking photos, or videos of us taking photos, so like we're outside and we're like all bouncing with the baby And he's like it's so funny cause all of you guys are going up down, so we have like those cute videos. And then he grabbed some photos of me and my cousin as well.
Speaker 1:So so it was a good family day, so some really nice needed family time Definitely.
Speaker 2:And were you down by the water? Well, I feel like I saw a photo you posted of you and Chad down by the water.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we. we started at my, my aunt and uncle's house and we had some of our candidates. You know I love like the in-home sessions and just capturing you as you are now. And then we went to a scenic location that was about five minutes away and right after we were done my cousin asked if she could just snag my camera to take a photo of me and Chad. So we don't ever have photos together and that feels really nice to have.
Speaker 2:I go to guess that most photographers feel that way, who are especially the wedding? wedding photographers were just behind it. So much you never have it in front of you.
Speaker 1:It's just yeah, i mean, you don't even think about it, you're just like all right, i'm going to leave my camera at home, but doing it with family was kind of nice cause, and she's a photographer too, so she totally gets it and she understands. So, yeah, the only I. When I came home, i was like, oh man, i didn't get any photos of my aunt and my uncle, but my, this is the aunt that actually married me and Chad. So just a really special weekend and I got to share some of my dad's scans the scans that I did from his box of film, and, um, yeah, just a good family weekend. I kind of needed it Nice.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I think you lucked out weather-wise too. Right, we did Yeah.
Speaker 1:We were supposed to. I didn't even pack a bathing suit because it was supposed to be so rainy. And then on Sunday we woke up and we could have gone to the beach, yeah. And then I was like you know what I have like all these body suits. I'm like we could go to the beach. And Chad was like, yeah, but like you can't go in the water, and you know so, not that I want to go in the water.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Oh no, We know that We have that conversation. That's yeah, that's a whole different story.
Speaker 1:But yeah, no, it was a good weekend So, but I'm happy to be home. I like going to places and then going home in your own bed and like appreciating it more, because you're not that it was uncomfortable there at all. It just you're out of place And then when you get back in your place, you feel like ah.
Speaker 2:And every year that passes and you get older, you appreciate it more and more. You get into your own home and you're like oh, especially for especially for the introverts right. We love our home space, so yeah, i just shared something yesterday It was.
Speaker 1:I think it was like Homer Simpson, like looking out of a window. And I was like hiding in your house after multiple days of social interaction.
Speaker 2:And I'm like that's me Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So I did a poll recently and I asked my clients what their wedding, what rules, what unspoken rules and sometimes they're spoken, but what unspoken rules did your wedding guests break? And so today I would love to talk about wedding guest etiquette, aka guest weddikit Weddikit. I love that Weddikit. So we started. We started one. It was short, it was not very good quality a while ago, and now that we've kind of figured out a little bit more of the quality and we don't have as many mouth sounds, i figured maybe we could like re-record a longer episode with more examples and things that are specifically taken from my clients.
Speaker 2:What's funny is I was going to say I think it was a long ago that we recorded it when there was snow on the ground, and then I was like, oh wait, no, but I don't know what snow on the ground looks like anymore. So because we don't get that here, Yeah.
Speaker 1:I'm really, really hoping. Actually, something Chad just told me something about like a volcano erupting that could cause a global winter. Have you heard anything about that, you know?
Speaker 2:if not as of the most recent, but yeah.
Speaker 1:It's a threat 100% of the time.
Speaker 2:It's always a threat. It's a. You know, yellowstone is a super volcano And if Yellowstone did blow up first of all, a portion of that area would just be like gone And it would be big enough that it would affect cloud cover temperatures across the globe. Absolutely, it would be a. It would definitely be not a good situation for a long time. Can you explain?
Speaker 1:that to me. I just I don't understand. So I totally understand that it would have an impact, but I don't understand the way that you do about the cloud coverage and all of that creating Like what does a literal global winter look like And how does how would that affect?
Speaker 2:how would it do it On an absolute smaller scale? we just dealt with it a few weeks ago. I hearing myself say I gotta stop that. Stop it, chris. Okay.
Speaker 1:I heard myself in the last one go ah, ah, ah, Yeah.
Speaker 2:I don't even know. I'm doing it, there's so. So we just recently, a few weeks ago, had those wildfires in Canada that affected our skies, so everyone's focused on breathing, not being able to see, and just not super blue skies, and that's. You know the sun's out, you can see the sun's out, you can like almost look at it, because it's just this little tiny dot in the sky, but what happened is the actual forecast to temperature from models, from our data would say like 75 and the temperature was actually like 72. Now, normally that's could be relatively normal. It could just be a model being off by two degrees, three degrees, but forecasted highs when it comes to weather models in 2023 on a normal summer day with nothing outrageous to forecast like crazy hurricane, low pressure system, where there's a lot of variables going on, just a normal summer day. We're extremely good at pinpointing what that high temperature is going to be within one to two degrees. We're very good at it now. So the fact that it was days in a row where you have a forecast and then the temperature was like three degrees off, but always cooler, that's the smaller scale showcasing what happens when our sky is obstructed and how that actually affects the ground temperature even in the middle of June. That is the smallest scale.
Speaker 2:A wildfire local to Canada and like the tiniest little blip of earth. A super volcano like Yellowstone exploding would be detriment. It would be an enormous amount of ash and smoke that would go up to the jet stream level up high in the sky And once it's up there it just keeps spinning around and it has to slowly filter out and it can take don't quote me on this as far as you want to know the exact time period, but we are talking months to potentially years. It would, yeah, no, it would affect everything like crops.
Speaker 1:And you said we're always at threat, we're always like in a we're in a constant threat.
Speaker 2:Yeah, i mean earth is a, is a living, breathing thing down to its core, and it's always moving. The plates are always moving because the heat at the center of the earth that we know as much as we know is that it's a solid core with a lot, of, a lot of hot magma yeah, magma, magma, all different levels of the earth and that creates all the all the movement around earth. So at any point, if just the right things happen, you know, yellowstone could blow up And maybe it could be a year, it could be a hundred years, could be a thousand years. We have no idea.
Speaker 1:When it could blow up or how long it would take to get our system back into When it could, when it would blow up.
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Like, but the global winter thing? that would only be for.
Speaker 2:It depends on the severity of the explosion. A.
Speaker 1:Yellowstone. I'm all about a winter, but not if it's going to like you know It wouldn't be.
Speaker 2:it wouldn't be the winter you want.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:No, it would not be good. It would. I mean, we're talking, you're talking about cloud cover all the time, Like it doesn't go away. Yeah, It wouldn't be great, It would not. There would be, there would be huge effects, Huge, Huge things. I mean it affects the food chain. It would affect, you know, sunlight. Sunlight needs to happen. We need to get a certain amount through the. The ecosystem depends on it. So crops would die. You know it would go. We'd go through the whole spiel.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So it's it's always possible. It's not like an ice age.
Speaker 2:It could cause a mini ice age? Absolutely No. I don't know the parts. I don't know if we fully understand why, cause I mean the last you know, quote unquote mini ice age was only a few hundred years ago, so it's not like you know glaciers Very scary.
Speaker 2:It's not like it's not like it's not like you know, glaciers were coming down to Texas, but there was, you know, temperatures were dramatically reduced for the whole year. And it's it. yeah, crazy Earth is interesting. It's we. I love this topic and a, not not like doomsday vibe, but more of a. I think humans, you know in modern society, think we have so much control.
Speaker 1:Yeah, And we don't?
Speaker 2:We don't Like you know we, we, we are on this earth and earth you know we're. We're not running earth, earth runs itself and we just get to live on it.
Speaker 1:And if she wants to show no mercy. we're all gone. We're all gone, That's it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, i mean you could go through everything. you know there could be a giant solar flare or solar storm that could wipe out, you know, all of our satellites and it would totally disrupt because we depend on them now for GPS, for everything.
Speaker 1:Did you see? okay, so maybe I'm. maybe this is like the same thing There was something about in the next 10 years, something with something in space was going to take away our internet, like globally.
Speaker 2:That would probably be it. It would be a if you had a massive solar storm from our sun, which is basically just an explosion of solar energy that sends it just comes spiraling down towards earth And if it hit if it hits correctly and you could wipe out it would it would fry the satellites that we have there, which is, you know, not but just the satellites and not us.
Speaker 1:We wouldn't perish It would just be us living without our internet, which might be kind of a nice refresh, but not for the podcast.
Speaker 2:Not. no, yeah, Number one priority. this podcast would go down, So that's it. That's, that's it. No, it would it. there's a lot more like supply chain would be an issue, because everything runs on internet, so you'd have no food in the grocery stores, like it would be. it would go down the line, it would. it would affect everything, because we'd have no electricity, no way to pump gas. No, you go through all of it.
Speaker 1:So we'd be living in Oregon trail again.
Speaker 2:Yes, Okay, there'd be a very short period of time, and I know if something like that happened, i know they have basic preparations, to my knowledge, but it would take months, to months, to years to to completely re up the electric grid or you know, our satellites, that cause we can't just like we don't just have like a million rockets standing by that we can just like, boom, boom, boom, just start firing back up satellites, get it all working again.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:It would take time.
Speaker 1:Damn.
Speaker 2:Yeah, this. So you just you can't live in fear of that, but it's just, it's just knowing that you know it could happen, Like, and that's what is the what is the fear of leaving your house?
Speaker 1:Cause I'm pretty sure I have a minor case of that.
Speaker 2:I don't know. You get to ask, uh.
Speaker 1:I think I've got a pandemic. It like ruined me.
Speaker 2:It's. I mean, yeah, we spent two years not telling, having people tell us don't go outside and do all these things, so I don't have it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, i don't know. I just feel like I'm not. Uh, i used to be scared of nothing And now I'm like, like Chad always makes fun of me cause he's like bro, you always think that if you go to like a movie, you're going to be like in a shooting or something, but like it's a very real it's, it's real.
Speaker 2:I know And we've kind of talked about this too We're like there, especially when it's when there's been a few and you, you're paying attention to it And you're like, wow, that's that's frightening, that's that could you know. Technically, it's whatever your risk management is, whatever you would like to do and what you're comfortable with, um, even you guys went to the Taylor Swift concert, do you know how many people were just at the mercy of some?
Speaker 2:you know some crazy person who could just show up and do whatever they wanted to do. I again it's like or, but what's the, what's the alternative? Just uh, it's that. It's that balance right.
Speaker 1:Hunker down on your house.
Speaker 2:Hunker down, yeah but at the same time, it's a. You know, if you're the kind of person that wants to go out and see things, then it's a risk. It's always a risk. It just is if you. But if you don't, if you only stay inside your house and don't do anything else, then you're, you're missing out on you know a lot of cool things and great things.
Speaker 2:So, but I understand being careful Like I would like my line of careful is if it's after midnight, I really don't like to be on the road because nothing good happens.
Speaker 1:Nothing good happens after midnight Exactly.
Speaker 2:So, uh, that's you know, that would be my rule of thumb, that's. but that's that's you know cause? it's not, that's not a worthy risk for me. It's like you know, I don't. I'll just either stay where I'm at or it's a very short drive home, um, but I don't like doing that.
Speaker 1:Me either. Sorry, you're not boring me, okay.
Speaker 2:So boring, so boring.
Speaker 1:God, you, with all of your weather talk and knowing things. Hey, you asked.
Speaker 2:I know I did You have to be very careful asking that question.
Speaker 1:No, i mean honestly, like you, i feel like I, i understand, whether I understand, whether patterns like way better now that I'm friends with you, because you, you like, almost do this thing, where, like you say the words, but then, like you, can you like you humanize it for me, like I don't want to say you dumb it down for me, because I need that.
Speaker 2:But, that's like it's you make it a way that I can understand it.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:That's lovely to hear, that's I mean it's because I've been, i mean I've been talking about it, and then I tell people I tell people as if I'm the one who's like really smart, i'm like, yeah, go for it Take the credit. Yeah, like I do tell.
Speaker 1:I tell all of my brides and grooms to follow you, for like wedding up to you and stuff I was going to say.
Speaker 2:your risk, though, is that when they come to you in it with a quick question, like bro, it's going to happen, and you're like, oh hold on, let me put in my magic, yeah. There's a special app.
Speaker 1:I need Um all right, all right, let's dive in to Weddakit.
Speaker 2:Weddakit.
Speaker 1:Um. So, like I said before, um, we basically tried to do this And since we have figured out a little bit more of the technicals of how to make this sound better for your ear holes, we're just going to go through these again. Um, i actually have more this time because I was able to ask my clients what kind of rules they had their wedding guests break. And some of them are pretty rude and some of them are kind of like you know, i could see some some brides and grooms being like I don't really care about that, it's not a really big deal, um, and then some of them are like no, that could hurt a friendship, you know. So we just want to go over some of these with our listeners So that bride's grooms, wedding couples, have an idea of what BS to expect from their wedding guests. And then also, if you are ever a guest at a wedding, um, maybe listen back to this or think back to this so that you are not one of the people who are causing issues.
Speaker 2:So, number one good things to know. Yeah, coming up.
Speaker 1:This is. I think this is the most important, and I'm going to start with this one because I feel like this is. I've seen reels, i've seen posts, i've seen the not wedding wire, all of the biggest wedding magazines talking about this, sending out invites and receiving notes or something back, asking if they have a plus one, when it was not made like abundantly clear which, by the way, if there is nothing about a plus one on your invite, that is abundantly clear. You don't have a plus one.
Speaker 2:They the, the individuals, the bride and groom the family, whoever is planning this, did not make a mistake And forget to write your extra plus one. So if you are a guest, asking if you can bring a plus one, the answer is no, the answer is no Yeah, and that is unbelievably rude to ask that, because what a weird position to be putting the bride and the groom in.
Speaker 1:What a weird position to be like. No, we didn't forget to invite them Five years ago. I just don't want them there. I would have felt weird and been like oh, i'm going to be like.
Speaker 2:I would have felt weird and been like, oh, if I was the groom and we got that question, I would have. I would have skated around the answer. Now. I would have been like, actually, you, you, your invitation was also a mistake. You were uninvited.
Speaker 1:Yes For poking your invitation, just for that stupid question For that stupid question.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there's never, never, a time that you would ever, ever do that. There's no situation in which you would ask Oh, did you make sure that I could actually bring this extra person, that you don't know that you have to pay 80 hundred $150, $200 a plate?
Speaker 1:It's not a potluck, it's not something where you are. Also, you know, somebody had to pay for the plates and if they, if you weren't invited, if your significant other wasn't invited, so so what we did for our wedding was if you weren't married, you didn't get a plus one. It was cut and dried, just like that. If you were not married to someone, you didn't get a plus one, and I feel, like most brides and grooms and wedding couples, that's like the rule of thumb that they follow. Do you see that differently or no?
Speaker 2:No, I don't see that differently. Yeah, That's yeah.
Speaker 1:Unless it's somebody that they've been dating for, like, like, almost like common law marriage worthy, you know, like if they've been dating for years and years and years and they are the pair like, for example, my mom and my stepdad have been together for geez since I was like three years old And technically they're fiancees but they're not married, you know. But Dan doesn't go anywhere without Sue and vice versa, Like that's always. But they've been together, They have a kid together. That's a package deal, So I'm gonna take it a step further.
Speaker 2:Take it a step further.
Speaker 1:I want to hear Assuming that your children and your babies are invited to someone's wedding. I don't care how close they are to you. I don't care if this is your best friend and you just had a baby.
Speaker 2:No, there's no assumption. There's no assumption. The only that would be the one, the one special case in my mind that if you could, if it's a young child and you got invited but not your child and you can't, you don't either don't want to leave them for whatever reason, or you can't find some. You know you're not gonna be able to find somebody to watch them. Whatever the case, double checking with the bride and groom saying like hey, you know I want to come to your wedding, but I just personally I'm not going to be able to not leave my child, or or whatnot. That is the only scenario in my mind that this is okay to double.
Speaker 1:See, i don't even, i don't even really think, i think for me I would rather someone say you know, we can't find child care, we can't, whatever right, so we're gonna, we're gonna have to say no, unless that's okay with you, like going into it and being like you know, you need to understand when someone doesn't want a baby, especially a newborn baby.
Speaker 2:Yes, you know.
Speaker 1:Like that's a lot.
Speaker 2:I would go to us, i would, i would go to say that and the bride and groom could say that, and that you, as the person with the child, would be understanding of that.
Speaker 1:You just wanted to let them know.
Speaker 2:I'm not saying no because I just don't want to go. I'm just saying no because these are the circumstances and you're not having children.
Speaker 1:Right and give the bride and groom the opportunity to say oh well, you know, it's actually okay if you were to bring your baby, but if they say no, then that's you're out. That's it.
Speaker 2:Absolutely. If you are a grown ass adult asking if you can bring another grown ass adult that was not invited to me. There's very, very few times in this podcast that I'm that aggressive with this. But you're trash. That's a trash statement. I'm sorry. I wasn't gonna go that far, but Oh, i feel strongly about this.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:No, you're not. That's so rude.
Speaker 1:Did you have somebody do that at your wedding?
Speaker 2:No, but I wish they did so. I could have told them no, you can't come, that's it because No it's. But yeah, no, that's common sense, that's common sense.
Speaker 1:That's where I would draw that. We had people ask. But as soon as I said there's 35 people invited, as soon as I said that, it was like okay, we totally get it. It wasn't even like there was no pushback, it was just kind of like, well, would it be okay? And it's like nope, we have 35 spots and you're lucky to have gotten one of them. We didn't say it like that, obviously, but like yeah, no, we're not making an extra space at the table for this person that we barely know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, And I say No no, no, i was gonna say I feel comfortable, confident in saying you're trash, because I know what it's like to be the bride in groom. Or if you are hosting a big event and to have someone work, i'm putting myself in that position. There is already so much stress going on, especially at that stage of the game, to make sure everything's lined up, to have somebody ask you to bring somebody else, that's that yeah, without me just saying like well, no, that's, they were not invited and they're not part of this family or our friend group, like get out of here.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, that's not good, nope, okay, do you want to do one or do you want me to keep going?
Speaker 2:Sure, i'll do one. So okay, let me pull this up, let's see. So for me, no complaining in general about someone's wedding.
Speaker 2:That's a very it's a very good that's so tacky and I know that's a, i know that that's a thing, that, especially after you've been to a lot of weddings, there's this I don't know why there's this human nature to compare other weddings and openly talk about it. If you want to openly talk about it and gossip, do not, do not do it in that room or the reception or the ceremony or within miles of that wedding that is currently actively happening. If you want to do it in the privacy of your own home with your close friends and gossip, which is argumentatively rude anyway, because, again, knowing how many decisions and how much it takes to put together a wedding, and it wasn't yours and you were invited and you got free food and probably free drinks, so suck it up.
Speaker 1:So I feel strongly about this, but anyway, no, i feel very strongly about this one too.
Speaker 2:You wouldn't. You wouldn't be at someone's public presentation like whispering to the person man, this guy sucks like and just like some people would.
Speaker 1:Generally, you're right, some people would we don't want them at the wedding we don't want them at the wedding.
Speaker 2:So that's that's the point. That is it just? if I was the any of the individuals like the you know, the parents, the actual bride and groom and overheard this, be devastated? it would just be like, well, you know, screw you that's not good.
Speaker 1:I can I give an example? I only invited so many people.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, one example okay at our wedding.
Speaker 1:Listen, our wedding was low-key, like low-key. We were saving money wherever we could like it was. It was about the wedding. It was about the marriage, not the wedding for us. Right? we had plastic utensils for our our guests and they were.
Speaker 1:They were like modern, you know the modern black, whatever. But we there were complaints about the plastic utensils, there were complaints about having to get up and go serve yourselves and you know it wasn't like buffet style but you still had to go and get the things that you wanted, kind of. I don't really know if it's it was technically buffet style. Do you hear nilly sleeping and having a dream right now, nilly, now's.
Speaker 2:It's okay, baby, please stop it's very, very, very, very okay. Okay, i just want to make sure it wasn't like ruining it.
Speaker 1:Um, yeah, there were certain guests that had things to say about, um, having to serve themselves and plastic utensils. And I did overhear it at my own wedding and I was just like, wow, you know, i almost wish that I didn't even have you here right now. And that's exactly what the response will be. If you are the one who's complaining and the bride and the groom or the wedding couple hear you, it's like how ungrateful are you, especially for an intimate wedding where you're one of the very few that are invited? like what are you doing? you?
Speaker 2:were selected as a, as an individual person. Whether it was, it doesn't matter. If it was like extended family co-worker, whatever the word, you still were selected for them to pay for your spot at said wedding. Don't do that. Don't do.
Speaker 1:It is so oh god damn rude. So and and my relationship with the people that I over like that I basically overheard saying things like that I like it's not as strong as it was and I know it's something so petty and it's it's little, but it's like for you to even be with us on one of the happiest days of our lives and make comments like that it's. We didn't ask you to pay for utensils. We didn't ask you what your opinion was on serving yourselves. Like you, you don't really get an opinion in that case, because we're the ones who threw this party and are getting married you know, yeah yeah, all right, really from you.
Speaker 1:All right, photo taking. There are a few parts of this. One As guests. One if you are taking photos. First of all, if you're asked not to take photos during the ceremony, just don't. There's no bending those rules. There's no. Oh well, so and so from far away, and blah, blah, blah. There's no bending those rules unless you have talked to the bride and the groom beforehand and made sure. And if the bride and the groom didn't give you specific permission to do that, do not bend the rules, do not take photos.
Speaker 1:Number two is if you are taking photos during the ceremony and there isn't blatantly a rule of do not take photos, then what you need to do is not be in the middle of the aisle. You need to not. If you are sitting in the middle of the aisle with your phone out like this, that's what the photographer sees, that's what the bride and the groom see, that's what everybody sees. So if you want to be the person who is taking photos of the ceremony, you need to sit in the crowd, not in the aisle, so that your phone is not front and center right there. So then we go into cake cutting reception. Just stay out of the photographer's way, just for the love of God, just stay out of the photographer's way. Your phone is not going to do this event justice. Your bride and your groom and your wedding couple has chosen somebody to capture this day in a very specific way and holding up an iPad during the first dance.
Speaker 2:Oh, that one hurts, it's not going to do it.
Speaker 1:It's not going to do it. Similar to cake cutting Do not, do not. If you see the photographer is taking photos of the bride and the groom or the wedding couple and you get behind to the. Basically, if you're taking a photo where your photographer is in your photo at all, you can safely assume you will also be in the photographer's photo.
Speaker 2:That means you're also too close to be recorded.
Speaker 1:Way too close.
Speaker 2:Come on, if I have to like the example on this one is always the first dance. First dance is the amount of room that we get Actually, let's not even talk about room The amount of time that we get to make sure to grab a variety of photos that they're going to treasure, because that is usually one that is a hot moment to grab photos for, and I want to try and get the, honestly, a combination of you want up down, different angles, wide, close, and then usually I'm adding in a few kicker lights to give some kind of you know just that spotlight presentation.
Speaker 1:All the while, the bride and the groom feels super uncomfortable. So they've cut the song in half, so you don't even have the full three minutes You have like a minute and 15 seconds Exactly.
Speaker 2:There are so many of these that I've done that. There is a to the point now where I always ask, like you know, where the band are you cutting it early? How much time do I have to?
Speaker 1:do this.
Speaker 2:And it's yeah. There's been a few where I've had 30 to 45 seconds because they just don't like being on display And I understand that. But I would go to guess that they still feel pretty devastated if I didn't get a good photo of that, Even with me saying and understanding like that's not a lot of time to do it. So if Brooke or I or any other wedding photographer have to get around you or ask you to move and you're holding camera up and you're in the way is so frustrating.
Speaker 1:It is so frustrating because I'm most trying to do our job and to do our job, and also if you're holding up a camera and a photographer taps, you don't, don't what?
Speaker 2:to do?
Speaker 1:Put away your camera, or at least move out of the way Like that's, that's not what we're going to do, that's just their initial response.
Speaker 2:I get that, but yeah, that's yeah, and I I'm very careful about this now because this was really this was a really big topic. when you know, phones have phones with cameras. I haven't been around that long where, like you know, everybody's had them. We're talking in the past, not even 20 years. We're talking 15 maybe.
Speaker 2:So I think in the first half of that this was really strong subject because we had never had to deal with that before. No wedding photographer had had to deal with it. I just say that carefully. People probably still brought cameras and such, but not everyone has a cell phone that they could easily just like video record. That was the difference. So I understand the concept of still wanting to do it, but are you actually going to look at that video? What?
Speaker 1:are you doing?
Speaker 2:with that video. Okay.